Depending on the time of the month, the actions of your children, and the state of your home, finances and love life - the answer to that question can vary.

Aren’t there some days that you are thankful to have the health of your children and other loved ones even if your bank account isn’t so healthy?

Then on other days, because we’re human, envy can come into play causing us to look with less than brotherly love on old friends or colleagues whose financial success exceeds our own.

It’s battle many of us deal with to varying degrees of success.  Pop psychologists encourage us to avoid those dark thoughts by keeping journals where we list those things we are thankful for to encourage a culture of gratitude.

While I’m no big fan of pop psychology, the whole notion of being thankful for the ”real” gifts in our lives is something that many of us were taught in our families or faith groups. Sometimes we need that reminder to look beyond the obstacles of the day to see the big picture of your life.

You know the saying “not being able to see the forest for the trees?” Well that’s a sentiment that is never more true than during this age of rapid change and constant busyness.

Sometimes we’re so caught up in what’s wrong with our lives that we fail to see the big picture that is made up of small successes and triumphs.

According to psychologist Dr. Benna Sherman “psychological research literature repeatedly demonstrates that gratitude is a significant predictor of happiness.  It’s not what or how much you have that defines whether you’ll be happy.  It’s whether you are grateful for what you have that matters.  Once the most basic survival needs are met, having more doesn’t make you happy.  How you feel about what you have is what determines whether you are a happy.”

And while I love my 50 year old, little house, a new bay window and one of those built in capocchino makers would add nicely to my current state of happiness!

ShareThis

One of the challenges of mentoring older children is helping them with a curriculum we know longer understand as well we might.  sure I took calculus in high school but that was 25 years ago and this English major has buried those memories, far, far away-lol!

Here are some tips to try to help your older teen get through exams:

• Try to help control the distractions that can disrupt study time.  As much as you want to watch CSI, try to go cold turkey these few weeks.  Even though your teen may be studying in her room or in another area of the house, sometimes a trip to the kitchen to get a refreshment will end up turning into a 30-minute break catching up on CSI with you.  Keep the house as quiet as you can.
• Prepare light and healthy dinners during exam week.  Less carbs and more veggies and protein will give your teens the energy they need for long study sessions.
• Monitor chat time on cell phones, MSN and Facebook.  Don’t start an argument but sometimes a gentle reminder that chat time is eating into study time is just what your teen needs.
• Remember when the kids were young tikes and you’d promise them some special treat upon completion of some task or chore?  Well even though we’re raising our teens to be self-motivated individuals, it won’t hurt to offer some treat upon the completion of their exams.  Just the knowledge of something special at the end of exams is enough to energize sleep deprived teen in the middle of exams. 

ShareThis

What many women are finding is that between managing their career or business, playing chauffeur for kids, giving their homes some semblance of order and being the resident family crisis expert there is virtually NO time left to meet with the people who once held a special place in their lives.

Making matters worse is the ease, familiarly and utility of the Internet. From shopping for ourselves and our families, to searching out answers to life’s daily issues, the Internet is often responsible for carving out a chunk of what little down time we have.

According to the recent report “Women Online: Taking a New Look” almost 52% of Americans who are online are women.  Women enjoy the way the Internet enhances our lives, from finding deals to finding support and even friendship.

But at what expense to our non-virtual, every day lives?

Some women explain that developing online relationships has been wonderful–so much so that they are beginning to lose touch or even the same interest in some non-virtual friendships.  When networks like Twitter and social groups for women in business or with various interests become a vital part of an already overloaded calendar, it’s easy to lose touch with those friends who live close to you.

A Duke University study found that in the last two decades the number of people that Americans can count as confidants and good friends that they meet with face-to-face, has dropped from around 3 people to 2.

Sociologists agree that having  fewer close friends in our lives has an impact.  Our friends give us advice, moral support and an emotional safety net that can be extremely important for our well being especially when going through stressful times. Those are often the times when a “virtual” hug is not enough.

So enjoy your career, your business, make yourself available to your kids, your husband/partner/relatives…but don’t forget about the time you need for real, genuine friendships outside of your family circle.

Make an appointment to meet that good friend you haven’t seen in years, even if you’re not up to having a friend over because you haven’t  cleaned up the mess left by a house full of teens or paperwork from your business/career.  That’s what coffee shops are for.

There’s something practically theraputic about looking into the eyes of a good friend as you laugh over a joke or a memory that only the two of you can appreciate.

