Here’s the thing though. Buying local makes sense.

1. You don’t have to go into the rush at the malls.
2. You can get your purchases delivered to you, or – at least collect them without the rush and trouble for parking at the mall.
3. You can get products that are so good, you might be tempted to keep them for yourselves. Yes cynics, you might be pleasantly surprised by your options.
4. You find something different to the usual fare, so your gift stands out.

Especially if you’re last minute with buying gifts, buying local is super convenient.

When you add those kinds of benefits, you start to feel good about buying local. And, hopefully, after you’ve been so giving, it’ll be reciprocated. (Doesn’t it suck – just a little – when you don’t get gifts for Christmas?)

Here are some local products that would make great gifts. Check out the pix, and click the links to find out more about the products.

I’ll kick things off with the kids, since I always buy gifts for the children in my life first.

Kids

ESP Jr. – Island Babies onesies and tees for kids up to 9.

You can buy them at espjrisland.com (plus you can download free colouring pages for your children), and on Facebook at facebook.com/espjrisland.

They’re also available at Caboodle Gifts – Long Circular Road, D’Caribbean Culture Shack – Piarco, Rainy Days Gift Shop – Ellerslie Plaza, and Peeping Fish – Shoppes @ Westcity – Tobago. ESPjr’s creator, Jeunanne Alkins, can also be found at small goods markets, like Up Market.

Bran Marc – Puzzle Map of Trinidad and Tobago

Find it on Facebook. 

Jewellery

Koko Karibi

I want somebody to buy me this for Christmas (shameless beg). You can view more of Koko Karibi’s gorgeous jewellery on Facebook. 

Cocoa Vintage

We featured Cocoa Vintage’s creator, Crystal Antoine in Outlish back in 2011, and it’s good to see she’s still going strong. Right now, she has some deals, so check them out on Facebook.

Colour Riot Jewellery

If rootsy, matched with artsy, is your friend’s style, Colour Riot might be an option. View more designs on Facebook.

WiBead

You can get this chalk and turquoise earring (first photo) for around $65, or go high-end with this pearls, garnet, labroudite, spotted quartz, and swarovski crystal number for $1,150. I started buying some of WiBead’s pieces in 2008, and bought a piece recently at UpMarket for my granny for her birthday. She loved it. You can also find WiBead on Facebook.

Fashion

Aisling

She has some gorgeous knitwear. Check out Aisling on Facebook.

Christian Boucaud

Christian was a teacher before turning into a full-fledged fashion designer, who has dressed the likes of Anya Ayoung Chee and Destiny Child’s Michelle Williams. What’s great is that she dresses all sizes. Outlish interviewed Christian back in 2010. Three years later, she’s still a crowd favourite. Find her on Facebook.

Designs by LESA G

LESA G crochets anything. She’s got bathing suits, tops, hot pants, headbands…You name it. Makes me wish I’d paid attention more when granny was teaching me to crochet. Check her out on Facebook.

K Fensome clutches

One of our readers suggested this. View more clutches here. 

Foodies

Del Mano

Created by Stefan Grosberg, Del Mano has tasty jellies, pestos, and sausages. If you’ve got foodie friends, they’ll like Del Mano’s gourmet gifts. The shadon beni pesto is popular, but I’ve tasted the melongene pesto, and it is awesome. I plan to stock up on some before year’s end. Find Del Mano on Facebook. It’s also available at Malabar in Maraval Farms Gourmet Shop (Maraval), Blooms and Arties (Diego Martin), and Happy Gourmet (Valpark). You can also call 783-8181.

Music

John John – R&B

John John, who is signed to local record label, Highway Records, is known for his soulful, R&B music. For any music lover, who likes discovering new music, this would be a good option. You can get his CD on Amazon (click here), and iTunes. You can also get it at local outlets – Cleves, Just CDs, Musik Shak, Rhyners , Kams LCM, and Sound Research – Gulf City.

Elan Parle – Jazz

Elan Parle is a favourite on the local, jazz circuit. Visit the Facebook page for more deets. You can also get it at Cleve’s on Frederick Street.

Etienne Charles – Jazz

I’ve personally bought some of Etienne Charles’ albums, and attended his concerts. “Folklore” is still my favourite jam. His new CD, released this year, recently topped jazz charts. Any music/jazz lover can appreciate great music when they hear it. Find out more at Etienne at his website. CDs are available at Cleve’s, Crosby’s, Kam’s, the M Store, Chaud Cafe, Paper Based, and Wrap Works Deli.

Beauty

Amara Organics – Soaps

Amara Organics partnered with local artist Danielle Boodoo-Fortune for a special line of soaps, just in time for Christmas. They’ve also got lots of other scents. You can visit their FB page here.

When it comes to buying local, if you look closer, aka maco a little better, online, you’ll find lots of options. And ask your friends about other local products that they like. Or check out UpMarket, or Things TT. There are a tonne of local options out there. Quality. Local. Options.

There’s no way I could have posted all of the possible options in this post. I had to leave out some others that I loved too. So, don’t beat me up if you don’t see your product, or your friend’s product in this list. Please.

Happy giving, and Merry Christmas to you. And feel free to add suggestions in the comments section.

PS: You can also check out some of these local gifts at UpMarket this Saturday at the Woodbrook Youth Facility.

We found this old video of Andre Corbie giving a hilarious performance of this scenario, in his debut appearance at Calypso institution – Spektakula – back in 2000. Great performance. Check it out.

That’s where Startup Weekend Trinidad and Tobago, a three-day workshop of sorts (emphasis on the work), is aiming to make a difference.

It takes place from May 22nd to 24th, 2013.

Staying true to its motto of “No Talk. All action.” – it will be three days of work, with startup entrepreneurs forming teams to refine their product and develop their startup model. It provides helpful training and real-time feedback for would-be and active entrepreneurs who are seeking inspiration, guidance and improvement.

Each Startup Weekend follows the same process. Anyone can pitch a business idea. Then people vote for ideas, and teams are formed to work on the pitches that received the most votes.

Trinidad and Tobago is by no means its first place for activity. Startup Weekend is a global network of leaders and entrepreneurs on a mission to inspire, educate, and empower individuals, teams and communities. As of November 2012, over 100,000 entrepreneurs have received training through startup weekends. It is not a hackathon or business plan competition.

