I’m looking forward to filling it with creativity and loveliness!

Here is the link Satori-Now.

I’ve only put a few posts up, Beginners’ Mind, is the first. And I’m simply using wordpress jetpack for my email service. I decided a long time ago that trying to get people on an email list made me feel like I was getting people!  And if I don’t like being got or getting promotional extras in my inbox then why would I collect emails to do that to my readers? (It feels icky to me and it’s not right for me and the type of writing I’m doing.)

Everything you need to know about me, what I’m doing, publishing or selling is on the about page on this new site. (Still working on my sidebar as I write this)

And if I have something extra to say, about new publications or anything else, I’ll  just write about it instead of bombarding your sacred email space with promotional stuff. This makes simple sense to me.

I now read almost all of the blogs I follow on a  feed reader, so, if you feel inclined to subscribe you can always click the RSS-Feed link and save space in your inbox. Reading blogs this way feels more private, more intimate to me.

So please subscribe, but in a way that feels best for you. I’m not tracking you, counting, or peeking to see what links you’ve opened, because I have better things to do, like writing, taking cool photographs, playing with my chickens, playing in the garden…

I would love to hear from you. Let me know what posts or topics you’ve liked best in the past. Or ask me crazy creative questions, they might inspire a post.

Aishiteru!

Nicole Tilde

I’ve been spinning in circles on this decision, but overall I don’t think the writing here offers a good representation of the work I’m currently doing. I’ve been publishing on this site for a long time, since 2010, and it is time to move on. Time for a new look, a new outlook, and more of the writing I really enjoy. In the end, it seemed easier to redesign my web-site by starting over from zero.

I’v been working in the background redesigning all of my online spaces and profiles, and I will soon have a new blog up at Satori-Now.com. You can check that domain in the future or just come here, I will soon have this hosting re-directed to the new site.

I can honestly say that blogging has changed me. It has connected me to many life changing perspectives and life-long friends, and it has forced me to grow. I’ve been encouraged to peel away my pretentions and agendas and to settle into the things that matter most.

My writing is a path to the spirit. It calms me when the world feels unfriendly and chaotic. It brings me back to my great and epic forgetting and finally to my remembering; remembering the one, the white circle, the color that encompasses everything, the place of no boundaries or divisions. I believe this is what we have all forgotten, and what we seek everyday, just a glimpse or a memory of satori, of the unity we already know.

This is the essence of what I hope my writing offers to others – little reminders of what we already know, finding a sense of the familiar in the strange, prose to sing you home, with a little bit of soul retrieval mixed in. Find the memories you forgot to nurture, the present moments you are neglecting to notice, in their essence exists the center-light.

Thank-you for being a reader, an encourager, an instigator, a friend, a mentor… your eyes and your left words and comments have meant everything to me. I hope to see you soon on my new site at Satori~Now.

.

Nicole~

.

~~~

The ducks appear to move effortlessly across the water,
but I know their feet are paddling ferociously beneath the lake.

It’s the face we show the world.
The stories we choose to tell.

The topside of the mirror.
The warm side of the lake.
They leave ribbons in their wake.
A ‘V’ – A cape
A spade -
To cut through the moment.

In Shoshin everything kept beneath the water surfaces.
Everything on the inside wants to be on the outside.

If you’ve spent your whole life hiding your ferociously paddling feet,
it may feel like a death of the whole self,
but it’s simply the story of the ego that wants to die.

You are left with white
and the sound of duck fluff
landing on water.

That’s the sound of no effort.
The sound of no struggling.

Shoshin is the place
between the soft belly of feathers
and the lapping lake.

The secret to Shoshin, beginner’s mind, emptying to begin again,
is found in the sound of duck fluff landing on a still winter lake.

Emptying to begin again and again…

Back to Shoshin again and again…

I wonder if you can squeeze yourself inside the generous silence of this?

Nicole~

‘Finding Shoshin Again’ is an excerpt from the Dream-Speak Journal ~ Shoshin.

