Looking for simple ways to encourage your husband and strengthen your marriage? Sometimes the smallest gestures can make the biggest difference! Whether you want to show your husband more appreciation or inspire your husband in a difficult season, these 53 ideas will help you get started.

5 Simple Ways to Encourage Your Husband Today

Don’t have time to read the full list? Save this post and come back to it! Here’s 5 quick ways to encourage your husband today…

• Text him: “I believe in you” today.
• Thank him for something specific he did this week.
• Pray for one thing on his mind right now.
• Leave a note in his car.
• Plan something he loves this weekend.

Want more ideas? Keep reading for 48 additional ways to inspire and encourage your husband!

There’s an old joke about one of our presidents walking with his wife, who sees one of her old boyfriends in a less-than-glorious occupation. The president looks at the old boyfriend and says, “If you hadn’t married me, you might be married to that guy.”

The first lady answers calmly, “If I had married him, he’d be president.”

Now, occupation is not the measure of a man. But as a wife, you do possess a unique power to inspire your husband!

Your loving vision of the man he’s becoming propels him toward greatness—not necessarily by the world’s yardstick of success, or even your own, but of God’s.

When you believe in him, he is secure. He can take the leaps of faith required to surmount fear. He can bear up under pressure, pioneer new territory.

An inspired husband feels the freedom to reach the fullest potential of the man God has created him to be. He’s not merely encouraged. He’s a man who’s empowered; a conqueror.

If you want to give your man some “wind beneath his wings”… start here.

53 Great Ways to Inspire Your Husband

1. Send him an email at work. Example: “Praying for you today. Thanks for being so courageous in [insert specific area].”

2.  Give him one night on a regular basis to do something he loves.

3.  Initiate great sex.

4.  Consistently mention ways you see him growing to be more like Christ.

5.  Ask him about his “bucket list.”

6.  Give him a book or ticket to learn about something he loves doing.

7.  Ask him about some dreams he has — and pray about them together, evaluating them. Then ask how you can help him go after them.

8.  Text him. Example: “REMINDER: I BELIEVE IN U.”

9. Make sure he feels respected by you.

10.  Leave sticky notes in his lunch, on his steering wheel, in his briefcase, etc. “So proud of all you’ve been doing with ___.” “You are so great with our kids.” “You are my dream come true.” “You are an incredible lover.”

Read this next: Why I Save My Worst Words for My Husband (And Why That Needs to Change)

11.  Suggest that he take some time to go pursue a hobby.

12.  Leave a message on his voicemail: “Thanks for going to work every day to take care of our family. You are so good at what you do.”

13. Ask him how you can pray for him at work. Later on in the week, ask about his prayer requests again.

14. Be proactive about doing something together that he really enjoys: make a date, get him excited, and share his enthusiasm!

15.  Tell him areas he’s gifted in. Don’t stretch the truth; be honest so he can trust you.

16. Pray for him.

17. Initiate great sex.

18.  Start and keep a “Dreams” binder with him. Include some travel brochures or whatever gets you excited. In the back, make sure you have a “Dreams turned reality!” file.

19.  Talk with him about setting aside a small part of the budget to pursue the ways God has created him — through education or through sheer enjoyment.

20.  Post on his social media: “I love being your wife! See me tonight regarding this.”

21. Gently communicate with him about what you like in bed, and respond encouragingly to his attempts.

22.  Remember a dream that he had a long time ago. Talk with him about whether it’s still a dream — and still a possibility.

23.  Ask God to open your eyes to the ways He has made your husband and to give you wisdom about how to maximize that workmanship.

24.  Have your children write him notes or letters about what they love about their dad.

25.  Create intentional intimacy together.

26.  Ban yourself from any nagging, the Great Life-Sucker.

27.  Ask, “If I could do one thing I’m not already doing that would really empower you and inspire you, what would it be?” Listen — resist being defensive (the hard part) — and follow through.

28.  As you think of them, remind him of specific times and areas he has impacted people’s lives: “Hey, I was thinking the other day about all the time you invested in that Cub Scout troop. Wonder what those boys are doing now. It was so cool to watch them grow with you as their leader.” “Our son has grown so much in encouraging people lately. He gets that from you; you are such a good example for him in that.”

29.  Buy him something small to stoke the fires: a journal for a writer; some carpentry pencils for a woodworker; some grilling tools for the master chef. Add a sweet note: “Just because I love the way you’re made.”

30.  Do something fun and unexpected together: paintball; laser tag; on a spring day, have a picnic, blow bubbles, and bring the books you’re reading; swing; go to a drive-in movie, bring popcorn, and instigate a make-out session.

31. Think about a way you’ve been hurting him, annoying him, or not “seeing” him. Apologize, and work hard at showing true change.

32. Initiate great sex.

33. Go to a home improvement store to plan a small, doable project that energizes both of you, even if it’s just painting a room or fixing up some landscaping. (Hint: Make sure it’s something by which he won’t feel burdened.)

34. Do something from his to-do list for him — something that he’d rather have you do anyway.

35. Find a mutually enjoyable activity you like doing together on a regular basis — even if it’s playing the Nintendo together.

36. Create a cheerful atmosphere when he comes home.

37. Design a date night that will help him to de-stress and have fun.

38. Discover his love language and become even more fluent in it.

39.  Pray about and pursue at least one dream of your own, talking with him about it.

40.  What’s hard about his life right now? Pray for his endurance, and encourage him specifically. Galatians 6:9 is a great start for both.

41.  Organize or clean something in your home that you know he finds messy.

42.  Send a snail-mail love note to him at the office, affirming him in his work.

43.  If there’s something on his “Honey Do” list at home that he finds overwhelming or has a hard time finding time to do, talk with him (respectfully and gently) about the possibility of having it hired out. Make sure he knows it’s not because you find him incompetent, but that you want to free him from a burden.

44.  Initiate great sex.

45. Be a student of your husband. Does he feel inspired if he’s got all his ducks in a row? If he’s got a creative space to think? If he feels verbally affirmed?

46. If he’s into dressing nice, go with him to shop for clothes in which he feels confident.

47. Let him overhear you speaking well of him on the phone, among friends, or in public places.

48.  In his area of weakness, pray about how to subtly and gently step in and help him.

49.  Tell him what a great dad he is. Be specific.

50.  If and when he messes up, respond with the kind of grace, compassion, and mercy that God gives us. Respond in a way that communicates, You’re safe with me — and I’m not going to rehash your failures. This is a secure place for you to grow … and I love the journey with you.

51. Laugh together! Watch a funny movie, or go to see your favorite Christian comedian perform.

52. Explore somewhere new. Try a new coffee shop or restaurant or tour the next town over together. Sometimes these moments of exploration can kindle some of the excitement of marriage that often gets lost.

53. Have “Creative Time” together on a date night or after the kids go to bed. Challenge each other to make something, whether it’s a craft or new recipe.

These are 53 simple ways that you can not only inspire your husband, but will also help you to build a deeper connection together. What else would you add to the list?

The post 53 Easy Ways to Inspire Your Husband appeared first on MomLife Today.

It’s that time of year again! Every store you walk into has been invaded by skeletons, bats, witches… and every kind of Disney princess costume that you could possibly imagine.

Many of us are trying to hunt down costumes, sign up for class parties, and make sure our kids don’t indulge in too much candy.

The reality is, Halloween in our culture today has become a whole ordeal. But should it be this way for Christian families?

What does the Bible say about Halloween? Should Christian families go trick or treating? Does God want us to avoid celebrating a holiday that has roots in such a dark history?

Even growing up as a little girl in the church with Christian parents, we still got dressed up every year and went to our church’s Trunk or Treat and to a few neighbors’ houses for candy.

But now that I have young kids of my own, I figured it would be a good time to get to the root of what God actually thinks about trick or treating and Halloween. 

The History of Halloween

Typically when we’re getting our kids dressed up for a fun time of trick or treating, we’re not focusing on evil spirits. But we can’t deny the pagan origins that have been associated with this particular holiday.

You may have heard church people refer to Halloween as the “Devil’s holiday.” But is that really true? What is the actual origin of Halloween?

As far as we know, Halloween first began in Ireland with the ancient Celts hundreds of years ago, who began their new year on November 1. The night before on the evening of October 31, they held a festival that marked the end of the harvest season and the beginning of winter.

They believed this seasonal transition was when the boundary between the living and the dead was blurred and ghosts could walk the earth. (Creepy, right?!)

They would light bonfires and wear costumes in an attempt to hide from the ghosts. And of course they had a big party and tried to tell each other’s fortunes while they were at it. 

When Christianity spread into the area, the church started looking for ways to replace some of these pagan traditions. So in the 8th century, Pope Gregory III declared November 1 to be All Saints’ Day, a day to honor saints and martyrs.

The evening before, October 31, became known as All Hallows’ Eve, was eventually shortened to Halloween.

As Halloween continued to evolve it became what we know it as today, with traditions like trick-or-treating and pumpkin carving, all of which were influenced by different cultures. 

READ THIS NEXT: 31 Fun Ideas for October (Almost all of them are free!)

Now today for so many Christians, we’re left a little befuddled by our relationship to Halloween. Its original history was a pagan holiday rooted in darkness and the occult, but the church made attempts to “turn it for good.”  

So is trick or treating good now? Or is it bad? What does the Bible say about Halloween and trick or treating?

What does the Bible say about Halloween?

There are no passages or Bible verses that specifically address trick or treating or Halloween. But all throughout the Bible, we can find verses that will guide us as Christians in our approach to the celebration of Halloween.

From the topics of light versus darkness to discernment and spiritual warfare, here are 9 verses to consider as we determine how and if we celebrate Halloween. 

1. Ephesians 5:8-11 (NIV) – “For you were once darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light… Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness, but rather expose them.”

The apostle Paul reminds us that any signs of evil and darkness are things that we as believers are commanded to have nothing to do with. As children of the light, everything we do should be seen as an opportunity point others to God.

2. Ephesians 6:11-12 (ESV) “Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil. For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic powers over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.”

There are no doubt that there are evil forces present in the world around us, and the devil will take any opportunity to deceive us, because he is the father of lies. That’s why we and our children have to stay on our guard against anything that can appear to be good but actually are shrouded in spiritual darkness. 

3. 2 Corinthians 10:3-5 (NIV) “For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.”

By claiming the name of Jesus and accepting His gift of eternal life, we turn away from the way the world does things. We have God on our side and the unfruitful works of darkness and evil have nothing on His power.

Knowing this, we measure everything we experience (or celebrate) and make sure it reflects by God’s nature, character and the wisdom He gives us in His Word.

4. 1 Peter 5:8-9 (ESV) “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour. Resist him, firm in your faith, knowing that the same kinds of suffering are being experienced by your brotherhood throughout the world.”

The evils of Halloween and in the world around us do exist. Our job? To be watchful and alert. If anything we take part in doesn’t line up with our faith, we have to recognize it and stand against it.

5. 1 Thessalonians 5:22 (NIV) “Reject every kind of evil.”

Could this be perceived as evil? Could our celebration of halloween be a stumbling block for someone in our lives or community? Is there any aspect of evil in our celebrations? These are all important questions for every Christian family to ask each year.

6. Philippians 4:8 (NIV) “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things.”

These verse is a perfect guideline for us to run every decision that we make through, especially as a family. Is it pure and excellent? Is it true and right?

7. Colossians 3:2 (NIV) “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.”

There’s definitely an obsession or even glorification that I’ve seen happen in our culture over Halloween in recent years, especially in the United States. If you do decide to participate in any Halloween festivities with your family, keep the most important things the most important things.

Church trumps a Halloween party. Family devotions more important than shopping for costumes. Don’t make exceptions to your usual family rhythms and stick to the biblical principles you rely on.

8. Matthew 5:14-16 (NIV) “You are the light of the world. A town built on a hill cannot be hidden. Neither do people light a lamp and put it under a bowl. Instead, they put it on its stand, and it gives light to everyone in the house.”

As a family of believers, you are meant to be a light in dark places! God has equipped you for this! In modern culture, how can your family be in the world but not of it? Engaging while still being a light?

9. Galatians 5:22-23 (NIV) “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”

I’ve come to love applying the concept of the fruit of the spirit to every major decision in our family. (You can find another great post about the fruit of the spirit and parenting right here.) Will the way that we participate in trick or treating and Halloween be loving? Will it be joyful and peaceful? Will it be good and self-controlled?

Each of these verses can help guide your families decisions as you study what the Bible says about trick or treating and Halloween. I’d encourage you to go deeper on each of these passages and continue seeking wisdom and direction as you make decisions for your own family!

Avoiding the appearance of evil

For our household, I’ve decided the best thing that we can do when it comes to trick or treating and Halloween is to be sure that we are avoiding the appearance of evil and instead focusing on being a light everywhere we go.

So for us, right now (and all this may change), that means no creepy jack-o-lanterns or ghosts hanging in our trees. No skeleton costumes or creepy movies about the occult in our household. 

