"Great Story. Compelling and Rich."

Writing Tip from Don Miller

2011-02-17T09:04:00.000-05:00

I love Don Miller. He's the author of Blue Like Jazz - one of my favorite books. Lately, he's been posting a lot of tips for writers on his blog, and I wanted to share this one.

How Stuff Gets Created | Donald Miller's Blog: "How Stuff Gets Created

I’m learning the fruit of my creative effort often ripens instantly. I’ll sit down and get thousands of words, but then a week later, working with the same discipline, will have nothing. But my job is not to make the words come. Who am I to make the words come? My job is no different than a farmer. I till the land. I fertilize the soil. I plant the seeds. Unlike the farmer, though, I am surprised when the green shoots sprout in the spring. I think perhaps it is magic, and it will never happen for me again. But the farmer knows if he tills the land, and is blessed enough to get rain, the harvest will come."

All writers get writer's block. It's inevitable. You sit down at a computer or your desk, switch on your laptop or grab a pen and...nothing.

I remember while writing my thesis that I had a two-week period where I literally couldn't write anything. Nothing happened when I sat down. It was as if my brain was locked in a bottle with all the creative juices stopped up.

It's really hard for me to break through times like that. Most often, I have to admit that I just give up and go watch a movie, read a book, or go for a run.

Don's words are an encouragement to writers everywhere. It's okay to struggle, as long as you keep on struggling. Push forward, plant the seeds, then see what happens months -- or years -- down the road.

Saving Takes Time and Discipline - Room for Debate - NYTimes.com

2011-02-09T08:51:00.000-05:00

Read this today in the NY Times Opinion Section...

Saving Takes Time and Discipline - Room for Debate - NYTimes.com:

"Shedding debt is a lot like shedding pounds. It involves slow, steady, disciplined effort before it yields substantial results. It means passing up short-term pleasures for longer-term gains. And getting rid of debt, like getting rid of extra weight, is a do-it-yourself activity for most people. Nonetheless, American’s efforts to reduce debt, like the efforts to reduce obesity, need not be exclusively do-it-yourself."

In her editorial, Barbara Dafoe Whitehead, equates paying down debt with saving. And I think she's right. You can't really start building a strong nest egg if you're being dragged down by debt. Credit card bills, school loans, car payments, mortages--all that draws you down. But if you look at paying them off as making an investment in the future, you're off to a good start.

I've been thinking about this a lot lately. Sonja and I want to build our savings, but we're also faced with the challenge of paying off our debts. We're much better off (in terms of debt) than the average American, but it's still a hill to climb. Instead of thinking every dollar we put towards paying down debt as a dollar not saved, we should probably look at it as a key component of our overall savings plan.

(Okay, I realize this is probably the most boring post I've ever written... but I found the editorial helpful in putting a new perspective on things. If you're in the same boat, I hope you glean something from it as well).

Seth's Blog: The first rule of doing work that matters

2010-12-21T09:09:00.000-05:00

Seth's Blog: The first rule of doing work that matters

Amen!

The New Laziness

2010-11-04T08:04:00.003-04:00

I read Seth Godin's blog (just like a bazillion other people do). He had another stellar post this morning on the New Laziness:

But the new laziness has nothing to do with physical labor and everything to do with fear. If you're not going to make those sales calls or invent that innovation or push that insight, you're not avoiding it because you need physical rest. You're hiding out because you're afraid of expending emotional labor.

He's spot on. People -- myself included -- operate out of fear of failure, that they don't know what they're doing, or that they might be rocking the boat. That's laziness.

Proverbs 13:4 says, "Lazy people want much but get little, but those who work hard will prosper.

Don't be afraid of a little hard work!

(Do yourself a favor, and if you don't subscribe to Seth's feed, do it!)

Cheering a Winless Team

2010-11-03T12:05:00.002-04:00

I love sports. And I love rooting for my teams.

Sadly, this year I've divorced myself from all emotions when it comes to my love of the Buffalo Bills. I've done it for psychological reasons. The Bills are too terrible to care about. I'd only be causing myself emotional pain, stress, and angst if I cared about them this year.

Gregg Easterbrook, the TMQ of ESPN, wrote this in his weekly NFL column:

Sour Play of the Week: Reaching overtime for the second consecutive week, the Buffalo Bills, the NFL's sole winless team, faced fourth-and-7 on the Kansas City 40. Should Buffalo attempt a 57-yard field goal by Rian Lindell, one of the league's best place-kickers? Jacksonville won a game last month on a 59-yard field goal. Or should Buffalo go for the first down? Wait -- the league's only winless team cannot be punting in opposition territory in overtime! Boom went the punt, and it took Kansas City just two snaps to pass the point where the ball would have been had Buffalo gone for it and failed. Earlier in the contest, the league's only winless team punted on fourth-and-inches.

