mwakenya

traffic rules and penalties in 2012

Tue, 13 Nov 2012 13:30:00 +0000

Here is a summary of the drastic new traffic rules caused by the Amendment ofsection 12 of Cap 403 of the lawsof Kenya. The president signed the amendments yesterday meaning they are in operation from today and we could all be victims.

A). Number plates: When you sell your vehicle, you shouldsurrender the number plates totheregistrar of motor vehicles and when you fail to renew the insurance, remember to surrender the number plates tothe registrar otherwise you risk being arrested and fined

B). Overlapping, obstruction, driving on pavement or through a petrol station to avoid traffic-You risk a fine of Kshs 100,000-300,000 or One year in jailor BOTH

C). Over speeding – when you over speed- Yourisk a fine of Kshs10,000 or3 months imprisonment or both

D). Careless Driving: Penalty of Ksh500,000 or 10 yearsimprisonment or both

E). Careless driving causing death: Life Imprisonment.This is being treated like murder.

F). Driving under influence of alcohol: A fine of Ksh 500, 000 or ten years in jail or both.

G). PSV Operators - Should adhere to the uniforms and badges rules

H). Motor Cycle operators -ONE PASSENGER only and the passenger and ridermust be in reflective vestsandhelmets- otherwise you risk a fine of Kshs 10,000and in default 12 months imprisonment

Other changes as below:

• Road blocks are to be gazetted prior to being mounted by the police

• Driving licenses of speed limit violators shall be suspended for not less than 3

years if the person has exceeded speed limit by more than 10kph and if offence is repeated 3 or more times.

• Mandatory eye test every 3 years for licensed drivers. Andif you fail the test

then license is with drawn.

• All law enforcement officers (regular police andAPs) are now effectively mandated to deal with traffic issues with the abolition of the Traffic Department under the Kenya Police Service Act.

MOST IMPORTANT: LET US SHARE THIS INFORMATION WITH ALL OUR DRIVERS, COLLEAGUES, FAMILY &FRIENDS

What marketers and sales men could learn from Nairobi hawkers

Tue, 30 Oct 2012 08:45:00 +0000

Have you ever encountered those pesky fellows who stalk in town holding sim-cards or offering you loans…don’t they just irritate you? I have worked in sales and I tell it is very hard to get folks to even listen to you let alone purchase a product…however with time I have learned a few tricks here and there that have enabled me meet my targetsand surprisingly it is from hawkers…now I know you are asking how come?

Here is how

Make effects work for you

Have you ever bought a shirt in town that looked like an Armani for fifty bob but only to get home and find it shady…yep that a classic art of visual effects…some hawkers sell fruits with leavesspread all round so that you think that they are all fresh only to find thatthey are stale…...marketers or sales men are aloof of the effects they coulduse to woo customers…they take too much time to sell a thing

Small margin of profit

Marketers sell products making huge margins but reduced sales…reduced rate of sales also cost the company. This cost comes in the form of breakages, storage costs and obsolesce…

Invest in attention grabbing speech

It is said that a man’s attention span has reduced over the years…there are just so many distractions around and other more interesting things to see and do. So if you have to get some of my time might as well be enjoyable and insightful not loads of information packaged it long monologues I can’t directly relate to

Take advantage of the situations

Have you ever seen hawkers appear out of nowhere with umbrellas just when it starts to rain…have you seen how fast they sell them off…no that is what taking advantage of a situation is all about…situations and events can easily help you meet that sales target. Look for that one situation that

Convenience to customers

Hawkers sell where it is convenient…they sell vegetables when people are going home…some sales men do not quite get that you should be at the right place at the right time to finalize a sale otherwise you will not be able to complete it…for example car insurance sale persons should be close to car yards and showrooms because it is there that new car owners would look to get an insurance cover..

Market segmentation

Have you ever noticed that hawkers have different prices for different clients at any time…it may be an unfair practice but it sure helps make a quick sale to a broke client and compensate the less margin by a sale to a loaded client…sales person just have flat prices which may lock out some people

kenya's Finance bill 2012

Tue, 15 May 2012 11:30:00 +0000

Income Tax

1. Medical Benefit Beneficiaries

position in finance bill 2012

The Finance Act 2012 further elaborates on this provision by defining “beneficiaries” to include the employee’s spouse and not more than four children whose age shall not exceed twenty-one years.

