no hyperbole allowed

Review: Game of Thrones (Season 4, Episode 2 - "The Lion and the Rose")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Wed, 16 Apr 2014 02:36:00 +0000

by richmin3000

"killing a man at a wedding? horrid. what sort of monster would do such a thing?" - Lady Olenna

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

read my review of season 4, episode 1 ("two swords") - here

this episode, we spent a majority of our time in king's landing, especially during the second half. our time there mostly served to set up some new dynamics moving forward, including jaime's attempt to use his left hand, tyrion's extremely harsh rejection of shae, prince oberyn's veiled threats against tywin/cersei, a brief discussion between lady olenna and tywin about debt, and the eagerly awaited death of the beloved king, escape of sansa and subsequent arrest of tyrion.

we also caught up with stannis/melisandre on dragonstone burning some people (including the queen's own brother) for believing in the 'seven' (gods that is). we got a little backstory, including melisandre's poor upbringing and spent some time with shireen, stannis' daughter.

bran got warned about warging too much. my mom used to tell me if i ate too much chicken, i'd become a chicken. i think it works something like that. bran is now getting visions beneath the weirwood tree of dragons in king's landing and other freaky shit.

the most interesting (and yes, i am the only one who seems interested in this) storyline happened at the dreadfort (a new location this year), the seat of house bolton. we get more evidence of ramsay snow's brutality as he hunts down a poor village girl for sport. but for a house that's sigil is the flayed man and is headed by a man who just killed robb stark at a wedding, roose bolton certainly shows a lot of disdain for ramsay's treatment of theon (aka reek). roose's plan becomes all the more clear in this episode as he tells ramsay that they must take back the north from the greyjoys in order to stake his claim as the new warden of the north.

GAME OF THRONES POWER RANKINGS:
1. tywin lannister (last week, 1) - the war of the five kings may be over, but now his own grandson is the 3rd king to die. maybe joffrey's death should affect his standing, until we consider who is next in line to take the throne.
2. daenerys targaryen (last week, 3) - we didn't catch up with her this week, but after joffrey's death, dany's relative strength can only grow. it's like having a bye week in football and still moving up the standings when everyone else loses.
3. melisandre (last week, 5) - as i wrote last week referencing a scene last year when she burned three leeches representing the 3 false kings (renly was already dead). robb stark, dead. joffrey, dead. i forget who the other leech was for, but i'm sure whoever it is will be fine.
4. bran stark (last year, 9) - the theme here is that it's good to have special gifts... like being able to go into the mind of a direwolf (or birth dragons or demon babies) and seeing into the future. remember that bran (and rickon) dreamed of his father's death and now more visions.
5. tommen baratheon (last week, NR)- it's good to be next in line to be the king. this is just speculation but if ned stark and stannis taught us anything, it's that without any legitimate sons, the oldest brother is next in line to take the throne. plus there's a new actor playing tommen this year.
6. roose bolton (last week, 7) - he will be the warden of the north if he can take it from the greyjoys.
7. oberyn "red viper" martell (last week, hon. mention) - if you can stand face-to-face with tywin spewing not-so-veiled threats then you belong on this list. oberyn pretty much told cersei that her daughter myrcella is a hostage in dorne so yea, he's got some leverage here.
8. margaery tyrell/lady olenna (last week, 4) - well, margaery was ranked #4 last week, but that was before her bread ticket died (for the 2nd time!!). now, we don't know where things stand for her. but with lady olenna at her side, i doubt she'll fall too far.
9. mance rayder (last week, 6) - king beyond the wall. with all these kings dying off, he better be careful.
10. petyr baelish (last week - 10) - where is this new lord of the vale? i doubt we've heard the last of him.

off the list:

joffrey baratheon (previously ranked #2) - how we'll miss your smug, arrogant face. click here to see his bitchiest moments
sam tarwell (#10)

random notes:

so who killed joffrey? so many theories.

here's what we know. joffrey's a prick. he ate some dry cake with doves (dead?) inside, drank some bad wine and chocked to death. his facial color and blood would indicate some poisoning, which we've been told is a method used by women and eunuchs. the only eunuchs we know about in king's landing is varys. there are a lot of women though.
motive? prince oberyn hates the lannisters but is this his style? sansa too. hell, most everyone there hates joffrey and/or the lannisters. maybe there's a motive we haven't considered just yet or one that lies beneath the surface if we dig deeper. who benefits from joffrey's death? his brother? cersei? tywin? margaery? stannis?
here's what else we know. dontos obviously knew about the crime since he was so quick to get sansa out of there as soon as the deed was done.
there are clues abundant if you watch closely enough and pay attention to the "next on" sequence.

tyrion and jaime have always had a close relationship. i wonder how that will be affected with recent events especially in light of jaime's relationship (or lack thereof) with cersei.
does brienne love jaime? i think she just loves the man he could be.
this is at least the 2nd time the iron bank has been mentioned on the show. i think the first was when tyrion was appointed the master of coin and he realized how in debt the kingdom was. now tywin is saying he's not worried about the iron bank.

no hyperbole allowed rating: A

as much as this episode was about joffrey's death, it was equally about the interactions between a lot of the various cast members at the wedding event of the season! cersei and brienne; tywin and oberyn; olenna and sansa. now that most of the characters are making their way home (except those starks), we are being rewarded with a lot of interactions we haven't had in awhile. even jon and sam are back at castle black together. stannis and family are hanging at dragonstone. bolton, new wife and bastard son are at the dreadfort. and the entire lannister family is celebrating in one place.

i appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts for next season. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

Review: Game of Thrones (Season 4, Episode 1 - "Two Swords")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Mon, 07 Apr 2014 16:38:00 +0000

by richmin3000

"i grew up in king's landing." - maester aemon (targaryen)

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of season 3, episodes 6-10 - here

as i stated last year, i changed the format of these recap/reviews to make it easier for me to keep up with the writing and perhaps easier for everyone to follow. last year we went through the different houses, but this year we will go with power rankings.

GAME OF THRONES POWER RANKINGS:
1. tywin lannister (last year, 1) - the war of the five kings is over and tywin celebrates by melting down ned stark's old sword, "ice" into two swords (hence the title of the episode!), one as a gift for his newly returned son, jaime.
2. joffrey baratheon (last year, 4)- it's good to be the king. joffrey seems quite content after the failures of stannis and robb to take his throne. he has no problem talking shit to his uncle/father/captain of his kingsguard as he prepares for his upcoming nuptials to margaery tyrell.
3. daenerys targaryen (last year, 2) - went from almost dying in the desert to messiah for all the slaves in essos (lands across the narrow sea)... plus bigger dragons!! maybe her dragons being too big for her britches takes her down a notch. plus, she still seems far away from the action in king's landing.
4. margaery tyrell (last year, 3) - went from a sexless marriage to being the influential wife-to-be of an actual king... she wants to be the queen. lady olenna, margaery's grandmother, certainly deserves a nod here as well.
5. melisandre (last year, 5) - like margaery above, she's got the ear of a king and knows how to use what her mother gave to her.. like a lady. plus she burned three leeches and robb stark, the usurper, died. i forget who the other two leeches were for, but i'm sure it wasn't important.
6. mance rayder (last year, 8) - king beyond the wall.. he has an enormous army that really wants to get south. we didn't see him this episode, but we did meet the thenns, a clan of wildling warriors, who the other wildlings are even afraid of.
7. roose bolton (last year, 6) - went from extra on the set to warden of the north and all he had to do was backstab his king and let loose his crazy bastard son.
8. bran stark (last year, 7) - i know i know, there's no way a stark can be on this list, let alone a stark who can't walk. but let's be real.. dany has dragons, melisandre has demon babies, but bran not only has a direwolf but is able to mind control it along with a man-giant whose only verbal ability is to say 'hodor' in comical fashion. this kid is legit.
9. petyr baelish - went from lord of harrenhall (which never really materialized) to lord of the vale.
10. sam tarwell - he's the first person to kill a whitewalker in a thousand years.

honorable mention:

arya stark (last year, n/a) - she's really into the slow kill. i certainly wouldn't want to get on her list. she's a little too small to crack this list, especially in the grasp of the hound, but her dedication to revenge makes us take note.
oberyn "red viper" martell (last year, n/a) - there's a lot of talk about paying debts and i don't think he's referring to last month's beer tab. he has a thing for lannisters, especially after his sister, nieces and nephews were murdered by the lannisters (the mountain) after robert baratheon's rebellion. remember that the mad king's son, rhaegar, was married to elia martell, before running off with lyanna stark (ned's sister and robert's wife-to-be), which started robert's rebellion and led to the mad king killing ned's older brother and father.
yara greyjoy (last year, n/a) - we left off with her setting sail with 50 ships to go save her brother.

off the list: lord commander mormont; robb stark; catelyn stark; theon greyjoy; jamie lannister (sans right hand) and the rest of the lannister children whilst tywin is in charge

random notes:

tyrion seems to be hating life right now, stuck between duty, honor and desires. he's the master of coin, for sure, but his father, nephew, sister, wife and the martells couldn't show him any less respect.
brienne still seems to be keen on her mission to protect the stark girls, and avenge renley's death. how is she not in jail right now?
myrcella lannister is in dorne in case you don't recall her leaving on a boat way back in season 2. it was for her protection during the expected violence in king's landing.
sansa stark got a pretty necklace from former knight, sir dontos, the same fella she saved in season 2, episode 1, after telling joffrey that it was bad luck to kill someone on your name day.
jon snow is lucky to be alive, but his fate, along with the rest of the night's watch, seems highly at risk. recall that sitting at the night's watch table in judgment of jon is the former city commander, janos slynt, who was sent to the wall by tyrion lannister in season 2.

no hyperbole allowed rating: A-

i appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts for next season. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 3)

- so much to look forward to this year.
- howland reed? i've read some theories about him. they sound promising
- joffre...cough cough cough
- oberyn makes such a big entrance, alas, his quest for vengeance is short lived.
- moon door!
- coldhands!
- stoneheart!

Recap: Game of Thrones (Season 3)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Sun, 06 Apr 2014 22:27:00 +0000

by richmin3000

as we embark on a new season of game of thrones, it's probably a good idea to spend a few (25)minutes recapping what happened in season 3 just in case you forgot where arya, tyrion, cersei, jon, dany and the rest were at the end of last season.

don't forget that i'll be reviewing every episode this year using our new power rankings format!

My Facebook Pet Peeves

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Thu, 20 Mar 2014 04:37:00 +0000

by James Maloney

A few months ago, one of my friends shared an article from the Huffington Post entitled, “7 Ways To Be Insufferable on Facebook.” In short, the article was tremendous, contained hilarious examples and I could not agree more with the overall theme of it. It states that good Facebook posts do something for the reader, while annoying Facebook posts are self-serving to the author. While I have some friends who post stuff that is humorous and deserving of being posted, the vast majority of what people post is material that is self-serving and makes them come across as arrogant or trying create a particular image of themselves. It says something when I run into somebody (in person) that I have not seen in years and when a name of a mutual acquaintance comes up we both roll our eyes and laugh about the narcissistic nonsense that said acquaintance bombards everyone with on Facebook.

The Huffington Post article finally gave me the motivation to publish and expand on a list of eight pet peeves that I have regarding Facebook usage. I made this list back in May 2013 when talking to the wife of one of my best friends. We share a group of friends and immediately agreed on each item in the list and laughed non-stop when we came up with examples of people we know displaying these agonizing practices. About a month later, I had another friend from a completely different circle try to guess the list of eight items I had come up with and within fifteen minutes had guessed at least seven of them. This serves to show that these practices are pretty much universal on Facebook. And of course we then proceeded to roll our eyes and laugh at our mutual acquaintances who display these on a regular basis.

So without further delay, here is a list of eight pieces of wisdom (in no particular order) I’d like everyone to consider before they make their next post on Facebook:

1. Under absolutely no circumstances does anybody give a shit about your Crossfit workout. I am amused to no end by people who post videos, pictures or even descriptions about their Crossfit workouts, or any workout in general. But let’s be honest, the insufferable Crossfitters are the absolute worst. What is the purpose? Oh, I get it. You’re trying to craft the image that you are in great shape, have a great body and are now a stud athlete. The funny thing is, nobody whom I played high school or college sports with that was a good athlete is posting stuff about their workouts. It’s usually the people that were never any good at sports or just watched from the sidelines. Athletes work out because it is something they do more or less every day to stay in shape and perform on the field. They don’t talk about their workouts because it is no big deal. As one of my friends once posted, quoting Kenny Powers in response to the Crossfit Nazis: “No thanks. I play real sports, I’m not trying to be the best at working out.” But I’m not trying to throw the fact that I play real sports in somebody’s face, after all I’m not the one posting videos of myself. However, the fact that people do post pictures or videos of themselves doing Crossfit most likely shows they are insecure and trying to create a newfound image because they have recently stumbled onto this new phenomenon of exercising, probably after having been fat and lazy most of their lives. For the silent majority of people who work out, we don’t talk about it on forums such as Facebook because it is not a big deal and something we’ve done for years. But keep the videos and pictures coming. I’m thrilled by the fact that you are thrilled you can now do a pullup or lift a marginal amount of weight. I am proud of you, too. Those of us that have been working out for years can probably lift more weight than you and outperform you in 99% of physical activities. We just realize that nobody cares and don’t bombard people with information they don’t give a shit about.