Buffalo has not reached the postseason in 11 years, and in that time had a succession of headmasters -- Gregg Williams, Mike Mularkey, Dick Jauron -- who coached as though terrified of their own shadows. TMQ started the Preposterous Punts item after Williams, with the Bills trailing in the second half, ordered a punt on fourth-and-2 from the New England 32. Now Chan Gailey is coaching afraid, too, and you can't reverse years of losing psychology by running scared. In Buffalo's preseason opener, Gailey's first game wearing a Bills headset, Buffalo was down 21-3 and facing fourth-and-inches at midfield: Gailey sent in the punt unit. Sure, that was just a preseason game. But the message to players was "nothing has changed; we expect to lose just like last year and the year before that." And so far, Gailey is coaching as though he expects to lose.

I watched the game, too. And when I saw the punt team coming onto the field at the moment Easterbrook described, I forgot I didn't care about the Bills this year. I screamed my head off at the coach, "You haven't won a game! Why are you punting?! You don't deserve to win!"

Then I remembered that I don't care. I wasn't even upset when CBS stopped showing the overtime footage at 4:15 to "stay in accordance with NFL regulation." And I managed not to punch anything when the word came down that the Chiefs had gone on to win the game.

I don't care about the Bills this year. They haven't done anything to make me care again.

How many days until the draft?

Your Moment Of Auto-Erotica: "Oh, How He Tempted Her."

2010-08-25T13:05:00.000-04:00

Via Deadspin.com... and including the most amazing photo/caption combination I've ever seen (well this week, at least). Click through for the image...

Your Moment Of Auto-Erotica: "Oh, How He Tempted Her.":
We recently discovered—but then forget—the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale.

From Shades of Love, by Dorien Kelly & Barbara Dunlop:

"When was the last time she had kissed a man with more than just a quick, casual brush of the lips? Claire knew the answer to that question the instant Derek's mouth settled against hers: it had been far too long. She had nearly forgotten the pleasure of having someone so close, of learning someone new."

Do This One Thing and You’ll Rise Above Your Peers | Donald Miller's Blog

2010-08-06T08:43:00.000-04:00

Do This One Thing and You’ll Rise Above Your Peers | Donald Miller's Blog

I believe this is true, but I don't want to:

"That said, though, if it’s true leaders are readers, than it’s easier than ever to be a leader. In fact, if you’ll commit to reading a single book, you’ll be, approximately, in the top 50% of all Americans. I’m not kidding. If you’ll read just one more book before you die, you’ll leave half the people around you in the dust.

According to Para Publishing, 1/3 of high school graduates never read another bookfor the rest of their lives. And 42% of college graduates follow suit. 70% of U.S. adults have not stepped into a bookstore in the last 7 years and 80% of American families did not purchase or read a book last year."

That's some rough news. However, Don Miller is totally right... if you're a reader, you'll become a leader. Everyone's looking for the secret to getting ahead, but it could be just as simple as opening up a book, propping up your feet, possibly pouring a class of wine (or scotch), and digging into the thoughts of someone smarter than you.

Couldn't hurt, right?

A Welsh View: Aerial London

2010-08-05T08:17:00.000-04:00

I, too, love this aerial shot of London... Sonja and I are talking about a trip there this winter/spring. *crossed fingers*

A Welsh View: Aerial London

Haiti - Working in Ktadb (Photo Slideshow)

2010-08-05T08:04:00.001-04:00

Here's a short video of my trip to Haiti, if you're interested.

You can also find my full photo albums on Facebook:

Haiti - Part 1

Haiti - Part 2

Travel Journal from Haiti

2010-08-05T08:03:00.001-04:00

Two weeks ago, I visited Haiti. Just over four months removed from the earthquake that wrecked devastation on what was already the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere, much of the country is still in shambles. And yet, in the midst of the rubble and poverty, there is an enormous wealth of faith, hope, and joy.

I joined a weeklong trip to Port au Prince through Adventures in Missions. We spent the week working in the tent community of Ktadb. This location is on the outskirts of the city and, as far as we knew, hadn’t received any international aid since the January 12th earthquake. Just fewer than 3,600 people live in Ktadb, divided into about 600 handmade shelters.

When we arrived, there wasn’t a single tarp or tent in sight. Families had built homes out of wooden stakes and used bed sheets and clothing sewn together to form walls. It’s the rainy season in Haiti, and when the storms come, they soak through the meager coverings and turn the ground underfoot to thick, sucking mud. Most of the families have literally nothing but the clothes on their backs. The lucky ones sleep on cinderblocks to keep out of the mud—those less fortunate sleep on the dirt. I’ll be honest, it’s painful to see."

We spent the first two days of the trip moving from shelter to shelter, meeting the residents, seeing how they lived, praying for them (and accepting offers from them to pray for us in return). The residents shared their stories and asked about us, too. We didn’t immediately start handing out supplies and food because we wanted to avoid creating a dependency on foreign assistance. Rather, we started building relationships, mobilized the community leaders, played with the kids, helped housewives wash laundry, and dug foundations for new homes alongside some workers. As we pitched in, meeting the Haitians where they lived, I saw things I couldn’t believe.

