Overly Fabulous

10 People Who Should Voice TomTom GPS Systems

noreply@blogger.com (mizliz) — Sun, 11 Jul 2010 01:39:00 +0000

(Mature Language Later On)

This news made my day:

With more than a few Star Wars nerds in-house here at CNET, our collective interest was piqued when TomTom made Darth Vader available as a celebrity VoiceSkin for its GPS navigators. When protocol droid C-3PO was announced as the second voice, we thought, "Come on, nobody likes Threepio!" Today, TomTom announced the VoiceSkin that we've all been waiting for. (No, not Chewbacca or R2-D2; those guys don't even speak English.) We're talking about Jedi Master Yoda.

Read story at the source, you must.

Yoda is a voice on a GPS.
Cue the "Stupid jackass, you are. Missed exit, you did" jokes and whatnot.

Anyway, this got me thinking.
10 Other People Who Should Voice TomTom GPS Systems , arranged by how funny I found myself to be at that moment.

10. Ozzy Osbourne
oshhsohhsohs yougottadosudffh turn rite here, oshfoiufiidofjfcoconutwhaitdij wheres my dog? my dog? SHAAAROOONNNN.

9. My mother
What’s GPS stand for? What do I press? What if I break it? Where am I going? Why is it yelling at me!?

8. My grandmother
Turn right, here! No, not there! That place has terrible eggs. And they’re horribly overpriced. I got a ham sandwich there once and it cost more than the gas to get there did. I think we should go to that nice place on the corner of…*turn off GPS*

7. LeBron James
I have decided, after a long discussion, um, that my heart is here, but my decision still isn’t final and, um, we still have 45 minutes of this decision left and, uh, I’ve decided to take my talents to exit I-34 and turn right on 5th.

6. The Jersey Shore kids
Yo man, you gotta turn right there ahhhhh look at that chick! Damn! Aw dude, dude, there's the tanning place! GTL MAN LET'S GO.

5. Kanye West
Yo driver, I’m gonna let you finish, but turning right last exit was the BEST. IDEA. EVER.

4. Lady Gaga
Turn ra ra right right right, in point oh six miles, gaga ooh la la, there’s your des-tin-ation!

3. Lil’ Jon
RIGHT. YEAH. OKAYYY. YEAH. OKAYY. RIIIGHT. YEAHH. OKAYY. SHOTS!

2. Isiah Mustafa (The Old Spice Guy)
Look at your car. Now look at me. Now look at the road. You are now turning left to that thing you want to go to. Now look at me. Now look at your man. Why are you looking at me? You’re on a horse.

1. Christian Bale
YOU NEED TO TURN RIGHT. DO I COME IN YOUR CAR AND TELL YOU TO TURN LEFT? I FUCKING DON-SHUT THE FUCK UP, BRUCE. AH DA DA DA DA LIKE THIS WITH YOUR TURN SIGNAL. WHAT DON’T YOU FUCKING UNDERSTAND? TURN RIGHT. WE ARE FUCKING DONE PROFESSIONALLY.

PS I didn't make that picture; the internet created it from its glorious hands. AKA, I googled it.

Bad Joke Post #1

noreply@blogger.com (mizliz) — Thu, 08 Jul 2010 22:09:00 +0000

On my local news, I saw a story about a woman who collects dice. She has thousands of them and they cover her whole house. It's kinda weird, no? But we should leave her alone.

Maybe that's just how she rolls.

http://instantrimshot.com/

Titanic in 3D: Sink this Lameness

noreply@blogger.com (mizliz) — Tue, 06 Jul 2010 20:21:00 +0000

That's enough, James Cameron.

Earlier this year, James Cameron mentioned that they were targeting a spring 2012 release for the 3D version of Titanic...the director, who's converting the blockbuster into 3-D for re-release in April 2012, the 100th anniversary of the ship's sinking.

Source

Okay, Hollywood. You listen to me. Titanic is a classic. It's three hours of awesomeness and I cry at the end every. single. time.

But we do not need Kate Winslet's boobs or that jackass iceberg in 3D.
The Titanic does not need to sail into my face for me to love this movie, and I think that's how everyone else feels too. You know, except James Cameron. He needs a new comforter stuffed with hundred dollar bills.

And it's even more insulting that it's coming out on the hundredth anniversary of the ship sinking. I'm positive that all the people who died are going to be joyful that someone is making their deaths...IN THREE DIMENSIONS.

It's just a little much, that's all. And it's annoying.
And unless James Cameron sends me some of his money toilet paper, I'm gonna be pissed about it.

P.S. Yes that is an inflatable Titanic slide in the picture. Yes, I want it.

