There is an upside though. A nation full of people that  think they have experienced the heat of a ghost pepper have yet to experience  the heat of a ghost pepper:) So this Christmas season I suggest you rustle up something truly memorable for them out of the most there’s so many of them but I’ve always had great service from Extreme Foods and   most years I get this Box of heat which  is a random selection of their products and probably will melt their faces, rear-ends and driveways

Updated for Mar 2017.

Biggest changes in past few years.  After leaving Go Daddy took a year , plus off to watch daughter grow up,   bought a franchise which turned out to be bad timing re illness , family matters , etc so I ended up going back to work, this time for  P.F. Chang’s / Pei Wei which makes Asian-inspired food. It was nice to work for a company that most people don’t hate: Same kind of work Software Quality assurance but alas my position, along with several others, was ( redacted- )

Having just made contact again with the folks back home in the UK as they come on line with Facebook et all and find that I am still alive, still haven’t changed my name  to , well they don’t even know me as, haltse it’s been obvious that I needed an update post on the things that are interesting in the USA that hasn’t made it over to the UK. There are people that are into Zombies that actually don’t know who Doug Stanhope or Roger Clyne are,  I know, mind blown.

So here’s a quick list of what I’ve been up to since leaving Scotland back in 1997.

Moved to GA  70 mile NW of Atlanta worked for 2 seasons at tax software co helping cheap people achieve things with hardware that was pushing obsolescence into itself, seriously I edited modem strings, printer files and more CLI DOS work than ever should be attempted with members of the public.

After GA moved to CA  on the eve of the millennium. Took 4 days to move.People in the UK, sorry it’s not a long way down to the chip chop, that’s peanuts to America:)

Yep everyone has been there and I don’t mean on vacation. Not to give it away but Californication was a nice couple of years working for a dot com that turned  b2c b2b  and b2b2c so quickly that it had to fail. Actually,it didn’t fail, people were paid, had jobs for a couple of years and had a lot of fun with nice people while doing it.

Became permanent resident, Marriage failed,  company above was bought by AOL  and I moved to Arizona where I managed to lose the friend I came here to be near ( I’m good at this it’s a motif for my life apparently )

Started working for GoDaddy.com  and lasted 11 years. Started as privately owned, which I liked, ok I only like it if I like the owner which in this case is a good match but  GD was sold to venture capitalists that changed the nature of the Co, and it was time to go. There’s little chance I could have achieved as much in the UK than I have here because,well to be blunt, it’s not a  wait till Friday to get drunk and take Monday off kinda culture. ( not true, probably 1/3 of it is:) )

Met my wifelet, Erin  spawned a Dobhran, and a Hatch, he’s 12 in September 2017 and Hatch, our daughter, joined us July 2012.

All the links to my photo sites, blogs and the like can be found through the sidebar but just in case.

http://flickr.com/photos/haltse

Besides I’m  haltse everywhere that matters

That’s the precis.   And just about all of it is contained somewhere in the posts to this blog.

New likes.

Ice Hockey. I’ve finally found a team sport that I appreciate, or did till I realized how shitty the customer service aspect was.  I still watch it but won’t pay to see the Phoenix Coyotes after they shafted us on playoff tickets.  I still like watching tennis ( mainly the women’s:) ) US tv sucks for motorsport without chasing it down and paying for it. As such not really followed F1 or WSB for a while.

Watches.    Mechanical,  limited and free of marketing bullshit, please. Ochs and Jnr as well as F P Journe are closest to where I want to be but for daily use, it’s hard to beat Sinn.

Hawaii (  only been once, not enough)

Really good food.  Thai Food, Mediterranean food, slow food and I’ve upped my  heat capacity to stupid levels. www.extremefoods.com is my best friend:)  How bad is it?  Well, I collect hot sauces now.

Really good cooking ( I do some things well, Erin does way more things well but )

Ghost in the Shell.  I want me some cyberisation:)

Photography ( again )

Maintain an interest in things deathy, 

Archery ( beginner)  Traditional bow.

