Happiness is something that we all strive for, isn’t it? At the end of the day, we just want to feel good and enjoy our lives and families. With the amount of stress that is part and parcel of many of our lives, is it any wonder that we’re all looking for that holy grail of contentment, whichever way we can get it?

If you’re a parent, you probably feel like many of us do – that happiness begins at home. After all, when we’re able to kick back, relax and enjoy our families, there’s nothing more satisfying and nothing like it.

I was recently part of a great discussion with some other moms who provided insight about the subject of families, parenting and happiness. It was great to realize that we all march to the beat of our own drum, and at the end of the day, we do what we need to do to make our kids – and ourselves – happy.

You can check out the full conversation here, on the McCain All Good Blog.

How do you find happiness with your family?

The post It’s All Good – It Really Is! appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

Helicopter Parents vs. Free Range Parents.

Elimination Communication vs. conventional potty training.

Tiger Moms vs. Permissive Moms.

Apparently there’s a war of not only words but ways of life and parents are being made to draw a line in the sand…or  sandbox as the case may be.

Depending on your vantage point, you may be in the right or you may be totally wrong. You are likely doing wonderful things for your child or you are ruining them as human beings forevermore. You just can’t win.

Never  has there been a time in our history where there have been so many  different ways of parenting and, more importantly, so many parents arguing, disagreeing and generally condemning those who choose to raise their children in a different way than their own.

Add to this fact the reality that our multi-ethnic, socially-stratified society adds even more variables to the mix, including culture and ethnicity as well as social economic class, to name a few. Is it any wonder that there are almost as many ways of raising your child as there are children in the world (alright, not quite, but it certainly seems that way)?

Yet, although most of us know this, we stick to our guns, insisting that our way is the right way. Perhaps it’s human nature; perhaps it’s our stubborn belief that we’re right and…well…everyone who doesn’t agree with us is wrong. No more so than in the parenting plane are those who continue to bicker and argue about what is the best way to raise a child. If you’re not with us, you’re against us, end of story.

Though intellectually, we know that this type of rigid, black-and-white viewing of the world is wrong, we can’t help ourselves. Somehow it’s not wrong when it comes to us and our choices on how we raise our kids. Again: we’re right, everyone else is wrong…right?

So the question this week is as follows: Do you think that it’s possible for us to finally all get along? Can conflicting and different parenting styles exist? Is there any hope of us finding common ground and celebrating our similarities as parents instead of our differences? Let me know what you think in the comments below!

VIDEO: Can’t We All Just Get Along?

Image courtesy of www.sheknows.ca

The post Monday Musings – Can’t We All Just Get Along? appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

I was the in-studio guest for CBC Radio’s Ontario Today program just in advance of Mother’s Day. The topic at hand was Mother’s Day Gifts, specifically the best and worst ever received. Listen to the entire segment below for some interesting stories of Mothers’ Days past. Some of the gifts given as told by the phone-in listeners are pretty incredible to say the least!

Click on the link below to listen to the full interview:

CBC Radio Ontario Today – What Was Your Best and Worst Mother’s Day Gift?

Image courtesy of http://ca.shine.yahoo.com

The post CBC RADIO INTERVIEW: Best and Worst Mother’s Day Gifts appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

Following my post regarding best practices for families about Emergency Preparedness, I was asked to return to the Global Morning Show to discuss. Armed with an Home Emergency Kit based on the information found at Toronto Hydro’s site, I was ready to go.

Watch below for tips and advice about what all homes should have available in the event of an emergency.

VIDEO: Emergency Preparedness Tips For Families

Image courtesy of www.carp.ca

The post VIDEO: Emergency Preparedness Tips For Families: Global Morning Show Segment appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

You pass her on the street and give her nary a glance.

That frail old woman, doddering and slow, walking along with a cane.

Poor thing, you think. And then you move on.

You go about your day, perhaps on to work; then to the grocery store for a few items, then on home to the family. Dinner awaits, after all, and you are head cook.