Effective Date

9 June 2011

2. Withholding Tax on winnings from betting and gaming

position in finance bill 2012

The Finance Bill 2011 introduced withholding tax at a rate of 20% on winnings by residents from betting and gaming. the 2012 bill extended to include non-residents too

effective Date

Minister to advise on the effective date through the Kenya Gazette notice

3.Deemed Interest

position in finance bill 2012

the Finance Bill 2011 also introduced withholding tax at the rate of 15% on this deemed interest.

in the Income Tax Act had not been appropriately amended to make such deemed interest taxable. This has now been amended in the Finance Act 2012.

effective Date

9 June 2011

4.Self-assessment returns for employees

position in finance bill 2012

Employees whose only income comprises emoluments from employment on which tax has been deducted under PAYE, will not be required to file annual self-assessment returns.

The Finance Act 2012 elaborates on this amendment further by clarifying that this provision only applies to an employee who is employed by or renders services to one employer

effective Date

9 June 2011

5.Withholding tax on management or professional or training fees

position in finance bill 2012

The Finance Act 2012 has now repealed this amendment (2011 ammendment) with the rate being reverted back to the 5%.

effective Date

Effective immediately

6. Electronic TaxRegisters (ETR)

position in finance bill 2012

The Finance Act 2012 has introduced the requirement forGeneral Packet Radio Service (GPRS) enabled ETR machines

effective Date

2 May 2012

7.Installation of metering devices by excise licensees

position in finance bill 2012

The Finance Act 2012 has amended the Customs & Excise Act in regard to the requirement of installation of metering devices by an excise licensee. Previously , one had to comply with this requirement upon the expiry of six months from the date of publication in the gazette.

This has now been amended to permit upon application to the Commissioner, an extension of a further period not exceeding six months, upon expiry of the date

of publication in the gazette.

effective date

2 May 2012

some useful tips on how to cope with being stuck in nairobi's traffic jam

Thu, 10 May 2012 20:55:00 +0000

image source

• Avoid road rage and stress. If you are headed to work call and let someone know you are going to be late due to the traffic jam. Take a look out of your window and notice everyone else is stuck as well. No need to honk your horn, yell or scream. You won't get there any faster. Take in 5 deep breaths if you feel the road rage creeping in.

• Avoid Overlapping: This will cause even more traffic. Just be patient

• It could be worse: If the traffic jam is caused by an accident. Be glad you were not in involved in the accident. Be glad you are just delayed. It could be much worse

• Keep children entertained: Children get restless. Play some educational games to keep their minds active

• Make sure you all use the toilet before you get on the road. Please do not hold it in for too long and over time it could cause bladder infections, weak urinary tract muscles and weak bladder control. It can also lead to other kidney infections and cause impotence in men

• Listen to the radio: Turn on the radio when you drive, not only you can keep up with the traffic status; it can also help you relax and unwind.

• Drinks and snacks: Have some drinks or light snacks in the car, that way, it will kill off some boring time, while ensure you will not be dehydrated and hungry if the traffic jam become extensive. Just avoid anything messy. Good snacks are dried fruit,nuts, air popped popcorn, dry healthy cereals etc.

• Stretch: Most people don't think about the bodybelow theirbelt when driving slowly until they get of the car with a leg cramp and a sleeping foot.

When you're at a dead stop, and lift your right thigh off the seat. Move both legs wherever they will go withoutgetting stuck.

Most people hold tension intheir neck and back, so try to keep yoursrelaxed and stretch your neck from side to side when you’re safely stopped

• Do some brainwork: If you always have the radio blaring, you might never allow yourself time to think. If this is the case, change your drivingroutine and create a better thinking environment for yourself. You may even do some quality problem- solving. Run over upcoming projects in your mind and write down your ideas when you reach yourdestination.

