Just so no one could ever accuse me of only putting flattering pictures of myself on the Internet.

1. Woke up this morning feeling (and looking) like a million bucks. Thanks, yoga! This did not carry through 8:13 p.m. (see above). Whatever (see below).

Workin' it in the break room

My GPS might be a slightly off, but my total time for the workout — which, with warm-up and cool down ended up at 7 miles — was only 10 seconds per mile slower than my Mid-Winter Classic 10-miler race pace. I wanted to save face with these guys, running with them for the first time. And I didn’t realize how long the workout was going to be, so I just ran the hard parts hard. Running is so psychological. I’m sure if I set out knowing that I was going to run a 7-mile hill workout, I never could have made myself run that fast.

But it didn’t feel like a rip-my-lungs-out-and-die kind of effort. Which that race did, by the way. Running is so psychological.

3. I’m back down to marathon training weight — 152-ish. I realized how that happened. Tonight, when I came home, I had neither the appetite nor the motivation to do anything more for dinner than a bowl of Cheerios with bananas, strawberries and two scoops of nutritional yeast (see above).

Have I sung the praises of nutritional yeast yet? Don’t be deterred by the gross name. It’s a condiment that’s high in protein and B vitamins. It came up in health blogs I was reading, when I realized that it was the delicious stuff my mom used to buy at the health food store for our cereal when I was growing up. Back then, I think it went by the name brewers yeast.

I read a lot of people describing it as “cheesy” but it doesn’t taste that way to me — more nutty. And buttery, even, though it doesn’t have any fat. If you follow the link, you’ll see its packed with more nutrients than your average

I’m so glad my mom was such a hippie and got us hooked on this stuff as kids.

My cold mid-February weekend was warmed up with many wonderful friends. I had run with them so occasionally this winter and their company was reassuring when I was starting to wonder if I had it in me to do it alone.

The long run yesterday was much too fast, faster than my marathon goal pace, even. I thought I would pay for it today. After the run yesterday was hard, but not as hard as it had been in earlier weeks. I didn’t nap at all, and we stayed out until 11.

Today I felt great. Like, and kinda sad that I wasn’t running. (But rest is just as important!)

Monday is supposed to be cross training on the intermediate schedule. I haven’t been following that so much the past few weeks. Most cross training is walking, or chores, or maybe some light resistance training.

Today I drove to Freeport to start week 6 right with yoga. Terry, the instructor of the class I took in Lewiston last fall, opened her own studio there. It was deep, deep stretching, especially in the hips.

I’ve been doing my yoga at home. Not as much as I should. The benefit of going to a class, and Terry’s classes are so wonderful, is that someone really guides your mind and your practice through the poses. It’s a reminder of how to deal with tightness and stress. After that and a warm bath and a cup of chamomile tea, I feel like a million bucks.

1. The other day, I broke down and went to Subway.  I ordered my usual.

The guy at the counter, Kalvin, mentions he hadn’t seen me in awhile. I said I’ve been brining lunch. Then I said I realized how many calories was in that sandwich.

“Aw, you don’t need to worry about counting calories.”

2. I ordered my bibs for the Sugarloaf Marathon and the Race the Runways half-marathon this week.

Squee! It’s really happening!

I’m also on week 5 — the first week over 30/miles a week.

The runs are getting longer and I’m still a little nervous about running for 2,3,4 hours alone. I hope I don’t have to do it too much. To me, that’s the hardest part. It’s not so much the effort … it’s keeping your mind occupied and feeling connected with the world for these long stretches.

I think this is why I’ve gone back to morning and lunch time runs. If I had to be alone, that’s the time to do it.

3. Most of the people who aren’t my adoring friends and family come to my blog searching for “Couch to 5K before and after pictures.” Which is cool! But I want to reach out of the machine and say to them — it’s not just how you are going to look after you take up running for 12 weeks. I barely looked any different then (maybe 10-12 pounds lost?)

Week 5 on the left, Week 9 on the right

What the Couch to 5K did is it gave me a tool to lose the rest of the weight. Over the next 8 months after I finished C25K, I lost another 30 pounds or so. Half of it by the time I ran my first half-marathon, and the other half training for my first marathon. I wouldn’t have made that real, significant life change if I just ran for 12 weeks, or I never tried to run more after I finished 3 miles.

