In the last few weeks I have received 2 calls relating to working overseas. Now the calls have not been along the lines of “should I work overseas?” more about how to get their partners onside. Let’s look at compromise and how you can have a discussion with your loved ones about whether this is the right thing for you to pursue now.

Talk

First and foremost you need to have a conversation about whether you would both be happy to work overseas and if so consider if the other person’s career just as transferable to where you are going?
How will this strengthen your relationship? How will this add value to your resume(s)? How can you support each other? Are you both able to work or does this allow your partner to study/Start a family/take a career break/do something different.

Talk some more

Questions about where you are heading…you should be able to answer:
Where would you live, what is the culture like, Are there tax breaks? Will you receive living away from home benefits? How will you make friends, what communities can you get involved with, how will you keep in touch with family and friends, what is the transport infrastructure like, can you get around easily, what is the local cuisine, will you have access to other ex-pats? How will you get back if there is an emergency? How long are you prepared to go for?

These questions will promote some really deep thinking and no doubt require some things to be answered by your employer, friends and loved ones.

Compromise

Compromise is finding agreement through communication. Whilst this may seem like the best thing since sliced bread for you and your career, your partner may not be as passionate. So try and start these conversations now so that when and if you are going to consider a role overseas, the support of your partner is a given and you can focus on starting your new job!

What have been your experiences?

I am often asked by my clients how to decide whether they are choosing the right role. Who has the crystal ball to know where this job will take them? My ’5 point plan’ will help you flesh out the most important decisions you need to make when  looking for a job and before accepting an offer of employment.

1. The role – the role on offer should be one that you will enjoy doing for at least 18 months, ask yourself, does it allow you to grow, will you enjoy your day, week, month.
2. Future progression – It is worth exploring whether the role you are going into will allow you build on your skills and progress your career. Is there evidence of other people being promoted internally? What is the training like? It may be that you will not progress in this company but you could make an external move in 18 months to a more senior role elsewhere.
3. People/Culture – You are going to spending a lot of time with these people, so make sure you like them! You need to fit with the team. Not getting along with people at work is incredibly draining when you spend 7+ hours a day together. Does your new manager inspire you; are there other mentors in the business?
4. Location – Let’s face it your journey to and from work sets you up either side of the day – to charge up ready for work, and take yourself off charge to relax and enjoy being with your family and friends. Make sure you are happy with the location. Also consider if there is relocation of the office on the horizon.
5. Salary – If all the boxes above are ticked then surely the money will be right? You would not want to be earning $100,000 in a job you do not like, with people you cannot stand to be around and commuting for 2 hours a day? Think about it.

I have had the order of priority challenged from time to time, especially when jobs were scarce during the economic downturn.

I am interested in your views on this.

Happy Valentine’s Day.

So who is on your list this year?  Will you send a card to anyone?

How about approaching your job search with the Valentine’s Day concept in mind? 

• Who do you most admire – work out what companies you want to work for, maybe you have heard good things about them?  Make a list of those you would like to work for.
• What do you most desire – when it comes to your job what makes you feel really happy?  When are you on top of your game?  What motivates you?  Again, add this to your list.
• How can you show some affection to your career – are there gaps in your skills, things you need to update and give some TLC
• Now to woo or court the object of your desire – approach the employer, people you know in the industry, HR, CEO – someone who will take note of your approach.  Be different, explain why you would love to work for them.
• …and be patient.

Remember you do not always get Valentine’s cards back, so you may not get a call, or be invited to have a chat with someone, but atleast you are being proactive and not reactive in this competitive market.

Good Luck.

While chatting with a business client the other day she revealed something quite raw.  It took a little time to build up to it but the bottom line was ‘I cannot find my mojo, which would be fine if we were approaching the Christmas break but that was nearly 6 weeks ago now!”

I acknowledged her for her honesty.  This was our first catch up since the break as she had wanted to have some much needed time out and enjoy the space this gave her both mentally and physically.  Now this statement worried her as she felt like she did not appear to have the mojo or desire to crack on with things in her business.

So how do you go about locating your mojo?

My questioning focussed on what she was thinking about her business – right now.

What made her feel disconnected?

What impact was this having?

What did she need to do to reconnect with the ‘working’ her and the workload ahead.

We discovered that she had enjoyed a great break, not having a strict agenda, enjoying lazy breakfasts with friends who she rarely had time for in the run up to her holiday.  She had enjoyed getting back into some form of fitness; running and yoga and eating well.  She was scared of letting all of this go for the demands of her business.  She was living life!

The truth is her mojo was there with her at all times.  She never stopped being creative, never stopped jotting down ideas, being inspired by friends with feedback on her business and product.  Just the mojo did not dominate her every waking moment…just happily bobbing alongside her.

