PassiveAggressiveNotes.com

waiting for the rapture (and/or a thank you note)

kerry — Fri, 06 Nov 2009 00:59:00 +0000

writes ben in snohomish, washington: “we visit my aunt the same amount we visit the rest of our extended family, but for some reason she takes it personally that we don’t do so daily. she took the occasion of my son’s 11th birthday to take a shot at us.”

the art of passive resistance

kerry — Thu, 05 Nov 2009 01:53:41 +0000

travis in edmonton says this painting (which “resembled a tenth-grader’s crack at designing fantasy novel jacket”) appeared one day in the alley behind the pub where he works. feeling puckish, travis says, “every evening i would turn it toward the south-facing balconies…and every morning it would be face-down in the street again, until eventually it disappeared for good.”

granny doesn’t mess around

kerry — Wed, 04 Nov 2009 04:15:31 +0000

while some old folks (and grandmothers in particular) are seasoned masters of the heart-tugging passive-aggressive guilt trip, there’s another breed of blue-hairs who’ve seemingly given up on all the social niceties and instead just give their unfiltered opinion on any subject at hand. their all-purpose excuse, as demonstrated by this example from tacoma, washington: “i’m old!”

yet while this group certainly helps make reading the “letters to the editor” page entertaining, charity in westfield, wisconsin says the “grumpy old crank” routine isn’t quite as amusing when you have to live with one of them. “i’ve been staying with my grandmother for two months,” charity says, and “she tells me daily that i stink.” she woke up one morning to find this slightly more polite message….which was not-so-politely attached to toilet seat with packing tape.

related: a day in the life of a crank

thanks for the geography lesson, dad!

kerry — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 03:25:18 +0000

our anonymous submitter from chicago says she and her four siblings recently received this somewhat cryptic e-mail from dear old dad. explains a: “the initials refer to our names (and spouses’ names, where applicable). dad lives in west bloomfield. i’m pretty sure it means he wants us to visit?”

related: love, dad

“piece out our imperfections with your thoughts”

kerry — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 22:47:29 +0000

writes mike in provo, utah: “this is a letter my friend liz found on the windshield of her car during the time she was dating her now-husband. they framed the note, and now have it proudly displayed in their living room.”

related: a substance user and a player!

jerk-o-lanterns

kerry — Fri, 30 Oct 2009 03:50:31 +0000

chris in valdosta, georgia came home last halloween eve to find this friendly reminder taped to every mailbox in his quiet little cul-de-sac. (”it’s a little worse for wear,” chris explains, “because i ripped it off and stomped it on a few times before scanning it.”)

the underlying message, interestingly enough, actually isn’t all that different from this one, by an unhappy halloween celebrant in somersworth, new hampshire.

meanwhile, jake in grand rapids, michigan came home last halloween to this glowing display in his living room. “apparently my roommate and his girlfriend had spent all day working on them,” jake says. “i don’t think he was mad at me for any one particular thing, but he did this sort of thing on a fairly regular basis…which made living with him pretty entertaining.”

related: pumpkin with a death wish

the half-donut bandit

kerry — Thu, 29 Oct 2009 04:20:58 +0000

as we’ve noted here before, the white-collar nuisance known as the nibbler has been pathetically picking his (half)way through office kitchenettes across the land for some time now.

while the nibbler’s actions are usually met with disdain, one oh-so-compassionate office-worker from omaha decided to take a different approach — an e-mail intervention, of sorts. i’d also be interested to see his advice for mike in cleveland, who seems to have similar delusions about the health impact of eating 9 donuts instead of 10.

(click the image below to enlarge)

the kicker? as it turns out, according to our anonymous submitter,”the bandit was, in fact, a guy!”

aunt myrtle was always ahead of her time

kerry — Wed, 28 Oct 2009 02:52:02 +0000

caitlin was browsing in an antique store in waco, texas when she ran across this gem dated april 4, 1910. so if you’ve ever heard someone blame passive-aggressive birthday badgering on this new-fangled facetweet technology…well, you might want to refer them to vera.

you gotta hand it to HR…

kerry — Tue, 27 Oct 2009 02:11:38 +0000

with morale at many companies coasting towards all-time lows, those peppy human resources specialists keep coming up with new budget-conscious ways to keep us worker bees happily humming along. to wit: “popcorn thursday.” sounds like a total blast, right?

meanwhile, an anonymous post-it writer in denver speaks up for how employees really feel about these “morale boosters.”

…since we’re a community

kerry — Mon, 26 Oct 2009 01:48:54 +0000

chris in providence brings us this show-stopper from the computer science department at brown university. my head is still spinning a little bit.

meanwhile, in lake forest, california…

thanks…i guess?

kerry — Fri, 23 Oct 2009 02:12:55 +0000

writes our anonymous submitter in cleveland: “my roommate mike is usually a generous guy, but he’s very possessive of his coffee, beef jerky, and other certain food indulgences. this note was sort of touching; he didn’t want to share, made that clear, but then decided he probably should — not for me though, but for his waistline. what a sweetheart!”

related: you’re not wrong, walter

feel free to share the happy news

kerry — Thu, 22 Oct 2009 00:48:53 +0000

writes our anonymous submitter: “i know carl to have done exactly what she’s saying — cheat on her and lie to the girls saying he didn’t have a girlfriend. but still, a mass email? really? i’m not even on her friends list…so did she send it to his friends?” (the “k-hole,” by the way, reportedly refers to the apartment in which carl lives.)

raging against the little guy

kerry — Wed, 21 Oct 2009 02:26:48 +0000

kellye from huntsville, alabama spotted these notes posted on boarded-up diner during last month’s G20 summit in pittsburgh.

explains kellye: “the broken windows were caused by a few rowdy anarchists/drunk college kids from oakland who apparently missed the mark in their defiance of the man. since the vandals represented only a very small cross-section of protesters involved, other more local-friendly civil disobedients apparently saw fit to apologize for in their stead and offer their respectful patronage.”

you’re very welcome!

kerry — Tue, 20 Oct 2009 06:07:39 +0000

jonathan, john and michael share a roof deck with their next-door neighbors in san francisco, who jonathan says “repeatedly, and seemingly sincerely, invited us to use their barbecue grill any old time.”

one weekend, jj&m decided to take them up on their offer. they organized a small cook-out for friends and invited the neighbors to join. “they did,” jonathan says, “and a good time was had by all.”

then, the next day, this gracious thank-you note was slipped under their door.

related: blowing smoke