Mummy Whisperer Blog

A ray of hope for all those excuses for being unhealthy, unfit and over-weight

MummyWhisperer — Tue, 21 May 2013 15:36:33 +0000

Muffin Top

Yesterday I asked what I thought was a pretty innocuous question on facebook and twitter “ I’d love all the reasons / excuses why you ended up unhealthy, unfit and overweight?”.

I was just looking to finish a list for my book, and expecting a couple of reasons. I must have had 100 answers by the end of the day!

I was so inspired by the number of answers that I decided to change what we talked about on Radio Verulam’s drive time show with Danny Smith and discuss this instead.

Listen here for the re-run (5.40-6pm on monday)

http://listenagain.radioverulam.com/station/archives/13

Whilst there were the typical ones:

Timing – basically having too much on and being unable to focus on one more thing

Lethargy and lack of prioritising- not being able to get motivated and never putting themselves first

Circumstances – Financial problems, and lack of support at home or with childcare

There were also a HUGE number of mums with illnesses, diseases, injuries, disabilities, mental health issues, stress, exhaustion etc.

Actually this makes sense.

Giving birth is tough on the body. It’s also tough on the stress levels and mental health. So it makes sense that actually there might be more mums struggling with these sorts of challenges.

Timing

I totally agree with this. There is no point adding another stressor to life by feeling guilty when you can’t prioritise getting healthy and fit at the same time as already having an overloaded life. It would actually be ‘unhealthy’ to add more to your plate.

As long as you know you won’t leave it too long; i.e. no longer than a year or two, I think this is a perfectly reasonable ‘excuse’.

Also it doesn’t have to be so black and white. Rather than aiming for some image of amazing ‘health’, why not try a couple of things gradually added over a 3 month period?

I would suggest:

1) Drinking more water and being thoughtful about how many cups of coffee you drink

2) Going for a 15-30 minute walk once or twice a week

3) Eating 5 fruit and veg a day

4) Stretch for 5 mins a couple of times per week

I would like to lose half a stone at the moment. My body is focussed on getting healthier. I look MUCH healthier, but the weight loss as you can see from my vlogs is going at the amazingly slow pace of 1lb per month argh! Guess it knows best ;o)

Lethargy and Prioritising

We get tired. We put the family first. We get more tired. It’s a vicious circle.

It does seem to get easier when the kids are all at school – you can tell the school mums who’s kids are all school age and who still has little ones by the muffin tops!

Eventually it’s time to break the circle, and luckily I have loads of tips on how to get your head and heart up for losing weight. It’s an easy mental exercise to link all the things and people you do love to getting healthier, fitter and stronger.

Remember the reason for doing this is not like it was at school; it’s not about being good at sport and winning. It’s about having some fun, and feeling better in ourselves so that we can enjoy life more.

If you don’t want to use my exercises to sort your motivation out, then hows about trying one of the hypnotherapy apps available for phones (I like Andrew Johnson’s because of the scottish accent!). Or EFT (tapping on the meridian points while discussing a problem) can be very helpful in breaking down barriers to weight loss.

Circumstances

I was surprised that not as many people as I might have expected blamed finances on not being able to afford healthy food. But it is definitely a problem for example I saw an organic apple was 50p the other day. So in a family of 4 it would cost £2 per day and £730 per year – that is ridiculous!

Luckily there are all sorts of blogs appearing on a daily basis with hints and tips for feeding a family on a budget (feel free to add yours in the comments). There are also food banks and options appearing in many cities where you can buy a bowl fool of fruit or veg at massively subsidised prices. For anyone struggling to buy food I would ask you to put aside any guilt / pride you might have and take all the options available to you.

Luckily walking is free (although if you have an injury you might want a pair of trainers). Aim for 10,000 steps per day (check out my Fibromyalgia posts for the supplement lists that helped me to manage to walk every day).

Playing with the kids is also free – mine will play tag every day if I offer.

If you have no child care, then it might be that you need to explain to your kids that you are going to exercise for 30 minutes a couple of times a week and they either join you or play on their own for a bit. You can always steal the kids xBox or Wii and do an exercise game!

Illness/Disease/Injury/Disability/Stress/Exhaustion

When the body is stressed it releases sugar into the body – not helpful for weight loss. It also shuts down all non-neccessary functions e.g. digestion and focusses on what it needs for ‘fight or flight’. If this goes on for too long, then it can definitely make healthy weight loss more difficult.

So I don’t want to add extra stress by making you feel guilty heh!

But I also don’t want you to stay a ‘victim’ of the problem for the rest of your life. I totally understand how difficult it can be – I whined about having PCOS for 10yrs before losing the weight, and have certainly been upset about the chronic pain from Fibromyalgia.