There was the old man who had lost his son in the quake and struggled with injuries himself—yet he said he praised God every day for life. That’s belief beyond anything I know.

Two students, Reginald and Yvelise, who are both studying to be doctors, proudly talked about how they’ve continued studying at home while the deanship of the university searches for a new site to rebuild the collapsed school. Both have hope that they’ll return to college, finish their degrees, and then use what they’ve learned to help their country recover.

Remy, a 14-year-old boy living in a shelter with his older brother, pitched in to help us place tarps over the homes of single mothers, women with children, and the elderly. He never once asked for us to cover his own home, knowing others needed help more than he did. Remy showed me strength.

Even before we brought out the boxes of donated toys and sporting goods, we saw so much joy on children's faces. They were more than willing to sing and dance and clap their hands, even though many hadn’t eaten in a day, two, or more. All they wanted was to hold my hand, be asked their name, and hear mine. That’s joy in a place where sadness should reign.

Through generous donations, we were able to distribute nearly 200 tarps, making sure that the neediest of the needy received theirs first. We also purchased over $4,200 of rice and beans, which the local community leaders distributed themselves. It will only feed the residents of Ktadb for a couple days, but it’s a start.

I went to Haiti thinking that I could help—and I did in the smallest way possible—but what really happened is that Haiti helped me. If faith, hope, and joy can survive in a place where none of that should exist, then I believe we can have those things here, too. I left Haiti being more thankful for the things that really matter in life—family and friends—than ever before.

I also left with the reminder that we really can do something to care for those in need. It can be as simple as giving the extra canned goods from your pantry to a local food bank or texting “HAITI” to the American Red Cross to donate $10 to the earthquake relief effort. You don’t have to go yourself. Whatever you choose to do, though, you’ll help make the world a little better and make sure that hope spreads out a little further than it did before.

(This article originally appeared here. Sorry it took me so long to get it live on this blog!)

World Vision's 3-month Update on Haiti

2010-04-13T11:24:00.004-04:00

The numbers aren't pretty.

230,00 killed
1 million homeless
2 million in need of aid

It's been three months since the January 12th earthquake that rocked Haiti and World Vision just sent out an email detailing their part of the relief efforts. They've been working in Haiti for 30-plus years and were uniquely positioned to start rescue/relief work within hours of the quake.

Here's what World Vision has been able to do (thanks to partners and donors):

"Gifts from partners like you are bringing hope to quake-affected children and families. World Vision began providing help within hours of the disaster. During the first three months after the earthquake, you helped us distribute food to more than 1.5 million people, and provide blankets, tarps, tents, hygiene kits, mosquito nets, and more to over 100,000 people.

World Vision was in Haiti long before the quake — caring for 300,000 children. With the help of generous donors like you, we’ll be there long afterward, too."

While things are definitely not great (check out The Big Picture's post: Haiti: 70 Days Later), it is great to hear good news coming from the country.

Doug and I will be there in five weeks.

(Image from World Vision's Twitter profile.)

This is What It's All About

2010-04-12T09:59:00.002-04:00

Why do Sonja and I spend our Thursday nights with high schoolers? This is why:

This is from our spring retreat weekend.

I think my favorite part is the fact that the teens are out there with their friends in the freezing cold (40 degree) water, just to be a part of the event and show their support. Awesome stuff!

(By the way, if you're not familiar with baptism, Wikipedia has a pretty good description.)

Two Things... Probably Contradictory

2010-04-08T09:44:00.003-04:00

I read this quote this morning in Crazy Love (which, by the way, you should buy and read right now).

"The way we live out our day is the way we live out our lives." - Annie Dillard

Just marinate on what that means for a second...

(Pause)

(Moving on...)

Of course, having put something out there that's profound and life-changing, I am now also going to share with you something else that I saw this morning. It is also life-changing. But for entirely different reasons.

What's better than a moon-faced, chubby, Taiwanese kid singing Whitney Houston? Practically nothing.

Granite State of Mind

2010-04-05T09:38:00.002-04:00

I shared this on Facebook, but figured you should see its genius here, too.

Opening Day! (of Allergy Season)

2010-04-05T08:06:00.003-04:00

Friday night, I went over to my parents' place (because I like to party) and immediately started sneezing when I walked in the door. This isn't at all unusual -- my parents still have two dogs and a cat as a ploy to ensure I never, ever move back and only visit for short periods of time, sporadically at best.

The thing was, after I left, I didn't stop sneezing. Not in the few hours after, not the next day, nor the day after that. It just went on through the entire weekend. Now as I type, my eyes itch, my breathing is wheezy, and I have a box of Kleenex next to my desk. Hmm... it must be allergy season.