To learn more about Startup Weekend Trinidad and Tobago (T&T), and find out what attendees can expect, I spoke with one of Startup Weekend T&T’s organisers, Kirk Lashley, who is a member of Startup Weekend’s global network, and a Startup Weekend Chicago alumni and organiser.

This Chicago-based, Trini software developer and technology entrepreneur is also a cofounder of WeDeliver, a same-day delivery service that allows small businesses to compete with Amazon’s quick shipping advantage. Having attended Startup Weekend in Chicago and Brazil, and having met his cofounder at Startup Weekend (SW) Chicago, Lashley is a full-fledged SW evangelist.

The entire Startup Weekend T&T team of organisers includes Dr Kim Mallalieu, Candice Sankarsingh, John Beadle, Gerard Thomas, Abeni MacDonald, Akash Pooransingh, Cathy-Ann Radix, and Alvin Brown.

O: How was Startup Weekend T&T born?

KL: I was sharing my entrepreneurial journey at an impromptu workshop at UWI in December 2012…sharing my journey of Startup Weekend and Lean Startups.

One of the people in the room commented that they had just spent a few days [at] and paid US$300 for a government workshop on entrepreneurship and had learned more from me in the last two hours than they had learned in that entire workshop. The motto of Startup Weekend is “No Talk, All Action”. Someone joked, that’s what we need more of in Trinidad and Tobago.

Another lecturer, Cathy Radix, looked up with all seriousness and asked how do we bring Startup Weekend to Trinidad, as she saw Jamaica was having a Startup Bootcamp, and always wondered how to go about starting one.

The answer was…the local startup ecosystem has to be ready for Startup Weekend, and a local organizer must be trained by Startup Weekend and have attended at least one Startup Weekend elsewhere. There must be enough demand for a Startup Weekend by local entrepreneurs who are trying to startup new types of business and facing challenges.

I was seeing my friends and colleagues back home investigating entrepreneurship…[interest] was reaching a critical mass. Sometime during the workshop, we pulled out our calendars and made rudimentary plans, which cemented themselves over the next five months to create this movement that we have today.

O: I know you’re also a start-up entrepreneur. Tell us about what you’re working on.

KL: So my startup is called WeDeliver. We’re an on-demand, same-day, crowd-sourced local delivery service. Amazon has proved the market for next-day deliveries, but at the same time put the squeeze on neighbourhood merchants.

WeDeliver provides local merchants with the ability to deliver items to their local customers within a short period of time with real-time delivery tracking and 30-minute delivery windows. Imagine you’re expecting a package from TTPost, and imagine they actually sent you a confirmation that said your package was out for delivery. You could be waiting at home for hours on that package, and not having any idea where it is. Imagine if you could open up a tracking page and see exactly where your package is on a map, and be able to communicate with your driver, and you were given a 30-minute delivery window for your item.

Actually, let’s make it better; imagine you can choose that 30-minute delivery window to be whenever you want it, day or night. We’re giving local merchants an edge on Amazon.

One of our customers, a t-shirt printery prints t-shirts in less than an hour, and used to use USPS to ship to their customers. So customers would get their t-shirts in 2-3 days. Now we can offer their local customers the ability to get their t-shirts within an hour. That’s the value we’re adding to merchants.

We’re using regular people to make these deliveries. We say, ordered by you and delivered by your neighbour. So this keeps money in your local neighbourhood. I could talk more about this, but, seriously, you don’t want me to pitch.

O: You mentioned that SW is a startup itself, so funds have been limited. The prizes are a .co.tt domain and a mentor. For the person who might say that they’re not impressed with those prizes, what would you say to encourage them to still attend and pitch their idea?

KL: I’m not that impressed with the prizes so far myself. Okay, we do have a few more up our sleeves. We’ve just been waiting on getting them confirmed in writing. It’s Trinidad after all. People are last minute.

It’s been shown the bigger the prize, we run the risk of attracting the wrong type of attendee and not a true entrepreneur.

O: What’s the aim of Startup Weekend T&T?

KL: While the obvious goal is to launch startups, we’re trying to help entrepreneurs break out of their existing networks and meet new people and get new ideas on how to do things.

We hope that Startup Weekend begins to break down silos between business people, graphic artists, mas and fashion designers and software developers.

We hope to help entrepreneurs realise they don’t have to be Silicon Valley to create awesome, world-changing companies. We want to help teams recognise the value of multidisciplinary collaboration. We want the country to see what talent we have here locally, and the types of startups our country could produce.

We want investors to see the future potential of startups they need to start supporting, and push them to understand digital technology. We hope to inspire a generation of young people who have wanted to try, but just didn’t know where to start.

These are all lofty long-term goals.

O: What are the short-term and medium-term goals?

KL: The short-term win will be that entrepreneurs leave here and have the confidence, the tools and the support network to start their own venture. We want them to stay connected to create a strong support network for other aspiring entrepreneurs. In the medium term, these entrepreneurs will become the leaders of the startup ecosystem.

O: What can people expect to get out of attending the event?

KL: They say it takes a village to raise a startup, and Startup Weekend is where you meet that village. You will meet amazing cofounders, employees, mentors, and people who will possibly invest in you and have a great time.

Startup Weekend follows the lean startup paradigm pretty well, so you learn the lingo of being lean, ideating, iterating, customer discovery, customer development pivoting all while creating a minimum viable product and a pitch deck. What that means is you can expect to leave with product-market fit for your idea.

People can expect to think fast and create quickly. You will learn new tools, which can help you as an entrepreneur or an intrapreneur…Be prepared to be on an adrenaline rush. You will build, you will pivot, your will fail and you will succeed.

O: The name says startup, but some people would be more advanced in their thinking or experience, or would have already ‘started up’. What level/type of entrepreneur would you say Startup Weekend is for?

KL: I think Startup Weekend is best for an entrepreneur or would-be entrepreneur who has been toying around with an idea, but has not yet implemented it…or has implemented it, but is not sure if they built the right thing, or can’t figure out a scalable, repeatable business model. I would say it’s for anyone who is willing to learn, pivot and grow.

I think collectively the community can come up with better answers than one person.

