Moral Metric

Review of The Disaster Movie

Diane Hollenbeck — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 21:42:02 +0000

The hero of this parody, Will, learns through a very odd prophecy from a fanged Amy Winehouse the world will come to an end on August 29, 2008. Will initially decides not to tell his girlfriend he loves her, but when disasters begin to happen, he determines the only way to save the world is to declare his love and perform some weird ritual with crystal skulls. “The Disaster Movie” follows the pattern of its predecessors in crude humor and vulgar sexual content. The laughs are minimal but the filthy language and innuendo flow freely.

Review of Babylon A.D.

Diane Hollenbeck — Mon, 01 Sep 2008 21:26:44 +0000

Mercenary Toorop is hired by a rich warlord to transport a mysterious young woman named Aurora and her guardian Sister Rebeka from a convent in Mongolia to New York City. As the trio set out on their journey, Toorop begins to notice that Aurora has special skills, and he must decide if he is handing her over to the right people or setting her up for destruction. “Babylon A.D.” is wrought with excessive violence and filthy language. Most disturbing is the negative attitude towards Christianity.

Review of Traitor

Diane Hollenbeck — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 04:16:21 +0000

Muslim-American Samir Horn tries to fit his pious lifestyle into his dangerous occupation of espionage, but after he is thrown into prison for selling arms to the enemy, he is recruited by an Islamic terrorist and becomes a key component of some very volatile missions of destruction. Horn’s every move is being monitored by FBI agent Clayton, and while Horn is trying to figure out how to preserve life while infiltrating the violent terrorist group, Clayton is trying to understand the person of Samir Horn and whose side he is really on. “Traitor” contains tons of violence and profanity.

Review of Mirrors

Diane Hollenbeck — Sat, 30 Aug 2008 03:44:16 +0000

Ex-detective Ben Carson is pulling night duty security at a gutted, old department story in order to try to piece together his life after accidentally shooting a colleague. He swears to his wife that he is getting better, yet Ben begins to struggle again when the highly polished mirrors in the abandoned building he patrols begin to reflect gruesome images which prove difficult for Ben to handle. “Mirrors” is replete in blood, gore, grisly effects, reference to the demonic, and vulgar language.

Review of The Rocker

Diane Hollenbeck — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 02:38:13 +0000

When Fish, the drummer for a band called Vesuvius, was suddenly booted from the group, he was left angry, bitter, and without a dream, especially when the band went platinum. Now fast forward twenty years—while Fish has gotten older, he hasn’t grown up; so when the band that his nephew is part of needs a drummer for a prom gig, Fish jumps at another chance to make it big. Even after Fish ruins the prom gig, his nephew’s band gets plenty of publicity due to the videos on YouTube of Fish practicing in the nude. “The Rocker” contains very crass and vulgar language as well as some nudity.

Review of The Longshots

Diane Hollenbeck — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 02:31:42 +0000

In the depressed town of Minden, Curtis is just one of many unemployed individuals; so as a favor to his sister-in-law, he watches over his niece Jasmine who doesn’t particularly enjoyed being babysat by a person for whom she holds little regard. Things change, however, when Curtis finds out that Jasmine can throw a football, and he gets the football coach of the local team to give her a chance; then the football team begins to win again, and everybody’s hope is restored. “The Longshots” contains some rough language and some profanity.

Review of Vicky Cristina Barcelona

Diane Hollenbeck — Thu, 28 Aug 2008 02:28:16 +0000

While vacationing in Barcelona, opposite friends Vicky and Cristina both meet the man of their dreams, unfortunately it is the same man; however, Spanish artist Juan Antonio is more than willing to accommodate both women for a weekend fling at a beautiful secluded resort. Even though Juan excites Vicky, she returns home to her stable fiancée while Cristina, consumed by the passionate artist, chooses to stay with him even when his loony ex-wife moves back in. “Vicky Cristina Barcelona” contains some very questionable sexual situations.

Review of Hamlet 2

Diane Hollenbeck — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 23:22:12 +0000

Failed actor-turned-high school drama teacher Dana Marschz believes that there is power and magic in live theatre, so when his drama program is going to be cut at the end of the semester, he writes and produces a sequel to Shakespeare’s tragedy Hamlet. As word about Marschz’s play and its unorthodox content gets around, controversy ensues; and when Marschz is canned, the students with the help of the ACLU make sure the show goes on. “Hamlet 2” is vulgar and irreverent in its attempts at humor. There is some nudity and graphic drug use.

Review of Tropic Thunder

Diane Hollenbeck — Wed, 27 Aug 2008 02:10:55 +0000

A group of actors with questionable skills and a lot of personal baggage are cast in an expensive war drama; however, when a costly special effect blows the jungle set to pieces, the greedy director takes the show on the road. Unfortunately, the drug lords whose turf is being trespassed upon by the movie shoot are not aware of the fact that the men dressed as commandos are actually actors, and the actors don’t immediately catch on to the fact that the action and tribulation they are experiencing is very real; due to the confusion, mayhem ensues. “Tropic Thunder” has very graphic violence and gore. The language is also very rough. Additionally, the film features the liberal usage of a disparaging term used to describe the mentally disabled.

Review of The House Bunny

Diane Hollenbeck — Sun, 24 Aug 2008 16:05:12 +0000

After Playboy bunny Shelley Darlington is booted from the Hefner’s mansion for being too old (27 years old), she stumbles upon a sorority in need of some tender loving care, and Shelley immediately finds her calling as a dorm mom who imparts all the knowledge she gained at the Playboy Mansion to help her unpopular, geeky charges become more desirable. As she works to accomplish this goal, Shelley learns many lessons along the way, and her life becomes less superficial. “The House Bunny” is replete in bikini-clad women and sex talk.