Oh joy.

Let me tell you, I absolutely love springtime. For anyone who lives in the Northeast, you know how great this time of year can be. The snow/sleet/rain/hail/ice cubes from heaven have stopped falling. You can't see your breath in the morning and you fingers don't feel like they're going to fall off in the time it takes to walk from your front door to your car.

Up here, spring is an event. People start wearing shorts and flip-flops once it hits 50, even though it's still probably about a month too early. Red Sox jerseys and sun dresses re-enter as wardrobe staples. Bikers pull their motorcycles from storage (note to Sonja: think how glorious it would be to take that first scooter ride of the season? Can I PLEASE get one?). Everyone gathers outside to hang out in driveways and on front porches while soaking in the sun's rays. It's glorious. It's a total "winter's over" reawakening, and I love it. I celebrate it. I flip-flop and short it. I even played nine holes on Saturday (so I could repeatedly four-putt it).

Everything would be perfect if I could just breathe.

My goodness, is this time of the year awful for fellow allergy sufferers. The majority of you won't get what I'm talking about, but with the flowers blooming and trees budding, it's like two weeks of hell on earth for people like me. The worst thing is that I shouldn't be outside, but it's so nice that I just can't avoid it. I want to swing the clubs. I want to run 15-20 miles a week. I want to go for walks downtown and sit on the side porch. And, ideally, I'd like to do it without feeling like my head is going to explode.

Still, it's a small price to pay for spring. See you out there! I'll be the guy with the surgical mask on.

Photo from Kleenex.com

Going to Haiti

2010-03-26T10:31:00.009-04:00

It seems like every year or so, the news cycle stops hovering around elections, politics, and personal finance to spend two weeks focused on a natural disaster. In 2004, it was the tsunami. Hurricane Katrina hit the Gulf Coast in 2005. We caught a break in '06 and '07 before 2008's earthquake hit the Sichuan province in China. And early this year, we all know about the massive earthquake that devastated Haiti--the poorest nation in the Western Hemisphere.

To be completely honest, these events never resonated with me. Oh sure, I watched the news and maybe contributed a few bucks to the Red Cross, but once the news cycle moved on, so did I. Katrina probably had the most impact on me, but that's only because I visited New Orleans for a conference a year later and saw the city still struggling to recover. Even then, I wasn't really moved to do anything more about it then tell a few people what I saw.

The earthquake that hit Haiti, though, was different. Like most of us, I watched the news coverage--but it grabbed me the way other stories didn't. I saw the devastation, watched the Haitian people scream and cry in the streets for help, and my heart absolutely broke for them. I really couldn't tell you why. Maybe it was a combination of things:

These photo essays from The Big Picture, which captured the pain and suffering and reality of what happened: Earthquake in Haiti, Haiti: 48 Hours Later, and Haiti: 70 Days Later
The fact that Haiti is only 600 miles from the U.S. (about the distance from Boston to Buffalo) and yet malnutrition and poverty run rampant there.
Some of my earliest memories of church involve listening to a Haitian congregation sing, laugh, and pray noisily as their congregation met in a room below the sanctuary in our building.
A slow realization that I had a chance to really do something to show love and help those in need.

So a few weeks ago, when my friend Doug asked if I wanted to go to Haiti, I immediately said, "Yes."

Plans fell into place and I can now let you know that this May (the 23rd to the 29th), Doug and I will travel to Haiti with Adventures in Missions--an organization that's dedicated to helping deliver support and relief to some of the most impoverished areas of the world.

We really don't know what to expect. The country, which was impoverished before, has been completely devastated in the capital city of Port au Prince and surrounding areas. There are so many needs--food, water, medicine, rebuilding, rehabilitation--that we don't know yet what area we'll be helping in. All we know now is that we're going and we're going to help however we can.

But we can't do it alone. We need help. Maybe help from you.

We need prayer... neither of us have ever done anything like this or put ourselves into a situation like this one.
We need awareness... not for what we're doing, but that Haiti needs help. Recovery will take years, but the news cycle has already moved on. Please don't forget.
We need help... again, not for us, but for Haiti. If you want to help support our trip, you can do that by donating through eventbrite or directly. Know that we plan to use any money we raise beyond our own costs to buy supplies to send to Port au Prince in advance. (Other great organizations you may want to support include CharityWater.org, the Red Cross, and Yele Haiti)

I'll keep posting on this blog with trip updates, news from Haiti, and everything else. So stay tuned.

Thank you for listening and thanks in advance for helping.

(Here's a video Doug sent me from the blog WhyIsMarko. It was shot recently in Port au Prince.)

(I wrote this post while listening to "Blood Bank EP" by Bon Iver)

You Might Die Today -- Scared or Inspired?