2. Nobody wants to hear about how good you are at your job or how important you are because of your job. Again, what is the purpose? You’re arrogant enough to think that several hundred people really want to hear about why you’re the shit because you work in sales and you sold more pieces of gum than your co-worker? It goes back to the image crafting thing again. “I need to tell everyone about this to show them I’m successful.” It goes without saying that you’re also insecure because you have to have to tell everyone how good you are. If you’re really good at your job, somebody else will recognize you for it and others will hear about it. Those who talk up themselves, you’re insecure at best, arrogant at worst. Either way, everyone else has enough to worry about at their own job to care about how many erasers you sold today. By the nature of the job I have I end up seeing and being involved with some pretty notable things that are newsworthy, but the next time I brag about something that happened at work on Facebook will be the first. And you know what I like to do when I’m not working? Not talk about work. If somebody does it’s the sign of a boring person.

3. There’s no need to provide real time commentary or updates on sporting events. When you’re doing this, it is not to inform the public what is happening in a game. It is a self-serving move to prove to everybody that you are a huge sports fan and you have so much knowledge of the sport that you are doing everybody a service by sharing your opinion and insight. But in actuality this is not the case. Nobody cares about your opinion enough that we need 20 status updates regarding what is happening in the Bruins or Patriots game. You know what? If I cared enough about the game, I’d probably be watching it or listening on the radio. Even if I am shut out from those two options, I’ll follow the game on ESPN gamecast. If you want real-time updates, you can read the blogs of professional reporters that are paid by major newspapers to be at the game and give updates and share inside information from their sources. The thing that makes this even better is the people who tend to do this never actually played the sport on which they feel the need to provide commentary, or if they did they definitely never played it at a high level. A lot of the times some of the stuff they say is incredibly foolish and laughable. Several of my friends played sports at the collegiate level and a few played professionally and none of these people feel the need to force feed their opinion or game updates to their friends. The people that do are just trying to create an image and are again being self-serving. You are not providing information that anybody actually cares about. How about watching the game and getting off your phone? “My team just scored! Better tell all my Facebook friends about it so they know how I serious I am about this team! Hey guys, look at me! I’m watching this game otherwise I wouldn’t have been able to post this within five seconds of them scoring! I’m such a big fan! Look at me!” Anybody that cares about the game is watching it and not reading your Facebook updates.

4. If you write messages on your significant other’s wall and then communicate back and forth for the whole world to see, you should be kicked in the head. Hard. This amuses me to no end. There is no logical explanation on why somebody would do this unless the purpose is that they want everybody else to read what they have written. They are either doing this because they are insecure and want to portray to everyone that they have the perfect relationship or maybe they are trying to piss off an ex-girlfriend or ex-boyfriend. Or maybe they’re just trying to convince themselves that they have the perfect relationship. Anyway you look at it, you’re being self-serving once again and are probably a huge douche. However, instead of getting your desired result, hundreds of people are laughing at you and how stupid you look. Think about it. If you have something to tell somebody you are close to, you could do the following, any of which would be a better and less douchey option that writing it on their Facebook wall:

a) send them a private message on Facebook
b) send them an e-mail
c) send them a text message
d) place a phone call to said person
e) tell them whatever the fuck you need to tell them in person

Those are five options that are more appropriate than posting on Mary’s wall that you miss her so much while you’re at work and you can’t wait five hours to see her later that day. Then make sure you comment back and forth for everyone to see just how much you love each other and insert pet nicknames for effect. In doing so, you have proven to every one of your friends that you are a loser and the world would be better off without you.

5. If you post a status update and then like it, then you probably don’t understand how to use Facebook. Ok, you just took a few minutes out of your life to update the world on whatever very important matter that is taking place in your life such as a trip to the local bar, that great talk you had with a friend that is of no consequence to anybody that is reading your post, or that snack you just ate. If you are taking the time to post something, then of course in you feel that this event is all important. After all, the world revolves around you! There’s no need to go ahead and like your own status, actually it’s pretty stupid. You posted it, so yeah, I guess you’re gonna like what you post. Most people don’t post stuff they think sucks or is insignificant (but everyone else probably does), so it is kind of implied that you like what you have to say. The absolute best thing that can happen is when somebody posts something and likes it and then a day later they are still the only person who liked their own post. I guess your post kinda struck out there, Champ. Better luck next time.

6. Those people who provide multiple status updates a day need to get a life and get over themselves. Number one, I think it is hilarious that people think they have such important news to share that they need to provide multiple updates in one day. Going to lunch here! Great lunch, back in the office! What a terrible meeting! Going home now! Wow, traffic sucks!!! Finally home! Going to the gym!!! Fortunately I can block you from my news feed otherwise I’d probably shoot myself in the face. Again, this hits at the underlying theme of narcissism and the poster’s strong belief in his own self-importance. Why would anybody want me to give them a play-by-play breakdown of my day? They don’t. Get over yourself.

7. People that post photos of their meals should be tortured and/or executed. Nobody gives a shit what you had for breakfast, lunch or dinner. And I really don’t care what beer you are drinking or that questionable drink with an umbrella you just posted. Do you care what I had for dinner tonight? For the record I had chicken. Isn’t that fucking exciting! I better take the time to tell everybody because I know that they are just dying to know. The world revolves around me, I must tell or show everybody this meal I am about to eat. It’s from a fancy restaurant so look how successful I am that I can afford this! No wait, I cooked this myself so look at how great I am at cooking! This picture that I am posting will show everyone what a great life I have and can be self-serving to my interests! Look at me!!!

8. Use of hashtags makes you look like an idiot (most of the time). People that use them presumably fall into one of two categories: 1) people that are serious when they use hashtags or 2) people that are trying to be funny by using hashtags. I will admit that there are a few people that can come up with some fairly creative hashtags and for that reason I have slightly softened my stance on hashtags and dropped this topic on this list of hate. But those of you with the humorous hashtags are a distinct minority. A lot of the time these are pretty stupid and the sign of somebody trying too hard. So if you’re going to use them, make sure it is funny or don’t use one. People that use hashtags in a serious manner in an effort for others to come across their posting on a particular topic are the worst type of people. Again, this is the sign of a self-important douche who is in love with what they have to say and wants to attract others to their opinion and maximize self-exposure. Really? Subjecting all of your friends to a post wasn’t enough? You want to slam your material down the throat of people that don’t even know you too? Very well.

Now by the chance some of my friends have taken the time to ready this list (I am not arrogant enough to assume everyone cares enough about me to read this), I fully expect to be de-friended by all those who are offended. Fire away. In actuality, this list was done in fun as I do not hate anybody that is on my friends list, but think about some of the garbage that you are posting and how it makes you look. Instead of boosting that self-image you are trying to create and project to your friends, it is probably just makes you look foolish. Think about it.

But if you do not de-friend me I look forward to knowing what you have for dinner tomorrow and the video of you doing box jumps at tomorrow’s Crossfit session. My life would not be complete without knowing this vital information and more importantly if we are not “friends” anymore, then now you have one less person to whom you can forcefeed that image you are seeking to create. So don’t de-friend me, you actually kind of want me around. You need me.

Editor's notes: Jim obviously spent a lot of time on this and I have to assume it was cathartic for him to type it all out. I thank him for contributing to the blog. Incidentally, one of my facebook pet peeves is when people complain about what others post on facebook. If you don't like it, just hide it or ignore it! Also, Jim has chicken for dinner every night, so no one is wondering about that. Lastly, liking your own posts is the coolest! Especially when you're hilarious and you know it. #yougogirl

News

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Mon, 30 Sep 2013 22:31:00 +0000

Recent podcast guest, Dan Noffsinger, has been promoted to Director of Baseball Operations for the Miami Marlins. We'd like to think that we helped just a little in his trajectory to super stardom.

http://miami.marlins.mlb.com/news/article/mia/miami-marlins-promote-dan-noffsinger-to-director-of-baseball-operations?ymd=20130930&content_id=62236376&vkey=news_mia

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 24)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Fri, 23 Aug 2013 15:40:00 +0000

Rich and Colin would like to welcome Dan Noffsinger to the No Hyperbole Allowed podcast.

Dan is the Assistant Director of Pro Scouting for the Miami Marlins so we spend the entire episode discussing baseball and other things Colin hates and Rich loves. So if you want to hear Colin bored out of his mind you're going to love this episode.

No time stamps this week since it's all baseball all the time! It's time for Episode 24!!!!

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_24.mp3

****Editor's Note: This podcast was recorded in or around March 2013, during Spring Training so some comments may be a little dated****

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 23)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Fri, 28 Jun 2013 15:09:00 +0000

Rich and Colin are back to talk to you about all their new developments over the last several months. Colin is a Mister and Rich finally overcame his debilitating fear of carpets.

I know you all missed us so much and we thank you for all the fan mail... ahem... so yes, we are back, and no, we won't shush... at least Colin won't anyways... it's No Hyperbole Allowed Episode 23!!!!!!

0:00 - Intro/"Black Skinhead" by Kanye West
0:37 - Classic Rich/Colin banter
6:25 - Kanye West/Yeezus
40:40 - Mad Men Season 6
1:07:50 - Man of Steel (w/special guest Jason Oliveri)
1:38:45 - Outro/"I am a God" by Kanye West

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_23.mp3

Review: Game of Thrones (Season 3, Episodes 6-10)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Fri, 14 Jun 2013 13:00:00 +0000

by richmin3000

"any man who must say, i am king, is no true king" - tywin lannister

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of season 3, episodes 1 and 2, "valar dohaeris" and "dark wings, dark words" - here
read my review of season 3, episode 3, "walk of punishment" - here
read my review of season 3, episode 4, "and now his watch has ended" - here
read my review of season 3, episode 5, "kissed by fire" - here

first, let me apologize to those of you who have felt abandoned by my absence over the last several weeks. i tried as best i could to get to the recaps, but due to a busy travel and work schedule recently, i could not. so, here i am for a lengthy recap of the entire second half of game of thrones season 3.

house lannister of casterly rock
tywin lannister is certainly the winner of this season. he left off last year winning the battle of blackwater bay through his new alliances with the tyrells (former renly's bannermen). besides arranging a marriage between tyrion and the now oldest surviving stark, sansa, he's also forged new alliances with the boltons, freys, and arryns (through littlefinger). he's been able to outwit both tyrion and lady olenna, outconnive cersei and is willing to reign in the rabid dog that is joffrey. at least we now know who he was writing all those letters to during the season (if you still can't guess, it was the boltons, freys and all the other conspirators behind the red wedding).

tyrion had a fairly slow season, especially compared to his utter dominance in season 2 (if i had a power rankings - see below - last year he would certainly be towards the top). this year, tryion has been at odds with his father, his sister, his love shae and his nephew king (who he's threatened at least twice recently). at least he has a loving wife who ador... oh wait. i meant to say, at least he's the master of coin. and now that his brother is back maybe things will get easier for him.

cersei, like tyrion, has been boxed in by her father and her boy king.

i think we can all agree joffrey is pure evil.

"honey, i'm home!" - jamie to cersei. "you didn't by chance sleep with our cousin while i was gone?" "no?" "ok, i don't know why i brought that up. missed you too!" "no no, that's a woman, her name's brienne of tarth... she's a.... 'friend'"

lannisters lost this season.. none (except a very valuable right hand and a couple of younger cousins). lannisters in king's landing safe and sounds... all... well except for myrcella who is in dorne safe and sound (?).

house stark of winterfell
where did it all go wrong for robb and catelyn? was it way back in season 1 when catelyn kidnapped tyrion? was it when robb married talisa instead of his frey wife-to-be? or was it when catelyn freed the kingslayer in exchange for a promise to free her daughters? or maybe it was when robb beheaded lord karstark and lost half his soldiers?

robb had such a great plan in place a few episodes ago... join with the freys to attack an unguarded casterly rock (just like the greyjoys had done to winterfell). his newly lorded uncle even sacrificed his bachelorhood for robb's purpose. and for the young wolf who had never lost a battle, this seemed like a decent position to be in after all the bumps in the road recently.

alas, robb and catelyn's demise only reinforces what everyone should already know... this is not a world that favors any of our usual notions of justice or fairness. this is a world where your actions have consequences and you can't rest on honor, courage or your family name to rescue you in the end. as lord baelish commented, this is a realm that only exists due to aegon the conqueror's domination of the seven kingdoms... where power is power as cersei puts it... where power is an illusion as lord varys states. the bottom line is that your honor, courage, family only takes you as far as everyone is willing to let it as long as it serves their interests as well.

bran seems like he might be the stark's best chance at redemption... and maybe the realm's best chance at defeating the whitewalkers. bran spends the 2nd half of the season honing his skills at warging and making his way to the wall. bran learns how to warg into a real person (hodor!) which apparently no one else in the world is able to do. bran is determined to go beyond the wall in search of the three-eyed raven (for some godforsaken reason) even when he runs into sam and learns that jon is close by.

bran also sends rickon off with osha for his protection. rickon finally gets a few lines so good for him.

sansa just got passed around this year from suitor to suitor. first it was littlefinger who promised to wisk her away to safety. she declined once she learned that she would be betrothed to loras tyrell and move to highgarden. then she was finally promised to tyrion and even once she finally started to get used to that, she found out her brother and mother were murdered. this girl can't catch a break.

arya's life sucks. let's just face facts. sansa has it bad too so don't get me wrong, but she's at least married to a pretty nice guy, gets 3 squares a day and bathes on occasion. arya is hanging with a man named the hound. she was almost reunited with her mother and brother before they, along with a family direwolf, get murdered. her best friend gendry got sold to a witch. all she sees is a world full of cheats and murderers. valar morghulis indeed.

jon and the rest of the wildlings made it over the wall in thrilling fashion of course. but soon after jon snow's double secret agent days (and sexy time with ygritte) were over once he realized he couldn't kill the innocent horse trader. after being saved by the direwolves (does he not know that these are bran's and rickon's direwolves??), jon makes his way back to castle black, but not before getting shot three times by ygritte for being such a lying jerk.