Startup Weekend is not for people with all the answers. I’ve seen an entrepreneur who has sold a multi-million dollar business come back to Startup Weekend to pitch an idea. I’ve seen an angel investor pitch an idea to form a team that he wanted to fund.

Startup Weekend is about immediate feedback from your peers, from coaches and from your customers. If you’d like to do it on your own in 6-18 months, that’s your choice. We’d like you to fail fast, so you succeed faster.

Kirk Lashley (left) hanging out with WeDeliver cofounders and friends at Startup Weekend Chicago. Source: http://www.1871.com.

O: What are some of the opportunities that people waste at Startup Weekend?

KL: Networking. I expect a developer or two to be avoiding eye contact, until the event officially kicks off. Actually, I want to say this is the single, greatest, wasted opportunity at every Startup Weekend by attendees to share their ideas with other and get them excited about what they have to pitch. But it’s also understandable that they still have that the fear that someone is going to steal their idea.

At some events, attendees underutilize the coaches. This is a chance to pick the brain of a senior product designer, an awesome developer, the owner of a local e-commerce site, people skilled in entrepreneurship, etc. People get as much help as they’re willing to accept.

O: The event is called Startup Weekend. Why isn’t it on a weekend?

KL: The first Startup Weekend was actually started on a Wednesday night in the TechStars office in Boulder, CO. Since then it’s been easier to use space and get attendees on weekends, but in places like the Middle East, Startup Weekend usually starts on Wednesday or Thursday to avoid conflict with religious times.

Similarly, we didn’t want to discourage attendees from the USC, Seventh Day Adventist University from attending due to Startup Weekend starting on a Friday night. There’s actually a benefit to [hosting it] during the week…teams can actually talk to potential customers during business hours or weekdays much easier than they could on weekends. Customer validation has always been harder on weekends.

Startup Weekend is a chance to startup. If you’ve been wanting to start something for a long time, and this opportunity is here, the fact that it’s on a weekday or a weekend should make no difference.

O: Do you think it’s worth people taking time-off from work to attend?

KL: I think it’s not only worth the time, I think employers should encourage it, and pay for their employees to attend. We have this wrong mindset that entrepreneurs will quit your job once they get exposed to it. I believe some people just have that entrepreneurial spirit.

Peter Drucker describes an entrepreneur as someone who searches for change, responds to it and exploits opportunities. Albert Shapero says entrepreneurs take initiative, accept risk of failure and have an internal locus of control. That pretty much sounds like the kind of employee that I’d love to have.

Every employer out there who has an employee that wants to attend Startup Weekend should encourage them because the rewards for the employer are greater than the three days they’re not in the office. They could pitch a new product that may find its way in your company, or they may develop a new skill to accelerate their business activities.

Sometimes, you might lose a few people who will realize how easy it is to cross over from employee to entrepreneur. And they make that switch. While it may be initially hard for an employer, losing that person sooner, rather than later when you’ve invested more resources into them would be good for both parties.

O: What advice do you have for people who are going to be pitching their ideas at Startup Weekend?

KL: I’d say:

• Read the pitching outline.
• Network with people.
• Practise your pitch; it’s 60 seconds.
• Ask for the skillsets you need.
• Share your idea with as many people as possible.
• Listen to as many ideas as you can.
• Leave the non-disclosure agreements at home. No legal paperwork is to be signed at Startup Weekend.
• Network with people with those skillsets. People will have different coloured stickers on their nametags. Talk to the people with the colour you need to get on your team.
• Vote early for your favourite pitches.
• Get up and pitch. It’s half about presentation as it is about your idea. Practise enthusiasm.
• Tell me your problem you’re trying to solve, spend less time on the solution. That will change over ‘the weekend’.

To register for Startup Weekend T&T, visit trinidad.startupweekend.org.

Here’s a video that shows two participants’ journey at Startup Weekend Toronto.

I seek my inspiration wherever I can find it. Facebook (who ever came up the status of “It’s complicated” should be knighted), Google, and, of course, movies. My Movietowne research tells me that all I need for a great case of happily ever after is to be chased by aliens, robots, or men with chainsaws. My perfect man will save me, find a moment for hot, sweaty sex, and, once we survive, we’re set for life. (That’s unless I refuse to share my board when our ship sinks.)

Recently, in my quest to broaden my relationship expertise, I’ve stumbled across even more relationship gold in the form of Trinidad’s 2013 Soca songs, and from what I’m told, musicians get more booty than the average Joe or Josann, so after listening intensely this year, I felt moved to share the four, most important relationship tips, given by our very own Soca gurus.

What to do when a man actually wants to talk
In the song “Manager”, Ms. Nadia Batson’s advice to us ladies is to simply shut communication down! Who is this man to try to have a conversation about what we’re wearing, where we’re going, or how we style our hair? Don’t ask him if these jeans make your butt look small! (We’re Caribbean women, we like big buts and we cannot lie.) How dare he use the word “Cutex” in this decade? “Run away from that, girl, get away from that!” Nadia instructs.

In simple words, ladies, show your man the talk-to-the-hand sign, whenever he tries to talk to you. Listen to nothing he has to say about where you’ll be or where you’re going. That’s your manager’s job, not his! So what if you get kidnapped, and he can’t describe what you were wearing. Shut him up, and your relationship will really grow!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oR7A3meb2oo

Accept your limitations and learn to share
Blaxx takes his time in “No Getaway” to instruct us ladies that we need to learn how to wine all day. Not have productive lives, be good mothers, or get degrees. Just wine and when he gets to the [masquerader] band, then “no woman in the band nah get away!” No need to be clingy ladies, for according to one of my sources, who shall remain nameless, King Solomon had 700 wives and 300 concubines, so let the man wine on everybody.

Shower him with your understanding and acceptance, since honestly you know that even if you load up on a five-hour energy drink, the most non-stop winning you’ll get is well, five hours! So if your man desires that you “wine all day” and push back the bumper, until he says OK, cut the man some slack and don’t be selfish. Let him chase all the women in the band, because mommy did say that sharing was good.