2010-03-17T08:40:00.003-04:00

I'm reading Crazy Love by Francis Chan (my good friend Doug Tappan) picked it out. I just started it and have only read two chapters, but already the book's gripped me and got me thinking.

This morning, I thought about death. Good times!

I wanted to share the chapter's intro with you and see if you started thinking about mortality, too. And, if you did, how do you feel about it--scared or inspired?

"You could die before you finish reading this chapter. I could die while you're reading it. Today. At any moment.

But it's easy to think about today as just another day. An average day where you go about life concerned with your to-do list, preoccupied by appointments, focused on family, thinking about your desires and needs.

On the average day, we live caught up in ourselves. On the average day, we don't consider God very much. On the average day, we forget that our life truly is a vapor.

But there is nothing normal about today. Just think about everything that must function properly for you to survive. For example, your kidneys. The only people who really think about their kidneys are people whose kidney's don't work correctly. The majority of us take for granted our kidneys, liver, lungs, and other internal organs that we're dependent upon to continue living.

What about driving down the road at 65-mph, only a few feet away from cars going the opposite direction at the same speed? Someone would only have to jerk his or her arm and you would be dead. I don't think that's morbid; I think it's reality.

It's crazy that we think today is just a normal day to do whatever we want with. To those of us who say, 'Today or tomorrow we will go to this or that city, spend a year there, carry on business and make money,' James [the brother of Jesus] writes, 'Why, you do not even know what will happen tomorrow. What is your life? You are a mist that appears for a little while and then vanishes' (4:13-14)

When you think about it, that's a little disconcerting. But even after reading those verses, do you really believe you could vanish at any minute? That perhaps today you will die? Or do you instead feel somehow invincible?

Frederick Buechner writes, 'Intellectually we all know that we will die, but we do not really know it in the sense that the knowledge becomes a part of us. We do not really know it in the sense of living as thought it were true. On the contrary, we tend to live as though our lives will go on forever.'"

Sorry guys, I don't mean to be a total downer... but when I read this, it got me thinking: what if today really matters? What if we lived every day as if it were a gift or our last one? What would we do differently?

(And would we blog about it?)

Photo credit: CrazyLoveBook.com

A Moment of Joy

2009-08-03T14:22:00.008-04:00

I subscribe to NY Times' emails and along with daily headlines, an afternoon update and news alerts, I also get the opinion section. Typically, I scan the first couple of editorials and delete the email (it comes in midday and I'm usually caught up in whatever I'm doing to go in depth if it isn't a new Friedman column), but this piece from the Happy Days blog caught my eye the other day.

Averted Vision, by Tim Kreider, started out as a piece about travel, which is why I read it (I've been back from Italy for six weeks and already I'm ready for the next adventure). In the article, Kreider nailed something that I've thought about quite a bit:

"I wonder, sometimes, whether it is a perversity peculiar to my own mind or just the common lot of humanity to experience happiness mainly in retrospect. I have of course considered the theory that I am an idiot who fails to appreciate anything when he actually has it and only loves what he’s lost...We do each have a handful of those moments, the ones we only take out to treasure rarely, like jewels, when we looked up from our lives and realized: 'I’m happy.'" - Tim Kreider

Happiness -- however you define it -- is elusive. And those moments of perfect happiness, what Kreider calls "jewels" and C.S. Lewis details in his memoir Surprised by Joy (one of my favorite books), come rarely if at all.

There are those, I believe, who spend their entire lives searching for these momentary glimpses of joy, to feel their heart leap within their chest and the fates align, only to have the experience of a moment of perfect happiness slip away.

But there are others who know what it means to view the world on pause. They have felt time slow, a smile spread, and have known they have found -- or been granted -- a moment meant only for them at that time and in that place. Like the sun breaking through the clouds and illuminating one small patch in a beam of warm light, joy invades their soul and lingers there. It only comes for a moment. A moment only. Then, it is gone, but its kiss remains. Forever.

Perhaps this is why we (I?) travel? We're searching for the sublime. We press on, visiting cities, tasting food, sampling life, always pushing further, hoping that by turning the next corner or taking the next step, we'll get a glimpse of that brief moment of joy. It's not something that the travel books tell you where you can find your personal share (although that's why we buy them). It's something you can only find yourself.

When Sonja and I visited Florence, I knew there was one place we had to go. I'd been there once before, seven years earlier, and had taken with me an image when I left. I had kept a picture in my mind of Italy ever since that first visit, knowing it was a place I'd somehow return, and when I did, I knew where I'd go.

Eventually.

The Piazza Michelangelo overlooks the Arno from a point high above and just south and east of the city's center. Though it's not far from the river's edge, it's a steep climb to the top, first through winding Florentine streets, then up several staircases. The cobblestones are uneven, the steps spaced too far apart, and if you visit in the summer like we did, you'll be sweating and thirsty when you reach the top.

