Vanlal.

Long time, no write, eh? The Monk has been busy!

In fact, that’s exactly what I want to talk to you about. No, not the “busy” part, the “Monk” part.

You see, I got out of spiritual healing work for a number of reasons, one of the biggies being that I didn’t like the feeling of charging for spiritually specific work (intuitive work, healing work, business work… sure. No problem. But teaching it? Just didn’t feel right.).

But even though I transitioned to full-time web design, I was still running everything out of MonkAtWork.com, and that just kinda bugged me. I would’ve preferred to have a different home for the web work, and leave the spiritual stuff here.

At the same time, as I worked with a number of clients, I began to realize a few things about the way my clients and I were approaching the design process, including what made a big difference in people’s success levels with their new sites (and, of course, what didn’t). I wanted to rectify those pitfalls, make it better/cheaper/faster/easier for folks, and do it in a way that really played to my strengths, and the strengths of WordPress (my platform of choice).

Long story short: I have a new home for my “web design” services, and it’s going to blow your doors off. Enter: Bright Coconut.

What’s the big diff?

Well, I’m great with WordPress, great with teaching WordPress and webstuff to people (hence, WebFit), but compared to some of the geniuses out there, I’m no graphics pro (that’s what happens when you major in Literature instead of Design…). And I believe that if you’re doing a bunch of custom design work, you should be a designer.

As much as I know solid design, I don’t do design in that create-unique-artwork-from-scratch way… and I didn’t want to let my lack of graphics cred keep my clients—who’ve appreciated my educational/teaching background—from having beautiful sites. I mean, I’m a form-follows-function guy when it comes down to it, but if you don’t have to choose, why should you?

So, at Bright Coconut, I’m thinking of myself more as a “web educator” than a “web designer”, if you get my drift. When you see what I’ve got going on over there, you’ll see what I mean.

The evolution of WebFit

WebFit has been received really well, and still, there were elements about it I knew I wanted to shift. I wanted to make room for different people’s learning speeds, and not have to make people wait months for the next round of classes to begin.

I did a LOT of brainstorming, a LOT of strategic planning, and a LOT of looking at all of this from multiple angles (yes, three planets in Virgo and a double Grand Trine in Air come in handy from time to time), and came up with what I think is going to be a slam dunk. I ran the idea past a few folks, and they all loved it, too.

In a nutshell, I’ve made WebFit into a video-tutorial-based course, along with personal support and exclusive resources, and I even did something unheard of in business these days: I made it less expensive, and gave you more. True!

So, when you check out Bright Coconut, be sure to check out The Solution as well, and you’ll see how WebFit has evolved.

Where does that leave the Monk?

The Monk, and all of his posts and comments and such, will remain here. I honestly can’t say how much I’ll be posting here, since a focus on personal development is honestly no longer much a part of my life.

I still use my tools, and I still believe in the value of living “monkishly”, especially when it comes to one’s work life… and yet it’s much like when people get really interested in a new hobby: they devour every book, turn over every rock they can, looking for more juicy stuff… because that’s what they’re into. It’s their thing.

And yet, if they truly grow, there comes a point where their passion mellows. It’s not as all-consuming anymore, because the new hobby isn’t new anymore; it has integrated itself into their lives.

True, some passions never fade, and they become (a)vocations. PD was mine for a good 15 years or more. But, it’s not anymore, and I want to be fully up-front about that. I’ll still leave these posts here, though, since I still get notes from time-to-time from people who stumble upon them and get value from them. Just don’t expect much new stuff unless I get inspired, ‘kay?

Where does that leave you?

Feel free to take advantage of the posts I have here; there’s some good stuff you can benefit from, if I say so myself.

And if you need a website, or want to get “WebFit” and learn all about how to master your own WordPress-based site, then come join me at Bright Coconut! (And if you’re a Twitter nut, I’ve got both my personal twitter account and a Bright-Coconut-specific twitter account as well.)

lonushi

When it comes to making change in your life, your health, or the health of your business, the #1 item on every “Law of Attraction”-based, personal growth-oriented list is always gratitude.

