nothing.

because pez

2005-06-27T08:22:00.000-07:00

hmm where do i start. so much happened during the last week of holidays.

mon: cant remember

tues: sec3's came over, had tuition then went for some late night shit

wed: er went to serenes to study with.. dan clio sebas germ

thurs: wheeee bbq!! er sebas jus por dea kelly germ came over. then sebas and justin stayed over. slept super late like abt 3.

fri: yay! bbq again!! lol this time class bbq. was super fun lah. 3 people got thrown into the pool unwillingly. but the later part like 11pm most of us changed and swam. the wholeplace was superpacked.

saturday/sunday: usual stuff

so yes.. somehow im not really hit by the school is starting thing on the weekend. everyone was so aarrgh. but i guess i didnt really bother to think much about it. so school just came and it was like normal. today was super slack, double chinese and double pe. the only real lesson we had was the last period math.

heres some other pointers

- life is bad but theres no point complaining about it.
- no one likes a smart ass
- and ermm. oh shit i need to sleep!!! aaahhhhhh

boom

2005-06-19T10:05:00.000-07:00

human geog is so boring. you can actually feel depressed staring and flipping through the thick marianne chong book.

oh btw ignite was quite fun/good. i expected it to be really crappy and boring.. okay maybe the workshops were kind of boring. but overall it was fun. and the best part was like camp, i didnt have time to stop and think. the instant i got home it was always a rush to go bathe do stuff then slp.. i didnt even turn on my com at all for those 3 days. so yea when i finally got home on fri night.. i didnt have to rush to bathe and slp early. thats when stuff started getting a little screwedup again when i had time to sit down and stone. so i guess i perform better overall if im going constantly. you give me a while to stone and do nth i really lose momentum and just stop functioning and start getting a little emotional and shit lol.

okay i just realised prelims is in about 1 month plus. so here comes study mania again. cya all of the june hols.. while i cramp myself in my room this whole week. it will be study mania room camp.

story of the year

2005-06-12T09:29:00.000-07:00

here i am

pouring my heart out

unto these rooftops

just a ghost to the world

thats exactly what i need

forever never ever land

2005-06-10T08:04:00.000-07:00

wheeeeeeeeeeeeeee.. taking back sunday is just the best.. if the vid works for you. its your photograph is proof by yea tbs. and oh btw just double click on the video. it will look a lot better and not cut off

today was quite normal. marcus came over for lunch. then went swimming for a while. then went gym and helped marcus get erm fitter? lol.. yea then went on for lcell then adam hawker for dinner. then he came back to my place. watched some ending half of a movie then cabbed back.

internet lag is the most annoying thing on earth.. besides computer malfunctions.

101011010110111010100100010010010101011010110100100100100101101101101011010
010010101101101101000101011011011010010010101101101101001001001011011011001
001001010110110110110101001011011011011011011010010010001001001001011011011
01101101001000100100101011101101101110110110100100100100010010010010010101
10110110111011011011010010010001001001001000100100100100101011011011011011
1011011101101101010001001001001000101011011011011101101101110110110111111101
101101101101110101001000100

and thats binary for nooo dont let me resort to playing stupid internet games.

so long and thanks for all the fish

2005-06-07T07:37:00.000-07:00

so long and thanks for all the fish
so sad that it should come to this
we tried to warn you but.. oh dear

you may not share our intellect
that may explain your disrespect
for all the natural wonders that grow around you

so long so long and thanks for all the fish

your worlds about to be destroyed
theres no point getting all annoyed
lie back and let the world dissolve

whooooo.. haha hitchhikers guide to the galaxy was nice .. if you didnt find it nice. its because you prob had noidea what or why you were watching a movie you didnt know was about.. haha indeed. the meaning of life is 42 lol.

dumb

2005-06-06T05:34:00.000-07:00

wanted to try one of this quiz crap so i chose this one because you dont have to write anything.