So let’s look at it this way:

It may be more difficult.

It may mean working our way around limitations and challenges.

But if we don’t do it, things will only get worse.

So it’s worth the effort?

Loads can be done purely with nutrition and hydration if you are physically challenged. You can definitely get to a healthier weight purely using them.

It might be also be worth focussing on the problems causing the exhaustion and stress first, and putting in things to reduce them first.

There are also professionals who can help you with tips on supplements and exercise e.g. health food shops, nutritionists, naturopaths, physiotherapists etc. This is especially important if you have an illness or medications which actually affect your weight and hunger levels. But it’s always important to check with your doctor, especially if you are already on medication. For instance I take 5-htp for my sleep, but it can’t be mixed with certain anti-depressants, and things like epilepsy meds are extremely vulnerable to supplements.

Always listen to your intuition as well. For instance, my body is NOT the kind that enjoys fasting, in fact ‘boom and bust’ is a bad habit of people with Fibromyalgia. However one of my best friends felt at her fittest when doing a diet that meant eating less for a couple of days per week. There is also the concept that come of us are more suited to certain foods, and I think that there maybe something in that: my husband is definitely better with more protein for instance. Never ignore that small voice inside, but question it if it is suggesting something extreme, fadish or ‘quick fix’.

A note:

I am not a nutritionist. I’m not a personal trainer. I’m just someone who has struggled with health, fitness and weight for years, and happened to learn the ‘secrets’.

My aim is to help the mums who are ‘under average’ healthy to improve their health; not to make them the healthiest in the world.

Someone rightly mentioned that there are many versions of what is considered ‘healthy’. My version of what is ‘healthy’ is a well balanced meal, including all food types. I’m a fan of moderation and balance. There are MUCH ‘healthier’ options out there. I just don’t think that they are practical for everyone. But I’m hoping that some people will learn the basics from me and then go on to learn even more. Meanwhile the rest of us will be much healthier than the average person on the street, with enough energy and vigour to enjoy being mums.

We have all used excuses/reasons to avoid getting healthier and fitter (apart from a few!) – but we don’t have to do it forever!

Can a Samsung SSD be installed by a 7 year old boy?

MummyWhisperer — Thu, 16 May 2013 10:00:17 +0000

New Cousin!

The people at Samsung asked me if I would like to install an SSD (Solid State Hard Drive) into my MacBook Pro to show how easy it is. With my schedule being tight I asked Curly Headed Boy if he fancied it instead (as the Big Hairy Northern One was jumping up and down in excitement about an SSD – apparently they are faster and he’d been looking to get one).

Of course CHB was right up for it, so I’m going to pass over my blog to Curly Headed Boy and his ‘new’ cousin Jonny or ‘His Trusty Side Kick’.

As an aside before you watch the VERY funny video (even if you care nothing for computers), don’t you think it is lovely how ‘the trusty side kick’ has been accepted by CHB and Little Dimples (he’s a ‘new’ cousin despite being 23 as one of my brother’s has just got married). Jon arrived on friday, and was launched upon by two very excited children immediately and they didn’t let go until monday morning (they are currently in mourning!).

For any geeks in you there is also a video of the difference in boot time with and without the SSD (ooooh!).

So over to the boys:

*************************************

Samsung SSD instructions

When Samsung offered to provide one of their top of the line SSD drives for us to review the offer was very tempting. Claims of faster boot-up times, file searches, app starts-ups, less downtime and lower power usage. It all looked good.

But in a MacBook Pro?

After some reading and discussion, the decision was yes. Having finished the reading the process to replace a hard drive in a MacBook Pro wasn’t complicated. But could a 7 year old open a MacBook Pro, remove the old Hard Disk Drive (HDD) and put in a new Solid State Drive (SSD)? That was the challenge I put to curly headed boy. I may have mentioned he risked Christmas if it went wrong (as you will see!).

The only tools required to do the job are a screwdriver and a torx driver. Oh and a 7yr old prepared to risk Christmas!

The steps involved are
1.    Format SSD to Mac OS
2.    Clone the original HDD
3.    Remove the old HDD
4.    Install the new SSD

Step 1. Format SSD to Mac OS

The new drive was connected to the MacBook Pro using a USB/SATA cable. After a minute the new drive showed up but it was not recognized and needed formatting. Open up disk utility and erase the drive reformatting to Mac OS. This took a few minutes.

Step 2. Clone the original HDD

The cloning was completed using Carbon Copy Cloner (http://www.bombich.com) and was a simple process. Download the software, select the source, select the destination and press go. Copy time is about 1GB a minute, so the cloning process can be lengthy if the original drive is quite full. This cloning went without a hitch again using the USB/SATA cable.