house tully of riverrun
for all of you wondering, the tullys are safe and sound after the red wedding... phew. i know you were all very concerned. edmure had a night to remember, what with all the sex with the pretty new wife (what a relief) and the murders of course. can't forget the murders. but lord frey certainly wasn't going to kill off his daughter's new husband just yet... not while she is the new first lady of riverrun.

and also the blackfish survived. he went to go relieve himself during the red wedding and disappeared during the mayhem. this is the same guy who had no patience for edmure's poor bow and arrow shooting (arrowing?? bow and arrowing?? i don't know how to say that) earlier this year. also, roose bolton seemed none too happy to hear about his escape even though lord frey gave it no mind.

house tyrell of highgarden
lady olenna and margaery wait in the wings during the second half of the season after a strong first half. they may have lost the race to marry sansa stark to one of their own, but i wouldn't count them out just yet.

house bolton of the dreadfort
roose bolton was robb's righthand man. he is the lord of the dreadfort and was the temporary lord of harrenhal. he is now the warden of the north and lord of winterfell (if he wants it and until tyrion's son by sansa is of age). a man of few words, roose certainly is no different than the rest of the lords and wannabes in his search of more and more power.

in episode 6, roose sends jamie lannister back to king's landing so long as jamie promises to tell his father that roose played no part in jamie's lost hand... this should have been a strong signal about his allegiances even then.

the bolton's sigil is the flayed man and if you are wondering what a flayed man is, ask theon because that's what they were doing to him all season. now you may ask yourself what sort of family has a flayed man as their sigil but that would be a silly question after bearing witness to the actions of house bolton this season.

ramsay snow is roose's bastard son. you may remember that at the end of last season, roose offered king robb the services of his bastard son to help recapture winterfell (from theon). you may also remember that theon's own men turned him over in order to save their own skins. well, finally in this season finale, lord bolton clued us into what actually occurred in winterfell... his son killed all the greyjoys (and in the process burned winterfell to the ground) save theon who they kept as hostage and torture victim.

i'm not sure who is worse between joffrey and ramsay... actually i do, it's ramsay. cutting off body parts vs. death by arrow is no choice at all.

house greyjoy of the iron islands
theon aka reek had quite the season. if you read any other reviews out there (you shouldn't) you would know that pretty much everyone hates this storyline because it drags and doesn't seem to be all that important. although i would agree with that to a small extent, i still found it to be a really strong plot development this season. it carried over season 2's heavy emphasis on theon's character which isn't very strong at this point in the books. i, for one, love theon as a character and totally buy into his transformation from arrogant stark lackey to disgraced greyjoy heir to torture victim #1.

we finally got a peek into the goings on at the iron islands. yes yes... insert dick in a box joke here. yes yes... insert brad pitt "what's in the box (in uber whinny voice)" joke here.

so what did we learn over on the iron island.. that yara greyjoy ain't no punk and ain't gonna sit around while some bastard who probably gets seasick in a bathtub tries to tarnish the greyjoy name. fastest ship please. 50 of the best ironborn fighters please. see you in hell ramsay!

balon greyjoy though seems to be all talk with his "did you pay the iron price?" schtick while he just chills by the krakken fireplace.

house baratheon of storms end (now dragonstone)
melisandre purchases gendry from the brotherhood without banners for his king's blood. she leeches him (mid coitus no less!) to extract just a taste of blood, which she then uses to cast a spell against robb stark, joffrey baratheon and balon greyjoy.

davos finally gets in on the season 3 action after spending a few scenes on a rock and in a dungeon. stannis releases him with the assurance that he won't try and kill melisandre anymore. it's a good deal for everyone. but davos didn't promise not to talk shit to and about her every opportunity he gets.

davos and melisandre play angel/devil on stannis' shoulder as he debates whether to sacrifice gendry's life in his pursuit of the iron throne. davos makes the decision easy for him when he helps gendry escape by sea. davos' life seemed over at that point except for the ace up his sleeve (whitewalkers!).

for once, melisandre and davos agree that stannis' next move (instead of sulking in his depressing castle?) should be to take up the cause against the whitewalkers.

house targaryen of dragonstone
i know dany is probably everyone's favorite character (besides tyrion perhaps), but she's not mine and save for those special moments (like dragons!!!!) i find her storylines boring for the most part (but dragons!!!). first of all, without her dragons!! she'd be dead by now. even with her dragons! she almost died in the desert. then she goes around killing people with force (cool ass dragon force) just because she thinks slavery is wrong. listen, no doubt i think slavery is wrong, but she should read a history book once in a while and realize that her family history ain't so filled with nice guys (ie ppl nicknamed "the conqueror" tend not to be nice people nor are ppl nicknamed "mad").

i get that she could be a good ruler with morals and what not, but i just don't know if she'd be freeing all these slaves if not for the fact that she wants to use them to take westeros back by force (unsullied force and dragon force). and why does she even want the throne anyway? it's because she feels entitled to it based on her lineage. same reason stannis does or joffrey does. i don't buy the argument that dany's power comes from a moral highground.. it comes from fucking dragons, which she uses to burn people to death.

still though, i really hope her dragons burn joffrey to a crisp!

oh, and dany seems to be smitten with this daario naharis guy... as mormont cries in the corner. wait till someone tells him his father is dead.

night's watch
sam ran off with gilly and her baby and headed back to castle black. on the way they ran into bran, et al, and also killed a whitewalker with the dragon glass he found at the end of season 2.

back at castle black, sam gets maester aemon's permission to let gilly stay for the time being. and they also send out ravens to all the kings and lords about the whitewalker problem they're having (stannis heard you loud and clear). jon finally arrives back but we still have no idea what happened to all the night's watch traitors beyond the wall.

brotherhood without banners
their storyline mostly disappeared in the second half of the season once they sold gendry to the red priestess and then lost arya to the hound. we do see how shocked/impressed melisandre is with thoros of myr's ability to resurrect beric dondarrion six times. for a woman who can give birth to demon babies, i can only assume she doesn't impress easily.

misc.
petyr baelish aka littlefinger is off to marry lysa arryn (nee tully... why wasn't she at their father's funeral or at edmure's wedding aka the red wedding?) at the eyrie. i'm sure we'll catch up with him next season.

lord varys tried to send shae away (it rhymes) with diamonds. she refuses either out of pride or love. varys worries that her presence might endanger tyrion's life. i can't blame shae for distrusting the eunuch but i wonder if varys' fears may turn out to be well founded.

brienne fought a bear in harrenhal. now she's in king's landing so she can return the stark girls to their mother who is waiting patien...oh yea, i keep forgetting. i guess instead she'll kick it with sir loras and reminisce about the good old days as part of renly's rainbow gua... oh yea, they all think she killed him and loras vowed revenge. right right. good luck with all that brienne, you're with by friends now.

no hyperbole allowed rating: A- for the season
episode 6, "the climb" A-
episode 7, "the bear and the maiden fair" A-
episode 8, "second sons" B+
episode 9, "the rains of castamere" A
episode 10, "mhysa" A-

i think next year i'm going to start copying the format of a mad men recap i follow on grantland.com. i think it'll be easier to both follow and write starting next season and also should be more fun. in the meantime, i'll do a shorter version of it to end season 3.

GAME OF THRONES POWER RANKINGS:
1. tywin lannister - went from losing battles and watching each of his sons being captured by the starks to becoming the most powerful man in all of westeros.
2. daenerys targaryen - went from almost dying in the desert to messiah for all the slaves in essos (lands across the narrow sea)... plus dragons!!
3. margaery tyrell - went from a sexless marriage to being the influential wife-to-be of an actual king... she wants to be the queen.
4. joffrey baratheon - it's good to be the king.
5. melisandre - like margaery above, she's got the ear of a king and knows how to use what her mother gave to her.. like a lady. plus she burned three leeches and robb stark, the usurper, died. i forget who the other two leeches were for, but i'm sure it wasn't important.
6. roose bolton - went from extra on the set to warden of the north and all he had to do was backstab his king and let loose his crazy bastard son.
7. bran stark - i know i know, there's no way a stark can be on this list, let alone a stark who can't walk. but let's be real.. dany has dragons, melisandre has demon babies, but bran not only has a direwolf but is able to mind control it along with a man-giant whose only verbal ability is to say 'hodor' in comical fashion. this kid is legit.
8. mance rayder - king beyond the wall.. he has an enormous army that really wants to get south.
9. petyr baelish - went from lord of harrenhall (which never really materialized) to lord of the vale.
10. sam tarwell - he's the first person to kill a whitewalker in a thousand years.

honorable mention: whitewalkers - the opening scene of season 1 is enough to keep them on this list until we know for sure what their deal is.

off the list: lord commander mormont; robb stark; catelyn stark; theon greyjoy; jamie lannister and the rest of the lannister children whilst tywin is in charge

i appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts for next season. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 3)

- more warging starks?!
- valar morghulis!
- tyrion accused of murder!
- the martells of dorne!
- littlefinger loves poison (the preferred weapon of women, cravens and eunuchs) and tully/stark women!
- battle at castle black!!
- LADY STONEHEART!!!!

Review: Game of Thrones ("Kissed By Fire")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Thu, 02 May 2013 13:00:00 +0000

by richmin3000

"by what right does the wolf judge the lion?..... my name's jaime" - jaime lannister

"I was told you were drunk, impertinent and thoroughly debauched. You can imagine my disappointment at finding nothing but a browbeaten bookkeeper." - lady olenna to tyrion

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of season 3, episodes 1 and 2, "valar dohaeris" and "dark wings, dark words" - here
read my review of season 3, episode 3, "walk of punishment" - here
read my review of season 3, episode 4, "and now his watch has ended" - here

last week was mostly about plot development while this week we spent a lot of time in character development. jaime, stannis, robb and jon all had to question their roles in the world in light of ever changing circumstances. the choices they make will undoubtedly have serious consequences for the men they will become and the fate of those around them.

house stark of winterfell
no bran or rickon this week.

sansa tells littlefinger she might want to stay in king's landing after all. i don't think littlefinger likes the idea of the tyrells and lannisters trying to take his girl away from him.

arya is still with the brotherhood without banners on her way to riverrun to meet with her brother. gendry chooses to stay behind and join the brotherhood.

jon's loyalties continue to be tested by the wildlings as they approach the wall. and not by just tormund giantsbane but by ygritte as well. at least her tests have less of a chance to end in death, but alas it is game of thrones so all bets are off. either way, he has either abandoned his nights watch oath or has lived up to it by following what qhorin halfhand instructed him to do. this highlights one of the main themes of this episode and the show in general, which is one of loyalties and oaths... specifically, what choices do people make when their loyalties are conflicted and tested... more on this with jaime later.

as jon finds a little grey in the question of oaths, robb thinks in mostly black and white. like he assumes his father would, he beheads lord karstark after the murder of two lannister boys. it ends up costing him half his army when the karstark men abandon him but at least he has his honor right? and a new plan it seems, which is to recruit the help of the freys and take casterly rock, home of the lannisters.

house lannister of casterly rock
no joffrey this week

cersei tries to dig into the tyrell's schemes and learns that once again she's not as bright as she thinks she is when her father (after learning the truth of the tyrell's plan to marry sansa to loras) bequeaths her to marry loras and tyrion to marry sansa.

tyrion has another slow week highlighted by two great scenes, one with his family and one with lady olenna.

jaime tells brienne the story of how he got his nickname and thus the man who once threw a boy out a tower window has become a sympathetic, misunderstood. the complexity of jaime's nature is really well translated from the book. he also had good short scenes with roose bolton and former maester qyburn.

house tyrell of highgarden
it's a battle between lady olenna, tywin lannister, tyrion lannister and dragons for best scene stealer in this show.

house greyjoy of the iron islands
no theon et al this week.

house baratheon of storms end (now dragonstone)
we get to finally meet stannis' crazy wife and sickly daughter, shireen, this week. this is definitely a different side of stannis, who, up until now, came across as completely rigid and overly moralistic. he admits to his affair with the red woman to his wife who gives him her blessing. stannis' daughter is kept away in a dungeon-like room presumably because she's sick with a disease called greyscale, which makes her skin turn into grey scales. shireen goes to visit davos, the onion knight, in the real dungeons.

house targaryen of dragonstone
dany is en route to yunkai (we only know this because it's a new destination on the map) with her new army. she has them choose their own leader, a man named grey worm. her two confidants, barristan selmy and jorah mormont rub each other the wrong way a little bit. jorah tries to find out of barristan knows about his double dealing ways back in season 1 when barristan had the ear of king robert and may have been privy to secrets. it seems that selmy knows nothing about it. barristan, however, does know that jorah is a disgraced former slave trader with a bad reputation in westeros and suggests he take a back seat. jorah politely declines.

night's watch
no news after the death of lord commander mormont.

brotherhood without banners
beric dondarrion faces off against the hound with his firey sword. (where else have we seen swords on fire? if you said on dragonstone when stannis took the oath of the lord of light, you would be right). though the hound is afraid of fire, he's still able to prevail against beric killing him in the process. except that thoros of myr, the red priest, is able to bring him back to life, for the 6th time they say. that's an interesting development. if this was a game of gods show, the lord of light would certainly be winning. the seven would be second and the tree faces would be a distant third.

no hyperbole allowed rating: A-
although we didn't have nearly as many jump-out-of-your-seat moments this week, this episode was probably the best yet in terms of style and structure. no scene changes felt rushed or out of place as they have in previous episodes as they bounced around from riverrun to dragonstone to yunkai and to king's landing. the world finally felt a little bit smaller and perhaps that's because the various storylines are starting to relate to each other and to the past as well.

robb's beheading bring us back to ned stark in the show's premiere episode. jon's storyline resonates a lot stronger since the death of lord commander mormont. jorah's brief treachery against dany in season 1 has the potential to come back to haunt him. the tyrells and lannisters seem to be on the verge of all-out political warfare. arya seems awfully close to reconnecting with her mom and brother.

i can't believe that the show is already half-way done and yet we have so much farther to go before season 3 is in the books (so to speak). i'll be taking next week off to travel but will be back after episode 7 to recap both episodes 6 and 7.

i'm excited to guide us through season 3 of game of thrones so would appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts as we move forward. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 3)

- there's been a lot of talk about where this season will end, especially about catelyn's storyline. i think they'll save that for next year. i'm also curious to see how the writers will convince the viewers that robb has figured out a way to save his own ass by marrying edmure tully to one of the freys. at this point i think everyone believes robb is up shit's creek without a paddle so if the red wedding is going to have the super shocking effect i hope it does, the writers will need to rehabilitate robb at least a bit in the coming episodes.
- i'm also excited to see arya and the hound together but it's going to be awful to see her get so close to her family only to have them die.
- i think that shay is not going to like tyrion's engagement to sansa which i presume will prompt her betrayal or maybe it won't be a betrayal at all and tywin will just apply the pressure as he always does. either way, tyrion should get more screen time soon though maybe not till season 4.
- jon, the wildlings and ygritte are about to climb the wall, which will make for another great storyline that ends with death and disappointment.

