14 Ways to Show Love for Your Child This Valentine’s Day and Every Day

The following are Valentine’s Day tips from the American Academy of Pediatrics (AAP). Please feel free to excerpt these tips or use them in their entirety for any print or broadcast story with appropriate attribution of source. Click here for the Spanish Version.

1. Use plenty of positive words with your child.  Try to avoid using sarcasm. Children often don’t understand it, and if they do, it creates a negative interaction.

2. Respond promptly and lovingly to your child’s physical and emotional needs and banish put-downs from your parenting vocabulary. Be available to listen to your child when he/she want to talk with you even if it’s an inconvenient time.

3. Make an extra effort to set a good example at home and in public. Use words like “I’m sorry,” “please,” and “thank you.”

4. When your child is angry, argumentative or in a bad mood, give him a hug, cuddle, pat, secret sign or other gesture of affection he favors and then talk with him about it when he’s feeling better.

5. Use non-violent forms of discipline. Parents should institute both rewards and restrictions many years before adolescence to help prevent trouble during the teenage years. Allowing children of any age to constantly break important rules without being disciplined only encourages more rule violations.

6. Make plans to spend time alone with your young child or teen doing something she enjoys. Send a Valentine’s Day card to your older child or teen. Make Valentine’s Day cards together with your preschool or younger school age child.

7. Mark family game nights on your calendar so the entire family can be together. Put a different family member’s name under each date, and have that person choose which game will be played that evening.

8. Owning a pet can make children, especially those with chronic illnesses and disabilities, feel better by stimulating physical activity, enhancing their overall attitude, and offering constant companionship.

9. One of the best ways to familiarize your child with good food choices is to encourage him to cook with you. Let him get involved in the entire process, from planning the menus to shopping for ingredients to the actual food preparation and its serving. It is wonderful when families eat together as much as possible. Good food, good conversations.

10. As your child grows up, she’ll spend most of her time developing and refining a variety of skills and abilities in all areas of her life. You should help her as much as possible by encouraging her and providing the equipment and instruction she needs. Start reading to your child beginning at six months. Avoid TV in the first two years, monitor and watch TV
with your older children and use TV time as conversation time with your children. Limit computer and video games.

11. Your child’s health depends significantly on the care and guidance you offer during his early years. By taking your child to the doctor regularly for preventive health care visits, keeping him safe from accidents, providing a nutritious diet, and encouraging exercise throughout childhood, you help protect and strengthen his body.

12. Help your child foster positive relationships with friends, siblings and members of the community.

13. One of your most important gifts as a parent is to help your child develop self-esteem. Your child needs your steady support and encouragement to discover his strengths. He needs you to believe in him as he learns to believe in himself. Loving him, spending time with him, listening to him and praising his accomplishments are all part of this process.

14. Don’t forget to say, “I love you” to children of all ages!

American Academy of Pediatrics, 2/12

Become a Better Parent This Year by Michael Grose

Here are some simple ideas that will help you transform your parenting in less than a month.

1. Do more things with your kids and less things for them this year.

2. Raise your family with a Big family mindset.

3. Focus on your children’s well-being and mental health this year.

4. Make sure kids help at home without being paid.

5. Catch kids being resilient and persistent.

6. Avoid the first impulse when kids misbehave as it will often reinforce poor behaviour.

7. Reward responsibility with greater freedom.

8. Develop good sleep hygeine habits in your kids.

9. Strengthen your family by building a strong food culture.

10. Use a jobs roster to make sure kids help at home.

11. Spend one-on-one pleasurable time with each child each day.

12. Encourage kids to take social risks.

13. Be present mentally when you are with your kids.

14. Practice more shoulder-to-shoulder parenting.

15.Work out  the communication space in your home – that is, the place where you can really talk with your kids.

Holiday Stress and Anxiety in Children

The holidays are a fun and joyous time, but also a very busy one, and holiday stress and anxiety in children is a common occurrence. During the holidays, there are lots of fun activities and events going on, both at home and at school. And while that can be a good thing, the reality is that all that hustle and bustle means schedules are often out of whack, bedtimes get pushed back, and routines are disrupted. As a result, it’s inevitable that kids may feel some degree of holiday stress.

Holiday Stress and Anxiety in Children: How Parents Can Help

Set a calm example. The most important way parents can help ease anxiety in children during the holidays is by trying to keep things relaxed as much as possible. As with so many situations, the way parents handle an issue can set the tone for how their kids will behave. If you let holiday stress get to you, your kids will definitely pick up on it, and child anxiety is more likely to be a problem in your house. To minimize anxiety in children during the holidays, take steps to handle your own stress and anxiety.

Set up conditions for good behavior. Avoid taking your child to places such as the mall or holiday gatherings when he is hungry or tired. It’s hard even for grown-ups to deal with noise and lots of stimulation when they’re not feeling their best; kids get hungry more often and become tired more easily, and may understandably have a tough time being on their best behavior and are more likely to experience holiday stress when they’re exhausted or hungry.

Remember the importance of routines. The holidays can throw a big wrench into household routines, and that can play a role in anxiety in children. To minimize holiday stress in your kids, try to get routines back on track once an event or party is over. For instance, if a school holiday concert or a church gathering goes past your child’s bedtime, try to stick to quiet, calm activities the next day and get your child to bed on time the next night.

Watch what she’s eating. Another thing that can fall by the wayside amidst the holiday hubbub is healthy eating. Between all the extra sugary holiday snacks and the lack of time to sit down to regular meals, it can be all too easy for kids to eat less healthy foods, which can contribute to holiday stress and anxiety in children. Try packing healthy snacks when you have to go shopping or run other holiday errands and try to minimize the amount of sweet treats at home. Whenever possible, offer healthy snacks, such as air-popped popcorn or apple slices with cheese and crackers and limit cookies and candy to after-snack treats.

Get your child moving. Fresh air and exercise are essential for boosting mood and re-setting the spirit, which can alleviate holiday stress and anxiety in children. Make sure you schedule some time to get your child outside to run around and play.

Avoid overscheduling. As tempting as it may be to accept every invitation from friends and family, try to limit your holiday parties and activities so that you and your child are not overwhelmed. A couple of events a week may be fine, but having an obligation every day can lead to holiday stress and anxiety in children.

Have your grade-schooler help you. Big kids love to help mom and dad, especially if they get lots of praise for being responsible and helpful. If you have to shop, ask your child to help you look for an item at the store (fun stocking stuffers for cousins, for example). Giving your child a task will not only boost her self-esteem, it’ll distract her and help prevent any holiday stress and anxiety.

Schedule some quiet time. Having some peace and quiet with your child is more important than ever during the busy holiday season. Find a quiet corner and read a book with your child or create holiday pictures for grandma and grandpa. Take a walk outside in nature, away from noise and crowds and obligations.

Remind your child — and yourself — what the holidays are really all about. A great antidote for holiday stress and the bloated commercialism of the season is helping others.