snuck out of the house

gotten lost in a city

seen a shooting star

had a serious surgerygone

out in public in my pajamas

kissed a stranger

hugged a stranger

been in a fist fight

been arrested

laughed and had milk/coke come out of my nose

pushed all the buttons on an elevator

swore at my parents

been in love

been close to love

been to a casino

been skydiving

broken a bone

been high

skinny-dipped

skipped school

flashed someone

seen a therapist

played spin the bottle

gotten stitches

drank a whole gallon of milk/water in one hour

bitten someone

been to Disneyland

gotten the chicken pox

kissed a member of the same sex

crashed into a friend's car

been to Japan

ridden in a taxi

shoplifted

been fired

had a crush on someone of the same sex

had feelings for someone who didn't have them back

stolen something from my school

gone on a blind date

lied to a friend

had a crush on a teacher

celebrated mardi-gras in new orleans

been to Europe

slept with a co-worker

been married

gotten divorced

had children

seen someone die

had a close friend die -thank God, no.

been to Africa

driven over 400 miles in one day

been to Canada

been to Mexico

been on a plane

seen the Rocky Horror Picture Show

thrown up in a bar

purposely set a part of myself on fire –

eaten Sushi

been snowboarding and skiing

met someone in person from the internet

lost a child

gone to college

graduated college

done hard drugs

tried killing myself

fired a gun

purposely hurt myself

taken painkillers

miss someone right now

tried to wash away some feelings by banging myself on the wall

mess

2005-06-04T08:31:00.000-07:00

doink. i think thats a good word to describe my life now. doink. shiit im so bored. theres nth to look forward to. this sucks man,...

im supposed to be studying and stuff. ive just been playing and not doing any real work. i know i have to freaking study geog. but sec4 geog is just soooo boring. aahh.

and i need to study hist + ss. but they are both equally as boring... no wait. hist isnt that bad. ss sucks!!!

yea i know im just grumbling on and on and on and its really boring for you to read but oh well.. the past week i must admit has been quite fun. todays saturday was really useless. all i got was twisted lies and a broken heart.

nah im just kidding. im pretty heartless so yea. lol. damn why isnt anyone freakingonline now. i may actually resort to playing the lame helicopter game now on my com.

im in such a complain/whine mood now. because there is no one to talk to. `LIFE SUCKS SHIT.. for the mean time. until someone talks to me and brings me out of this boredom and saves me from a tear in the fabric of space time that has tossed me into this blackhole leading into the nexus of string dimensions and ultimately save me from a transdimensional death.

oh does anyone know anything about the string theory. its really cool. go read up on it.

random thought: habbo hotel is the dumbest thing ever.

phoenix ignition

2005-05-26T05:56:00.000-07:00

im so bored. i have no idea what to write about because all ive been doing for the past few days is staying at home and rotting... im supposed to be studying.. realised that when u train physically, either by running or doing exercises and crap, you actually get a lot mentally stronger.. because when it comes to pushing hard for exercising, it comes to a point where your mind just says okay you've reached your limit. but in true fact its far from the limit.. beyond that point its purely mental, whether you can continue to push and run that next few steps. when you run for really long distances, every single steps feels like death or something. it feels worse than suffocating because your body really cant get any more oxygen so its as good as holding your breath doing nothing..

but what the crap am i talking abt anyway. i havent ran for so freaking long. since nafa. i think i only ran once. no real exercise since then.. unless you consider swimming exercise. and when i mean swimming i dont mean laps. i mean playing around in the pool with friskbees and floats with other people.

whoosh i have absolutely nothing else to say. but i am so bored because i just spent the whole day at home doing nothingf im just continuing to type without anything to type about in my mind. oh mae is good band. and june hols coming. but i got 2 extra fking weeks of school. and i lost my fking pencil box. im so depressed i dont wanna study anymore.

oh and starwars theme songs are really good. they're so... starwars.

july

2005-05-23T23:58:00.000-07:00

july. remembering old fun times really sucks. shit missed last year quite badly. esp my old house and the times where we wld rollerblade or cycle down to serene at night through botanics and tyersall. just visited my old house and the area around it. like great world city. my old mall. remembering all the funny memories i had there since i was a kid. opened when i was in p1 or p2 i think..

sucks moving out from a place when you've been staying there your whole entire life. when your walking around orchard it feels like your home area but then its not.

somehow im having doubts to whether studying hard is worth it. in the end our goal is to graduate from uni when we're 20 plus with a degree. but nowadays so many uni grads find it hard to get good jobs too..

isnt it like kind of ironic to die on your birthday. anyway june is coming soon. all you non sec4's/j2's will be having fun and all that. damn.. i wanna quit school and work in an oil rig or something. or sign up for some special forces thing.. or go to japan and learn how to be a ninja. watching war movies makes you feel like being a civilian is just being a weak piece of crap.

