Through culture shock, seeing people die of HIV/AIDS and malaria, poorly run hospitals, starvation, crime, alcoholism, prostitution, drugs, sex trafficking, beggars, racism, lack of jobs, people who don’t know Jesus, and the list goes on. God opened our eyes to a lot this past year while we were in South Africa and Zimbabwe.

Aaron and I also had an extremely heart-breaking event in the last couple months. We unexpectedly had a miscarriage at the end of October, the week we got back to the US. We were very excited for this precious child of God and its definately been an emotional few weeks mourning the loss of this little one. We know that God is sovereign and has bigger plans than we can ever imagine.

We also have decided to stay in Louisville for another year to year-and-a-half. We realize that God has put a love in our hearts for South Africa. We want to be in Cape Town long-term and are going to research how to fully immigrate. There is so much opportunity in this beautiful country and also numerous ways to serve the people there.

2009 has been a year of extreme hardships but also of extreme growth. As it says in Jeremiah 29:11, “For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

Even though there is still so much hardship all over the world, God is still good and He is worthy to be praised. I have a new understanding of what it means to long for Heaven and for the day where there will be no pain and suffering when we are joined with our Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.

“For our citizenship is in heaven, from which also we eagerly wait for a Savior, the Lord Jesus Christ; who will transform the body of our humble state into conformity with the body of His glory, by the exertion of the power that He has even to subject all things to Himself.” Philippians 3:20-21

I went straight to be with Jesus, but I’m waiting for you here.

Many dwelling here where I live, waited years to enter in.

Struggled through a world of sorrow, a world marred with pain and sin.

Thank you for the life you gave me, it was brief but don’t complain.

I have all Heaven’s Glory, suffered none of earth’s great pain.

Thank you for the name you gave me. I’d have loved to bring it fame.

But if I’d lingered in earth’s shadows, I would have suffered just the same.

So sweet family don’t you sorrow. Wipe those tears and chase the gloom.

I went straight to Jesus’ arms from my loving Mother’s womb.

Author Unknown

As she was talking, I noticed her precious little son who was 20 months old but looked like he was about 8 months old. He was very small and frail but had the biggest smile that melted my heart.

As the woman kept talking, she proceeded to ask for money. We were given strict rules to not give out money to beggars. Very gently my husband told her that there is a lot of need in Cape Town and it would be wrong for us to start handing out money. He then made it very clear that we are here to help, we will not ignore her. She reacted very well and said it was great talking to us. As she waved and said goodbye, the little boy waved and smiled really big.

I will never forget this mother and baby. Their images are etched in my heart.

Psalm 104:24, 30

How many are your works, O Lord! In wisdom you made them all; the earth is full of your creatures…When you send your spirit, they are created, and you renew the face of the earth.

I feel like God has been giving me a burden for the people of Africa and specifically for women and children. God is daring me to move in a direction that is more glorifying to Him. I know that God is sovereign and that He loves every single one of us just the same. It is hard for me to fathom that thousands upon thousands are dying each day due to starvation and poverty. I know that I can not solve this problem, but together we can help shed the love of Christ among all the nations. My heart desires to see this happen.

Daily Strength with Joe Stowell

“They were longing for a better country—a heavenly one.” Hebrews 11:16

Have you ever felt the pull of past comforts, wishing things could go back to the way they used to be?

Imagine how Abraham felt. Having once lived in Ur of the Chaldeans, a highly sophisticated culture in ancient times, Abraham responded to the call of God to move to Canaan—a journey which, quite frankly, had its fair share of rough moments. Like the time when there was a great famine (Genesis 12:10) or when Pharaoh took Abe’s wife Sarah into his palace (12:15) or the years that Sarah spent as a barren woman when God had promised to make Abraham’s offspring as countless as the stars (15:5) or (déjà vu) the time when the king of Gerar took Sarah into his harem (20:2) or—the ultimate test—when God asked Abraham to sacrifice his long-awaited son Isaac (22:2).

I can almost picture it: Sarah sitting in her tent sulking, telling Abraham, “Remember back in Ur when I used to meet with all of my friends for tea at 3:00 on Friday? I really miss that. What on earth are we doing out here?”