Whether we’re shopping for costumes or deciding whether to attend a school part, Halloween is a time where we have to stay in tune with the Holy Spirit and look to Him for discernment on whether or not each event or celebration is wise for our family. 

For trick or treating, our kids are welcome to dress as princesses, ninjas, dinosaurs, whatever they want to be, as long as it is not in direct opposition to the character, nature or word of God. 

Not sure what God would have your family do this Halloween? I’d encourage you to pray James 1:5…

The spiritual world is very real and I want my kids to realize that even while they’re little, before they become a young adult.

Halloween night can be an opportunity for us to focus on community and fun and even celebrating the gifts of creativity and joy that God has given to us. But even while we do this, we have to stay mindful of this day’s underlying spiritual significance.

I don’t ever want this fun tradition of dressing up and trying to find the best candy to become a spiritual stumbling block for myself or our kids. So I will continue to ask God for wisdom and direction each year on what HE would have us do – and the best ways to avoid the appearance of evil while we do it. 

8 other great Halloween activities for families

At the end of the day, whether or not your family celebrates Halloween and does trick or treating is totally up to you. Based on the scripture I truly believe this is a decision that involves discernment.

No matter what, every holiday is a great opportunity to remind ourselves and point our kids back to our Savior and the one who we live for – Jesus Christ. If you decide to opt to NOT do trick or treating this year, here are some fun family activities that you can do instead!

1. Pumpkin Decorating: Let your kids paint, bedazzle, or add stickers to pumpkins. This an easy way (less messy) way for them to enjoy pumpkins without carving.

2. Fall Nature Scavenger Hunt: Create a list of fall-themed items like acorns, colorful leaves, pinecones, and squirrels. Then have your kids search the backyard or an area park for everything on the list. There are some great options on Pinterest! 

3. Thankfulness Tree: Have kids cut out paper leaves and write something they’re thankful for on each leaf. Attach the leaves to a paper tree on the wall or hang them on an actual branch.

4. Apple Picking & Baking: Visit a local orchard to pick apples. Afterward, scour reciples online to make different kinds of apple snacks, recipes and dips!

5. Hayride or Corn Maze Adventure: Visit a local farm that offers hayrides or corn mazes. It’s a fun outdoor activity that celebrates the harvest season.

6. Fall Baking Party: Organize a day to bake seasonal treats like pumpkin bread, apple muffins, or cinnamon cookies. Let kids help with measuring, mixing, and decorating.

7. Story time and Hot Cocoa: Host a cozy story time with books about fall or harvest. Serve hot cocoa or cider and let your kids camp out in the living room with favorite blankets and pillows.

8. Outdoor Campfire Night: Have a campfire in your backyard or a local park. Tell stories, sing songs, and toast marshmallows to celebrate the cozy aspects of fall.

Each of these ideas can be adapted for different ages and focus celebrating the beauty and joy of the fall season without connecting to Halloween themes. Want a few other creative ideas?

You can find even more great fall activity ideas in this list: 31 Fun Things to Do in October.

In conclusion, I hope this post gives you a clearer idea of what the Bible says about trick or treating and celebrating Halloween. While this day is no longer based around a celtic festival or a pagan practice, we as Christians can’t deny the spiritual nature associated with this day. 

Dear friends, whether or not you decide to celebrate Halloween or trick or treat this year with your kids, remember that wisdom is not focusing and targeting one specific day, but guiding and helping our kids to be a light for Jesus in everyday life, all throughout the year. 

*This post was originally published October 30, 2024

The post What Does the Bible Say About Halloween? A Must-Have Guide for Christian Parents appeared first on MomLife Today.

Need a little Christmas gift help this year that also helps you share the love and hope of Jesus? Check out our Christian Gift Guide for 2026, featuring some of the best faith-based gifts for the guys, gals, and kids in your life!

*This post does contain some affiliate links from which we receive a commission. Any commission income goes directly to support the ministry of MomLife Today.*

The holiday season is right around the corner, and admittedly I’ve already been feeling a little anxious about it.

Don’t get me wrong. Christmas is my absolute favorite season! I love the start of Advent, and having the chance to slow down, reflect and remember the coming of our Savior and the hope that he brings.

But also with the holidays these days, there can come a sense of expectation.

Do we have enough family traditions? Do I have fun holiday things planned for the kids? And most of all… what in the world am I going to buy for everyone??

If gift-giving lately has felt a little more stressful and not as full as heart and meaning as you would like, keep reading.

Christmas gift help is officially here, with heartfelt, meaningful gifts you can share with your loved ones this year. Breathe a sigh of relief, and let’s get ready to celebrate this special season!  

Christian Gifts for Women

Whether it’s your mother, sister, adult daughter or best friend, these Christian gifts for women will help her feel loved and encouraged and bring a smile to her face!

Find even more gift ideas in 34 Christian Mother’s Day Gifts Moms Will Actually Love.

1. A Scripture-Based Devotional Book

Help her start the new year in God’s Word with this 52 week spiral bound Bible, perfect for journaling her way through the Word.

2. A Gorgeous Encouraging Blanket

There’s nothing better than cozying up on the couch or getting ready for bedtime and getting a beautiful dose of encouragement from God’s Word! I love this Blessed Assurance blanket from Worship Wares so much. It’s currently on our bed as we speak, and it makes such a great gift for moms, sisters, friends, coworkers, and more. You can also find more of their hymn blankets right here.

3. Personalized Faith-Inspired Jewelry

This gorgeous birthstone bracelet is a low cost gift option that feels thoughtful and personalized. A great way to wear her faith around her wrist!

4. A Cute, Faith-Centered T-shirt

Elevated Faith has so many wonderful clothing items for women and young adults that she’ll love, like this one… Created By the Creator.

5. A Guided Prayer Journal

Give her the gift of a a beautiful journal for recording prayers, gratitude, and what God is teaching her in the coming year! I love this one that also includes Scripture prompts and guided reflection pages.

6. A Beautiful Journaling Bible

There are so many gorgeous journaling Bibles on the market now that it’s hard to choose just one! Each of these Bibles include ample space for reflection and notes among other great study features to help her build her faith.

Christian Gifts for Men

Your men’s gift guide includes a handful of unique gift ideas that are perfect for husbands, father’s, brothers, pastors and more.

Find more great gift ideas in 60 Easy Father’s Day Ideas and Gifts for Dad.

1. Quick Guided Bible Study Journal

For the busy guy in your life who is short on time but wants to grow in his faith, don’t miss this journal! I love that everyday there is a short scripture and space for prayer and reflection to start (or end) his day on the right foot. As a bonus, it also comes with an optional free app where he can track his reading and progress. Truly a win-win.

2. A Trendy Jacket With a Great Message

Shopping for men can be tough when it comes to clothing! So when you find a great brand that also offers an inspiring message, I’m all in. These Made in the Image of God coats are stylish, practical, and encouraging, and would make such a cool gift for the stylish guy in your life. (Plus it comes in a selection of colors.)

3. A Cool Wall Print or Canvas

Why not give him a reminder of his faith and a brand new piece to decorate with? There’s lots of cool Christian wall art online, but I particular like these that give off a more manly tone and would look great in an office, living room or man cave.

4. Custom Scripture-based Jewelry

Give him a new way to wear his faith! These personalized scripture bracelets from Celebration Gift Shop are really special, even for a guy who doesn’t normally wear jewelry. They’re understated and look masculine, but can be customized with his favorite verse or encouragement straight from God’s Word that he can carry with him.

5. A Stylish Hat That Shares Your Faith

For the hat-wearer in your life, there are so many great faith-based hat options to add to his collection! Malta Apparel has an excellent collection of Christian hats and clothing for guys that are just as stylish as they are encouraging and inspiring. This YHWH hat is definitely a favorite!

Children’s Gift Ideas

Show the kids in your life just how much fun it can be to follow Jesus! We’ve included some children’s gift ideas great for kids up to 12.

Find even more in our Ultimate Guide to Christian Gifts for Kids!

1. A Children’s Storybook Bible

There are plenty of excellent children’s bibles on the market, but there’s one new one that’s really standing out for me as a mom of elementary-age kids. The Discovery Bible contains the full Bible text in the NLT translation. But through the use of a larger font, illustrations and plenty of infographics, study notes and more, this becomes an easy-to-read first “real” Bible, ideal for kids anywhere from 7-13 years old. I recently did a full walkthrough of the Bible that you can check out here!

Sponsored Feature: This is a sponsored inclusion in our Christmas Gift Guide, but all opinions are our own!

Whether you’re cuddled up for bedtime reading, doing family devotions or sharing with a Sunday school class, The Biggest Story Bible Storybook is such a great pick. Perfect for younger & older kids alike, this Bible has captivating illustrations, and 104 Bible stories written in a style that kids will actually get.

2. Kids Christian Affirmation Cards

One of the best things we can do for our kids is instill them with God’s promises and His piece. I love this affirmation cards for that very reason! You can give one to each of your kids on the go, read them in the morning as a family, or share and memorize them anytime. These are great way to keep your kids (and yourself!) encouraged on the daily.

3. A Bible-themed Playset

Looking for a great Christian gift for a little one? There are so many wonderful toys that bring faith into the playroom! I especially love this Noah’s Ark Play Set with animals included. It provides a chance to talk about the Bible and God’s faithfulness, and makes a perfect gift for Christmas, baby showers, birthdays and so much more.

4. A Bible-Centered Coloring or Activity Book

Whether you’re on the go or doing a no-screen day, it’s always a great idea to have an activity book on hand for kids! Beginner’s Bible has a collection of great activity books centered around the characters and stories from the Beginner’s Bible, and this one is a great place to start! Perfect for kids ages 3-7.

5. Christian Clothing for Kids

There is no shortage of adorable Christian clothing for the kids on line, all the way up from babies to teens! Here are a few favorites including a baby two-piece set, an adorable sweater for girls, and a hoodie even the coolest of pre-teen boys would like.

Gift Ideas for an Unbeliever

Is there someone in your life that you’d like to encourage and share Jesus with? Here are a few great gift ideas for an unbeliever.

1. An Easy-to-Read Book About Christianity

If you have someone in your life who has been curious or asked questions about your faith and what you believe and why, a thought-provoking book can make a great gift to continue the conversation! Lee Strobel and C.S. Lewis are both great authors to point them to with The Case for Christ or Mere Christianity being a great choice. (Bonus: The Case for Christ has a version for kids, too!)

2. An Encouraging Gift Basket

Have a co-worker, friend or neighbor who might need some encouragement? I love that this gift basket includes a candle, journal, cozy socks and more alongside encouraging scripture cards and notes about God’s love for her. Add a personalized note and it can be a great way to share with an unbeliever in your life!

3. The Gift of an Invitation

This last gift idea is one that you can’t buy at a store. Instead of wrapping a gift, why not invite someone in your life to an experience? Invite them to eat a great local restaurant, with dinner on you.

Have them over for dinner and dessert with your family. Invite them to a conference or event happening at your church! Sometimes the best gift that we can give to an unbeliever is our time and attention, to help show them just how loved by God they are.

I hope this Christian gift guide gives you some great ideas for Christmas this year and beyond! Which of these items are you planning to add to your Christmas lists?

The post Christian Gift Guide 2026: The Best Christ-Centered Christmas Gifts appeared first on MomLife Today.

Have you ever not known if something was right or wrong? Or stopped to wonder how we even know what right is?

The importance of knowing came home to me when I took our grandchildren bowling. As the electronic scoreboard tallied each of our scores, Logan, our oldest grandson, asked how strikes and spares are tallied. It had been a long time since I’d kept a bowling score and couldn’t remember. Logan looked at the scoreboard and concluded, “It’s scoring it right.” Then he paused, looked at me, and said, “but we don’t know what right is.” 

We Don’t Know What Right Is

Logan’s words struck a chord in my soul. I knew his words were more true than he realized and could be said about more than bowling. “We don’t know what right is” could be echoed in homes across our nation and world. Many have never heard of Jesus or been exposed to Biblical truth. 

What Is Right? Start With the Ten Commandments

If you’re reading this, you know where we find truth: in the Bible. For instance, the Ten Commandments (Exodus 20:1-17) tell us what is right.  

It is right to honor God above all. It is wrong to put other things or people before Him. It is wrong to take God’s name in vain.  It is right to take time during the week to rest from work and worship God.  It is right to honor our fathers and mothers. It is wrong to dishonor them. It is wrong to take another person’s life. It is wrong to commit adultery. It is wrong to steal. It is wrong to lie. It is right to tell the truth. It is wrong to covet what others have.

Not Everyone Knows What is Right 

My husband is a state district judge. Many who stand before him were raised in homes where right and wrong were not taught, modeled, or enforced. There is an increase in Biblical ignorance. Therefore people do “what is right in their own eyes.”

If daddy beat mother, then son is likely to beat his wife. If mom lies and steals, then the child has that as a pattern for their life. If parents do drugs, why would a child not use drugs? A case in point is one day, Keith had before him three generations of a family in jail – grandmother, mother, grandchild. 