nothing

2005-05-19T08:26:00.000-07:00

lolz honestly its quite amusing to see kids acting deep..

ah shit what am i talking about im still sort of considered a kid.

anyway starwars. was really good. why? because it really hit above my expectations. i mean they had to cram sooo much in 1 single 2 hr plus movie. the whole freaking storyline changes so dramatically. from jedi council to the sith taking over and the entire empire being formed plus death star. anakin turning to darth vader. the wookies part. the birth of luke and leia. if you watch ep 4,5,6 you'l understand that theres a lot of changes. i expected some parts to be left hanging in the air and stuff. but it was all really well done. plus it was like conttinuous visual effects lah. shit must have taken a lot of cash. considering george lucas funded the whole thing himself. and yes! lolz the soundtrack.. was so cool. they played all the original starwars tunes that were kind of remixed a little to fit the scenes.and they played the exact same tune for the ending part at tatooine. and i still think corsucant is just way too damn big... and yes go watch 4,5,6 opf you havent! otherwise your not a real starwars fan. 4, 5,6 were the orignal ones!!! forever a classic.

shietza

2005-05-18T06:58:00.000-07:00

ahh fks man my pencil box is really gone forever........ i will miss you.. and so is my dear calculator ( not really mine, my tuition teacher exchanged them during my exam because i prefered hers, then after the exam i never called her back and eventually fired her). but still!! ahhh..

nooo your not smart! im just stupid. so stop growing your dumbass egos.. once again that was random and not targetted at anyone specifically but then again i dont really care if you feel hurt by it you sensitive pieces of shit.

am i growing crazy? or just stupid..influence of the evil guitar pick!! the moon hangs like a blade of an axe tonight.. whats with terraforming mars anyway.

starwars

2005-05-17T04:23:00.001-07:00

good news.

powerball fixed
watched starwars ep 3!! sooo nice. yet super sad.

bad news.

ahh i freaking lost my pencil box. my calculator is gone!! aahhh.

starwars

2005-05-17T04:23:00.000-07:00

good news.

powerball fixed
watched starwars ep 3!! sooo nice. yet super sad.

bad news.

ahh i freaking lost my pencil box. my calculator is gone!! aahhh.

darkness

2005-05-14T09:08:00.000-07:00

greeted home by a gate leading to a pitch black haunted looking house.. rain pouring down and only lightning to light my way.. lolz was shit ass scary man.. i tihnk a blackout caused the front lights to go out. was total darkness. and the freaky continuous lightning flashes didnt help either. so glad to be in the safety of my room. phew.

anyway today was quite okay. after svc just talked to the crescent pple until germ and marcus came. then dan yeow and the sec 3's came. the sec1's were just running around the whole time doing stuff. so yea then met up with dea and por and sebas and pple after that. then called a cab and went home cos it was pouring like crazy.

now here i am feeling depressed because im looking at my friends powerball with the fking cord stuck inside. shiiitt..this sucks.

yay i topped level english. but it was so freaking tyco. english marks are never stable. just pure chance on how well you do. did quite okay for the rest of my subs. actually only for science and emath. sort of got a1 for those 4 subs. but nooooo. i screwed up amath and humans. amath 21/40. fk.. geog b4... ss=13/25 screw ss... hist= 18/25. yay!! overall ss/hist= 15.5/25.. B4 i think..

my report bk will still end up looking like shit cos my common test1 results were really bad. noo..

im sorry i failed you powerball.

tagboard

2005-05-11T05:30:00.000-07:00

oh the tagboard thing is up already. post something pple. even though there are very little pple who actually read this non-public blog.

im still here

2005-05-10T06:48:00.000-07:00

You've seen the ashes in my heart

You smile the widest when I cry inside and my insides blow apart

I tried to wear another face

Just to make you proud,

just to make you put me in my place

let the bodies hit the floor

2005-05-09T07:09:00.000-07:00

aahhh i finally "fixed" my dumbass shit monitor. the thing cldnt work for like half an hour and i was like continuously checking all the switches and shit and everything was all perfect!! i just kept switching my com on and off and switching the power on and of for like half an hr..i was like already suffering from quite a bad headache.. i got so damn pissed i was cursing like shit seriously. i was like what the fking hell is wrong with hp monitors they should all just screw up in their factories and burn in hell. i was soo aaargghh.. i started punching my monitor a bit and i like pressed the on button like 62530265274125 times and still no light went on.. yea finally switched off the switch again and started to hit it. and when i turned it back on it finally worked. like finally man. i deserve some kind of patience award for not burning up monitor.

s0 anyway besides that life is good. i think i passed amath so that is gd. my monitor better not freaking screw up again or im seriously gonna call the hp guy to come down to my house and fix it on the spot.