Because of this, your wonderful husband and lovely children are going to take you out for a well-deserved brunch in celebration of Mother’s Day this Sunday. After all, you deserve it. You’ve loved, cared for, sacrificed and encouraged your kids like no other, and they appreciate you. You’re a good mom.

Oh – and remember that frail old woman that you passed in the street earlier? So is she.

That unremarkable wisp of a person has a remarkable story, for anyone who would care to listen, for she – like you – has done her share of scrimping, saving, sacrificing and soothing, and then some. She’s not only done it for her kids, but for the kids of her kids and perhaps, even, yet another generation of little ones. Grandma, great-grandma, aunt, friend and sister – she is all of these things and more.

She wiped the tears away from more than a few crying children before any of us were born. She raised a family, then stepped in to help raise her children’s families as well. She was the nice neighbourhood mom whom all the kids loved. She was one of the more active members of her kid’s school PTA. She did all of the mundane “mom” things that we all do, and did it probably more often than all of us. She knows the meaning of  “mom” like no other.

Yet her contribution to motherhood is often forgotten in the bloom of youth. After all, moms, as many of us see them are younger, more vibrant, more alive. Ironic, really, because this mother, grandmother, great-grandmother – well, she’s lived alright. She’s lived a thousand lifetimes of 4am feedings, dirty diapers, teen angst and college convocations. And remember – she’s done so for more than one generation of kids.

We often pass her by on the street; a natural reaction, after all. She’s nondescript, elderly and often unnoticeable, but only because we’ve chosen not to notice. She doesn’t stand out in the crowd so why should we look twice? It’s human nature to overlook things that blend into our surroundings, this is true, but should this also be the case for people? She may not look like our idea of a “mom” but she is one, through and through.

What is it about our society and culture that embraces youth so desperately while at the same time, discards anything – or anyone – who has the slightest tinge of age? How can it be that a sage of a person who as the wisdom of time as well as the battle scars of service be tossed aside as we go about our daily lives, often so self-possessed and myopic about our own entitlement? Why do we not remember the love and sacrifices of the older generation of mothers who are often now long forgotten by not only society but worse – their children and grandchildren?

As we walk down the street we are passing many moms, grandmothers, aunts and sisters, all of whom have played a vital role as a motherly figure in so many lives. That homeless woman with the shopping cart, the strange and cranky old lady across the street, that quirky “cat lady” colleague who’s now mothering only felines – they all have stories to tell, many of them involving their kids. If only we’d take the time to listen. This Mother’s Day, let’s remember all of the mothers who have contributed so much to our lives yet have so often become forgotten.

For they are mothers too.

To read this article on Huffington Post, click here.

Image courtesy of www.greengazette.blogspot.com

The post On Mother’s Day, Remember Them All appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

*In an effort to support emergency preparedness and family safety, Multiple Mayhem Mamma is partnering with Toronto Hydro to offer easy-to-follow tips and advice to parents*

An Emergency Preparedness Checklist – Top 10 Tips For Families

The week of May 5^th to 11^th is Emergency Preparedness Week in Canada. An annual event, the first week of May signals an opportunity for people to make sure that they’re ready for any eventuality that may occur in their homes. After all, with the unexpected severe weather events of recent years, is it any wonder that emergency power outages are not uncommon?

Emergency preparedness is particularly important in families with children in the home. Not only should parents make sure that their kids know fire drills and how and when to act in emergency situations; they should also make sure that kids are well-versed on where certain items are in the home, and where to find them in the event of an emergency. Kids can be particularly affected by change and the unknown; for these reasons, parents should assure that they are not only prepared for emergencies, but that their kids are as well.

Following is An Emergency Preparedness Checklist – Top 10 Tips For Families

1)  Money, Money, Money – We all love money, but never more so than when we really need it and may not be able to get it. Many of us forget that in an instance of a power outage or similar event, bank machines and access credit are down – often leaving us in the lurch. With children in the mix, it’s important to have access to funds, which may be needed to purchase food supplies, medicine, etc. Make sure to always have a supply of cash on hand to cover expenses for a short period of time. It may be sufficient to have $50-$75; just make sure that the money is broken down into smaller denominations such as $10 bills so that change for payphones and other incidentals is easily attained.