~~~

Ladybug

This morning I awoke dreaming of two words, Lucky and Joy.
Lucky was a little red bug with dots and inner wings as soft as silk stockings.
And Joy was a tiny bird dressed up in blue feathers…

Coccinellidae, or more commonly known as; the ladybug, ladybird, lady beetle, ladyclock, lady fly, or lady cow. She is the lucky one with the alarming red wings and spicy black dots.

The word Coccinellidae originated from the Latin word coccineus meaning scarlet. The common name ladybird originated from Britain where the insect came to be known as Our Lady’s bird or the Lady beetle. In early paintings Mary was often depicted wearing a red cloak with the spots of the seven spot ladybird. The spots were said to symbolize the seven joys and seven sorrows. In the United States the name was adapted to ladybug and the German name Marienkäfer translates to Marybeetle. (1) http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Coccinellidae

I chose the laydbug to stand as the totem for the joss of my fame, my icon for the south facing feng shui sun and all things to represent fame and reputation. I mainly chose her because she is known for being lucky, but the south corner turned out to be suitable since she likes warm days. And the best and brightest sun sits in the south!

I can’t think of a better legacy for fame than the legacy of luck, but she also reminds me of awakenings, of warm spring weather and the good divas that twirl around the garden beds.

But later I discovered the ladybug had secrets. Those red and black spotted wings are not her real wings, they are wing covers. Her real wings are the thin black ones underneath.

Ahhh, intrigue! A mystery, a creature with secrets and a story that might tell much more than her red wings will allow.

One day as I was reading the story of Manawee, it all started to make sense. The ladybug is the perfect embodiment of the dual nature of the feminine archetype.

In the story of ‘Manawee’ as told in ‘Women Who Run with the Wolves;’ Clarissa Pinkola Estes, Ph.D., has this to say about the dual nature of women;

“Anyone close to a woman is in fact in the presence of two women; an outer being and an interior criatura, one who lives in the topside world not so easily seeable… Understanding this dual nature in women, sometimes causes men, and even women themselves, to close their eyes and hail heaven for help… These “two-women-who-are-one” are separate but conjoined elements which combine in the psyche in thousands of ways.”

When I read these words, I suddenly felt known, and I precisely understood why I chose this tiny bug, lucky spots and all, to stand in the south corner as the Joss of My Fame.

Her outer wings are the ones she carries to the grocery store; as are mine. These are the wings she wears to work, the wings she wears to social gatherings and parties; as are mine. These are the wings she uses to protect her inner self, her inner black-silken wings!

The story of Manawee is about the quest to get inside the feminine, to find her true face, her inner twin, the flame that lives and dwells within. Manawee is the insightful, yet curious embodiment of the masculine who wants more than anything to know both of her names, to know both names of the beautiful women on the edge of town.

It is a story about integration and the joy of finding and knowing the full self.

~~~

*’Ladybug’ was originally published in the Dream-Speak Journal / Issue Eleven / Lucky.

~~~

I have a fascination with all things in red capes and feathers. Little Red Riding Hood, the Cardinal, the Ladybug and now this ancient depiction of Mary in her red cloak. As though Mary could be the fully awakened counterpart of Little Red Riding Hood. Her seven sorrows proving the transcendence of her journey and proving her worthy of the spiritual integration of the awakened feminine and masculine.

*I have some new creative plans going forward, plans I’m working on in the background, and I can only say that the Ladybug is a big part of this new journey. I can’t wait to share her black wings with you!

Nicole~

_______________________________________________________________________

Issue Eleven of Dream-Speak
is available at HPMagcloud.

Digital copies are $3.95.
Print copies are $10.95.
Print purchases come with a customary digital copy.

See the Dream-Speak web-site
for membership information.

________________________________________________________________________

The subject of the masculine/feminine energies has come up in several conversations lately, so I thought I would share this article here. Little Red Riding Hood as the Red Bird was originally published in Dream-Speak Issue Eight / Satori.

Two bright red cardinals sat on the gate beside me.
One flew away and the other hung back.
He looked right at me and in a clear voice said,

“You are getting closer to what I have to say.”

And one morning I awoke with the rest of the riddle in my head,

“Little Red Riding Hood is the Cardinal.”