Why? Because, the logic goes, when you are feeling grateful for something, you’re in a state of appreciation and happiness, which begets a greater state of happiness. The more you get accustomed to feeling good about what you have, the more you get to feel good about, and the more good you feel about what you have, and so on… it’s an ever-growing spiral.

But what if gratitude brings you down?

I have to admit, I used to resist gratitude in a huge way. Not because I have anything against showing appreciation, but because whenever I’d do a practice involving gratitude, I ended up feeling small and unhappy, which is the opposite of what it was supposed to do for me.

Not cool, I thought. Not cool.

But, being the ever-curious guy that I am, I decided to probe a bit deeper into why I was feeling this way, wondering if I could find a way to an effortless, empowering gratitude practice, and away from the depressing version I’d been practicing. So, like I used to do with my healing clients, I watched myself while I expressed my gratitude to see what the problem was.

And right away, I realized that there wasn’t a problem. There were two.

One Problem Was Shame

Sometimes, situations in your life can link negative feelings to something otherwise positive, such as gratitude. When that happens, it can cause feelings of contraction even when, for most people, the same situation would cause feelings of expansion.

My habitual way of cultivating gratitude—and I’m guessing this is pretty common—was to think of something in my life that I was thankful for, and then, just like we’re taught when we’re kids, to thank someone for it.

But remember when you were a kid and you got a gift from someone? There you are, staring down at your brand new Lego castle, or shiny new stuffed animal, and you’re just thrilled. You’re thinking about all the fun you’ll have with your new toy, and your parents, mortified that you might grow up to be socially uncouth someday, jump on your back and say, “What do you say, huh?”

You look at them, steeped in shame, and whimper, “Thank you.”

What a bummer, huh? You’re just jazzed about what life just brought you, and you get shamed into muttering a ‘thanks’ when you aren’t really up for it. Now you feel like a loser for not saying it without being hounded. And so receiving a gift and feeling great about it has now been linked to feelings of shame. How wonderful.

That was my experience to a ‘T’. As soon as I felt gratitude, I felt shame along with it. I felt that I wasn’t good enough for what I’d received. Talk about shutting down the fun factory!

The Other was the Other

I also realized that in addition to the shame piece, my efforts at gratitude were at odds with my spiritual beliefs. Not as if I was saying, “We don’t do gratitude around here,” in the same way some folks don’t believe in vaccinations, reincarnation, or going outside without your head covered.

I’m talking about an incongruity in the sense of not-being-aligned-with-my-experience-of-Oneness. My experience of the Divine has taught me to believe that the Oneness permeates everything in (and out) of creation, and therefore, in the deepest sense of things, there is no “outside”, and no “other”. And, therefore, the idea of thanking something “outside of me” for bringing me something, as if I couldn’t have obtained it otherwise, was really, really stifling.

This ego-centric, disembodied concept of God was really putting a kink in my chances to experience true gratitude, because every time I tried to feel good about something in my life, I reverted to feeling tiny, insignificant, and separate from All That Is. Bummer, huh?

So, in short, the practice of gratitude became a shame-inducing exercise in smallness. Rrrrrrrt! Hit the brakes!

Redefining Gratitude

If you’ve got roadblocks in the way of tapping into feelings of thankfulness and gratitude, it can seriously hamper your efforts to move forward in your life, not to mention put a halt on the growth of your business. I mean, what kind of signal does it send when a taste of success comes your way, and instead of appreciating it, you feel shameful and less than deserving? Geez!

So if you know—or suspect—that this is the case for you, here’s what I recommend:

• Take a moment to quiet your mind, and step into the process of expressing gratitude (if you need a cue for that, try thinking about something in your life you like, and simply say, “thanks.”). Notice what happens inside you, emotionally speaking, and with your thoughts.
• Take whatever bizarre thoughts, painful memories, or incongruous emotions come to the surface and apply your favorite healing technique (mine, EFT, whatever).
• Watch and see what happens to your feelings and thoughts about gratitude.
• And once you feel a good degree of resolution from the past, start visualizing how you’d like gratitude to work for you. You can ask yourself, “If I were to have a practice of gratitude that fit entirely with my beliefs and were to bring me incredible peace, energy, and joy, what would it be?

