Anyway, this is a much better use of Choose the Form of the Destructor.

(I get nothing from you clicking the link or buying or anything. I just think it’s funny).

I find it hilarious, beginning to end. I’ve watched it many times, listened to the director (Scott Sanders) and writer/Black Dynamite his ownself Michael Jai White discuss it. I think it has as many great quotes as Princess Bride (or pick your own quotable movie) but because it’s rated R it’s just a little harder to work them into conversation (not that I don’t try).

I love this bit, where Black Dynamite is talking to Gloria (who happens to be one of the few people in the movie with a normal-sounding name):

So, yeah, I love this movie, it is an awesome distraction, and it doesn’t bring out the emotional response that so many movies have (how come every damn movie works in something about divorce nowadays?) so it is a bit perfect for me at the moment. It allows me to not dwell on that thing that is bigger than me, the train wreck I’ve been riding for a long time.

Do you see where I’m coming from you jive motherfucker!

See? And that quote is mild, and the page linked here leaves out the really offensive stuff such as this entire scene, which is a wonderful homage to this scene from 35 years ago.

As I’ve said before, we are in the middle of a drought, so we don’t generally mind a little rain.  Last night, however, wasn’t just “a little” rain, I think estimates are for 6 to 10 inches of rain.  In about an hour.

So the house flooded, several inches in several rooms.  Cleanup is still happening, insurance adjuster has been called, not sure if it’s badly damaged – sheetrock, dontchu know.   More to follow

My apartment fared much better, being upstairs, we lost power and internet at various times but that’s it.

Click here to view the embedded video.

“Which barefoot shoes do you have?”

edit to say: I realize that as sporadic as I write things (and where I write various things) that you may not know this about me; so while it feels a little like stealing the punch line from a joke, I wanted to add this- I run barefoot, and have generally for almost two years. Did a couple miles this morning, in fact. I’m not preachy about it, I have heard all of these things at some point (thank you, internet). Yes, I’ve read Born to Run. I do not run in “barefoot shoes” but I do have some funky sandals I made myself from a kit (not surprisingly I purchased the kit from the guy who made this video, he’s great). I prefer to be barefoot but not if it makes other people uncomfortable.

OK, enough about that, if you wanna hear more about it just ask, I promise I will never make you take your shoes off to visit my blog.

Again, no, this isn’t some kind of hidden message to anyone, I just love these supercut things, and damn this one is funny.

Warning: NSFW language.

Click here to view the embedded video.

“If there’s anything more important than my ego around, I want it caught and shot now.”
- Zaphod Beeblebrox

I try and leave out a lot of the junk I’m dealing with my kids here, just, well, because. I generally don’t deal in a lot of specifics lately. In any case this is a blog about ME. It’s MINE. And I’m making this shit up as I go and don’t want to bore you with particulars.

Even so, I wanted to say that today I reached some sort of bizarre milestone.

In the last six months, I have been sworn in beside my son in front of three different judges in three different jurisdictions – city, county, and state. We hit the trifecta.

All we need is some sort of Federal case and we can call it a jackpot. And probably declare game over.

Not bragging, too much, but I spent a while at work and finished a huge fucking project.   I would love to share both the weather and my accomplishment, but of course I’ve driven everyone truly important out of my life.  So I’m having a beer and watching Date Night on cable (“…And will you, for the love of God, put on a fucking shirt?“) and getting annoyed that there is an F1 key on this laptop where my old (now busted) netbook had an ESC key.

I do have the blinds open, some.  And I’m about to dig in to some leftovers.  A real wild man.

I’m usually busy watching zombie movies, or aliens, or football. Or maybe a raunch comedy about middle age guys that get lost in Vegas or something.

Zombies playing football? Would be awesome. Messy, and probably pretty short. Awesome, though.

Since I think I’m stuck in one, how do the Lifetime movies usually end? Is it happily ever after? Does the bad guy win? Riding off into the sunset or does the city burn to the ground?

Zombie movies are pretty predictable. So is football. I like to pretend my life movie is still in production.

(you can stop laughing any time)

This post was sent from my phone (which is smarter than I am) and was a very short post saying something along the lines of my home computer is dying a painful death so if I want to post it will have to be from my phone.

…and obviously that didn’t work so well. If I post by email it has to be text only and my program must be adding some html or other bs to the body of the message (which is why only the subject line posts).

I’m sorry, you’ll have to just do without my witty wonderfulness until I have access to a computer to post from or until I figure out how to make my phone more blog friendly or something.