The Middle Finger Blog

Omg..the most talented pianists :D

2011-05-24T10:44:00.001-07:00

World's Most Patient Cat

2011-05-23T10:33:00.001-07:00

Sketch: Girls Watch Porn, Too

2011-05-22T07:38:00.001-07:00

Dating..Its complicated Part 2

2011-04-15T00:24:00.001-07:00

My then girlfriend left a condom in her purse because she didn’t trust me to keep it out of my parents sight. Unfortunately, her mother started frequently searching her purse without her knowing and, as a result, I get forever labeled as the scum bag who took their daughter’s innocence.
She was my first… I was like her 3rd or 4th.
-JC

My girlfriend and i like to watch dog the bounty hunter a lot, and over time she started calling me big daddy like in the show. One time during sex she said it, and I replied big momma….big mistake. She thought i implied she was fat, and was promptly put in the doghouse for roughly a week.
-Matt

My girlfriend thinks it’s weird I call my penis “Pinky and the Brain”… women.
-David

My girlfriend and I were having quite an involved hookup session. This included a fair amount of fingering, which went on for a while. Eventually I stopped, wanting to concentrate more on the kissing, and brought my hand up from where it had been. A few minutes later she asked “Is your lip bleeding?” I said no. She let out a quick expletive and ran into the bathroom.
Turned out she had just gotten her period. And the blood had gotten into our mouths.
-Jake

I used to think lol ment lots of love, so once i sent to my boyfriend “aww, sorry your dog died LOL”
-Melanie
The first time my boyfriend ever found one of my tampons was about two month into our relationship. After digging through my bag for food that was not there, he pulled out the brightly colored tampon and asked what it was. After opening it, and making a disgusted face, he handed it to me and asked “how do you activate it?”
-M

The first day I met my ex, he told me that he had given himself a Prince Albert, and he still had it in. I never told him, but every time we cuddled all I thought about was his dismembered member and what exactly I was supposed to do with it.
-Anonymous

My gf is a total nerd, and loves old school arcade games. Sometimes when she’s giving me an hj she’ll get distracted and start making shooting noises exclaiming, “it’s like a joy stick!” Sometimes she worries me, but then I remember she loves to play with my ‘joy stick’.
-C

About a month into my freshman year of college, I started dating this girl (now my ex). We were walking down frat row and we saw some students wearing some ridiculous clothes. I turn to my ex and say, “Look at them; they must be rushin’.” She gives me a puzzled look, and after a moment she replies, “How can you tell they’re Russian? I thought they were speaking English.” I was speechless…
-DK

Rock Bottom - Demotivational Pictures

2011-04-13T03:11:00.000-07:00

Democracy - Demotivational Posters

2011-04-13T03:10:00.000-07:00

Persuasion - Demotivational Posters

2011-04-12T07:05:00.001-07:00

Inception vs Our Real Dreams

2011-04-12T06:32:00.000-07:00

Size Matter - Funny Poster

2011-04-11T21:43:00.001-07:00

Real or Fake - Demotivational Posters

2011-04-11T12:53:00.000-07:00

Demotivation Posters - Breasts Size

2011-04-11T12:26:00.000-07:00

Room Mate Confessions - The best and the worse

2011-04-11T09:47:00.000-07:00

Recently me and my fiance got a house and moved into it. Well we got one with an apartment in it to pay the extra mortgage. Well the last guy we had there was a snob. He went against the rules we gave him just to piss us off. Then to tip it off he never payed rent. So I called the cops saying that we found some guy in this room after we came back from a vacation. Now he is in jail. Hey he wanted free accommodation, he got it.
John S. from FSU

My roommate is my brother and in general we have never had any problem living together but before we went to college my brother took my car one time to pick up his girlfriend to go to a movie. On the way back from the movie apparently he decided to pull into an abandoned parking lot and get it on with his gf. In general I wouldn’t care except 1. I’d never been laid in my car and 2. at the end of his trial he called himself the “sultan of sex” and put his shirt around his head in a turban and his girlfriend wrote on the steam “sultan of sex” so every time it fogged up it would show. A week ago he got his first car and 30 mins ago I had sex in it with my girlfriend and wrote “SOS 2” so that every time it fogs he can see it. Sorry little brother I know your excited about your Mustang GT convertible but, well a price need to be paid. I know you will read this and get pissed but it was worth it.
S.K. from UCF

You’re a real piece of shit. You had a smoking hot, awesome girlfriend and constantly cheated on her with greasy Jersey hoodrats. You weren’t that bad of a roommate but you sucked as a person and for that reason you needed to be taught a lesson. So I waited until you left to go party one night and reversed the peephole in the door. Then I called your gf when you inevitably came back with whoever the Snooki-lookalike was that week and told her to come over. One gander through the peephole was all it took for her to take me back to her room and let me rawdog the everliving shit out of her. On second thought, you were a GREAT roommate.
Greased Up Deaf Guy

Hey Blondie! Remember how expensive your philosophy book was? 105$, right? Well, when you asked me to order it for you with your money because you ‘couldn’t figure out how to order’, I knew you were lazy and trying to manipulate me. So I ordered it for less. About 100$ less on Half.com. Buy your own shit, and rinse out your red hair dye. It didn’t help.
Shay-shay F. from MCC