My new practice allows me to experience a profound state of gratitude and appreciation for everything in my life, and it rekindles the sense of intrinsic connection and flow I share with the Oneness, in a taoist-like sense. It’s empowering and paradigm-changing, and I’m really grateful for it.

And that’s the great thing about this: no matter where you’re coming from, no matter what hand life has dealt you, you can create a new practice, a new relationship, to gratitude that is healthy, positive, and empowering.

And that is something to be grateful for.

Rickydavid

Focus is perhaps one of the most crucial qualities to develop when it comes to bringing your best to work. When you’re focused, you can get incredible amounts of work done in short periods of time. Focus makes staying on task easy. And there’s one question in particular you can ask yourself that’s supposed to inspire herculean amounts of focus.

Now, you’ve no doubt seen this question circulating amongst the well-intentioned, self-help best-seller bookshelves’ residents for years. It’s pulled out time and again as the ultimate refiner of focus, the samurai sword of the cut-through-the-fluff-ers’ arsenal, the go-to tool of the productivity heroes’ utility belts. Ready?

If you only had six months to live, what would you do right now?

Ta da! Answer that question, and all your troubles will be solved, right?

Well…

Answer that question, yes.

Like Leo says—and I agree with him completely—it can be a great reminder when the minutiae of life starts sucking you down like quicksand. It’s a great question for the moments when you get so fixated on busy-work that you’ve lost sight of what matters to you. It’s also a great question to keep in mind as you’re establishing your life’s priorities and goals, and writing New Year’s Resolutions (assuming anyone still does that anymore), and vacation planning (New Jersey, or Bali? Hmm…).

But, don’t use it when you should be asking something else.

When it comes to planning the vision of your company, this is perhaps the last question you should be asking. Unfortunately, it’s often pulled out in circumstances like this, because it’s seen as the end-all, be-all question. But it’s no Leatherman question, believe me. Why not?

Because this question gives you a view of your life that’s illusionary.

What, are you saying we’re going to live forever? No, silly… at least not physically.

But chances are pretty good that you’re going to be here longer than that… and you’d better plan for it.

If you were only going to live another six months, and knew it ahead of time, do you think you’d be solely concerned with the actions of your business? Hardly. You’d be looking at ways to get in as much family time, quality time, and personal time as possible. You’d be spending your time connecting with the people in your life that matter to you, getting your affairs in order, and maybe slipping in a few once-in-a-lifetime activities. I know I would.

What I wouldn’t be doing is revising my Facebook profile, blogging, twittering (much ), and I darn sure wouldn’t be redesigning my dream website.

Assuming, though, that you are going to be around longer, your questions change considerably. Ask yourself, instead, “If I was going to live another 40, 50, or 60 years, what would I be doing?”

Your answers change, don’t they. They probably change a lot.

Instead of thinking, “Skysurfing over Cozumel,” now you’re thinking, “Change the so-and-so industry,” or, “Expand my business internationally,” or, “Make a difference in the lives of every child in Ghana.” Not that it has to be ultra-grandiose, either… you could be thinking, “Grow my business to where I can sell it/retire in enough time to enjoy my grandkids.” Ultimately, it doesn’t matter what you come up with.

What matters is that you’re thinking about your life, not your endgame.

The problem I have with the six-months-to-live question is that it tends to obliterate the more common reality that you’re going to be here a while. You’ve got a chance to make an impact, in whatever way that matters to you. You’ve got a chance to make something of your self, your life, and your contribution to others.

The balance, of course, is to live for the moment at the same time you’re living for seven generations. Both perspectives are vital, and they aren’t mutually exclusive. You can do amazing things in the time you have, and have amazing times in the things you do. It takes focus, of course… and it also takes a realist’s eye to see where and how to apply it.

So…

If you only forty years to live, what would you do right now?

Maybe you’d start taking your business more seriously. Maybe you’d take your health more seriously, or think a bit more about the person you share a bed with — or want to. Maybe you’d think of better ways to invest in your relationship with your kids.

