Be loving not scared.

1. He’s so gosh darn cute! -  Yea every child is cute (ok, maybe not all of them) especially your own but he has this look about him that is young and youthful and at the same time mature.  Its one of the reasons I’ve always called him my “Little Man.”
2. He tells it how it is! – No matter where we are, no matter the situation, he tell me what he really thinks.  Even if it will get him in trouble, he speaks his mind.  Its very liberating to hear, no apologies for what he is and what he thinks.  If he thinks the sky is purple, then the sky is purple to him.  One time we were doing some grocery shopping and a larger guy walked by.  The little guy saw, formed his opinion and let me know, “That guy has huge belly!  He could eat me and you!”  I argued back whilst trying to quiet him down, “Its not that big, the Hulk is bigger!”  He snapped back, “The Hulk has muscle, that guy has lots of FAT!” (The word “FAT” echoed in the grocery store) “No Aden, that’s not nice!”  he answered “But he IS!”
3. He isn’t scared of anything! – My little guy fears nothing!  He makes me look like a coward by comparison.  He sees a long dangerous patch of ice in our parking lot and decides that running as fast as he can and sliding on his knees is the best thing to do.  Well he misjudged the slide and ended up landing on his butt, cried until I picked him up, and ran to try it again.  He’s gonna be on Jackass one day.
4. He has an amazing imagination! – My baby boy has an imagination that sometimes make me question his sanity.  His solutions are always practical and work, well except for the car made out of chocolate.
5. He asks why. – He thinks critically and if he doesn’t understand something, he will sit there and question you until his thirst for knowledge is quenched or he gets distracted by something loud or shiny (even though it is getting harder these days).  He even makes me question my viewpoint on a few answers.
6. He has a good heart. – He wants to help whenever her can.  He is very generous.  We were at the store one day and he wanted a Hot Wheels car.  I agreed and he grabbed two, when I told him that he could only have one, he said that he wanted to get one for his brother and wouldn’t get one for himself if his brother didn’t get one as well.  I hope that generosity never changes.
7. He is oddly mature. – He instinctively knows what he is too old and too young to do.  While I see this as bad parenting on my part (he should just do what he feels) I am proud that he can figure out the “rules” without having to be taught them.  You gotta know the rules to break them!  Which he does.
8. He knows how to have fun. – I used to be a fun party guy.  I had my Ph D in fun and I taught impromptu classes all the time.  My son has inherited it fully.  I’ve scaled back on it alot but he never passes up the chance to remind me that life is to be enjoyed in every way.
9. He has a great sense of humor. – He can laugh at anything!  And just like a yawn, its contagious and delightfully so.  Just a day ago I was playing a game on my phone and he was watching.  I made a little “pew! pew! pew!”  sound for one of the little guns in it and he thought it was HILARIOUS!!!!  Anytime I did it, he would laugh.  Then he started mocking me and making fun of me for doing it all while laughing uncontrollably.  And as any parent knows, their child’s completely euphoric is intoxicating.  I didn’t think it was that funny when he started making fun of me for it but after few times I found myself and my lady laughing harder than him. (which isn’t easy to do)  Good times!
10. He is himself. – He makes so qualms about being himself.  Whether he is rude or incredibly thoughtful, greedy or generous, being his wild self or behaving nicely.  He knows who he is and doesn’t question it.  If he has mad one second he is ok with that, if he is happy, he doesn’t second guess it or try to hold on to it.  He is very strong when it comes to himself and what he wants.  I have tried to shake him on how he feels about certain things but he is a rock!  If he feels someway about something, that’s it!  This is the trait I pray he keeps as he sails through the storm of adolescence. But if he needs the coast guard, I got him.

