Commons had such an impact on me because of the people. The people there came from all walks of life, but all had one thing in common that they were trying to get on a new path. The other great thing about some of these people is that they understood that where they came from was not helping them get to where they wanted to go. This idea made for lively conversation filled with comments and observations about healthy and unhealthy patterns of life. However the beauty of the people at commons is that Ed or sometimes myself just posed questions. We rarely had to give answers and many times I felt like the people gave me more answers than I gave them. It was in these discussions where I saw some amazing epiphanies. Epiphanies filled with insight and determination and positive change. Every week I was excited and encouraged to go back and experience in the growth that was taking place in them and in me. Watching and listening to the people at Commons not only helped strengthen parts of my life, but it gave me a healthier view of different parts of my own life that I had never really thought out before. Their change changed me and because of that I will always be grateful and seek out how I can reenter a similar dialogue with my family, friends and others I meet along the way.

This was an interesting scenario on our block for two reasons.
1. I told our friends that this was an atypical day for us. Intoxicated individuals never stuck around that long or were that apprehensive about us being around.
2. Once we finished using all of the borrowed gardening tools, we returned them to our neighbor, Mrs. Wright. She is a very kind woman and a pillar of the community. Allison and I debriefed with her and towards the end of the convo she grabbed my hand and Al’s hand and told us to circle up. I have not had many opportunities to pray with my neighbors, but the times I have had have been so honest, genuine and moving.

Since that time, I have continued to follow suit and pray for that man. I don’t know why he was drinking or how he hurt himself, but I pray that God gives him the courage to turn away from the bottle that too often plagues many people in my neighborhood (around the world for that matter). Without Mrs. Wright’s guidance I am not sure I would have continued or even started to pray for that man.

I’m currently reading a fascinating book called ‘Sitting at the Feet of Rabbi Jesus’ by Ann Spangler and Lois Tverberg. It’s all about understanding the Gospel message through the eyes and ears of a first century Jew, and I’ve already taken a lot away from it. I came across a quote the other day that sparked a conversation in my mind.

“The question is: Who or what do we want to shape our lives? Even the culture around us will try to ‘disciple’ us if we have not placed ourselves under the transforming influence of Jesus Christ.” p. 63

Several months ago, my roommates and I had a pretty intense discussion about how much of the culture we should be involved in as believers. I’m sure it’s a conversation you’ve had. Should we watch rated R movies, listen to music with questionable content, go to clubs/bars, and so on and what-not.

I think toilet humor is funny. I like Nickelback and Jason Mraz make great music. I think Dane Cook is a silly B. But I just don’t know about all that anymore.

I don’t have the answer, but it is something I struggle with. I think movies like Talladega Nights, and Superbad are hilarious. But they don’t exactly send a healthy message to a kid I might be disciplining (or friends/family members who are not believers) do they? In fact they send several messages that are in direct contradiction to what the Bible teaches, and what we claim to believe. There are bands that I love to listen to, and I think make incredible music…but I run into the same problem. For the first time ever, I found this problem with a book the other day. Within the first three chapters, I realized that I needed to throw it away if I was going be actively fighting an ongoing battle (My roommates literally threw the book in the trash.)

I know that when I watch movies like that, or listen to some of those bands, my thoughts wander where they wouldn’t have if I hadn’t done those things. And I start to sound more like a sailor than a ‘missionary’ when I’m talking. I don’t know if the laugh, or the enjoyment is worth it anymore. It desensitizes me to killing/violence, sex, language, sex, the use of drugs, killing/violence, the plight of the oppressed in the world, killing/violence, sex. I don’t want those things to be as normal to me as a cup of coffee in the morning. I don’t think Christ views them in that way.

But I also don’t want to be That Guy. The Guy Who Is Super-Ultra-Jesusy-And-Pious. Not because I’d be embarrassed if Christ was calling me not to be involved in the culture that way, but because even other believers are annoyed by That Guy, not to mention non-believers. It also would put me way out of the loop. There is something to be said for understanding the culture you are in, but being a current going the other way, it can be a powerful tool in your ministry (Acts 17). After all, we are called to be a counter-culture, not the sub culture we have become.

It’s not always great content, but I like it so I justify it saying that I’m doing strong enough in my walk that it doesn’t matter. If I’m being completely honest (If a bit cheesy) with myself, I wouldn’t watch those movies, listen to that music with, or lend that book to Christ. Although that whole ‘movement’ got kind of worn out several years ago, it holds a valid point. ‘Would you watch this, listen to this, do this, read this with Christ?’ I need to ask myself this question more often.

I’m not saying I’ll be 100% not watching movies like that anymore, or listening to bands I like because of what their content might not be 100% Jesus. But I’, considering it.

What are your opinions? Does those kinds of things bother you? Do you think that we, as believers should not watch those movies, or listen to that music? What do you think it says to the world if we don’t? If we do?

So, friends, every day do something
that won’t compute. Love the Lord.
Love the world. Work for nothing.
Take all that you have and be poor.
Love someone who does not deserve it.

Be joyful
though you have considered all the facts.