Let me go "Home"

noreply@blogger.com (mizliz) — Sat, 03 Jul 2010 21:21:00 +0000

Slow news day. Hell, slow news MONTH, as you can see by my lack of posting.
All you need to know is that the World Cup is taking over everything and vuvuzelas are the new BZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ. Oh, and Paris Hilton blew her way out of another arrest.

I'm out of things to talk about, so let's talk about music.

"Home" by Edward Sharpe and Magnetic Zeros

I heard this song driving in my friend's car. She has mix CDs and has no idea where the songs come from. I heard it, wrote lyrics on a napkin, and googled it the minute I got home. I fell fully in love with it the minute I heard it. It's been on repeat on my mp3 player for weeks. It's in my top 100 songs, so you're gonna hear it.

It's a folksy, upbeat, fantastic song. I can't count all the instruments in this -- I can hear piano, guitar, some flute thing, potentially a banjo. But mostly, when I hear it, I go somewhere warm and country. And that's a great thing, when a song takes you somewhere.

The female voice is what truly got me. I did some research, and found that it's Jade Castrinos. She sounds like Jenny Lewis met Neko Case and hit up Rachel Yamagata for some raspy vocals. As in, I love her voice more than words can tell. Unfortunately, she hasn't done anything but this. A shame.

More than that, I'm a total sap and love songs about love. And this isn't "oh, I love you, you're perfect, let's spend our life together with no problems or fighting and with unicorns and rainbows." This is realistic. And many people have felt it. That home is wherever another person is.

The bad: Apparently it was on Degrassi? Get out of here with that nonsense. I hate when great songs end up on crappy shows. Don't get me started on the fact that folksy indie music ends up on Grey's Anatomy way too much for my liking.

If you liked this, find Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic Zeros on iTunes or find tour dates, links, and all kinds of stuff at http://www.edwardsharpeandthemagneticzeros.com/

I bet he challenged her to a Throwdown

noreply@blogger.com (mizliz) — Sat, 12 Jun 2010 00:53:00 +0000

So January Jones (Betty Draper on Mad Men) might be my favorite classy trainwreck in the history of celebrities. Yes, I said classy trainwreck. She’s been out cavorting with Jeremy Piven (whom I adore, I approve) and Adrian Brody. She was recently seen doing the most fashionable Walk of Shame I’ve seen in years. And she still looks good doing all of it.

This time, however, her controversy is hilariously awful. Emphasis on hilarious.
Jones crashed her car into THREE other parked cars, and proceeded to call Bobby Flay to save the day. Yes, Bobby Flay. Yes, “wait, what?” is a legitimate response here.

As we first reported Jones was driving home last night when her car struck 3 parked vehicles. She left her license with a witness, walked a short distance to her home, called 911 and eventually returned to the scene…around 10 minutes after the crash, Food Network star Bobby Flay showed up in a separate car, began talking with her and telling her to leave the scene, which she did.

Via TMZ

So basically she left the scene, went home, changed clothes, and came back. They couldn’t test her sobriety because she might have had a drink at home, the LAPD said. Remind me to try that sometime.

I’m a fan of Bobby Flay and his ginormous ego. But is he a womanizer? Probably. At last count he’s on his third wife. (Sayeth Wikipedia) And the first thing I could think was that January’s hitting that fine piece of meat. Oh, but there’s an explanation that doesn’t involve adultery. Isn’t there always?

We spoke with Flay, who tells us he was watching the basketball game last night at The London West Hollywood Hotel with a group of people that included Jones… Flay says he had only met Jones once before, and last night she asked for his number because she wanted to redo her kitchen and give his number to her designer.

Via TMZ, bolding mine.

WHAT. Again, I’m going to use that sometime. Oh, can I have your number? I want to redecorate my kitchen. Or my bedroom. With you in it.

Needless to say, she didn’t get arrested and nothing of worth happened besides the entirety of the internet cracking the hell up. Normally I don't care about celebrity drama, but this was just too hysterical not to talk about.

Don't Call My Name, Alejandro

noreply@blogger.com (mizliz) — Tue, 08 Jun 2010 22:10:00 +0000

Or, Go Get A Haircut, Fernando: My "Alejandro" Video Review

When I first heard Lady Gaga’s great anthem of denying herself sexy Spaniards, I expected a video that was “hot like Mexico, rejoice!” I wanted sweaty men in sunshine looking gloriously beautiful. But Lady Gaga is never one to give you what you expect, and the video for “Alejandro” doesn’t make any sense whatsoever. A nearly nine minute epic collaboration with photographer Steven Klein, the video was hyped up and pushed back almost as much as an Apple product. And now it’s here, and boy am I joyfully baffled.