Steps 3. & 4. Install

Was a case of handing the drive over to curly headed boy. In his own style he then proceeded to follow the instructions.

The whole process from start to finish took about 3 hours as the donor hard drive was not that full and the majority of the time was the cloning. At the end of the video the new machine is booted and to the relief of everyone worked fine first time.

(There was a slight glitch as the instructions were for a PC and we didn’t have a torx driver).

Difference

The claims will only be realized over time, but initial impressions are very positive. The first claim of faster bootup can be tested easily here as we have two identical MacBook Pro’s (well they were until the SSD was installed)

As can be seen the SSD is 5 seconds quicker which is a great start for the new SSD. The biggest change is in the start time for things like email etc, which are now pretty immediate.

I’m expecting it to be more resilient, especially with the hard wear that the lap tops get, and something that is very hard disk intensive e.g. video or image processing will be faster.

Curly headed boy is over the moon with his first installation and Christmas has been saved! (No, of course we wouldn’t have cancelled Christmas!).

*Disclosure – we were given a Samsung SSD worth around £400 for the review, but our opinions are our own.

My progress 6 months on from Diagnosis with Fibromyalgia: NEWS!

MummyWhisperer — Sat, 11 May 2013 09:41:36 +0000

Progress

I have NEWS – there have been big changes.

Initially it was all rather slow, frustrating and two steps forward and one step back. My last post was very up and down.

However, it looks like it all accumulates into one big sudden improvement, once you have ticked off a large enough percentage of the changes needed. (I’m not fooling myself btw, I know there is still lots of work to do).

Here are some of the improvements:

I HAVE WALKED the dog every day for a fortnight. This is amazing. I tried before to gradually increase my walking and failed. I can’t tell you what a difference it makes to be able to do it.

I am no longer in constant chronic pain. I have constant pain, but it’s not unbearable or depressing.

Happy dog

I don’t feel like an 80 year old any more when bending down to putting the washing in the machine or walk down the stairs.

My TMJ (jaw pain) is much reduced.

I seem to have moved on to just get 1 flare per month, rather than 2; which is much more manageable.

Neither of my arms hurt.

I can pick up Little Dimples – what a relief, it was so awful not to be able to carry her when she needed me.

I’ve had some sleep.

I’ve adapted to no longer being competent – heh, who cares if I’m unreliable, ditzy and dis-organised from now on?

I’m beyond fighting it, not identifying myself as the victim of the story of it, and now more in a place where it is a guide for a while until I get the changes really sorted in my life.

I have no doubt that I will have it totally managed in the next 6 months.

I have hope that it’s possible to be free of it.

What have I done?

Supplements

I was found to be very low on VITAMIN D, despite taking it in a multi-fit (I was 42, it should be 72). They put me on a big dose of Vit D3 (gell capsules are best). I now buy my own and take a pill if there is no sunshine on a day. I’m going to ask to get my levels checked. This reduced my pain DRAMATICALLY (along with a big dose of sunshine in Lanzarote in the February half-term).

Found 5-htp and magnesium (must take the malate version – it’s gentler on the stomach) to improve my sleep.

CBT from the NHS (cognitive Behavioural therapy) – I need to blog about this some more, it’s helped, but I wonder whether it is a little shallow and only helped because I have a therapy background and could do a lot of homework. It was very helpful though in highlighting for me what causes a flare (e.g. freezing cold in a motorhome in Brighton will do it, or visitors who don’t help out!).

I’ve also tried EFT (Emotional Freedom Technique) for the discomfort in my back (almost itches and hurts from the inside) from the Adrenals and reduced the pain from 8/10 to 2/10. I can start to learn EFT myself and use it at home, so it’s a great find. (If you are local, try the lovely Mel at TherapHealing for EFT)

I’ve turned the tide on my weight and am at last working back downwards, if VERY slowly (I had just tipped over into an unhealthy weight).

Come off the drugs – I CONFESS – I realised on the friday of the bank holiday that I had awful Edema, so bad that my legs were ripping. I knew there was no chance of a Dr’s appointment, so I stopped taking the Amiltriptyline. That is wrong. I know. But I was only on 10mg. I probably should have cut the pills in half instead. I had a couple of bad days with headaches and insomnia. But I’m glad now.

I’ve dropped sugar in my tea, I have the odd cake, but no more biscuits, and found a natural alternative to sugar for my tea. The horrible, hot burning pain in my hips is dramatically improved from this – if I make a mistake I know it immediately.

The MOST AMAZING change has come from taking Cherry Active concentrated sour cherry juice morning and evening. This is the reason that I can walk the dog.