Little Red Riding Hood is the young, immature feminine archetype. Too young for the awakening of her better judgment, still finding protection in the mother’s nest, still seeking play in the grandmother’s house.

One might say she is waking to her sexual nature by confronting the wolf. She is reaching the awareness of her senses, the eyes, the teeth, the ability to sense and know things beyond her physical reality, outside of the safety of the mother’s house.

Little Red Riding Hood is the awakening feminine, a representation of growth and maturity.

Red is the core and the color of the base chakra, the flame that sparks ideas and new life. The fire of red will smoke us out, destroy and give new life. It is the Phoenix burned to ash and born again, from red to black and red again, the cycle of life and death and life.

As we reach our awakenings on individual levels we also arrive there collectively. Some of us on horseback, some in bare feet, some are straggling across an illusionary finish line, out of breath, beat down by our own winds. There is no wrong way to arrive. It is the showing up that matters.

The world is changing and traveling at a speed we can barely keep up with. For those who are ready and awake it is most alluring, but for those unprepared and distanced from their own red hoods, it is a scary journey.

A streak of red across the sky,
hearts skipping through the woods,
stripped of the innocence that once existed.

All awakenings and imbalances manifest from our two internal energies; the masculine and the feminine. The feminine always protects and creates – the masculine always expresses and exerts. They need each other.

Collectively we are on the verge of sleep and we are suffering from an imbalance. We don’t understand ourselves, thus we don’t understand each other.

A feminine imbalance presents itself when we don’t give ourselves the privilege of saying NO or just as acutely we say NO to everything. How many times a day do you sacrifice your intuitive self to obligations or put your own wishes aside to appease others?

A masculine imbalance manifests when we don’t allow ourselves to say YES to life, to opportunities or to our dreams, when we cannot express our creative or instinctive promptings. It appears when we shyly suppress our disappointments or opinions out of fear of being disliked or being reprimanded. On the opposite scale a masculine imbalance presents itself when we don’t honor the wishes of others to say NO. Circumstances of rape or molestation are extreme case of this.

Think of the power we hold in learning how and when to use those two words for the good of ourselves and others.

The awakening of sexuality  has nothing to do with gender, it is not merely a physical outgrowth. It is a deeply spiritual growth. Confronting the wolf is an internal awakening. It is a merging of the two primary forces and energies in the universe.

The wolf is a messenger of our primal instincts. The internal voice urging us to protect yet express what is inside the basket. There is always risk involved when we expose ourselves, our secrets and our feminine space. The balance is about honor and finding our own boundaries of safety and heart centered action. As well as learning to honor the boundaries of others.

The awakening is about learning to say NO so we can finally say YES.
~

Of course, Little Red Riding Hood is the Cardinal!
~

I have been followed by Cardinals all my life. They are the squeaky hinge of the opening gate, the awakening of passion, of sexuality, of creativity, of the spirit.

When I see the bright red Cardinals hanging on the fence I don’t merely see a male presence. I see both – the feminine and masculine together. They have always appeared as a union of spirits to me.

As a society we confuse gender roles with our roles of the spirit. But if we watch the birds, what we perceive as a female trait of color and plumage is often given to the male. The male bird expresses and the female protects.

I don’t know what word the Cardinal holds in Indian myths or in the texts of animal totem work. To me the Red Bird says, “Awake!” as he stirs me from my sleep.

In my dreams I am the girl in the red hood. In my waking life I am the streaking red bird I feed every day, and I am coming closer to what it is he has to say.

Nicole~

_______________________________________________
This article was originally published on October 10, 2012
in Dream-Speak/Issue Eight/Satori. Digital copies are
available for $3.95 – by clicking the hp link below.
~

_______________________________________________

My Animal Guides are part of my personal Dream-Speak. They belong to the collective I meet at the table of my dreams and if I am honest and open they tell me things directly and answer my questions.

Most often, the integration of their messages into my Dream-Speak is not found in resource books or even by scouring the web. It is found by asking direct questions, “What do you want?” Or “What have you come to teach me?”

Clarity is key. Animals don’t understand our wobbling. They don’t understand the inability we have to make decisions quickly and swiftly. They don’t understand why we have lost our instincts. Our Animal Guides want directness and questions that cut through the mist. And in turn, they are direct with us.