I know what I want to do.  I want to help people to think differently.  More about what is possible, realistically possible to accomplish in their lives.  To help them to realize that they can do and should do what makes them feel alive.  Every morning/night I hear once phrase come out of my lady’s mouth.  One thought that escapes her lips:  I don’t wanna go to work.  She means it with every fiber in her body.  I feel it when she says it (or mumbles it in wee hours of the morning).  It hurts to hear it, it hurts that I think it too.  I know it hurts when YOU think it.  But that’s a good thing.  Because if it didn’t hurt, then we would be numb to it, used to it, accepting of it.  Some people do work that they deep down enjoy!  But for a lot of people these days (especially in this recession) only go to work for the money.  Trading that little bit of GREATNESS in them for a paycheck.  Some make more money from that trade but any amount of money, security, or status traded for something priceless is a RIP-OFF!

I’m currently working for the best job that I’ve ever had.  The pay is great, I have great benefits, and I work with awesome people.  But I’m dying a little inside each day.  Because I’m not doing anything that I was meant to do.  Sure I’m good at it just like a butter knife would be good at being a flat head screw driver but I wasn’t made for this.  I want to say that it was the long hours that pushed me to leaving, I want to say it was being on call, robbing me of playtime with our boys or taking calls in the middle of the night.  All of that are part of it but they  weren’t the burning reason.  It was her heartfelt admission that she didn’t want to do what she was doing.  Its one thing to know that somebody is suffering with this but its a whole other thing to hear it everyday from somebody you love.  As I’m writing this, I just realized that I’m leaving my job so that she can leave hers.  I love you baby and I’m bringing you home.

Its good to be home.

Southern Exposure (478 photos)
19 March 2010

Albumul poate fi vazut doar online.

My lifelong pet who grew pretty fat through the years

On a diet of worry, uncertainty, and fears

You watch me move toward dreams and aspirations

With a disapproving look, you cause me hesitations

I wish you would just leave and run away

Disappear altogether and become a stray

My actions betray my wishes as I keep your bowl full

I give you what you need, how could you resist that pull

I care for you better than I do for myself

And I keep you on a pedestal, high on the shelf

Because even if you should fall you won’t meet defeat

Everybody knows cats always land on their feet

I tried to lock you out with books with pages of locks

But your ship always comes back in with me sitting on the dock

I tried to fight fire with water so I got a dog, fearless and apathetic

But you turned that Pit into a Poodle with facts and what could happen, pathetic

Assassination was my next plan, you can’t nag if your not alive

But you had too many lives, I gave up around five

So I just decided to give up and not to fight it

I’m still not completely happy, but your going on a diet

Contradiction.  In case you missed it, let me say it again.  Contradiction.  That’s what we all are.  What?  Its in that great divide between how most of us act versus who we really are inside and what we really want to do.  I understand that we have to behave in order to keep the job, the marriage or relationship, or friends.  But the longer you do that, the more repressed you make they person deep inside you.

With financial times being tough right now (but really, when aren’t they tough?) I can understand the fear in letting your real self shine through.  What will people think?  Will they accept you?  Will you lose everything you’ve working for?  WHO CARES! It wasn’t the real you who gained all those things anyway.  Let me backtrack, it was you but not he whole you.  You used to be you a long time ago when you were a kid.  You looked at possibilities and weren’t concerned with what couldn’t be done.  This was the you without limits, without somebody telling you couldn’t do something or that it was too hard or costs too much.  But of course you know what happened.  You grew up and started living in “reality”.  And you learned that the good guy doesn’t always win or even come close, that being a good boy or girl doesn’t always get you want you want.  Where all of the fairytales started to unravel and the truth was woven in its place.  Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t all bad and for most people this realization was even good.  But you learned to live in a box, you learned not to run when you wanted to, to not sing too loud, to not act too wild, to not speak your mind because somebody might see it as rude.  These rules probably saved you a few ass kickings but in exchange it cost you a bit of yourself.