She had previously created this enormous space for her work to consume her and was desperate for a break.  Whilst on leave  she had unknowingly managed to get a bit of her ‘life’ back.  She liked it.  Now faced with ‘getting back into work’ she felt she had to swap everything she had enjoyed for the last 6 weeks.

We created a plan that involved structure in her day, starting with something for her.  Yoga or a walk along the beach or breakfast with a friend who was free.  Even little things like not checking her email as soon as she woke up, keeping her laptop away from her lap until she was ready for ‘work’.  Getting dressed for work, even though she worked from home.  And, when she was ready to get into it she had to breakdown her work into various tasks.  Head down time (Admin), Chatter (calls and follow ups) and Design time (planning).

WIth this plan set she emailed me yesterday afternoon to advise of her success in the week.  Signing off with her name + Mojo!

So if you are feeling a little lost and not sure where to start contact me for a one-off session and see where it could lead…

Thanks for inspiring this blog post ‘M’

The topic appealed to me on 2 levels.  Having recently moved to Brisbane it would be worthwhile connecting with some like minded individuals in an environment with an interesting topic.

As you may recall I am also striving to live a life of Less is More this year so finding out more about this from a global perspective appealed.

Emily presented a lot of information and helped define what we consider Happiness to be.  For me it is Laughter, Family and a sense of Belonging in the world.  For others contentment, well-being and adventure featured.  Throughout the presentation we were offered statistics relating to how happiness is measured with themes including life expectancy, global financial status and suicide.  All things that enabled the researchers to come up the overall results of what made the most ‘happy’ country in the world.  Costa Rica is the place to be on all accounts it would seem.  Australia came in at number 11.  There were 3 secrets shared for the happiness of our friends in Costa Rica.  Rituals, Less Stimuli and Delayed Gratification.

Rituals – whether they are religious, spiritual like meditation or your regular yoga fix.  Rituals help you have a happier life.  They may include the family roast or BBQ, having a cup of coffee with the paper in the morning or your walk along the beach with the dog.  Whatever you do that is a regular thing increases your happy levels.

Less Stimuli - technology is such a wonderful thing. It is also the thing that makes us so instantly available and as each text message or email beeps we are stimulated to respond.  Ambient noise – cars and planes at night all add to constant stimuli.  Having moved recently from the bush to the city I can totally relate to this stimulation.  When in the bush I could not sleep for love of silence, now the road 200m away sounds like it is right outside.  Reduce your stimulation to increase happiness.

Delayed Gratification – it took me a while to get my head around this being an instant gratification kind of girl!  What this meant for me is not having a delay between a reward.  Having a bad day you can reach online and go shopping, anytime, anywhere.  Or reach for the biscuit barrel or wine!  It also meant that when my little ones demand something to delay the reward and not just give.  By experiencing delayed gratification you either have a greater sense of reward or not need the reward at all.  Some techniques here that may apply are breathing, counting to 10, doing something else and being distracted.

So what a wonderful evening of insight and personal development.  Also further changes to work on with my Less is More project.  Today I was still thinking about the presentation.  I did some additional research and discovered this TED talk by Nic Marks on The Happy Planet Index.  Skip to 13mins in to see what he thinks you need to be happy in this world.

Connect : Be active : Take notice : Keep Learning : Give

Wishing you all the happiness in the world!

Thanks to Emily Diamond of Excelleration she referenced Ruut Veen hoven Erasmus research.

How would you feel now?

Uneasy?

Nervous?

A little scared.

Making changes in any aspect of your life is hard.  It takes commitment, focus and a belief in yourself and your future.

Change can be exciting, exhausting, fantastic and frightening.

I have had a whirlwind 2 months.  My husband arrived back from a business trip announcing that he had been approached about a job in Brisbane.  And from there our family was catapulted into change central.

I tried my hardest to remain calm throughout the lengthy job interview process.  I openly accepted that change was here to stay for a while.  What was normal to us was thrown into a blender and mixed on high setting for many weeks.

It would have been easy to take the easy option and not move interstate.

Less to think about.

Less to plan.

Less to do on the to-do lists.

Yet the unknown future was something that was appealing.  It was exciting.  We could not cover our eyes to what was calling and when we took a peek with a weekend up there, to remind us of what change offered, we liked it.

The other thing that is good about change is the big conversations it starts.  What you want for your future.  Your children’s future.  Where you are at and where you want to be.  What you like about your lifestyle and what you would like to change.  It enables you to start over with some of those lingering habits.

I personally think change is something we start to fear, as we get older.  We can get set in our ways.  We react to certain things the same way.  I remember having a chat with a friend who shared her concern over what I must be going through.  I explained that with such mammoth amount of change going on I wanted to challenge my usual reactions.  So, what may have normally been a high stress situation with a reaction of high stress emotions I was channeling as much calm through our family as possible.  I think it worked.

It has been an exciting, exhausting, fantastic and frightening 8 weeks.  We arrived in Brisbane last week, unpacked, explored and tomorrow my husband starts his new job.

