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Understanding Fear

JWW — 2007-12-30 23:07:00

Some fear is healthy but often it can stop us fulfilling our hopes and dreams.

There are many kinds of fears relating to our lives: money, ill-health, love, work, how we appear to others. Often the biggest fear is that we can’t cope with what might come our way – but the truth is you can.

There are many examples of ordinary people ‘coming through’ and conquering their worst fears. This might involve acting with physical courage, helping and encouraging others, enduring major life and health set-backs and achieving more than they ever thought possible.

The more you face your negative demons – whether real events or vague worries about the future – the more you will build confidence in yourself.

Building self trust

The first element is to learn to trust yourself and your ability to cope. Go through the ways in which you have already earned this trust. Write them down. Now review it and include relevant details from the points below.

How much have you achieved in terms of:

• caring for/helping others
• doing your duty (not a buzz word, but essential for the whole human race to survive!)
• balancing the demands of family, home, work, friends, neighbours
• listening to others
• improving your work skills
• helping others to improve theirs
• making other people feel good
• being a trustworthy employee
• gaining qualifications
• learning from your mistakes

Add any of these which are missing from your list – it’s probably now a lot longer. You can surely trust the person with the qualities described here.

Now tell yourself you can handle things that might seem frightening by not letting your fear control you. You have the skills to handle the situation.**

Some research** has shown that over 90% of the fearful worries we have on a regular basis are unfounded, so remember this acronym:

• False
• Evidence
• Appearing
• Real
Taking control

Fear will always be present as long as you continue to challenge yourself (which will be as long as you live). It’s natural, it can be positive in helping us to reconsider actions, to reassess direction and to keep us alert.

However, the disabling instinct of fear of can be overcome by taking action, making things happen and thus building your self confidence. Remember, everyone is afraid of unfamiliar territory, whether it’s an unexpected event or an opportunity which will involve some risk taking.

Pushing through your fears is less frightening than ignoring your problems and never knowing if you could have succeeded. Feeling you have no control through refusing to ever take risks can increase fear and leave you feeling worse.

Assessing risk

Handle fear by empowering yourself: trust in your abilities and assure yourself that you can take control of whatever the situation is and make the most of it.

Trusting yourself is not an unrealistic idea that you can achieve anything. It means operating from the basis of what you know you can achieve and the determination to build on this to achieve more.

Operate from a position of power and love:

• take stock of your life -are you a victim or in control?

• do you know what it means to take responsibility for your whole life?

• do you blame others around you for your problems or are you in a constant bind of self-blame and low expectations?

Empower yourself: take control of the way you react to what happens in life by make a conscious decision to respond to every situation in a positive and creative way.

The way you experience life and the way you choose to behave and react to your experiences is up to you. Your thoughts will resolve into attitude and then actions; your actions will become your behaviour, your behaviour will determine your character and your character will in turn become your destiny.

Below are some examples of feelings associated with being powerless and helpless.

• Anger
• Upset
• Blaming
• Pain
• Self-pity
• Envy
• Helplessness
• Addiction
• Disappointment
• Jealousy

Gradually banish self doubt, that inner dialogue that undermines your ability to take action. Learn to practice meditation** to calm the incoherent chattering from within.

Replace self doubts with inner peace and love and begin to enjoy your own company.

Our society often meets positive thoughts with scepticism, however positive thought is empowering. Hypnotherapy techniques** and NLP** can help us to realise the power of self-suggestion: telling yourself you feel weak will have a measurable effect upon your strength at that moment. Therefore you can imagine the damage caused by constantly telling yourself that you’re not good enough.

Planning for a new future

If you’ve been in a long term negative cycle of complaining and criticising then changing such habits will happen slowly. But this can and will happen. Create an NLP programme to rewire your thoughts. Make a plan of action.

• Relax
• Set aside some time for yourself
• Set goals
• Find some inspirational quotes or music
• Practice incantations or affirmations
• Take immediate action, even just buying a notebook, but do it now

Replace negative thoughts with positive ones; listen to or read inspirational thoughts as you wake up. Try writing the pages**

Pay attention to the positive thoughts, meditate to remove mental clutter and you will find that repetition of positive thinking will displace old negative routines. Soon you will be aware of all the positive signs around you.
Keeping negativity at bay

If you feel yourself becoming negative take time to repeat and reinforce incantations and positive affirmations and energise yourself to take action.

