Untalented Dreamer

Parodi; Kisah Ada Lembu Nak Jaga

skarn9@yahoo.com — Thu, 05 Jan 2012 10:27:00 +0000

Aku suka parodi.

Weird Al Yankovic dan Leslie Nielsen adalah antara yang terbaik menghasilkan parodi. Pecah perut kalau melayan diorang.

Parodi tu apa?

Parodi tu abah kau. Maksud parodi ialah karya ajukan berdasarkan karya asal. Tujuan sebenarnya adalah untuk melawak; tiada unsur-unsur serius.

Sebelum ni, komuniti Twitterjaya ada keluarkan satu parodi berdasarkan lagu Najwa Latiff; Cinta Muka Buku yang ditukarkan kepada Cinta Muka Bulu. Boleh tahan jugak tahap lawaknya.

Ramai yang 'LOL'.

Sekarang ada pulak yang baru, dari komuniti yang sama, parodi 'Move Like Jagger' berjaya dilawakkan kepada 'Lembu Nak Jaga'.

Ramai yang 'LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL'.

Kalau 'Move Like Jagger' mengisahkan, apa lagi 'Move Like Jagger', 'Lembu Nak Jaga' mengisahkan lagu tentang hubungan laki bini. Laki kena buli, bini kaki control. In the mean time, ada lembu nak kena jaga.

Aku merapu banyak pun tak guna.

Layan sudah.

Parodi ini adalah win.

OctTwtFest ; The Birth of an Awesome Historical Event.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Thu, 13 Oct 2011 06:49:00 +0000

I think October is an awesome month to be in Germany.

They have the Oktoberfest!

Oktoberfest is a beer festival that are held for 16-18 days and is is held annually in Munich, Germany. It's actually one of the famous event in the world with more than 5 millions people would gather just to drink.

Up to 17 million litres beers are served with in the span of 18 days of the event.

Only beers, nothing else.

And in the span of that 18 days, expect to the 5 millions of people throw up and pass out everywhere in Munich. It's really a fun an eventful gathering. Ha-ha!

Oh, I don't drink but damn, it's a good month to fancy them German girls.

I mean, who wouldn't?

Nein? Nein? Nein?

Oktoberfest; one of the greatest human invention.

Would love to go to Germany one and prolly get wasted there, just for the heck of it.

But, I'm in Malaysia.

I accept that fact very well.

And I don't drink.

That's a fact.

But but but but, one awesome fact for being in Malaysia; we have OctTwtFest!

Be there, and you won't be forever alone.

OctTwtFest or as mentioned on Twitter by the residence of Twitterjaya, #OctTwtFest; is a Twtup event (gathering of people that are connected through Twitter).

The idea of Twtup is to meet new people and meet new friends all over Malaysia. #OctTwtFest is a continuation of #Oct23rdTwtup that was held back in 23rd October 2010.

Because of the overwhelming response from the tweeps who attended the event, it is now an annual event called #OctTwtFest. Oh yeah!

I'M FREAKIN' EXCITED OVER THIS!

The goals of this event is not only for meeting new people in Malaysia, but they've planned to:-

Gather at least 1500 people at this event.

Beat the current Guinness Book of Record; 1,149 check-ins at a Twtup.

Unlock the Epic Swarm Badge (more than 1000 check-ins at a venue).

And my friend, this event is definitely an awesome one. An epic proportion of epicness event in Malaysia.

Not only that, they'll have :-

Live performances by tweeps and local celebrities.

Karaoke halls.

Movie marathon in their own mini cinema hall

PS3 game competition; FIFA, Pro Evolution Soccer, and Rock Band.

Indoor and outdoor bazaar.

October babies birthday celebrations.

Ongoing #twittercrush dedication.

Live feed of #OctTwtFest.

Twister competition and many other board games.

Tweet challenges. Prizes sponsored by DiGi.

Lucky draw.

Photo booth.

And various attractions around OctTwtFest venue.

Damn, that's a handful of things to do in one day...which is awesome!

If you're still looking for something to do this coming 22nd October, this is THE EVENT for you.

If you already have a plan, cancel it and choose OctTwtFest.

I can personally assure you that this event will go on without booze and drugs; tell that to your parents kiddo.

This event will be like Oktoberfest in Munich.

But minus the girls and beers and you'll get the gathering of human beings.

Look at the bright sight, you won't see any drunk fighting and people vomiting, passing out on the ground. And that sounds like a good deal for me. Ha-ha!

It's a great time to meet the awesome tweeps such as @karrotgold, @AidaSue, @ainaazizi, @aizadfahmy, @liyOthman and others as well.

And I know you are all psyched up to meet your #twittercrush; @ciksenah, @zombilla, @obefiend, @nadhirabrundage, @markonahsood and definitely @zullicious. Ha-ha!

This event will like a Woodstock, but less people. And as for the 'keyboard warriors', please come.

In OctTwtFest, you'll have the chance to meet up with people you've bashed over the internet.