ShareThis

I remember saying after my 11 lb son was born that I was a Yummy Mummy and that the little bulge around my middle was only that pesty post-partum baby fat that I’d be dropping soon enough…in time.

I ran with that little tale of  self delusion for about 15 years, long after I’d stopped running after my son in the market and just about until his 16th birthday last month!

The truth is this Yummy Mummy has a saggy tummy that I can no longer wear as a badge of honor or testament to my heroic child bearing years.  Yes my son was 11 lbs. but I need to get over it and lose this body appendage growing around my middle.

Here’s one EASY tummy exercise I thought I’d share so others can join me in being finally rid of this baby fat (now that the kids are off to college!):

The Smart Crunch

• Lie on the floor with your knees bent and the bottom of your feet flat on the ground.
• Place your hands alongside your belly button.  Press two fingers from each hand firmly into your abdomen.
• Gently begin to draw your lower abdomen down towards the floor, raise your chest and hold your breath.
• When you feel your muscles tighten stop drawing in your stomach.  The muscles underneath your fingers should feel firm.
• Hold this position for 15 seconds breathing normally the entire time.
• Do 10 repetitions.

ShareThis

I like her video primarily because she breaks down very nicely the process of goal setting (e.g., making it measurable and ensuring it is part of your plan “you have to know where you’re going or you most definitely won’t get there”). She also zeros in one of the goals many women aren’t too aggressive about - making money!

Watch with your notepad in hand.

ShareThis

President-elect Barack Obama and his wife Michelle are in their mid 40’s, the Bidens (especially Joe) are little beyond that age but close enough. Take a look at the picture of the Obamas and the Bidens used in this post.  Don’t they remind you of your senior year?  You know that year in high school when it seemed that everyone was looking up at you and your peers as  a group and as individuals who were suppose to know the lay of the land.

Now think back a few decades…When we were in our 20’s (or late teens) we looked at the men and women running our companies, our communities and our country, and I know many of us thought of them in sort of abstract terms. We didn’t feel we really knew them (remember Regan?) but for the most part we accepted their leadership because we either respected their experience or we had more pressing things to do as young adults.

Now that the people in power and in leadership positions in our communities and our country are essentially our age, I know I feel a little shaken…in a good way. Those of us born in the late 50’s through the 1960’s are certainly not youngins’. We know a thing or two, we’ve made it through corporate America (bruises and layoffs not withstanding), raised kids and started businesses in record numbers. In fact sometimes I wonder about our younger years. We were far more conformist in our attitudes during our youth than our wilder predecessors (hard-core baby-boomers).

But that little fact doesn’t seem to bother us as much as one might think. We were educated by those baby-boomers and indoctrinated to believe that they were the chosen generation. I remember in grade 7 and 8 learning about Woodstock, the Kennedy’s and how much young people of that era really helped to shape our world…for the better.

My teacher was the spitting image of John Denver, played folk guitar and tried his best to persuade us to choose 60’s rock over the head-banger rock music of the late 70’s.

It’s no wonder we didn’t have that fight in us in our college years…we became a generation taken up with navel gazing  trying to find our own personalities and make a living in the “me” generation of the 80’s. All I can say is thank God the 80’s are behind us and that we’ve grown into the more thoughtful, sensitive, “green loving” adults we are today. And not a moment too soon either.

Our kids, those militant Millennials eating into our retirement money with their college tuition fees and computer expenses, aren’t too thrilled about the way we’ve managed the world up to this point.  There’s no doubt in my mind that they’re going to make us accountable for our promises and our actions. Our work is cut out for us, but I know we’re ready.

ShareThis

Of course the troubled economy is another reason people are planning for self-employment. Since long-term employment isn’t guaranteed anymore, many career gurus suggest it makes good sense to assess your abilities as a business owner when thinking about a career change and ensuring a source of income for yourself and our family.

Once your kids are teens, leave for college or move out on their own, you’ve got the gift of time to spend researching and starting that business you’ve always dreamed of.  If you’re employed, that little extra time that you may find in your day can be directed towards doing the research and planning that forms the foundation of any potentially successful business.

Starting a business while you’re employed is one of the best ways to transition to self-employment especially if you’re not interested in securing major financing for your business and plan to bank roll your start-up yourself.

If there is anything you’ve learned after raising children is that experience is one of the best teachers.  Look at your rich experience as a mother, an employee, a colleague, community volunteer, hobbyist, gardener–all those activities through the years that served to fill up your life.  You’ve got skills and gifts that can be the basis of a great business.  Think about how you can move that self-employment goal from the realm of dreams to reality.