Just smiling at someone and giving a simple (but genuine) compliment or thanks will make you feel better too.

Another tool to tackle fear is in the act of selfless deeds, becoming altruistic; just giving to get can lead to resentment. Learn how to give and experience the joy of giving. Notice the positivity and abundance in your life, remind your self of all the things you have to be thankful for and give thanks back to the world.

Become aware of how people have contributed to the person you are and take time to acknowledge their actions. This type of recognition will further strengthen your resolve.

Seek out ways of eliminating anger from your life. Change your language**and develop a positive vocabulary. Giving thanks and appreciation cost you nothing but can mean everything to those who you communicate these sentiments to.

When the unexpected happens to derail your dreams and ambitions accept those things that life sends your way. Use the positive techniques you have learned and accept appropriate help from others. Overcoming denial and apathy and saying yes allows you to take action, massive action.

Think of the things others have overcome in times of darkness; seek out stories of individuals who have overcome seemingly insurmountable problems. You will find places where the brave thrive and heroes are created.

Do not diet this new year!

JWW — 2008-01-05 22:28:43

Have you considered how much effort does it take to get yourself in to shape? Well according to the No Diet (Prof. Ben Fletcher et al) changes should be subtle and gradual and yet still have a dramatic effect on your waistline and general health. Like many programmes the diet is recommended to be trialled for 28 days, the book outlines a gradual loss of weight of about 2lb or roughly 1Kg, per week, this equates to two stones in 3 months.

The No Diet, takes a more philosophical approach to dieting, and relates to wider issues surrounding your life. As many of us can attest with first hand experience, traditional diets are hard work, your body feels it is being starved, so it’s survival and self preservation mechanisms kick in, fiercely combating all of your good intentions.

The No Diet Diet suggests small changes in behaviour and attitude can manifest in big changes in your waistline and even in your life as a whole. If you acknowledge the bodies basic need to consume food, and realise how fundamental this is, it becomes easier for us to understand why our bodies always seem to come back into ‘normal eating habits’
With traditional diets you might be familiar with feeling hungry all of the time and then over compensating with cream cakes.

! “Following the correct nutritional program will fill you full of energy and allow you to enjoy life!”

Some diets recommend cutting out certain food groups or carbohydrates for example, this can be difficult to monitor in social satiations for example.

Another problem with traditional diets is their tendency to make your weight ‘yo-yo’. Your body is under continual stress doing this time as it constantly reacclimatises to your new weight.

“But why are we overweight in the first place?”

The scientific answer to this would be consuming more calories than we metabolise, however this can be misleading and only leads to the question: Why are we consuming more calories than we are metabolising?

The research in the no-diet diet considers people who are in healthy weight range and made a comparison to those of us who are considered over-weight. Their findings are unexpected and illustrated more about their general attitude than their specific eating and exercise habits.
They suggest that people in their younger years tend to be, free thinking and open minded in their attitude to life, it is this attitude that forms a series of traits and habits which in turn determines our weight.

So the more flexible a personal is of thought the more likely they are to be happy contented and successful! Flexibility is considered to be incremental change, taking small steps, bringing a new challenge into your life to do something differently.

Taking time to enjoy life and be grateful for who you are and everything you have, taking time to appreciate the finer things around you, your pet, the sea side or even a wonderful meal?

The creators of this diet state that it has these five benefits:

1. Continuous loss of weight until you reach your natural optimum
2. Natural progress to your natural weight
3. Your weight will stay off
4. You will be healthier less prone to heart disease for example
5. You will be happier, both mind and body

In specific terms they also state you can loose 3.5Kg in 28 days time – worth a try? Good luck!

Try something new

JWW — 2008-01-07 22:10:36

Why not try something different in your life? Variety is spice of life afterall. Are you bound by the daily grind? Liberate yourself! decide to make a change by trying some new ideas. A perfect way to start is to have a little think about what your current habits are… are you a fast paced brea- neck adrenalin junkie type personality or more of the smooth gentle relaxed ilk. Either way a change is as good as a rest and it makes sense for you to bring your life into balance by trying some new ideas.