Yes, you, you are the actual loser.

But hey, OctTwtFest do not judge, critic and discriminate people. You are accepted to join this eventful event.

Remember, you bashed them, have some balls to face 'em. Ha-ha!

Okay, now the serious stuff.

OctTwtFest; there will be FREE FLOW of halal food and drinks.

Yes my friend, you're a college student and you've blown your budget over that new iPhone, you can go to OctTwtFest. And later on, that smartphone of yours is gonna be useful to check-in at the event.

Makan already, and afterwards, you better check-in for the Epic Swarm Badge.

Be friendly, and meet new people. Expand your network and be part of this awesome historical event.

Looking forward to meet all of the tweeps in OctTwtFest!

Spread the news, bring your friends.

OctTwtFest will be held in :-

DiGi Telecommunications Sdn Bhd,

Lot 10, Jalan Delima 1/1

Subang Hi-Tech Industrial Park

40000, Shah Alam, Selangor Darul Ehsan

GPS: 3.0689098253134692, 101.56967639923096

See you there awesome earthlings!

Remember, this girls won't be there. Only in your head.

Further details can be found on octtwtfest.wordpress.com or follow @OctTwtFest on Twitter.

It Was a Great Season; Glory Glory

skarn9@yahoo.com — Wed, 18 May 2011 09:52:00 +0000

Feck, next time, don't bet against Barca.

Barcelona was majestic and masterclass.

Messi was out of this world.

I lost the bet and this is what I have to wear this week.

Manchester United, it was a great season.

Now aim for the 20th, bring in some new players.

Keep on believing and see you next season.

Glory glory Man United.

Happy Mother's Day; Appreciate.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Mon, 16 May 2011 19:16:00 +0000

This is my mom, and I love her so much.

Happy Mother's day, I'm here to make you proud.

2011; It's going to be Legendary..ER!!

skarn9@yahoo.com — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 09:12:00 +0000

Oh yeah awesomeness!!

2010 was so fast and damn, I couldn't accomplish much due to my lack of actually doing it.

I could even finish my 2010 plan, now it's already 2011. Now have to re-plan everything and it could take sometime. Dayyumm.

Now' I'm going to start 2011 by finishing my list of 2010 goals and accomplish it in 2011. Awesome. It's going to take some time and I'm going to do it. Yes, have to do it. And to do it, that's the problem. I'm lazy.

Let's just post the picture for the things I want to have in 2011.

A new bike.

A new car.

And i think that's about it. Damn. Just two? 2011 will be easy then. It can't be too much either, and I guess I want to have a Korean girls singing group as my 'pets' is not relevant. Bah!

For the new year, I just want to stay positive and try not to stress on the little things. I find that broad enough to be applied to all goals that I may come up over the time of 2011. I find it that whenever people set direct and specific goals, whenever they don’t achieve it, it’s disappointment.

Being positive isn’t as hard as trying to work out every single day if you were a person that didn’t work out at all in 2010. You just have to remind yourself that things could be worse and try to make light of the situation. It’s not the end of the world, life goes on and so should you.

Not stressing about the little things and staying positive goes hand and hand, I would think.

Not unreasonable goals, I would say.

2011, here I come.

Oh, one more thing.

2011, will be with the abs.

But without the workout. Damn.

Dammit!!

I'm a Proud Malaysian!! Roaarrrrr!!!

skarn9@yahoo.com — Thu, 30 Dec 2010 06:12:00 +0000

I was in the crowd to celebrate. Damn we are awesome.

This is the view from my shitty phone.

ROARRRRR!!!! This is Malaysia!!!!

Our new heroes!! Keep supporting them Malaysians!!

AFF Suzuki Cup top scorer: Safee Sahli.

Safee Sahli, you gave me enough reason to go out and buy Malaysian jersey with your name printed at the back. Epic awesomeness!!

Abe kelate kito semat habihhhhh!! Mu meme terer!!!

Khairul Fahmi; he is only 5' 8'' but he's standing tall for all of Malaysians. Awesome reaction to deny the penalty and what a shot-stopper. World class.

Now Malaysians, don't stop believing!!!

WE ARE THE CHAMPIONS!!

.....

.......

..........

Back to Anfield.

Another facepalm.

A home defeat to the Wolves?? Damn, y'all are fucked.

Oh hell yeah, YNWA. You'll Never Win Anything.

Awesome Malaysia

skarn9@yahoo.com — Mon, 27 Dec 2010 09:55:00 +0000

Our hero, Safee Sali.

Malaysia won 3-0 against Indonesia.

I'm so fucking proud of my boys.

But, some idiot has to ruin it for Malaysia.

He flashed a green laser on the Indonesian players' faces and interrupted the game.

Way to go man.

But, he is in deep shit right now because while he was playing with the laser, someone snapped his pictures.

......

..........

.................

..........................

..........................................

...................................................

There he is!!

And they also found one more person as well.

.............................

.......................................

.................................................

................................................................

Total blindness!!!Pew!Pew!Pew!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAAHAH~!!!!