Media, way too much. some highlights http://www.mariancall.com   a singer/songwriter that’s so good that I  donated monthly to  help pay for the recording of  the new album which is something I encourage everyone that cares about any form of art to do.

http://www.richardcheese.com seen him so many times live and it’s never gotten old,  his band kicks ass too.Sadly he went down the route of . If you don’t believe in the same politics as him you’re not welcome..  saved quite a bit of cash there.

, www.mynameischance.com  ,www.freezepop.com ,  http://www.amandapalmer.net/  white stripes and I started really liking the Proclaimers and  some weird www.slimcessnasautoclub.com.   Added Amy Macdonald,  found out that as much as I disliked Eminem first time around I realized it was more the people into him that I didn’t like at the time, Regina Spektor, Lindsay Stirling and Halestorm.

R K Morgan : Sci-fi  Altered carbon especially.

Nick Cole : CTRL ALT Revolt

Daniel Keys Moran’s  Continuing time series

William Gibson ,   which I missed when I should have read it.

Neal Stephenson , particularly Snowcrash.

Robert Rankin.

G R R Martin  Game of Thrones series  (patiently waiting)

Grant Morrison ( Invisibles, The Filth and countless DC reinventions. )

Orson Scott Card’s  Ender series.

Heinlein,  yeah I was late to that party but am now in attendance:)

So much non-fiction that it hurts.   Omnivore’s dilemma was good and am currently reading  The Gulag Archipelago , everyone worries about Hitler , Stalin was worse.

Seriously recommend  Working Stiff: Two Years, 262 Bodies, and the Making of a Medical Examiner and
Smoke Gets in Your Eyes: And Other Lessons from the Crematory

Still Likes.

motorbikes,firearms , tori, but not live too many shitty  experiences with bad venues, actually no, in the case of the Mesa AZ show it was not the venue it was crap mixing and we actually walked out.  NIN, red headed women, Fish, Dick Dale , black pudding , cider  and things that are sharp or light up:)

Things that are meh:)

No more buffets,  fast food is the last choice , always. healthcare  in the US, they can’t think their way out of a problem.  Insurance is the wrong word, they don’t stop to think why an item is expensive , just that they should be able to afford it.

More in a bit:)

Yes they do, Otto. They just don’t understand it.

New interests, new job, same old bullshit:)

Long Time no see. I’ve been busy over at Time to Win ME  which is my watch contest aggregation site.  I try to find at least one watch, watch related or prize being offered by a watch company and then post it to the site,Twitter and Facebook.  Even if you’re not into watches it’s not a bad way to fill out your Christmas gift bag for those that do.

Time to Win Me

Till next Time.

So we have a report from the codes saying the AVS / ABS failed to connect but they said it was post crash, we say bs it’s pre , and the cause. All I think we can do is wait for more people to suffer this and then join in the bashing.

As I have said this was the second Honda certified car we had that wasn’t deserving of the title. Honda were ZERO help. They really don’t care about how the owner views them and that’s the last car from them , the last motorbike from them and the last product that contains one of their engines. So they don’t care they know they lost a customer already so why invest in keeping us happy ?

I’m on a mission to make wrists more interesting by aggregating  watch contests and giveaways.  E.G., the prize is either a watch, a watch related accessory or is being given away by a Watch brand.

Here you go  www.timetowin.me 

If you could be so kind as to Like our Facebook  page, follow our tweets and best of all enter the contests.

Allstate so far have proven to be useless. E.G they say that with0ut a recall on 09 there’s no reported brake issues.  Despite the fact I am a paying customer of theirs for years   we’re not, apparently, capable of reporting a dead braking system without warning.  Ergo they won’t investigate which was the case of our last phone call.

We’ve lost a lot of money , or will via the deductibe and increased rates, the car is now a salvage,  the car will lose money when we sell it. We have  failed to get anything remotely like the peace-of-mind that buying a low-milage certified vehicle.