2)  Doctor in the House – A First Aid Kit is key to being prepared for any type of emergency. In times of crisis, it may not be possible to get medical attention or help as quickly as we would like. Because of this, having a First Aid Kit that includes some standard items such as bandages and gauze, medication (Advil, Tylenol and related children’s doses) and more is more important than ever. The point is to be prepared until further medical help arrives. Check your kit regularly to make sure that all items are replenished.

3)  Food, Glorious Food – In addition to the First Aid Kit, it’s important to have a supply of emergency food and water that will last your family for a full 72 hours. While that may seem like a long period of time to be without power or to be in the midst of an emergency, you just never know, so why not be prepared? It’s always better to err on the side of caution.  If you’re like me, you might even include some treats to help alleviate the nervousness or to barter for better behavior!

4)  Entertainment:  Make sure to include things that you can entertain the kids with in your kit. It’s pretty much a sure bet that after the first hour they’ll start to stir, and complain that there’s nothing to do.  For younger children you can easily print off a list of games to play in the dark. Also look for a site that provides a good checklist of all the things you’ll need.  Remember as well to pack some books, toys, and a deck of cards.

5)  In a Flash – Of course a flashlight seems like a no-brainer as part of an emergency kit, but did you know that battery-powered or wind-up flashlights are the best in situations like this? Without having to rely on electrical power (or batteries in some instances), these items will prove to be priceless when the lights suddenly go out.

6)  Charge it! – Having a smart phone is of little use if it’s not charged. In the event of a sudden emergency, you may have to make a call from your wireless phone. If possible, have a charged one always at the ready; there  are many reasonably priced portable, stand-alone chargers for cell phones that are now available.Consider investing in one and keeping it and your phone charged in the case of an emergency. Or, have your car charger handy as you can always use that as a back-up.

7)  Get Grounded – And despite of your best cell phone charging efforts, doing so just doesn’t cut it sometimes. In some emergency situations, cell phones won’t work. In other words, if you’re thinking of ditching your landline, think again. While trends have led many to forgo traditional technology for the sake of wireless and mobile phones, a blackout where there’s no access to wireless service reminds us that the old-fashioned home phone line is useful after all. In addition, calling 911 with a cell phone might make it difficult for emergency responders to locate you. In emergency situations, your landline is your friend. Have one available if you can.

8)  Bundle Up – A sleeping bag or warm blanket for each member of the household will come in handy in the event of a power outage or family emergency. Have these available as part of your Emergency Preparedness kit.

9)   A List of Who’s Who – Scrambling in the dark for phone numbers and contact information is no fun, particularly when small kids are in the mix and possibly panicking. Make sure to have an emergency contact list of all of the people that you may need to get in touch with in the event of an emergency. These include family members, child care providers, school contacts, neighbours and more. Have this information compiled in the light of day before anything happens so that when you do need to contact people, you won’t be in the dark – literally – trying to find the numbers.

10) Road Trip!: Have a relocation plan. Have an alternate location to go to in the event that you cannot be without power, even for a short period of time (i.e. babies might need a bottle warmed and being without heat or air conditioning might present risks to the very young). Consider a local library or community centre or even a friend or family member’s home.

So as you can see, there are some simple things that families can do to assure that they’re prepared in the case of an emergency situation at home. The key is being prepared before the emergency happens.

How many of these items do you have prepared? Did I miss any? Leave me your thoughts in the comments below!

VIDEO: Emergency Preparedness Tips From Multiple Mayhem Mamma on The Global Morning Show

Image courtesy of http://www.colehardware.com

The post An Emergency Preparedness Checklist – Top 10 Tips For Families appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

To hyphenate or not to hyphenate: that is the question.

These days, it’s one that most parents think about to some degree, given the growing number of women who choose to keep their maiden names after marriage. Certainly one can understand this desire; after all, there are a myriad of reasons as to why a woman would want to hold on to her birth name. Career success under this name, a connection to her family and ancestry and something as simple as the sound and flow of her name are reasons enough.