Imagine if Abraham had said, “I know, I miss tennis with my buddies. Let’s go back.” What if he had caved in to the pull of past comforts and had decided to go back to where life was more familiar and more rewarding? Although God had made some amazing promises to Abraham and Sarah, I can’t help but wonder if in the dark moments they struggled with their decision to follow God.

On our journey of faith, you can count on it—the road will be littered with challenges. And the temptation will be to look back and say, “I wish my life could go back to the way it used to be.” When someone offends you, maybe you say to yourself: I remember when I could not only get mad, I could get even. Or when you’re alone at the computer, you think about the rush of adrenalin you used to feel when you looked at forbidden sites. It’s easy to think of how rewarding it would feel to spend all your money on yourself like you used to. The list of things in your past life that beckon you back is long.

But remember who is behind the urge to put your life in reverse. Satan delights to lure us back into the sludge of life the way it used to be—the toxic dump of what ultimately leads to regret, guilt, and brokenness.

So, while life may seem challenging going forward with God, we need to remind ourselves that in spite of the challenges, God is taking us to a better place. The writer of Hebrews sheds some light on this when, speaking of Abraham and Sarah, he tells us, “They admitted that they were aliens and strangers on earth. . . . If they had been thinking of the country they had left, they would have had opportunity to return. Instead, they were longing for a better country—a heavenly one. Therefore God is not ashamed to be called their God, for he has prepared a city for them” (Hebrews 11:13-16).

Remember that you are “aliens and strangers.” You’re on a journey, and you don’t belong here in the first place. And remember where you are headed—to a better place. Don’t let the potholes damage your resolve!

Aaron and I know that God has placed this discontentment in our lives, especially in the last few months. We believe this is specifically there to cause us to get out of our comfort zone, move across the world and spread the Gospel to all the nations. And at the end of the day the most important aspect of Christianity is to bring Glory to God.

Even though I have always viewed discontentedness as a bad thing, I now see it as a blessing to drive us away from our own sinful nature and closer to becoming more and more Christ-like in our walk with Him.

He had me hold the iPod while it played a slideshow of videos and pictures of us from when we first started dating. The slideshow was played with sweet lovey music and at the end it said “Turn Me Over”. When I turned the iPod over, I was amazed to see the engraving of “Will You Marry Me?”  Aaron got down on his knee and said “Will You Marry Me, Nichole?”  I don’t remember much after that but it was one of the happiest and sweetest memories.

Video of our Engagment

The “New” Wedding Band

Because of where we are wanting to serve in Africa, I decided that it would be best to leave my engagement ring here with a family member.

Aaron surprised me at 5am a couple of days ago with a black velvet box. I had to rub the sleepers out of my eyes to take a good look at it. Inside was a beautiful antique silver band.  It was very simple yet absolutely gorgeous. I took off my engagement ring and wedding band to put on this “new” ring. I was so excited but overwhelmed with sadness and started to cry.

Though it was beautiful, I realized that it was not my favorite ring. Memories of when Aaron and I got engaged flooded in, and I felt the sting from letting go of my most prized earthly possession.

Lesson from God

What I learned from this whole experience is that God is stripping me of material things. I realize it’s ok to have sentimental emotions and memories of certain material things, but God is showing me much more beyond that. He is teaching me to find value and worth in Him and in Him alone. We have been getting rid of almost everything we own and I realized that this was the last material thing that I have been holding on to. I pray that God’s glory will be shown through the Gospel and not because of the things of this world.

As I was listening to these words from Natalie Grant’s new song “I will not be moved”, I felt even more affirmed that the Lord is my rock and my protection from all evil. Since my husband and I have decided to move to South Africa, it’s like Satan is continually feeding me lies specifically about being inadequate to share the Gospel with others. I know this is NOT true, simply because as a believer, God calls us to go and spread His name to all the nations. Jesus said in Matthew 28;19 “Therefore, go and make disciples of all the nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father, and the Son, and the Holy Spirit.”

Christ the Solid Rock I Stand

I know I may stumble and may even fall, but at the end of the day, it’s grace that I am standing on. On Christ the solid rock I stand, all other grounds are sinking and I will NOT be moved for anything other than Him.

The Lord is my rock, my fortress, and my savior; my God is my rock, in whom I find protection. He is my shield, the power that saves me, and my place of safety. I called on the Lord, who is worth of praise, and he saved me from my enemies. Psalm 18:2-3