Curly Headed Boy says I seem happier and look healthier than I did before I was ill.

Continuing with Previous Things:

Continuing with the Pilates – to strengthen my muscles means I don’t have to use as much of them, hence have less pain.

Still taking Omega 3, 6 & 9 (for brain fog), Optibac Probiotics (for IBS) and a good multi-vit.

Stopped taking Floradix – I feel I’m taking enough!

I’m going to a womans group monthly. We meditate, do something personal-developmenty, chat, drink tea and eat biscuits; it’s perfect! (If you fancy a supportive, fun, monthly group for women check out Actually Mummy’s review of our ‘Vision Boarding’ get-together),

Still meditating weekly, and a shamanism group monthly, which are great for support.

Warm showers every morning. Cold if the pain is burning (brrrr, but it works). Hot flannel for the muscles in my face to relax and if I’m tired, plus a big splash of cold water.

Hot bath with a couple of cup fulls of Epsom Salts and some aromatherapy oil once a week for at least 20 mins.

Aloe Vera Gell for the ‘hip burn’ (it itches and burns from the inside).

My Work

6 Steps To A Sparkling You

I have a PUBLISHING DEAL!!

This means that edition 2 of “Six Steps To A Sparkling You and Enjoying Being a Mum” will be out in September along with a NEW paperback version.

Plus the first edition of “Get Healthy, Fit and Strong without Diets and Bootcamps” with a paperback version straight away.

How exciting!

And book 3 “Who On Earth Am I?” is brewing nicely – look out for new posts along those lines soon.

I’ve also decided that I will definitely not return to teaching the Demartini Method, when I’m healthier, but instead go back to what I did 13yrs ago doing a mixture of healing and coaching. It’s a lot easier to fit into life with 2 children, and although less lucrative, it’s less tough on me as well.

This is a HUGE decision as I worked blinking hard, spent many years and a lot of money to get my senior certification, but it’s the right one. I’ll still use all the philosophies with my coaching.

If you have Fibromyalgia check out my page about my Fibro journey and all the things I have changed or tried. I’d love to know if there is anything you have tried that has worked?

If you have a relative or friend with Fibromyalgia, please let them know about my page as it’s often very difficult for people to get information about it.

Can a book festival really be fun? Does it encourage kids to read?

MummyWhisperer — Thu, 09 May 2013 15:21:35 +0000

What a Beast!

Is a book festival fun?

I was worried.

My kids are used to going to festivals. So turning up at a ‘book festival’ were they going to be severely disappointed?

Our first stop was to Beast Quest. Very quickly my worries were calmed. A crazy magician guy introduced the concept (I had no idea what it was all about), read a bit (very funny!), and then they played a beast quest version of bingo (chaos!). Finally they all designed a new monster with Justin Bieber hair and every possible other ‘evil’ quality available.

Here is the monster that they created:

Curly Headed Boy is now very into the books and also the new ones ‘Sea Quest’ as the hero has the same name as him.

Authors we saw:

Helen Dennis – Curly Headed Boy adored her and we have therefore got a pile of her ‘Secret Breakers’ books. Clearly she knows how to relate to kids in real life as well as in her books.

Jeff Norton – is now CHB’s new hero because having turned up early to the talk he got to talk to him lots beforehand. His Metawars books really appealed to CHB’s very philosophical ‘what if’ nature as well e.g. What if we could upload ourselves into computers? It covers some really modern problems/concepts and shows why we need new books sometimes, despite the old classics still being wonderful.

Jackie Morris – wasn’t very engaging for the kids to be honest. Perhaps a little too ‘into her art’ and out of touch with the kids. But her artwork and books are beautiful, especially for a child like Curly Headed Boy who is quite into nature or spirituality.

Missed:

Jonathon Meres – ‘World of Norm’ – who wrote the fab guest post on my blog.

David Melling ‘Hugable Douglas’ – who wrote the cutest guest post on my friend’s blog and therefore we had to by his book which is a firm favourite.

Lauren Child (Charlie and Lola) and Cressida Cowell (How to train your dragon) – one mum felt that it was really only useful for grown ups, but a mum with older children loved this talk, which was the big seller for the day.

Does it encourage reading?

I’m surprised. It’s a resounding YES. Even in Little Dimples (3yo).

Curly Headed Boy has been tackling much thicker books all on his own, even Meta Wars, which to be honest I think is aimed at much older kids (he is 7). He has definitely suddenly moved onto books that are centimetres thick rather than just 20 pages.

It cost us a fortune!

Curly Headed boy insisted on buying any books related to the authors he had met. Plus I LOVE books, and there were some gorgeous ones there that I’d never noticed on our more recent trips to book shops.