Maybe you’d start reaching out and connecting with people more. Maybe you’d revise your Facebook profile, blog about something you love, start twittering (a lot ), and for darn sure, it’d be a good idea to start redesigning your dream website.

Is the ‘six month’ question useless?

Heavens, no. Overused? Probably. But still useful, in the right context, along with the other questions that take into account the much more likely scenario.

The question is, what would you do? Think about both questions, “six months” and “forty years”, and post your first thoughts to the comments, would you? I think it would be really helpful to see what others come up with.

Malingering

As I was bouncing around on Twitter the other day, I saw someone ask the question, “What do you do for your mind, body, and spirit?” It’s easy, of course, to answer that question with three answers. “Oh, I’m cleaning up my diet, I exercise a few days a week, and I meditate.” Nothing wrong with an answer like that… it means you’re looking after yourself.

But being the between-the-lines kinda guy that I am, I wanted to answer the question not with three answers, but with one. And so naturally, my answer was “CrossFit.”

Now, I never would have answered that question with any other fitness/exercise/sport that I’ve done (except maybe Nomadics), and I’ve done tons: intercollegiate rowing, yoga (bikram’s, ashtanga, hatha), triathlons, tai chi, full-contact martial arts, bodybuilding, you name it. Why?

Because you’ve got to embrace the suck.

Jon Gilson of Again Faster says it excellently in this must-read article:

When the knurling scrapes your shins, and your traps bunch into knots, you’ll make a decision, one that will affect every aspect of your life. Give in to the agony, and you will always give in. Cave to demands that crush you, and you’ll always cave. Roll to the floor, and you’ll always exist beneath those who choose to stand.

In order to make it through gruesome ordeals, you have to find a place in yourself that wants to overcome. Rising up to meet a challenge, toughing it out when high tide comes your way, and gritting your teeth and not giving up are the price of admission to success.

When you dig deep and muster up a performance that you weren’t sure you had in you, that teaches you something. It teaches you that you are strong, that you can withstand Shakespeare’s “slings and arrows”, and that your character, being what it is, is sufficient to the task.

“Embracing the suck,” then, is the hallmark of a champion. If you can look at a challenge, know it’s going to bite you in the ass, and still get yourself up to the starting line, then you’re playing the game for real.

You may not like it, but it’s true.

I know this may not sit well in today’s personal growth culture, where you can’t take a strong stance without the words compassion! and empathy! being hissed at you like you’re a demonic drill sergeant, just waiting to pound anything soft within range into cold, hard submission.

Now, before you write me off as a heartless bastard, know that I fully understand the roles of compassion, empathy, and proper timing. Too much, too fast, and you’ll burn out your engine, whether it’s your physical engine or your spiritual one. There are times when pushing means pushing too hard, and you do need to back off and give yourself a break.

But if you’re always giving yourself a break, and don’t have a mechanism in place that will take you past your comfort zones, you’ll never grow. And in my estimation, that would be worse than having never pushed too far.

It doesn’t have to be CrossFit, of course.

I’m not saying CrossFit is the only way. I’m not saying the path of the heart doesn’t have a thousand manifestations. And I’m not saying that there’s any one way to truth.

I am saying, though, that you have to find a way to go beyond who you’ve been. And in the rounded-corner world that most of us live in, there are precious few opportunities to see the kind of person you are, and forge yourself into something more.

And personally, I happen to love physical exercise. I love the movement of muscle and bone, the expression of intention through physical activity, and the grace and poise that athletics can bring to its devotees. Maybe it’s because I grew up overweight and sedentary for so many years that I’ve come to appreciate the joy of feeling my body do what it can. I don’t need to ruminate on it anymore, honestly, trying to find a concise “why”; it’s a joyous, happy part of my life, one that I’m immensely grateful for.

Again, from Jon Gilson’s article,

Remember that the walls of the gym are nothing more than physical barriers, meant only to separate us from the elements. What you do within those walls will echo in your daily life, and you would do well to choose your actions wisely.