There’s a place for random friends with benefits
If a man sings a song called “Single Forever”, you know he believes in baby steps when it comes to relationships and taking it slow is good advice. Right? So when Soca/Chutney singer Ki says, “I looking for a girlfriend, dat do not want a boyfriend, who looking for a toy friend”, we ladies must sit up and take notice. So girls, if you are tired of the ‘toy friend’ who’s tucked away in the back of your closet, this is relationship advice for you. Go to a party, hook up with a random stranger, and be his friend for the night. That should end well.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lGajp4Wp-R8

Mind reading is key to the success of your relationship
Now this piece of relationship advice is for the guys. You get to take a look into what makes a woman tick, and her complexities. You’ll recognise her ability to let you know that if things aren’t working, if she’s not getting what she wants – is all your fault. In “We doing this Owah?” Fay-Ann Lyons wants to wine, but she can’t. Why? Because you, the man, the decision maker, is just hovering around the bumsee.

She accuses you of just being too damn chatty. Too much talk, and not enough action! She’s waiting for you to make the move. She’s not about to ask for that she wants. She’s not about to let you know what needs to be done to make this thing work. Nah, you’ve got to sharpen up your telepathy skills. You’ve gotta learn to read her mind, for your relationship to work.

So if you see your woman wining, that means you wine too. Well it could mean that, or it could mean, “Don’t touch me! I’m wining alone tonight but who cares, you’ve gotta figure that out, on your own!”

You would think that a woman would be happy to find a man she can talk too, but no sireee. Shut up fellas, or, at least in this case, wine while yuh talking.

I have gone to great lengths to analyse the wisdom hidden within the lines of some of this year’s Soca offerings, but I must remind myself that relationships are complex. For centuries, people have tried to get this thing right, and desired a life partner and a love that works. We long to find that special someone, the one who “completes us”. (Ok so I rolled my eyes there; I ent that mushy.)

But alas, in our quest for that lasting relationship, that perfect step-by-step guide to good loving, we should remember to take all advice with a pinch of proverbial salt. I’m told by the lucky few that a relationship works, when there is understanding, commitment and many days when you simply stare off into space, as your partner complains. So after listening to this year musical offerings, the jury might still be out on whether the best relationship gurus are right here, among us, disguised as Soca artistes. What do you think?

Image credit: sassnation.com

We are the millenials. We are Generation Y. We are ambitious, if impatient. We are easily bored, and even more easily distracted. We want to retire early and travel around the world, but please, not in that order. And well, we want lots and lots of money. We have become convinced that these, our deepest desires, can only be realized through the doors of entrepreneurship.

Those who aren’t trying to invent the next Snuggie are flipping properties. Those who aren’t setting up shop in Silicon Valley are setting up stores or recording tracks in home studios and selling their CDs at the side of the road. But we are in need of a massive reality check. And since we like things fast, I’ll make it quick.

It’s Not for Everybody
Really. It isn’t. Most of us have probably heard Jay-Z’s now infamous homophone: “I’m not a businessman, I’m a business, man!” Yes, Jay-Z, dais de ting self.

The self-employed will often tell you that there is no harder job than working for yourself. Yeah, some of us can rise to the occasion. Others among us, though, need to question what we really want to be doing at six o’clock on a Friday evening – working on a business plan or relaxing, beer in hand, in somebody’s corner bar?

It’s not Fast Or Easy
Come on millenials, allyuh know how we like things quick. Granted, Pinterest and Dropbox, with their millions of downloads and users in mere months, would have us believing that the long, bumpy road to success is so 1975. But that’s the thing with us, the members of Generation Y. We like the success story. The glitz.

Many business owners catchin’ dey nenen, but don’t have the gall to admit it. The failures and setbacks are glossed over, if not completely ignored, and the achievements are heralded. Kind of like how we do on Facebook. And because the masses aren’t privy to our setbacks, along the way to becoming business owners, we see entrepreneurship as the quick-fire and certain way to fulfilment. The typical millenial would skim over the fact that J. K. Rowling was on welfare, depressed and suicidal before she conceived the story of the boy whose name would be known around the planet. Throw in the fact that she was rejected by 12 publishing houses. Twelve! Had that been some of us, Harry wouldna’ even see the doors of the Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry.

You Can Be Happy in a “Nine to Five”
And quite frankly, for Trinis, it’s more like an “eight to four” with plenty ole talk and skylarking in between. But we, the millienials, would try to guilt one another into thinking that being comfortable with being an employee means you aren’t being innovative enough, and will never find true happiness. And we’ll try to do it with our new way of showing the world that we are profound and philosophical: social media. We impress others with statuses like “Good things come to those who wait, but only what’s left by those who hustle”, and by touting #illsleepwhenimdead.

Well hear what, some of us want to sleep. Now! Some of us just don’t want to be bothered with the responsibility of being a ‘bawse’, or care to pour the contents of our fledgling savings account into inventing the next big thing. It doesn’t mean we are any less ambitious or aspirational. For some of us, the extent of our entrepreneurial endeavours is bringing back a suitcase of outlet clothes from the States, jacking up the price some, and selling to family and friends. And that’s okay!

You Can Do It
Paradoxical after all I’ve just said, right? What can I say…the reality check goes both ways. The ole people say what is for you is for you. If you have the heart of an entrepreneur, if you’re a creative genius whose talent makes you a virtual cash cow, then honour that. Be it renting out a cute two-by-four and doing nails, or building the successor to Instagram.

If is one thing I admire about this generation, it’s that we don’t know the meaning of the word impossible. We revel in naysayers telling us our dreams are too grandiose and that we hanging we hat where we hand cya reach. The next time they dare tell you that you can’t make that startup a reality, feel free to offer them a quote from the enigmatic millenial, Trinidad James, CEO of Gold Gang Records: “Don’t believe me just watch.”

Image credit: http://hustlinallday187.tumblr.com/ask

Regardless of what you think, Americans’ belief in their greatness is the reason why they walk into any competition, acting as if a win is tantamount to being a patriot who battled in war. They’re protecting their country’s self respect and pride every time they compete. They’re protecting their right to achieve their dreams. They’re upholding their conviction that they should be a shining example to the rest of the world about dignity, determination and power.

Watch most Hollywood-made movies. America saves the day, and the hero is American. Why? Because America is great. It’s a beacon of hope. Listen to any speech given by a top official and you’ll hear it. America is the greatest nation on the planet – and even in the wider universe if you count its role in kicking aliens’ asses in every movie.