We definitely have years worth of books – so I see it as an investment *cough*

Here are my finds:

East of the sun

WildChild

Jackie Morris’s ‘East of the Sun, West of the Moon’ – it’s taking some time to get CHB to read this, but as it has a distinct hint towards the natural world or magical fantasy ideas, I know he will love it. He just needs to get over the fact that he didn’t bond with Jackie herself.

Jeanne Willis and Lorna Freytag ‘Wild Child’ – you can see from the picture how gorgeous this book is! It is truly gorgeous, can’t recommend it enough.

Lauren Child ‘I will not go to sleep’ – Little Dimples (3) adores this, and I will definitely be buying more. Having an older brother and the relationship being similar means that she totally relates to it. CHB loves it too – but don’t tell anyone!

Only down points

Cheeky Butterfly

Facepainting – if you are going to have it with hundreds of kids, have more than ONE slow person, or only offer small quick options. A great alternative is to have a face painting station where the kids and parents can do it themselves. I queued with an INCREDIBLY patient Little Dimples (3yo) for must have been 45 minutes for the blinking face painting! Hence I missed Helen Norris totally, which was a shame as Jeff Norton was on when Little Dimples needed a nap, so I missed him too.

More signs needed – parents with children do get easily confused and easily stressed. I didn’t actually find the walled garden until I left because I followed a sign that said ‘EXIT’ – it actually meant exit from the walled garden. Apparently I missed great cakes and tea in there.

There was a lull point, which I think was arranged to coincide with lunch and give people a chance to wander around. But actually for people who had arrived later it meant that they got a bit bored.

The toilets ran out of tissue – the normal issue with festival toilets, but daft for just a one day event.

There weren’t enough toilets – very difficult for an event with lots of young children hopping round, desperate for a pee.

Directions at Luton hoo hotel entrance would have been great to send us further down the road.

Would I go again?

YES!

Would I pay for tickets myself (I went on press tickets) – Yes!

How to start up your own parent blog and why you want to!

MummyWhisperer — Wed, 01 May 2013 08:55:56 +0000

I went to chat with the deliciously ditzy Sophie Sulehria on the last bank holiday at BBC3 Counties Radio about how I got into blogging.

Have a listen to her, I really hope that BBC3CR give her a permanent slot soon, as she has a great warm air about her that just makes you smile. Plus at the moment their schedule is ALL MEN (tut tut BBC3CR!!):

I am REALLY passionate about blogging, because it can be:

1) Cathartic

2) A great support community

3) Fab diary of your children’s younger years

4) A way to learn new skills

5) Gets you to read interesting, educational and funny blogs

6) Possibly even a way to earn money or get treats for the family

I think that it can be magic for people, as long as they don’t go into it with pre-concieved ideas of what they are going to get from it. You don’t have to do it the way I have, where it has taken over my life, it can just be a once a week/month quick post. Just start writing about whatever is going on with you and then change as your interests change.

Remember blogs posts are:

1) Short and pithy.

2) Pictures are great.

3) Have lots of white space.

4) Always have a WHITE background, not black with white writing.

5) You don’t have to be a writer or have any qualifications to do it

I didn’t realise I could write, or would enjoy it. There are hints right from my child hood that it is ‘what I’m meant to be doing’, but it took a while for me to notice – doh! I’ve been a geek, and a tree-hugger, but now due to my blog I’m an ‘author‘ too. Loads of people I’ve met have found a new career through blogging, not necessarily to become a writer, but maybe a new interest or a career in PR, social media or even radio!

It’s free to start, just go to blogger or wordpress.com (my fave). Pick a name, but first make sure no one else has got the same blog name (i.e. google for the ” blog”). Your blog can be totally honest, partially (my choice) or completely anonymous if you prefer.

There can be some downsides of course!

1) It is highly addictive (unplug frequently)

2) The technical/social media stuff can be overwhelming (just take it one step at a time)

3) Blogging can be competitive and bitchy (ignore, ignore, ignore!)

4) One sign of success is getting trolls (doesn’t happen until you are really successful normally).

St Albans is the blogging capital of the UK and there are loads of bloggers in Herts, Beds and Bucks, so if you are local you will find lots of people to help you out – just come and make contact with us on twitter and start reading our blogs and commenting and we will reciprocate. It’s like normal relationship, you don’t become best friends straight away, but you do get closer as time goes by; I have some fab friends online now a days, many of whom I have met face to face (I’ve been blogging for 4 years).

Another place to find blogs is on awards list. As it would happen I’ve been short listed for a Brilliance in blogging award and could do with a vote, meanwhile you can check out the other fab blogs (but remember it’s me you are voting for!!!).