My roommate was a total bitch who fussed and bitched because I wouldn’t clean up her mess or take out her trash. I tried my hardest to be nice to her, but when that didn’t work I posted her number on Craigslist asking for the dirtiest text messages ever. When those stopped coming I decided to just burst out laughing every time I would see her. It would make her wonder what I had done when I hadn’t even had to put any effort at all into a prank. I loved seeing her posts on her Twitter, that she thought I didn’t know about, wondering what I had done to her stuff.
Anon. S from AASU

I use to live with a die hard P.E.T.A. vegan who refused to pay bills, would blare music/movies at all hours of the night, get stoned in the house, and would constantly eat my food. When I would confront her about it she would deny it and try to turn things around on me. So to get even, I started putting meat products in almost everything I made and would put the left overs in the fridge knowing she would eat them once everyone went to sleep. You’re not a vegan anymore, bitch.
Z.K.

My roommate and I decided to teach my (now ex) boyfriend a lesson after I found out he’d cheated on me constantly over the 4 years we’d been together. He didn’t know I knew yet, so it was easy to get him to meet me in a secluded little park for some ‘us time’. I convinced him to let me blindfold him and got him naked. Then, after writing in permanent marker that it was over, I ran off with his clothes, keys and cellphone. My roommate and I drove over to his place, where we hacked into his facebook (he didn’t think I’d seen his password, but I had) and changed his password. But not before writing all over facebook all of the dirt he’d told me about some of his closest friends (including his best mate’s girlfriend whining that he was no good in the sack). It was fantastic, but the icing on the cake was swapping sim cards and changing every number on his phone to mine. He couldn’t get hold of his mates and vice versa. It took him weeks to sort it out. You played me, but I won. F*ck you.
Jade Y. from UCSB

The Facebook Comment Flowchart

2011-04-11T01:22:00.001-07:00

Dating..Its Complicated

2011-04-11T01:18:00.001-07:00

I was dating a woman that was much older than me, and instead of breaking up with me the more traditional way, she had her friend lie to me and tell me that she got cancer and was dying, so she didn’t need to tell me she was cheating on me and getting married to another guy.
Kevin D

I didn’t have a serious boyfriend until the summer of third year and I was very slow getting used to physical stuff. I am a Christian and I don’t want to have sex until marriage. I was actually surprised the first time I noticed my boyfriend checking out my rack. For three months we didn’t get past first and then I gave in and we got all the way to hand jobs. My boyfriend likes to go down on me but I told him I was uncomfortable doing it back. I don’t want to admit that what I am really scared of is germs, he thinks I’m worried about religion.
Bethany D. from U of Waterloo

The day my best friend lost his virginity i was woken up to a text that said “ The pea is in the pod, I repeat…The pea is in the pod”.
James s from sbu

When my girlfriend went out of town on spring break she made me go on her account to feed her Neopets.
Jason K

My ex nicknamed my junk ‘Squirtle’
K M

My girlfriend (now ex) and me got into a heated argument about “trust” It resulted in her breaking up with me because I haven’t slept with enough girls to make her comfortable enough to trust me… talk about insecurity issues.
Anon Cat from FGCU

I was dating this bloke whom I had known for a while and had previous infatuated experience with, but when it came to our first time having sex, he looked down at his penis and commented “I know it isn’t much”. At the time it didn’t bother me because frankly, I had nothing to compare it to. But now, I can see that he was accurate in his first statement.

That jerk deserves his minuscule wiener.
Anonymous

My girlfriend had just watched Apollo 13 before she came on skype to talk to me. I said it was good but not as good as Apollo 1 as a joke. She said as serious as ever that she’d never seen it not knowing that it didn’t exist.
Andrew Nonymous

When I was still in high school I helped my now ex-girlfriend move into her new house with her, her friend, and her grandmother. I thought it would be a good idea to let her give me head with the door open because I thought that if anybody walked up, I would hear the floor creak. Turned out, the floor didn’t creak and her grandmother walked in on us. The most awkward part was that I was 15 and she was my ride home.
N J

Me and my girlfriend had been having steady sex for a few months, no big deal, but our parents didn’t know yet. One day my girlfriend and I are sitting on her bed and her mom asks us if we’ve had sex…. Most awkward moment of my life when her mom found out she wasn’t a virgin and I hear her get a lecture all but 2 feet away
Zach

One weekend my long distance girlfriend came over for the weekend. Unlucky for me she was was having massive mood swings. So we were making food in the microwave, and she poked one to check it it was warm enough. Joking around, I asked her “Did you wash your hands?”. She burst into tears and ran away. I probably never laughed so hard in my life.
Shayne T

The Middle Finger Blog

2011-04-11T00:18:00.001-07:00

Welcome to the Middle Finger BLog, a blog about showing your nerve, giving the well deserved finger to the deserving and unleashing your share of frustration and maniacness at the crowd. Its a blog about messing with the system and showing that the tables can be turned over it, explore your share of wackiness here.

Why it started ?

It all started when a *itch trashed my trust and i felt like rage and anger rising through my veins, but i decided to channelize it into something creative. Call it passive-aggressive-creative-digital-revenge . But over time as I realized, it had a lot more potential and I decided to create the Middle Finger Blog.

What it will cover ?

Anything that catches my fancy, rest assured it will be good.

Some of you may find the content offensive, they are encouraged to click the red [X] button on the top right corner of the screen. The rest are welcome to enjoy.

“xero”