Review: Game of Thrones ("And Now His Watch Has Ended")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Wed, 24 Apr 2013 19:14:00 +0000

by richmin3000

"I don't distrust you because you're a woman. I distrust you because you're not as smart as you think you are" - Tywin Lannister to Cersei

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of season 3, episodes 1 and 2, "valar dohaeris" and "dark wings, dark words" - here
read my review of season 3, episode 3, "walk of punishment" - here

last week i wrote that "finally things have really started to move" and that couldn't have been any truer in episode 4. this was most certainly the most plot moving forward episode in 2+ seasons of GOT... so much so that the death of lord commander mormont was not even one of the last couple of scenes of the episode. so much so that the early great scenes between lord varys and tyrion, varys and lady olenna, cersei and tywin were all a distant memory by the time dany burned the people of astapor to a crisp.

house stark of winterfell
bran dreams of a raven and grows frustrated with his newfound skills. catelyn loves to nag even in bran's dreams.

arya is hanging with the brotherhood without banners and reminds the hound of killing the butcher's boy in season 1.

sansa hangs out with margaery and is offered to her brother loras. too bad he's part of the kingsguard...oh and gay. varys however learns that littlefinger is planning on taking sansa to the eyrie when he leaves to become the new lord there.

no jon this week or the wildlings.

house tully of riverrun
no appearance this week.

house lannister of casterly rock
king joffrey continues to be charmed by margaery tyrell and awkwardly waves to the crowd.

cersei is reminded by lady olenna the inequalities of being born a woman so has a nice chat with her father about it. it goes as well as one could expect. and who is tywin writing all those letters to? hmmm

tyrion learns a lot from varys but not why his sister tried to have him killed in the battle of blackwater bay.

sir jamie lannister, the kingslayer, drinks horse urine. he attempts to fight with his left hand. he becomes a little depressed and starts to question his self-worth. brienne gives him a pep talk and calls him a woman.

house tyrell of highgarden
lady olenna is great. nonexistent meets decrepit...i couldn't get that out of my mind for a day and a half. she's also quite the schemer just like her granddaughter margaery. they certainly are not willing to stand pat in service of the lannisters it seems. getting sansa stark into the family fold might prove quite useful.

house greyjoy of the iron islands
theon circles back to the place he just escaped thanks to the guy who helped him escape. i get it, but do you? doubtful. i think it'll be worth it once it's all explained but hard for me to say for sure. his storyline in the show is much more detailed than in the books since he doesn't even have a storyline in book 3. i've read many reviews that don't find his storyline very interesting, but as i've said before, i am actually more invested in his storyline that i am any others in show. perhaps that's because i know what eventually becomes of him.

house baratheon of storms end (now dragonstone)
nada

house targaryen of dragonstone
dany speaks valyrian? who knew? one could guess since her people are originally from old valyria but it was a nice twist in the show and well executed. dany knows from her experience in qarth that her dragons are not found of chains and leases. her cunning and moralistic hatred of slavery have resulted in an army of 8k freed unsullied.... and three growing dragons...and two westerosi knights.

night's watch
you could say that the lord commander's death came out of left field but then you weren't paying close enough attention. he fell victim to moral compromise, which dany has shown unwilling to do.. in this case, compromising the values the night's watch were supposed to hold dear... the values that jon and sam kept harping about. lord mormont's reluctant acceptance of craster and his "ways" only led to discord and resentment among his men, especially considering that the lot of them are rapists and murderers to begin with. it was an unceremonious end to his life, but a great turning point in the story of the night's watch especially with the wildlings fast approaching the wall.

brotherhood without banners
we finally meet the leader of the merry gang of vigilantes... beric dondarrion who was re-cast since season 1 although you probably wouldn't remember him otherwise since he only appeared for about 3 seconds. as he states in this past episode, he was ordered by ned stark (whilst sitting on the iron throne when king robert was away hunting) to capture the mountain for pillaging the countryside. ned stark ordered tywin lannister to answer for his bannerman's crimes and stripped the mountain of all lands and titles. so since then, beric has been pursuing the mountain (who was pursuing him while at harrenhall) with the help of thoros of myr, a warrior priest, who also prays to the lord of light, just like melisandre. got it?

miscellaneous
varys deserves a special nod here as well as littlefinger in coming episodes i'm sure. varys teaches us all that he is not to be underestimated after displaying extreme patience in exacting revenge against the sorcerer that took his root and stem. i'd like everyone to remember that in season 1, it was he and magister illyrio (who took care of dany and her brother across the narrow sea and arranged her marriage to khal drogo) who were conferring in the dragon vaults about the impending war (which was overheard by arya). varys' motivations are not well known but suffice it to say that he certainly is motivated.

his conversation with littlefinger's right hand woman and lady olenna demonstrate his eagerness to limit littlefinger's power and influence. is it just to save the realm? he did tell ned stark in his jail cell that he only wishes to serve the realm so perhaps his motivation is pure. perhaps he just hates magic as much as he says. what does that mean with respect to dany and her dragons? why did he have a secret meeting with magister illyrio who was helping the targaryens? all good questions.

no hyperbole allowed rating: A
we are moving the chess pieces ever so slightly. dany's power grows across the narrow sea. the realm's protectors in the night's watch have fallen under hard times just as the wildlings and white walkers are growing in strength. all the while, the families in westeros are all vying for power and influence. even varys and littlefinger take their positions as power brokers behind the scenes.

i like how the writers are focusing each episode on about half the cast instead of trying to squeeze in a storyline for every character. as we get introduced to more and more characters (which we certainly will) it will become impossible to keep up with all the characters on a week-to-week basis. the one character i hope they return to next week and for a few scenes at least, is davos who finds himself imprisoned on dragonstone.

i'm excited to guide us through season 3 of game of thrones so would appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts as we move forward. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 3)

- i expect dany's storyline to take a little bit of a break since she doesn't really get up to much from here on out. i think they'll throw in some invasion scenes to show her strength and get viewers excited but i think we've reached her pinnacle for the season. makes me think they could have dragged this out for a few more episodes but i'm glad they didn't because we have so much to get through....
- like tyrion and sansa... when is that happening or are they skipping that? the going ons in king's landing should be fun with a lot of twists and turns between littlefinger, varys, sansa, tyrion, the lannisters and tyrells.
- i'm a bit confused as to who roose bolton is pretending to be right now...do his men not know that he's roose bolton or do they think he's reek? i know i'm sort of jumping ahead a bit but obviously they have to let us in on the secret soon or viewers are going to be way too confused to even care anymore.
- i mentioned tywin's proficient letter writing campaign above and people seem to think that he's taking steps to ensure that the red wedding happens without a hitch.

Review: Game of Thrones ("Walk of Punishment")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Wed, 17 Apr 2013 20:15:00 +0000

by richmin3000

"Maybe you were as good as people said, once. Or maybe people just love to overpraise a famous name" - Brienne of Tarth to Jaime Lannister

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of season 3, episodes 1 and 2, "valar dohaeris" and "dark wings, dark words" - here

finally things have really started to move in episode 3. we've checked in with all the old characters so we only have to look forward from here on out. we added a new piece on the map in riverrun, home to catelyn stark's family, the tullys, and along with that, a couple of new faces. deals were struck, wars are being planned and hot pie is being left behind. a lot to discuss...

house stark of winterfell
robb and catelyn are in riverrun for the funeral of hoster tully, catelyn's father and lord of riverrun. we meet edmure, her brother and new lord of riverrun, and brynden aka blackfish, her paternal uncle and as his name suggest, the black sheep (fish) of his family. robb, and the north by extension, seem to have little patience these days as a run of victories still have left them with little to show for it except mills.

arya and gendry are off with the brotherhood without banners and the hound to who knows where. not with hot pie though who has decided to stay behind to bake wolf bread. hard to tell if arya is truly a prisoner or a guest as thoros of myr suggests. fyi: arya asked the hound if he recalled the inn they were at... it's the same inn where he killed the baker's boy in season 1 after she struck joffrey... and yes, that seems ages ago.

jon snow and the wildling lot have stumbled upon a lot of dead horses at the fist of the first men. they learn that a few hundred night's watchmen are now running around as zombies. with the knowledge that their defenses are low, mance rayder plans an attack on the wall. jon's old friend, sam, reunites with gilly who just gave birth to a baby boy (whitewalker's favorite!).

no sansa, bran or rickon this week.

house tully of riverrun
edmure (fyi: the actor played brutus on hbo's incredible show, 'rome') tully is catelyn's brother and the new lord of riverrun. but his ineptitude (on display after failing to light his father's boat on fire with his arrow) highlights the sudden perilous position the northerners find themselves in.

if you recall in season 1, the mountain (the hound's brother) was ravaging riverrun on the orders of tywin lannister. in this episode, edmure talks about how he was able to drive the mountain away only to robb's dismay. robb had a grand plan to trap the mountain which edmure inadvertantly ruined by not trusting in his orders. these interactions between robb and edmure highlight the fact that they are young leaders that neither command the same respect as their fathers.

the blackfish is catelyn's uncle and seems to be one of those grumpy vets who have no patience for the incompetence of the young. he's a great character in book 3 and the casting seems perfect. the show does a great job at giving us a sense of several character's nature in short, visual bursts. the introduction of these two characters and riverrun on the map of westeros should clue everyone into its importance in season 3.

house lannister of casterly rock
besides the musical chairs with tywin, cersei, tyrion and the rest of the small council, there was no real movement for tywin, cersei and no appearance by king joffrey.

tyrion is named the new master of coin after tywin announces that littlefinger will marry lysa arryn (catelyn's sister) and become the new lord of the eyrie. it was also mentioned that roose bolton (robb's bannerman) holds harrenhall which was supposed to be littlefinger's.

jamie's storyline was the highlight of this week obviously with him getting the ned stark treatment, only it's his hand that's gotten chopped off and not his head. after his capture by bolton men (stark bannermen) he had a lot of great character moments with brienne and his captors, exposing his lazy reliance on his family name, quick wits and physical gifts. jaime though has come a long way from pushing bran out of a tower window to saving brienne's honor in this past episode. jaime's character is well explained by his choice in life to forego his legal claim to the riches of casterly rock (as described by tyrion earlier this year) and join the mad king arys targaryen's kingsguard. he's a man who has always struggled with his identity, his family name and the ease in which he's coasted through life. now he's a man whose greatest skill has just been taken away from him. i can't wait to see how that will affect his character's story arc.

house tyrell of highgarden
no appearances by the tyrell clan.

house greyjoy of the iron islands
theon was released from his torture device by someone who says he's theon's sister's man only to be hunted down by those who were torturing him only to then again be saved by the same man who helped him escape in the first place. not sure what's going on exactly but i have a pretty good feeling we'll find out soon enough (and i have my own assumptions which i'll explain in the spoiler section down below).

house baratheon of storms end (now dragonstone)
the red woman is off to run some errands and king stannis seems ornery about it all.

house targaryen of dragonstone
dany agrees to purchase all of the unsullied soldiers in exchange for one of her dragons over the fierce objections of both of her consigliere. up until that point, jorah mormont and barristan selmy seemed to be at odds over every other issue. jorah, himself a former slave trader (which caused him to be banished by ned stark) has advised dany to buy the unsullied while barristan has advised her that a slave army will not give her the loyalty she needs to win.

no hyperbole allowed rating: A-
this was a big character development episode. i think we are starting to see some holes in the northern leadership, particular with experience and decision making. the lannisters for all their strength and money aren't the tightest family around. dany is struggling with the idea of buying slaves after her quiet stroll down the walk of punishment. jon will have to choose how far he's willing to go in order to prove his worth to the wildlings... will he attack the wall with his new brothers? theon is learning quickly that strength lies in honor, family or purpose, of which he has none.

i'm excited to guide us through season 3 of game of thrones so would appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts as we move forward. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 3)

- the first thing i want to discuss is theon's storyline which i think, after two slightly confusing (bc his storyline was only told as recollections in book 5 and not told in the present in book 3) episodes, has cleared itself up. i have to assume that the person who helped him escape and later saved him is really ramsay bolton, roose's bastard son, who was supposed to rescue winterfell and was obviously the one who burned it to the ground. the main clue is that when he shot a guy with the arrow he called him "bastard" both a fact and insult. i am very interested in finding out how they resolve this storyline and expose his identity to the audience.
- a longer term spoiler so i will keep it short - tyrion's mention of the bank that has lent king's landing all that money... they always get paid one way or another.
- edmure and robb seem destined for great things together...
- i think next week we'll see the planned union between tyrion and sansa and soon thereafter, littlefinger's escape with her to the eyrie.