You guys gave a lame lame excuse because y'all lost.

Malaysia Di Hatiku, Indonesia Di Kakiku.

Berba The Man

skarn9@yahoo.com — Sat, 27 Nov 2010 18:47:00 +0000

Suddenly, you look so dashing.

I sold you off last week and tonight you scored 5 goals.

Damn you, asshole.

Berbatov became the only fourth player in Premier League history to score five in a game after Andy Cole, Shearer and Defoe.

Awesome!

source: imafootballaddict

Football; Joke of The Week.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Wed, 24 Nov 2010 11:15:00 +0000

EPIC Joke of The Week

Hilarious. You're fucking hilarious.

Tottenham kicked their ass in the nick of time last weekend and Braga chew them with a 2-0 win.

Now. Laugh people laugh.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA~!!!

Now your Champions League spot is in trouble.

Awesome! :D

source: imafootballaddict

My Awesome Research; Women That Guys Love To Like.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 05:02:00 +0000

Last night, I've spent my time watching 'Scott Pilgrim vs The World'. For some reason, this movie is still not in Malaysia but heck, it has been 5 months old in the State, i'm done waiting. The trailer was too fucking awesome.

Thus, hail illegal downloading!

I'm glad i'm a comic books nerd.

Throughout the whole movie, I couldn't stop myself from..well, having a crush on the girls in it.

Guys, it's normal. it's okay to do this. It's when you're having crushes on the hot guys in the movie, then..you don't want your parents to know about that do you?

Girls, it's not fair when y'all are ogling, admiring and having crushes on the guys in the movies but when we did it, y'all are calling us perverts.

Tell you what, the girls in the movies are like our dreams. More like a wet dream. It's like something we can't have. And don't worries, it's totally safe. We want them, but we can't have them. That's why we ended up being with you.

We really want to drive a Ferrari, but what we can afford is a Kancil.

Kapish? Cool.

Now, girls crushes are pretty much the same, the have dicks.
We couldn't care less about them.

Our crushes in movies are a lot more..hmmm...how to say this, a lot more than you?

Now, off to the girls!!!

We start off with Mary-Elizabeth Winstead and Ellen Wong. They played Ramona Flowers and Knives Chau respectively, in the comic based movie, 'Scott Pilgrim vs. The World'.

I like both. Yes, i'm greedy.

Mary-Elizabeth is damn hot; of course with less clothing and Ellen as Knives Chau is so fucking adorable. Now, the challenge, dream both of them on the same bed, with you. A white girl and an Asian girl.

ZZOMFFGGGGGGGGGG!!!! It's so awesome!!!

Why we love them?
Gotta be honest, as a comic books nerd, we tend to like and be in love with the girls in the comics. And when they appear on screen to be so fucking hot, we are totally in love.

But then our crushes does not stop at that.

You know girls, skinny figure don't excite us. We prefer a little more meat. Let me show you the example of hotness and how you flaunt them.

Reason why I'm loving red heads; definitely not Hayley Williams.

Christina Hendricks, all men love her because of her full figure. She's damn hot. Watch Mad Men. Don't ask me where, Google it or whatever.

Why we love her?
She's the new look!! She got the fair white skin, full figured body and to add some hautness, she got the red hair. Omaigod, and she's 35. And they're 38.

Yeah, you know what I'm talking about. I'll leave it to your imaginations.

And then comes...

Make sure your brain memory is sufficient.

Ahh...Megan Fox. Girls just love to hate her. I know y'all are jealous of her.

Because she's damn hot!!!

Why we love her?
She's hot, she's hot, she's hot. She's not adorable, cute or beautiful. We call this type of girl; epic hottest of the hottest hot. She got the look, the body and definitely the ability to fill our brains with dirty thoughts. She got that kind of power. So, feel free to roam around our heads. We don't mind.

Oh, local taste!

Awek idaman Malaya.

In Malaysia, I'm very glad that we have the beautiful Lisa Surihani. I bet if you want to bring her own to meet your family, they wouldn't mind you marrying her.

Why we love her?
Definitely because she's beautiful. And mainly because she got the 'good girl' image and she's not slutty like..well, a certain someone here. She appreciates her fans and she's a sweet person. And she can act!!!

The question is, who's the lucky guy?

Meet the one who kissed a girl. And she likes it.

Sexiest woman alive.

Ahhh...Her name is Katy Perry, she’s a singer and a bad-ass.

Why we love her?
Come on. Look at her. First of all, she was crowned the hottest woman alive in Maxim’s Hot 100 List, bitches! And why wouldn’t they?

The eyes, the skin, the leg and..ahem..the *cough36dcoughbreastcough*..

When you listen to her singing you forget about all bad things and you just let that magic voice take you to a wonderful place.

Who wouldn't want that.

Her significant other is Russell Brand.

It's beauty and what the fuck??

When we looked at Russell Brand, it gave us hope. A guy who looks like that, could land the hottest girl on earth, I think we can do that as well. Oh yeah, most of the good looking guys are either taken or gay. Girls, go for the odd looking one.