Read this next: How to Teach Kids Discernment Without Teaching Them to Judge

What does the Bible say about right and wrong?

Logan’s comment is a chilling statement if we think about it. Even in Christian homes, are we making sure our children know what right is beyond the Ten Commandments? Do we know what “right” is? What is right can be found in God’s Word.

• Are we teaching our children Jesus’s Sermon on the Mount? (Matthew 5-7)
• Are we teaching them to not sin when they’re angry? (Ephesians 4:26)
• Are we teaching them to be kind to one another, tender-hearted? (Ephesians 4:32)
• Are we teaching them that it is right to forgive and wrong to be unforgiving? (Matthew 18:21-22)
• Are we teaching our children to pray instead of worry? (Philippians 4:6)
• Are we teaching them that the Holy Spirit is a gift and we’re to walk by the Spirit? (John 14:16, Galatians 5:16)
• Are we teaching them the difference in the fruit of the Spirit and the deeds of our fleshly nature? (Galatians 5:19-25)

When our children grow up and face difficulties in relationships or at work will they know how to deal with them or will they say, “but I don’t know what is right.”

The Gift of Teaching Children Right from Wrong

God’s ways are higher than our ways. (Isaiah 55:8-9) If we are wise, we will teach our children what “right” is according to Him. That way, when they leave our home and are in relationships, they can look at situations and instead of saying, “I don’t know what is right,” they will be equipped to say, “I know what it is right to do.”

Will we give them the gift of knowing what is right? 

Heavenly Father, thank You for giving us the Bible that shows us the right way to live. Inflame our hearts with passion to teach our children what is right.

*This post was originally published September 30, 2019 here on MomLife today.

The post How Do We Know What “Right” Is? appeared first on MomLife Today.

Let’s say you’re on a playdate, and another child offers a colorful presentation of precisely how not to behave. The parent is busy in conversation.

Do you…

a. Make sure on the way home, that your child knows how appalling you find this behavior, and how proud you are that your child would never do something like that.

b. Hand the errant child a cup of goldfish to stop the madness. Flash the oblivious parent a wide smile so he or she will feel accepted no matter what.

c. Ignore it. Your kids know better, and we certainly don’t want to raise little finger-pointers.

d. None of the above.

It’s a dilemma we each face on a regular basis, right?

When a woman walks down the street in an outfit displaying a generous portion of her birthday suit; when another child uses language that might be more appropriate for late-night cable; when something pops up on a commercial that you wish your kids hadn’t just witnessed on prime time.

How do we help our kids know how to react—and still not raise a bunch of mini-Pharisees?

Teaching Kids to Say Yes to Discernment Without Judging Others

How to Explain Discernment to a Child

First, it’s important to draw a line between “judging” and “discerning.” What’s the difference? In a couple of words, humility and love.

Judging carries with it condemnation, and separation from its subject; it becomes an “us/them” comparison, a superior-to-inferior attitude. Judging places someone beneath us because of some factor, often with remarkable subtlety.

It loses perspective of who we are in the sight of God—namely, sinners saved by grace, who are nothing without the cross making us new every day in God’s mercy.

Discernment, on the other hand, does recognize a behavior as wrong—but does so out of a realization of our hearts’ own constant and replete struggle with sin. It shows compassion toward its object, still hating evil and clinging to good as God does.

After all, justice is an indispensable ingredient of love, which craves the best for the one it loves. We wouldn’t want a medical doctor to pretend a sick person doesn’t have a problem. And we don’t want to do that with souls and hearts, either.

Discernment remembers,

“What do you have that you did not receive? And if you did receive it, why do you boast as though you did not?” (1 Corinthians 4:7).

It says, “There, but for the grace of God, go I.” It’s that place that lays down the stone we were about to throw, but still prays and cares that someone would “Go, and sin no more.”

Remember that the opposite of Pharisee-ism is the gospel. Martin Luther famously wrote that we should preach the gospel to ourselves every day. Jesus himself praised the prayer, “Have mercy on me, a sinner.”

Keeping our need for Jesus before us—as well as God’s richness in our life because of Him, rather than our own efforts—is a must.

How to Teach Kids Discernment

So what does this look like practically, as we work to help our kids carefully separate good from evil—but not develop hearts that condemn others?

1. We need to be upfront about our own sin and failures—and God’s forgiveness.

Talking openly with our kids about our own need for Jesus creates an environment where grace trumps performance. We acknowledge that only because of God are we champions over sin. Discernment and hatred of evil start in our own hearts!

2. We need to ask our kids for forgiveness quickly, humbly, sincerely, and without excuse when we sin against them.

3. We should talk frequently about what we see, watch, listen to, and read.

Scripture talks about having our “powers of discernment trained by constant practice to distinguish good from evil” (Hebrews 5:14). Seize discussion opportunities to show your kids vividly how Scripture is applicable to every facet of life—perfect for “training in righteousness, that the man of God may be complete, equipped for every good work” (see 2 Timothy 3:16-17).

Ask them what they think: What does the Word look like at the movies? In that situation with your child’s friend? In a decision you’re trying to make? When someone has gossiped about you? When you’ve royally screwed up?

4. Allow the gospel to play in to your comments about others.

Press your conversation through the sieve of grace, removing even the smallest fragments of condemnation. It’s a good thing to talk with our kids about wrong behavior that we see in others—to talk about God’s commands “when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.”

It’s also imperative that we emphasize our own need for grace and mercy, not our own superiority for our moral choices! When you see someone’s sin, you might occasionally compare it to your own: “It’s kind of like the way I continue to struggle with being angry, or the way we’ve been working together on your obedience lately.”

Tone of voice is capital here. Will kids hear a hint of disdain for “people like that,” or honesty and humility?

5. In discipline, focus even more on the heart than on behavior modification.

This helps draw a dotted line between our own sin and our need for God’s grace. It also teaches that discernment can get a lot of practice in our own hearts! Rather than training my kids like Pavlov’s dogs to “just behave!”, I can ask questions that help them to increase their heart awareness.

Author Ginger Plowman suggests asking children about their hearts—whether, for example, they’re having self-control or are overreacting; whether they’re being unloving or loving; whether they are lying or being truthful.

Then you might ask your kids what they think God’s Word says about this—what behavior and heart attitude they should “put off” in this situation, and what they should “put on.” When appropriate, pray with and for your child and his or her heart.

(Plowman’s Wise Words for Moms is an affordable, calendar-style resource with handy Scripture references categorized by behavior.)

6. Ask good questions.

• “So what do you think about that?”
• “What do you think the Bible says about that?”
• “So why might that person have made that decision? What do you think he might have wanted inside that made him act like that?”

Help kids to see how our legitimate desires can become demands which we then meet in illegitimate, sinful ways. Without implying that these are excuses for wrongdoing, speak compassionately about the factors that can influence others’ behavior.

Then kids can develop soft hearts of gratitude, patience, and understanding toward people who’ve received different grace than they: in their homes, their education, their opportunities, and their experiences.

7. Talk about what we don’t know—and acknowledge that God alone is judge of the heart!

When your kids talk about others’ misdeeds, we don’t need to speak firmly about things we don’t know. (For example: “That girl just doesn’t respect her body.” “Those kids haven’t been taught how to respect adults”) Blanket statements don’t help us to see individuals and love them.

8. When praising your kids, praise heart attitudes far more than behavior.

Again, this places the emphasis on cleanness on the inside and God’s grace to get there, rather than on appearances, shame, and evading people’s disapproval.

How have you talked with your kids about discernment? We’d love to hear about it in the comments!

Editor’s Note: 8 Ideas to Teach Our Kids to Say “Yes” to Discernment … and “No” to Judging Others was first published on MomLife Today on May 28, 2014.

The post How to Teach Kids Discernment Without Teaching Them to Judge appeared first on MomLife Today.

{Editor’s Note: This is Part 3 of Jennifer’s series, where previously she shares her personal struggle with negative thinking (Part 1), rejection (Part 2) and here, her struggle with insecurity. We hope Jennifer’s willingness to share candidly about her personal struggles will help you and/or someone you love who struggles. God is a God of redemption and He is able.}

Insecurity…

For the past several years I’ve been helping to teach and lead Bible studies at my church. Though I said no for a couple years before reluctantly agreeing, I have really enjoyed it. I love to communicate my heart for Jesus and to tell others my stories of how Jesus has changed me and showed me more of him.

We have another teacher at our church. She’s adorable—petite, thin, lovely blond hair, and super smart. In many ways she has always seemed so capable. When she gets up to teach, it’s like attending a seminary class. She’s a dear friend, but I’ve struggled to not compare.

When she had her fourth baby and had to increase her work hours as a nurse practitioner in a clinic for disadvantaged women (did I tell you she was awesome?!), I took over most of the teaching responsibility and found my niche.

After about four years, she finally felt ready to come back. I was thankful, although a bit worried. Would the church ask me to teach anymore? Would others be so glad to have her back, they’d want to shove me out the door?

Last spring as our current study drew to a close, I announced that our other teacher would be returning to teach the summer and fall studies. I can’t tell you how many women came up to me, gushing over their excitement.

They said things like:

• She’s so amazing!
• I just love her classes!
• We can’t wait until she comes back! We always learn so much.
• And a couple people just grinned like I’d handed out free chocolate.

Um…wow. I felt GREAT—I mean, the opposite of great. Can anyone relate? Inside, each comment felt like a dig toward me. When someone said she was a good teacher, it felt like they were indirectly saying I wasn’t. The song in my heart became one of failure and hurt.

Overcoming Negative Thinking, Rejection And Insecurity

How Negative Thinking and Insecurity Are Connected

Some of this relates back to Part 1 and Part 2 in this series about negative thinking and rejection, and I think negative thinking, rejection, and insecurity all kind of lump together like a mud pie complete with rocks and bits of grass.

As far as insecurity goes, I could have told ten thousand stories to demonstrate my struggle with it. For as long as I can remember, insecurity has nipped at my heels (and bitten me on the rear).

I’m not entirely sure where it came from. In Beth Moore’s book So Long Insecurity, she lists out some possible roots of insecurity,

Perhaps my biggest root is my natural predisposition to worry and be sensitive. I’m highly intuitive and feel deeply. In fact, many of my memories are rooted in feelings rather than events. My sharpest memories are often the ones that resulted in my feeling ashamed or embarrassed.

Whatever the root, I’ve subconsciously tried many different techniques over the years to cover this insecurity. In my youth and early twenties I attached to overly controlling friends and tried to compensate for my insecurity by seeking security in relationships with boys.

In my mid-twenties and into my thirties, I sought perfectionism as a cure for my insecurity. My subconscious seemed to reason that if I could ACT good enough, then maybe I’d FEEL good enough.

I’ve since come to realize that perfection is the mask so many of us wear on to cover up what is really a deep root of insecurity. Like kids playing dress up, we use this mask of perfection like body armor, trying to protect ourselves and prove to the world (and really, to ourselves) that we are good enough.

Insecurity has come out in other ways in my life too. I worry that since I don’t look like a magazine model or a fitness instructor, that I must not be attractive to my husband. I’ve resisted inviting people over to my house because I didn’t want them to reject me because it wasn’t perfect. I’ve overcleaned my house for the same reasons.

Just writing this makes me exhausted!

Read this next: 28 Bible Quotes About Confidence and Courage for When You’re Feeling Insecure

In some ways, having a child with special needs has helped me overcome some of this. I can no longer pretend my little corner of the world has any perfection because it’s usually a big mess (as I’ve mentioned over the years in MomLife posts).

My daughter with her autism, OCD, IDD, and severe language impairment, has her own way of organizing the world. That means hanging things like grubby Kleenex in her closet and having a tantrum when she finds I’ve again thrown them away. And she ALWAYS notices. She thinks things like seams and tags on clothes are wrong, wrong, wrong. Not just her clothes.

ALL the clothes and sheets and towels and even underwear in the house. So she rips them out. That means most of our clothes, including my husband’s work shirts, wind up with holes in them. I could go on, but you get the idea.

I can’t even remotely pretend to have it all together. In fact, I wouldn’t know IT if it landed in my lap.

But I still have some roots of that old insecurity that I’m working to dig out.

As I’m preparing to start a new Bible study series at my church (and to once again follow in the footsteps of my amazing Bible study teaching friend), I’ve been watching Beth Moore’s Entrusted videos. (I promise, I do read other teachers. These just happened to beautifully build on the same concept).

In her Entrusted video series, Beth talks about our “always beens.”

I have “always been” insecure. I’ve never not struggled with it. Have you ever felt that way? Maybe it’s not insecurity, but do you have a struggle you feel like will always be there?

As I’m learning with my own struggle toward insecurity, our “always has been” don’t have to be our “always will be.”

There is freedom. Can I get an amen?

Overcoming Negative Thinking and Insecurity With God’s Help

One of my childhood acquaintances developed a cocaine habit in his late teens. I didn’t see him for several years, but ran into him late in my college years. He was applying to enter seminary and writing Bible studies!

His story is one of beautiful victory. God got a hold of him through a series of events (including the fervent prayers of his sister and her Bible study group—prayer is important and powerful!).