If you are a passive sort of a person that is helplessly and magnetically drawn to your televisions sets warm glow, night upon night, like a moth to flame? Consider injecting some enthusiasm into your life. Do you just wallop yourself down onto you couch and render your mind and body immobilised? Why don’t you try to break free energise yourself by trying something new and interesting. Yes this is your formal invitation to come bounding out of your comfort zone and develop yourself. Just think how much good use you could put those wasted hours in front of the TV.

The world has a seemingly limitless supply of new and interesting activities to take part in. Get inspired and start achieving those life long dreams and ambitions. Forget worshiping the tube on a daily basis. Try reading a good book, reading requires interpretation and imagination and can be really inspirational. I have included a list of recommended reading lists it does not have to be a book maybe a magazine, potentially something you never would have dreamed of reading previously.

Another great source of information and entertainment, if it hadn’t occurred to you before is listening to the radio, peruse the various stations that are available out there with DAB and internet radio stations your assured of finding something that you like, the great thing about audio is that you can you can multitask with it, and thanks to technology it’s incredibly portable, you can learn a language whilst jogging or going to work. Find a podcast or a station you dig and listen to it.

Did someone mention food? No? Well talking of food why not refresh your palate with a new and different intake of food stuffs, cooking can be a very enjoyable and social activity and indeed one that can occur in tandem with the above suggestions (the radio) . Think healthy freshly cooked juicy beautiful food, be creative, keep a log book of the recipes that you have created.

Not floating your boat? Try instigating a magical journey to a far away land, yes break your routine and get away from it all, even its only stay with a friend or a relative this type of journey will doubtless revive your mental state. Even a small change like exploring your local area and taking a different route can provide much needed stimulation into your cranium.

What about sport, no not cue television, I’m thinking about you actually getting involved and participating in a local club this is great way to meet new people and get some much need exercise in the process, even better why not go out on limb and experiment with yoga or a martial art? Always consult your quack before embarking on a new exercise program.

Failing that you could kindle your creative side don a beret and become an artist, buy some water colours or taking up a musical instrument this kind of creative expression can be extremely liberating, as you unleash the full extent of your imagination.

Maybe you prefer a more people orientated approach? have you considered volunteering there are countless opportunities out there that enrich your life and bring a wealth of experience along with them .

These are just a small selection of ideas but you get the idea the list could be much longer infact I have included a bullet poited list of other ideas for you consideation below

1. write a book
2. be happy
3. Paint
4. drink more water
5. go on a road trip
6. get married
7. travel the world
8. see the northern lights
9. Kiss in the rain
10. Take more pictures
11. win the lottery
12. pay off loans
13. become a millionaire
14. stick to a budget
15. retire early
16. invest
17. Fall/Stay in love
18. travel the world
19. become financially independent
20. Learn to play the guitar
21. Make new friends
22. Read more books
23. Learn to cook
24. learn sign language
25. Buy a House
26. Swim with dolphins
27. Learn to play the piano
28. Travel
29. Learn to surf
30. identify 100 things that make me happy
31. live passionately
32. learn to dance
33. learn to sail
34. graduate from college
35. Be a better friend
36. Have a baby
37. backpack
38. Volunteer
39. Practice Yoga
40. write a song
41. love myself
42. work because I like to
43. go to college
44. be a better person
45. Learn to knit

Good luck

Improving productivity and keeping your sanity

JWW — 2008-01-09 22:16:25

You may be busy, but it is feasible to lead a relaxed life whilst maintaining efficient productivity. You already have the skills you need for a measured, considered approach to a hectic life.

Small, common-sense changes will gradually overcome old habits (and for those of you with a computing background this works much like a programme):

 decide on everything that needs to be done (inputs)
 organise, do, plan and prepare (processing)
 pass information to others who need it. (outputs)

Our work life today is dynamic and complex; the workplace is in constant flux and our jobs develop rapidly in different ways to meet the ever-changing needs of our customer and client base. This constant change can lead to fear,** confusion and anxiety. However, it is possible to counter these negatives in two ways: using modern technologies and a holistic approach.

A large component of effective work is about maintaining an appropriate state of mind to cope with the levels of work our jobs demand, thus providing an exact, measured response to all aspects of work.

How to begin
Everything that you need to do on a daily, weekly, monthly and annual basis can be recorded and scheduled, using the following as a guide:

1 specify what you will do
2 sequence the order in which you will do tasks
3 set up a process to remind you to do tasks at a certain time.