Before President Barack Obama took office, I never listened to US presidents’ speeches. Okay, I listened to Clinton’s speech, when he insisted that he did not have sexual relations with Monica Lewinsky. But, like many other people across the globe, Obama captivated me, in a way that not even my own presidents or prime ministers have.

Since Barack Obama sprang into the spotlight on his first campaign to become President, I started listening to his and other public officials’ speeches. One thing that struck me was the consistency with which most people claim that America is the greatest nation in the world.

Would it make us strive for greater? Would it boost our pride, sense of nationalism, and love for “sweet T&T”? Would it stream into our consciousness and stick, making us believers in our country and ourselves? Would it make people who represent us at international competitions feel more confident? Of course, this sort of identity would need to be backed by governments investing in people to ensure that they have the tools and training to operate successfully on the world stage.

Saying that we’re the greatest doesn’t mean we’d actually become the greatest, but like any sportsman will tell you, it’s all about using the hype to drive your intentions.

Yes, our politicians aren’t progressive. Yes, we have Government ministers who publicly state – without a stutter – that activists on hunger strikes should hurry up and die. Yes, crime is plastered across newspapers’ front pages. Yes, we suck at being green. Yes, we don’t stand up for serious issues – as a people. Yes, we don’t have systems and organisations that support entrepreneurship and innovation, and don’t focus on diversifying the economy. We’re not that great. And we know it.

But let’s consider the merits of America’s mantra. While claiming greatness may seem like a cocky position to take, it’s also a good one. This sort of identity formation is what has propelled America as a superpower, even at its weakest moments. It has made being great its objective in every task, and helped it fire back at critics of its ‘exceptionalism’, while boasting of its industry leadership in technology, science, and other areas.

That’s why Jamaica’s dominance at the Olympics is enough to piss off Carl Lewis, and many others, who don’t believe in the power of Caribbean prowess – and are upset that Jamaica has ended USA’s dominance in top athletics events. Coincidentally, I’ve heard that one reason Jamaica performs so well is because its people genuinely love their country and believe in their potential to be great. And they’ve got icons to support that belief – Bob Marley, Usain Bolt, Merlene Ottley, and others.

Let’s revisit Obama for ten seconds. While he believes in America’s Declaration of Independence, which claims that God bestowed America with unalienable rights, he’s been heavily criticised by Republicans for seeming to be “insufficiently willing to assert the supremacy of the American way of life”. But that’s beside the point. Does Obama absolutely believe in the America is the greatest nation in the world rhetoric?

“I believe in American exceptionalism, just as I suspect that the Brits believe in British exceptionalism and the Greeks believe in Greek exceptionalism,” he once said.

So, hey, we can believe in Trinbagonian exceptionalism too – the same way we believe that only Trinis know how to party hard and still go to work the next morning (or not).

Maybe this belief in greatness is something we should have borrowed, along with every other aspect of American pop culture. We’d have to do it in a way that wouldn’t totally turn off our Caribbean neighbours (wait…we’ve already done that) who already think Trinis are cocky. But…if our aim for greatness leads to better systems and cooperation, which invariably sometimes benefits them, maybe they’ll forgive our pronouncements.

I imagine that this kind of philosophy – not the extremist notion that God blessed your nation alone with gifts – but the one where you believe in your potential for and achievement of exceptionalism is what truly builds a nation. A nation is something bonded by shared values and beliefs. Is my country just a country, or is it a nation? These days, to me, it’s just a country.

Do you really believe that your country is great? How do you prove that your country is great? You have to be great too. People have to believe in themselves. Not just role models and icons. You have to believe in your own greatness. Never underestimate your excellence, and strive to achieve it. Do it as an individual; then let it spread to your social circles. Make the desire for greatness contagious.

Maybe we need to overtly demonstrate belief in the already established greatness of some of our countrymen, and the potential of ourselves and others. This isn’t about becoming the greatest nation on Earth; it’s about becoming a nation that consciously strives for greatness. Even if we don’t fully achieve it, hopefully it will land us several notches above mediocrity. Let’s just say we are great for the sake of motivating ourselves to do the work to become better. If we switch the dialogue to what we can achieve, maybe the tides will change, and we will have more to celebrate, than criticise. What do you think?

Image credit: bleacherreport.com

“Yuh finish yuh homework yet?

“No Daddy.”

“I told you yuh have to be serious. What number you reach on? You have to revise vocabulary after. I tell you exam is serious. You go ahead and laugh with yuh aunt. She cah save yuh from cuttail yuh know!”

Marriage, to me, is a sign of responsibility. It symbolises having to set routines, maintain them, cater to someone else – whether it’s your spouse or children, and manage a household.

As a single person, I’m happy to still be able to wake up at whatever time I want, and not have someone else expecting me to make them breakfast, lunch, and dinner – on time. I’m free. And my love for tabanca music (aka sappy or sad love songs) never tricks me into thinking that marriage is the only happily ever after for all of mankind.

Last year, my younger brother got married, and that left me, the only girl in the family, the focus of the question, “When yuh going to get married?” – from random acquaintances and family. Even my then seven-year-old niece asked me at the reception, “So who’s going to get married next? You?” Well look ting! Society even has young children buying into expectations. You would have thought that she had overheard my elder brother’s godfather – many years before – commenting that I was a beautiful bridesmaid (at that wedding), so he expected me to be an even greater beauty, as a bride. Such a subtle reminder that, as each sibling gets married, the other is expected to pick up the baton of matrimony.

Thankfully, my mother – despite her random mentions of hope that I will one day find a good husband and give her some grandchildren to ‘spoil’ (doh mind she already has more than enough) – doesn’t pressure me about marriage. And she doesn’t look at me with disdain – like an old neighbour whom I met at the roti shop one day, who proudly boasted that her daughter, who was also my age, 32, already had three children, and was currently pregnant with her fourth. When she enquired about my reproductive score, I told her that I had no pikney to feed. She looked at me as if I had just told her I had an extra nipple. I laughed, because Lord knows I could not imagine having to run a magazine and a communications training consultancy, and still having time to hear my own thoughts, while minding four children. Why do people act like you’ve said you have leprosy, when you say you’re single, after a certain age?

