Mike's musings

2008-08-08T20:26:00.002+01:00

Expenses

My company doesn't always pay its expenses as close to on time as I'd like. I'm currently waiting for around 1500 quid, and am about to put in another claim for over 700. This doesn't always make balancing the books at home very easy, as you may appreciate.

Jo's taken to talking to Buster - it might be first thing in the morning, after prayers at night, or just in the car. She'll look up into the sky, and just talk to him. It's really sweet, and very healthy, I think.

2008-08-07T20:48:00.002+01:00

Vegas?

Looks like I'm off to Vegas for some training. Security and Linux, that's sort of thing. Then I'll head off to Mississauga for a few days, combining the two trips. 10-11 days away, but sometimes that's how it works, and I _have_ cleared it with Moo.

My parents popped round this evening for supper - they're off from Stansted tomorrow morning - and I barbecued. Rain doesn't even begin to start to cover it. Torrents. Thunder. Lightning. Full wet-weather gear.

2008-08-06T20:39:00.003+01:00

Supervision

My first supervision with training incumbent: John. All went well, and we're settling down nicely, I think. We're going to do some work on funerals over the next couple of months, as it's one of the first CME (Continuing Ministerial Education) topics I'll be tackling. It's an area which is difficult for SSMs and NSMs (both part-time ministers), as most funerals take place during the week, when we're working, so it's important to see if we can find some opportunities to work on this.

Now, why can't I get ssh to work properly with public keys under CentOS? Hmmm.

2008-08-05T20:15:00.002+01:00

A bit lonely

The girls were out with Mel today, and Moo was working away: I got rather lonely. I'm used to popping downstairs from time to time for a cup of tea, or for lunch, or just because there's a bark as Buster wants to go out. But it was just me in the house today.

Let's hope we can get a kitten or two soon.

2008-08-04T21:44:00.002+01:00

Still not here

Buster's still not here, and it's the little things, but we're fine. I'm really fine, I think, but sad from time to time - writing yesterday's blog entry was hard: harder than I expected.

Working hard, and no dog to take for a walk at lunchtime.

2008-08-03T21:46:00.002+01:00

SecondLife and preaching

(backposting) Oh - I completely forget to post about the fact that Mark, a friend and member of the ministry team in Secondlife, had asked me to take the 1200 SLT (2000 BST) service in SecondLife. It's only the second service I'd taken in-world, and I was touched that James, the other Halstead curate, turned up. I preached on the importance of the Sabbath - even if we don't take a legalistic view of every Sunday - and how we owe it to ourselves, our families, our work, and our God to take some rest and time out for ourselves. God did, after creating the Universe, and if _He_ can, so can we. And so should we.

I'd hoped to chat to people afterwards, but had serious problems afterwards. God gave me enough to take the service, and then made it clear that I had to follow the advice I'd just preached. So we went to bed.

2008-08-03T21:09:00.004+01:00

Buster's dead

(backposting) We were up at 0200: Buster was barking, and not well. Panting, drooling so much. I ended up calling the emergency vet number. I spoke to a very nice female vet, who was very reassuring, and we agreed that Buster clearly had a temperature. She said that other than giving him painkillers, she wouldn't be able to give him much more than the medication we already had, given the symptoms that I'd described. She encouraged me to give him his medication a little early, and to try to get him to have some food as well. I got the medication down him, but not the food. And though I went upstairs, I was down again a few minutes later, as he was clearly very upset. I let him outside, as it was cooler out there. We went to bed.

I was up at 0630 to deacon at the 0800 communion service. After getting dressed and some food, I went outside. I called Buster, and he padded down the drive, though he didn't look well. He had knocked over his water bowl, so I filled it up, and he came to drink from it, but then collapsed. I went and got Moo, and we put the water in front of him, but he really couldn't drink from it. I phoned the emergency vet again, and as I was on the phone, he tried to get up again, and failed. They said to bring him in to the surgery in Witham - about 30 minutes away.

I brought Moo's car down, we put some towels in it, and I had to manhandle poor Buster into the boot, because he couldn't give me any help at all.

I drove there faster than I should have done, in places, though I think I drove safely. And I chatted to Buster from time to time, through some tears. When I got there, I rang the bell, and the receptionist/assistant came out. But when we opened the boot, I was unsurprised to find that Buster was dead. The vet came, and confirmed it.

They'd had a terrible night. Buster was not the first dog to turn up dead. They'd had to put another one down, and other things had gone badly. I felt for them very much. They were great, though, and I don't think that there would have been anything they could have done if I'd turned up earlier. Nor do I blame our vets - I think that, given the symptoms, all was done that could be done. Sometimes, animals die. Particularly Newfoundlands, I'm afraid.

