His and Hers Depression Blog

Dreary Weather....Again

2009-10-29T20:31:00Z

We're having another dreary day here in Southwest Missouri.  Yesterday was beautiful and it seemed like the whole town was out enjoying the sunshine. Today, once again, we are engulfed in gloomy, rainy weather. The month of October has been the wettest and coolest on record in our area. That's hard on a person's mental health, especially when prone to depression.

Many of my family members have been sick the past few weeks. Hubby and I have had our turns with various bugs too. So far, none of us has gotten the H1N1 virus. Anyway, relationships suffer when it's gloomy and people are sick, because we try to avoid passing the germs around. We've practiced isolationism to the point that we've had 'cabin fever' in October!

Our weatherman is predicting plenty of sunshine the first week of November and we're all looking forward to it.
Happy Halloween!!!

Online Friends

2009-10-21T17:07:00Z

I've made some good online friends over the past several years. I've come to treasure some of these relationships and hope to continue to make new friends online. My online friends are often very instrumental when it comes to chasing away the blues.  I can usually count on them to listen when I need to talk and give a few words of comfort when I need it. I hope I do the same for them.

The state of my mental health (depression) depends a lot on my relationships and how well I am getting along with friends and family. I've found it helps a lot to stay in touch on Facebook enjoying light hearted sharing with each other.  I also interact with the readers of this blog as well as those who make comments on my Avon review blog.

Sometimes I discover really interesting or talented people while socializing online. One recent discovery is the artistry of Declan Kirwan, a fellow Facebook member.   He has pictures of his work posted on his pages and I ordered some of his hand crafted Christmas cards. I received them this week and am amazed at how pretty they are.....three dimensional too!   I will be proud to mail my cards this holiday season. If anyone is interested in having a look you can find me or Declan online at Facebook.

I invite you to interact with me on either of my blogs or at Facebook. Online friends often turn out to be a real blessing!

Free Happier Tests!

2009-10-15T14:51:00Z

I recently came across a new website with a different twist on depression. It's called Happier. Instead of focusing on the things that make us depressed and trying to overcome those negative feelings, this site focuses on doing things that make you happier.

The happier.com website launched on September 23, 2009 and is designed to help people not just be happier but “do happier.” This innovative website provides online tools and exercises for users to make an immediate positive impact on their lives. The website allows users to participate by taking 4 free validated tests with instant feedback on strengths, optimism, happiness and positivity. More than 100 exclusive videos from the world’s leading happiness researchers and practitioners are also included in this section of the site.

Premium users can subscribe for just $5 a month for access to more than a dozen research-backed tools customized to increase happiness, resilience, optimism, engagement, and meaning. The founders worked closely with positive psychology experts, including Martin E.P. Seligman, an exclusive consultant who is the “father of positive psychology” and a noted professor from the University of Pennsylvania. Dr. Seligman is the best-known author, teacher and researcher in the field of positive psychology. His work spans 30 years, 200 articles, and books in over 20 languages.

Happier is something most of us would love to be so I would suggest having a look at this new website. I sure liked what I saw!

Deadly Downpour

2009-10-10T15:50:00Z

Southwest Missouri had a deluge of rain for two days this week. It proved to be a deadly downpour for three of our high school students. They were driving home from school in the middle of a terrible downpour, going down a hill. Their car hydroplaned, sliding sideways into oncoming traffic. All three teens were pronounced dead on the scene. Our community is mourning their loss. An article detailing the accident can be found on KY3's news website.

I've no idea how the families of these children will ever face another stormy day. I am blessed that my four adult children are healthy and have good relationships with me. My heart goes out to the families of these children who were taken so quickly that terrible, rainy afternoon.

One More Flu Shot

2009-09-21T01:19:00Z

Yesterday my husband and I made our way to Walgreen's to get our seasonal flu shot. We had to wait a while and fill out the necessary paperwork, but eventually both of us received our shots and a band aid and were on our way. Now we have one more flu shot to go and we'll be dreading when the h1n1 vaccination becomes available in our area.

I usually don't have much problem with the seasonal flu shot.....maybe a bit of soreness in my arm but once in a while I react with symptoms that resemble a mild case of the flu. That was the case today. I felt a bit of depression about not feeling well but I expect to be my old self again tomorrow.....at least I'd better be!

My husband is also feeling under the weather this afternoon so we kicked back and watched an old Tom Hanks movie. Sometimes allowing ourselves to take it easy and pamper ourselves is the best thing we can do to feel better physically as well as mentally. Have you had your seasonal flu shot yet?

Another Year Older

2009-09-15T16:14:00Z

Today I turn another year older. I feel older too but I think it's because of the dreary rainy weather we are having. During this past year I've written about the problems I've had with anger, anxiety and depression, as well as relationships with family and friends. It all turned out okay and I've been doing better the past few weeks. I haven't felt the need to blog about all of my problems.   I hope that's a good sign.

I have been thinking about what I want to do with this blog in the coming year. I'm considering writing it more like a journal....talking about what I've been doing and how I feel about the things I'm doing. Maybe you'll learn more about me and see that I have lots of joy in my life to go along with the depression.