You'll be happy 'cause he won't cheat.

You'll just be thinking how your children will look like.

That's some of the girls that we men or you call it guys, love to dream of. Oh yeah, sometimes our dreams are too big and we prefer lots of girls.

I think these fit the criteria.

Choosing is not an option.

Enters Girls' Generation!!

Why we love them?
Well, they're Koreans. The south one, not the north one; that's the fucking commies. From my observation, they are...well, frankly, those who watched Asian porn, you know what to think. Just stop thinking that for a while. They are all beautiful, cute and adorable at the same time. This is due to the 'cheerleader effects'. But, differently, they are attractive. It's just that I prefer them as a whole. I want the whole group, not just one person.

And the song is always better when they sing in a group. Ahh..now my mind is working.

Hey, why have one when you can have all? Capitalism rocks!!

Y'all have your favorites, and I got mine.

I've left out a lot, but this is what I prefer.

As for girls, feel free to ogle and love, and have dreams about the guys in the movies or on the football fields. We don't mind and we promise we won't call you girls horny whores or any equivalents to that.

Remember, you can't have them. You only have us.

Yes, oddball.

Summary of The Week

skarn9@yahoo.com — Sun, 14 Nov 2010 19:31:00 +0000

Comeback of The Week

Macheda and Vidic. Roar!!

Comeback King, suited Manchester United. Down 2-0 against Aston Villa with Ashley Young and Albrighton scored a goal each, United fought back to salvage a point in the last minute of the game. Macheda's rocket ball and Vidic's goal saved them.

Manchester United is still unbeatable in Europe, along with Real Madrid.

Hero of The Week

Gyan Asamoah; because he inspired The Black Cats against Chelsea.

Gyan Asamoah is not a technically good player but his work rate were effective against Chelsea; who lost Alex and Terry in the middle, have to settle in with Ivanovic and Ferreira in the middle. Welbeck, Zenden and Gyan ran the show. Result, 3-0 to Sunderland.

Kudos to Steve Bruce.

Joke of the Week

What revival? Lol.

You guys are the funniest when you lost.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHHHAHA...........HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAHAHAH.......!!!!!!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHHAA....HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH......!!!!!! :'D

I think that summed up everything.

source: imafootballaddict

Manchester United Vs. Liverpool; Awesome!!!

skarn9@yahoo.com — Sun, 19 Sep 2010 18:50:00 +0000

I was tricked into working with them. Shit.

Manchester United vs. Liverpool.

One of the high-profile and a must watch match of the season.

It didn't disappoint.

There's something about Berbatov. When you curse him, say something bad about his mama, he scored. Tonight, I bet he got a lot of people cursing, that's why he scored a hatrick. When the lame Berbatov can score a hatrick against your team, your team gotta suck bad time.

He was even better than Fernando Torres and Ngog!

Boo!

Though I had to work with the enemy; actually I was tricked into working with 'em, I had a blast yelling my lungs out and I was a bit dizzy at the end, I had fun pissing off the Liverpool's fans at the event.

Yelling out "goallllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllllll~!!!!!!In your face!!!!!!!" three times was not a good idea at a Liverpool's event.

So I just had to do this in the end.

My Awesome Research; Why A Woman Has A Close Male Friend?

skarn9@yahoo.com — Fri, 17 Sep 2010 04:01:00 +0000

Okay, now time to reveal my awesome research.

Why a woman has a close male friend?

This means that the male dude is probably interested in her, which is why he hangs around so much.

She sees him strictly as a friend. This always starts out with, you're a great guy, but I don't like you in that way.

This is roughly the equivalent for the guy of going to a job interview and the company saying, You have a great resume, you have all the qualifications we are looking for, but we're not going to hire you. We will, however, use your resume as the basis for comparison for all other applicants. But, we're going to hire somebody who is far less qualified and is probably an alcoholic. And if he doesn't work out, we'll hire somebody else, but still not you. In fact, we will never hire you. But we will call you from time to time to complain about the person that we hired.

That's about it.

Why women do that? I don't know. Beat me.

But I'll try to find out more on this matters. Until the next research, have a great day.

Oh yes, she's a friend alright.

Boo!

Syawal; A Month of Celebration.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Fri, 10 Sep 2010 19:49:00 +0000

This is the part, where it is so sad.

Ramadhan has ended. Damn it was a swift one. And it is one Ramadhan to regret if you don't perform as much as good deeds as you can.

Oh. I just realized I missed out on that on a last day of Ramadhan. Awesome.

Let's pray we could meet another Ramadhan coming next year.

We've woke up early in the morning to have our sahur. And starved during the day. Bought a lot of food in the bazaar. Enjoyed great feast during the dusk. Did the terawih prayer. Paid the zakat. Made a lot of donations. Be good to others. Had a great Raya shopping in Masjid India. Sleep during lunch time and some didn't fast at all. Eating Maggi mee and McD's take away in the afternoon.