“What do you want, Crow?”

Crow is one of my personal guides. His answer came to me one Sunday morning as I was resting in that sweet spot between awake and sleep. On this Sunday, the word labor rolled through my head and then the  words, “Stop struggling and just write girl – just write!”

Where I live, in the Southern Bible-Belt, Sunday is the day to stop laboring. It is the day all the shops shut down. The seventh day was the day God finished his work and rested. He looked around and said, “Oh My – Isn’t It Good!” Growing up in the south you are hard pressed to even find a shoe store open on Sunday. When I ran my garden center I thought it would be great to open on Sunday because gardening seemed like a relaxing hobby. It wasn’t work or labor, but an enjoyable pasttime. (errr…nobody came) But these are the traditions deeply embedded in our society, and that, is just the way it is.

To labor actually means to struggle to bring something forth. But what is this thing, this idea, this work that we are to stop laboring with? Stop toiling over? What are we fighting against? What are we supposed to be resting from? What is the work? But most importantly, what is the struggle?

Since the day I heard Crow’s answer roll through my head I’ve made Sunday my official day of the Crow. It is not the day I stop working, but the day I stop laboring, the day I stop struggling with my work. It is not a day I sit on my laurels. It is the day I accept what is and what can’t be changed. Crow-day is the day I find joy in my work again. I try to look around or back or up and say, “Isn’t it good!”

If I am struggling with my writing, on Crow-Day, I want to know why. I want to get back to the place where it feels right and restful. And that is why Crow’s word is law to me. He tells me to simply accept what is.

“Stop toiling and laboring,” Crow says, “And just look. Look at where you’ve been. Look at all the work you’ve done.”

Crow has been one of my closest guides since that day as he blankets me with protection.

I love the way the Crows chase the Hawks away from our property, the way they talk back and forth and hover over the Chickens. In turn, the Chickens, and especially the Roosters, listen when the Crows speak. I believe the Roosters hear the Crows calling, ‘Hawk-Hawk’ before they even hear the Hawk’s steady shrill. They listen because Crow’s word is law. (And you thought they were saying Caw-Caw?)

I don’t believe totems are one answer fits all. You can get help from books, but in the end the answers will come from your own experience with an animal. For me, the word law for Crow came from the Medicine Cards book, but the description did not connect with me until I heard that word, labor, in my head. And then everything clicked! It all made sense!

There was a shift in my writing after this day. A new perspective on the work I was doing.

Below is a short list of my personal Animal Guides and some of the things I’ve learned from them. Some of these revelations came to me with the help of books, some of them through dreams, but all of them came to me through taking the time to query and ask the most direct and simple questions, “What do you want? What have you come to teach me?”