Review: Game of Thrones ("Valar Dohaeris" and "Dark Wings, Dark Words"

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Wed, 10 Apr 2013 20:08:00 +0000

by richmin3000

"We'll find you accommodations more suited to your name and as a reward for your accomplishments during the Battle of Blackwater Bay. And when the time is right, you will be given a position fit for your talents, so that you can serve your family and protect our legacy. And if you serve faithfully, you will be rewarded with a suitable wife - and I would let myself be consumed by maggots before mocking the family name and making you heir to Casterly Rock!" - Tywin Lannister

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

back by popular demand, i will be recapping season 3 of hbo's game of thrones much like i did for season 2, which you can read here. i will try and follow a similar structure to last year which means i will group my focus on the various families or locations, depending on what each episode requires or allows. due to some lengthy travel plans in the middle of this season, i won't be able to provide a recap every week but will play catch up when i can.

house stark of winterfell
at the end of season 1, the starks were the supposed good guys of westeros, victims of lannister deceit and cunning. at the end of season 2, the starks were dismantled, dismayed and seemingly disinterested in honorable pursuits. robb had gone off and married a foreign nurse even though he had already been promised to another... so his army could cross the twins. arya escaped harrenhall with some trickery along with gendry and hot pie. bran and rickon escaped winterfell after theon's assault. sansa was plotting an escape of king's landing with the help of lord petyr baelish. jon snow killed qhorin halfhand to join up with the wildlings. and catelyn stark released jamie lannister in the hopes of exchanging him for her daughters.

at the beginning of season 3, we find that the starks continue to face a multitude of precarious situations with little reason for optimism. robb is still married to a charlie chaplin's granddaughter and now catelyn is her son's prisoner. his army is beginning to lose faith after the loss of jamie and also stannis' loss at the battle of blackwater bay. the lannister army, now with the help of the tyrells, is twice the size of robb's. even for a boy king who has won every battle so far, that is daunting.

catelyn stark continues to blame herself for all of her families' misfortunes and right she should. she sucks. it's possible she'll acquire some redeeming qualities down the road...

sansa is still planning on escaping king's landing with lord baelish without any sense of suspicion. oh you silly sansa, full of traitor's blood, when will you ever learn?

jon snow finally meets the king beyond the wall, mance rayder, a former crow (aka night's watchman) himself. they seem to be heading in the same direction as everyone else... south. it may have something to do with zombies (as an aside, the zombies are not whitewalkers. whitewalkers are the ones who ride horses and eat craster's baby sons. the zombies are called wights).

arya, hot pie and gendry are on the road again and this time they'll definitely make it to their destinat...oops, they got caught again. though, their captures this time don't seem as intent on feeding them to rats. led (in the show and for now) by a merry vigilante by the name of thoros of myr, the brotherhood without banners were spoken of last season by the tickler in harrenhall. without spoiling their purpose in the show, let's just say that they fight for the people against the wicked. i'll give further explanation in the spoiler section and in the coming weeks once we know where the show is heading. at the end of the episode 2, the brotherhood without banners captures the hound (who left king's landing during the battle of blackwater bay) who immediately recognizes arya as a stark.

lastly, bran and rickon are headed north to find jon snow. that probably will work out just as planned. anyway, in the books, rickon and wildling osha go off on their own, while bran, hodor and the reeds head north. also in the books, the reeds are in winterfell when theon attacks. they are there to hang out with bran because howland reed (who is mentioned in the show as saving ned's life once) is very close with the starks.

the most important character development with the starks thus far is with bran, who they have flat out acknowledged to be a warg, which is like a psychic/were(wolf). the show did a bad job just laying it out there like that, but they did a good job by showing us a wildling warg in action right before telling us that bran was a warg. a warg essentially can go into the mind and body of an animal though bran can only do that while he's sleeping. he's been doing this since season 1 when we would see him dreaming of himself as a wolf so this shouldn't be a big surprise for those who haven't read the books.

bran though is not just a warg but also a greenseer, like jojen reed, the strange boy who is explaining this all to bran (and us). a greenseer is someone who can see into the past, future and present. remember in season 1 where bran and osha went into the winterfell crypts because he had a dream about his father being dead???? remember??? no? well, he did. believe me. osha said it was a dream and then when he came up, maester luwin told him the bad news about his father being dead. coincidence? nope. he's a greenseer.

in that same scene in season 1, recall that when bran went down to the crypts, he ran into rickon who said he had the same dream essentially. i have no added knowledge about this from the books, but i think we can only assume rickon has some of this ability as well.

i also want to note for people who think this rise in magic is either stupid or random, let me remind everyone that all the "magic" is tied to either the whitewalker or the dragons or both. the whitewalkers had been dead for a long time and just recently have come back. same thing with the dragons. and in season 2, the warlocks of qarth mentioned that their magic had grown stronger since the birth of the dragons. this is not a coincidence and we can only assume that bran's abilities or anyone else's for that matter are tied to these things.

house lannister of casterly rock
i'd say as a family, they are doing pretty well. at the end of season 2, the lannisters had just defeated stannis baratheon in the battle of blackwater bay. tyrion was the mastermind who held down the fort until his father, lord tywin, could come with reinforcements.

to start season 3, things look at least status quo for the entire family, if not particular pleasant. jamie was en route to the capitol to be reunited with his family until his very recent predicament with some bolton men (more on this later). never change joffrey... never change. cersei seems bored. tywin seems busy. tyrion seems annoyed.

the biggest development is jamie's potential recapture by the bolton clan, who are bannermen for the starks. house bolton should become a very important family this season. they are led by lord roose bolton, who is robb stark's right hand man (not the guy with the big beard but the other one who comes with bad news in episode 2). roose's bastard son, ramsay, is the one who was sent to winterfell to take it back from theon. and now some boltons are on the verge of taking back jamie. that's all i can say about that right now.

house tyrell of highgarden
there's not much to say about them but i needed to fit them in somewhere. at the end of season 2, they joined forces with the lannisters. i'm sure the main reason was to make margaery a queen, but i also think sir loras wanted to get revenge on stannis for killing his beloved renly.

margaery seems like she'd make a great queen not because she is so sweet but because she can play so many different roles. she can be just as cunning as cersei without being such a bitch about it. she's a character that didn't get as many pages in the book as she's getting screen time but i like what the show is doing with her character. in fact, i think some of the best characters in the show are ones that did not get a lot of time in the books (theon, for example).

house greyjoy of the iron islands
at the end of season 2, theon went from overtaking winterfell to being betrayed by his own men. we aren't exactly sure what happened to winterfell (i'm fairly certain but they don't really explain it in the show) and that uncertainty has extended itself through these first two episodes of season 3. also, i think we're left to assume that lord balon greyjoy, theon's father, and yara greyjoy, his sister, are still plundering the north in the starks' absence, but that is just an assumption at this point.

in season 3, we find that theon is being tortured by a group of unknown characters. they are interrogating him about his reasons for attacking winterfell. i don't know whether they are just trying to get information or whether they are northmen, but hopefully we'll find out soon.

house baratheon of storms end (now dragonstone)
stannis was defeated in the battle of blackwater bay at the end of season 2. his would-be hand, davos seaworth aka the onion knight, was thrown into the sea after the wildfire explosion.

we find davos strewn upon a rock in the middle of the sea only to be saved by salladhor saan's men and brought back to dragonstone to meet with a defeated and darkened stannis, who regrets not taking melisandre to war with him. his defeat has lent more credibility to her cause which does not sit well with davos, who gets thrown into jail for standing up against the red woman.

unlike theon's storyline which is much better in the show than in the books, davos' storyline is quite the opposite. in the books, they are thorough with his backstory and allegiance to stannis but in the show, he comes across as naively loyal. i'm hoping they do a better job with his character since he's a favorite of mine in the books, but i don't like what's happening thus far in season 3.

house targaryen of dragonstone
dany had the worst storyline of season 2, made worse by the show's need to provide the audience with glimpses of dragons every so often. the highlight of book 2 was her experience in the house of the undying, where she saw a lot of inexplicable images that the fanboy community interprets to be prophetic in nature. the show didn't exactly go that route but dany's experience in qarth and especially in the house of the undying were still the only thing that happened to her in season 2. her dragons were able to protect her and themselves from danger and allowed her to take money and ships out of qarth by force.

in season 3, we see that the dragons have grown some but are still not the immense creatures we imagine they will one day become. dany and her khalasar have set sail for astapor in order to buy an army. astapor is a slave city that specializes in training and selling mercenary slave soldiers named the unsullied. dany is preparing for her eventual return to westeros. dany, however, finds herself in a moral quandary about buying and using slave soldiers. jorah mormont is advising her that the only way she'll be able to become queen is to have an army worthy of battle.

while dany and mormont are walking around astapor, they have a little run in with a warlock girl and are saved by barristan selmy, who you may have seen during the "previously on" segment before episode 1. in season 1, he was forced into retirement by king joffrey for failing to protect his father during his hunting trip. selmy said a few parting words and left. he tells dany upon their meeting that he's been looking for her so that he could join her queensguard.

barristan selmy's appearance in the book was very surprising as he pretended to be someone else for some time before exposing himself to dany. but that's easier to pull off on readers than viewers so the way the show did it seems fine to me. what people need to realize is that barristan selmy was kingsguard to king aerys II aka the mad king, who was the king that jamie lannister killed that immediately preceded king robert of house baratheon.

no hyperbole allowed rating: B and B+, respectively for both episodes
these two episodes taken together are mostly table setters for the numerous characters' storylines to come. with the addition of several new characters, we probably will be left without visiting some of our favorite characters week-to-week, like dany in episode 2. i think it'll be for the best especially since it would be foolish to squeeze in character developments for everyone each week.

just to orient everyone to the characters' whereabouts.
- jon, the wildlings and the nights watch are heading south to the wall. bran, rickon, et al are heading north to the wall.
- robb and catelyn along with some of their army (the rest are staying in harrenhall under the leadership of roose bolton) are heading to riverrun (in the west) for catelyn's father's funeral. arya and her crew are also planning on going to riverrun to find protection from her grandfather who she doesn't know is dead.
- the lannisters are hanging around in winterfell with the tyrells. jamie was headed there before his seeming recapture. remember that myrcell (cercei's daughter) was sent to dorne (which we haven't seen yet) for her protection before the battle.
- dany is in astapor, across the narrow sea, to the try and raise an army

last season, we had this buildup to a big battle between stannis and the lannisters. this season we don't have such a specific plot point to look forward to so it'll be mostly about dany trying to make her way back to westeros, those beyond the wall trying to fend off the white walkers and warn everyone else of their danger, the lannisters and tyrells trying to hold onto their power, and the starks trying to find a way to regroup as a family and army.

i'm excited to guide us through season 3 of game of thrones so would appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts as we move forward. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 3)

- piggy...i mean sam... forgot to send the ravens. now no one in the seven kingdoms will have the chance to receive the news of whitewalkers and completely dismiss it as northern superstitions.
- so we've met thoros of myr, but what about beric dondarrion???? i assume he'll show up if for no other reason than i just googled it and he will show up. that's probably a good reason though to assume things. thoros is quite funny and i think he'll make a good team with beric as his straight man. would like to see his flaming sword though (that's what she said!). ha.
- i'm a little unsure what's going on with theon right now. obviously in the book, his backstory isn't explained thoroughly, if at all, until book 5. i want to assume that he is being tortured by bolton men and is in the process of becoming reek, but there are some things that make me question if that is what is occurring right at this moment or if they are going to change his story around (which i can't imagine being the case). the reason i'm a bit confused is because the show makes it seem like he is going to escape with the help of his sister's men. i hope that the show does a good job with theon's backstory here because his story in season 2 was my favorite part of the show and one that was not fully fleshed out in the books.
- i'm assuming, along with everyone else who has read the books, that this season will end with the red wedding. i'm a bit surprised that lord karstark told robb that he lost the war the day he married talisa. i'm not sure if they are being too heavy handed with that storyline or if it is going over people's heads.

Favs Was on the Today Show

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Thu, 28 Feb 2013 18:46:00 +0000

I was up till 5am working on wedding invitations, so when my fiancee tried to wake me up to watch retiring White House speechwriter, Jon Favreau, on the Today Show at 7, I turned over and went back to sleep. But I thought to myself, I bet that all-knowing Internet thingamabob will have some record of it. And lo, I am wise.

http://uverseonline.att.net/tv/show/nbc-today-show?play=h___60186224

Good thing we gave him the ol' podcast 3rd degree to polish him up before his first TV appearance.

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 22)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Tue, 29 Jan 2013 14:00:00 +0000

We're pleased to welcome to the podcast Jon Favreau, the chief speechwriter for the President of the United States, Barack Obama, in case you didn't know the name of the president. You should really know that. He's even more famous than Honey Boo Boo.

So many questions! As nerdy political types, we were rather giddy at the prospect of asking lots of questions to the most famous guy we've had on the podcast, and the fact that he works in the White House makes him one of the most interesting guests we can imagine. We had probably 50 more questions to ask, but we all needed to get to sleep so we could get up and do our day jobs, which are of varying importance. Jon's office is obviously in the White House, so that's a pretty big deal. Colin works at his parents' house and it's kind of a brownish grey, so that's not quite as glamorous. Rich lives in New York City, so you know, he thinks whatever he does is super important like everyone else in New York. Probably trying to get some jerk off for a crime he doesn't want to take responsibility for committing. Whatever.