I hope to never forget the excitement on his face when he told me the story of his encounter with Jesus. He basically said when he came to his senses and had a moment of clarity, he didn’t just walk to God. He ran to him. It was hard work—constantly turning to scripture and prayer. But God changed him in a deep, miraculous way.

God can change us too. There is a song by Jeremy Camp called Same Power that I’m listening to as I write. If we are in Christ, the same power that moves mountains lives in us. We do not serve a wimpy or half-hearted God.

We serve the one and only true God who breathed all creation into existence. He always has been, and always will be. He is all-powerful, all-knowing, and everywhere all at once.

The marvels in the night sky—stars so huge the earth would not even register as a speck of dust in comparison—all those were created from the breath of God. The same God who took a dead man and raised him from the dead and promises us that through his sacrifice all our sins would be forgiven.

This same all-powerful, all-knowing God, the God of all wisdom, cares deeply and infinitely for us. And he can (and will) change us.

Rethinking Our Position

One of the best ways to retrain your brain and put a new song in your heart is by delving into scripture.

“All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness so that the servant of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.” – 2 Timothy 3:16-17

Entire sermons could be preached on the few words in that verse. What I want to stress to you is that God has called you to him. He is always calling us into relationship with him. And he’s given us his word to help us know him. That Word, His Word, is alive. It changes us. God’s Word has the power to change us. God will equip us for every good work he has planned for us. He will put a new song in our hearts—his song. He has given us his Word.

When negative or insecure thoughts or feelings of rejection chase after you like rabid junk yard dogs: “You’re not good enough, that person hurt you, you should be angry, you should feel so alone, that person’s opinion defines you…” join me and utter a loud NOPE and then search for a scripture to back it up.

I’ve been working on that in my own life.

When I started feeling insecure about the Bible study teacher mentioned above, I thought, “That’s in God’s hands.” I thanked God for her gifts, and thanked God for my gifts. I thanked God that our gifts were unique and from Him.

“For we are God’s handiwork, created in Christ Jesus for the purpose of good works, which Christ prepared in advance for us to do.” – Ephesians 2:10

We are daughters of God. His precious princesses. Everyone doesn’t have to like us or approve of us (although that’s not a free pass to be unkind). We don’t have to please everyone. We can’t worry about what they are thinking, and WE DON’T HAVE TO!

What freedom that brings. Our worth is determined by God, not by what someone else thinks of us. The song I keep trying to rewrite in my heart is that God loves us, He will change us, and we only have to worry about him—and he gives grace! That is the song we need in our hearts, the song that will change us from the inside out.

3 Biblical Steps for Overcoming Negative Thinking

Are you familiar with the “stop, drop, and roll” saying about fire? We can apply the same thing to these battles with insecurity and “I’m not good enough” thoughts. We have to…

Stop: “…Take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.” 2 Cor 10:5 (NIV)

Drop some thanks: “Don’t fret or worry. Instead of worrying, pray. Let petitions and praises shape your worries into prayers, letting God know your concerns. Before you know it, a sense of God’s wholeness, everything coming together for good, will come and settle you down. It’s wonderful what happens when Christ displaces worry at the center of your life.” Phil 4:6-7 (Msg) (Since many of us are quite familiar with this verse, I chose the Message version to give it a fresh perspective for our hearts.)

Roll over our old thoughts with God’s word: “Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly…” Col 3:16 (NIV)

So, don’t worry if you walk past me or drive next to me and hear a loud NOPE. That’s just me, stop, drop, and rolling my insecurity to the curb and putting a new song in my heart.

“He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the LORD and put their trust in him.” – Psalm 40:1-3

Bible Verses for Overcoming Negative Thinking and Insecurity

Here are some other verses I have used when I’m feeling insecure and trying to put a new song in my heart:

When I feel alone, I remember God is with me.

Psalm 23:4 “Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil for you are with me.”

Psalm 28:7 “The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.”

Psalm 91:2 “I will say of the Lord, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”

Isaiah 41:10 “So do not fear for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”

When I feel weak, God is my strength.

Psalm 18:2 “The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my deliverer, my God is my rock, in whom I take refuge, my shield and the horn of my salvation, my stronghold.”

*This post was originally published September 25, 2020.

The post Overcoming Negative Thinking, Rejection And Insecurity – Part 3 appeared first on MomLife Today.

One of the main things I struggle with is knowing the will of God for my life.

When the decision is between right and wrong it’s not hard to know the answer. But when there are several good options or when the future is cloudy and I’m confused and frustrated, it is harder to discern the will of God.

Some time ago my husband came up with 10 questions to consider when trying to discern the will of God. They have helped me and I hope they will be helpful to you as well.

Questions to Ask When Searching for the Will of God

1. Am I in a right relationship with God?

 If there is unconfessed sin in my life, it is a barrier between God and me. Our fellowship is broken. See Psalm 32:1-6, 66:18-20.

2. Do I want to know and do God’s will? 

Jesus says that whoever is willing to do what God wants will know what it is. See John 7:17.

3. Have I asked God for wisdom? 

God promises us sound judgment, but we must ask and keep on asking. See James 1:5 and 2 Timothy 1:7.

4. Does the Bible speak to this decision in any way? 

Some decisions have been clearly addressed in Scripture. God does not lead contrary to what He has already said in His Word.

5. Have I assembled and studied all the facts? 

It is wise to list the pros and cons and ask, “What obligations do I already have that I must keep?”

6. Do I have deep inner conviction and peace about this? 

Do I have peace and conviction about what is right? Paul says, “Anything which does not arise from conviction is sin.” See Romans 14:23 and Philippians 4:6-7.

Sometimes we must pray and fast regularly about a question before we receive peace from the Holy Spirit. God’s peace is deeper than the acceptance given by a casual world.

7. Have I sought the advice of mature believers who know me well?

Others will not always be right, but if three or four mature believers agree, their opinions must be seriously considered. Always ask others to pray for you as well as advise you.

8. Will this help me to better love God and my neighbor? 

This is the most important goal in life. If something hinders this goal, we must carefully examine the problem. See Matthew 22:37-39.

9. Is this my decision to make? 

I may be worrying about something that will eventually be decided by someone else.

10. Do I have to decide now or can it wait? 

Often we worry needlessly about decisions that are not really pressing. Sometimes they go away.

Sometimes when I ask God for guidance, He doesn’t answer immediately. Often I’m not yet ready for the answer. I need to stop struggling to know His will and simply seek to know Him.

In His time and in His way He will reveal His will to me. My primary job is simply to get to know Him better, to open my heart to whatever He would teach me in a time of waiting.

Key Bible Verses About the Will of God

Here are some key scriptures from God’s Word specifically on God’s will and how you can discern the will of God for your own life. 

1. James 1:5 – “If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.” 

2. Proverbs 3:5-6 – “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.”

3. Romans 12:2 – “Do not conform to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God’s will is—his good, pleasing and perfect will.

4. Psalm 32:8 – “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.”

5. Matthew 6:31-33 – “So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well.”

6. 1 Thessalonians 5:16–18 – “Rejoice always, pray continually, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.”

7. 1 Corinthians 10:31 – “So whether you eat or drink or whatever you do, do it all for the glory of God.”

8. Psalm 119:105 – “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”

Meditate on these verses from God’s Word, prioritize prayer, and trust that God is using the waiting and the unknowns to draw you closer to Him. 

Read These Next:  

How to Know When God is Bringing You Into a New Season

Disappointed? Don’t Be God Has a Plan

Fear Is Not My Future: Trusting God Through Anxiety and Motherhood

Editor’s note: 10 Questions to Ask When Trying to Discern the Will of God was first published by Susan Yates here on MomLife Today on February 27, 2015.

The post 10 Questions to Ask When Trying to Discern the Will of God appeared first on MomLife Today.

No one plans to become a single mom.

Whether your divorce was expected or completely blindsided you, the reality of rebuilding your life while raising children can feel overwhelming.

Along with the emotional weight of the divorce itself, you’re suddenly responsible for making decisions, managing finances, creating new routines, and helping your children navigate a life that looks very different than the one you imagined.

The good news? Divorce doesn’t have to define the rest of your story.

While I never wanted to become a single mom, this season has taught me that God can restore what feels broken. Healing doesn’t happen overnight, but it does happen.

If you’re wondering where to begin, here are a few things that helped me move from simply surviving single motherhood to truly living again.

How to Navigate Single Motherhood After Divorce

1. Allow Yourself to Grieve

Single motherhood isn’t something anyone plans for. It’s okay to mourn the life you thought you would have.

Grief isn’t a sign of weakness or a lack of faith. It’s a natural response to loss. Give yourself permission to feel the emotions instead of rushing past them. Healing begins when we acknowledge our pain and bring it before God.

You don’t have to have all the answers today. You simply have to take the next step.

Read this next: How to Thrive as a Christian Single Parent

2. Remember That Your Identity Is in Christ

Divorce has a way of making us question our worth.

You may wonder if you failed, if you’ll ever be enough, or if you’ll ever feel whole again. But your identity has never been rooted in your relationship status. It has always been rooted in who God says you are – not in single motherhood, not in what you’ve lost..

You are still loved.
You are still chosen.
You are still called.
You are still worthy.

Nothing about your circumstances changes God’s view of you.

3. Rediscover the Woman God Created You to Be

Many women spend years pouring into their marriage, their children, and everyone around them. Somewhere along the way, it’s easy to lose sight of yourself.

Instead of asking, ‘Who was I before marriage?’ begin asking, ‘Who is God calling me to become through single motherhood?”

For me, that meant investing in my health, pursuing my passion for wellness, becoming certified as a Biblical Life Coach, training as a Pilates instructor, and building a business that aligns with the gifts God has given me.

Your journey may look different, but the goal is the same: discover the woman God created you to be, not the version shaped by your circumstances.

4. Create Stability One Step at a Time

When life feels chaotic, small routines create peace. Single motherhood can feel unpredictable, but small routines bring stability back.

Focus on the things you can control:

• Establish simple daily rhythms.
• Create a realistic budget.
• Prioritize your physical and mental health.
• Ask for help when you need it.
• Celebrate small victories.

Healing isn’t built through one giant breakthrough. It’s built through consistent, faithful steps.

5. Let Your Children See Hope in Single Motherhood

As moms, we often feel pressure to hide our struggles.

While children don’t need to carry adult burdens, they do benefit from seeing resilience. Let them see you pray. Let them see you trust God. Let them see you rebuild.

One of the greatest gifts we can give our children is the example of a parent who chooses faith over fear.

6. Believe That Restoration Is Possible

Restoration doesn’t always mean getting back what was lost. Sometimes it means receiving something even greater. Single motherhood doesn’t have to be the end of your story — it can be the start of something restored.

Over time, I’ve watched God restore my peace, my confidence, my purpose, and my joy. He has provided in ways I never expected and opened doors I never would have walked through if my life had stayed the same.

The enemy may have intended this season to leave you feeling defeated, but God is in the business of redemption. He can take what was meant for harm and use it for your good and His glory.

Read this next: Someone I Love Is Divorcing—What Should I Do?

Final Thoughts

If you’re newly divorced or adjusting to single motherhood, know that you don’t have to have everything figured out today.

Start with one step.

Give yourself grace.
Lean into God.
Accept help when it’s offered.
Take care of yourself without feeling guilty.
Trust that even if your story looks different than you planned, it can still be beautiful.

“I will restore to you the years that the swarming locust has eaten.” — Joel 2:25

The post What to Do When You Find Yourself Divorced and Navigating Single Motherhood appeared first on MomLife Today.

If you’re wondering how to parent grown children well, you’re not alone — when my children were little, everybody had an opinion about what was coming next.

“Just wait until the terrible twos.”

Then it became, “Middle school changes everything.”

Not long after that, people started warning me about teaching teenagers how to drive. Apparently, that was supposed to be the season that would test my patience, my prayer life, and my blood pressure all at the same time.

Every stage of parenting seemed to come with its own cautionary tale.

But you know what nobody really prepares you for?

Parenting adult children.

Nobody tells you that one day your house might be full again after you thought you were headed toward empty nesting. Nobody tells you how strange it feels to have grown adults eating your groceries, asking for advice they may or may not take, and somehow still expecting you to know where their phone charger is. 

It’s a season that can leave you wondering, “Am I helping or am I making this worse?”

The reality is that life is different from what it was a generation ago. Housing costs are higher, careers often take longer to establish, and many young adults are navigating challenges that previous generations simply didn’t face in quite the same way. Wanting to support our children through those realities isn’t a weakness. In many cases, it’s a gift.

As parents, we all want to be available when our children need us. We want to provide wisdom, encouragement, and support. At the same time, we don’t want to create a situation where they become dependent on us instead of developing the confidence to stand on their own.

Read this next: How to Bless Your Young Adult Children

Finding that balance is an important part of learning to parent grown children with grace, and it isn’t always easy. I have found that it begins with three important steps.