When you ask a direct question your mind goes to work on the answer.

~~~

Armadillo – Boundaries and honoring and accepting my self imposed limitations.

Bluebird – Finding joy in my work and in all things.

Cardinal (redbird) – The awakening feminine, the creative awakening. The counterpart to Little Red Riding Hood.

Cat (domestic) – Domestic animals have deep lessons and many stories to offer. All of my cats represent different things to me, but generally they represent the vulnerabilities I try to protect. My cat Tavi, represents the Beautiful Crone. She is wise and witchy! Yet so zen and unwavering in her self confidence. I gotta’ be more like her.

Crow – Accepting what is. A shape-shifter because his word of law exists in all things. Giving up the struggle.

Cedar Waxwing – Gratitude. Learning to give and also learning to accept the gift of receiving.

Bat – Rebirth, a guide through the deeper levels of the spirit and sleep. Transcending and moving through the phases of emotion.

Bear – Presence! How am I approaching others? Am I being defensive? Am I taking things personally? Bear also has another side. A side that is a fierce mother and protector, a side of introspection and she is a master of sleep. Bear has very contrasting dark and light sides. She can mean many things so I always have to listen and watch my feet.

Dog (domestic) – Again domestic animals tell us different stories. But the dog can represent instincts, the freedom of play, the wild creative or even loyalty to a job or a calling. My dog, Mackenzie has taught me many things, but mostly she teaches me about my beliefs about protection and freedom.

Hen – Finding the mystical in the everyday. The lightnesss of feathers and moonlight.

Horse – A transporter of passion and conviction. Steadiness. Of all the animals, the Horse knows most of all when I am not being truthful or when I am being wishy-washy. I can’t hide anything from those big watery eyes.

Ladybug – A totem for luck, fame and the dual nature of the feminine. What I show and what I really believe.

Owl – Smart and Wise. (ahhh, I’ve a lot to learn from my owl) To have Owl as a guide is a high honor. I must admit I am smart and wise and maybe wise beyond my years, but I also must know what to do with my smarts. Owl visits those who are too smart for their own good. Owl visits those who need guidance, but are too stubborn to ask. Owl guides those who don’t know what to do with their smarts. Owl sees truth through lies, but it is up to me to know what to do with this truth.

Rat or Mouse – Focusing too much on the little things, navel gazing, existential angst.

Rooster – Finding the masculine voice. Speaking out for what is mine, for what is my truth. The calling of integration and poetry.

Snake – Wisdom through change and transmutation. Introspection and a need for isolation. Oddly enough, the snake is my counterpart to the Nun archetype. Snake is hard to get to know, seems cold, but makes all of her decisions based on a stern dedication to a path and to conviction. Driven by ideals and the spiritual life.

Squirrel – Prepare! But don’t prepare for doom. Prepare for the good things, for the now, for the winter cabin of my dreams. Do your homework! Do your research! But find the balance in this. Sounds funny, but squirrel visits me in the bathroom, the room of preparation.

Turkey – Selfless giving and sacrifice. What do I need to share more of? What am I holding back?

Turtle – The earth. Wisdom found in nature and self sufficiency. Don’t rush. What’s the hurry? Everything is here – now.

Vulture / Buzzard - Opportunity. Take advantage of the resources at hand.

Wren – The happy industrious work of making a home.

~~~

Again, this is a short list and I’m sure I’ve left many animals off. (I think they will forgive me for that)

When I get a message or learn something wonderful from an animal guide I call this integration. The integration is the calling of an animal onto my ark; the great raft that carries me across the waters of the collective.

Above all, it is the  basic instinct of every animal to survive, and as we integrate their meaning into our lives, they teach us great things about our own survival. They teach us how to move easily through our changes and through our present situations.

I would love to hear about your animal stories.

What have you learned from a Butterfly, from a Hummingbird? From a Lion? From the Bear?!

Nicole~

_________________________________________________________________

The latest issue of Dream-Speak is available
in print or digital format at HpMagCloud.

Digital Subscriptions are available on the Dream-Speak site.

Dream-Speak is a monthly journal focused on the topic
of dreams, myth, totems, poetry and the everyday mystical.