-non impt note. i like eating fish

because blood doesnt really splatter that way

2005-05-06T07:22:00.000-07:00

I see the parts but not the whole
I study saints and scholars both
No perfect plan unfurls
Do I trust my heart or just my mind
Why is truth so hard to find in this world
Yeah in this world

Cause I am due for a miracle
I'm waiting for a sign
I'll stare straight into the sun
And I won't close my eyes
Till I understand or go blind

great song by thrice- stare at the sun..

please dont rain tomorrow.. i want to swim.

yes experience is a name people give their mistakes.

but anyway i finished common tests. ive run out of blog juice. im so blank on what to write..

yea but its quite funny anyway that everyone thinks they are so smart.
ive acknowledged the fact that im just prob an average thinker who likes to think about retarded stuff on a regular basis. but then.. there are these screwed up people who think they are really deep and smart.. they think that woah they can think so freaking far and nobody understands them because they are beyond everyone elses thinking.. its sort of works for cunning too.. you may think your the most cunning scheming asshole and no one else can ever outsmart you and your thinking way beyond anyone else. but then again your being played but someone else even more cunning. so bottomline is, dont always think that your so deep and your thinking is beyond others, just because people dont show it like some of you do doesnt mean they're shallow minded. it really shows your the weak one..

swimming is fun people. i just love the water. even if it means just floating around and relaxing underwater. just feels so at home. but i still suck at swimming fast no matter how often i swim. so crappy. think my technique is screwed up. anyway its a fri night so i'l have to go eat some mangos.. have fun kids and dont waste your life away.

skeptics and true believers

2005-04-26T07:29:00.000-07:00

wow howie day's collide is so popular already, i can remember the times where i tried introducing people the song, but like not many people liked it, then now its on the radio, suddenly eevverryonnee likes it.

anyway hows life, hows you, okay shit im getting dumb.. so people stop trying to act smart! because that would inevitably mean your very own destruction! im telling you the truth because if you try to act smart. people will hate you! muahahaha. then it would lead to a destruction of a nexus of an entire dimensional vortex that is stuck in an electron in a never ending parallel fold of warped universes stuck and bounded by the curse of their very own existing law of the space time continuum... nooooo so you wouldnt want to act smart now riight?? because you never know when your big ass mouth would lead to a rip in the very fabric of space time.. or cause your very own sub-atomic molecules to simultaneously disapear for no apparent reason...

yes you have guessed it right... i have been ionised!. what the crap does that mean anyway. like those stupid adverts or shops along the street that have salt crystals that are meant to "ionise" the air. someone explain to me. anyway im gonna try fix doodle board. and kill you if i have to.

nahh im just kidding. no really.. damn the academy is is a damn nice band.. ask for song if you wanna hear.. random event generators are suprisingly extremely extremely complicated. who would expect a stupid machine that randomly gives out numbers like 100101101010101001010101001010101001010111 where there is a random chance of 1 or a 0 appearing would be so complicated. eventually the numbers would balance up producing a nice average y=x graph.

hands down

2005-04-20T03:09:00.000-07:00

just got back from tuition. now i have it like 4 times a week. what have i gotten myself into. anyway im gonna start preparing to leave for hv. i have to get the cake and stuff for deas suprise party lol. although it wont be so suprising if she reads this. i highly doubt so cos im typing this at 6 and it starts at 7. besides shes prob at work or something..

for second interhouse games gonna play soccer.. so dumb. actually wanted to join track. but my fren just went to put my name on thelist with him. so yea. ended up in soccer. just gonna slack and be sick or somehting. hopefully my team wins then i get a free medal. muaha.

deaf or death

2005-04-16T10:03:00.000-07:00

lolz life feels like shit at 1 am on a wasted saturday night. one of the few times where i feel freaking depressed for apparent reason. or at least a small stupid reason. aaarrgghh life sucks.. dont grow up to be emo teenagers cos they are really annoying.. so contridicting i know. this fucking sucks..

nafa or napfa?