Often productivity is reduced due to lack of clearly defined requirements. If you are managing others tell your staff exactly what you need them to do as part of the team**:

1 say it
2 let staff write it down** e.g. notice-board or automatic e.mails
3 remind people as required.

If you are part of the team and you do not understand what you are expected to do, then ask your manager to explain – clearly and more than once if necessary.
For both managers and the team this is part of good communication skills** which are essential to productive work. Without communication, the strong framework that is essential for success will be missing.

Jobs that we hate
People who are naturally creative frequently shy away from routine filing and organisation. However, the human mind tends not to track time and events with the accuracy of a calendar, it just sends you an intuitive feeling that you haven’t quite completed something.

Until these ‘must-do’ jobs are scheduled and you are committed to doing them, you will suffer that nagging feeling of uncertainty as your brain tries to make sense of all the unprocessed tasks you are required to do.

Once you have the habit of recording and scheduling 100% of your short, medium and long term tasks and processes, then your creative mind** is free to generate ideas on the kind of work that often gets real results.

The first three steps to efficiency
The way to go about effective task management is as follows:

1 gather all of the required information (places people dates etc.)
2 attach a meaning to them (who, what, where, why, when is a good place to start)
3 organise your findings and schedule. (What needs to be thrown away, what do you need to keep for reference? Put relevant dates into your calendar.)

To make your work life even more efficient:

4 use automation where possible - electronic devices including email, answer-phone messages and faxes
5 you can also capture your thoughts/plans/intentions with a voice recorder.

And finally, review to monitor progress at least once a week.

Be human
Don’t try to do all of this at once. You can schedule a time to put each of these steps in place. Do this regularly until every aspect of work is in your new schedule.

Once you have completed this reorganisation not much will be required to maintain the system. During your weekly review of progress make three lists: what needs to be added in, taken out and amended. Act on this.

And relax.

Life is unique

JWW — 2008-01-16 18:50:32

Many of us share in a limited set of beliefs, in part science has shunned beliefs in higher cause or design. When I was young I was given the explanation of death as being similar to a television being switched off, thus we are extinguished and reduced to nothing, the power has gone so have all the familiar sounds and colourful animation, still lifeless and displaced from reality a stark image.

For many science adds credence to this theory, Science believes in a definable, measurable and ultimately repeatable set of laws that govern our reality.
Although interestingly, this set of beliefs can and does change over time.

Has the magic and deep mystery of life has been vanquished? Dragons do not exist, the world is round; what science cannot define and reproduce is discarded.

The basis for Science and its ability to measure has its own limitations, measurements have a mathematical basis, which can theoretically represent an infinite number, and any measurement made could be more accurate, with potentially smaller measurements always being rounded for a best fit.

In this way, everything we experience, touch and see is unique, made to a similar but not exact standard. On close enough inspection all that we see has its own unique character, I believe the world is not as predictable and mundane as some might fear.

It\'s our choice, that which we decide to accept or refute in this life, and our belief system which supports our understanding and interpretation for the world as we experience it.

Becoming

JWW — 2008-01-16 22:58:52

What is the secret to modifying your behaviour, in any given situation? How can you become the person you know rationally that you could be if fear or other negative qualities didn’t set you back?

At certain times in our lives we need to behave in way that is appropriate to the situations we find ourselves in; at the interview we become formal, at the party cheerful and humorous, with our loved ones intimate and open.

It’s not unusual for each of us to wear different hats at different times in our lives and act in ways that are befitting with circumstance, but is it possible to evolve this philosophy and demonstrate extraordinary character during those times when we need to be at our best and be all that we can be.

One technique is that of becoming, studying or creating a character that you give yourself permission to step into. It be likened to an steps an actor takes when they become a character, a massively powerful technique using the power of your imagination, you can become anyone.

If you are naturally an introverted person, you might feel you simply could not snap your fingers and change your behaviour, however, it is the case that many actors are shy people too, they research their role and become the person in their mind.

The more detail and information you can gather when deciding to enter into this process the better. Method actors perform this trick for a living and consider questions like: how do they think? What motivates this person. What do they eat? What do they wear? how do they hold themselves, what is their stance their posture? How do they breathe? How do they talk, pay attention to subtleties such as dialect, accent as well as inflection in the voice.

Once you have fully researched your character now you must deliberately rehearse the new desired behaviour. At first this may feel unnatural, but you will be developing a new routine as you hardwire this process into your mind.