I was talking to my special lady last night and she pointed out that she knows the side that I show her is fake.  A shell of who I have to be to keep juggling the things in my life successfully and give my little man a life I didn’t have.  Hypocritical I know but I don’t know if I would be a good dad by being myself.  This very special lady threw some more common sense my way, “The real you is in between who you have to be and who you want to be.”  So simple yet so powerful.  Realizing that I have to close the gap to get real, I’ll be taking some time to stalk the inner me.  I recommend you do the same.  My special lady knows how to play by the rules but also know how to take time to be herself.  She can be rude, mean, loud, and all of those other things that alot of us are too “polite” to be.  I love her for it because its HER! There isn’t a question in my mind that that’s the way she really feels from the core of her soul.  And even if I don’t agree, I respect and love it.  She still has alot of contradiction (see definition above)  in her but she is light years ahead of alot of people (including me) in closing the gap.  And that is the reason that I listen when she talks!  Anyway, that’s the point, CLOSE the CONTRADICTION GAP! Because in the middle is where you will find the real you.  Not the fairlytale you who believes in everything and not the you who pretends, but the you that’s a perfect mix of the person you have to be and want to be.

Albumele pot fi vazute doar online.

Where were you when I needed you?
When my heart fell apart and I needed the glue
When I stood cold and alone
You didn’t answer your phone
When nothing seemed to dull the pain
I sat and I cried and sobbed your name
I needed you bad, worse than ever before
Tears in my eyes, everything is a blur
I wanted to go find you but didn’t know where to look
So I wandered around, empty inside crying while I shook
You said you would be there when it all came crashing down
I laughed at your promise, but now my smirk is a frown
I call again with hope in my eyes
Voicemail again, I’m not surprised
Where are you? I need a shoulder to lean
Somebody to tell me the world isn’t so mean
A few kind words from somebody who cares
A beacon of kindness or at least a few flares
I’ll never trust again, this time I mean it
The belief, the hope, bah! Who needs it!
Me, myself, and I is all I need
A self-sufficient plant, I’m planting the seed
So next time I’m down and I need a hand up
I won’t ask where you were, I’ll just stand up

They’re Back! Those wonderful Church Bulletins! Thank God for church  ladies with typewriters… These sentences (with all the BLOOPERS)  actually appeared in church bulletins or were announced in church  services:

The Fasting & Prayer Conference includes meals.

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The sermon this morning: ‘Jesus Walks on the Water.’ The sermon tonight: ‘Searching for Jesus.’

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Ladies, don’t forget the rummage sale. It’s a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands.

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Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say ‘Hell’ to someone who doesn’t care much about you.

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Don’t let worry kill you off – let the Church help.

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Miss Charlene Mason sang ‘I will not pass this way again,’ giving obvious pleasure to the congregation.

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For those of you who have children and don’t know it, we have a nursery downstairs.

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Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get.

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Irving Benson and Jessie Carter were married on October 24 in the church. So ends a friendship that began in their school days.

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A bean supper will be held on Tuesday evening in the church hall.  Music will follow.

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At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be ‘What Is Hell?’ Come early and listen to our choir practice

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Eight new choir robes are currently needed due to the addition of several new members and to the deterioration of some older ones.

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Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children.

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Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you want remembered.

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The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility.

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Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM – prayer and medication to follow.

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The ladies of the Church have cast off clothing of every kind. They may be seen in the basement on Friday afternoon.

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This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin.

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Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. is done.

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The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday.

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Low Self Esteem Support Group will meet Thursday at 7 PM. Please use the back door.
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The eighth-graders will be presenting Shakespeare’s Hamlet in the Church basement Friday at 7 PM. The congregation is invited to attend this tragedy.

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Weight Watchers will meet at 7 PM at the First Presbyterian Church.  Please use large double door at the side entrance.

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The Associate Minister unveiled the church’s new campaign slogan last Sunday: ‘I Upped My Pledge – Up Yours.’

Once upon a time, there was a Scorpion and a Fish. They lived on land and in the ocean respectively. Not content with where they were, together they go on an adventure to get where they want to be…

One sunny day both were on the beach, the Scorpion on the sand dreaming of a life in the water and the Fish wondering what it would be like to be out of the water and on land. Both caught up in their respective daydreams, they slowly drifted closer and closer to one another. When the tide was at its highest, the Scorpion and the Fish were closest to each other. Unaware of the others presence, they continued their similarly opposite fantasies. Watching from a nearby rock was the Crab. The Crab was good friends with both the Scorpion and the Fish. The very wise and clever Crab’s crustacean lips slowly curved into a smile as its eight little legs scurried it toward its two friends.

