Orange Music Team Blog

Caption competition: Russian giant

2009-11-12T11:59:58+00:00

by Simon Glover What's being said as 7ft 2ins Nikolai Valuev exchanges words with his cornerman during his world heavyweight title fight with David Haye? To enter click here and scroll down to the comment form below. You can also enter on your Orange mobile phone via the news channel on Orange World. Click here to see previous winners

Shoplifters of the world...

2009-11-11T14:50:33+00:00

by Alan Tyers The middle-classes, when not high on cocaine, binge-drinking or being given life in prison for getting a parking ticket, are now apparently mad for the shoplifting. A report from snappily-named security and merchandising specialists Checkpoint Systems NCE reckons that shoplifting is up 20% - costing businesses an eye-watering £4.9 billion a year. Says that company’s spokesman: “We are seeing more instances of amateur thieves stealing goods for their own personal use rather than to sell-on. “This is epitomised in the recent uprising of the middle-class shoplifter, someone who has turned to theft to sustain their standard of...

Brown letter day

2009-11-10T14:33:09+00:00

by Alan Tyers The ignoble sport of bear-baiting is alive and well: Gordon Brown has lurched into yet another crisis and his enemies at The Sun are getting stuck in. The PM hand-wrote a letter to Jacqui Janes offering his condolences for the death in Afghanistan of her Grenadier Guardsman son, Jamie. Brown managed to spell her name incorrectly, and made several other spelling (or handwriting) mistakes in the letter. Then - cringe, cringe - he phoned her up to say sorry, she recorded the conversation and handed it to The Sun. Manna from heaven to the Tory-backing boys in...

Berlin should inspire us all

2009-11-09T13:46:04+00:00

by Greg McDonald As world leaders gather in Germany today to mark the 20th anniversary of the fall of the Berlin Wall, the miracle of reunification should embolden us to believe that bold, peaceful, democratic progress is possible when we have the courage to act as if it’s so. For Berlin owes much of its success to precisely that spirit: manifested in the bravery of ordinary Germans who faced down a seemingly unbeatable foe, and to sage German leaders who put long-term security ahead of short-term advantage. In Berlin today, however, world leaders should recognise that peace and prosperity in...

Good Week: Beyonce, Poppy appeal, Colin Firth, Katie Price

2009-11-06T15:01:27+00:00

by Greg McDonald It was a winning week for Beyoncé, as the ‘Single Ladies’ star scooped a hat -trick of gongs at the MTV Europe Music Awards. Collecting her Best Video award, 2009’s Best Female dedicated her success to hubbyie Jay-Z for “putting a ring on it”, and fared rather better than poor Taylor Swift did at the VMAs when you might remember Kanye West making this infamous interruption. It was a proud week for the Poppy Appeal as the British Legion reported that this year’s campaign is on course to raise a record- breaking amount. And although some –...

Bad Week: Afghanistan, David Cameron, Rafa Benitez, David Nutt

2009-11-06T14:51:55+00:00

by Greg McDonald It was another tragic week for the British armed forces in Afghanistan as five British servicemen were murdered by a rogue Afghan policeman. And with polls showing three quarters of Brits now oppose the conflict, and the Prime Minister castigating his allies and countenancing defeat, it was left to the brave widow of repatriated Olaf Schmid to stir British moral courage during a sad seven days. It was a slippery week for David Cameron as the Conservatives’ “cast- iron guarantee” on an EU referendum was cast out when the Czechs signed up to the Lisbon Treaty. Though...

Shame not jail

2009-11-05T14:34:31+00:00

by Greg McDonald The student caught on camera drunkenly urinating on war memorial poppy wreaths deserves the shame and humiliation he will live with for many years to come - but he shouldn’t go to jail. Philip Laing has no excuses. His lawyers paint a picture of a student with a bright future, innocently caught up in a drinking culture and now struck with remorse. But being middle class doesn’t excuse you from equal treatment before the law, any more than downing 10 Stellas excuses you running the next-door neighbour down in the family car. And as for remorse, it’s...

Caption competition: Cameron on the Tube

2009-11-05T14:13:10+00:00

by Simon Glover We asked what was being said as Tory leader David Cameron travelled to Westminster by tube following a walkabout in Ealing, west London? Winner "Sorry to ask... But my butler normally pays" Stewart Beetle Runners-up "Is that you or does it always smell like this?" Diane "Are you getting off with him or going all the way with me?" Paul Smith "London Underground would like to express our apologies for David Cameron, we hope he has not ruined your journey" Oliver Smith Click here to see previous winners

Who is David Cameron?

2009-11-04T14:58:06+00:00

by Alan Tyers PM-in-waiting David Cameron screwed Britain for the first time this morning: it probably will not be the last. In September 2007, Cameron wrote in The Sun: “I will give this cast-iron guarantee: if I become PM a Conservative Government will hold a referendum on any EU treaty that emerges from these negotiations. No treaty should be ratified without consulting the British people in a referendum.” That seems pretty clear to me. Today, he has backtracked from that referendum promise and is attempting to sugar the pill with some tough talk about how he won’t let those nasty...

Mock horror

2009-11-03T12:57:07+00:00

by Alan Tyers The surprising thing about the row between Olympic double gold medal-winning swimmer Rebecca Adlington and the BBC is not that people are queuing up to be offended by Mock The Week panellist Frankie Boyle’s jokes, but that Adlington herself gives a hoot what he thinks or says. Imagine the sheer willpower and strength of character that she must possess to get up before dawn every day of the year, train her guts out and bring home two gold medals at just 19 years old. It’s amazing that a couple of gags on a TV panel show are...