This method works really well with the use of a role model, you are acting until your behaviour feels natural. It is advisable to practice this new state of mind in privacy before you begin to practice in more social situations. Make sure you are relaxed and use the power of visualisation, make yourself aware of all of the models characteristic you wish to assimilate.

Now imagine yourself in the future having assumed all of the characteristics you have noted in the previous step. Ask yourself, how does it feel?

You can also use this mindset to answer questions or challenges you face, how would someone of this mindset answer a certain question? What would they do?

A final word of caution however, it is important that you when set about developing your own character, remain true to your values and beliefs.

Balance your life

JWW — 2008-01-16 23:11:51

In order to improve, you need to work out where you are, assess your current situation and the then go about planning for your future here you can realistically set goals allowing you to continually improve.

Have you worked out where you want to go in life? each second of your day, each minute of your day counts; as time marches forward, don’t forget to look ahead to see you are going in the right direction

In other words - take stock, think about what’s important to you and in doing this try to achieve a balanced life take each aspect of your life, such as relationships, career, finances and consider its importance, how well are doing at that particular time?

Health do you eat well? Eat plenty of nutritious food? Are you suffering any conditions ailments diseases? Are you energetic do you exercise every day? these are the kind of questions we should be asking ourselves. As you must be aware there is plenty of information & literature available on the Internet ect. the fact is that many of us know what we should be doing when it comes to health but we simply don't take advantage of our knowledge.

Do you have a healthy and effective sleep pattern? do you get enough rest? What is the quality of your sleep like? Do you wake up feeling refreshed and ready to encounter the next day? take stock of where you are right now.

Do you enjoy relationships with your family are they caring relationships do you help each other? are people prepared to spend time with each other in your family? if you think the way your family works could be better make a note. Does your partner is make you feel special do you make them feel special make a decision tell your self how well it is actually going and record it.

How well do you do with money is the case that is soon as money comes in goes out, do you have financial strategies in place or are you sinking further and further into debt? think carefully about the money matters in your life if you are one of the people that can say exactly how much money is going in and out of each one of your accounts and you have a financial plan in place a contingency plan? Do you not borrow money unless its affordable? do you feel comfortable about money?

One of the most important aspects of your life must be relationships. What do your friends say about you? How about the people at work? Consider the people all around you take some time to think about the way you get on. Do people respect you? How would colleague describe your personality?

What about your planning? have you decided what you do with the rest of your life and know where you are going to be each point do you have long-term medium-term and short-term plans? Do you know you really want to do with your life? Do you have a purpose? Anyone who ever achieved anything in life started out with a thought and developed it.

How do you feel about work? Exhausted? do you wish away each day and count down the days until the weekend if you do that your wishing you life away acknowledging a problem will strengthen your chances of finding a solution.

How committed are you to making that change, have you got passion? Do you get excited when you think about the possibilities of the things that could happen in your life are you courageous about improving your lot? Do you enjoy expanding your mind and improving your fitness? if you could make an improvement note it down.

The chances are that in some aspect of your life you can grow and improve. The whole purpose of assessing your life in this holistic way is to try improve your situation by improving one aspects in your life it will impact and strengthen the other categories in your life too. for example if you improve your health, energy and vitality this will serve to improve other aspects of your life like relationships and a the ability to think clearly and plan, thus achieving harmony and balance.

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Designing your goals

JWW — 2008-01-16 23:14:49

Some of you might have taken some time to think about who you are and what you want to do with your lives(your purpose)

That must bring up the quesiton how do you get there? well this is where goals come in.

Most people will be familiar with this idea, goals orientate you
give you a compass and a sence of direction as you move through your life.

It\'s really important that you are consciouly aware of where you want to be at various points in your life in 5 years 10 years etc.
it gives you something to aim towards and helps you to focus and prioritise.

Bringing your hearts desires and dreams into being requires planning, and creating a system to record your progress. If you state your goals in a journal you can reference them at a later date; you could do this electronically or by simply by using a pen. Until your goals are recorded outside of your own mind they will remain wishes.

As you progress (or not) keep referencing and adjusting them accordingly. As you go through life you will undoubtedly encounter obstacles and resistance to achieving. Again recording and monitoring your goals allows you to reevaluate and plot a new course of action for yourself during difficult times.