3 Steps to Parent Grown Children with Grace

Step #1: Shift from Parenting to Coaching

One of the biggest adjustments we have to make is realizing that our role changes as our children grow. Proverbs 22:6 tells us to “Train up a child in the way they should go, and when they are old they will not depart from it.” Notice what the verse doesn’t say. It doesn’t tell us to control our children forever. It tells us to train them. 

Training has a purpose, and training has a season. When our children are young, we teach them right from wrong, show them how to solve problems, correct them when they need correction, and stay close enough to guide nearly every decision they make. That’s exactly what children need. But adulthood requires something different.

I like to think of it this way: a coach doesn’t run onto the field and play the game for the team. The coach watches carefully, offers instruction, points out what the players can’t see for themselves, and reminds them of everything they’ve already practiced. The coach is fully engaged without taking over. That picture has helped me tremendously as I’ve learned to parent adult children.

Instead of immediately solving every problem, I’ve had to learn to ask better questions like, “What’s your plan?” or “Have you thought about what that decision might mean six months from now?” Those kinds of questions invite them to think instead of simply depending on me to think for them.

Step #2: Support Without Becoming the Solution

Helping and rescuing are not the same thing. Helping moves our children toward independence. Rescuing often keeps them dependent. This is exactly where so many of us get stuck when we try to parent grown children with love and boundaries at the same time.

I learned that lesson firsthand in my twenties after making a financial decision I wish I could take back. I borrowed money on a credit card to invest in the stock market. At first, everything seemed to be working, and I convinced myself I had figured something out. Then the market turned, and before long I had lost thousands of dollars that I didn’t have to lose.

When I told my dad what had happened, he didn’t jump in with a quick fix. Instead, he asked me what my plan was. After I explained the steps I was taking to pay off the debt, he found a way to encourage my progress rather than eliminate my responsibility.

Looking back, I’m so grateful he responded that way because he wasn’t just helping me pay off a credit card. He was teaching me how to become financially responsible. Had he simply written a check, my debt would have disappeared, but the lesson probably wouldn’t have stayed with me.

Sometimes the most loving thing we can do for our adult children is resist the temptation to make life easier when what they really need is the opportunity to become stronger.

Ephesians 6:4 reminds us, “Do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord.”

We aren’t called to exasperate our children by controlling every decision they make. Neither are we called to step back completely. We are called to continue offering loving instruction and wisdom in ways that point them toward maturity rather than dependence. 

Step #3: Set Boundaries That Strengthen the Relationship

Many parents worry that boundaries will damage their relationship with their adult children, but I have found that healthy boundaries often do the exact opposite. Boundaries create clarity. They remove assumptions, reduce resentment, and help everyone understand what it looks like to share life together with mutual respect.

If your adult child is living in your home, it is perfectly reasonable to have expectations. They can contribute to the household, participate in chores, communicate their plans, and treat the people they live with respectfully. Those expectations help everyone flourish under the same roof. These are the kinds of boundaries that help you parent grown children well while still respecting their independence.

Read next: Mothers and Adult Sons: Finding Peace in a Changed Relationship

If I could leave you with just one encouragement, it would be this: don’t confuse staying involved with staying in control.

Your adult children still need you, but they need you differently than they did when they were five, ten, or fifteen. None of us will get this perfectly right. There will be moments when we step in too quickly and other moments when we wish we had spoken up sooner. Parenting has always been a journey of learning, and that doesn’t stop just because our children have become adults. 

So if this season feels tough, take heart. Learning to parent grown children with grace is a process, not a one-time decision. Ask the Lord for wisdom. Listen to the prompting of the Holy Spirit. Continue to love deeply, communicate clearly, and enjoy the people that they are!

Your child didn’t come with an instruction booklet for the various seasons of their life, but you can still trust that the same God who has been faithful in every other season of parenting will be faithful in this one too. 

The post Learning to Parent Grown Children with Grace appeared first on MomLife Today.

This month my husband and I turn 15 – we celebrate our 15th wedding anniversary! In honor of each year of marriage together, here are 15 ways we’ve learned to stay connected: 

15 Keys to Marriage Connection

1. As believers, it’s important that both you and your husband pursue your own personal relationship with the Lord.

If this becomes unbalanced, it will strain your relationship. We must rely on the creator of marriage to have a fruitful connection. I will always say and stand by this. 

Ephesians 5 gives us some great examples of what this should look like…

“Wives, follow the lead of your own husbands as you follow the Lord.” (Eph 5:22)

“Husbands, love your wives. Love them just as Christ loved the church. He gave himself up for her.” (Eph 5:25)

“In the same way, husbands should love their wives. They should love them as they love their own bodies. Any man who loves his wife loves himself. (Eph 5:28)

“Scripture says, “That’s why a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife. The two will become one.” (Eph 5:31)

“That is a deep mystery. A husband also must love his wife. He must love her just as he loves himself. And a wife must respect her husband.” (Eph 5:32)

2. Work to build and cultivate trust.

Without trust we can’t have true marriage connection and trust requires honesty and maturity. 

3. Be intentional about loving each other in the way each person is wired.

It’s not just about love them in the way that feels most comfortable to you. 

4. Allow yourselves to be each other’s mirror. 

Since our spouse is the closest person to us, they will see and experience the good, bad & ugly parts of us. We should avoid becoming defensive when they share things that require personal growth and reflection. 

5. Remember that some things about you and your husband will change over the years.

Commit to learning each other in every season of life you experience together. 

6. When there are disagreements, seek to understand.

Don’t be so focused on “winning the argument”, but instead focus on “seeking understanding.” 

7. Give each other space to be themselves.

Don’t try to make the other be someone they aren’t… or someone we want them to be. 

8. Sex and intimacy are beautiful!

Willingly become an expert in each other’s desires 

9. Establish boundaries.

Decide on your boundaries for yourselves, friends, family & co-workers, and then respect and honor them 

Read this next: How to Keep Your Marriage Strong

10. Compromise in a healthy way.

And remember, it’s not healthy if one person always gets their way.

11. Never stop dating each other 

Some ways my husband and I never stop dating each other are: 

• We always pause to celebrate our anniversary. Whether it’s a thoughtful, romantic dinner at home, dinner at a restaurant, a staycation or vacation, celebrating our anniversary is always cemented on our life calendar. 
• We will find a show or movie to watch together (during a time I won’t fall asleep!) 
• Date and conversation cards are a great resource. Here is a set we own: The Ultimate Game for Couples 
• We’ve used a Marriage Devotional, which was very critical during my husband’s deployment: #Staymarried: A Couples Devotional

(These resource recommendations are designed only for the purpose of spouse connection. There are varying levels of familiarity with each suggestion so these recommendations do not equal the full endorsement of or alignment with the authors or producers.)

12. LAUGH! Fun and laughter increase the intimacy between a husband and wife.

My husband and I share a similar sense of humor and we always find things to laugh and joke about. 

13. Be strict about the kids’ bedtime! 

We set a bedtime for our kids and stick to it. Once the house is quiet and settled this gives us time to recharge individually and reconnect with each other after a long day. 

14. Find a trusted village to watch your kids.

Staying on the topic of kids, you need a trusted village who can step in and watch them. This allows you to have date days, date nights, and if possible, to take trips. 

15. And lastly, be friends and grow to be best friends. 

Be intentional about finding things to do together. An easy way to do this is to find and have common interests. I know schedules and life are full but fight for this to keep your marriage connection.

Another way to grow in friendship is to communicate throughout the day. 

This is not a one-size-fits-all list as we all have different properties, capacities, and life schedules. But hopefully you can implement one or two of these ideas in your marriage to strengthen your marriage connection and cultivate a deeper connection with your spouse.

Remember, this takes two. You can’t fix or change your spouse. Both individuals have to be willing to work for and have a desire for connection. 

What’s one way you and your husband strengthen your marriage connection that isn’t listed above? Share it in the comments!

The post 15 Keys to Connection from 15 Years of Marriage appeared first on MomLife Today.

If you’re anything like me, you don’t have to look too far to see areas in your home you wish could be cleaner, less cluttered, or more organized.

You want your home to be a place filled with order and peace, but the laundry pile and dirty dishes are screaming loudly to be dealt with. And who has the time to declutter, reorganize, and clean with little people underfoot constantly messing up what you just put away?

Deuteronomy 6:4–9 puts it this way:

“Listen, O Israel! The Lord is our God, the Lord alone. And you must love the Lord your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your strength. And you must commit yourselves wholeheartedly to these commands that I am giving you today. Repeat them again and again to your children.

Talk about them when you are at home and when you are on the road, when you are going to bed and when you are getting up. Tie them to your hands and wear them on your forehead as reminders. Write them on the doorposts of your house and on your gates.”

But what does that look like exactly?

How to create simple home rhythms

1. Look at your own heart and the hearts of the family you share a home with. What do you want them to see and feel within these four walls? How do you want outsiders to feel when they step into your home? I would say most, if not all, of us want our homes to be filled with love, peace, and a welcoming atmosphere. Our homes don’t have to be spotless and pristine to fulfill that desire. It comes from your attitude, presence, and the way you make others feel that brings breathing space into a home.

2. Start thinking about rhythms. There are countless articles, documentaries, and books on cleaning, organizing, and keeping a home, but they can leave you feeling even more overwhelmed and stressed than before. They usually lead with rigid schedules that leave no room for flexibility or real life. What I have seen and read more often recently is this idea of having daily and weekly rhythms, not schedules.

Just the word change alone is a breath of fresh air. Rhythms allow for movement, flow, flexibility, and can easily shift with each season you’re in. The important thing is to find what works for you and your family and the stage you’re in presently—not the one you wish you were in or the one your friends and influencers are in. This is your journey.

Read this next: What If Your Home Life Needs a Different Rhythm? – Chrystal Evans Hurst

3. Start with one thing. To ease your way into creating simple home rhythms, you can start with one small task each day. For example, unload the dishwasher while your child finishes their breakfast, or wipe down the kitchen counters while they’re playing independently. Sometimes conquering one task will give you the motivation to do another. You can even enlist your children to help you dust, sweep the floors, and pick up around the house if they’re old enough.

Something I have implemented recently is a weekly toy rotation. My child has so many toys that leaving them all out all the time can lead to more things to pick up. This method keeps her interested and engaged with what she has when there’s not an endless number of toys and items to choose from.

4. Find a routine that works. Another idea to keep your home cleaner and tidier is to implement a daily and/or weekly cleaning routine. Choose one area of the house each day. For example, Mondays can be for the kitchen and Tuesdays for the bathrooms. Leave space for flexibility and time for rest. You can create a printable to post on your fridge or use a dry-erase board so the whole family knows how to pitch in and help.

Adapt the rhythms of your home as often as you need to fit your season and stage of life. These simple home rhythms are meant to help and support your journey as a mother, not add stress and overwhelm to an already demanding job. Start small, make tiny shifts in your day, and you will begin to reap the benefits of a calm and peaceful home.

Ready to finally love your days as a mom?

Want to dive in and create daily and weekly routines that make your mom life as close to stress-free as possible? Be sure to check out our Daily Rhythm Reset, available now right here!

The post How to Create Simple Rhythms That Bring Peace to Your Home appeared first on MomLife Today.

You love your children deeply, but the demands of work and home can make finding individual time with each child feel like an impossible test. You’re not alone in feeling overwhelmed and stretched thin.

Shifting your perspective on one-on-one time with your child can help you deal with the struggle. Instead of another chore, think of it as a joyful opportunity for discipleship and connection. Remember that your kids are “a heritage from the Lord,” ones whom you are privileged to nurture.

The Secret to Creating One-on-One Time With Your Child

The Heart of Quality Time

Quality one-on-one time is all about attunement. It focuses on paying attention to your child’s world, interests and heart without the distraction of phones, chores or other siblings.

It’s the difference between half-listening while you cook dinner and stopping for five minutes to make eye contact and ask about a picture they’re drawing. 

Quality time also helps set your kids up for success. When a child feels that you see and value them, it builds a better foundation that helps them do better in school and have stronger mental health.

Your children need both quantity and quality one-on-one time to build a strong relationship with you. Quantity is about being present and available, like your kids doing homework in the same room as you, running errands together or just spending time at home. It creates opportunities for conversations to happen naturally.

Meanwhile, quality time is focused and intentional, like when you put everything else aside to dedicate a specific window of time for one child. 

Ultimately, this practice of intentional connection fulfills a biblical calling.

Ephesians 6:4 commands parents to “Bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord” and to do so in a way that doesn’t “provoke your children to anger.”

Spending this focused time builds trust and love, which is the most effective context for providing spiritual instruction.

Simple Ideas for One-on-One Time With Your Child

Here are a few quality one-on-one time with your child ideas that you can integrate into your family schedule, starting today!

1. Weave It Into Your Daily Rhythm

Find connection in the mundane. These examples won’t require you to add more to your schedule: 

• Kitchen helper: Let one child wash vegetables or stir ingredients while the other reads the recipe or chops. Use this time to chat about their day. 
• Bedtime connection: Use the quiet to your advantage. Ask gentle, open-ended questions like, “What was the best part of your day?” 
• Errand partner: Frame it as a special privilege. If you’re going shopping together, let your child hold the list, find items on the shelf or choose a new fruit for the family to try. 