That’s nice if you get a chance to take it back to the dealer.

A couple of months old and our Honda Element suffered  a catastrophic brake failure  that resulted in an accident. No warning lights,  just a heavy pedal  on brake once, braked again, got really hard then on the next attempt  to the floor , no brakes and  we now have a sad element and  a sad owner of a CRV that  was the resting place for the Element.  Car hadn’t been back for a service since buying it , e.g., under 2000 miles.

After searching this topic we’ve seen a lot of traffic on  Google  re Accords and the prior year Elements failing in the same way. There’s no recall for 09, unless our car isn’t  really an 09 which would explain why a similar condition would happen to us .  09 Odyssey’s are not exempt from brake-failures  too. Odd that Toyota took so much bashing last year over  what amounted to nothing.

We’re at the start of this process but regardless of what  the dealer/ Honda say this < 2000 mile since certification vehicle was not fit for it’s intended use.

I.E.,  I have nothing new in stock.

Ah Dobh and the original “otter” This otter was stolen from the cinema in Phoenix after he forgot it and wasn’t there on the way back. Yeah I know they pay the cleaning staff little but, hey , bastards

This was his first concert , in a backyard in the Phoenix heat, with Marian Call which is about as good as any first concert memory you’re going to have.

Mini Cooper kept mum. So what if our manual is incorrect. no keys for you

I’m following up on an incident we had with our Mini Cooper S this month and the manner in which it was handled.

While you have the records in the customer service system I will briefly go over the issue. My wife left her key atop a gas pump and drove off. The car gave no warning and 20 miles later it was unable to start ,finally realizing that it didn’t have a key.

The manual states that it will not start without the key being inside it. The dealer, the phone line and the manager this was eventually escalated too all accept that the car starts with the key outside the car. The Mini helpline email address was not helpful (incident 1-1641681520) and referred us to the dealer. The dealer had referred us to Mini so I called.

The first helpline operator I spoke with suggested I read the manual. I did, again, and it says, in unambiguous terms ,that this shouldn’t happen.

He didn’t meet my expectations of customer service ,having run helplines of this nature I’m pretty critical, then again being made to feel like it’s my fault for not knowing how the car operates does that to me. Maybe you can pull the tape and listen?

I called back, had a productive E.G., the antithesis of my first contact and  I was passed onto Anthony. I relayed my concerns that what is apparently a commonly known fact at Mini wasn’t passed on to the owners. The car starts with the transponder several feet away contrary to the manual. He correctly asked what I wanted from this process. I wanted Mini to consider replacing the key or providing it at cost due to what I consider a serious flaw in the implementation of the comfort access feature. The car gave no audible or visual warning that the key wasn’t within range as she drove off.

Anthony got back to us within a couple of days to tell us that Mini would not consider a free key or any consideration re this incident. I thanked him for trying and noted that it seemed very strange and puzzling that a good faith offer from Mini allowing me to buy a key at cost was unavailable to me. To be turned from advocate to adversary over what I see as your product failing to work as described is frustrating. Yes my wife made a mistake but it’s one that should not have been possible had the car functioned per the manual. This was during the day thankfully but it could have been so much worse than losing the $300 for the new key.

I thought that maybe Mini semi-believed it’s motoring family shtick but came away feeling very much chastened by Mini N Scottsdale and the initial phone call to the mini hotline for daring to have a problem with the car. Tack on your poor email response and I have to say that I’ve been underwhelmed by your public facing service.

How does it harm Mini to help us? I know that we liked the Mini so much I sold a great car I really liked to get it. I planned on selling our second one when the Countryman was released but now that’s very unlikely to occur. I’d still like to talk about this because I am curious as to why a key safety feature of your vehicle would deviate so far from the manual’s description.

Regards

clap clap clap,
originally uploaded by Angela Pardo.