Recording and monitoring your goals allows our thoughts to permeate into our subconscious, having recorded our goals allows the power of our entire mind to synchronise and begin to seek out the resources and opportunities to reach our goals.

Science refers to a filtering of the brain that occurs as we make sense of the world. Billions of strands of information enter our mind we are conditioned to notice that which is relevant
(Ever noticed how things appear to more abundant when you focus on them)

Some folks recomend using SMART goals:

Specific Just concentrate all of your attention on accomplishing one thing.

Measurable Add metrics to your goals, state exactly how you would quantify its completion so that you can say definitively if you did it ow not.

Achievable and Realistic Don\'t set yourself up to fail, ask your self if you can do what you set out to do in the alloted time.As you goals in the present tense \"I am fit and able to run 10 miles\"
to improve motivation. Remember the to keep levels of motivation high when your outlining a goal, phrase it in the here and now, “I am thin” your mind will focus on your thoughts more effectively this way. Make your goals personal, using words like me or I, be as selfish as you want here remember succeeding in these goals will strengthen your resolve and enable you to accomplish more.

Timed Set a time line for the completion of the goal, not to distant (demotivating) or too close (unrealsitic
) try to find a Zen like balance between the two.Remember, no goal would be complete without establishing a time frame, you need to be realistic here and reschedule the completion date of your goals. Stay focused but also celebrate your achievements as they take place - stay on track. Each time you reach a milestone or a marker you have delineated make a conscious choice to plot your progress.

SuccessHow will you prove that you have done it, how can you evidence the fact? How will you feel? use the power of your imagination.

It has been pointed out that SMART goals only yield results for some types of people, and if this is case try turning the model on it\'s head set unrealistic goals with unrealistic deallines if this is what motivates you.

Consider the type of goals you are setting, you can put them into different types:

outcome related goals would be \"living in a new home\"

performance related goals would be losing 10lb\'s... a performance goal should always be achievable!

Specify your goals by asking yourself questions: what, where who why when and how? build a picture of everything involved with your new goal.

A we have said, set ambitious yet realistic goals that allow you to succeed and build upon that success, put these goals into a timeframe.

For larger goals remember to \"chunk\" your goals down into smaller activities. Focus on achieving small steps but remember to keep the bigger picture in mind.

Improve your motivation by considering the benefit achieving your goals will bring into your life. it\'s crucial to keep in mind the long term gains your strategy will bring. Make the right choices –whatever your are focusing on.

Remember to constantly orientate yourself towards your goals until you realise them. Always consider the net benefit these goals will bring to you and decide to commit and take action. As ever It\'s important to stay positive, and all goals should be phased as such... “I look fantastic now I’ve lost 10lB’s”.

Take time to outline any possible problems that you might encounter on your journey, if you understand yourself (and your own weaknesses) you could for example factor in your own stubbornness or lack of motivation. Brainstorm any potential threats or dangers to achieving the outcome that you wish to achieve. Don’t stop when you\'re on track or loose momentum, once your forewarned with possible threats you can strategise how to counteract them. You must plan for success. It\'s no good saying I’m going to diet and then dive into the food store and buy a truck load of candy – buy in healthy food, shape and design your environment in a way that is conducive to your success.

Follow the advice above and follow through on your goals, this is your life, it’s important that you stay true to yourself and enjoy the fruits of your success as you manage to turn your dreams in your destiny.
Don’t get complacent and rest on your laurels it\'s, onwards and upwards keep striving, persist until your succeed, but *always* enjoy the journey.

Your purpose

JWW — 2008-01-17 23:44:06

According to the psychologist Abraham Maslow we all have a series or hierarchy of needs that we strive to fulfil to achive these include: Physiological Needs Safety Needs, Needs of Love, Affection and Belongingness,Needs for Esteem and finally when all of the above are satisified
Needs for Self-Actualization

Maslow describes self-actualization as a person's need to be and do that which the person was "born to do." "A musician must make music, an artist must paint, and a poet must write." These needs make themselves felt in signs of restlessness. The person feels on edge, tense, lacking something, in short, restless. If a person is hungry, unsafe, not loved or accepted, or lacking self-esteem, it is very easy to know what the person is restless about. It is not always clear what a person wants when there is a need for self-actualization.