Because of this, there has been a more frequent discussion of the decision to give children of these marriages double-barreled names. It’s no surprise that a woman who has carried and given birth to her child would want him or her to carry at least some of her family name. On the other hand, there are many who feel that the decision to hyphenate a name is one that is fraught with trouble. The issues that they cite include a lack of unity within the family (the mother inevitably has a different name than the child, even if part of her name is the same) as well as what to do about future generations. After all – what happens when two children with hyphenated names grow up and marry each other? Do their children end up with four last names, or has what may have been perceived to be the inevitable occur: that one family name is chosen?

Full disclosure: I have a hyphenated name, but it’s not the result of marriage – at least not mine. My last name is my father’s last name, whose own father added a second name to his existing one (that’s another story in and of itself). I kept my full hypenated name after marriage, but my kids have my husband’s last name. Confusing or disjointed? Not to me – though some would disagree.

So what is the solution to this important question? Is it best to give your kids a double-barreled name, or choose one or the other?

Are hyphenated last names for kids a good idea or not?

Leave me your thoughts in the comments below. Can’t wait to hear from you!

VIDEO: Are hyphenated names for kids a good idea or not?

Image courtesy of www.thegazette.com

The post Monday Musings – Are Hyphenated Last Names For Kids A Good Idea? appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

There’s no way around it, celebrity culture is everywhere. It’s no surprise, then, that our kids are affected by the latest actions of some of their favourite stars. This would be fine if the object of our kids’ affection was one that we thought was a positive role model. The reality is, though, that many of our children’s idols are less-than-stellar examples of how one should behave. From Justin Bieber to Miley Cyrus, our kids are looking up to these celebrities while they themselves travel through both the ups and downs of growing up. Sometimes the behaviour displayed by their role models is exemplary. Other times – not so much. How then, do we make sure that our kids remember the values that we have taught them in the face of less-than-perfect celebrity conduct?

I was recently asked to return to the CBC Radio Fresh Air program to provide my perspective on this topic. The full interview can be found here:

CBC Radio Fresh Air Interview: Kids and the Culture of Celebrity

I’ve also put together some of the general questions asked, as well as my perspective, below.

1. What kinds of celebrities are we talking about?

Lindsay Lohan the obvious one, but also others that have been surprising: Miley Cyrus (Hanna Montana), Justin Bieber, Britney Spears – the problem is that kids have grown up with many of these child stars and have seen them evolve into adults with questionable behaviour. Now, the same fans are following and emulating them – not a good thing.

2. Celebrity culture is nothing new—as a parent, why should I care?

As a parent, how can we NOT care? Celebrity culture and their lifestyles are everywhere, particularly in this digital age. Media and digital technology make it so much easier for kids to access information anywhere, anytime – often without their parent’s knowledge. For this reason alone, we as parents need to be on top of what’s going on in the celebrity world (not only teen celebs) and countering it with our own values and lessons.

3. But just how much influence can celebrities have on young people?

So much more than any of us would imagine. Like us, our kids are victims of our celebrity culture, the cult of celebrity and the fact that we put stars on a pedestal, even if they don’t have any particular talent. We as a society have become increasingly more obsessed with celebrity culture and our kids have followed suit. It’s evident by the fact that the lines between true “news” and celebrity gossip have been blurred, and we see that traditional and well-respected news outlets often feature celebrity news on their front pages. Let’s also not forget that the digital age in which we live provides a 24/7 stream of celebrity gossip, to which our kids are regularly exposed.

4. What kind of conversation should you have with your children about your concerns?

I think it’s important for parents to instill their values into their kids at a young age and to keep going over them as the kids grow up and are exposed to the media. At the end of the day, we as parents should be the ones that our kids look up to and we should be teaching them right from wrong.

A discussion about the celebrity lifestyle and how these stars do not live the way most of the world does is in order as kids often don’t realize that celebrities are NOT like you and me, despite what they would like to convey to the contrary.