It’s a new year and time’s ticking so make your move and remember you don’t have to venture out into the world of  entrepreneurship alone.  Look  into joining a business mentorship group.  I recommend Mom Masterminds as I’m a member there and find it to be one of the most resource packed private membership groups around for women focused on running successful online businesses.

If you’re looking for some inspriation and ideas for starting a new business try visiting the popular website  ShowMomTheMoney.com. This is a site created by seasoned small business coach for women, Nicole Dean and you’ll find yourself enjoying the valuable resources, guides and tips that are there.

ShareThis

Of course being Cosmopolitan, your horoscope was also guaranteed to have something in it about love and hot romance which was just the ticket for us back then when we were dreamy (and perky) 17 year olds.

Fast forward a few decades and my girlfriends and I are still looking for that inspirational outlook for the new year.  Sure we’re a little less perky and Cosmopolitan doesn’t quite do it for us anymore (and I don’t want to do half the things they suggest we do!), but we still need that new year carrot to kick start our year.

Now that many of us are moms of kids who are off to college, or will be in a few years, we’re looking for a different kind of inspiration.  For me it breaks down this way:

I’ve raised children that give me joy (on the days they’re not driving me insane), I’ve developed a deep love for the fellow on the couch watching the Rose Bowl game (and that took some effort after the honeymoon glow subsided) and I’ve found the career and business that give me satisfaction.

I’m now entering another phase of life.  I want to recapture some of the sizzle of previous years, without losing my sense of comfort. But let me speak in even plainer terms.  I want to lose weight, get back my energy and stop looking like someone’s soccer mom who’s had too many coffee and donuts.

Now that my 40’s are the new 30’s I’m feeling pretty excited about this period in my life.  I know this knocking back the decades game is all a gimmick but I’m actually inspired by that line of thinking!

The truth is we have a lot of living to do after the kids have grown and if we don’t acknowledge that, we’ll be missing out.  Being a mentor to our young adults, starting that business that we always wanted, being of service to those in need and finally seeing those places we always wanted to visit will take energy and resources that we have to cultivate.

So the planner in me is taking control this year and being purposeful about grabbing hold of those things in life that make me smile, think and take action!

The picture in this post is a beach in Ocho Rios, Jamaica.  Every time I visit Jamaica I come back rejuvinated and so inspired.  Some days that picture could just as easily be my backyard! What are the places, people or events that inspire you?

ShareThis

I couldn’t believe it when my daughter asked if I had 15-minutes to waste on Sunday evening.

She had just created a 15-minute flash video with music and special effects layered over original artwork and photographs all created by her.

The fact that she asked if I had 15-minutes “to waste” I know was my daughter’s way of saying that she wasn’t sure if I was going to be bored by this, knowing full well that we are STARVING for any opportunity to view and discuss her art.

Since going off to college we literally live by the phone waiting for her call with any news of advances or challenges beaten during her first year of college.

I have to admit that sometimes it is like pulling teeth to get her to elaborate on her art work. Much like the days when I had to ask her if there was anything in her knapsack for me to read or sign. The only difference now is she’s 10 years older!

Needless to say I was happy to be given 15-mintues to view this video that she had been working on for a good portion of the day. But what I found really gratifying was that we were spending good, quality time going through the frames of her short film and ewwing and awwing at the way she had manipulated the impages with Photoshop and movie-maker. These were sweet moments.

I am seeing glimpses of a young woman emerging from my teen every day…slowly, but surely. She’s still got some work to do regarding adjusting to the college routine, but she’s making progress and it’s good to know that she’s able to discuss her work and her passion more with me now than she ever has in the past.

ShareThis

In addition to becoming the beach region of choice for those visiting Mexico, Cancun is also home to many important Mayan ruins.

Tulum is the ancient Mayan city overlooking the blue-green waters of the Caribbean, with an exceptional beach,, and a truly fascinating history Tulum is a day trip that is a must for many Cancun visitors.

Tulum is one of the most visited of all Mayan ruins, and it’s also the only major Mayan ruin to be found along Mexico’s Caribbean coastline on the “Riviera Maya”.

To read more about Tulum, the Mayan ruins and the hotels of the Mayan Riveria click here.

The picture below was taken by a traveller to Tulum. Time to call your travel agent.

ShareThis