This article like many others you will find on the subject is about you finding your purpose. It is about looking inside yourself and considering why you are here, once you have connected with your reason for being, this knowledge will affect all of your future decisions and actions.

How can you decide upon your purpose, what enters into your mind when you ask such questions of yourself? Material possessions? Happiness? A family? Do you want to go through your life not having done the things you would have wished? what are these things?

Our values and beliefs come into alignment and we become the expression of the best part of ourselves when we live true to our sense of purpose.

When considering your own purpose it's important you look beyond the normal parameters of your life. Your sense of purpose will deeply resonate, ignite your emotions and give you clarity. For many people aligning themselves with a purpose represents a paradigm shift in their lives (See Covey for on paradigms)

The first step uncovering your purpose is to look forward and imagine yourself in the future, where do you want to be: Consider a range of aspects in your life.

• Your relationships
• Your Career
• Your finances
• Your Health

Imagine yourself at a fixed point in the future. When doing this your must find a peaceful space that is completely free of distractions, consider where you want to go in life, imagination what people are saying about you in the future or imagine how you want to look, where you want to be, or want you want to have achieved. What comes to the forefront of your mind, what can you see? Do any keyword emerge, happiness, communicating, to teach and learn?

Now imagine the space that you take up in this world the impression that leave, how you affect everyone and everything in your life, consider your personality and the way you interact with colleges friends and family.

How do others view you, what defines you? What is your net impact on this world?

Consider the people you know or have ever known in turn, surmise what they would believe your contribution to the world to be. Record these thoughts as they come to you I recommend the use of a mind map to do this. Using a mind map will allow you to highlight and illustrate the various themes that have emerged, look for key verbs or adjectives that can be used as keywords.

Some of these thoughts may be in opposition with one another, don’t let contradicting thoughts thwart your progress, allow your mind to roam freely. You may want to do this chronologically from your earliest memory or just let your mind wander through your thoughts.

Your notes should eventually be a considerable size and you will need some means of distilling these thoughts of this to formulate your purpose.

Create a concise statement that accurately encapsulates all of the ideas you have uncovered to reveal your purpose.

Use the keywords you selected, remember, despite being a generalised statement, your purpose can be tuned has you progress through life, as your experiences and circumstances change your wording my reflect the changes.

Values

JWW — 2008-01-18 18:21:46

Having decided your purpose You can further benefit from clarification of your values, your values are a set of core principles that govern every decision you make, If we truly know what is important to us we can effectively plan our lives. Because of their great significance I believe values add an emotional dimension to your actions and decisions; if your purpose is derived from the soul then your values will be determined by your heart. Do you know what you stand for? Do you know what matters most to you in life?

You can begin to assess your own values by asking yourself what state of mind you best prefer to be in, fun, positive etc.

You will already hold many values close to your heart and they can be reveled by questioning yourself:

What one trait would you pass on to your children?
What one word should represent our societies aspirations?

Do you know what you stand for? Do you know what is important to you?
Values are a powerful force. Being clear about your values will be a powerful ally to you when solving problems.

Use the "Clarify my values" tool in the user area to record your five most important values in life. Make sure your values are realistic don't get tangled in an over-complicated set of rules that are bound to result in failure and not let you feel the joy of your own success.

Below are some examples of values

Inventive

Daring

Imaginative

Ingenious

Experimental

Venturous

Inspirational

Augmentive

Coaching

Assisting

Sparky

Encouraging

Strengthening

Influential

Facilitative

Stimulating

Energising

Learned

Perceptive

Emotive

Discerning

Distinguishing

Sensational

Graceful

Refined

Elegant

Attractive

Radiant

Blissful

Magnificence

Amusing

Glorious

entertained

Tasteful

Influential

Enlightening

Informing

Edifying

Reigning

Priming

Explaining

Persuasive

Encouraging

Adept

Connected

Superior

Family

Primacy

Integrated

standards

Excellence

Tenderness

Prevalence

Accomplishment

Perception

Empathy

Acquisition

Support

Compassion

Triumph

Responsibility

Attraction

Awareness

Acceptance

Honor

Passion

Face your Future

JWW — 2008-01-18 20:31:22

How much time do you spend thinking about what is to come in your life? Have you considered where you will be in five years time, ten years time? Many of simply don’t consider these questions, but why should you be content to simply watch your life unfold (or crumble) in front of you? Many of seem to drift along without even raising the question where are we going, well if you wish to differentiate yourself from the masses a corner stone to this transformation must be for you to spend some time (some quality time) pondering your future.