2. Make Reading Accessible for Every Child

Reading together creates a shared, quiet world with your kid. It also provides natural conversation starters about the story, characters and ideas. However, for some children, standard books can be a barrier to this connection. 

Consider adding adapted books to your library. These books offer a more engaging way for kids with disabilities to experience stories. They may have braille text, various textures and adaptive technology that shows moving images. These tools are also ideal if you have a child who struggles with fine motor skills or staying engaged with text alone. 

Read this next: 41 Best Story Books With Moral Values

3. Plan for Special Moments

Create memories and show your child they’re worth planning for. Take your younger kid on a trip to the park or build a fort in the living room with them after the others are in bed. Go out on a pizza date with your older child, visit a bookstore or go for a hike together. 

Nurturing shared interests helps create a bonding point unique to each of your children. You can learn something new together, like baking bread or starting a container garden. 

Read this next: The Importance of Finding 1-on-1 Time With Your Kids

Overcoming the Obstacle of Guilt

“Parenting guilt” often comes from a good place — a deep desire to be a good parent. However, it can become destructive when it turns into shame.

One way to combat this obstacle is to stop using “should” statements — instead of thinking, “I should have spent more time with him today,” think, “I’m glad that I got to talk with him for a few minutes at bedtime.”

Remember that you don’t have to be a perfect parent. Acknowledge that you’re doing your best, and learn to separate incidents from your identity as a parent. 

Nurture a Lasting Inheritance

One-on-one time is a foundational part of positive, Christian parenting. It requires both quality and quantity that we all can weave into our daily lives.

The goal is intention, not perfection. Every small effort to connect matters, and each moment is a step toward building a lasting inheritance of faith and love in your children’s hearts. 

The post The Secret to Creating One-on-One Time With Each Child appeared first on MomLife Today.

How many of us moms have said, “I can’t make one more decision”? 

The truth is, as moms, we often become the keepers of all things: the schedules, meals,  homework, appointments, sports, laundry, emotions, and somewhere in there, we’re expected to  hold it all together.

Although I appreciate being treated as “Superwoman,” these tasks can be  extremely daunting.  

Keeping up with household systems and responsibilities shouldn’t feel like we’re constantly working harder or spinning on an endless hamster wheel.

It’s not about having a home that looks like a museum  (although I do like to jokingly remind my children we live in one). It’s about creating a home  that runs with peace. 

Between academics, sports, extracurricular activities, and the everyday demands of motherhood,  life can feel overwhelming. Having systems in place has been a lifesaver for our family of five. 

Systems reduce decision fatigue, create rhythm, and allow you to breathe while the structure  quietly does the heavy lifting for you. 

And mamas, I truly believe God is not a God of chaos, but of order. (1 Corinthians 14:33)

The best household systems are simple, visible, and repeatable. 

6 Household Systems That Make Mom Life Easier

Here are a few systems that have actually worked for me, whether you’re a stay-at-home mom,  working mom, homeschool mom, or somewhere perfectly in between. 

1. Sunday Family Meetings: Preventing Monday Chaos

Sunday has become our family reset day. 

This is when I pull out my planner, gather everyone together, and we look at the week ahead.  We talk through: 

• Homework assignments 
• Upcoming tests 
• Sports practices and games 
• Doctor’s appointments 
• Extracurricular activities 
• Anything school-related that needs to be purchased or prepared
• Social and emotional needs 

With three kids, I’ve learned something very quickly: if we don’t talk about the week before  Monday arrives, Monday will absolutely try to run my life for the next seven days. 

But this time together isn’t just logistics, it’s also an emotional check-in. 

I’ll ask, “What do you need from me this week?” 

Sometimes the answers are practical… “Mom, I need poster board.” 

Sometimes they’re emotional… “Can you snuggle with me a little longer?” 

And that’s the part we can’t overlook in motherhood. In the middle of checking off lists, our children still need us emotionally, not just as schedule keepers.  

2. The Zones + Days System 

Instead of trying to do everything every day or cramming it all into one exhausting weekend, I  assign areas of the home to specific days. 

Our rhythm looks like this: 

• Sunday: Kitchen + pantry reset (and fridge clean-out before grocery shopping)
• Monday: Bathrooms 
• Tuesday: Living spaces 
• Wednesday: Errands 
• Thursday: Appointments 
• Friday: Bedrooms + fresh sheets 
• Saturday: Light reset 

This system keeps things from piling up and helps me stay ahead instead of constantly catching  up. 

And let’s be honest, if you’re anything like me, laundry is basically a daily sport in your house. 

I learned the hard way that there is nothing worse than running late for school because someone  “can’t find clothes.” Starting the morning without chaos really does set the tone for the entire  day. 

Now I do smaller loads daily and put them away immediately.

You can read more about this idea in my post What If Your Home Life Needs a Different Rhythm?.

3. The 15-Minute Evening Reset 

After dinner, I set a timer for 15 minutes. That’s it. 

During those 15 minutes, we: 

• Clear countertops 
• Put things back where they belong 
• Wipe down surfaces 
• Straighten common spaces 
• Prep for the next morning 

It’s amazing what can happen when everyone works together for just 15 minutes! Waking up to a kitchen where dishes are put away and counters are clear, alone feels like a gift. 

4. Delegate by Role, Not by Random Tasks 

One thing I’ve learned over time: Ownership works better than constant reminders. 

Instead of saying, “Can someone take out the trash?”  We assign ownership. 

For example: 

• One child owns the trash 
• One feeds the dog 
• One gathers shoes and puts them on the rack 
• One checks backpacks and lunchboxes in the morning 

When everyone knows their role, I’m not constantly managing everything, and I’m not the  household voice repeating the same requests on loop. 

5. Kids’ Bedroom Reset: Make It Fun 

I set a 15–20 minute timer and say, “Room check in 20 minutes!” and suddenly, cleaning becomes a race.

There’s something about a countdown that changes everything for kids. 

We keep expectations simple: 

• Toys put away neatly 
• Shoes off the floor 
• Dirty clothes in hampers 
• Beds straightened 

It takes consistency on the front end, but over time, it builds independence. And one day (I’m still hopeful), they’ll do it without me saying a word. 

6. Make Organization Easy 

Sometimes staying organized has less to do with motivation and more to do with simplicity. A few things that help our home function better: 

• Baskets for quick pickups and high-traffic areas 
• Drawer organizers 
• Hooks for backpacks and jackets 
• Cleaning supplies on every floor 
• A designated “drop zone” for school papers and sports gear 

It’s so much easier when everything has a place. 

Ultimately, systems aren’t about perfection. They’re about creating space. Let’s spend less time managing chaos and more time being present for the people God has entrusted to you. 

At the end of the day, we’re not just striving for clean homes. We’re creating a space where our children feel safe, grounded, and at peace. 

And sometimes, the most spiritual thing we can do as mothers is simply simplify.

The post 6 Systems That Help Me Keep Up with Household Responsibilities appeared first on MomLife Today.

I’ve always struggled to feel like I was a “good enough” mom. A mom who deserved the accolade of “Best Mom” scribbled on a card from her kids on Mother’s Day.

I don’t bake bread from scratch (although I have used a bread machine!). I don’t create homemade birthday cakes that belong in a magazine. (But I do make box cake mixes and toss sprinkles on top of the frosting).

When my kids were under the age of 8, I didn’t want playdates to last more than two hours (even better if we just met up somewhere else like a park). During the naptime years, I didn’t use those golden minutes to meal prep or clean the house, but to work out, shower, and read my Bible.

We all have limitations, but the God we’re created to point to doesn’t (cue the confetti!). We want our kids to place their hope in Jesus, not us.

Read this next: Why Do I Feel So Stuck as a Mom?

Combat Mom Guilt with God’s Grace, Not Perfection

God’s Grace for Imperfect Moms

We can’t be everywhere all the time, especially if we have more than one child. We can’t attend every sports game. We can’t chaperone every field trip. We can’t always be on time, especially when a stray shin guard is left behind. If our kids attend school outside the home, we can’t be with them all day long there.

We can’t get it right every time. We may snap at our kids when we’re stressed and have to seek forgiveness. We might forget to do something we said we would.

We might wish we’d put more thought into a plan for a day off from school. We might miss a family devotion during a busy day—or month. 

Experiencing our inability to be everywhere or be everything we imagine we should be reminds us we’re not God—and we were never meant to be. 

When we stand face-to-face with our insecurities and shortcomings as a parent, we can draw comfort from God’s grace. Believers can marvel that before the foundation of the world, God chose us to be His:

“Even as he chose us in him before the foundation of the world, that we should be holy and blameless before him” (Ephesians 1:4 ESV).

The book of Revelation mentions the names of those who were written in the book of life before the foundation of the world (Revelation 13:8, 17:8).

The book of life contains the names of those who will be with the Lord forever. God extended grace to his children—to you and I—before he spoke the world into existence. Incredible!

As mind blowing as this is, there’s more. The name of the book mentioned in Revelation is quite lengthy: “the book of life of the Lamb who was slain” (Revelation 13:8).

Before we took our first breath, God already devised a plan to redeem us and put his grace on display through Jesus. Before the Father created the world, he already knew Jesus would die on the cross to magnify his glory and grace because we would sin and rebel against him and need rescuing.

I struggle to plan out meals for the week and what time we eat dinner on a given night with the moving target of sports practices. But God mapped out how every single one of his children would be reconciled to Him before he spoke a single word of creation!

Point Your Kids to Jesus, Not Perfection

When God created us in his image, we were meant to reflect him to the world. So others can taste and see his goodness (Psalm 34:8) through our lives. That’s our primary role as parents: to point our kids to Jesus! 

This side of heaven, we can’t be “good enough.” We can’t be everywhere. We can’t always do everything just right. But we know who is more than good enough and is always with us. We can point our kids to God. 

We can teach our kids about the beauty of God’s grace best put on display through Jesus’ death on the cross. God’s love, grace, mercy, and justice collide on the cross and it was ordained to be so before the foundation of the world.

When we feel discouraged or question if we’ll ever be “good enough,” we can remind ourselves how we were never meant to do it all or figure everything out. We’re not God. 

We can turn our eyes to Jesus’ death on the cross and stand in awe of God’s grace lavished upon us. Then we can model dependency on God, not us.

This doesn’t mean we don’t look for ways to grow as parents or that we shouldn’t be reliable. As parents, we should be a trusted source of support and a Christlike model. But it does mean we don’t teach our kids to turn to us more than to God. The Lord must be our kids’ firm foundation. 

And our lives should emulate this reality to our kids. They should see our reliance on God, not ourselves.

In practice, this could look like stopping to pray to God more together. Acknowledging our shortcomings to our kids and reminding them to turn to Jesus when things don’t go the way they’d hoped. When our kids face challenges, we repeat the truth that God is always with them even when we can’t be. 

One day our kids will launch off into the world. And if we’ve reflected clinging to God’s grace well, they’ll be fully equipped to trust and hope in Jesus, not themselves.

Hope in ourselves disappoints. Hope in God’s grace never does.

The post Combat Mom Guilt with God’s Grace, Not Perfection appeared first on MomLife Today.

There was a season when afternoons with my middle-school daughter looked like this: pick up from school at 3:15, then spend the next five hours reviewing everything that had already been taught that day.

I remember the math-problem tears, the worksheet frustration, the “I don’t get it,” and the exhaustion that somehow belonged to both of us by the time dinner rolled around. 

My girl just needed a little educational TLC.

One evening, while sitting at the table watching my child grow completely overwhelmed, I thought to myself, “If I’m going to spend all this time working through all the school work anyway, why would I not just teach her myself?”

My husband and I decided to do just that.

Our homeschooling journey ended up being an amazing option for my daughter, but that certainly doesn’t mean it was the easiest. Just because something is right for your family doesn’t mean that it comes without challenges.

In addition to home education, I still had responsibilities for work, dishes in the sink, laundry piles in the corner, emails to respond to, groceries to pick up, and the everyday realities of trying to care for my home and family well.

From my years spent learning this lesson, I have a few nuggets of wisdom I’d like to share with you.

Your Home Needs a Different Rhythm

One mindset shift that helped me tremendously was realizing that our home needed rhythms more than it needed rigid schedules. For a while, I thought the answer was to create the perfect schedule or find the perfect system that would somehow make every part of life run smoothly every single day.

What I eventually learned is that life with children requires flexibility, especially when you are homeschooling and working at the same time. 

Interruptions are part of real life, and trying to follow super detailed schedules can leave you feeling defeated. Work calls happen. Someone spills something. A lesson takes longer than expected. A child needs extra attention. 

So I started to institute a different rhythm. We needed mornings that felt focused without being frantic, so I created a rhythm for our meals. Once I stopped trying to force perfection into our days, our home started feeling much more peaceful. 