If you are a new blog, or are in Herts, Beds and Bucks and what to meet fellow bloggers, remember to add a comment below.

Got any questions about starting a blog? I’m happy to help.

I’ve been shortlisted in the Brilliance in Blogging Awards – Please vote for me!

MummyWhisperer — Sat, 27 Apr 2013 14:06:54 +0000

Thank you so much to who ever nominated me in the BiBs2013, I’ve been shortlisted in the video category!

I was a little surprised about this, as it was my plan to really start getting into videos this year, and I didn’t feel I had embraced it properly yet.

But it’s given me a boost to do lots more, thank you!

And if there is any chance that you have a couple of seconds to vote for me, I’d be really chuffed! (Check out the other blogs if you like and then click on the bit that says ‘vote in the 2013 BiBs’ to actually vote).

What have I done?

Here is my YouTube Channel, it’s got lots of bits and pieces on it.

I had a think about what videos I have done:

My kids are the stars of the show of course!:

My most popular is the gorgeous David Tennant!

Most recently there have been my Weight Loss Diary Vlogs:

I even embraced a Google Hangout and have several more planned for this year to get everyone healthy, fit and strong.

There have been lots of radio interviews in my Lifestyle correspondent role for Radio Verulam:

And a few BBC3 Counties Radio Interviews too:

I’ve even used a video to sell my book:

So I suppose I have done some video blogs. But so have the others – I’m up against some tough and great competition.

So if you would like to see more of my face and the fact that I seem to have a much more noticeable lisp than I thought, then:

VOTE FOR ME!!!

Get me into the finals, I would be really chuffed!

Chatting with Iain Lee on BBC3C Radio about Mum’s ages – Is it selfish to be older

MummyWhisperer — Fri, 26 Apr 2013 10:06:56 +0000

The other day I was on BBC3 Counties Radio chatting to Iain Lee about wether you are ever to old to be a Mum.

Check us out here:

I’m and ‘older mum’

Living in Hertfordshire means that there are lots of ‘older mums’. Whereas when I fell miraculously pregnant with Curly Headed Boy at 36 I was considered ‘geriatric’ in Peterborough (I wasn’t meant to be able to have kids).

Falling again at 40 with Little Dimples, the difference in my body has been REALLY noticeable. Plus it’s been very tricky since getting Fibromyalgia.

But I’ve often thought I would have been a great ‘young mum’, awful 20′s-early 30′s Mum, and am glad that it happened to be later.

What did everyone else say?

When I asked on twitter and facebook, I was really surprised that the age limit people were talking about was 40. I was expecting them to be saying late 40′s as the upper limit.

Being the child of older parents

My mum was 43 when she had me (my brothers are 20yrs older than me). That’s not a problem in itself, apart from the fact that I was a ‘young carer’ for both my parents from around 5 years old.

Some responsibility and learning about empathy and taking care of people is good. The mistake they made was relying on me totally for things and not getting proper qualified help at times.

My Dad died when I was 20. I didn’t have an adult relationship with him.

My Mum died when I was pregnant with Curly Headed Boy.

They smoked, drank a lot, didn’t keep fit or eat healthily.

They didn’t make sure that someone else was lined up to ‘watch over me’.

There is no one on the worst days or the best days to call. There is no one who cares enough to listen to the boring, repetitive minutae of my life.

I’ve found the lovely Nanny Bets in Tesco’s who is like an adoptive grandparent for the kids (and gives me lovely hugs), and one of my brothers makes a big effort with his new wife.

Most of the time it’s OK. Sometimes it isn’t.

So yes, I do think that it is selfish to have children when you are older, if you don’t try your hardest to be healthy.

Of course, this is why I am ‘ME’. It’s why I’m so passionate about keeping yourself healthy. It’s why I’m so good at my ‘job’ as I learned so young. I wouldn’t change ‘me’, so why would I change this?

What do you think? Do you worry about it?

Or do you think that a woman has the right to have a child whatever age she is?

Even push the boundaries of science and have them when her body has gone into the menopause and she is in her 50′s?

Weight Loss Diary: Week 7: How Life Gets In The Way Of The Best Laid Plans

MummyWhisperer — Thu, 25 Apr 2013 09:49:41 +0000

Those of you who can add up can probably see that there was a Week 1, Week2, Hangout in week3, and then week 4, 5 and 6 are missing!

Yep, life totally got in the way!