The Fish, enjoying her time so close to land, ran her fins across the still warm, wet sand and sighed to herself. She wished with every scale on her body to be able to tread on the land that so many weird creatures called home. She wondered what it would be like to have legs and to be able to “sit” as she had witnessed her friend the Frog do after he grew his legs. She wondered if she would ever grow legs. But she already knew the answer. If her mother and father didn’t have legs, why would she? Her land induced depression clouded her thoughts as she ran another fin arcoss the sand. She wanted to blame the water for how she felt. She always felt imprisoned by water. A prison that not only moved her where it wanted her to go but was also what she relied on and needed to live. Her conflict between what she needed to survive and what she wanted to live tugged at her soul.

At the same time, not more than three feet away was the Scorpion, looking out towards the ocean. His thoughts mirrored that of the Fish’s but with an envy of a life in the sea. Scampering along the edge of his watery dreamworld, his thoughts drifted. He dreamed of how great it would be to swim around in the ocean. Being able to almost fly as he had seen his friend the Snake do countless times. The Scorpion was bored of land. He was sick of being stuck on the ground and wanted to move freely around. Up and down, to the left, to the right and in a circle. The Scorpion dreamed of all of the ways he would float around the the water before he caught himself drawing the shapes with his tail. The Scorpion envied the sharks and the swordfish. They never had to look for cover when it rained. They never had to shield themselves from the hot sun. And they never got blown away in the wind. They just spent their time carelessly flying around underwater without a care in the world. The Scorpion wanted that, he wanted to roam free in that wonderfully blue oceanic sky. But as he ran the facts through his head, he knew it to be impossible. As much as he loved the water, he loved breathing more and just stood there contemplating a life in a world he could never belong to.

The sun was setting beautifully on the beach’s sun glazed coastline as the Crab put its plan into action. The Crab scurried up to the Fish and said, “Hello my dear! Beautiful day isn’t it?” The Fish, startled at the Crab’s sudden appearance replied, “Oh, hi Crab. The day looks great but could have felt better….” the Fish trailed off still slightly saddened about her little mermaid dreams that would never come true. “Still wishing you could walk on land like me?” the Crab mercilessly sings as its eight legs dance a solo waltz around the beach. The Fish blows bubbles in an annoyed protest of the Crab’s mockery of her feelings. The Crab ended its dance with a question. “Come dance with me?” The Fish tilted her head quizzically, motioned one of her fins at her Caudal or tail fin, all without breaking her grim stare at the Crab. “Your lucky!” blurted out the Fish. “Your an alien on both planets and you don’t even need a ship.” The Crab scampered closer to the fish with a serious look on its face, pokes its eyes into the water and mutters, “I’m a jack of all trades but a master of none.” The Crab was known for that: answering a message, comforting a friend, calming a situation, comparing situations, or conveying a complex idea with one line. “You see,” the Crab continued as it pulled its face out of the water, “you swim beautifully in the water and move around so freely while I, am at the mercy of whatever current happens to grab me. And yes I can go onto land easily and walk around, but these eight legs make walking cumbersome as it does with swimming. So you see, while I am able to traverse into and out of water and land, I do neither very well. The stubborn Fish didn’t care and would give her right fin for the ability to “walk”, albeit clumsily, on land. This feeling was conveyed to the Crab through the Fish’s eyes. The Crab smiled and said, “How would you like to go out on land?” The Fish’s almost burned out eyes suddenly overloaded with excitement and intrigue. “Do tell…” the Fish responded as her heart made its way back down to earth. “Meet me here where the water ends and the land begins tomorrow right before the sun rises from the water.” The Fish quickly and sarcastically asked, “You mean here? Right before sunrise?” “Yea” the Crab answered with a tinge of disappointment in its voice. “Why does everything always have to be a big deal with you. You always act like your telling some super important story that……” the Fish whined as the ocean drowned her out and she swam away. The Crab could see the spark of excitement in the Fish’s eyes as her mouth complained. She can’t hide that, never could. “One down, one to go…” the Crab thought as it scuttled toward land.