Whatever made you happy.

But, as Syawal is a month of celebration as we gone through Ramadhan with hardship, patience and perseverance. It's a month of forgiveness, where arch enemies forgives each other and though we will do it again, we forgive 'em anyway.

This is where get to meet our distant relatives, balik kampung, wear all the new clothes and simply get busy; eating lemang, rendang, lontong, ketupat, dodol....Ohh~heavenly food of Eid Mubarak.

Do remember those who are less fortunate.

May your Eid Mubarak be filled with joy, happiness and blessings from Allah.

Do forgive me of all my wrong doings, said and done.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir & Batin.

Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri, Maaf Zahir dan Batin.

Ramadhan; and I'm Alive To Celebrate It.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 06:03:00 +0000

Ahh...it's a refreshing month. A holy month. And a great month to do good deeds and be a good person. It's also a good month to reflect on yourself and think back what a douche you've become towards God and others, and please be thankful that you're still alive to celebrate this month.

Oh yeah, beside that, it's fooooooddddddddd!!! :D

Food and I are inseparable. Yes, very true. I would forgive you if you lie, punch, kick or even try to rape me, but if you mess with my food, I will kill your family. Not you, but your family, and then I will torture you.

Okay, back to the topic. Here's my guide to the awesome existence of food during this awesome month.

1.) First, you go to a bazaar or pasar Ramadhan. How to find it, look. If you're blind, sniff the food(plus, would be reading this?). Find the biggest bazaar possible, so you'll have varieties of foodies there. Cuci mata is prohibited, bulan Ramadhan. But a glimpse is okay, untuk menduga iman.

Lautan manusia; a good indication that it's an awesome bazaar.

2.) Second, find the food. Don't follow your head, follow your heart. Spend a lot. That's the best way so you won't regret. Trust me.

Ayam percik oh-so-good.

Roti John; size matter.

Murtabak

Ayam Golek

Omaigod I love kuih.

Ikan bakar.

Lots of colorful drinks.

3.) And last but not least, don't identify and buy, buy all. Go crazy. It's okay, it's once-a-year thing.

Now, I'm wishing you a great Ramadhan ahead, have a great fasting month and do invite to buka puasa. I would love to eat your food. God bless you, maaf zahir dan batin. May you get all the greatness in this month.

It's True; Chill Out.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Thu, 12 Aug 2010 02:21:00 +0000

source: stuffnoonetoldme

Have A Wish?; If You Do..

skarn9@yahoo.com — Thu, 05 Aug 2010 09:10:00 +0000

source:stuffnoonetoldme

Stuff No One Told You; It's Awesome Anyway.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Tue, 20 Jul 2010 19:07:00 +0000

source:stuffnoonetoldme

Comprende?

Good. Now go have fun.

The Day She Left; To Be Eaten By Godzilla, Saved By the Ultraman.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Tue, 20 Jul 2010 18:59:00 +0000

Yes, the title doesn't lie.

Sue, this is for you.

Soraya.

She's a childhood friend I met in school. Easily described as skinny, loud, pitchy like a vuvuzela and slightly a drama queen. Just slightly. I used to have a crush on her back then, well, because she's one of my closest friend, and she's from the opposite gender. If I had a crush on my dudely friend, I would be gay. Though the traits are there, but I prefer to be on the safe side.

Okay, back to the topic.

She's extremely smart. And brilliant!....when it comes to reading books. Sometimes, the dumb blonde moment could strike and she could OMG! SERIOUSLY?? Easily, up until today, she can't read my sarcasm.

Yes, very serious.

But, so that she won't hate for saying that, I'ma say that she's awesomely smart. I admire her for that. Please, do come to me if you need the-over-the-top-optimistic-advices from me. I would never say no to you, bow down and I'll show you the way.

After years of studying, now you got a chance to Japan. I told you already, take a chance and enjoy your time there. I'm proud of what you've become. Oh, now you already toned down on the pitchy voice and less likely to be a drama queen. Though the dumb blonde moment occasionally occur; you are way better today and I expect you to grow even more when you're living on your own.

I got a chance to get together with the friends, to send her off to Japan and well, I'm gonna miss you. Please be back in one piece and I'm always praying for you. I'm fucking proud of you.

Remember, be very wary of Godzilla and even if you're eaten alive, your Ultraman is there to save you.

It doesn't make any sense, but just use your imagination. Or I should get some sleep.

Out of all the places, we spent our time in KFC. Yes, awesome. If you notice, Kawaii element is there.

Oh yes, since you're going to Japan, kawaiiii~!! Dude, smile!!

Ean conquered the Godzilla. Boo!

Actually, Sue was crying just before the picture was snapped.

And then, she left for Japan.

I'm expecting to get updates from you every now and then. See you when you get back and I'm expecting a lot of goodies. Have fun and be awesome. With love, be safe.