And that’s just it, isn’t it?

What you do in one area of your life echoes through the rest of it, doesn’t it? You can’t compartmentalize anything. It all plays together, it all makes a difference, and it all matters.

How you rest is how you eat is how you work is how you dream is how you love. What you bring to one, you bring to another.

cayusa

As you can see, things have changed a bit around here. You could call it a redesign, but I think of it more as a realign.

So, what’s new?

On the design front:

• A sidebar—of sorts—is back, making it easier to find related content. This will expand over time, I’m sure, but for now, the “meta data” of each post are there, allowing you more access to more information more easily. The addition of the sidebar also reduces the width of the general content area, making for improved readability.
• The big pre-footer area has more info. This, too, will grow with time… but for now, there are more ways to connect with me, including Facebook links and a Twitter feed.
• A shift in typography. What can I say? I’m a mac guy, through and through. I think in Lucida Grande. And for my non-mac-using brothers and sisters, you should find yourself looking at either Calibri, Lucida Sans Unicode, or Helvetica. Call it a style thing, but I like it much better this way. And since it’s my little slice of the web, I can do what I want, right?
• Improved navigation. In addition to the new nav links at the top, astute observers will also notice breadcrumb links as well. I’ve also cleaned up the archive and search pages, too, in case you use those.

And, on the content front:

• A new workshop, called “WebFit.” I’ll have a dedicated post about this soon, since I’m so excited about it, but for now, you can always check out the workshop page itself. Website fluency, with a CrossFit twist.
• The blog is front and center again. Since m@w 2.0 came along, I’ve had a static page as the home page, and the blog was relegated to a sub-page. I’ve moved the blog back to the home page, though, since what it’s really all about is you getting what you need easily. (I got tired of typing “/blog/”, anyhow.)

And there’s more cool stuff coming soon, too.

There’s a big project on the way, too, that I think will be very exciting. It’s just not quite ready to come out of the oven, yet… but it will be soon. (I have a tendency to underbake stuff, in business as well as in the kitchen, and it’s a tendency I’ve been working hard to correct.)

And although I could write and write about this—and knowing me, I most likely will—the big shift in Monk at Work 2.1 isn’t about the site’s design, or about the workshop at all. It’s about the re-realization that the inner side of how we work sets the stage for everything else. And even though my spiritual beliefs have, and probably always will, be in a state of evolution, that’s probably true for us all. And how without that conversation happening, m@w is just another web design site, or just another productivity/organizational/whatever site, and that’s, well, boring.

So, are you going to see more about web design and WordPress from me? You sure are. Am I going to keep writing about spirit, intuition, and matters of mind and heart? Absolutely. CrossFit? Yep… especially as it pertains to my unfolding journey of the well-being and development of mind, body, and spirit.

Because when it comes down to it, my journey has always been one of making the most of what’s inside me so I can make the most outside me as well. And as I see it, that’s where my place is, and where we can have the juiciest conversations.

So, as always, to be continued.

(and thanks to @trib of Acid Labs for the heads up…)

Recently on Smashing Magazine, there was a fantastic article by Jean-Baptiste Jung of Cats Who Code, called 10 Killer WordPress Hacks. Now, many times when you see a title like that, you probably do the same thing I do: yawn. Because you know as well as I do that out of those 10, only two or three are probably going to be any good.

Au contraire this time, my friends. Jean-Baptiste rocked the house with this one. I was already using one of his tricks, I immediately put three of them into practice while reading the article, and two more are on my to-do list (you’ll see them in effect very soon, when Monk at Work goes to 2.1…). It only took me about ten minutes, tops.

But I’m a code-happy web monk.

I realize that what I can do in three minutes might take you thirty, at least, just because you’re doing other things during your day besides coding, and I, on the other hand, do a lot of it.

So, because Twitter and blogging are getting to be so much more widespread these days, I thought I’d break down “Tip #5: Create a ‘Send to Twitter’ Button” for you, in case you’ve got a more complicated installation than just adding a link. If your theme uses images along with your links, as one of my client’s sites does, then just adding the code is going to break your visual layout, and make you look like a hack.