Check out my video and my small amount of progress weight wise, but lots health wise:

I mention in there the progress I have made on my pain levels with Fibromyalgia by cutting out sugar and the research I did into sugar, sweeteners and the natural alternatives. I was only having 3 teaspoonfuls of sugar a day in a cup of tea, no biscuits, but maybe some chocolate and cake. The sugar is all gone, and the chocolate is now 1 piece of dark chocolate a day, and the cake just an unusual treat. I can actually feel the difference if I have a day when I eat too much sugar, which is great because it is proving how much it affects my body. I really recommend you think about it.

Thank you!

By the way a BIG THANK YOU to whoever nominated me in the Brilliance in Blogging awards 2013 in the video section – I was a bit surprised, but I’m assuming it is because of the stuff I’ve been doing about weight, unless it is because of David Tennant? I would love some votes, as to be a finalist would be fantastic!

More help

If you are a little further along with your weight loss journey, remember that there are more tips here:

On weight loss

On Nutrition

And Exercise.

Or if you realise that you aren’t quite ready because you are too tired and too stressed, then check out my book ‘6 Steps To a Sparkling You And Enjoying Being a Mum‘.

Any questions, pop them in the comments.

Join Me Next Time Or Get More Direct Help!

I’m going to do a two more of Google+ hangouts about getting Healthy, Fit and Strong:

My next will be on understanding ourselves, because that is important in order to link our goals to what is important to ourselves.

Then I will do a hangout on the linking exercise to get us (AND ME!!!) motivated!

Fancy joining me? You can either join in, or watch live and chat us questions, or watch afterwards.

Join my FB page and contact me in my FB group. You will need a Google account too (here is my profile and page). I need to know your current weight, goal, and what methods you are using at the moment if you have already started.

Don’t worry I will record the hangouts and put them on my Youtube page and post them here on my blog.

Sugar and Sweeteners are they bad for you? What’s the alternative?

MummyWhisperer — Tue, 23 Apr 2013 08:08:26 +0000

This week’s chat with the lovely Danny Smith on his drive time show over at Radio Verulam was about nutrition and a few things that people might not know about SUGAR and SWEETENERS.

The problem is they are HIDDEN in lots of things that we eat and people don’t know.

Plus there are BIG health problems attached to them.

But don’t worry, you know me, I’m not into extremes, so I do have some ideas for alternatives.

If you fancy listening to us, then it’s about 15 minutes including music. Otherwise, I’ve written it up below with some extra information I found afterwards:

Sweeteners?

Did you know that sweeteners are bad for you?

They are full of chemicals, that build up in your body and do it no good whatsoever. There are tonnes of people talking in much more technical terms about this on the internet, so I’m not going to go into lots of biology about it, but basically they are toxins that build up in your body.

They are ironically NOT good for long term balanced weight as the body gets confused by eating something sweet that then has no calories. Plus as you get more and more of these in the body, they will make weight loss more difficult as the body can’t work as well.

So DO NOT drink diet drinks. Never ever ever. Go for full sugar if you have to have a fizzy drink, or find something else or a different alcoholic drink that needs a different mixer. Water is of course a great alternative! I also talk about being careful of how much caffeine you drink later on in the day.

Watch out for low fat or low sugar foods. In fact ANYTHING that LOOKS HEALTHY is probably packed with sweeteners and therefore bad for you!

Watch out for SQUASH because it often has sneaky sweeteners in it. Instead look for a good fruit juice from concentrate (water it down if you like) or a squash with sugar.

So if you need sweetness I would actually advise sugar, just less of it so that it doesn’t affect your weight, insulin levels or health!

Sugar?

Problem is that sugar isn’t too good for you either.

Too much of it (like too much fat) affects the glyceamic index and insulin levels in the body that can aggravate or cause illnesses like Polycystic ovarian syndrome, IBS and Diabetes.

But most of all it is TERRIBLE for the immune system. Us mums already have the bio weapons of mass destruction bringing every bug known to mankind back from school, and waking us up at night. We don’t need something else that will literally inflame the insides of our bodies.

So if you need sugar use brown sugar, because that is marginally better for you than the white stuff and CUT out daily sugary treats, instead having a weekly one.

Now earlier on I said don’t drink diet drinks, so what about the others? Well, be warned, often the healthy ones are packed with sugar especially those ‘water with a hint of something’ drinks that make you feel so self-righteous!

Plus if like Danny you like a can of coke you are looking at about the equivalent of 10 teaspoonfuls of sugar, which is 40g of sugar. That is A LOT OF SUGAR. Added to that is the caffeine. So if you have any problems with your weight, sleep, emotional/mental health definitely don’t drink any after 4pm and consider finding something else that you like but which is a lot lower.

The NHS recommend the following: 70g for men and 50g for women depending on your height. That means that 1 can of coke leaves you with very little leeway to have ANYTHING else in the day. E.g. There could be another 4-5gs in one slice of bread, so if you have a sandwich you are done for the day and can’t add ketchup to your evening meal!