My Awesome Research; 9 Deadly Words Used By Women.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Thu, 15 Jul 2010 00:30:00 +0000

Well, I have spent my whole life researching the opposite sex. Seriously, you can't read them. Women are unpredictable. So don't ever try and act like you know everything, if you do, you're just another douche. We just have to know the what they are saying and retreat. You don't wanna get caught in the storm; basically, it's their mood swings. Not that I'm complaining, it's just I don't fancy it much.

Okay, here are 9 deadly words used by women. Take note assholes.

1) Fine.
This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

2) Five Minutes.
If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

3) Nothing.
This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

4) Go Ahead.
This is a dare, not permission. Don’t Do It!

5) Loud Sigh.
This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

6) That’s Okay.
This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That’s okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

7) Thanks.
A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here – This is true, unless she says ‘Thanks a lot’ – that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say "you’re welcome" that will bring on a "whatever").

8 ) Whatever.
Is a woman’s way of saying FUCK YOU!

9) Don’t worry about it, I got it.
Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself.

World Cup 2010; The Impact.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 12:21:00 +0000

Luckily the World Cup is over. I'm glad I could live to be part of the historical event. And sorry for the boss that you have to see this for a month..

I promise to do my best after this..:D

p/s: No football for month?Sheit. What do I do?

La Furia Roja; What A Celebration.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Tue, 13 Jul 2010 01:46:00 +0000

Finally, Spain has been registered in history to win the World Cup. Being the under achiever for so long, they've been consistently great after Euro' 2008. And the rest, is history.

They ruled Europe, now they rule the rest of the world.

Andres Iniesta has been elected as the Man of The Match.

Nice strike with a great goal followed.

It's gonna be a long long months without football.*sigh*

Now off to holidays!

I'm A FOOTBALL Addict

World Cup: The Story So Far

skarn9@yahoo.com — Sun, 04 Jul 2010 00:12:00 +0000

Since Brazil got kicked out because of Felipe Melo(son of a bitch), I've taken a vow of silence. I can't go out, I can't meet my friends, I can't go to work in peace because all I got was 'boooooooooo Brazil' from all of them. Shit. I have to shut myself off from the world for a while.

But still, the excitements are there to be enjoyed.

Here's the friggin' awesome recap.

Luis Suarez with the new 'Hand of God'. Nice.

The former 'Hand of God' broke down. Traumatized. Haha!

Germany was awesome. Dumped Argentina out with 4-0 win. Miroslav Klose closing in to Ronaldo's 8 goals World Cup record.

Achtung! Yes, Messi were 'halpless'. He got no Iniesta and Xavi to supply him the pass like in Barcelona. Boo!

Barcelona's new hit-man; David Villa shot Spain to the semi-final, with one of the most dramatic match in World Cup 2010. Kudos to Paraguay. Hell yeah!

Felipe Melo-Fine at first half, for setting up a goal for Robinho, but second half, I felt like he deserved a butt-rape. He headed the ball in his own net and then earn a red card for a tackle and a foot stamp on Arjen Robben. He should hang his head in shame. What an asshole.

Yes, I'm still around to enjoy the World Cup to the very end.

SOCCERJUNKIE.

Why We Should Stop Complaining; Why?

skarn9@yahoo.com — Wed, 30 Jun 2010 15:00:00 +0000

I finished my Friday prayer, and sat down for a while. I saw the TNB's cafe opened after the prayer. So I had my lunch there. The food was nice and really really cheap. I enjoyed it. While I was eating, i noticed there's an old man sitting down at the mosque's pillar. I noticed a bag and a white walking stick with him. He's blind.

I finished my lunch, washed my hand and went off to put on my shoes, and it was near where the old blind man was sitting. As I put on my shoes, I just had to talk to him.

"Pakcik dah makan?"

He didn't answer me. I asked the same question again.

Same response.

I put my hand on his hand and asked him the question again. Only then he noticed me. He didn't answer. I asked him again and he turn his right ear towards me. Oh, I guess he wasn't able to hear well with his left ear.

"Belum makan lagi. Pakcik bawak bekal ni. Kejap lagi Pakcik makan la..", he answered.

"Pakcik, kalau pakcik nak makan, jom la, kat belakang ni kantin.."

"Tak apa..pakcik bawak bekal ni, tak nak membazir..", he refused of my offer.

So, I chat a bit with him while I was putting on my shoes. And as I was going, I held his hand and put some money in it. He turned his face towards me and thanked me for it.

I guess I am lucky. I'm glad I can help.

I was away on company trip to Bali. I had a blast. Love the beach, love the people, love everything about that trip. Love it very much. In the end of the trip, before we part off from the tour guide, he asked, as for feedbacks, which part of the trip that we didn't like.

Sadly, few of my colleagues had to complain. Petty complains; bad food, don't like the time spent travelling from each place to another, not enough information about the trip and places we went to, no help with the luggages.

Wow, seriously people??

Got a chance to go on holidays on company expenses, 5-stars hotel, a great place; Bali it is. Still, y'all got something to complain about??

Impressive.