We can’t let that happen now, can we?

Send to Twitter, with CSS Image Sprites

A css sprite—because I know that’s your next question—is a really cool way of creating two-in-one rollover images. You see, when you have an image that’s a link, and you want it to change color when you roll over it, you can:

• use two separate images… but that makes your reader’s browsers have to load two images, which slows down your site, or
• use one image file that contains both images, set apart from each other, and use css to get it to work right.

Because of the problem inherent in the two-image method, most worth-their-salt theme designers will use sprites for instances like we’re talking about here. If you look at the code I’m going to describe in just a minute, you’ll know if your theme uses sprites, too, and if you can use this technique, or not.

Now, I’m not going to show you how to create css sprites from scratch, because there are plenty of articles out there that do, and they’re great. And besides, the idea behind this tutorial is that you’re using a WordPress theme that already uses sprites, and you just need to know how to duplicate what your theme’s designer has already done.

That said, let’s get this wagon rolling already!

1. Get into the code

Here’s the original code from Jean-Baptiste:

<a href="http://twitter.com/home?status=Currently reading <?php the_permalink(); ?>" title="Click to send this page to Twitter!" target="_blank">Share on Twitter</a>

This will produce a simple text link, like this: Share on Twitter, but that’s it. If you want it to match your existing styles, you’re going to have to style it up a bit.

As an example theme, I’m going to use my client’s site. What we’ve got are links that look like this:

If you open up the index.php file, and find the code of the links, you’ll see they all look like something like this:

<li class="post_stumble"><a title="Click here to stumbleupon this post" href="http://www.stumbleupon.com/submit?url=<?php the_permalink() ?>&amp;title=<?php the_title();?>">Stumbleupon</a></li>

(If that’s not something you think you can find on your own, then I highly recommend you grab a brilliant Firefox extension called Firebug. It will allow you to “look beyond the Matrix” and see the code that makes up any element on any website. It rocks. Get it. It’s that indispensible.)

Now, copy-n-paste the existing code that you see, change the class name, and add in the ‘share on Twitter’ code, so it looks like this:

<li class="post_twitter"><a href="http://twitter.com/home?status=Currently reading <?php the_permalink(); ?>" title="Click to send this page to Twitter!" target="_blank">Twitter</a></li>

Duplicate this in the single.php and archive.php, to be sure the Twitter link is on both the blog index, the individual post’s page, and the site’s archives, and you’re all set. (Those three files should be the only place this code is called, unless you have a very pimped out theme… be sure you look through your theme’s files to see if there’s anywhere else this code would be called on, such as category.php, page.php, or search.php…)

2. Create the Image Sprite

Now that you’ve got the structure in place, it’s time to create the sprite image.

Chances are, the existing sprite images are in your theme’s images folder (but you can always double-check by using Firebug and/or combing the css file). Find an existing image, and open it in a photo editing program. I use Fireworks, but there are plenty to choose from.

What you’ll see is that there are two images in one; the ‘resting’ state, and the ‘hover’ state. You’re going to want to match those two styles exactly with your new Twitter images. In this case, I need a greyscale ‘t’ and a full-color ‘t’, so it’s off to Google Image search to grab a Twitter ‘t’, and open it in Fireworks.

Next, shrink down your Twitter image so it’s the same size as the example image you’re using. Duplicate it, and apply whatever style is necessary to make it look like the second image. In my case, I used a command tool to make it greyscale with one click; depending on your image editor, you may need to desaturate it or something else.

Now, align the two images so they’re exactly like the example sprite you pulled from your theme. They should look like this:

Upload your new twitter sprite so it sits alongside the others.

3. CSS Time!

Now open up your theme’s stylesheet, most likely the style.css file.

Duplicate the code used to make the example image you used do its sprite dance (again, use Firebug if you have a hard time finding it), and change the class name and image name to your new twitter class and name.