Moo hadn't expected that he'd be dead when I came back and told her, and Jo didn't quite get it, though she's been saying on and off that she's sad. Her first reaction was to try to cheer us up - I cried when I told her. And Miri's been waving at the French windows from time to time, as if she was looking for him.

Oh, I'd told John, my training incumbent, that I'd not make the 0800, and he was very understanding. I made the 1000, and it was marvellous! I performed the deacon's role, including reading the Gospel, preparing the altar and the elements, inviting people to the Peace, and the dismissal. As I walked up the the nave with New Testament, I realised that I had a new home, and it was very emotional.

We went out to lunch - we felt we deserved it - and then went to RSPA Danaher, where we got Buster. We told them about him, and then went to look at kittens. We could pretend that it was for the girls, but that would be a lie.

And in the late afternoon, Si and D came around with Morgs and Boo and their kids. And their dogs. We had a good barbecue, and it was good to have dogs around.

I really loved Buster. But I find it easier to accept his death than I thought. Partly because we've been through it before with Suzy. Partly because I have not the slightest doubt that Buster and Suzy are both in heaven. With Meg. And, as Jo said tonight, when we were saying prayers, let's pray that Meg and Buster are playing together.

2008-08-02T20:50:00.000+01:00

Kim's wedding!

(backposting) In the morning, we got up and went to Freeport. The official reasons where:

to get a wedding card for Kim and and Andy and
to get my watch fixed.

It was mainly to get out of the house, actually. We got back in time for lunch and then to go to Kim's wedding to Andy. Miriam's not been very well - running a nasty temperature - but she's just got non-specific toddleritis. The wedding went well (they both said "I will"!), although I had to take Jo out twice to go to the loo.

When we headed out to the meal, Miri still wasn't great, but managed OK - keep them dosed up with the relevant medication. Kim and Andy had asked me to say a grace at the beginning of the meal, which was a real honour. It was also my first outing in a public forum in the clerical shirt and tie. I wore a black shirt and a linen suit - having tried on a grey shirt and two other suits.

We had a good time at the meal, sitting on a table with Gena and a bunch of Kim's previous colleagues. Jo enjoyed playing with April, a girl she knows from pre-school and elsewhere, and who was a bridesmaid. Jo was, however, a little bit put out that she (Jo) didn't get a present from the bride and groom, whereas April did...

At the disco afterwards, they were taking requests, and, aware of the shirt and collar, I requested (and got) "Spirit in the Sky". Top tune.

Buster seemed a bit better this morning, having had some food, and so I didn't take him to the vet. I managed to get his pills down him to in the morning and before we went out to the post-wedding party (wedding breakfast). When we got back, though, he was very drooly, and panty, and I was quite worried about him. But he went to bed OK, though he'd not wanted to come in from the garden after going out.

2008-08-01T20:45:00.002+01:00

Girls back home

(backposting) The girls got back this evening, and we got them both back to sleep fairly quickly, which was good. I was a little worried about Buster today, as he's only eaten 1 out of the past 5 meals, and has been dry coughing a little bit. So, I took him to the vet. The one I saw knew Suzy (who died from a heart complaint), and was very understanding about the fact that I'd brought him in. His eyes were a little gummy, and it turns out that he has a bit of a temperature, but at least his heart sounded OK. She said to bring him back tomorrow morning if he didn't seem better tomorrow.

2008-07-31T17:58:00.003+01:00

Having children ...

... tends - in our case, at least - to prevent one from over-indulging _too_ much of an evening, as you know you're likely to be up far too early in the morning, and, what's more, that you'll have to deal with them when they get up. Well, we all got up before 0700, as Ruth and James had to get away, but at least there were no loud children around.

Later on in the day, James very kindly walked me through the deacon's role at Holy Communion in Halstead, which is different to what I've done before. He's quite high church, and takes these things pretty seriously, so was a good teacher.

Forgot to post on yesterday's blog that both Ruth and James are planning to try out SecondLife. James has already popped in and has an av: Ruth not yet.

2008-07-30T17:55:00.002+01:00

Friends over

(backposting) Tonight, James (the other curate at Halstead) and Ruth (his wife) came over for a barbecue. We'd already established that they'd stay over, so that everyone could have a drink or two. I did the food, they brought the booze. And we did have a drink. Or two. We had a very companionable evening, and ended up playing on the Wii (they're now thinking of getting one, and convincing Ruth's dad to get one as well), chatting and (in my case) playing and singing Finzi songs on the piano. Till far too late. But we had a lovely time, and it was good to have a break from work, which is pretty much all I've been doing this week, as the girls have been away.