2005-04-15T08:17:00.000-07:00

anyway did my 5 stations for napfa or nafa today whatever u call it.. first station was sit ups.this one was the easiest lah.. been doing sit ups every other night or something, so no sweat, managed to get abt 52, then cheated score was 55.. haha everyone cheats sit ups in barker. even if its quite high already.. cos the teachers are so blur..

so anyway next station.. standing broad jump, one of my trumps lolz.. so yea first attempt, 261.. " you double jumped that" thats what the woman said haha so crappy, so she didnt count it.. i did it again, 255. like aargh. okay.. next attempt.. 270!! then ahh pushed to far so i fell backwards lolz. so not counted again.. my last attempt was 250.. so yea over all standing broad jump was 255.. wish i cld pass some points over cos its quite over the A of 237cm..

and the next station was? sit and reach.. been stretching quiiite a little bit. but still knew i was gonna do quite badly. but amazingly, pushed all the way until i cld feel my thigh on the verge of cramping. so yea manged to get 42.5!! muahah note the (.5)! okay i know to you average flexi pple ure like huh?? doesnt that kinda suck.. but yes knowing me. i always do like shit for sit and reach so yea. managed to get B!.. so far my score was AAB.. i could feel doom coming. smell the mortality of happiness. chin ups were next.

yea my most dreaded station. i really dont know why i cant do chin ups. i have no problem at all with inclined pull ups. managed to get 32 last yr (lolz purposely 1 more just to beat kev cos i think he got 31).. during practise times i usually dont push myself really hard i and only get abt 1 chin up plus! haha so crappy.. anyway yea. got on the bar. and the woman told me to swing there and not start instantly. so yea i did it and she said go. managed to do the first one with ease, got a bit of momentum and did another one.. then i felt the strain so i hanged for a while. and pulled up one more.. at this point was really tired already, hanged there a bit more cos i lost momentum, and struggled for the 4th one. then once again hung there for a while. the last one was really kind of a miracle. just willpowered myself to pullup one more time. and barely managed to do it. so ended up with 5 chinups. most people wld say its quite crappy and stuff. but really to me was a great achievement even though i ended up with a C. cos i thought i only cld do 2..

my final station. this one i knew i could do quite well.. shuttle run. i finally realised why i did so badly the past few years. cos of my totally no grip shitty school shoes.so today i brought proper shoes.. to get A was abt 10.1 or something yea ran then ran the thing and when i came back was like something .2... i was like what? 10.2? quite happy in my mind already, then he said 9.2.. was like so shocked lah. cos past 2 years been doing 11 secs plus. so i realised that wearing proer shoes reeeaallyy helped. so was really happy with this..

yea so total was AAABC quite satisfied. hah wished i could pass some points oveerr to my chin ups and sit and reach. esp from my sit ups. got so much extra points. and generally from the other A's.. argh have to live with the ugly C. lolz. so now for 2.4 all i need is a C to get gold i think. but im aiming for at least a B. around 11 mins. really hope i can get 11 plus. quite unfit still thought i improved a lot since beginning of the year.

yea other than nafa, if anyone like wants to clarify stuff or argue abt certain stuff from last weeks post pls talk to me. cos my tagboards down and like i have no way of getting comments on what u pple think about the theories lolz.

anyway just got back from cycling. me marcus kevin and phil cycled down to germs hse to watch smallville. ltr germ joined us for a while to go serene. yea when we were leaving for serene, saw por dea bren. so yea said hi for a while and went off. the best part was the new route i discovered. haha like i saw it on my map, and i was kind of curious about it. so i brought the guys over to try it. was a risk but yea. turned out to be super scary and super tiring, but it was worth it. why? because it was totally empty. very long. and had an awesome downslope. too bad were were kind of tired climbing all the way up to fully experience the downslope. but was fun anyway lah. gave a satisfying feeling. finally reached chancery and split up.

tmr sat and life is normal. so have fun kids,.

universe

2005-04-10T08:03:00.000-07:00

you know there is no actual proof of how many stars and how many galaxies there are. and when scientiests say s constellation is 6 million light years away, they actually mean 4 to 9 million light years away. and theoretically speaking. there is no end to the universe.

okay lets put it this way. if there was an end to the universe, what do you think might happen if you looked out of the universe, what would you expect beyond?