Remember that it is hidden in all sorts of things; always check the INGREDIENTS list. I was over at Nanny Bets house the other day, helping her look through her cupboards. The healthy cereal she had picked had added sugar. The porridge was the ground up easy to put in a microwave stuff with none of the benefits of real porridge.

If you check the labels, the NHS recommends that:

more than 15g of total sugars per 100g is high
5g of total sugars or less per 100g is low

Alternatives?

I am not saying give up sweet! Phew, you say!

If you have an immune system disease like me, then I would say that ALL sugar and ALL sweeteners have to go from your diet.

If you tend to be very up and down emotionally or are dealing with depression, then I would warn you to make sure that you always include something that is low in the Glyceamic Index when you have something that is high sugar or high fat, as it will only make things worse.

For the rest of you, it’s about cutting it down the sugar, cake and biscuits instead.

Here are some natural alternatives:

Honey – high GI, but natural and Manuka honey can be great for the immunity

Maple Syrup – comes from trees, rather than our traditional golden syrup, again high GI but natural

Stevia – is a natural sweetener, but I’m not keen because it doesn’t have ANY calories and I think that it will confuse the body

Xylitol – is the one I’m using at the moment for my 3 cups of tea a day.

There are definitely others: always worth a check at your local health food shop and by googling to see if anything new has arrived on the scene.

Quitting Sweetness Altogether?

You will find a LOT of stuff on the internet about how sugar, fructose, glucose, sucrose, carbohydrates and anything sweet, starchy or down right yummy is bad for you.

I totally DISAGREE! What would life be like without a little sweetness? Why on earth were bees created if not to bring a little pleasure into our lives?

Long term I’m convinced that those low carbohydrate diets are positively unhealthy and damage the body.

Check out this book called ‘I didn’t Quit Sugar‘, it gives some really good advice, lots of technical information and they are about to bring out a recipe book too.

So what do you think about sugars and sweeteners?

Have you ever tried to those low carb diets?

Have I given you enough of a kick to try cutting back on your sugar and adding a few other alternatives?

How to go on holidays with more than two children and not pay a fortune

MummyWhisperer — Fri, 29 Mar 2013 15:55:11 +0000

Omaha Beach

No one warns people when they have more than two children that suddenly there will be huge problems with holidays.

A couple of years ago we went to Cyrpus in one of those studio apart-hotels. We met a lovely family with 3 children. They could easily have fitted into the studio, but that was against the rules, so they had to rent two, live in one, and could only afford one week because of the extra cost.

I know, I know, some of you will be all like ‘well they decided to have 3,4 or 5 kids’. Yes, I know, but some people are really brave/good at the whole kids thing. Or they make mistakes. Whatever reason, they need holidays more than the rest of us less brave 1 or 2 children families!

I know that you can rent a villa, but that doesn’t really work for me as there is no entertainment and my kids want other kids to play with.

I remember trying to google for affordable holidays for families and getting totally mind boggled with all the options that didn’t really seem to make it easy for a family.

But I have a solution if you are looking for one ….

A holiday in a luxury mobile home with Siblu in France

These guys are the perfect solution and luckily I can speak from personal experience because they sent my family and I off to review them last year.

Ferries are much easier than planes for a large family to keep their eyes on everyone.

Plus you get all the ‘normal’ facilities like kids clubs, pools, beaches (some are right on the beach, for some there is a drive) and entertainment.

The only difference is that you aren’t in an actual hotel or apartment, but spread out a little more with your own little site and caravan.

You can go for an active holiday in Normandy with a short drive like we did, or drive a few hours further south for a hot holiday.

And they don’t charge you ridiculous amounts because you happen to have an extra child, in fact you just pay for the van which can house up to 6 or 8 people. (If you can afford it, go for one with a big terrace, I think it really helps with children).

A holiday for 2 weeks, including the ferry trip would have set us back LESS than Butlins or Center Parcs last year, and although it was cheap it wasn’t tacky and horrid at all; which was my big fear.

I think that they are a fabulous option for families in these recession hit times, and once tried they will realise that there is no reason to go back to the more expensive holidays they used to have.

Here are all my other posts about Siblu:

An adventure in Normandy: my official review of Domainne De Litteau

What would have happened if Germany had won WW2: a review of the american Omaha cemetery

Which is best going by Ferry or Plane? A review of the ferry trip to Siblu

Disclosure: The lovely Siblu people are sending me off to Britmums this year, which I am extremely grateful for. So they did ask that I write a couple of posts about them in return. Seems only fair, and luckily not difficult to do as we had such a lovely time there.