In this week's podcast, Jon gives us the rundown of how he got the gig, in case you're trying to get a job as chief speechwriter of the President of the United States. It seems to involve meeting the guy who becomes president before he does so. That's critically important, in fact. So that's one of the early steps to say the least. You'll have to listen to learn about the other steps.

Jon tells a couple of funny White House stories, but mostly what we've gleaned is that Barack Obama is a man he admires and respects and is the real leader and mentor of the men and women who work in the White House. It is encouraging to learn that Jon has not been made cynical by his time in Washington, but he would never dream of a career in politics. Our bet is that he gets a cushy think tank gig, maybe spends some time on the Rachel Maddow show, teaches a course at a university, writes a couple of books, etc.

This is POTUS' speech to the Nobel committee in Oslo, Norway in December of 2009. Jon mentioned it as perhaps his proudest moment as the president's speechwriter.

We bet there aren't too many of you who've watched it in its entirety. Aren't you glad you did? You probably had an opinion about his having received the Nobel Peace Prize, but you probably didn't take the time to watch the speech. Seriously, what would you know about anything without this podcast? Thank you, Jon, for recommending it.

Get your podcast, here!!!! or
http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_22.mp3

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 21)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Mon, 29 Oct 2012 13:00:00 +0000

**Just in time for Hurricane Sandy...there's no better way to spend your hours shut in with no electricity than to listen to our podcast on one of your (hopefully) battery-operated devices. And in case your TV stops working, just listen to it over and over again**

Aaaaaaaaand we're back! 2 months off have been good rest for our podcast muscles. The ones in our brains. The brain muscles. It's all very scientific. Our most recent podcast is so old that in it we recapped the London Olympics. We barely even remember those! Other than the fact that we beat the crap out of China.

Rich and Colin have a surprise guest this week! Guess who! Just guess. We'll give you a hint: he's related to Colin and his name rhymes with Fawn O'Shiggins.

We spend most of this week's 'cast talking about politics, which is nice for Colin since he gets to gang up on that pinko commie, Rich, with his America-loving conservative brother man, Sean. Guess who's writing this podcast description! We'll give you a hint: he's extremely good-looking and his name rhymes with Folin O'Shiggins. And also, he's quite handsome in case we forgot to mention the part about his extreme handsomeness.

We make some small mention of how awesome TV has become with shows like Game of Thrones, Homeland, Waking the Dead or the Walking Dead or whatever, and all that other stuff that's on. Rich thinks it might not be that the TV shows are so awesome but that it's probably 'cause we're old and can't be bothered to go out and do what those crazy kids do with the dancing and the drinking and the bizzing and the bopping.

And also, this is what we think of when we see President Obama's "Forward." campaign slogan.

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_21.mp3

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 20)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Mon, 20 Aug 2012 13:00:00 +0000

What actually is a media noche? Well, if you listen to Episode 20 you'll find out.

Rich and Colin are back to discuss highlights from the 2012 London Olympics - We talk about Michael Phelps, Colin's hatred of China, the US/Jamaican rivalry in sprinting, dirty women's soccer and how our "other" allegiances fared in these Olympics (Great Britain was 1st, Korea 2nd, Italy 3rd, Cuba 4th and Ireland 5th).

Lastly we talk about Colin being a born-again hardcore Republican which makes Rich sad... or mad... it's hard to tell the difference with him. Colin expresses his love of Paul Ryan and lesser love (you could say dislike even) of President Obama. Rich and Colin argue around and over each other just like real Democrats and Republicans!! Min/O'Higgins 2016!

No Hyperbole Allowed wishes the Segway a Happy 10th Anniversary!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

0:00 - Intro/What does Lisa Simpson have to do with the Olympics?
2:55 - Mr. Johnson goes to jail
7:35 - The official O'Higgins family definition of a Media Noche
10:15 - The official 2012 London Olympics coverage
42:50 - Colin thinks FDR is vastly overrated because he (Colin) is a Republican in case you forgot
1:12:00 - Colin loves Paul Ryan because he (Colin) is a Republican in case you forgot
1:16:15 - Closing/Colin hates the Segway and Rich hates Blackberry

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_20.mp3

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 19)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Mon, 23 Jul 2012 12:30:00 +0000

Rich and Colin are back from their prolonged absence with Episode 19 of the No Hyperbole Allowed podcast, just in time to discuss the epic conclusion to Christopher Nolan's Dark Knight trilogy, The Dark Knight Rises.

Unfortunately, the opening of this highly anticipated film was marred by the tragic and senseless killing of 12 people in Colorado at a late screening on Thursday night. Rich and Colin spend a lot of time discussing what it all means and whether there's even anything to understand about this sad event.

1:00 - Intro
4:00 - Rich is sad about the impending closure of David's Cafe II on Lincoln Road in Miami Beach, FL
10:30 - Shooting in Aurora, CO
43:20 - The Dark Knight Rises review (Many Spoilers! Don't listen to this part until you've seen the film.)
1:04:05 - Rich can't wait for the Man of Steel next summer

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_19.mp3

To Be or Not To Be... a Brooklyn Nets Fan

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Wed, 18 Jul 2012 23:00:00 +0000

by richmin3000

i am a new york knicks fan. later this year, the brooklyn nets (formerly the new jersey nets, formerly the new york nets) will be opening up their new basketball arena (barclay's center) in brooklyn, new york, just a few minutes walk from my apartment. after the tumultuous last several days over the knicks failure to re-sign jeremy lin, i am beginning to wonder what it would take (and mean) for me to start rooting for the new cross-town team.

1. location, location, location

the brooklyn nets new arena is located on the corner of atlantic avenue and flatbush avenue. my apartment is located on the corner of atlantic avenue and court street. google maps tells me that the arena is 0.9 miles away and a brisk 18-minute walk.

the new york knicks play in the world's most famous arena, madison square garden. located conveniently above pennsylvania station in the borough of manhattan, it's a 31-minute commute (hopstop.com) from my apartment via the 2/3 (red) line on the new york subway.

2. history

the brooklyn nets were once the new jersey nets, the thought of which makes me a little nauseous. however, the were also once the new york nets, playing on long island for about 10 years, which makes me a little happy. as a person who was born in queens, grew up on long island and now reside in brooklyn, i have a very strong connection with this plot of land.

the new york knicks haven't won a title since the early 70s and have made the nba finals twice in my lifetime (in 94 and 99). for the past decade or so, they have been the laughing stock of professional sports under the leaderless pairing of owner, james dolan, and general manager, isiah thomas, which bring me to....

3. management

the brooklyn nets are owned by a russian billionaire who went up against vladimir putin this year in his bid to be russian president. the nets are also co-owned by brookyn-based rapper and kanye west mentor, jay-z (i don't know why i mentioned that last part... i think just so colin could think of kanye west).

the new york knicks are owned by a moron and a man whose primary existence is seemingly to frustrate loyal new york sports fans. he also owns the new york rangers and cablevision, the worst cable company ever (time warner sucks too... go verizon fios!!).

4. roster

the brooklyn nets have deron williams (don't like the way he left utah), brook lopez (can't root for the man), kris humphries (won't root for the man), joe johnson (should never have left the suns) and gerald wallace (he's fun to watch). they were close to trading for dwight howard which would have been very exciting. as is, the current roster is none-too-exciting.

the new york knicks have melo (hated the trade), amare (just wish he wasn't always hurt, about to get hurt or recovering from being hurt), tyson chandler (amazing), jason kidd (i don't root for wife-beaters, especially over-the-hill ones... jk), raymond felton (i'm cool with it), jr smith (show me something), marcus camby (welcome home) and steve novak (why not). i feel like i'm missing someone... more on that later.

5. love

i don't love the brooklyn nets, but they do have some charming qualities and some objective characteristics that should lend itself to my affection. it's like when you see two people of the same race in the movies and you just think they should date each other because, in the back of your mind, it just makes sense. whether or not they are compatible is secondary to whether or not they superficially look cute together.

the new york knicks, on the other hand, are like being in a passion and drama-filled relationship that you can't seem to escape. you break up one week, get back together the next. nothing about the two of you makes any sense. you like to go out and eat steak, she likes to stay home and eat tofu. as much as you love them, you hate them the same-it comes from the same place. but after some point (if you're sane) you want to be in a healthy relationship... you want trust and stability, you want respect. after one random awful break-up, you decide that enough is enough and you need to move on. that time is different for everyone.

6. conclusion

when i was young (a teenager), there were the knicks and then everything else (in sports). i was a mets fan and a giants fan, but i didn't care much about baseball and the giants played in new jersey. the knicks were everything to me. i followed the 90s knicks as closely as i've followed any sports teams in my life.

but now i've reached a point where i feel like i'm getting abused and shunned every time i put myself out there. last year, the knicks made a very exciting (though they overpaid, in my opinion) trade for carmelo anthony that was based as much, if not more, in making money as it was in winning an nba ring. now, after a very interesting and positive offseason, the knicks and james dolan, specifically, have chosen to spurn winning, once again, not because of money, but because of pride.... their pride, not mine, mind you.

23-year old jeremy lin, the sensational break-out point guard apparently asked for more money from the houston rockets, which the knicks took as a slight. heaven forbid an athlete that is looking to make as much money as they can. the knicks, whose MSG stock increased $600 million (according to nate silver) since lin's debut, have since decided to let jeremy lin sign with the houston rockets.

there is ONLY one way to read this latest series of events... james dolan values his pride more than he values his team, his company and his fans. i don't really care about his company but the other two things are incredibly important to me and my pride. i swore several years ago that i would never give another dollar to the knicks until i saw improvement from the management. perhaps now is the perfect time to just make a clean break of it.

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 18)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Fri, 08 Jun 2012 19:59:00 +0000

Rich is back! So Rich and Colin have gotten their mojo back. This week's podcast is not even an hour long so you can bang it out on your way to the Tufts reunion this weekend or on your way to the wedding of whoever's getting married. Please enjoy.

*We really can't stress enough how much we spoil Mad Men in this episode. If you're not caught up, don't listen until the halfway point.

0:30 - Intro

1:15 - Mad Men (and Colin is sad about the Heat) - SPOILER ALERT!!!!

24:15 - The State of The Podcast

29:05 - Michael Bloomberg, King of New York (and Medford, MA)

40:45 - Rich mourns the passing of Adam Yauch aka MCA

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_18.mp3

Don't forget to, like, "like" us on facebook. People, like, still use facebook, right? For, like, another few months, at least.

https://www.facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed

Review: Game of Thrones ("Valar Morghulis")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Wed, 06 Jun 2012 14:52:00 +0000

by richmin3000

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers in the main section as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of episode 1, "the north remembers " - here
read my review of episode 2, "the night lands" - here.
read my review of episode 3, "what is dead may never die" - here.
read my review of episode 4, "garden of bones" - here.
read my review of episode 5, "ghosts of harrenhall" - here.
read my review of episode 6, "the old gods and the new" - here.
read my review of episode 7, "a man without honor" - here.
read my review of episode 8, "the prince of winterfell" - here.
read my review of episode 9, "blackwater" - here.

"This war has just begun. It will last for years. Thousands will die at your command. You will betray the men serving you, you will betray your family, you will betray everything you once held dear...and it will all be worth it, because you are the Son of Fire, you are the Warrior of Light. You will sweep aside this pretender and that one; you will be king." - Melisandre

after last weeks' tightly focused episode, "blackwater" we returned to the usual format of checking in on every major character. at least we got an extra 10 minutes this week to squeeze it all in. for the last time this year, let's check in on our favorite westerosi....

stannis baratheon
stannis made a valiant seize on king's landing last week only to find himself back on dragonstone this week. for a second there he started to regret the choices he's made (i.e. killing his brother) that led him to this point... that is until he starred into the fire. let this be a lesson to all of you kids - don't leave behind your demon-birthing sorceress next time you want to go into battle!

character grade: c (he's sort of a dick - hard to root for him even against the terrible king joffrey)

davos seaworth
probably my favorite character from book 2, he suffered the same ill fate as stannis this past season in that neither got enough screen time to deserve any strong emotional investment. the best scene was a couple of weeks ago when stannis and davos were reminiscing over the seize of storm's end (davos smuggled food to a trapped stannis and his men) during robert baratheon's rebellion. davos' son most certainly perished in the wildfire explosion last week though davos' fate is left less certain.

character grade: b- (i just wish he got more screen time)

daenerys targaryen
dany had a very drawn out story arc this season and that's mostly because a lot of her story was trumped up for fan service. she is not a big presence in the book as her dragons are still young and weak and she is trying to find her way out of the red waste (dessert). each week we were sent off across the narrow sea to check in on dany just to hear her begging or pleading for something else (food, water, entrance into qarth, ships, dragons). finally, she was able to learn that if you want something, you have to take it - coincidentally around the same time she learned her dragons could kill on command. with some money in her pocket and 3 slightly more threatening dragons, she's one step closer to reclaiming "her" throne.

character grade: c+ (she got to be a little to whiny for my tastes - still though, dragons!)

jon snow
jon's storyline, like dany's, took a while to develop. we were stuck at craster's keep for a bit too long. then we had the whole, will they or won't they, with ygritte, before feeling like we rushed through the most important part of his story this past week. i know a lot of people don't pay attention to every line of dialogue but if you're not watching this show, like me, at least twice a week, you better be paying very close attention. a couple weeks ago, qhorin halfhand told jon that he would have to infiltrate mance rayder's wildling camp as a spy. in order to effectuate that plan, qhorin feigned distrust for jon and made sure jon was left with no choice but to kill him. it was a great plot development that would have been better served with more time to draw in the viewers's emotional investment. jon's turn to the dark side was at least aided by the fact that he actually sort of bought in to ygritte's expressions of freedom and wildling way of life.

