Links to Jenny’s blogger crushes:

Besotted Blog http://www.besottedblog.com/ | Cupcakes and Cutlery http://www.cupcakesandcutlery.com | You are my Fave, http://www.youaremyfave.com/ | Alexandra Hedin Design http://alexandrahedin.com/ | Note to Self http://notetoself.typepad.com/ | Camille Styles. http://camillestyles.com/ | Mrs. Lilien. http://blog.mrslilien.com/

I fancy myself a pretty open person, but there is a gap between my real life and the life that I present here. Sometimes things get edited out. Or gussied up. And sometimes I just talk about pretty or silly things. Because sometimes that’s just easier. But seeing and reading the first and the second rounds of these posts was inspiring. I found myself wanting to bare my soul, too. So when Leslie asked me if I wanted to participate in the next round of posts, I agreed. And then I immediately regretted agreeing because I had no idea what I would say or how I would say it. But, there’s fifteen of us posting today and I knew that meant I couldn’t back out (even though I kinda wanted to).

So here goes.

Things I Am Afraid to Tell You: 

I think for the most part I’m a fairly happy, together and grounded lady. I try to focus on the positive things in my life and pay attention to being happy in the every day. But I’m not always happy. I act like I’m an optimist but there is a strong thread of pessimism that runs through me. It’s an interesting breed of pessimism though because it’s only directed at me. So while I believe generally that good things happen and that things work out for the best for everyone else, it doesn’t apply to me. And the the truth is I spend too much time being scared.

I’m scared that I’ll never meet the right man for me. Or that I’ve already met him and I didn’t realize it. Or that I’m looking for the wrong things. Or that he lives on the other side of the world. No matter the reason I’m sort of convinced I’m just one of those unlucky people who will end up alone. And it terrifies me. Because even though I’m a pretty independent person, I’d still really like to find someone to share my life with. And maybe it won’t happen.

I’m scared that I’ll never get the chance to have children. And I’d really like to do that and I think I would be good at it. And I sort of hate Facebook now because all it is is baby after baby and while I’m individually excited and happy for everyone, when you put all those babies together in one place it’s like one big baby faced punch to my sad uterus. And sometimes it makes my heart hurt. So I don’t look at Facebook too much because I find myself having feelings of envy and I don’t want to be that person.

I’m scared that all the weight I’ve lost will instantly come back if I eat pizza or skip the gym for a day. I’m scared that I’ll never be fully happy with my body. And I’m scared that I’ll always feel like the fat girl.

I’m scared that I’m making all the wrong choices. And that maybe I’ll never have the happy, settled life of love and family and laughter that I want.

In case that wasn’t enough, here’s some more crazy: I smoke cigarettes. I drink too much. I’m kind of lazy. I never call people back. I haven’t cleaned my fridge in two years. I never wash my duvet cover. I pay for a New York Times subscription that I hardly ever read. I really want people to like me. And I spend a disgusting amount of money on new clothes and I should donate (a lot) more to charity.

So there you have it. Just a wee bit of crazy around here. Be sure to go visit the other brave souls who posted today, as well.

And, as always, thanks for reading. xo

Jill at Terra Savvy | Erica at The Elbow | Jen at Taking Off the Mask | Kate at Modern Home Modern Baby | Laura at My So Called Sensory Life | Monique at Razing Mayhem | Caroline at Salsa Pie | Leslie at Life In Every Limb | Tammie at Tam.Me | Melanie at Inward Facing Girl | Michelle at Early Mama | Jen at Jen Epting | Leslie at Lights and Letters

{image via Life Magazine archive}

There’s something I’ve noticed in my on-going dating adventures. It usually happens around the third date and I call it the slow fade out. It’s happened enough times for me to have named it and it’s exactly what it sounds like. Him or me or both of us just sort of lose interest and stop communicating. Sometimes it’s a slow taper and sometimes it’s a little more sudden but it always ends in a way that feels a tad bit abrupt and oddly unfinished. Now these “things” haven’t been going on long enough to garner any sort of conversation from either party but it is a strange, re-occurring thing. And I think it happens around the third date because that actually marks a turning point. By the third date you’re starting to have a real idea about who this person is. And it feels like a step, like “okay let’s do this “dating” thing. Or not.”

So I’ve been landing on the “or not” side of things lately and the slow fade out has become a pretty standard part of this whole process. And I haven’t lost any sleep (or tears) over these s.f.o’s but to go from what seemed like warmish to ice cold so quickly makes you wonder, are men just crazy? Fickle? Do they really adhere to the out of sight out of mind rule? Or is it the age old answer of “he’s just not that into you?” Of course, I haven’t been all that into any of them, either. If I’m not leading the slow fade out, I quickly become a willing participant. Because the men who’ve seemed promising on the first date always seem less so by the third. And isn’t it supposed to be the other way around? Shouldn’t getting to know them make me more excited and more into them?

I’m really hoping when that happens I’ll know it. Something will feel different. And neither of us will pull the old slow fade out move. Because hopefully, we’ll want to hang out with each other for awhile. Yes that sounds simple enough. But I’m learning that finding somebody I’d like to hang out with for awhile is harder than it sounds. And don’t even get me started on finding someone to hang out with for forever. Egad.