Lady Gaga seems to have trapped herself in a more fabulous version of Nazi Germany, complete with awkward bowl cuts and no Latinos whatsoever.

It’s snowing, there’s a funeral, and I’m still really confused. It’s a visual feast, but maybe it went over my head. I don’t understand the storyline like I did with “Telephone.” I don’t understand the social commentary. But I thoroughly enjoy watching it, and here’s what I got from the video: some things were good, some things were bad, and some were hilarious.

The Good

Hot like Mexico, alright.

•The choreography, as usual, is amazing. Gaga knows how to coordinate her insanity, I’ll give her that. The dance to the “Alejandro” chorus is just phenomenal and I am guilty of rewinding and watching it over and over again. The opening backlit march of the naked militia was great as well.
•Gagaloo’s style is flawless. Every outfit she wears in the video is amazing. I, myself, am partial to her crazy steampunk headset in the first five minutes of the video. She’s one of the very few people that look amazing even when wearing a nude lingerie setup.
•The blasphemy. It’s a known fact that the best way to get people to talk about your video is by pissing them off. Not only does Gaga rock a nun outfit, but she swallows a rosary. And then there’s a crazy cult outfit with a stick-on cross over the vajayjay. Throw in some definite Nazi Germany references and you have a well-planned controversy on your hands.
•Lots of sex is a good way to get views, too. Woah, Gaga. I don’t think this celibacy thing is going very well. Because you definitely just dry-consummated with that awkwardly gyrating dancer. And then you had an orgy with all of them at the end. I don’t know whether to be jealous or happy I’m not in the middle of that cabinet full of bowls.

The Bad

So did ALL you guys lose the bet with that lawn mower?

•Those haircuts. Gaga, I know it’s a fashion statement, but so is having them all butt naked or beautifully tanned or with long hair or…okay, anything but those bowl cuts.
•That pansuit. Girl, you are not Madonna and aren’t forty, get that thing off.
•The ending. She burns up into something that kind of resembles the Slender Man masks from the Marble Hornets videos. I’m going to have nightmares for the rest of my life.
•Alejandro, or the guy we get lots of sad, hopeless shots of so we’ll assume he’s the one and only Ale-Ale-jandro, is as white as I am. We couldn’t get a sexy Mexican for this part? Not at all? No Antonio Banderas or Gael Garcia Bernal or anyone remotely not suburbian? Come on now.

The Hilarious

Cue Mario theme.

I can’t take anything seriously, so it’s no surprise that I was cracking up during some parts of this serious video.
•The fabulous military march that went along with the atrocious pantsuit. Are you kidding me? I about fell off my chair when these guys came out of the darkness with their model walk. You work that military regalia, boy. Own that jacket.
•Gaga, not to be a bother, but it seems that you have guns growing out of your boobs. You might want to get that checked out.
•The spike hat. It's the darker cousin of the blue shell that always pisses me off in Mario Kart. That and he looks like a sad land mine.

Tweet sized review: Confusing and beautiful, like a narwhal. With a bowl cut.

Watch the video and think for yourself.

About The Blog, The Lady, and The Info

noreply@blogger.com (mizliz) — Tue, 23 Mar 2010 05:03:00 +0000

OVERLY FABULOUS-STILL KIND OF UNDER CONSTRUCTION

THE BASICS
There will be television rants, music reviews, and random stuff I find on the internet here. However, I will try my very best to make it entertaining.

MISSION
To spread awesomeness across the land. And to pimp out my writing, I'm not a liar.

ULTERIOR MOTIVE
Hire me? Please? Look how entertaining I am. I'm like a monkey, only with boobs.

GEE, ISN’T THAT SELLING OUT, LIZ?
Probably. But I needed something other than clips as writing samples and I like to talk about myself.

MYSELF
I’m Lizabeth Richardson, fabulous writer extraordinaire. You may call me Liz, you may call me mizliz, just don’t call me before 9 AM.
Who has two thumbs, writing skill, hipster funk, crisis management, a love of all things entertaining, and a terribly overused Office reference? This girl.
You will hear more about me via posts, but here’s a crash course:

AGE: 19
OCCUPATION: By day, college student and features editor for the Moraine Valley Glacier. By night, internet superhero
RESIDENCE: Obnoxious house in Chicago Ridge, IL
TRUE LOVE: Writing
TRUE ENEMY: MAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAATH! *shakes fist*
TRUE CALLING: Sleeping
FAVORITE COLOR: Rainbow
FAVORITE FOOD: Whatever’s in front of me at the moment
FAVORITE WORD: extraordinaire.
DON’T: underestimate my genius
DO: call me sweetcheeks, honeybuns.

This is still under construction, so expect more information in a better planned out fashion.