From Manifesto: The Mad Farmer Liberation Front
By Wendell Berry

Now that we all know where we will be spending the next year of our lives, it seems like we have all become more anxious (at least I have) for what awaits us in our cities and what God will do in us over the next year. I feel like God has been getting me ready for this for awhile, but now that I’m sending out support letters, talking to different people at church and trying to figure out what I’m going to do with the piles of junk I’ve cumulated over the years it all seems that much more real for me. I’ve been trying to imagine what the hot humid days of Atlanta will be like…..it sounds a little miserable not going to lie. But, I know I’m going to love it. And I know that the relationships made over this next year will be ones forever.

I know however, that NJ will not be like this. Firstly, I won’t already know my housemates and spiritual backgrounds. As of now I know everyone super well and already had a relationship with them before I lived there. I feel like NJ will be super lonely for a while, and pretty overwhelming. I wont be able to go home whenever I like and I feel that the neighborhood will probably not be as safe as Genoa.

Despite all the fears though, I can not wait. It is only 2 months from yesterday til I will be moving in. I am anxious to know who will be living with me and what they are like. I also can’t wait to find out what I will be doing next year. I kinda hope it is something to do with teaching, cause I just love it so much. Whatever God decides though, is good by me :-)

So while I am waiting for this experience I will learn all I can from the Jubilee house, and attempt to live in Jubilation as well. Whatever God has in store for me is sure to be Good, and that is reason enough for celebration.

…Instead, much like Peter saying he would follow Christ to the death, I then denied Him.

Father, forgive me my sins.

My heart is so heavy right now. I am an upbeat person, one that love’s life, and when my heart is heavy I don’t quite function right. So I ask your forgiveness as well while you read this.

Today I was reminded of who I was. Maybe you have a “who I was,” the old self, the one that is gone, the person that was crucified with Christ. Problem is, we have people to remind us who we were. Old friends (as was my case today) who have no idea who we are now, who only see us as we were. For me that image of myself is not Christ like at all. I did a lot of selfish things. I can’t help right now but to think of the Brandon Heath song “I’m Not Who I Was,” maybe you were thinking it too since I had just said that. The song rings very true for me though. I joke with my friends that I have done a 359º turn around. I started as a Christian, went and pursued my own desires, and now am back to loving Christ like I never have. (For those worried about the last degree I’ll get to that in another blog) AND YET, the moment someone from my past shows up I remember how miserably wretched I was. I could barely look them in the eye.

And then I caught it…

It was an attack.

In Waking the Dead, John Eldredge makes the statement that “the story of your life is the story of the long and brutal assault on your heart by the one who knows what you could be and fears it.” The truth is that God has made each one of us in His own image, and Satan wants nothing more than to blind us to that truth.

Myself: Someone I have always intended to someday become. And really, the myself I intend to become is the myself He first created.

Today was a good reminder. I am not myself. I do not reflect Christ’s glory the way I hope too. BUT, I am not who I was either. God has done marvelous work in my life, but I am a work in progress. I’m sure it is due to me that I am not finished, we all have something we just love to hang on to, but I am so much closer to being myself.

Father, thank you for the love you have shown me. Thank you for having the patience to continue working on me. Truly you deserve all praise.
I love you.

*This is a quote from Mark Steele’s book Half-Life/Die Already.

More specifically, they just returned from a mission trip to Kenya, with a group of 9 other people from our church.

I’m still in shock because… My parents went on a mission trip. To a place without air conditioning… where running water isn’t/wasn’t always available. I’m sure that sounds terrible. But I promise, my parents do not strike anyone as the “missionary” types. This could have something to do with their 3000 square foot house. The pool in their backyard. The 4 cars they own. The RV. The plasma TV. The trips to places like Beijing, London, Hong Kong, Ireland, Cancun, Puerto Rico, Honduras, Bermuda… You get the picture.

So I wasn’t surprised when I picked them up from the airport, and the entire 30 minute drive home they started and ended everything with, “they have NOTHING,” and throwing in phrases like, “they know how to worship!”… “They’re so joyful!” “… “When they pray, they really expect things to happen!”

Which brings up a few questions.

First, and most important (at least, I think it’s most important): When did material stuff start getting in the way of our connection with God? And why the heck do we let it?

Second: How is acknowleding the other side of that (Mission Year, anyone?) going to change the way we live?

Third: How far are you willing to go to fix the problems you see? How far SHOULD you go the fix the problem?

Fourth: Are you going to do anything?

I think one of our biggest problems is comfort. People are creatures of comfort, when it comes down to it. And no matter where we may be in life, we get comfortable where we are. We get comfortable with what we have. Then God comes along, and tells us we need to change something. And we’re like, “hey man, back off. I’m perfectly comfortable with complacency.”

Fifth: Is complacency REALLY ok?

Do you think God is ok with our complacency?

I think not. I think if He were, there wouldn’t be missionaries. There wouldn’t even be short-term missions. There probably wouldn’t even be churches, because there would be no one to lead them.
At some point, you have to decide that something is worth moving forward for.
Something is worth changing.
Something is worth YOU changing.