character grade: a- (really this grade is because ygritte's constant teasing of jon was a joy to watch)

sam and the rest of the night's watch
they learned at craster's keep that mance rayder (the king beyond the wall) has gathered all the wildlings in order to march south. the reasons are unknown. it's possible they intend to attack the rest of westeros, but it's also possible that they are simply trying to escape a growing threat. speaking of that growing threat, we see, in the season finale, that the white walkers (the ones on horses - as seen above) and the wights (the zombies) are marching towards something or someones. it was an ominous scene that sort of came out of nowhere but still provided a lot of anticipation for next season (sort of like the dragons last year).

character grade: b (the night's watch is plenty fun. sam is in love with gilly. plus they found dragonglass)

theon greyjoy
from robb's right-hand-man to prodigal son to conqueror to murderer to fool. it's been quite the season for my favorite character this season (not even close to my favorite in the book). his story has been, by far, the most disheartening in an emotionally significant sort of way. his speech this last week was great even though his fate is left unknown. if you recall, robb said any iron-born could return home if they surrender, except for theon. i assume that his men accepted robb's offer, but the show has not divulged the specifics just yet so we're left to just assume (which is never the best way to go about things in this world - take note).

character grade: a+ ("and whoever kills that fucking horn blower will stand in bronze above the shores of pyke!")

bran stark
the little lord of winterfell had a tough go of it this season (not that last season was much better). he witnessed the destruction of his home (though we are left to wonder how - the greyjoys surrender yet winterfell still burns? hmmmmm) and most devastatingly, the death of his people - the commoners he swore to protect and watch over. now, he's on the move after sneakingly waiting out the greyjoys in the family tombs, with osha, hodor and rickon. though we haven't seen it recently, let's not forget about his wolf dreams either.

character grade: a- (loved seeing him, as acting lord, send the farmer two orphan boys to help him - the same boys that later were burned by theon. i'll also miss maester luwin who helped provide bran with great counsel while his entire family was away.)

robb stark
he's another character that didn't have much to do in the book so his story arc was sort of forced this season. he didn't really go on the move all that much and dealt with a lot of drama, such as theon's betrayal and his mother's betrayal (releasing jamie lannister). thank god he found someone to help him with all that kingly stress. i actually liked the love story angle between him and talissa (aka jeyne westerling) though i can't imagine it's going to be all rosy from here on out.

character grade: b+ (all his talk about trying to live up to his father's standards makes it easy to root for him)

brienne of tarth
another of my favorites from the book. brienne is everything i thought she would be and more, especially the way she swats men off of her like flies. i thought her intense sadness over renly's death was forced just as i thought her allegiance to catelyn was forced, but her interactions with jamie have been gold thus far and i expect that to be the case next season as well.

character grade: b+ (more brienne and jamie please)

arya stark
let's see... we started off the season with her on the kingsroad heading up north until she was captured and brought to harrenhall. she spent a good chunk of time swapping stories with tywin lannister and making friends with a faceless man named jaqen h'ghar. now she's back on the lamb with her friends, gendry and hot pie. it's funny that i've heard complaints about how dany's story didn't progress, even though no one has progressed less than arya, with no complaints. that's because she's simply a joy to watch.

character grade: a- (valar morghulis!!!!!!)

sansa stark
you're a woman now sansa and will need to work on your lying skills if you're going to make it out of king's landing alive. speaking of which, i thought she had left with sandor clegane (aka the hound) last week. i'm sort of confused. either way, she's no longer betrothed to king joffrey which seemed delightful until petyr baelish ruined all of her joy. now she has two suitors trying to run off with her, offering their protection services. so many great men... how will a girl choose?

character grade: b+ (she really stepped it up this year as she learned that life is not a fairytale)

petyr baelish
i'm sure some of you are wondering why i'm including littlefinger in this recap, but he is and will continue to be an important cog in this world. i like that even though varys and littlefinger did not share much screen time this year, you can tell that they are always keeping an eye out for each other. earlier this year, petyr told cersei that information was power, to which cersei replied, "power is power." you can't really argue with that. as this season has progressed, lord baelish has shown that he is a man with growing power. he brought catelyn stark the bones of her late husband and gave her the idea of releasing jamie lannister so that she could get her two girls back alive (a lie of course). littlefinger then had a little meet-n-greet with the tyrells to discuss their plans post-renly. he then went to harrenhall to discuss with tywin an alliance between the lannisters and the tyrells. and in these past two weeks, we saw the result of all of petyr's backroom dealings. tywin and sir loras tyrell saved king's landing. joffrey and margaery tyrell are set to be wed. the two richest and two of the strongest houses are united now. and as a prize, littlefinger became lord of harrenhall, a title once falsely promised to him by tyrion (during his rouse to trap maester pycelle as an informant for cersei) earlier this year.

character grade: b+ (i am currently rewatching season 3 of 'the wire' and it's great seeing this actor
portray cunning politicians on both shows)

cersei lannister
there are few, if any, characters from the book that are more detestable than cersei. joffrey is pretty awful, but he doesn't get the pages that cersei does in the books. in the show, however, i found her to be my "most improved player" from season 1 to season 2, meaning i went from hating her to really enjoying her character. this season gave her a lot of depth of motivations and allowed us to at least empathize with her a bit more than i would have ever thought possible. she loves her kids and resents being born a strong woman in a world dominated by strong men - she should start a support group with arya and brienne.

character grade: a (look on the bright side - at least 2 of your kids are decent)

tyrion lannister
everyone's favorite character i presume. theon still takes that honor for me, but that doesn't mean tywion wasn't just fantastic this year. 'a clash of kings' (aka book 2) was all about tyrion and his short lived reign as hand-of-the-king. the show did a great job fulfilling our excitement after his father, lord tywin, sent him to rule in his place at the end of season 1. tyrion was a perfect fit for a place like king's landing and he single handedly protected the capitol from stannis' army (at least he evened the odds and then prolonged the battle long enough for his father's late heroics). it's quite sad that he's now shacked up on in some room out of everyone's way now that he's no longer the hand. it's even sadder that he's getting none of the credit for saving king's landing. let's not also forget that varys tells tyrion that cersei was the one who ordered sir manden to kill him during the battle (which resulted in the large scar across his face) and now his doctor (aka maester) is the same guy he put in the dungeons earlier this season. how did things turn out so bad for tyrion all of a sudden? at least he has shae by his side.

character grade: a+ (can't wait to see the lannister family dynamic now that everyone - sans jamie - is in one place)

joffrey baratheon
i'm starting to think that the actor who plays joffrey should be nominated for an emmy due to his ability to draw universal hatred from viewers. joffrey didn't have much of a story arc this year as he did a strong character arc, which was simply about the realization that he's a complete and utter douche. i realize that last season he was pretty awful, but i feel like my emotional reaction to him this year should be reserved for people who would do harm to my immediate family - not characters on tv shows. somehow, someway, joffrey made it out of this season alive and in better shape then he left last season. his family is reunited, his enemies (stannis, robb, renly) are weaker or dead and he is set to join the great houses of lannister and tyrell by marrying margaery.

character grade: b- (a little too much joffrey being a *unt. he truly is stannis' nephew - oh wait, no he's not!)

no hyperbole allowed rating: A
i thought one of the best, if not the best, episode of the season. at 70 minutes long, it didn't feel nearly as rushed as previous episodes and i thought it did a great job leaving most of the character's stories in good places. a couple of confusing things included sansa staying in king's landing and the burning of winterfell. at least with the burning of winterfell, i think there were practical reasons, such as with casting and time, that they are going to leave that storyline for next year.

everyone's major criticism this year was that the show was too short (or that the books were too long) so that episodes felt rushed and too packed with characters. though i certainly agree, i think the showrunners did an excellent job making tough decisions and constantly bringing to the forefront and exploring the major themes from the book, like power and loyalty.

next season, the plan is to split book 3 into two 10-episode seasons, meaning that we'll have a lot more time to hang out with each character and get invested into each of their storylines. this will be important as even more characters get introduced and major plot developments occur at every turn. i can't wait!

i've been excited to guide us through season 2 of game of thrones and would appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts for next season! you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DISCUSSING BOOK 2 STUFF AND A FEW REFERENCES TO BOOK 3)

- we need more roose bolton and his bastard son, ramsay snow. roose should have been at harrenhall by now and ramsay obviously is the one who burned down winterfell, which should be a great place to start at the beginning of season 3.
- the storylines for catelyn, jamie, brienne and robb all sort of went into book 3 already so i guess we now have to deal with the riverlands, the blackfish and edmure tully (cat's brother). i assume that season 3 will end with the red wedding because honestly, how could it not. i already can't stop thinking about it since i definitely shed at least one tear when it happened in the book and almost punched a wall.
- we'll also meet the brotherhood without banners and the brave companions which should add a whole new level of pain and gore.
- the reed children have officially been cast as characters so that should be sick.
- dany building an army will be awesome.
- the politics of king's landing, the anti-tyrion backlash and the whole jon as a wildling storyline are all amazing too.

i'm getting a little too worked up even thinking about this. it's time for me to go and read book 5! see you all next year.

Review: Game of Thrones ("Blackwater")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Thu, 31 May 2012 13:00:00 +0000

by richmin3000

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers in the main section as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of episode 1, "the north remembers " - here
read my review of episode 2, "the night lands" - here.
read my review of episode 3, "what is dead may never die" - here.
read my review of episode 4, "garden of bones" - here.
read my review of episode 5, "ghosts of harrenhall" - here.
read my review of episode 6, "the old gods and the new" - here.
read my review of episode 7, "a man without honor" - here.
read my review of episode 8, "the prince of winterfell" - here.

last year's penultimate episode was "baelor" (the one where ned loses his head) so thrones had a lot to live up to with sunday nite's "blackwater" penned by author, george r.r. martin. though it mostly succeeded, this latest episode suffered through some of the same problems this 2nd season has in general.

"i'm a lannister. i dont' have a choice in all of this" - tyrion lannister

king's landing
we kept our focus this week in king's landing which was a great decision by the powers-that-be since it's been quite annoying getting superficial check-ins on many of the characters each week (like last week's completely insignificant scene between dany and sir jorah mormont). it would be great if the show could spend more time with each character when their storylines come up even if it is more infrequent.

between season 1 and season 2, the world of game of thrones has grown exponentially. in season 1, we were introduced to the starks, baratheons, lannisters, targaryens, night's watchmen and visited places like winterfell, king's landing, the wall and dothrak. in this season, not only have we added the tyrells and greyjoys, but we've added qarth, pyke, harrenhall, dragonstone, not to mention the great landscape north of the wall. and though we still mostly follow the starks, baratheons and lannisters, their respective families are splintered and on separate paths, which means even more storylines to keep up with.

although this depth of world creation is certainly an impressive feat on paper, it's much harder to accomplish in the medium of television, especially when the books are 800 pages each and presented with each chapter in a different character's point of view. the tv show, on the other hand, consists of 10 50-minute episodes, rather than the full length 12 on hbo (or even 13 back in the day). if this were network tv, we'd be talking about at least 20 42-minute long episodes (like lost).

this creates not problems, but difficult choices. the writers are forced to slash a minor character here, a minor storyline there. in some ways, it actually makes for a more enjoyable viewing experience since many parts of the books spend time world building rather than pursuing action. still though, there are some characters and storylines that are necessary in order to preserve the integrity of the books. and even if we focus solely on the necessary, the show can still feel, at times, overburdened. the writers are forced to remind us each week that dany is still worried about her dragons or that jon is still trying to prove his worth or that catelyn is still trying to keep her family intact and safe. it's almost as if the writers are given a checklist each week and sometimes the scenes feel as though we are running through that checklist.

what keeps the show unique and fascinating though is it's use of dialogue and subtext. the writers often put two or more characters in a setting while they discuss what the status is of their situation or comment on the situation of others. it gives us the writers an opportunity for exposition and the audience an opportunity to discover each character's motivations and personalities.

this week's episode was a microcosm of this entire season thus far. the battle of blackwater bay is a momentous event in 'a clash of kings' and the culmination of a lot of character's story arcs throughout book 2. tyrion spent the entire book using his intelligence and loyalty to the lannister name to protect the gates of king's landing. in the book, he secretly built a long chain link fence that he then laid underwater at the mouth of blackwater bay. when all or most of stannis' ships had passed through the mouth, tyrion raised the fencing behind them to trap them and then proceeded to set all the ships ablaze with wildfire.

on the show, tyrion's plan was much more simplistic but still very smart. he sent one ship unmanned towards the baratheon fleet leaking wildfire along the way until it was too late for anyone to escape. the shot of bronn's arrow flying through the nite sky to set the green fire ablaze was breathtaking.

yet, as soon as the battle started, things started to fall apart within the episode structurally speaking. the first few scenes were great at setting up the tension right before the start of fighting. the women were in maegar's holdfast keeping safe, tyrion and joffrey took their place atop the castle walls. davos seaworth and his son led the baratheon fleet into the calm waters of blackwater bay. it all felt so tense. we were given an opportunity to let it all sink in. once the fighting started, however, it felt more like we had to get through the checklist once again.

stannis charges foward. check. the hound leads the ground defenses. check. the hound gets scared by fire and retreats. check. tyrion leads the counter-assualt. check. podrick payne saves tyrion's life from an attack by a kingsguard knight. check. more baratheon men storm the castle. check. tywin and the tyrells save the day. check.