Honestly, I’m not that bothered by questions about when I’m going to get married – because all of my siblings – all men – are married. The reason I say “not that bothered” is because I don’t feel ‘ahow’ about being single at 32. I do feel that it’s damn nonsense that people feel as if getting married is a life achievement that I have to tick off. Really people. I thought we had modern thoughts about modern life. My ‘botheration’ with the question is, why allyuh still askin’ me dat? Why allyuh askin’ my mother that question when you see her? Why are people curious about my (or your) marital status? Yes, humans are social beings who love companionship, but some of us manage to be well adjusted to single life, and happily satisfied with our lot in life, while still being open to meeting that special someone.

And when people ask me what I’m waiting for, I just laugh. But let’s count the reasons I’m not married as yet.

1. I eh ha’ no man to consider for the precious role of husband.

2. I rarely go out, so I don’t meet new people.

3. Sometimes, people love each other, and things don’t work out.

4. I’m not like some women who constantly look for romance.

5. I eh marryin’ jes for marryin’ sake, for somebody to make me buy Panadol Ultra all de time so.

I know that some people are constantly pressured by their family to get married. I’ve heard stories about people who I attended university with who rushed into marriage, at the prompting of anxious mothers, and were unhappy. But why feel pressured? Fight the power. Or why get jealous, when an old acquaintance walks up to you, and immediately tells you that she got married earlier in the year, and was now househunting with her husband? That actually happened to me – the story, not the jealousy. I felt sorry that the only thing she found worth telling me about was her marriage and dreams of a white, picket fence, or, a concrete fence with barbed wire – especially when I was clearly trying to keep the conversation to: “Hi, nice to see you. I’m getting a hot chocolate here. Bye.” So I politely nodded, extended congrats, and went along with my business.

But it shows you how some people still view marriage as validation…as an achievement. I sensed that part of her sees it as such – just by the way she relayed her good news.

If you find yourself increasingly surrounded by married friends and siblings, you might find the pressure closing in like those crushing walls you see threatening to end the life of your favourite action hero. Maybe, you just really want to be married. And there’s nothing wrong with that.

I don’t feel as much pressure, because some of my brothers have already provided grandchildren, and so passing on genes does not fall solely on me. And I’ve always been a core part of my nieces’ and nephews’ lives – with school pickups, homework sessions, fun trips and more – so my biological clock doesn’t tick tock. I guess if I had three sisters who were married, instead of three brothers who were married, I might have felt like an old maid. But I not old, and I doh clean. Ask my mother!

Some women feel it, if their younger sister got married before them, especially if all the extended family could do is ask yuh, “When yuh getting’ marrid gyul?” After a while, it may become tiresome, or even humiliating. Do you think it’s easier to cope as an unmarried sibling, if it’s just the men who are married, as opposed to feeling the underlying, subconscious competition between sisters who will be judged by family? Is it easier for men to find a mate? I’ll deal with that last question in another article soon.

For people who are unhappy or bothered by still being single and dread that judging look they get, when people interrogate them about their marital status, what can help them to come to terms with it? A blowup doll to hug at night?

My friend Simone says: “You have to love yourself enough to know that nothing is wrong with you…and I think that is where the problem lies. You might worry that people will say, ‘Look is the ugly sister not married’…you know people like to real talk shit. But remember you may be alone, as not in a relationship, but continue to maintain a healthy social life, especially if you still live with family. Go to events, eat dinner together and continue to bond because that relationship should never be neglected whether or not you are single. Family support and time together helps make up for not having that second person.”

For those whose immediate family pester you about your status, you might have to rely on moral support from friends.

Being the only unmarried sibling in my family hasn’t been an unhappy status for me. My personal philosophy is that God didn’t put everybody on this Earth to multiply, if you get married – I have nothing but best wishes for you – and you should try to be happy regardless of what path your life takes. I’m not concerned about my marital status, so I don’t see why other people should be.

Image credit: nikkiandthecity.wordpress.com

Looks apart, for Trinidad’s Carnival, you’ve got to navigate things like logistics and love – and this is where the not-so-obvious resolutions reveal themselves.

I’ve heard stories about some of the antics people get up to, and figured that somewhere…out there…under the pale moonlight…and under the scorching sun, those who’ve found themselves in ticklish situations, know the situations they want to get themselves in, and those they want to avoid. And therein lies my inspiration for this list of resolutions worth considering.

Let me kick things off with a situation that can only be described as commess.

Standing up to your boyfriend/girlfriend

Carnival is colour. Carnival is mas. But Carnival is also the time when people like to play de arse. Some people use Carnival as an excuse to misbehave, without any accountability.

I’ve heard of instances where people disappear for Carnival. One woman told me that every Carnival, her man – who was usually by her side every day – would disappear for about two weeks, with hardly a call or flare. Then he’d reappear after Carnival, as if everything was normal. No answers about what he was doing, where he was, or why he didn’t return phone calls. And he got away with it, for several years, until they broke up.

This is a clear case of someone wanting to be single for Carnival. But depending on who you’re with, that won’t fly. I know a guy whose girlfriend broke up with him, because he would just catch a vaps and go to fetes with his boys, without telling her or inviting her. He didn’t answer his phone either. The first time it happened, she quarrelled and he promised to not do it again. But he did. After a few repeats, she had had enough and called it quits, because she felt disrespected.

Ladies and gentlemen, if you want your relationship to last, during this season of feting, revelry, sexual freedom, and lots of alcohol consumption, know which boundaries are absolutely not up for crossing…and don’t cross them. And for the soft-hearted peeps out there, don’t let the fact that Valentine’s Day is right after Carnival give your significant other a convenient excuse to shower you with gifts and make you forget their indiscretions.

Decide to not take their crap, or – if you have the energy – control yuh property.

Remember when Iwer used to make songs that had a point?

On that note…

Not staying up all night watching Soca Monarch

I enjoy liming at home with friends and family to watch the live show, but it’s just too long. I can’t imagine why a foreigner would stay up all night, watching Soca Monarch online. And this Trini is definitely not doing it again this year.