I've had friends, came to me and bitch about work, people, life etc. Yeap, I don't mind listening, and if there's something I could do to help you out, I would do it. But please, if it's too small of a problem, a petty complain, I might be thinking of smacking you. You might not see me do it, but probably inside my head, I'm smacking you.

What do I mean by petty complains? If you bitched about your boyfriend, girlfriend, friends, work, no money, you don't know how to cook scramble egg, you're fat, she's fat, he's fat, you're ugly, you're adopted, your boss is gay, bla-bla-blah. Hey, instead of focusing so much energy in bitching about your life, you could have done something about it? Don't you realize it?

When you complains, it will get worse.

When you complains, it will keep on happening to you.

When you complains, it won't settle a thing.

Solution; don't complain. Easy.

Yeah, shit happens. But hey, take your time and look at the big picture. You still have something that others don't have right? The thing is, if we really have something to complain about, please take a look around.

If you are able to read this, you are very very lucky. So please, be grateful. Quit being a little bitch.

Be thankful.

ENJOY YOUR LIFE.

Where I Was; A Celebration in Perak.

skarn9@yahoo.com — Tue, 22 Jun 2010 18:42:00 +0000

I've been busy with life and kinda cut myself of the net for quite sometime(work,business and lotsa catching up with my sleep. Did you know that adults too need sufficient sleeps of 8 hours so we can be fully energized? YES, that was what I was doing. SLEEPING.)

I've traveled to few places recently, been having fun and I wanna blog about it.

I went to Perak recently. My house mate's brother was getting married and he invited all of us to be there. Plus it'll be a traditional 'kampung' ceremony whereas all of the villagers got together and help out with the wedding. Oh, I know one thing for sure, FUN!

The wedding was going to be on weekends and we planned to spend 4 days there. Thoroughly packed our bags and headed for Kampung Senin in Perak. Kampung Senin is a village in Parit, a nearly 5 hours drive by the old road and through the highway, 4 hours( which i don't get it. One hour difference by highway?? Sheit, what's the point??).

We left our house at 10 p.m.

After one quick stop at the petrol station that have McDonald's, we kinda spent our time 'wisely' to eat up and more eating. Plus, it's good to travel with a full tummy! :D If something happened, we would die happy.

Ok, Brada used the old road to Parit and damn it was dark. No street lights. There were street light, but no street lights(notice the different?). Only one street light at one sharp turn (in case you don't see the big ass sign that showed an arrow to turn left or right, they put one street light so you can see the sign and run over it, it's true). Brada was driving really slow just in case there were buffaloes or cows on the road. And the skies were unbelievably clear and millions of stars were visible. Sheit, I know in K.L i could count the visible stars.

We got to his house at 4 a.m, it was freaking dark and how the heck he managed to find his house??Dang. We greeted her mother and went to sleep in the living room.

DAY 1

I woke up finding Brada's nieces playing around and watching TV. Azree and Ejan too, opened their eyes to the kids', I would say, loudness. And had great laughs at their answers to their grandma, sarcastic and it was great.

Woke up at 10 in the morning and heck we got nothing to do after we showered. I wore a sarong because I wear it everyday and they wore it because they felt like it suits the 'kampung' environment. It was Friday and the only thing to do was Friday prayer at noon. We waited(after we had a big breakfast of course).

After the prayer, we try to find something to do, but only lunch was there to be settled. Yes, we really settled it. Nice lunch. A kick-ass tasty 'kampung' lunch. Oh yeah. Then, we waited for any instruction on what-supposed-to-be-done for the wedding, but sadly, nothing. We just sat around the places. For hours(damn,kampung life is so freaking slow).

And this is Ayunie. She's adorable and she's a bully. She bullied Azree and Ejan but not me.

Brada told us that the preparation for the wedding reception will only start on Saturday evening. So the next question we asked him was,'What to do till then?'.

The answer,'Let go buy some groceries and jalan-jalan'. Okay, good enough.

We had a tour around Parit. And this was the Parit Clock Tower that was built back in 1957, as a monument for Malaysia's Independent Day.

That's about it. Hehe.

Then, we wanna go to Sungai Perak. Mandi sungaiiiiiiii!!!!

But first, according to Brada, we have to look for a suitable place to 'mandi sungai', if not we die. Only Ejan and him can swim, Azree and I cannot swim. We are natural sinkers(no arguments,we can't swim).

Armed with no swimming capabilities, we searched for the perfect spot to swim. We have our own guide which is 12 years old Brada's nephew. Nice.

We found the first spot and it was a new port built there for those who wanna fish. We look around and obviously I'm not jumping in. I don't wanna dai drowning, so not cool. So staying out of the water was the best option.

Then we look for the second spot. Found it, a lil' bit further, but still, for a non-swimmer, NO.

So we hang a bit and left.

With the depth measured and everything. Not a good place to dai. But we had fun that.

When we got back, oh, pelamin dah siap.