Rays flicker through the smoke from the lightening as it crackles outside.  Again and again light illuminates the smoke-filled room as their eyes continue to lock in an unexpected stalemate.  Her with both hands on her gun pointed firmly at his forehead.  And him, with one hand on a shard of glass and the other firmly gripping a grenade with his index finger ready to yank the pin.  He knows that the grenade will make her second guess popping him in the head.  Even if she could get a clean shot, it would only take a fraction of a second for him to take her with him.  Should she lose focus for a even a second, the glass will make her pay for it.  His classic “sword and shield” strategy has never failed him.  She tries to hide her surprise with an even colder stare and a tighter grip aimed at his temple.  She contemplates taking a chance against his reaction time and giving him one to the head.  Either that or shoot his hand off and run for it.  She decides to stick with her plan and keep him talking until she can figure something out and pray that he makes a mistake.   With the smoke still heavy around them, every flash of light highlighting the intensity in their eyes.  Eagerly waiting for the other to be distracted only for a second, just long enough to make their move.  They circle each other, only a meter apart, him trying to get closer and her the opposite.  Both being careful not to move too fast and trigger a reaction.  “Where is our son?” he asks coldly.  “Safe for the time being” she responds, knowing that her knowledge is the only thing keeping him from rushing in and forcing her hand, “they are using him as leverage against me and if you take me out, they’ll have no more use for him.”  His forehead wrinkles in the middle, “Let’s say that I believe you, why tell me now, other than to save your own life?” Without hesitation, “To save his.”  His face shows nothing but complete focus on her.  A drop of sweat trickles down into his eye, he blinks, ignoring the sting,  “You think we’re gonna work together to save him?”  “If you love him as much as I do, you’ll do whatever it takes.”  His teeth grit as he realizes that what she says is the truth.  He couldn’t take a chance on calling her bluff, single-handedly dooming their son.  He eases his grip on the glass and slowly backs away, still ready to flick it into her throat should he second-guess himself or her words.  Her trigger finger eases only slightly knowing what he would do if he felt anything was out of place.  “Whats the plan?” he asks as he sulks backwards into a shadowy safe spot where she can’t tell “exactly” where he is.  “I was supposed to deliver you on a silver platter” she smirked, “and we can both see how well that’s going.” He lets a slight smile sneak out but doesn’t let it show in his voice, “true,  but the only people who know what happened here are you and me.”  She keeps her gun aimed squarely at where she guesses he is, “You’ve got a plan and I want to hear it.”  He throws a rock against a barrel around his old position to watch her squirm.  She instinctively aims in the rock’s direction and fires.  Before the empty casing even hit the ground she realized her mistake and prepared for his wrath.  But before she could even frown, he was behind her.  With a quick twist of her wrist, he had her disarmed.  She felt a wet cloth slide past her hand and then slap over her nose and mouth.  She tries to hold her breath but he gave her a quick blow to the abdomen, causing her to suck in a deep euthanizing breath.  A devilish smile creeps across his face as he whispers in her ear, “We’ll talk when you wake up.”  Her vision gets blurry as she loses consciousness, “If you wake up…….”

14. PICK UP A BOX OF CONDOMS AT THE PHARMACY, GO TO THE COUNTER AND ASK WhERE THE FI TTING ROOM IS.

I might actually answer, if not, leave me a message!

So either click below or call 409 – OCBENJI

You can give me a call anytime, just look at the bottom of the site!

One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen.  Her natural beauty took his breath away. “I may look like just an ordinary man,” he said to her, but in just a few years, my father will die, and I’ll inherit $200 million.”

Impressed, the woman obtained his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

Women are so much better at financial planning than men.