__________________________________________________________________

~~~
Let’s Go!
Let’s Jump!
Let’s Fly!

We’ll join a band of migrating gypsies
As they squeak and squeal
And swing from limb to limb
As they pull their black ribbon
Through the wind ~

In Medias Res!

We are not at the end
We are not at the beginning
We are in the middle of things
And this is where our best stories begin!

Happy Solstice Season!

Happy Flying!

Tell bold and new stories this coming year -
Or simply find the goodness inside the old ones!

May your holiday and new year be filled with
dreams, stories, myths and legends!

Nicole~
.

My lineage is Selene, Goddess of the Moon
Her daughter, Ersa, Goddess of the Dew
I was gathered in the earthy feathers
Of a Red Winged Blackbird
Stitched – given spoonfuls of moonlight
And my life became round
Like the crest of the earth
Uncertain and rolling
Unclear of what I had found

And at the age of thirty nine
The voice of a cackling Crow
Sang shrilling songs in my window

“I want that voice!” I cried to his wings

“I can’t give it to you,” Crow says
Dropping like ash

He lifts again
Stares at me from bare limbs
I hear his silence
His words carry on the wind
I hear Selene and Ersa
I see the burning tips of red wings
I see flashes of my lineage offered like gifts

In this town there are seers on every corner
There is a cure for everything
Even for the troubles I didn’t know I had
They hold vigils of ringing bells and candlelight
Promising to cast spells upon my regrets

Awake at 2:30 AM
Writing loudly and wild at my desk
My red shoes dancing beneath my feet
Burning me – healing me

A plea to my creative -
I shall not be tempted by your promises and spells
By the carriage that tempts to drive me from this hard path

“Step in,” says the seer
“Leave your burden, your burning shoes…”

But I don’t think she can handle my words
My flame is brighter than hers

“But I promise – when you leave – you will have clarity…”

Small flames are easily snuffed
And a day in this town
Tempts to make me
A broken shell of who I am
I need a brain, some courage, the heart to move on
The right shoes to carry me home

“Just Write Girl! Stop Struggling and Just Write!”
Crow says this to me over and over again -

My red shoes – they burn everything!
Alone at 2:30 AM
With this voice
Born from the moon – wrapped in dew
A voice that won’t leave me

Crow speaks again,
“I can’t give you what you already have.”

I float like ash

Nicole~

If you like the words please share them!
~I am a writer, a poet and a dreamer. I have a dream sharing group on Facebook.  It’s a fun space where we share our night dreams and the little bits of our collective. Please friend me and then message me if you would like to join. I write and post here on occasion and mostly everyday on my other blog (sometimes I take days off with no apologies). Every month I wrap up what I’ve said in a journal called, Dream-Speak. I also like to feature the works of other creative dreamers in the journals. The digital journals are available for $3.95 each.

Moose!

In the medicine cards Moose’s word is Self-Esteem.

I see power in the Moose
Calming breath casting shape
Onto the things I don’t always want to see
He is forceful, yet gentle enough to be considered one of the Deer

I love this line from the Medicine Cards,
“This ‘tell the world’ trait contains a joyfulness which only comes with a sense of accomplishment.”

Harmonious-Pride is another phrase used for his medicine.

So, what am I stomping my feet about?

What am I breathing and bellowing into the air?

I just completed a 50 page issue of Dream-Speak!

This issue is called Arribada and it is near and dear to my heart as it contains all of the poetry published on my blog when it was running as, ‘Writing As Loud As I Can.’

Many of you followed my posts when I was publishing poetry every Friday.
Many of your cheered me on and gave me such wonderful feedback and comments.
Thank-You so much for that support!

Here are all of those poems in one collection!
.

Dream-Speak Issue 10 / Arribada

By Nicole~ Rushin

52 pages, published 12/10/2012

Dream-Speak is a Monthly Journal of Dreams, Poetry and Creativity.

Yesterday you were so sure of yourself and your path and today you feel flat! What’s up with that?!

You were so sure of those few things – those things you knew to be true.

They were there yesterday. Where did they go?

So, like a detective you go out looking for your poetry.

Ahhh, but logic is the great killer of creativity. The detective finds clues, he searches for proof. But poetry is not solid. It is not the grass – it is the wind inside the grass – it whispers from the inside. And where is the proof in that? 

The proof is that you have felt it and laughed. That you have been, at least once, brushed by the soft tail of your soul.

What you really want is to find the truths that will stick. An idea or a mission to run with and feel good about forever!

Those truths that feel like a belly laugh! The truths that makes you feel alive!

~~~

For a long time I lived with the fear that my creativity would wander away and vanish, the fear that it would not stick. I feared that my bad days, my blank days, would become all my days. They would swallow me in uncertainty and I would never be able to write again!

But the bad and blank days always precede the fear and uncertainty. And my solace came in being okay with the presence of the blankness and it came in being able to release the fear I attached to it. Have you ever noticed that when you are fearful or dreadful you want to hold on to the mood like it is your burden to bear. Why is it so hard to just release it?

~~~

One evening Reed and I were riding to a yoga class and I knew I needed to start working on an article. I had nothing! No ideas! My old friend, Blankness, was visiting. The problem is, Blankness always wants to invite fear to her party! Fear wanted to step in. I was riding shotgun so I just closed my eyes and went with it.

I asked the feeling, “What do you want? What does this fear want from me?”

And she answered, “I want you to let go of me.”

What a strange experience. What a bold but simple answer!

I had never thought of it this way before, but maybe one of the reasons fear is in our lives is simply to teach us how to let go.

It was as though there was a face and a voice so I asked, “What is your name?”

“Gabrielle,” she said.

I heard all of this as plain as day in the span of what seemed like a few seconds.

There was no logic in it. I didn’t try to analyze it or seek out any other answers. I didn’t try to be a detective. I just opened my eyes and thought ‘Okay - I’ll give it over - I’ll let it go.’