• Relax & Destress: Place lemon, grapefruit or peppermint oil on a tissue and place this near the air vents in the vehicle. This can act as an uplifting scent keeping passengers anddriver alert, it keeps the air smelling fresh.

– Use the radio to play soothing music when in slow moving traffic .

– Sing along to your favourite song

– Try to practise calm and deep breathing to relax and avoid road rage situations.

you might want to read the new traffic rules

courtesy of AON health

What to consider before planting trees in your compound

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 13:05:00 +0000

These days it is not just environmentally smart but also prudent in modern day but before you plant a forest in your neighborhood you should first consider the following

Do you want to have a well?

It is important to consider the kind of trees you want to plant in case you want to have a well. This is because thereare some plants that sap water very fast and would thus dry up you well quickly this include trees such as eucalyptus

What are the structures of the roots?

There are two types of tree roots, fibrous roots and tap roots…why are this is importance? Fibrous roots grow widthwise and would thus destroy any structures and affect any plants within a certain radius over time. Case have been observed where some tress destroy buildings

The climatic conditions

Various areas have various climatic conditions. There are arid, semi-arid and wet climates. There humid and windy conditions as well at temperature considerations. Lack of knowledge could for example cause you to plant trees that work well in wet areas in arid areas,this would in effect increase the cost of taking care of the trees or else they would fail

Do leaves fall off?

Some trees shed their leaves and flowers periodically as seasons change and this could mean extra work in terms of collecting leaves. So in case you do not want to do all this work all the time then avoid such trees

Does the tree whisper or crackle?

In times of wind some trees make a whispering or crackling noise which you really can do nothing about. Keeping this in mind it is good to consider whether you can put up with this reality

How long does a tree take to mature?

Some trees especially hard woods take ages to grow into mature trees. Some may take as long as 25years to grow, so in case you are the impatient type please consider planting the faster growing varieties

Does it play host to caterpillars/ birds/wild bees

Some tress play host to caterpillars and wild bees as well as birds whose very presence could either be annoying or entertaining…it is good to ask around to find out what animals like to inhabit such trees for example acacia trees attract weaver birds which can be quite noisy at times

Does it flower or produce? How often?

Part of the beauty of trees is flowers and fruits. Not only to flowers bring beauty but could give a garden a sweet scent. Some fruits could also be eaten or sold for extra income. So in case any of these is of interest to you then plant such trees

Level of sedimentary rock

One of the reasons that plants fail is the fact that their growth might be stunted by sedimentary rocks beneath the surface. In case the sedimentary rock is near the surface then it is good to consider planting tree that do not have an elaborate tap root system

Have a lovely time planting trees

New NHIF premium payment & deductions

Mon, 23 Apr 2012 05:15:00 +0000

Below are the new NHIF premium rates categorized by various income brackets. the rates will be in application from May 2012

Gross Income (Ksh) Monthly Contribution (Ksh)

Less than 5,999 150.00

6,000 - 7,999 300.00

8,000 - 11,999 400.00

12,000 - 14,999 500.00

15,000 - 19,999 600.00

20,000 - 24,999 750.00

25,000 - 29,999 850.00

30,000 - 49,999 1,000.00

50,000 - 99,999 1,500.00

Over 100,000 2,000.00

Self Employed 500.00

Indigents (Voluntary) 300.00

New traffic rules-effective 23 march 2012

Tue, 17 Apr 2012 10:55:00 +0000

Please take note that the Traffic Amendment Bill 2012 (attached ) was Gazetted on 23rd March 2012 In brief, the amendments are:

* Number plates- When you sell your vehicle, you should surrender thenumber plates to the registrar of motor vehicles and when you fail to renew the insurance, remember to surrender the number plates to the registrar otherwise you risk being arrested and fined

* Overlapping- Driving on pavement or through a petrol station to avoid traffic- You risk a fine of Ksh 30,000 or 3 months imprisonment or BOTH

* Over speeding - when you over speed- You risk a fine of Ksh 10,000 or 3 months imprisonment or Both

* PSV operators- Should adhere to the uniforms and Michuki rules

* Motor Cycle operators- ONE PASSENGER only and the passenger and driver must be in reflective vests and helmets- otherwise you risk a fine of ksh10,000 and in default 12 months imprisonment

additional provitions include.