Today’s otter of the day comes from Moss Landing near where I used to live in CA and an excellent place to catch rafting otters.

Mini dealers and the Mini helpline say it can.  Ergo you lost they key and you need to buy a new one.  No one is concerned that the car starts without a key in it which is rather alarming. It’s not alarming the car didn’t give a warning that there was no key.

So what we have here is  a car that can be started sans keys  in the car. It looks like any elevation of the key greatly increases the distance at which the car can be unlocked and driven away and the sun roof is likely a big factor. So for fun some experiments will follow.

P.S. Letting us buy the key at cost was rejected. Ok  so for the sake of losing NO money. Result. That’s one less 2012 Clubman sold plus  way more public noise about their customer relations being poor.  Nice going  Mini.

This family thing, it’s a brand.  while they hadn’t fooled me with their story I would have expected they’d at least pretend that they were able to do anything than quote manuals ( incorrectly )  to me.

PPS Anthony’s managers  You have no fucking brains. Seriously  what the hell makes it in your interest to deny a reasonable request ( key replacement at cost) based on your erroneous manual which   some telephone dick told me to go read and understand.  What happened to, ah  I see that’s in error , let me find out rather than being a total  cock about it?

Is there any doubt here that the car should not start when the  key is not in the car, when the key is  five feet away from the car?  Well the helpline , I eventually got to a manager, and asked them to consider that they could be owe me a new key / serious price break on the $300 item because their car is not working as stated. 

That was a few days ago.  

The “new” car ,a 2007 Cooper S, came with a remote key and what’s called a convenience feature in which you do not have to put your key into the slot to start it. E.G.,It can stay in your pocket , your bag or attached to a purse.

Common belief is that the car won’t start without the key being inside the car.  Sadly , as we found out this weekend, that is not the case.  My wife left her purse atop the pump, got in ,  door closed, started car and drove off.   ( ended up having to get a ride then break into the house)

The car gave zero warning that key wasn’t within the car and  20 miles later, car turned off and couldn’t start it again.

No keys , no movement , no nothing!   This is not the behavior I want from a car so I called the local Mini dealer, 2 days after they failed to return my wife’s call , to find out what the parameters of the  keyless start are.  I also sent a note to Mini asking the same.

So far nothing from Mini and an unhelpful  “you’re the only one in 3000-4000 customers to have this problem.”  from the dealer  and an offer to look at it which I will have to take them up  on.

I really want to know why the car wont let you lock it with the key inside, assumption that it knows where the key is in relation to the car, yet will let it drive off without one being present. Surely that’s not that  hard a question for the  people that sell it/ make it?  

   Couple that to the Airbag system that can be harmed just by moving your seat back and it looks like the  LUCAS lord of darkness joke re the state of UK auto electrical  systems has jumped over into the BMW made Mini.

In the meantime…

I am so late doing this I’m practically ashamed.  E.G,   The house only holds about 40 people and , well you think hell 40 people that’s easy Probably so easy that telling everyone would lead to a lot of disappointed folks which I’m still aiming for:)

Marian Call delivers whimsical Alaskan folk funk for the Coffee Counter-Culture. She sounds a little like Joni Mitchell & Regina Spektor raising the child of Jason Mraz & Erin McKeown. Call’s sound is always soulful, honest, and clever, loved by all types — computer geeks, church ladies, teenage thugs, NPR listeners, and urban hipsters worldwide. Marian is currently touring all 50 states and hopes to play for you soon — find more information at http://mariancall.com.

If you like what you hear  then how about hearing it live, like two days from now?

When we originally requested a house concert it seemed plausible. laughably in hindsight, that we could accommodate this at our house.  Thankfully friend and  fellow fan Mandi stepped in to save the day and for this Phoenix and surrounding areas  all you have to do is leave your house on a Wednesday night and come out for live music. 

RSVP to

mandi  AT neuroticbynature.com

For details on where to go, what to bring and how much fun you are going to have.

here we are