For Soca Monarch, you could go eat pelau, brush your teeth, take a bath and a nap, and still reach back by your TV in time to catch the next performance. When will this torture end? Organisers…tighten the show nah. Tell all the early acts of dance troupes and the like that they’ll be moved to Best Village, and hire a producer who knows how to decrease the wait between acts. Oh and get some better hosts. Find some average Joes and Janes on Twitter and hire them as commentators. People tweeted some hilarious stuff last year. I got most of my jones from joining in the fun on my Twitter feed. (Shout out to my Twitter peeps.)

Word is that the organisers are trying to streamline the show this year, so let’s see if it really happens.

Staying within your Carnival budget

Did you plan to either only attend fetes or play mas, or play mas and attend only three fetes, but by now you’re at least $1,500 over your budget, because your friends ‘chain you up’ to go fete after fete after fete? Friends may carry you, but they often don’t pay your bills. No one is coming to help you clear your credit card for all those outfits you bought. Stick to your financial lane, and don’t feel ashamed to tell someone you’re not shelling out money, because you can’t afford it.

Talking to the hottie you see every year

This worked out quite well for one of my close friends, who has since married her hottie. She wined on him, then spoke to him. The morale of the story is that sometimes you see the same people every year. Some of them pique your interest. Talk to dem nah! You never know…they might be your happily ever after, or that story about the psycho man or woman who stalked you on Carnival Monday and Tuesday.

Booking your holiday way in advance

For those of us who are not into Carnival and find ourselves at home, and bored, during the Carnival weekend, we always regret not making plans earlier, especially when we try to make last-minute vacation arrangements and hear that flights, ferries, hotels and guestrooms are all booked up. Did you let that happen to you again this year? I didn’t. I will be throwing my own fete in Tobago – music not provided by mosquitoes. Air condition yo!

Losing weight

I mentioned this earlier, but it’s worth repeating for the lazy and undisciplined among you (I should really say us, because I fall into this category of gym haters). Some of you do the smart thing and work out all year. Some of us wait until two months before Carnival, if not later, to really get serious, when – objectively – we’d need at least a full year to look however it is we want to look. We still have a few weeks to join a bootcamp, or live on callaloo. So get to it.

Get in yuh section early

One of my friends has the last-minute-rush-to-get-in-a-section routine down pat. She saunters into a mas camp – not one of the overly popular ones, but still well patronized – and takes whatever will fit her. Luckily, she’s mostly skin and bones, so getting a tiny, leftover costume is relatively easy – and a steal, if she gets a discount.

But if you know that you just cannot stay way from mas, why go through the last-minute stress? Yeah you might get through, but is the begging and bad attitudes from mas camp customer service people who make style on you worth it? Okay…I can hear the mas addicts shouting, “Yes!” Nooooo. Be decisive, and get in yuh section early.

What about those of you who organised yourselves long time, and still end up in the last-minute stress, because a friend begged you to help them find a costume? What do you do? Help them one year, then tell them, “Organise yuhself early next year eh, ‘cause I not goin’ through dat stress again!”?

Get tickets in hand

I know some of us are spontaneous. Ask us – on Monday – if we want to go a fete this Saturday, and we’ll be like, “Nah I good.” But check us back on Saturday, and we’re on Facebook, WhatsApp and BBM, in a frenzy, asking if people have tickets, hoping that we won’t end up stuck at home, ‘sucking salt’, because we failed to plan.

If you know there’s a particular, hard-to-get-tickets-for fete, like “Vale”, get them early. Or else you’ll end up with what my cousin calls “a massive hard luck”.

Moving like a veteran

Mas veterans know that they have to walk with needle and thread, safety pins, and whatever else may save them from wardrobe malfunctions on the road. But every year, like a virgin, someone plays mas for the first time. Even some veterans get caught unprepared by some new trick courtesy of Murphy’s law. So walk with your reinforcements, or know where people offer on-the-spot ‘fix-ups’ on the road (yes, that’s a cool money-making idea).

Resolving to have the best Carnival ever requires planning your logistics, rallying your crew, and misbehaving without regrets. If you find yourself missing out on some of the action, maybe it’s time you created an official Carnival resolutions list. Where should you start? What are some of the things that you always forget to get or do every Carnival? If they’re important to you, make them happen.

Image credit: time.com

1. In my almost two years of consistent running, I can count on one hand the number of men I’ve seen running in tights. If I were to take me out of that equation, the list gets even shorter.

2. It is practically impossible to find/buy tights at any of the local running stores. I’m not talking about the ones men would usually wear under a shorts (of those I also have quite a few) – I’m talking about running tights that are meant to be worn alone. In fact, over the past two years, I’ve only seen about eight such tights on sale – and I own five. There is no such discrimination on women’s tights though; they come in a myriad of styles, colours and brands. And there are some women that SHOULD NOT wear tights in public – which I referred to in an earlier post.

3. It’s the weird look (mainly from men) I sometimes get, as I trot around town in them. It’s not a negative look, but it’s the kind of look you get if you wear shorts and a tank top in the dead of winter…a slightly bemused look you’d give a weirdo that seemed to have fallen out of the fashion bubble.

Now, I usually don’t care what people think of my dress code, but some days I choose, or choose not to wear my tights, depending on when and where I run – just to keep the peace. Generally I’m well covered, and recently bought a few shorts to wear over them, sometimes, when my running top doesn’t cover all the ‘junk’, but on a hot day (which is practically every day here), it isn’t always practical.

But I love my tights – for good reason too:

1. I’m fascinated by compression technology. I believe it helps me recover faster from long and tempo runs, although medical evidence is still out on that one. I’m a bit of a techie, so – any kind of tech associated with running – I’m willing to try. I actually stopped wearing my Adidas calf sleeves with shorts on my normal runs, because the stares have just been too much, and I’ve been told I look like an alien in them.

2. They look good. Now, I’ll be the first to admit that I don’t have the best man legs. In fact, they’re pretty skinny by most standards, which I also blogged about before. But in tights, my legs look particularly badass, if I say so myself.

3. I’m a Superhero. I’ve always harboured a desire to be a superhero, and with my tights and awesome running powers (on a good day), Superman and Batman got nuthin’ on me. Really I do feel pretty superhuman when I run, and the tights just play into that role. I draw the line at running in a cape though – even if it’s a novelty race (on this I agree fully with Edna “E” Mode from “The Incredibles”).

So what does this all mean? Nothing really, other than I like my own sense of style, and I take it pretty seriously, whether I’m running or not.