But when you do, you'll be rewarded by what is possibly the greatest landscape view in Western Europe. As you stand atop the Piazza, all of Florence spreads out below you -- walls of earthy yellows and browns and burned red tile rooftops. Towers poke up here and there, with the Duomo's massive dome dominating the city scape. Beyond the city are the rolling, green hills of Tuscany. To your back is a tall stone tower where bells chime out the hours. Past that roll more hills, one after another, criss-crossed by lines of olive trees and grape vines.

There's a staircase there that points almost directly west. On a summer night in June, the marble steps are warm from a day spent in the sun, and so are you. I remembered from my first visit to Florence that people gather there every evening, talk softly, and watch the sun go down. And I knew that's where I wanted to be.

We climbed the hill and found a spot on the stairs, just a few feet away from a young Italian man gently strumming an acoustic guitar. On our way, we had stopped at a small grocery store and bought cups and a bottle of wine. I pulled the cork and poured each of us a glassful. We sipped, the thin plastic of the cups crinkling under our fingers, talked in low tones about the day, and listened to the guitar. We clapped after ever song, not loudly but politely, exchanging smiles with the guitarists and the other couple dozen people on the steps.

I don't remember what we talked about, exactly, what we said or how we said it. I just remember never wanting to leave and that though the sun set slowly, it wasn't slow enough. And I can recall, in complete clarity, the feeling of perfect contentment -- the warmth of a heart at rest -- that overwhelmed me in that moment.

It only lasted a few minutes. The sun eventually set and we walked back down the hill, holding hands and heading back to our hotel. But I know there's a part of me still on that hill, still watching the sunset with the music in the background and Sonja sitting next to me.

I'm baaaack!

2009-07-27T21:08:00.006-04:00

Oh man, does it feel good to be back or what? Let's jump right in and get caught up...

What the Heck has Mike Been Doing?

Getting Married
I'm sure you've seen the pictures on Facebook (Speaking of, I'm now at www.facebook.com/nagel.mike - the other itinerations of my custom url had been taken by Mike Nagel's with far fewer friends and way more time on their hands. And I'm mad about it.). Please do take the time to soak in the glory that is a tailored tuxedo worn with white Chuck Taylors, while you're at it. We do promise to post pics of our own as soon as we get the digitals back from our photographer.

As I was remarking to a co-worker the other day, the process of getting married is pretty much like having a second, full-time job. One that's a lot of fun, but also takes a lot of work, a lot of time, a lot of patience, and you have to pay half the salary of your other job to work there. Oh, and when the job's over, there's no exit interview. There's just half a cake left and a car ride to a court-mandated, two-week vacation where you're left to wonder, "Did that just happen?"

I do want to write more about the wedding in the near future, but for now I feel guilty about mentioning it at all since Sonja and I have yet to post a single thank-you in the seven weeks after the Big Day.

Honeymooning
If you have about six hours to spare (like, you know, when you're at work reading this), you can check out the pictures of our two-week trip to Italy: Rome, Florence, a quick stop in Pisa, a day trip via bike through Tuscany, and Venice. As you'll see, the trip was absolutely amazing... and I'll write all about it coming up. Suffice it to say, we have a whole lot of souvenirs hanging on the walls of our place.

Moving In
Speaking of, did you know when someone moves in with someone else it takes them twice as long to do it as it would if just one of them moved? Yeah, we're still finding places to put all of Sonja's stuff and others places where we can donate mine.

More importantly, when you get married, people give you a lot of stuff. And they give you a lot of money. We're enjoying refurbishing the kitchen and the non-existent linen closet.

Work
Yup, back at it. Moving on!

Reading
Okay, so I'm not reading that much, but I am reading a little. I'll even tell you what I'm reading - Team of Rivals - in the hope that the next time one of you asks what I'm reading I'll have finished and moved on to something else. If not, I'll lie and say I've been buried up to *here* in literary magazines and haven't touched any book-length work in ages, darling.

Music
So, here's what it's my iPod of late that you should totally check out... MuteMath's Spotlight EP - fantastic single from an album that drops on 8/18, Our Lady Peace Burn, Burn if only for nostalgic purposes, The Devil Wears Prada Dear Love: A Beautiful Dischord suggested by a dude from GYG, and Michael Jackson Off the Wall because it's great to remember when the King of Pop was still royalty.

And While I was Writing This Post...
I learned how to pop popcorn on the stove without a JiffyPop exploding foil bag.

Waiting for the Bus...

2009-05-04T21:55:00.003-04:00

I never could understand the propensity we have toward standing in line. We'll run from one place just so we can wait in the next and stare at the back of some stranger's head. It's the very definition of "hurry up and wait."

Right now, I'm waiting for the bus, seated on an uncomfortable wooden bench. But even though it's hard, unforgiving and isn't really angled well at all for lumbar support, it's way better than standing in the line that's ever-growing in front of me. It now snakes its way past the men's restroom entrance, pushes beyond Honey Dew Donuts and threatens to block the doorway to the women's commode.