Here’s the original css:

.postmetadata li.post_stumble a { display:block; float:left; height:14px; padding-top:2px; background:url(images/bk_stumble.png) bottom left no-repeat; padding-left:20px; }
.postmetadata li.post_stumble a:hover { background:url(images/bk_stumble.png) top left no-repeat; }

And here’s the duplicated css along with the original:

.postmetadata li.post_stumble a { display:block; float:left; height:14px; padding-top:2px; background:url(images/bk_stumble.png) bottom left no-repeat; padding-left:20px; }
.postmetadata li.post_stumble a:hover { background:url(images/bk_stumble.png) top left no-repeat; }
.postmetadata li.post_twitter a { display:block; float:left; height:14px; padding-top:2px; background:url(images/bk_twitter.png) bottom left no-repeat; padding-left:20px; }
.postmetadata li.post_twitter a:hover { background:url(images/bk_twitter.png) top left no-repeat; }

That should do the trick. Save and upload everything, and test it. Let’s take a look…

Voila!

 dirtyfeet

This post is just another form of procrastination. Ignore it.

No, don’t ignore it. Learn from it.

What do you do in order to not do what you need to be doing?

Not what you should be doing, because we all know what happens when you ‘should’ on yourself… but what you need to be doing. There’s a difference.

What’s the difference?

The difference is that ‘shoulds’ are tasks that are often being dictated by a plan. A plan you’ve agreed to at one point or another, but a plan nonetheless.

The ‘needs’ are that which have to be done, or else you don’t make it. What ‘it’ is will be different for us all; for some, it’s survival, for others it’s success, and others, signficance.

I’m not saying that just because ‘shoulds’ come from a plan, you shouldn’t do them. Or that needs always trump them. I’m not saying that at all.

I’m just saying that it’s good to notice where your motivation is coming from before leaving one task to move on to another, so don’t end up wasting time, your most precious resource.

That said, I won’t take up any more of yours… or mine. Back to it, now!

moriza

Why, in seemingly every tradition, are there ritual practices?

Because rituals work, that’s why. They work through repetition; through continual practice, the attentive mind learns the steps until they are memorized. Once the mind’s focus is no longer needed to complete the ritual, it goes on “auto-pilot”, and the adept can repeat the ritual and focus the mind deeper, awakening the heart/soul/whatever (depends on the ritual, of course). This allows for a much deeper level of presence to be had, transforming the result of the ritual, and the mind of the practitioner.

Or, as my martial arts teacher would say, “First, the mind teaches the body what to do. Then, the body refines the movement, teaching the mind how it wants to move. Finally, body and mind are united as one.” He also said that once you performed an action 10,000 times, you had it mastered.

Clearly, rituals rock. In disciplines such as spirituality, or martial arts, that’s a no-duh statement. But what about in your work day? Do you have rituals?

If you answered no, allow me to differ. Uh, email? Twitter? Checking your voice mail?

And those are just the ubiquitous ones… depending on what line of work you’re in, you’ve probably got a bunch more. Here are some of mine:

• Health: CrossFit, 4-5 days a week. And if you think CrossFit doesn’t count as a ritual, you don’t know CrossFitters! We check the Workout of the Day (WOD) religiously, the star-performers of CrossFit are like heroes, and we read the CrossFit Journal like it’s a holy text. Trust me; don’t get in between a CrossFitter and his/her workout.
• Personal Growth: I have a set of practices I do regularly designed to enhance my sense of connection, develop my focus, and keep me moving towards the future I envision. These include gratitude, visualization, self-healing, and more (I’ll be sharing more about this as time goes on, in case anyone’s curious…).
• Business: I write, tweet, and email, like many do. I also regularly search for web design and development knowledge, reading feeds of favorite designers and design compendiums, investigating WordPress plugins and theme developments, etc.

There are more, of course, but you get the idea.

In my mind, these all qualify as rituals, because the more I do them, the more aware I am of the effects of the practice themselves, and the more I transform as a person through doing them (yes, even through Twitter). They make me better at what I do, of course… but it would be easy to do any of these and not get the same benefits.

What makes the difference? Intention. Have the intention to carry your focus and presence deeper as you do your daily rituals, and see what happens. If you’ve never thought of your work as potential for ritual before, take a moment and reflect on your day… where does this idea of ritual make perfect sense?