{Image by Jenny of Hank & Hunt on design editor. Found via Cyd from The Sweetest Occasion‘s on pinterest}

So that’s what I’ve got for you today. I continue to look and see what’s out there and hope and of course laugh and have fun and smile. That’s probably the most important thing, right? And with that, I’ll wish you a Happy Holiday Weekend. I hope it’s full of fun and festivity and that super awesome feeling that marks the unofficial start of summer. Hoo. Ray.

xo

{Dale Keys | Society 6}

I stayed out sort of late (yes, on a date) and now I’m getting ready to head to yoga. Back tomorrow though. And in exciting-and-slightly-dangerous-but-tasty news: I found a delicious taqueria in my neighborhood that I can’t stop thinking about. Uhoh, I smell trouble. And tacos.

So you can imagine my delight when I was invited to an all rosé wine tasting (a.k.a. dreamscape!) last week hosted by Sarah Bryden-Brown of Blogstar. The guest list was insanely awesome (Maggie(!), Gretchen, Meg, Susan, Ashley, Deborah, Victoria, Leslie, Natalie) and I’m convinced I was invited by accident. But accident or not, it was truly a fantastic time. I mean what’s not to love about delicious wine and snacks in the back room of Pansanella & Sons (what a fabulous space! it’s my new favorite wine store) plus smart, beautiful and inspiring women to chat with. So yeah, sometimes my life ain’t too shabby.

{image from my new pal Leslie}

And what kind of me would I be if I left without picking up a few bottles? These were my two favorites. I wish you all a very happy and festive Season of Rosé!

]]> http://oldsweetsong.com/2012/05/and-so-begins-the-season-of-rose/feed/ 7 http://oldsweetsong.com/2012/05/and-so-begins-the-season-of-rose/ http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/oldsweetsong/AMlJ/~3/s6r3Jt_PhJU/ http://oldsweetsong.com/2012/05/cards-against-humanity/#comments Tue, 22 May 2012 13:56:56 +0000 Amy@OldSweetSong http://oldsweetsong.com/?p=9380

So y’all know the game Apples to Apples right? I love that game. But now I have a game I love even more. Meet Cards Against Humanity. It’s the exact same concept as Apples to Apples but the cards are way more hilarious and offensive. I mean everything you need to know is right in the tagline, “a party game for horrible people.” Um. Yes please, where do I sign up? This seemed like the perfect thing to bring along to my sister’s bachelorette weekend because these kinds of games are always much more fun with the addition of booze. The thing is Cards Against Humanity is wildly popular and it’s always sold out. But never fear! The games creators have made a (free) downloadable pdf available. So all you have to do is download it, print it on a thick card stock at home (or at Staples which is what I did) and use a paper cutter to cut out all the cards. And once you’re done the cards fit perfectly into one of those plastic boxes from The Container Store (this one). And it looks pretty cute, too.

So if you like offensive humor (and I’m a fan) Cards Against Humanity might be the game for you. And it makes a perfect (and cheap) gift for the offensive humor lover in your life. Just add wine and you have a night of hilarious hijinks.

Here’s my Happy Picture. It’s my nephew, Nicky. My mom snapped it with her iPhone at a Braves game last season and sent it to me. I think it’s during the seventh inning stretch and he’s singing Take Me Out To The Ball Game. I love this picture because he looks so happy. And if he’s happy then I’m happy. Oh and because he’s adorable and perfect. So there’s that.

About a month ago, when I was in Arizona with one of my besties, I received some tough love from in the form of a stern talk regarding some of my dating choices. She knows me better than most so everything she said was not only completely valid but the kind of stuff that sort of knocks you on your ass and makes you think “ohhhhhhhhhhhh.” She said I’m too preoccupied with finding someone funny and that I should stop focusing on that so much. I do admit to a weakness for funny men. I spent four years with a man who wasn’t very funny and I swore to myself I’d never do that again. It is of the utmost importance to me that I spend my life laughing. But my friend brought up several good points in regards to my infatuation with hilarious dudes. According to her, I’m quite funny and I love plenty of people who aren’t super hilarious but we still laugh together often. And while someone who makes funny jokes is great, for the long haul I don’t need a comedian or a joke writer or someone who is going to be performing bits for me all the time. What I need is someone who is HAPPY. And if I find someone who is happy, the laughter will come right along with him.

And I think she was dead on. Happiness is so very important. Not that the person has to be in a good mood 24/7 (although I’m probably one of the few people who wouldn’t mind that) but that they are positive, comfortable in their skin, settled and like life. I’ve spent too much time with men who were basically a few mere steps from miserable and I’ve decided life is too short. I’m happy and I’d really like to have a happy life so I’ve decided to try and look for that in the men that I date. It seems obvious now, but it took me awhile to get here. And by the way, I recently went on a date with a happy man and it was incredibly refreshing, not to mention a hell of a lot of fun. I thought to myself “ohhhhhhh, this is what happy looks like.”

So here’s to happy men and happy weekends. I hope to find both. xo, Amy

{images from LIFE photo archive}

The Peach State by The Wheatfield

I have a wee addiction to art from home state. And I just might have to add this print (sent to me by a good pal) to my ever-growing collection. I’m heading back to NYC this morning so for now, I’ll just bask in my post-Georgia-visit glow. There’s just something about being home. It’s good for the soul. It must be because you get to see all of your favorite people and fill up on all the love and goodness that only they give you. Or maybe it’s the Chick-fil-a.