Which leads me to …

4. I’ve been really in love with running lately. I feel like I’ve had a breakthrough. There have been times in the past year and a half where it was more of a chore than a joy, but this week, it’s been a joy.

My abs & core feel strong and efficient. It doesn’t take as much conscious effort to hold in my form. And every non-running activity I do, my posture feels stronger, better. Easier. It all feels easier.

Mentally I want to doubt this success because I am not running more than I have in the past, and I know my diet leaves much to be improved upon. How can I be getting so much better when it doesn’t feel like I am working harder? It’s because a lot of hard work was put in for the past 18 months and something just -clicked-.

10 a.m. Thank god for coffee and Mucinex.

12 p.m. Dammit, the drugs are wearing off. Am I going to be able to make it through a 6-mile run today?

12:04 p.m.

Grr! I remembered my little water bottles, but not my belt, and my big water bottle, but not the lid.

February 15, 2012 1:04 pm via Twitter for MacReplyRetweetFavorite

@pazzypunk

Pattie Reaves

12:45 p.m. It’s getting late. If I’m going to do this, I better go do it. Also,

SO CONGESTED. :(

February 15, 2012 1:58 pm via Twitter for MacReplyRetweetFavorite

@pazzypunk

Pattie Reaves

1:10 p.m. I could just run on the treadmill inside? That’s supposed to be better than running outside when you’re sick … looks at bag of clothes. Looks at windowless room with an itty bitty TV set. I decide to suffer outside.

1:16 p.m. Clothes on, ready to go. I’m just going to go how I feel. If I feel awful after 10 minutes, I can turn around and come back and just say I went out.

1:22 p.m. AHHHH! my heart rate is over 190?! Checks my pulse with my fingers. Oh, my watch must be broken. I’m more like at 150. I try to slow down a little bit. I am heading down to the Riverwalk, up to the Falls.

1:30 p.m. Running is awesome, and I love life.

The view from the platform by the Great Falls, on the Auburn side. On an otherwise drab and miserable (but warm!) day.

1:45 p.m. Three miles down before I know it. Did I mention I love being outside? My sinuses are so happy. Snot rocket!

2 p.m. Hey, I think I actually will do all 6 miles. I’m flying. It feels so natural and easy. I fucking love these shoes. How did I not have these shoes before now? They are amazing. It’s like a different sport.

2:18 p.m. Not bad for an easy-pace, sick-compromise run.

Finished Run with @runmeter, on a new route, time 1:00:29, 6.06 miles, see http://t.co/AgNwMPhK, average 9:58.

February 15, 2012 3:19 pm via RunmeterReplyRetweetFavorite

@pazzypunk

Pattie Reaves

My friends, I do think I’m getting better.

That's not me. That's Flickr user cosmic_bandita.

I have already sacrificed six seven miles to the altar of speedy recovery. I ran again yesterday morning and it was miserable.

I was just so tired and light-headed. This morning I woke up and didn’t feel really stellar, either, so I slept instead of going out the 6 miles on the schedule.

It’s hard being sick because I want to:

• recover quickly, and
• not make excuses for missing training.

I’m not sure what the right balance is. I’ve heard, “above the neck, go run, below the neck, go rest.” And since this is 100% above the neck today, I will try to make it out, even if its just on the treadmill. But blech!

Weirdest thing. But I’ll take it to mean that I got good cross training in yesterday.

Tony and I celebrated Valentine’s Day early this year with a trip to Mt. Abram in Greenwood for some skiing. I had only been on the mountain once before — and that mountain was a bit smaller, Lost Valley in Auburn — so it goes without saying that I am a very very very beginner skier.

6 hours of skiing later, I feel more confident, but I worked hard for that confidence. Skiing is about controlling your direction and speed while going down a really steep slippery mountain. I’d look down from the lift and see all these kids just floating from side to side down the trail. Every time I tried to let myself succumb to gravity ever so slightly, my skis would catch on some snow or I’d panic that I lost control and would fall over.

And then you have to get up. Getting up is a bitch. You can’t use your legs at all — just your core and your arms — and I had no muscle memory on how to do this. Tony would show me how to fall over and he could come back up so easily. But for me, it was an ordeal that involved a lot of lying on my back and loud whimpering.

I wish I took pictures. It’s beautiful up there. It’s like the reward of hiking to the top of a tall mountain  without having to actually do the work of hiking. The best time for views was in the afternoon, when you could see the sun lighting up all the mountains beside it. But that was when the snow got really crunchy and hard to ski in, so I preferred the morning better.