Some days are just meh.

Of course, some days you’re on, and some days you aren’t. Some days, email is just email. Meditation is just sitting there. Chanting is just mindless blather. After all, I’m no Master Oogway, either.

But that’s not a deficiency in the ritual, it’s a lack of intention and presence. Any regular activity can be transformed into ritual with the proper mindset.

So, if you notice yourself out of the groove one day, you’ve got a choice: Hop back up into the saddle, or let it go, and just be where you’re at (that’s called ‘acceptance’). There’s always another day.

What rituals do you use?

Infinity Rain

Okay, so I’ve got 3 planets in Virgo, and a double-grand-trine (and two T-squares) in Air. What does that mean? For those of us (‘cause I’m one of ‘em) who don’t have much of a background in astrology, it basically means I’m frogged.

Not really. It means I’m smart. Yay for me. But it also means I’m a perfectionist out the wazoo, so all these great ideas I have? All the amazing connections I see between things? All the creative impulses I have? They ride on the backs of turtles, past huge guardians of Quality Control, on their slow march towards freedom. It’s a wonder you’re even reading this. But who knows, you might not - I might edit this before I publish it.

I’m not alone, I know this.

You’re probably a perfectionist, too. And if you aren’t, you’ve probably got enough of an internal censor to grasp what I’m saying, even though you may not be bleeding in the trenches with the rest of us. If that’s you, well, good on ya; pass the gauze, will you?

Perfectionism, in its most beautiful out-picturing, is a valiant effort to maintain a degree of quality that you feel the world deserves. It’s a beautiful place, this world of ours, and dadgum, if you’re going to contribute something to it, it should be as beautiful as the rest, right? “Quality is job #1”, and all that. What a wonderful intention!

Perfectionism, unfortunately, also has a downside. When it’s ugly, it’s really not much more than fear of judgment projected outwards. You fear judgment, so you edit and polish and edit some more until either the thing shines, or withers away to nothingness, with no more substance than those dry, crackly vanilla wafer cookie things they sell at Quickie-Marts.

The bummer, then, is that all too often, your brilliance never gets shared with others. It stays hidden, behind the censors of your fear and doubt, until it dies of loneliness and boredom.

The bigger bummer is that the stuff that does go out tends to have two (okay, three) kinds of reception:

1. Either people love it… which makes your censors now tell you you have an even higher level of quality to live up to, or
2. People love it, but they miss the humanity in it. Because you’ve done them the unfortunate disservice of removing so much of you, so much of your process from it, that they miss out on the learning of what you, as a human being, actually went through to create it. Which, most likely, is 90% of what they’re thirsty for.
3. People hate it. But y’know what? Everybody hates something, and somebody hates everything. You can’t win ‘em all; you can only die trying. If somebody hates it, move on. If you use failure to beat yourself up, you’re only helping the censors.

I’m perfectly aware that this post may be loved. And if it is, great. That’s not why I’m writing it, but great. I’m writing it to help, in case there are others like me out there.

And, you may also think it sucks cheese. If you do, go ahead, unsubscribe, click away, or act like a troll in the comment box. It’ll only save me the pressure of feeling I have to perform better next time.

Because whether you like it or not, I’m here to stay.

And that’s what you need to tell your censors, too. You’re here to stay. The part of you that wants to share, to connect, to help, to give — it’s not going away based on the judgments of others, nor because of the rude comments your censors make. You’ve got a voice, and by god, you’re going to use it (no pressure, mind you).

So do it, whatever it is: Write it. Play it. Create it. Design it. Sing it. Build it. Get it out there. Sound that barbaric yawp of yours to the world, brothers and sisters.

Why? Because we need it. We need it so we can shut our own censors up long enough for us to give what we’ve got to give. Because the gems of greatness exist within us, but they need practice to develop, and room to breathe. Because when it comes down to it, even the stuff that most people would call semi-decent can be the catalyst for one person’s dramatic, life-changing epiphany.

So be the example of bravery for someone else. Create, so someone else will, too.