I'll start today by telling you that I've added my Facebook information at the top of the sidebar. I've really been enjoying Facebook lately since my daughter and daughter-in-law have joined.   I've been a member for a long time but didn't spend much time there until recently. Now I am addicted to a game on Facebook called Farmtown. I love seeing what my friends and relatives are saying. I guess you could say I am feeling a lot of happiness as a result of interacting with others on Facebook.

Please don't stop visiting my blog.   I'll try to do a better job of posting....I've done an awful job of it the past few months. If you'd like to be friends on Facebook just send me an invitation. Thanks so much for reading this.

Whispering at Family Gatherings

2009-08-22T19:56:00Z

I often leave family gatherings with a bad feeling after observing two or more family members whispering to each other. I've been thinking about this for several days and even looked up the word whispering in an online dictionary. The verb form means to speak softly, or to speak quietly and privately, as by way of gossip, slander, or intrigue. It also means to say or tell privately or secretly. No wonder I have a bad feeling after seeing this happen in my family.

I personally think private whispered conversations are rude when sitting at a table, or in a room full of family members. I'm not talking about the occasional whispered words between spouses or a parent and child when it's necessary to convey a short message. I'm talking about two people sitting next to each other and speaking quietly to each other for a period of time. Sometimes, I can't help but think it is done intentionally to hurt other people by excluding them. I hope it isn't intentional but only thoughtless.

I have discovered that whispering at family gatherings isn't only bothering me, but other family members as well. I've been contemplating whether or not I can do anything to stop this kind of hurtful behavior when our family gets together. So far, I haven't come up with a solution. I'd love to hear my readers ideas. Thanks for reading and I'll watch for your comments.

Quotations

2009-08-05T23:52:00Z

I really enjoy going to the movies and so do most of the members of my family. We like quoting lines from movies, sometimes attempting to use the same voice as the character in the movie.   My brother, David is especially good at sounding like and acting like John Wayne. Several family members attempt to imitate Billy Bob Thornton in "Slingblade" when he is talking about french fries.    One of my favorite quotes from a movie is by Forrest Gump when he returns home to his mother.   My sons often say, "Mama,I'm home now" and it always brings a smile to my face when I hear it.

We name the rooms in our house.......and it's not a big house either. When my youngest son moved out, I decided to name his old room "the box" after "the box" in "Cool Hand Luke" one of our all time favorite movies.  If you come to visit you get to "spend the night in the box" just like Paul Newman had to do so many times.

Enjoying movies and having fun with quotations, as well as imitations, is one way our family has fun.   We all know that having a bit of fun is great for our overall mental health.   Having a good laugh really helps with depression.

The other day I came across some really good quotations by famous people.   These are more serious than most of the ones from the theater.  Most of these make you think for a while and many of them offer up great advice.   These bits of wisdom were made by great world leaders. I hope you will enjoy pondering some of the quotations in The Great Quotes Movie.

A Day Without Tears

2009-07-22T23:50:00Z

I don't cry often and have often wondered why. I frequently have depression and feel badly about myself or the way my day is going, but I seldom cry. Others who have depression or bipolar disorder cry on a daily basis. I wonder why there are so many differences in depressed people's behavior.

Most of us with depression feel sad and many of us feel unmotivated. Many of us sleep too much and some of us can't sleep. Some of us over eat and a few of us lose our appetites. Many of us eat all of the time, or binge eat, or have cravings for things like chocolate. Mental health problems can easily lead to having problems with our physical health.

Relationships often suffer when one or more persons has depression or bipolar disorder. It takes a great deal of tolerance and understanding to keep your relationship with your significant other on an even keel, while battling depression. It also requires a lot of love and communication.

Recently, someone told me they cry once, every day. My heart went out to them but I wasn't sure how to respond. Since then, I've wondered if a good cry every day would help to release some of the bad feelings and allow one to go on about the job of living and loving. However, I think it would be very hard on a person to cry every day and it makes me sad to think of that happening to someone I care about.

Today I'd like to wish all of us who have problems with depression, a day without tears.

It Runs in the Family

2009-07-12T17:45:00Z

We often think of physical attributes when we say "It runs in the family".   We might be talking about blue eyes, curly hair, big feet or small hands.   All of my siblings have curly hair so it's safe to say the trait runs in the family.   However, all of my siblings also have some kind of mental health problem.

I have five sisters and one brother.   You may have read some of my brother's writing on this blog and you have probably seen his picture on the blog too. He suffers from bipolar disorder.   I'm not sure if any of my sisters are bipolar because I haven't been in contact with most of them for some time. I do know that all of them have varying degrees of depression and some have problems with social anxiety.   My parents suffered from depression and some of my children struggle with depression.

A loved one sent me the link to a good article from cnnhealth.com titled, "Are you at risk for depression? A quick family history could tell". The article states that family history is a good predictor of who is likely to have mental health issues. The more relatives who have problems, the more likely the patient will also have problems.    I think it's important to give our doctors a thorough history of those members of our family who have struggled with mental health issues.   In the long run, it will help us to better deal with our problems and thus set a good example for those around us.