2008-07-29T18:30:00.001+01:00

Misc

Busy day, had a haircut, missing the girls. Oh, and I discovered that one of the bishops who attended our Lambeth conference gig has signed up for SecondLife. Go him!

2008-07-28T21:08:00.002+01:00

Spiritual direction

I went to see my spiritual director today, and it was really good to have the time and opportunity to spend time talking through and thinking about what's been going on since the ordination. So, so many things. Much to reflect on.

Oh, and God's grace moved today. I can't really talk about it, but He answered a major prayer, so wow.

2008-07-27T22:41:00.003+01:00

Many things

First, did anyone notice how I managed to avoid the obvious "primates" gag yesterday, which would have revolved around the trips to the zoo and the Lambeth conference? I was quite proud of myself.

What else? Jo, Miri and Moo headed off to Kate and Mac's around 1330, and arrived around 1600. Dad and I had a good meal at the White Hart this evening. We'd taken Jo and Miri to the 1000 at St Andrew's, Halstead, and they did very well.

And after I'd failed miserably to record Top Gear this evening (not only the wrong times, but also the wrong channel...), I watched it on iPlayer. Very, very funny.

2008-07-26T17:23:00.000+01:00

The zoo (and Lambeth)

(backposting) This morning, we went to one of our favourite places for the girls: Colchester Zoo. Dad came along as well, and we all had a good time. Miri's now at an age where she can start to enjoy the animals, and she seemed particularly interested in the sea lions and piglets.

In the afternoon, Dad and I drove down to the Lambeth Conference, taking place at the University of Kent's Canterbury campus. I managed to get online, and a good connection to SL, and then we headed off to get some supper. Gareth (also on the SL ministry team) and I passed over 50 flyers around different bishops at their supper tables: I've never seen so much episcopal purple in one place. Lots of senior people, including, I noticed, the bishop of Sudan, who's in the news at the moment.

Here's a couple of paragraphs I wrote today to be read out at one of the SecondLife Anglican Cathedral services today:

Last night, members of the ministry team had the opportunity to speak to attendees at the Lambeth Conference. Numbers were small - as for many of the fringe events - but discussion was committed and deeply thoughtful. I can report that the Anglican Church is taking us very seriously, as well as the opportunities for mission in other online media. We need to think hard about what kind of church we want to be, with what responsibilities and duties, but the Church is listening, and will continue to listen. The attendees were unanimous in their opinion that our mission is both truly Christian and vital to the Church's future.

We have lots of work to do: but it's God's work, and he will give us strength and guidance! Hallelujah!

I still need to do lots of thinking about what's come out of this, but it's very positive. Thanks be to God!

2008-07-25T16:12:00.002+01:00

Back home, and nervous

(backposting) Yes, getting a little nervous about tomorrow night: the presentation I'm giving tomorrow night at the Lambeth Conference. Got back home mid-morning, and Moo came back from seeing Victoria with the girls around lunchtime. In the afternoon, we popped to Sudbury to pick up my watch (strap still not fixed, after two weeks) and get a replacement part for the strimmer (no stockists in town).

My dad arrived before the girls went to bed, and, having offered to read Jo a story after her bath, promptly fell asleep in front of the television. Luckily, Jo thought it was hilarious. Dad's come over to share the driving to Lambeth, as he was worried that I'll be too jetlagged tomorrow, and I accepted his kind offer.

2008-07-24T21:35:00.003+01:00

Back home

Well, it's been a very, very good visit to Mississauga, and I've got lots done. I've also had an opportunity to establish myself as someone with a bunch of different useful skills, and they're being used. In fact, that's the only real problem: I've got a list of 20 different tasks that I'm signed up for which aren't actually part of my core job. Having said that, my job description has changed somewhat as of this week (with my approval!), so that's partly dealt with.

I'm really looking forward to seeing Moo, Jo and Miri tomorrow: sadly they're away next week, but we'll manage somehow.

Anyway: a good week away.

2008-07-23T01:12:00.000+01:00

Despair

Not mine. But someone who's very strong, usually, showed me a moment of possible despair. They didn't want anything more than a confirmation that things can get better, but I was immensely flattered that they felt they could drop their guard in front of me, just for a few seconds.

I don't know if they would have done the same if I didn't have "The Rev." as a title, and that's interesting, but I think it's the Christian commitment - and, hopefully, integrity - that was the more important factor.

2008-07-22T15:48:00.004+01:00

Miri and the phone

(backposting) Miri loves phones. She'll pick them up, talk to them, hand them to you, take them back, talk some more, all of that. But when there's actually someone there, she seems entirely freaked by the whole business, and will just look at it in a slightly bemused fashion.