You Cannot Do Everything Alone

Another thing I had to learn was that asking for help was not a sign of failure. Somewhere along the way, many of us picked up the belief that needing support meant we were not capable. Meanwhile, we don’t expect a business, a church, or an organization to function well with one exhausted person doing everything alone! 

You need community. 

In that season, sometimes help looked like co-ops. Other times, it looked like another mom sharing educational resources or motherhood wisdom with me. It also looked like simplifying dinner (breakfast for dinner works great!) or allowing the older kids to take on more responsibilities around the house. Most importantly, it looked like accepting that not every area of life needed my full energy every single day. 

Ecclesiastes tells us that there are seasons for everything (Eccl. 3:1). There will be seasons when work needs more attention, and there will be others when you may have to sacrifice at work in order to be home with your family.

Wisdom is learning how to recognize what matters most right now instead of feeling guilty about the things you are not currently holding. 

Read this next: The Truth About Homeschooling

Your Home Matters Too

Home management is a full-time job. It’s also meaningful and rewarding. I know a lot of women who carry so much responsibility with excellence. We manage projects, solve problems, care for people, meet deadlines, remember details, and hold so much together for everybody around us. Because of that, it can sometimes feel discouraging when our home life still feels unfinished or messy at the end of the day. 

I have come to learn that a well-cared-for home is more about intention than perfection. It’s about creating an environment where your family can rest, grow, connect, and feel safe.

Some days, that looks like all things organized and productive. Other days, it looks like books spread across the table, laundry on the sofa waiting to be folded, and dinner being a little later than planned because a conversation with your child mattered more in that moment. 

Your home does not have to look perfect to be healthy. The atmosphere matters more than appearances ever will. The way your family feels in your home matters. The rhythms you create matter. 

I had no idea that when I made the decision to homeschool my daughter, and eventually my other children as well, the impact that living and learning together would have on our family. What seemed like an educational decision was really reshaping the way we connected at home. 

If you are in a season of trying to balance homeschooling, work, and home, I hope you give yourself grace along the way.

Some of the most meaningful things your children will carry with them will not be the perfectly executed lessons or color-coded schedules, but the feeling of being known, supported, and deeply loved within the walls of your home. 

Developing healthy rhythms for your family starts with having healthy rhythms yourself. Download my 5 Day Rhythm Reset guide to move toward calmer, more intentional days right here.

The post What If Your Home Life Needs a Different Rhythm? appeared first on MomLife Today.

Pregnancy and childbirth are truly miraculous, wonderful events. There’s the anxious anticipation of what your child will look like, who they will become, and what kind of personality they will bring.

You spend months coming up with a name, a theme for the nursery, and picking out the perfect registry items.

You’re elated to feel their first movements and hear the heartbeat at each doctor’s appointment. Then the day finally arrives when you will come face-to-face with your newborn and begin the journey into motherhood.

The Truth About Postpartum Challenges That No One Talks About

Maybe for you the delivery experience was all you’d hoped it would be. Maybe, like me, it was the start of many challenges faced as a new mom. 

I remember the joy I felt on the first day in the hospital. I had to deliver by c-section, but everything had gone smoothly. Our little girl was healthy and beautiful. The care she and I received that day was wonderful.

Unfortunately, I couldn’t say the same for the days after. I have already been diagnosed with clinical anxiety, but when I began being monitored for high blood pressure after delivery, it only enhanced my anxious thoughts about my health.

We also started experiencing feeding issues and a drop in my daughter’s weight that really caused me to spiral. Through the grace of God, we were finally able to come home as a family.

We continued to struggle with feeding difficulties, and I battled spiraling feelings for not doing enough for her nutritionally.

Thankfully, I have a church community of other young moms who faced similar challenges. I reached out for advice and was pleasantly surprised at the stories I heard and encouragement they brought to me and my situation. 

You see, no one ever really prepares you for the challenges once the baby arrives.

On one hand, I don’t guess anyone ever really can adequately prepare you until you are thrust into the cycle yourself. Everyone’s experience is different, everyone’s child is different, the situations are not the same.

You have working moms, moms staying at home, spouses who travel, moms who are raising little ones on their own; the scenarios are endless.

My hope is to shed light and hope for moms who are facing the challenges that postpartum brings and may be wondering to themselves, “it’s not supposed to be this way”.

Feeling Overwhelmed? Here are 13 Words of Encouragement for Moms of Littles

3 Tips for Postpartum Challenges

It’s been almost two years since giving birth to my daughter and I’m still learning. But I have found a few things along the way that can help ease the stress and struggle of the postpartum season.

1. Find a community and get involved!

I cannot stress this one enough, but the journey of motherhood can be lonely, and it only makes the days feel longer and challenging if you don’t invite others into the journey with you.

This doesn’t have to be complicated or grand. Something as simple as spending time at another mom’s house while the kids play can be rewarding. Find a Mommy and Me group to get involved with, a Mother’s Day Out program that fits your needs for some alone time. I am lucky to be surrounded by a community of young families at the church I attend that I can lean on for support and advice.

2. If you’re a stay-at-home mom, get out of the house regularly.

This one can be more difficult, especially if you have more than one child in tow, but it’s so helpful to your mindset and even for the children too. A change of scenery does the body and mind good.

Again, this doesn’t need to be a full day excursion, keep it short and simple, especially in the beginning. Grab a coffee at the local shop, run to the grocery store, and even just go through a drive-thru, but getting out will be good for mom’s mental health and it’s good for the children to experience something new.

As you get more comfortable with outings, check out your local library for story time sessions. This is a good time for children to learn to play together with others and for moms, it’s a way to meet other moms in the community and maybe have some adult conversations.

3. Dedicate time with God and to prayer every day.

Before my daughter came into the picture, I had a regular routine of writing in a prayer journal every morning before heading off to work. It set the tone of my day and quieted my mind. These days my quiet time looks very different.

It has changed from first thing in the morning to middle of the night, evenings after bedtime, or midday during naps. Some days I missed them all together. I can tell the difference on the days that I do miss. You must find what works for you. Everyone’s day is going to look different. Be consistent with talking to God and reading from his Word. It makes a world of difference. 

Here are some of my favorite verses for being encouraged:

“So humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. Come close to God, and God will come close to you. Wash your hands, you sinners; purify your hearts, for your loyalty is divided between God and the world.” – James 4:7-8 NLT

“Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.” – John 15:4 NLT

If you’re facing postpartum challenges today, remember: It may not be the way you thought it would be, but God is still faithfully meeting you right here in it.

The post It’s Not Supposed to Be this Way: 3 Tips for Facing Postpartum Challenges appeared first on MomLife Today.

For example…this blog. I thought this would be relatively easy to write, after all I have a fair amount of experience. I got this…and by this I mean mental overload (not the blog).

It feels as if God has allowed me to be about as overloaded as I’ve ever been. It’s a gentle reminder from a Dad who knows I still (and always will) need Him.

One of my friends commented on how well I was juggling everything. (Clearly she wasn’t looking closely.) I responded, “Yeah, until the flaming torches get tossed into the mix.”  

I don’t feel like I’m juggling colorful balls. I’m pretty sure everything I’m juggling is either flammable or on fire. It feels like if I drop one, everything is going up in flames.

Each one of those juggly things is something I can’t stop thinking about…no matter how hard I try. So I juggle and try to do life with some grace…

And juggle and try to accomplish things and not look like the failure I feel I am…

And juggle and try to help, advise, and encourage from a place of needing it all myself too…

And juggle and try to rest and sleep…which seems to grow increasingly difficult. 

When the Exhaustion of Motherhood Feels Too Heavy to Carry

Before becoming a mom, I had no clue how many thoughts and feelings I could have and deal with in any given moment. You’d think after so many years, I’d be excellent at juggling all the things. Unfortunately, this gal is a wreck inside.

No matter our circumstances or stress, we are all, as women, particularly prone to the stress of carrying a heavy mental load. The world and even the church often offers self-care as the solution.

But can I just say… self-care feels like another to-do I can’t do, and therefore it makes me feel like a failure yet again? Personally, I’d rather take something off the list.

A Simple Shift When You Feel Overwhelmed

As I’ve been writing, I thought about how we already know how hard being a mom is and how the mental load can feel impossible. We need solutions.

And, although I don’t have the magic pill, the perfect schedule, or the spa vacation we’d all appreciate, I do have something I can share that, although it doesn’t necessarily check things off the list, it does provide a perspective shift that will hopefully help…

My simple strategy is not earth-shattering, but it has helped.

I love a good to do list or ten, but sometimes they are not my friends. I makes lists daily, but too often my lists are more like wish lists than practical guidance for what to do in a day. My lists go on and on and on…they feel eternal.

I have realized I need to make a conscious effort to focus on what I need to and can get done in a day. I’ve learned that it is more helpful to make a list of what is possible.

This helps me put things on paper that I can actually do, not just wish I’d done. And, at the end of the day when I look back and my to-do list is mostly or all done my mental clutter gets a little lighter and one of those flaming juggling balls is extinguished. 

The post Juggling with Fire: Dealing with the Exhaustion of Motherhood appeared first on MomLife Today.

Father’s Day is almost here! And if you’re anything like me… you’re still not ready for it! These holidays really do seem to sneak up on us every year. But if you’re searching for thoughtful, easy, and last-minute Father’s Day ideas, you’re in the right place.

Whether you want something meaningful, practical, DIY, or budget-friendly, Father’s Day is such a great opportunity to honor the dads, husbands, grandpas, and father figures in our lives and show them how much we care.

So if the clock is ticking and you still need to decide on a thoughtful way to celebrate the Dad in your life, we’re happy to help!

*This post contains affiliate links from which we may receive a commission if a purchase is made.*

Whether you have young kids, older kids, or you want to honor your husband or dad yourself, we’ve put together 60 easy Father’s Day ideas that can come from the whole family.

Save this post, highlight the best gifts and even send this list over to a friend. Hopefully you’ll find the perfect gift, and this last minute list will come in handy for years to come!

Decide to try out a few of these from the lists? Let me know in the comments how it goes! 

20 Father’s Day Gift Ideas From Young Kids

Do you have young kids who still need hands on help for celebrating dad? We’ve got you covered. These Father’s Day ideas are simple, personal, and perfect for young kids to create, from toddlers all the way up to ages 9 or 10!

1. Handmade Card: Have your kids put together a  colorful, personalized card with a heartfelt message!

2. Breakfast in Bed: Prepare a simple breakfast like toast, cereal, or pancakes and his morning coffee with some help from mom or an older sibling.

3. DIY Picture Frame: Decorate a plain picture frame with stickers, paint, or other craft supplies and add a family photo.

4. Coupon Book: Looking for a unique gift idea? Help your child create a booklet of coupons offering things like “one free hug,” “help with chores,” or “movie night together.”

5. Custom Mug: Invite each of your kids to decorate a plain white mug with ceramic markers for their own unique design! You can also find DIY kits on Amazon Prime for this!

6. Handprint Art: Make a piece of art using the child’s handprint or footprint and frame it. This is an awesome gift idea for new dads.

7. Memory Jar: Fill a jar with notes of favorite memories or reasons why they love their dad.

Looking for even more great Father’s Day ideas? Read: 30 Ways to Help Your Kids Honor Dad This Father’s Day 

8. Snack Basket: Put together a basket of his favorite snacks and treats.

9. Personalized Keychain: Use beads and string to make a keychain with dad’s initials or a special message.

10. Drawing or Painting: Create a piece of artwork specifically for dad.

11. Bookmarks: Handmade bookmarks with drawings or messages.

12. Story Time: Write and illustrate a short story or comic book featuring dad as the hero.

13. Puzzle Piece Picture: Glue puzzle pieces together to create a picture or frame a photo.

14. Decorated Photo Album: Fill a small photo album with family photos and let the child decorate it.

15. Baked Treats: If your husband has a sweet tooth, have the kids bake cookies or cupcakes and decorate them for Father’s Day.

16. Plant a Seed: Plant a seed or small plant in a decorated pot for dad to grow.

17. Tie-Dye T-Shirt: Create a tie-dye t-shirt with dad’s favorite colors.

18. Scavenger Hunt: Set up a fun scavenger hunt with small notes or treats leading to the final gift.

19. Handmade Bookmark: Craft a personalized bookmark with drawings, stickers, and a special message.

20. Outdoor Adventure: Plan a day out like a picnic, hike, or a trip to the park with dad. Sometimes quality time really is the best gift of all!

These ideas are simple, personal, and perfect for young kids to create with a little help!

20 Creative Father’s Day Ideas From Older Kids

As our kids get older, it’s lot easier for them to give feedback, ideas and really get involved in the gift giving process. Maybe choose a few of these from the list and then let your older kids decide what they would like to do for Dad!

In this list you’ll find a mix of practical gifts, budget-friendly gifts, and ideas that you can put together even if you only have a little time. No matter what kind of dad you have, there’s an idea in this list!