After a recent trip to London, I’ve fallen in love with cardigans, which I wear almost religiously when I’m out working with clients, doing training and the like – even though it’s ridiculously hot here most of the time. I’m saved by the fact that:

1. Most employers have the AC on ridiculously cold in their offices, so it actually makes sense to employ layering.

2. I’ve got a lot of compliments on my style – especially when I meet with female executives (which account for 99% of my client base, as I work in human resources).

But I digress; this is about tights. I started feeling all mopey about my love of tights, and my battle not to fit into anyone’s idea of what a man should wear while running (it’s all about me, right?), but my world was shaken yesterday – in a good way. As I was about to begin my run, a guy ran past me. He looked to be in his late fifties, was in pretty good shape (which I deduced from the fact that he just ran up Chancellor Hill, and had a better physique than mine), AND HE WAS WEARING TIGHTS. The kind I would wear, if I could find them to buy locally.

It was near the end of the road, so pretty soon he turned back and ran past me again. He must have seen the look of love and admiration in my eyes, because he gave me a hearty greeting amidst the pants for breath, after running uphill for 3 km – he even wished me all the best for the season. That does it – I’m rocking my tights.

I even contemplated stripping of the shorts I had on to run in the knee-length compression tights I had on underneath, but because of the top I had on, the junk would have been unduly exposed, and I had a vision of my wife divorcing me if she knew I ran in that. She generally approves of my running kit – once I’m appropriately covered – no need to advertise the goods, since I’ve been ‘off the market’ for the last eight and a half years.

So there it is. If you’ve ever wondered why I’ve posted mildly inappropriate pics of myself wearing tights on this blog (like in this post) – well now you know why… and I’m not gonna stop, so get used to it…(or not).

Republished with permission from jeremyrunblues.tumblr.com

This is a big step for me – this celebrating Christmas thing. Last year, I wanted none of it – people, pastelles (OK, no. That’s a lie.), presents, pine trees, and any of the cheer they are all associated with in December. Some might suggest I needed some prayers. ‘Tis the reason for the season, after all. However, the spirit world and I were at odds too.

December 16, 2010, my mother’s heart failed her, and she died alone in our family home. She had spent the tenth day before Christmas buying “all kynah dotishness” in a PriceSmart located in west Trinidad. That night we had what turned out to be our last conversation, laughing about her weakness for bulk-buying-encouraging-big-box stores. Most of her purchases would still be in the car trunk to greet me, when I made the journey home to bury her. She had bought enough Carnation evaporated milk to make ponche-de-creme every month for the upcoming year, even though it wasn’t her drink of choice. She was laid to rest on December 21.

Mummy had begun the Christmas chores of washing everything in sight, which meant the house was in a disarray. Worst of all, it smelled of nothing. No hot ochro and rice, with plenty pigtail. No lingering Estée Lauder perfume from the night before. Not even bleach. By the time Old Year’s Night hit, I couldn’t drink the champagne at my disposal fast enough.

My mother loved Christmas for three main reasons: the smell of ham and fresh bread (that someone else gifted to us), the lights (Ooooh. Gooood. That woman did love some icicle lights!), and the runway of merriment that it provided towards her real doux-doux, Carnival.

That’s why I couldn’t bring myself to celebrate Christmas without her, after the first anniversary of her death. I put my friends and family on notice, delivered presents weeks in advance, refused Christmas dinner invitations, and booked a seven-day cruise that kept me out of reach until the dreaded day.

“Yuh sure you want to do that?” asked my friend Rejeanne with concern, when I shared my plan to stay home alone on Christmas Day, and watch whatever dregs my cable-less TV had to offer. I wasn’t opposed to holiday movies – after all it was all make believe, and required no interaction on my part. Even my partner respected my wishes, making it easier to stand my ground.

Grief is a real killjoy. Statistics show that approximately 150,000 people die around the globe each day. Yet, during the holiday season, the death of a loved one seems to leave a wound that is more raw and slower to heal. Those in the path of the bereaved are torn between celebrating and consoling.

So was I happy with my choice to put the kibosh on Christmas that first anniversary? Yes. I was sad and wanted to be okay with that. From the day Mummy died, all I heard from friends and family – with the best of intentions – was, “Be strong!” And while I discovered the kind of strength it takes to deal with the sudden death of your way-too-vivacious-to-be-gone mother, I needed a break. I know they were just doing their best to support me, but I am grateful that I was also able to express what I needed to do to support myself.

I can think of one more attribute for grief. It’s a personal thing. The ebbs and flows are completely dependent on the person having the experience. And even if you haven’t experienced a personal loss, you can rely on your compassion skills for guidance. You don’t have to say and do the “right” thing – or say and do anything at all. Just be open and accessible.

Lately, Mummy has been occupying my dreams a lot, as the second anniversary of her death approaches. Some dreams paint imaginary events, as if she were still here. In the last slumber-induced episode, she was dressed head to toe in an African Carnival costume, chipping behind her beloved steelband, Starlift. Others take me back to the day of her funeral…Seeing her in the coffin for the first time, and panicking through wretched cries that the gold hoop earrings I chose for her weren’t visible. (She never left the house without earrings.) Peering out at hundreds of faces my eyes couldn’t focus on, as I read the eulogy. Standing by the six-foot-deep grave, when I had requested nine. Suddenly the Triniology – he gimme ah six for a nine! – all made sense.

Planning a funeral in a Trinidad wrapped up in Christmas preparations is no easy feat. The other three feet for the grave never materialized due to the seasonal skeleton staff in the Woodbrook/Mucurapo Cemetery. A couple of opportunistic gravediggers offered their services on the spot, which of course came with an on-the-spot premium price and a request for grog. I declined.

Some call the November/December death-wave a cleansing to make room for new life. Maybe some are onto something. My cousin’s daughter was born two days before Mummy, her grandaunt, made way for her.

For those reading this, praying for the next two weeks without their beloved to pass, consider this: the time it takes to heal passes with certainty, even though it’s uncertain how long that really is. All you can do is be kind to yourself. Pay attention to what your mind, body, and spirit are telling you. Listen. Share your wishes with those closest to you. I’m glad I did. Now Eve and I can get our Christmas on this year with lights that would make Mummy smile.