And late that evening, futsal against the next village, Kampung Layang-layang. No one took pictures and as usual, the last goal win. We, Kampung Senin lost because of that stupid rule.

After Maghrib, we got nothing to do. Ejan was sleeping. And made fun of a sleeping person was the only fun we could do.

Playing with kids was also the fun things to do.

We boiled the egg for the wedding receptions.

And we waited for the eggs to be done. Yes, we have lotsa spare time.

Oh, the karaoke is ready. So we made noise.

And night time felt longer. We were sleepy at 11p.m so we decided to lepak at the bus-stop. Hey, in kampung, loitering is the funnest thing to do. And we walk around with sarong and sarong was hip! It was so damn dark. Spooky. We couldn't see the road or the walkway, just pure guessing and walk.

We did nothing. Just hang out, listen to songs and the sounds of crickets. We burnt the mosquito repellent just to keep thousands of 'em away. It was dark, really dark. Wahlawei. Easy life here.

DAY 2

We try to wake up late, but it wasn't an option.

"WOI! BANGUN LA!!! SEMUA DAH DATANG DAH NIII!!"

Like a bunch of soldier, we heard the order loud and clear, and wow, we woke up real fast and folded the mattress real quick and went straight to the bathroom. Sheit.

Brada's mom woke us up with lots of nagging and it was refreshing. Had a quick breakfast and had to follow the rombongan to the next village. Noon already? Oh, it's the bride's wedding reception, the groom's reception will be on Sunday.

Ayunie with Azree as her 'toy'. Not me.

And she's adorable.

Oh yeah, we're ready to escort the groom. Brada is the best man.

Oh, it was a double wedding!! Haha!! Ejan had to hold the umbrella back there. We had a blast eating and taking care of the little kids. Fun!!!(though it was hot as hell.)

Azree tought Ayu on how to use the camera(so she would stop bullying him) and now, she can't stop taking pictures.

I was tired, and we all do. Ayu snapped our picture.

And, Ayu snapped Ejan inside. Told 'cha it was a tiring day.

It was a hot hot day. So we decided to go swimming. Brada's nephew, Alop, said there's a place that's perfect for non-swimmer. Yeayy!!!(shut up, I can't swim.)

Found a cool spot. Yeah, now time to swim in Sg. Perak!!

Woo! It was a great place to be. See, very nostalgic. I don't know why.

Awesome.

I had to take care of the little girls 'cause I don't swim. Ejan was all the way in the middle. He was not in the picture. Somewhere in the river. Dang, what a way to cool off the heat. The river's current was strong. One more reason to not swim. But luckily I'm a heavy dude, it helped. Time was well spent. Love it!

DAY 3

Woke up with a loud yell form Brada's mother once again. All of his relatives arrived already. So the house was full! And of course we didn't know what to do. Plus, we haven't shower yet. Have to wait for our turn. Dang. Malu oh.

All the tables and chair were already set last night. The canopy too(we did it ourselves).

And the cooking started early in the morning(we were sleeping). So I was the last one to shower and when I was ready and out, there were two task I could do. Go out, under the heat and help out with serving the food and drink, clearing the table and usher the guest. Or I could do what I do best, cook. So, I offer all the makcik-makcik to cook for the bride and groom. They were surprise, and I ended up being the only male in the kitchen and working under the roof with fans swerving on your face is better than out there, under the sun. Plus, it's a good way to impress all the makcik's(boleh terus jadi menantu, dahsyat).

Azree and Ejan have to help out, in the heat. Padan muka.

Not a masterpiece, but heck, in 2 hours time, this is what I was able to do.

It was a simple reception.

But, it was perfect.

Since the bride and groom didn't eat much(they have to look beautiful anyway), we came to the rescue.

Yes, very true. Who wrote this is a genius!

Later on in the evening, we went to cool off once again. Gotta love the Sg.Perak.

For dinner, we have to buy satay. And the only satay place they have was in Bota. We have to cross the Sg.Perak and go the other side to buy the satay. Yes, exaggeration. It's quite far if you're walking.

Wow, 5 p.m to 9 p.m only? Queue up some more? Seriously?

And yes, very serious.

A lot of people, and a lot of satay. We had a great meal that night.

And yes, we definitely enjoyed our days here. Thanks to Brada's mum for the hot milo every night.

Day 4

Time to leave.

Had a great time in Kampung Layang-Layang. Really want to come here again. Ayunie cried when we left. Poor girl. Alop and Nabila, Brada's nephew and niece were great. Gonna miss our time here.

Brada's mum made us great breakfast, lunch and dinner. Love the late supper and love the way she yelled at us. Cool. Very niggaish. Totally appreciate everything.

Sg.Perak was awesome. Satay Bota tasted great.

Gotta say, kampung life is not bad at all.

Here's a series of photos Ayunie took before we went home.

We just woke up and Ayunie was bored.

I think Ejan was still sleeping.

Awesome breakfast.

Ayunie can't stop snapping our pics.

That's about it. We had to leave and work. Time well spent.

p/s: Will be back soon!