lets say you travel outward in a straight line to the edge of the universe and somehow you make it, you would indefinitely end up in the place you started from. The reason for this is that the universe bends in a way we can't adequately imagine, in comformance with einsteins theory of relativity. For the moment it is enough to know that we are not adrift in some large, ever expanding bubble. Rather, space curves in a way that allows it to be boundless but finite.

okay its kind of hard to percieve and visualise it. okay an analogy usually given to explain the curvature of space is to try to imagine a man who has come from a universe of flat surfaces, who has never seen a sphere, being brought to earth. No matter how far he roamed about the planets surfaces, he would never find an edge. He might eventually return to the spot he started from, and be utterly confounded on how to explain how it happened. We are in kind of the same position in space as the puzzled flatlander, only we are flummoxed by a higher dimension.

so yea thats why there isnt a real end to the universe. and oh, the flatman illustration can sort of explain how God works in a certain way. a theory im too tired to write about now. So anyway im trying to get the taking back sunday vid into my blog. lifes been quite ..okay.. i guess. relatively, because nothing really bad has happened. nothing good has happened either, which somehow makes it feel relatively bad. okay im not making much sense. nostalgic is being overused. guess more people feel that way nowadays. its quite funny how we complain about how we missed the old times and stuff and keep dwelling on that past lets say 2 years ago. then another 2 years later, you'd be complaining about how you miss your life 2 years ago. yet 2 years ago, you were complaining how u missed your life 2 years ago. get it? so you'd be constantly complaining and dwelling on your pathetic experiences. if my theory is correct then maybe i should just enjoy my current state, bad or not..

which somehow strangely reminds me of physicists. they constantly search for an answer, the simplest formula or explanation to explain how everything works. but the thing is everytime they solve something, another problem arises, much like opening a box, and finding one inside. and as one famous physicist quoted," maybe there is no simple answer to the laws of the universe, maybe there is a never ending chain of answers and solutions to problems that stretch to infinity." okay something like that, cant remember exactly, and cant remember the persons name.

which runs with something like the heisenbergs uncertainty principle. that describes an electron as a particle that can sometimes be described as a wave. the uncertainty part of the theory is that you can either know where an electron is at a given instant, or know a path at which an electron takes as it moves through space, we cannot know both. any attempt to measure one will unavoidably disturb another. It isnt a matter of needing more precise instruments, its just an immutable property of the universe. or as Dennis Overbye has put it " Until observed an electron must be considered as being at once everywhere and nowhere." even when heisenberg was asked on how one could envision an atom, he said "dont try". we'd probably study it in A level physics or something, so dont bother to much..

yea have fun this week. do something great. or something.

plan failed

2005-04-02T22:29:00.000-08:00

anyway in case your wondering the video is buried a lie by senses fail.. changing it to bloody romance soon. also by senses fail. my week sucked. my plan failed. at the first step. which was the main 50 percent chance one. so yea obviously its gone now. next week it will be reduced to 25 percent. which is really low. the next week will probably be only 1 percent. which is as good as not occuring. looks i have to wait 1 whole year again. before this chance comes about. i missed it the first time. planned well for the second one and missed it. now lets wait next yr for the next one. or i could wait for the 25 percent one next week. yea lets hope next week it will happen.

nooo when will i take over the world.. or at least be a ninja.

dumb

2005-03-29T05:12:00.000-08:00

i dont get the ending part of lotr.. like out of nowhere the eagles appear and save the frodo and his friend from the erupting volcano. like if the eagles could do that why didnt they just freaking fly him from the shire all the way there in the beginning . i mean what the crap if the eagles cld fly all the way to the volcano place then why didnt they just send him all the way there in the first place. or at least bring them somewhere near the volcano. and im still so irritated abt the part where the ghosts just fly in and kill everything. i was like what the crap. thats all??.. i mean once again they cld have just done that at the beginning and killed all the orcs or something.. some hardcore lotr fan please explain to me the eagle part.

okay this weeks been going fine so far. had training today and the coach put me in hurdles. yesterday had tuition.. yess i cant wait for saturday!!!!!!! none of you will understand why. muahaha no one will know why. but anyway i cant wait. maybe by the law of random chances and events everything might actually work out well and my stupid near impossible plan will actually work. the chances of the first downside is 57 percent. second one which is probably the main one is approx 68.2 percent chance of not working out. the next one is about 46.3 percent not working. but somehow if i work against these stagerring statistics it would be absolutely incredible..

and in case your wondering. no it isnt what you think it is.