1. Digital Photo Frame: Pre-load it with family photos and memories. This one has great reviews. 

2. Personalized Playlist: Create a playlist of dad’s favorite songs or music that reminds you of him.

3. DIY Grilling Kit: Assemble a kit with a variety of marinades, spices, and grilling tools. There are also some pretty impressive Grilling Kits online.

4. Subscription Service: Sign him up for a subscription box tailored to his interests, such as snacks, coffee, or books.

5. Custom Phone Case: Design a personalized phone case with a family photo or a meaningful design.

6. Fitness Tracker: Grab a basic fitness tracker to help him keep active and healthy.

7. Gourmet Gift Basket: Put together a basket with gourmet cheeses, meats, chocolates, and his favorite drinks.

8. Memory Book: Create a scrapbook or photo book filled with pictures and stories of favorite moments together.

9. Homemade Dinner: Cook his favorite meal or plan a special dinner with all his favorite dishes.

10. DIY Spa Kit: Gather items like a good razor, shaving cream, aftershave, and maybe a face mask for a pampering kit. Encourage him to use it after a long day at work!

11. Tool Organizer: If you have the budget, you can always get him a tool organizer or a new set of tools if he’s into DIY projects.

12. Handwritten Letter: Write a heartfelt letter expressing gratitude and sharing favorite memories.

13. Board Game or Puzzle: A new board game or a challenging puzzle for family game nights makes a great gift!

14. Car Care Kit: Assemble a kit with car wash supplies, air fresheners, and other car care items.

15. Gift Card: A gift card to his favorite restaurant, coffee shop, or store.

16. Virtual Class or Experience: Sign him up for a virtual cooking class, a golf lesson, or another experience that he’d enjoy!

17. DIY Terrarium: Create a small terrarium for his office or home.

18. Sporting Goods: Think about some new gear for his favorite sport or hobby, like golf balls, a tennis racket, or fishing gear.

19. Tech Gadget: A useful tech gadget like a wireless charger, a portable Bluetooth speaker, or smart home device is always a great choice!

20. Volunteer Together: Plan a day of volunteering together for a cause he cares about.

These ideas are thoughtful and cater to a variety of interests, making them great for older kids to give.

20 Father’s Day Ideas From a Wife to Her Husband

Father’s Day is also such a great time for us as wives to acknowledge, honor and celebrate how important and special our husband is to our family! If you’re looking for an idea or way to mark this Father’s Day for your husband, check out these ideas. 

1. A Bible for Men: I personally love the He Reads Truth Bible. You can leave a personalized note in the front and have your kids sign it too!

2. Personalized Watch: A watch with an engraved message on the back.

3. Romantic Dinner: Cook his favorite meal or order from his favorite restaurant and set up a special dinner at home.

4. Weekend Getaway: If you have childcare, plan a spontaneous weekend trip or a staycation in your city!.

5. Customized Photo Book: Create a photo book or DIY photo album with pictures and memories of your family.

6. Massage or Spa Day: Give him a massage or book a couple’s spa day.

7. Subscription Services: Sign him up for a subscription box tailored to his interests, such as gourmet foods, coffee, or tech gadgets.

8. New Gadget: Surprise him with a new gadget he’s been eyeing, like a smartwatch, tablet, or wireless earbuds.

9. Fitness Gear: Get him new workout gear, a fitness tracker, or a subscription to an online fitness class.

10. Personalized Accessories: Customized items like a wallet, keychain, or cufflinks with his initials.

11. Outdoor Adventure: Plan an outdoor activity like hiking, fishing, or a picnic.

12. DIY Gift Basket: Assemble a basket with his favorite snacks, drinks, and small gifts.

13. Personalized Mug: A custom mug with a special message or family photo.

14. Date Night Jar: Fill a jar with date night ideas written on slips of paper for future planning.

15. Hobby Supplies: Get supplies for his favorite hobby, whether it’s cooking, painting, or woodworking.

16. Streaming Service Subscription: Sign him up for a new streaming service or pay for a year of his current favorite.

17. Stylish Clothing: Buy a stylish piece of clothing or a new accessory he’ll love.

18. Books or Audiobooks: A book by his favorite author or an audiobook subscription.

19. Experience Gift: Tickets to a future concert, sports event, or show he’d enjoy.

20. Memory Jar: Fill a jar with notes of shared memories and reasons why you love him.

21. Home Improvement Project: Offer to help him complete a home improvement project he’s been wanting to do together. Then, set a date and actually get it done!

No matter your budget or timeline, these Father’s Day ideas are all about helping the dads in your life feel loved, appreciated, and celebrated. Sometimes the most meaningful gifts really are the simple ones!

Last but not least, Father’s Day is all about spending time together and having fun as a family! I love the ideas found in this post from Tracey Eyster on how to make dad laugh this Father’s Day. Check it out!

How are you and your family planning to celebrate Father’s Day this year? 

The post 60 Easy Father’s Day Ideas and Gifts for Dad (Free + DIY Included!) appeared first on MomLife Today.

Parenting through health challenges is exhausting and unpredictable, but you don’t have to figure it out alone. Here you’ll find practical help, encouragement, and faith-filled guidance for the hard days.

Parenting is a blessing, but some days it can stretch you thin. When you’re parenting through health challenges like chronic pain, fatigue, anxiety, depression, migraines, autoimmune flare-ups, or a new diagnosis, the whole day can feel heavier than it should.

But on your hardest days, you’re still a faithful parent just by showing up, even when your capacity looks different from what you’re used to. 

When Parenting Through Health Challenges Affects Your Days

You might be parenting with a clearly named health condition, or you might just feel off and not know why. Either way, the shift can be disorienting.

The routines that used to feel normal might feel harder, the noises louder and the messes bigger. Your reactions to all of these changes might even surprise you. 

Psalm 46:1 says God is “a very present help in trouble.” He’s not waiting for you to get it together first. He’s present in the middle of the day when you’re trying to make lunch and your head is pounding, or your chest is tight and your energy drops like a phone battery on a busy day. 

So, give this season a name without shame. You can acknowledge that you’re parenting through illness, recovery, grief or mental health struggles. That honesty is essential because it’s often the first step toward peace. 

Read this next: 37 Powerful Bible Verses About Leaning on God for Help

When Mental Health Affects Your Parenting

Mental health and parenting are connected in a way that feels almost too obvious once you say it out loud. When your mind is overwhelmed, your parenting can feel like it’s happening through fog.

Anxiety may keep your body on alert, and when you feel depressed, everything takes more effort. 

A Simple Daily Check-In

This is where a gentle check-in can help. Some parents use a parenting stress scale as a simple self-check-in.

Try asking yourself once a day:

• What’s raising my stress right now?
• What’s draining me?
• What’s one thing that’s helping, even a little?

Jot it down somewhere so you can pick up the pattern thread. When you see the pattern, you can plan around it. You can also reduce the friction and stop blaming yourself for something that has a real reason behind it. 

Small, Realistic Ways to Support Your Mental Health

If your schedule is packed and you feel like you have no room for mental health practices, there are a few things that can fit into a busy life to help you find a rhythm that feels realistic.

1. Even a few minutes of sunlight can be beneficial. While vitamin D supports calcium absorption in the gut and bone growth, research also shows that 5-15 minutes of sun three times a week is generally enough to help combat anxiety and depression through its serotonin-promoting properties. 

2. Also, ask God for wisdom. James 1:5 says if you lack wisdom, you can ask God and He gives generously.

Wisdom can look like calling your doctor, adjusting your expectations or saying no to one more commitment, even if you feel guilty at first.

Start With Compassion 

A weird lie that sneaks in for many parents is that if you had stronger faith, you would handle your situation better, or if you trusted God, you would have more stamina to enjoy life.

But faith is not a force field. Instead, it’s a hand reaching for Jesus while you’re still tired. 

Matthew 11:28-30 has been a lifeline for me in hard seasons. Jesus invites the weary to come to Him. His yoke is easy and His burden is light. That does not mean your life comes easy. It just means you don’t have to carry the load alone. You’re allowed to build your week around gentleness. 

Start by choosing a couple of anchors for the week. Think in terms of non-negotiables — two or three things that help you function and help your home stay steady.

Maybe that looks like: 

• Taking your medication on time
• Eating regular meals, even if they are basic 
• A consistent bedtime routine for the kids 
• Ten minutes of quiet prayer in the morning
• A short walk or stretch that helps your body feel less stuck

Build a Plan

Finally, build a small plan that respects your limits, and you can repeat week after week. Then, create a low-energy to-do list, or parenting menu, for the days when your capacity dips. This is one of those things that sounds almost too simple, but lists can significantly reduce the risk of decision fatigue altogether.

Your plan might include: 

• Floor time with a puzzle or blocks
• Audiobooks or read-alouds while you rest your body
• Coloring pages and stickers at the table 
• A movie afternoon with snacks and blankets
• Easy outside time on the porch with some bubbles 

And yes, screen time can live here without shame. You’re not failing parenting. Instead, you’re adapting and choosing what keeps everyone, including yourself, okay. 

A Closing Blessing 

If you are parenting with health challenges, God sees you. He sees the courage of making breakfast when you feel worn down and the humility of trying again after a hard moment.

Isaiah 40:31 reminds you that hope in the Lord brings renewed strength. Sometimes that renewal looks like energy and sometimes it looks like steady endurance. Either way, you’re not alone. 

The post A Christian Mom’s Guide to Parenting Through Health Challenges appeared first on MomLife Today.

As I sit here scrolling Instagram, I come across tidy homes with sunlight beaming through, reels of moms who seem to have it all together, and perfectly curated toddler meals.

I look around my own house: toys are strewn across the floor, the remains of breakfast are stuck to the highchair, and I’m still wearing my pajamas. Thoughts like “I’m not doing enough” or “Why can’t we be more put together?” can quickly take over.

Comparison comes easy these days. We see moms dressed in their best, the kids appear clean and well-behaved, the house is spotless, and everyone is smiling. Am I missing something?

Read next: 32 Top Bible Verses About Comparison and Contentment

Motherhood doesn’t come with a manual. There are no training sessions, courses, or degrees that teach you exactly what to do when you become a mom. Motherhood is thrust upon us, whether we feel equipped or not. It’s a learn-as-you-go, ask-for-help-and-forgiveness-along-the-way, shot-in-the-dark mission.

But our minds are so easily focused on the outside world that it clouds our view of what’s right in front of us. Social media and the internet sit right at our fingertips, offering endless advice and suggestions.

We seek affirmation and quick answers to our current situations from unreliable sources. We want to know we’re feeding our children the right way, providing the best education, and giving them the right opportunities to make friends.

Comparison leads us to resent our own precious life. It leaves us with feelings of doubt, frustration, anxiety, and depression. Left unchecked, we can lose sight of the mission God has called us to.

He made each one of us mothers at this time, in this moment, for a reason — a greater purpose. Only you can be the right mother for your child.

Sure, there are similar seasons and phases we all go through, and it can be helpful to lean on family, friends, and community for support and encouragement along the way. But we can’t lose sight of the fact that God has made each one of us on purpose for a purpose.

—

How Do We Fight Back When Comparison Comes Knocking?

1. Immerse Yourself in God’s Word

When we are actively reading Scripture and listening to God’s teachings, we see that He is with us in every trial and every season. He was with us before we became career women, wives, and mothers. He is with you now in the throes of parenthood, waiting for you to look up.

“And be sure of this: I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

(Matthew 28:20b NLT)

2. Be in Constant Prayer and Communication with the Lord

God wants us to be honest and tell Him how we feel. When we’re struggling, it helps to talk it out with a trusted source — and who better than the God of the universe? He is the best listener. He’s never distracted while you’re pouring out what’s on your heart and mind.

I’m reminded of Hannah in the Bible, who longed deeply for a child. She faced ridicule and abuse from other women, but she never gave up hope. One day, overwhelmed with emotion, she poured out her deepest desires before God. He heard her prayer and answered. And even after receiving the child she longed for, she gave her son back to God just as she had promised. You can read more of her story in 1 Samuel 1–2.

“My heart rejoices in the Lord! The Lord has made me strong.”

(1 Samuel 2:1a NLT)

3. Step Away from Social Media and Put Down Your Phone

I’ve been off social media for a while now, and it has been one of the best things for my mental health. I realize this may not be possible for everyone, but it has been incredibly freeing for me.

Especially in the evenings, once the children are in bed and the house is finally quiet, the temptation to endlessly scroll is strong. We think it helps us unwind, but it often fills us with more fatigue and stress than we had to begin with. It can lead to spiraling thoughts that keep our hearts and minds from being filled with the peace and joy we desperately need.

Set time limits on your devices. Put them away at night. Read an enjoyable book instead. Fill your cup so you can properly pour into others — your spouse, your children, and your community.

“I pray that God, the source of hope, will fill you completely with joy and peace because you trust in him. Then you will overflow with confident hope through the power of the Holy Spirit.”

(Romans 15:13 NLT)

What helps you to fight back when comparison steals your joy? We’d love to hear about what you’ve learned in the comments!

The post When Comparison Steals Your Joy of Motherhood appeared first on MomLife Today.