This bus, by the way, doesn't leave for another 20 minutes. And it leaves every hour, on the hour. it's not like it's anything exciting or it'll get so full that you'll miss it. Rush hour doesn't even hit full swing for another hour. And by then, the transportation company will be running three buses every hour to handle the demand.

It seems a lot like amusement parks, waiting for the bus. We'll gladly shell out $60 for a day's worth of getting sunburned while waiting upwards of 90 minutes for less than 90 seconds of pleasure. We'll then take a half-dozen heart-pounding rides in 12 hours, then call it a day—but not before buying the obligatory t-shirt to proudly proclaim, "I rode the XXX!" The underlying statement of said t-shirt being, "I waited two-and-a-half hours to do it. Aren't you jealous?"

Back in the terminal. There are even more people in line now. Each maintains a nice, safe distance from each other, not speaking, not making eye contact. They're jealously guarding their respective spaces, though. The posture of each potential bus-rider says, "This is MY place, MY spot. I am 5th. I am 8th. I am 12th." and so on. Some have even dropped knapsacks, positioning them between feet, building an even more solid foundation to their unspoken, and heretofore, unchallenged 2-foot by 2-foot plot of line land.

I wonder if the business woman in heels' feet hurt? Do the shoulders of the backpacker ache? And, why, pray God, would you try to make a 6-year-old stay in one space for 45 minutes before boarding a bus that'll make him sit still in his seat for another hour?

Lines suck.

On top of all of it, when they move, they never go fast enough. I'll join it when they start taking tickets and passengers begin heading into the idling bus, single file, shuffling for seats. But if I've neglected to take my ticket out of my bag or if I get my rolling suitcase caught on a stanchion, then I'll be subjected to rolled eyes, muttered curses, and my nearest neighbor standing ominously close. All because of a few seconds delay.

My line on lines? They're overrated. Get in late, get out early and cut wherever possible.

Note: I wrote this a couple weeks back, in a notebook, while waiting for the bus. Forgot to upload it here... and, by the way, I will try to update more often than ever two months.

Jesus is a Friend of Mine

2009-03-27T15:36:00.002-04:00

This is why I don't listen to CCM:

(Video found via Andrew Sullivan's Daily Dish)

Buying a trailer...

2009-03-16T22:17:00.004-04:00

When you get married, there's a standard line of questioning you have to answer when people query you about your relationship status.

"When's the big day?" You tell them a date in response. She'll give an exact count of days, hours, and minutes left.

"How's wedding planning going?" they ask, while your eyes glaze over and you start spouting figures from your bloated budget.

"Where are you planning to live?" It's not always the third question, but it's generally in the top five. And it's a valid one.

Sonja and I don't live together. We live in the same town, but she's four miles down the road—close enough where we spend quite a bit of time together. She'll probably eat about half her meals at my place, she has a toothbrush on the sink, slippers in my closet, and my sweatshirts are constantly disappearing as she wears them home at night.

We've talked about where we want to live after the Big Day. Right now, the plan is to stay put. Moving is a pain and there won't be any time to look for a new place in the weeks leading up to the wedding. Afterwards, we're planning to pay off some bills and settle into life without the added hassle of hauling furniture. So, for the foreseeable future, my swinging bachelor pad will become a cozy apartment for two.

With the housing market the way it is, though, we've talked about buying a place. And why not? If you can get a loan, housing prices are way below the place they were just a few years ago. Up here in the Northeast, the market remains above other parts of the country, but it's still weakened quite a bit. It's gotten to the point where buying a place is feasible, even on our not-too-overwhelming income.

So, in my free time (yeah, I do have bits and pieces of that here and there), I've been trolling through Zillow.com. Have you seen the site? It's pretty cool. Basically, it's a real estate listing website. But instead of seeing pictures of homes with addresses, you can actually view available homes in your area by clicking through a Google map. Homes are listed by price and you can sort for your preferred area and cost. Pretty sweet and a great way to kill some time on the weekends.

Zillow lists all kinds of properties: condos, apartments, mansions, vacant plots, big houses, small homes, etc. They have it all... including mobile homes.

That's right, I've been looking through trailer parks for a place to live.

Of course, I haven't been looking with any kind of sincerity. But I won't lie... it has been rather tempting. Did you know, for example, that you can buy a two-bedroom home with a deck right next to a river and pay under $400 a month? Sure, your house will be on wheels and there's always the oft-chance that a tornado will strike your patch of garden gnomes at any second, but $400? That's not much more than I pay for groceries!

(Granted, I like to eat filet mignon covered in gold dust, but still...)