Today, she talked back. She seemed to realise it was me, and even responded to "kiss, kiss" (and a kissing noise from my end) by kissing the phone. In fact, she pretty much slobbered all over it, and Moo had to clean it afterwards, but it was really sweet. I remember when Jo suddenly seemed to get it, and it makes phoning home so much more rewarding.

A really busy day in Mississauga (my company's HQ) today, which is excellent, but tiring. I popped to a Mall in the evening, bought some books and some clothes (so cheap over here), some of which are presents for Moo and the girls. On the way back, witnessed an amazing thunderstorm in the distance, with ragged lightning across the sky: God works in truly fantastic ways.

2008-07-21T23:27:00.002+01:00

Yawn

In Canada, about to go out for supper with my boss, which means that I can't just flob tonight. But should be OK. Good flight, got lost on the way to the office, drove on the wrong side of the road briefly. Nothing much to report, then...

2008-07-20T21:19:00.002+01:00

I spy, with my little eye...

... something beginning with "buh" (me).: Bong? (Jo); (Whoops...)
... something beginning with "cuh" (Moo): Kraftwerk? (Jo); (In fact, we suspect she said "craftwork", but we were both seriously impressed with our daughter's nascent musical interests.)

2008-07-19T19:33:00.003+01:00

A miscellaneous day

Sennen came over for the morning, and he went with Jo to ballet and tap, though he sat most of it out, in the end. Trip to the park with him, Grenville (his Dad, who turned up for lunch - including strawberries!), Jo and Miri. Quite a lazy day, to the extent that you can be lazy with two 3 year olds and a 1 year old. Miri said "bread" and "lady" for the first times today. And I've got started on a presentation on Web 2.0 and SecondLife for the Lambeth Conference. And I've got a SecondLife meeting about it with the ministry team of the Anglican Cathedral there.

2008-07-18T21:32:00.003+01:00

Busy, busy

I'm off to Canada on Monday, and I had a lot of work to get done before the end of today. And I managed it.

2008-07-17T21:10:00.003+01:00

Paris!

(backposting) Jo was up at 0345, and I didn't get back to sleep before 0430, when I got up to drive to Gosfield for a cooked breakfast with Geoff, after which we picked up John and drove to Ebbsfleet International. There we met Viv, James, Ruth (his wife), Clifford and Anne (his wife). We got to Paris, and did the OpenTour bus ride around the city. We ate and drank (twice, with less drinking the second time), and got to know each other better than we had before. I spent lots of time talking to people, particularly Ruth and Geoff, and on the way back in the car, Geoff, John and I had some very interesting discussions on some major theological and pastoral issues, including:

reception of the Eucharist by children;
baptism policies;
marriage policies;
marriage preparation.

I had a very interesting time, but the highlights of the day for me were trips to Notre Dame de Paris and the Memorial de la Déportation. I rather dragooned people into going to this, as none of them had been there before. People don't seem to know it: for me, it's a must-see when visiting Paris. It's very affecting, and I cried, as I think I have on each occasion I've been there. Notre Dame, which we did immediately afterwards, was hardly less emotional for me. Although it was very busy, there's an oasis of calm in the middle, and I also joined a little service in the Lady Chapel at the East end. I've never said the Ave Maria that many times before, even if it was in French. Does that count?

Slept a little on the train back, and got home around 0020.

2008-07-16T20:34:00.003+01:00

Toyboys - or Tomboys?

I went to my first deanery chapter meeting today. I should probably explain. The deanery chapter is where all the priests and the deacons from the deanery get together to chat, discuss issues, and generally bring up whatever they want. There are 13 clergy in our deanery (Hinckford), though only 6 of us made it. We went to a pub (The Lion) in Earls Colne, and ate outside. I met Margaret and Janet, who'd I'd not met before, and although we spent some important time discussing some pastoral issues - personal and parish - it was the downtime together that was just as important.

Lots of laughter and joking, teasing and fun. There was the discussion about whether Viv would like a tomboy. I meant toyboy - but it was particularly funny in light of the earlier chat about homosexuality in the Church of England.

It was a good, light-hearted lunch - I don't know how it would have been with more people (and different people) - and I must make sure I make it to these meetings as often as possible.

Miri's at the "no!" stage, but it's mainly aimed at the dog. Oh, and "shh!", with her index finger right up the side of her nose: again, mainly to the dog.

She's a lovely thing, and I wish she'd not taken about an hour and a half to go to sleep when she came into my bed in the middle of last night.

But Moo's home today.