1. Life imprisonment for persons convicted of causing death by dangerous driving - giving it the same status as murder

2. Road blocks are to be gazette prior to being mounted by the police

3. Driving licenses of speed limit violators shall be suspended for not less than 3 years if the person has exceeded speed limit by more than 10 kph and if offence is repeated 3 or more times.

4. Mandatory eye test every 3 years for licensed drivers. And if you fail the test the license is withdrawn.

5. All law enforcement officers are now effectively mandated to deal with traffic issues with the abolition of the Traffic Department under the Kenya Police Service Act.

yaa i said it

Fri, 16 Mar 2012 12:20:00 +0000

I have always had a thing for tall ladies

I think they are generally much nicer

I think they are generally more talkative

I like me to look at her straight in the eye without stooping

I think I have a thing a for a slender type of woman

Not because I have anything against a little plump

But because and like to wrap mine hands around her waist

I want someone who can challenge me to get some cubes not acube

I like me some fair darker skin

Not that I have anything against this brownie types

But because when she glows everyone can blame me and not her missing melanin

But because i don’t want anyone to think she’s my sister and hit on her or ask me for a hook up or number

I like me some lovely pair of eyes

At the end of the day when her skin sags, body swells, hairgrays..her eyes will be intact

If I have to look at something for the rest of my life it might as well be beautiful

If I run away from tequila shots then why should I embrace blood shots

I like me a lovely smile

So that when we disagree, I will try hard to resolve the issues so I can see it again

So that I long to get back to the house and that way I spendless

So that the guest will feel at ease at the house

I want a confidant…one we will ride and die together

One I cry with, be vulnerable with, tell my weakness and show my pay slip to

Who will not judge me, or whine about me

One who will not tell on me even at gun point

I want someone who is deep…not one to float when I start talking

I want to read her a shakesperian poem without her running to Google the meaning of the words

I want someone who is not just into tv but one who would also enjoy art

I want someone I can bounce ideas from not one who is just absorbs them

I want someone who will a good mother for my kids

If at all I am to be exemplary as a parent I will need aformidable partner

one who will look for the whip so I can whip the kids and not hide it

one to carry the baby today night while I do the same tomorrow

I want a nice cook

If cooking is an art then let her be Leonardo, if it’s a science let her be Einstein

I don’t want someone who throws things around the kitchen and hopes the end product is palatable

If I have to bring the bacon home then it might as well be well cooked

I want someone with a cool, calm demeanor

I don’t want someone who causes a fight coz I recycled mybest socks

I want someone who approaches issues objectively not abrasively

I don’t want to always defend myself from fights she’s picks haphazardly

I want a crazy girl

Correction…one I can make go crazy and who can make me go crazy

I don’t want to die in the boredom of rationality and be limited to the bounds of reality

I don’t want someone who is too confined in the box

hags thing, kiss thing

Fri, 09 Mar 2012 14:00:00 +0000

Very awkward these handshake, hug and /or peck thing!

Back in the day –when life wassimpler, more meaningful, minus all the fakeness - saying a simple hi was just a handshake away. I mean, you’d just stretch out your hand, grasp the other persons’ hand, shake handsomely, and that would be it.

I don’t know when it evolved and became so complicated that every time I think of saying hi, I sweat, I panic, Ievade, and at the end, I end up not saying hi. It’s like an accident waiting to happen. Really. I have seen people stretch their hand only to meet with a breast. Imagine! That double coincidence of “let’s shake hands” never quite makes it to the other persons mind. Instead, the brain goes “ Hey, I haven’t seen him for so long! I need to extend my body for a hug”. So there you are, your hand in someone’s breasts, with a nice, warm smile saying, “Nice to meet…er….it…them?”

And then there’s the ‘let’s head-butt for a change’. Ok, this is where, you want to hug someone and you don’t know quite sure what side to start with. In most cases, you end up going on the same side. BANG! BANG! Nice to bang you..er..meet you too!