$400 bucks a month! And you can own a house. Yes, the outdoor hot-tub is a caldron placed above a pile of firewood (and it doubles as a possum slow-cooker), but it's still a hot-tub. For $13 a day, you could have the ability to put a gun-rack on your pickup and climb the cinder block stairs with pride to your own doublewide castle. With the money we'd be saving, Sonja and I could take up hobbies like wearing flannel, forgoing shaving, and even figure out how to chew tobacco... or Big League Chew. The possibilities really are endless.

I'm really not considering buying a mobile home. But, for the price, it's probably a better investment than opening another 401k, right?

The Wedding Website...

2009-03-10T09:27:00.002-04:00

Just a quick note, but our wedding website (MichaelandSonja.com) is now live and out of beta-testing—if someone who doesn't know what he's doing can beta-test a website. There are a few more bits and pieces to add (hotel deals, the Target registry, etc.), but that's pretty much as good as it's going to get.

Hope you like it!

Traditional Wedding vs Eloping...

2009-03-09T21:46:00.005-04:00

Planning a traditional wedding:

Set date, announce to family, announce to friends, update Facebook relationship status, take engagement pictures, send save-the-dates.

Buy a dozen wedding planning books, book church, book reception hall, draw up budget, throw up in your mouth at how much a wedding costs, re-draw budget, create guest list, slash guest list.

Pick a maid of honor, pick a best man, pick a flower girl, pick a ring bearer, pick your nose.

Meet with DJs, barter with DJs, book DJ, taste cakes, taste cupcakes, taste fake cakes, book baker, find limos, think about music, hum music, book musician, buy custom-made wedding bands.

Look for dress, try on dress with friends, buy dress, wait for dress to be delivered, make final payment on dress, try on dress once weekly for months.

Have tux custom-made on a whim while traveling overseas, hang tux in closet, never try tux on and hope it fits on the Big Day.

Think about flowers, send guy pictures of flowers at work, dream about flowers, create an assortment of flowers, re-create flowers idea after scrapping for a better one, think about flowers some more, book florist, redesign flower ideas once more.

Book pastor, begin 8-week marriage counseling, drive two hours each Sunday so you can attend church and counseling sessions, confirm that you really were meant for each other after all.

Learn how to dance, how to mix a cocktail, how to build a wedding website, how to throw a bouquet, how to spell distant cousins' names, how to not invite people, how to disinvite people, that "full figure garter belts" exist, that everything is obscenely expensive.

Plan ceremony, plan reception, plan honeymoon, plan backup plans.

Day of - wake up, say "I do," party hearty, ooh-la-la.

Eloping:

Book plane tickets. Get married. Tell mom via postcard.

Traveling to Italy

2009-03-03T21:48:00.004-05:00

I love travel. I love seeing new places, trying new foods and a new language on for size, and finding out how the rest of the world works (and how much we really all do have in common).

I also love all the day to day tasks that go along with travel, too. Packing lists, passports, tickets, itineraries, and planning, planning, planning—it's all good.

Life just seems a lot better when you have a trip to look forward to. I figured that out the first big international trip I took, a mini-grand tour of Europe. When I got back, I promised myself that I'd take another international trip every year. So far, I've been able to keep to that promise. Every year (except 2007, sadly), I went overseas again. It's been a tremendous ride and I've been blessed to take it.

So, when Sonja and I started planning our wedding, we also started planning our honeymoon. We didn't know where we wanted to go at first. We just had some grand plans and schemes, but now it's all coming together and I'm getting a whole load of pre-trip anticipation. We're heading on a two-week honeymoon to Italy.

We booked plane tickets way back in December, before Christmas even, so we could lock in the price (and fly Swiss Air, so I could collect some Star Alliance points to pay for our next trip), then we booked some hotels and travel insurance. Now, we're just playing the waiting game. But, I figured I'd fill you in on the details so you can get pumped up along with us (or offer some travel tips).

We're going to take it slow. It's our honeymoon, right? We want to enjoy it, so we won't be rushing from sight to sight in a half-dozen different cities. We narrowed it down to four nights in Rome, five in Florence, then three in Venice. For the first two cities, we used Bed & Breakfast Italia (thanks to Lonely Planet's suggestion) and then, in Venice, we booked the second-most-romantic hotel in Europe (according to TripAdvisor, anyway).

The plan is to do all the tourist, historical-type visits in Rome, then move on to Florence for a couple days of the same. But can you be in Tuscany and miss the vineyards? No way... we'll have to do a bike tour of some sort. And we're probably going to do at least a day trip to Cinque Terre to hike along the coast and soak in the beauty of the Mediterranean. Finally, we finish off in Venice where the only plan is to get lost in the canals (which hopefully won't be smelly).

Oh sure, there will be more planning the closer we get. The excitement's mounting every day, though. There's a big trip on the horizon and, like I said, that makes everything better about life. Having a tough day at the office? So what, you're taking a trip. Car troubles? Big deal, you're renting a bike overseas. No money? They take credit cards internationally.

I hope this doesn't sound like I'm rubbing it in or anything. I'm just totally pumped for the trip.