According to this calculator, skiing burns 388 calories/hour for me. That seems a little optimistic, though. I thought about wearing my heart rate monitor on the hill, but this was supposed to be a day for learning and fun, not working out.

A 6-mile pace run was on the schedule for yesterday. I’m subbing the skiing cross training for the pace run, and I’ll do the pace run tomorrow instead.

11 miles was on the schedule today, but I screwed up and thought it was only 10. Dubs, its one mile.

Here was today’s run. I had plans to meet my friends at the Geiger School, which I thought was 3 miles from my house. 3 miles there, 4 miles with them, 3 miles back for 10 miles. But when I mapped it out, 5 minutes before I was planning to leave, I realized that the school was 3.6 miles away, not 3 miles away. I grabbed my shit and headed out the door ASAP, but without gloves or a warm hat or a neck gaiter.

MISERABLE wind. I turned around and decided to drive to the school instead. I’m glad I did, because that hat and gaiter and gloves were 100 percent necessary for today’s run.

I did 4 miles with them. It was great. The three of us, who trained for the Maine marathon together, hadn’t run together in months. Since at least November, and maybe even October.

I did the last 5 miles alone. My headphones died around mile 8, and my last mile without music ended up being a lot faster, even though I felt like I was going the same pace. Hmmm. Coincidence?

This was my first long run with the new shoes. I’m sold.

The arch support is really nice. And my concerns about the forefoot cushioning have been addressed. It’s actually a really bouncy, comfy, new shoe ride.

I got up to help Tony with a beer brewing task and this is what I found at my computer when I came back.

I told her I’d let her write a guest post some time, but she’s not that much of a runner.

Last night was not a proud moment.

The beginning of the day was really good. I had my oatmeal with chia seeds. Took a beautiful six-mile run at lunch. The kind of run where you go far enough and long enough that you’re just floating through landscape. You feel so separated from the stress of the world around you. I listened to a whole episode of This American Life and felt transported to another place.

I’m trying to be good after the Subway sandwich reality check and had a bowl of Progresso light soup for lunch after the run.

And no snacks.

So by 6:15 when I’m heading home from work, I am starving. I go grocery shopping starving, which is mistake and I drop $56 on what should have been a simple one-meal trip.

I’m so hungry that I buy a Snickers bar on the way out. “It’s OK,” I think. “I ran 6 miles today.”

Some friends came over for game night. I make a rice and beans burrito with salsa, cheese and avocado on a whole-wheat wrap. That was a wholesome dinner.

Then the drinking started. And I ate and ate and ate. Half a bag of baby carrots with light veggie dip. Which was really unsatisfying — I usually get Greek tzatziki dip — and I think that’s part of why I kept eating. I didn’t feel satisfied with how the food tasted. Moved on to beanitos and hummus. And guacamole dip. And some wasabi almonds.

And then — we ordered a pizza.

I had three slices of delicious, sweaty, greasy, meaty pizza at 11 p.m. I wasn’t even hungry, it was just there, and delicious.

(Not to mention all the alcohol calories on top of it.)

I just went to bed feeling so sick. And guilty. I woke up today with a food hangover. I felt sluggish and nauseated and bloated.

I know why it happened. Because …

• … I let myself get ravenously hungry to the point I was making poor food planning decisions, and
• … I thought I was ‘entitled’ because I had a long workout, and
• … I was stressed out and emotional about a family situation, and
• … I drank too much, which stimulates your appetite.

I know one day in the grand scheme of life doesn’t make or break things. But it doesn’t feel good either. Especially when you know how hard you have to work to burn just 300 calories.

Another great comic by the The Oatmeal. I love it!

At the gym: who is looking at whom – The Oatmeal.

Race or not.

Last night I came across this Subway nutrition calculator. Several days a week, I got to Subway and order one of three things:

• 12-inch Cold Cut Combo, 960 calories
•  12-inch Spicy Italian, 1145 calories
• 12-inch meatball sub, 1140 calories

Omph. Maybe it seems obvious — a foot-long sandwich is a very filling meal — but I didn’t think my usual lunch was a half-my-day’s-calories kind of affair.

It’s good to check in with this stuff every once and awhile, even if it feels like of course I know how many calories something is because I used to be so religious about it.