5. How do you deal with the peer pressure your kids might feel?

Again – it comes back to values and our kids having a strong sense of self worth and familial connection. If we’ve done our jobs in showing our kids right from wrong, teaching them our values, etc., they may make the better choices in not only who they emulate but their choice of friends as well.

6. What role should OTHER parents play?

I’ve always been of the mindset that we try to surround ourselves with those who are like-minded. We’d ideally like to have our kids do the same but that isn’t always the case. Getting to know the parents of your child’s friends is the first course of action in getting our kids on the right track. While we can’t completely control what our kids are doing especially when they get into their teens, we can do our part to investigate the types of people our kids are hanging out with. As parents, we also have the responsibility to get to know the parents of our kids’ friends. Someone once said that “it takes a village” to raise a child. Community support is important. This adage is no truer than it is today.

7. Is it realistic to think that you can keep your kids “celebrity-free”?

No, I don’t think it’s realistic. As a matter of fact, I think it’s practically impossible to do this. That’s why it’s so important to have an open dialogue about what’s going on in a child’s life, about what they’re doing in school, who they’re hanging out with, and who they emulate. Keep the lines of conversation open with your kids so that they feel that they can speak to you about what’s going on in their minds and about who they’re looking up to. And on the same note, keep up with what they’re doing on Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, etc. because it’s often the technology that is providing our kids with the updates on their favourite stars.

7.  What’s the bottom line on dealing with the cult of celebrity?

Let’s just accept that it’s here to stay and that we as parents have to be one step ahead of what our kids are doing and who they’re following. Keeping the lines of communication open, keeping up with who and what’s hot in the world of our kids and countering the negative stereotypes and messages from celebrities with our own values is the way to do it.

How do you feel about celebrity culture and its effect that it has on our children? What can we as parents do to assure that our kids continue to hold the positive values that we’ve instilled in them in the face of prevalent celebrity culture? Leave me your thoughts in the comments section below.

Image courtesy of http://www.fuse.tv

The post CBC RADIO INTERVIEW: Kids and the Cult of Celebrity appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

We can’t live without it.

Technology is here to stay.

We love our iPads, iPhones, Android and other tablet devices. Texting is part of our everyday lives. We crave the Internet and feel disconnected whenever we’re away from the comfort of our virtual world. It’s clear that technology is here to stay and digital technology specifically is part and parcel of most of our lives, in one way or another.

This is particularly the case in the lives of our children. Kids today are so comfortable and so entrenched in the digital world that it’s hard for them to imagine a life without the technology that they’ve come to know and love. Between video and online games for younger kids to texting, YouTube, Twitter and Facebook for older kids (often to the chagrin of their parents), there’s no way around it.

Tech is where it’s at. Imagine a world without Google. Mention this concept to a tween or teen and watch their eyes bug out in horror. Try telling your six-year-old that they’re cut off from using your iPad and you may experience a meltdown of monumental proportions.

The fact is that technology has permeated our kids lives in such a way that the thought of living without it is almost impossible to fathom.

But to what end?

As much as we love our gadgets and the Internet, one has to question the effect that both have had on our kids. While there’s no disputing the fact that digital technology has advanced our culture in so many ways, one has to wonder about its negative effects as well. Our kids accept technology as part of life, but as with everything, there are good and bad aspects to be considered.

For the many positive stories that exist about how technology has affected the lives of our kids, there are, unfortunately, an equal amount of stories about the dark side of the technological age. Our kids are being affected; it’s how they’re being affected that we need to consider.

So my question today is this: Has technology affected our kids for better or for worse? Leave me your thoughts in the comments section below!

Image courtesy of http://urbantommy.com

The post Monday Musings – Has Technology Affected Our Kids For Better or For Worse? appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.

Being a huge fan of Lifehacker, I was thrilled to have one of my more popular posts featured on the site. Meltdown in Aisle Five – Top 6 Tips For Keeping Your Kids Calm at the Supermarket – ran on Lifehacker recently under the site’s Parenting section. Here’s the link:

How to Get Your Kids Through the Grocery Store, Meltdown Free

The post Multiple Mayhem Mamma on Lifehacker appeared first on Multiple Mayhem Mamma.