obviously i'm exaggerating and the scenes between cersei and sansa and later on, with cersei and her son, tommen, provided much needed emotional depth. but it doesn't help that the battle sequence looked like it took place on a 50 yard field in front of one (of many, i assume) particular gate (yes, the mud gate which tyrion predicted last week. though only so that hbo could save money by not having the battle take place over several different locations). just to get back to an earlier point. one main reason the show is only 10 episodes is because hbo can't really afford (loose use of the term) to make more episodes. it is already the most expensive show on tv. that's also the reason we don't get more battle scenes (even though we don't get a lot in the book either) and why, in this episode, the battle takes place in front of a lone gate.

don't get me wrong. this episode was money well spent, but it would be foolish not to look at the financial restrictions in place when talking about this episode's structural faults. if hbo had a limitless budget, we'd probably be talking about at least 13 episodes and the battle of blackwater bay would probably take up 2 of those episodes; the first of which could end with tyrion getting slashed in the face fading to black. we would spend the second episode dealing with lord tywin and loras tyrell's late heroics which seemed quite rushed and very confusing here. all of a sudden, a host of men started charging forward. besides one shot of the lannister banner in crimson red, there was no way of telling whether they were on stannis' side or the lannister's side. then all of a sudden tywin rushes into the throne room to inform cersei that they were victorious.

the battle of blackwater bay is the climax of this season because at the end of the day, everyone is fighting over the iron throne which is in king's landing, not in winterfell, not beyond the wall and certainly not in qarth. yet, even with a fully dedicated episode, the battle seemed rushed and not as epic as i would have hoped.

no hyperbole allowed rating: B+
though i spend a great deal criticizing some of the show's limitations, there were a lot of great moments from this episode as there always are. my criticisms are almost always about the rushed plot developments but rarely do i criticize the moments with each character as they contemplate their positions in life. cersei with the grand maester receiving the poison. sansa leading the noble women in a hymn. the hound talking about a world built by killers. tyrion fully realizing his potential as a leader of men. these are the things that make this show great.

i also loved the shot by director neil marshall of the battering ram knocking against the mud gates - the camera just focused on the sculpted eye of the battering ram as it rocked back and forth. it was very cinematic.

i'm excited to guide us through season 2 of game of thrones so would appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts as we move forward. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 2)

- i wonder if dany found her dragons yet?
- i was really curious to see how they were going to deal with tyrion's battle wound, which, of course, was much more graphic in the book. i assumed it would be impossible or at least impracticable to have his entire nose removed but a gash on his cheek seems a bit light.
- i can't wait to see cersei get all the credit next week for saving king's landing instead of tyrion. the days of tyrion's reign as hand are sadly over.
- not many more spoilers i can add since we're close to the end of book 2 and anything else i'd have to add would spoil events that are dealt with in book 3.
- i did read online that the swamp kids will be cast for season 3 so i'm pretty sure that bran will have some new companions moving forward. i am very excited for that.

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 17)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Wed, 30 May 2012 13:00:00 +0000

17 episodes...that's a lot.

Rich wasn't able to take part in this week's podcast due to his full legal docket and law school reunion at Geraldo's bar. He's pretty busy these days, so if you'd like to be a guest host, feel free to submit a YouTube video with something interesting and thought-provoking, and who knows, maybe you can be world famous like Rich and Colin.

This week, Colin welcomes his old high school buddy (prep school chum, really), Dan Hughes. Dan is on the podcast to discuss the recent debate over gay marriage and President Obama's show of support, as well as the harsh reaction that people had to both the president's decision, in the form of opposition, and the animosity shown to the state of North Carolina by gay marriage supporters.

Dan's kind of an expert because he's very smart, very well educated (at the US Congress' Page Program, Portsmouth Abbey, Harvard College, and Georgetown Law) and pretty gay, so it's kind of like when we talk about black people stuff and invite our black friends on. Or when we ask Rich about Jeremy Lin since it rhymes with "Min." Or when we talk about Irish-Cuban-English-Italian issues and consult with Colin.

Topics include Dan's background, geopolitics, US history, European history, the law, gay marriage referenda, President Obama's "evolving" positions, the state of the Republican Party, Islamofascism and terrorism, and some other stuff. It's fairly clear from listening that Dan is smarter than Colin and that's ok with Colin.

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_17.mp3

To support Dan's AIDSWalk fund drive, please click here. Even though he already did it, you can still donate.

Review: Game of Thrones ("The Prince of Winterfell")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Mon, 28 May 2012 01:45:00 +0000

by richmin3000

Review: Game of Thrones ("A Man Without Honor")

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Tue, 15 May 2012 03:09:00 +0000

by richmin3000

*my reviews/recaps will not have any spoilers in the main section as they relate to future events but will have many explanations or clarifications of events currently happening on the screen so if you want to figure it out for yourself, read with caution.

**due to several recommendations, i will be discussing some spoilery stuff at the tail end of the review so please pay careful attention.

read my review of episode 1, "the north remembers " - here.
read my review of episode 2, "the night lands" - here.
read my review of episode 3, "what is dead may never die" - here.
read my review of episode 4, "garden of bones" - here.
read my review of episode 5, "ghosts of harrenhall" - here.
read my review of episode 6, "the old gods and the new" - here.

"do you know what legacy means? it's what you pass down to your children. and your children's children. it's what remains of you when you're gone." - lord tywin lannister

tywin's great definition of legacy, above, helps us to better understand what drives many of the characters in this show. later on in this episode, cersei will advise sansa that it's better not to love anyone, besides your own children (which she admits is not a choice), as love forces us to make illogical choices, that, in the end, only serve to harm ourselves. such is life in westeros if you choose to play the game of thrones.

king's landing

there was no joffrey this week but even so, he seemed to be on everyone's mind. after rudely rebuffing sansa's courtesies, the hound leaves her with a reminder that in the future, he will be the only one standing between her and her abusive future husband, king joffrey.

sansa gets one step closer to that brutal future i just mentioned when she finally has her first period. time to make the babies! this leads to a great scene between cersei and sansa where cersei offers her some advice about love and children (see above) which seems to have worked wonders in her case (see below).

cersei and tyrion share a rare moment of sibling affection as cersei regrets the horrible king joffrey has become. as cersei casually admits to having bed jamie (wondering where joffrey got his evil genes from - look in the mirror), tyrion tries to comfort her by acknowledging how sweet her other two children (myrcella and tommen) are.

iron island/pyke
theon and yara are off fighting their respective battles so no action on the island this week.

winterfell
oh theon theon theon. what are we gonna do with you? last week the episode started off with theon's conquest of winterfell. this week, we start of with theon waking up in bed to the realization that he's just been hoodwinked. bran, rickon, osha and hodor are on the lamb with a big bag of walnuts.

theon does his best to try and track down the boys. in the end, he manages to track down two boys... we just don't know if they are bran and rickon. in the aftermath of this latest snafu theon is realizing that there is no middle ground anymore... he's made his bed and has to lay in it. if he wants to be his father's son, he can't show the same sympathies his foster father, ned stark, once showed him.

in the backdrop, there is a race, of sorts, between yara (theon's sister) and ramsay snow (roose bolton's bastard son - roose bolton is robb's bannerman who keeps talking about how there are too many lannister prisoners) to see who's gonna make it to winterfell first. as ned stark once declared, winterfell can hold off an attack with 500 men. it seems that whoever gets there first will be in the position of strength. theon's conquest will become meaningless unless his sister can get there quickly.

stormlands
no stannis this week though we hear from tyrion that he has set sail for king's landing and should be there in four or five days.

harrenhall
again, the scenes between tywin and arya are some of the best this show has ever done. they bring out the best in each other because neither one is able to get the better of the other and they both obviously have respect for one another. the scenes are also a great opportunity to get some exposition and backstory.

this week, we hear about aegon's conquest of westeros 300 years ago. he and his two sisters rode in on the backs of dragons burning down the land, including harrenhall. we also hear tywin send the mountain, gregor clegane, off to burn the surrounding lands in an attempt to figure out who is trying to kill him. hint: probably everyone.

the main suspects are the 'brotherhood without banners'. they are an outlaw group that tywin's men have been apparently having problems with. you're not supposed to know who they are even though they've been mentioned a few times, but i can assure you that the leader of said group appeared in season 1. it's not a spoiler and it's not something you need think about at this point so when it comes up in the future, i will provide a fuller explanation.

robb stark's camp
robb is off to receive some random lord's surrender but i'm sure it's just an excuse to get some quality time with the hot nurse.

we finally get the return of jamie lannister and he does not disappoint. he's such a dick but also so cocky and witty that it's really hard to hate him (unlike joffrey who is annoying and incapable - the lesson being that it's acceptable to be an ass if you can do it well and with some charm). this week, he kills his own cousin, kills lord karstark's son, escapes from prison, gets captured again and tells catelyn stark that he has more honor than her late, cheating husband.

it's obvious that jamie in this captive state can not endure. he's either going to escape or be killed. he's too much trouble just to keep around in chains and robb's bannermen are getting restless.

beyond the wall
jon jon jon. it seems like there are a lot of incapable men this episode though in jon's case, i can sort of empathize. i mean, ygritte is really a master temptress. i don't know how jon held off like he did and in the end he got captured by wildlings. he should have done it while he had the chance. there's nothing worse than dying a virgin in the cold. trust me, i know.

qarth
it was the butler with the frying pan in the library. no no, that's not it. it was mr. ducksauce and warlock dean pelton with the knives in the house of the undying. something like that. not quite but hopefully you get the picture. mr. ducksauce conspires with warlock dean pelton to murder the rest of the 13. what this has to do with dany's dragons is a bit of a mystery since the writers have chosen to completely depart from the book's storyline. my guess is that they have taught the dragons how to multiplicity themselves.

no hyperbole allowed rating: A-
another great episode as the show moves towards season two's climax. unlike last week's episode, this week featured many fewer deaths and a lot more character development through one-on-one dialogue. cersei and sansa, cersei and tyrion, tywin and arya, jamie and cousin, jon and ygritte. this week featured some of the best writing in either season and it should come as no surprise as the showrunners, db weiss and david benioff, scripted this episode themselves.

i'm excited to guide us through season 2 of game of thrones so would appreciate any comments or feedback to help structure these posts as we move forward. you can write to me at nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com, or via twitter @hyperboleNOT, or on our wall on facebook at facebook.com/nohyperboleallowed, or just write something in the comments section below.

****SPOILER SECTION**** (DO NOT READ AHEAD UNLESS YOU'VE READ THROUGH BOOK 2)

-this is barely a spoiler but obviously bran and rickon are not dead as every single one of my friends has already realized. theon would not have felt the need to tar the dead boys unless he was trying to hide their identities. the not-so-obvious effects will be, however, cat's and robb's reactions to the news.
- i'm starting to really worry about the fact that bran and rickon are not separated by now. i'm only through book 4 but i have still not heard one word about rickon since he left winterfell. does this mean that he is truly insignificant or that he and bran will reconnect soon or that, in the show, they've decided to completely change their storylines. this wouldn't surprise me since they've decided to leave out the swamp kids.
- speaking of catelyn, i had to pause this week's episode after cat drew her sword on jamie. i assumed that she would be releasing him but have read reviews that make the assumption that she will cut of his hand in this scene. i don't think that will happen. i'm also starting to realize that the starks lack some strategic intelligence or perhaps they are just too trusting.
- i'm so curious to see what happens with theon in the next couple of episodes and how ramsay snow is portrayed. having not read book 5, i still don't know what happened to theon even though i never assumed he died. i've since learned that he has not.
- i'm also very excited to see jon interact with the wildlings which i was mentioned last week. i'm a big fan of jon's story arc and i wonder if the actor playing him can live up to challenge.
- i know that dany's story isn't that interesting in book 2 but i feel like they've spiced it up for all the wrong reasons on the show. i like warlock dean pelton as much as the next guy but i would have rathered them spend more time on westeros than in qarth in retrospect.

Podcast: No Hyperbole Allowed (Episode 16)

nohyperboleallowed@gmail.com (Richard Min and Colin Patrick O'Higgins) — Fri, 11 May 2012 13:00:00 +0000

Remember us? We were just playing hard-to-get and it worked because you're reading this and soon are about to listen to this.

After a 24-day delay mostly due to Colin's personal emergency (Seriously, don't ask. And no, it's not weird to grow a extra fingers suddenly at age 33) and marginally due to Rich's decision to go "find himself" backing in Europe, we are back and better than ever. (Warning: this sentence contains hyperbole. Please proceed with caution.)

This week, Rich and Colin get reacquainted and what better way to do that than by talking politics. After that, we actually talk about something we agree on... our love for Mad Men.

1:06 - Intro (US mini-series = English series; Hi Bobby!; Teasing Topics)
5:30 - USPS or UPS? (Colin goes postal)
9:00 - National Correspondent's Dinner; Is the Daily Show a news show?
16:05 - Musings on Mitt Romney
20:15 - Colin's ideal Presidential candidate (Hint: Must be Hot)
27:20 - Rich is not a fan of Gore v. Bush or the Electoral College
43:35 - Presidential Politics
55:30 - Colin wants to watch 'Game of Thrones' instead of 'Magic City'
58:00 - Men go Mad for Mad Men (sorry, I'm tired)
1:21:30 - Men are from Earth, Women are from....
1:24:20 - Outro

http://traffic.libsyn.com/nohyperbole/No_Hyperbole_Allowed_Episode_16.mp3

Here's video of the White House Correspondents' Dinner, as promised by Colin. After watching Jimmy Kimmel's opening, you can find a link to the President's remarks. Very funny stuff, but only if you watch the news and follow politics and current events. They don't call it "Nerd Prom" for nothing.