Change is here to stay for a while.

What are you going to change this year?

With the help of group buying sites like Living Social I have been doing a few more ‘out of the norm’ activities of late. I enjoyed a 4 hour photography master class in December and learnt how to use my DSLR camera.  So now I do not need to use automatic function preferring to experiment with settings that I previously feared.

Today – with the help of my friend Karen – I learnt how to trapeze.  Yes that’s right.  A circus act it was.  So much fun, so much to think about and so much to laugh about.

When I was little I used to spend hours twirling around and around on the metal poles at the supermarket. And here I am in my 30′s trying to connect with my inner child.

I found her.

After my 3rd attempt of clowning around and trying to get on the trapeze I was up up and away.  Do not understimate the strength required for trapeze.  And grace.  Though I left her outside at the beginning of the class.

So in my bid for a Less is More kind of year, I did something different, for less than the actual price and also spent 2 quality hours performing with a good friend.

I also had another friend on my mind today.  She lost her battle with Breast Cancer last year and had created a life list of things she wanted to do…(at 32 she had already achieved so much more than your average Joe!)  So learning trapeze featured on this list so I decided to do it for her.   She would have had a real giggle looking over our circus act today! 

Instead of writing a post about New Year Resolutions this year I want to make a “Statement of Change for 2012″.

As mentioned in my previous blog post 2011 has been an emotionally stretched year.

With an interstate move in 2012 it is a chance for me to really embrace change and challenge myself personally and professionally.

So my Statement of Change for 2012 is Less is More.

I am going to try and live a more simple life.

Ahead of our big move I have gone through each room in the house, each wardrobe, cupboard and drawer and have just thrown out so much stuff.  Good for the soul but all seemed such a waste.  Of course I gave away as much stuff as I could but I could not help but feel a bit empty at the fact I had bought this stuff with a need (or greed) in mind.

I have been doing a bit of research on living a simple life.  It seems I am not the only one who wants to strive for this in 2012.

• I follow Zen Habits Blog and this is one of the best for stripping out excess in your life.  Take a look at this post on 72 ideas to simplify your life – and yes for those that think this is too much – there are 2 simple points to review if 72 is too much for you!  I have a bit of work to do here but pleased to see I have made a start.
• I had a look at some friend’s Facebook updates – some looking for inspiration on New Year Resolutions – generally people wanted to work/eat/drink less or exercise more, cook more, move house or move on in their jobs.  It made me realise that we always have these things going on in our minds and the only thing that gets in the way of them happening is often ourselves.  So instead of having a huge list of to do’s just have a few.  Less is more.  You will achieve more.
• We are a society obsessed with consumerism so it appeals to me to become a rebel.  Yes I would still like to indulge in a nice meal and holiday from time to time but I am very keen to try and stop the wastefulness I have become so good at.

So you might be wondering how to implement this kind of change.  Seems pretty colossal.

For me this means:

• More meal planning – less waste
• More diary planning – less stress
• More family planning – less wasted moments
• Being more creative with my kids – less reliant on toys
• Reading more – being online less
• Walking more – driving less
• More music – Less TV
• More letters and emails – Less facebook
• More smiles and less frowns.
• More outside – less inside

Who came into my life.

Who moved on.

What I want to get out of next year. Here is my round up.

The Bad.

Maybe this should be ‘the sad’ rather than ‘the bad’. A few events this year have really rocked my world. Made me question certain things in life. Made me feel like we are no longer invincible. Made me look at the past and remove the rose tinted glasses at the glare of what was really going on. What comes with this is also the chance to look to the future and set up what my family wanted. Question our direction, our values and aspirations. Hit the reset button.

The Ugly

People say things happen for a reason. Some things that happened this year I could not reason with. There was no explanation. No justification. You just had to take it on face value. This has made me look at the future and take care of my health. I wanted to be available in moments of need for family and friends. And spend more time with them to create rich memory making moments.

The Good

This year has also been a magnificent year on so many levels.

Personally – our family became four, with the arrival of a scrumptious little sister for our son. Our little boy started pre-school and settled in so well, loving the time he has to play with teachers and friends. A social butterfly. Life is rich on so many levels. And busy.

Professionally – I went back to work after maternity leave to embark on Nourish Coaching full time. This meant an emotional goodbye to some old friends at a company I had worked with for over 7 years. Scary and exciting in equal parts. An amazing few months with fabulous clients and associates.

I have had some amazing experiences and opportunities in the last few months and am so excited about 2012.

I also want to thank everyone who has been part of my year. For making it what it was.

2012 will be the year of ‘New’ for my family and I. We are about to move to a new city, Brisbane, set up a new way of life up there and explore so many new things with family.

Bye bye 2011. It’s been a big year…though I have a feeling 2012 could be bigger.

Have you got your hands on the Nourish Manifesto?  Download and print your copy here