~~~

We watched a video the other night about faith. The point of the talk was that when it comes to faith, belief, and creativity, at some point your logical mind has to step out of the way and you have to step into the belief that you will be taken care of, that you are in the right place at the right time – always. There is no logic to faith. There is no logic to creativity. And there is great fear in the process of releasing logic.

~~~

I do believe we have guides. Maybe you feel better calling them angels. But they are all around us. They send us ‘shimmerings’ and little ‘noticings.’ They want us to listen, and if we ask, they will take our fear when it is too hard to bear. They will take our uncertainty and offer us blank days and moments as opportunities for quiet.

Live + Notice + Share

We cannot forget to live and notice first.

Personally, I had to learn to trust in the waxing and waning process of my creativity. I had to be okay with that. Exactly as it was said in the video; trust, have faith. This is what I got that day in the car as I handed my fear over to Gabrielle.

~~~

So what about these sure things? What about that aliveness that feels like a belly laugh?

When was the last time you laughed so hard the muscles on your face were sore?

When my grandmother passed three months ago all I could hear in my head was her laugh. Over and over again. I could hear her laughing. When we were little we would hide from her and jump out so we could hear her scream and laugh! (we never really scared her – she played along because she liked to hear us laugh) As she got older, I think she forgot how to laugh. Hearing her laughter was a reminder to me that she had found it again. A reminder that this uniquely human trait might be the one thing that matters in life. It might be our only sure path because laughing is the quickest way to hand over our fear.

What are the things in life that make you smile and laugh?

Find them. Remember them – these are your truths!

~~~

I know this much is true:

I am for the wild woman archetype, the everyday mystic, being bare-foot and talking to crows.

I am for afternoon sunlight and long conversations over hot coffee or tea.

I am for slowing down and letting life pour over me.

I am for waking up slow, listening, letting the voice of my spirit guide me.

I am a sucker for old 70′s and 80′s music, daydreaming, astral traveling.

I talk to my dogs, I hug my cats, I love to feed my chickens and sit in the cool grass.

I am for nature and shimmering leaves. I am for spring, long hot summers and naps on the porch swing.

My favorite thing about winter? Riding shotgun and staring out the window as the sun skips through the paper-bag leaves.

I don’t believe we find ourselves by traveling around, although it never hurts. I am a home body – I like my pillows, my books, my routines. Wanderlust, yes, I get that sometimes, it is cured easily, by being away from my dog for a week. I start to miss her smile, her ears, her soggy toys.

There is poetry to be found in the comforts of home, there are stories in everything around me, in their object lessons -

A tea kettle that has lost its whistle
Feathers and shells
Cards I pulled for yesterday
Books and notebooks
Journals and dreams
Gifts I’ve received
Their Poetry!
And when I say poetry
I don’t mean lines broken on a page
I mean essence
I mean the spinning down
Because when I find my poetry
I find my silence
I find the stillness
I find the essence
The everyday mystic
The lightness of feathers
And moonlight…

The title of this post, I Know This Much Is True, was inspired by an old 80′s song by Spandau Ballet (the ultimate cheesy 80′s song and bad hair band!) I heard this song as I was riding shotgun one day – watching the sun skip through the leaves – and it made me wonder what I knew to be true.

.

.

I wonder if you believe in angels and guides? I couldn’t possibly be the only one to hear voices and see shimmerings.

I know one thing – if you believe – you can hand over your fear.

I know this much is true.

Nicole~

…

Nicole~ is a writer, a poet, a dreamer and the publisher of Dream-Speak, a monthly journal for Creatives and Dreamers. Dream-Speak now has its own website, you can find out more at the Dream-Speak site.

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