Aaaaaahhhh, then there’s the peck thing. Not one, but 3 kinds of pecks. There’s the left cheek, right cheek, left cheek again thing, which, depending on the side you start with (Cross your fingers you don’t start on the same side, in which case BANG BANG), you could end up doing it right. If you’re like me, and you’re still not sure if its right cheek, left cheek stop or continue, well, get in line and do the on-line course.

Moving on to the 2nd peck mode. This is the “you must know me that way” kinda peck.

How goes it? Well, it’s the right cheek, left cheek and lips peck. Woe unto you if you try this on someone “you don’t know that way”! It will be accompanied by a punch and a “so gross!”statement.

Matters thirdly now. The hoity-toity peck. Not so markedly different from option 1, but the main difference is you go left, kiss the air whilst not touching the other persons cheek. Repeat right then left again, and if necessary, mumble something hysterically or with a shriek, preferably “oh my god”, in a foreign language.

Then there’s the “we are boys” bump–in-the-chest thing. Mostly done by “boys” or “mates” who have a common past,or a common present.

Er, about that “touch knees, touch sole of the feet, wiggle you bottoms in glee” greeting, I’m not from the planet you’re from. Sorry.

To generally keep peace between people and nations, plus let the country move on to more productive, vision 2030 tasks – rather than concentrate on a mere “greeting”, here are some general,rule of the thumb guidelines;

Hand shakes

Best kept between acquaintances, business, associates and the likePlease note, the up and down movement on the thumb repeatedly, while performing the handshake, is best kept to your village mates. We don’t know what that means.Best not to tickle any part of anyone’s hand with one of your fingers. Unless of course, you want a thorough beating.Best taken when hands are not moist or wet.Hugs

Reserved for friends, family and close relatives (relatives may include your spouse, your mpango wa kando, and anyone else you have had a close relationship with, blood or otherwise)The above point not withstanding, please don’t hug your boss because “you don’t know him that way”. Unless of course, you do.Best not to quash someone Avoid the ‘let your fingers do the walking’ on someone’s back…especially below the waistline.Best not to linger in hug mode for too long……you….you……pervert! Pecks

Mostly, like our traffic, we start with the left Mostly work well if you have a foreign language to go with it. I mean, uhoro and koro don’t quite match with what you’re doing.If you reached for the dictionary to look up “hoity-toity”, believe me, this ones not for you. Move on.

The “we are boys” thing

Best not to linger. People might think otherwise. Get my drift? Good.Your boss is not your “boy”, today, tomorrow or when drunk.Best not to injure the sum total of your “boys” breast –plate. Don’t bump too hard!

Touch toes, touch feet, wiggle dance

Best done when you meet your planet mates, say after living on planet earth for 100yrs, or when you sight a UFO, with the insgnia – Been 1000yrs, earthling!

There you have it. Hopefully now,you’ll say hi when you see me again. What a life, er?

Counter measures You Can Follow to avoid car jackings

Thu, 16 Feb 2012 07:00:00 +0000

If approached by a stranger while you are in your car, drive off if possible and/ or use your horn to attract attention.
Be constantly on the look out for suspicious looking persons or vehicles and do not hesitate to report them to the police.
Always be on the alert for potential danger and be on the look out for possible escape routes and safe refuge along the way.
Know the area you driving in. Have a plan for each route you take. Where would you go,what would you do if….?
If your vehicle is bumped from behind and you do not feel comfortable with the individuals involved in the incident, or the location, drive to your nearest police station or a crowded area, gas station, mall, etc., or call for help.
Never open your vehicle window or door for any stranger.
Once you see a gun, i recommend comply immediately and fully.
If you see one gun think two, think three or more.
Let the carjacker know you are going to comply, by talking with them. Communicate your intentions and listen to their demands. This creates options that you may not have had otherwise.
Use the “Help Them Rob You” method. Guide them through the process, communicating your compliance, and willingness to give them all of your items of value.
If a suspicious person is near your unoccupied car, do not approach the vehicle. Keep walking to the nearest public area and ask or call for assistance.
Where possible, call ahead and request that someone open the gate for you on your arrival