Remember , everything is created in the mind first. exercising your power of imagination is a process that will allow you to clearly focus on the direction in which you wish to go, vividly imagination your future the way you want it repeatedly until you become entirely familiar this vision, imagine it in such depth and clarity has such that it feels real.

Your vision should be tempered by your Values and purpose

By having your own vision you ensure you don’t get carried along with the another persons ambitions and drive by understanding exactly where it is you wish to go.

You must devote some time to this activity and it is a perfect opportunity to spend some time with your partner, in fact why not listen to each others dreams and use the power of both of your imaginations. Start by putting yourself in a positive frame of mind and list all of the things either one of you has accomplished at home at work and in the many other spheres of your lives. Now begin to visualise you future.

This process won’t work unless you find a way to bring it life. You can facilitate this process by asking yourself some engaging questions:

• What will you be doing, what progress will you have made in your career?
• Where will I be living?
• Who will you be with?

Adding detail into your imaginings will allow you have a more ‘real’ and memorable experience.

Take some time to really clarify where you want to be, pay attention to all of the detail in your imagination making use of NLP's so called 'sub-modalities' such as:

Visual
Size
Distance
Brightness
Colour or monochrome
Shape: convex, concave, specific shape
Variations: looping, fading in and out, moving location
Voice: voices, one or many
Kinesthetic(propreceptive, somatic)
Proprioception: Somatic sensation, location, movement
Tactition: pressure, texture
Thermoception: temperature
(Adapted from Wikipedia)

Really pay attention to the detail of your vision take a deep breath of the air in the future, listen to the leaves rustling under your feet, it is these thought that will motivate you. If you are undertaking this exercise with a partner you could imagine an older version of yourself reminiscing over those many accomplishments in life?

Don't be put off by any feedback you receive whilst in this process, if you become flooded with reasons by you should not do something this can be extremely useful in its self.

This process can also be used to explore your Values and purpose

Of couse, upon realising exactly where you wish to be, you can get there by setting stepwise, realistic goals.

Harvesting the power of positive language.

JWW — 2008-01-26 18:58:34

We use language as a framework that defines our thoughts, it conveys our innermost feelings and is the backbone of communication. You will often hear people relay the benefits of a positive mindset.

With the above in mind have you noticed how people often seem fearful of expressing themselves in a definite, positive fashion. Take the culture of the workplace, people can be found using language such as “Oh, I can’t complain” to describe their general state of mind, this a real indication that an infusion of passion is needed.

Of course communication is not restricted to verbal exchanges and people’s tone and body language etc is vitally important to get right to but today lets just focus on the words.

On a personal level, keeping track of the language that your are using, can be an invaluable tool. Identify the negative responses you have automatically adopted, and improve your awareness of your active negative vocabulary. This will help you to master your own thoughts as well as giving you an idea of how others perceive you.

In extreme cases negative thoughts and patterned responses can become so ingrained that peoples interactions with those around then can become destructive. Many of us are familiar with someone whose mode of communication is wholly or predominately characterised by the use of negative language, interactions with this type of personality can be extremely draining.

Such responses may not be a result of generally negative attitudes or beliefs, some people are simply unaware of the huge impact their language. Taking time to think about your active vocabulary and the context in which you have decided to use it can dramatically improve your relationships with others.

An example: Imagine you come home from work to find that your partner has forgotten to post some important documents. one response could be?

“Oh, why do you forgot that, you ALWAYS do that and now it’s late, how could you?”

What do you notice? Firstly the statement is confrontational and uses an absolute label “ALWAYS” in addition to this no constructive offering is made and no attempt to positively connect with the other party.

When trying to reemphasize our language (for the positive) there are some simple and straight-forward techniques we can apply:
• Let the other party know what constructive changes can be made
• Use tones of motivation and encouragement
• Ensure you relay alternative ways to proceed
• Highlight actions and their positive consequences
• Use a respectful positive anchor when relaying bad news

When conversing with others a negative mindset can not only cause confusion but also undermine trust and respect.

Once you have monitored your language in various situations you can be deliberately judicial with any negative phases that may become apparent.

Of course you need to replace negativity with a more positive framework, and to this I recommend you regularly familiarise your self with positive language. Some positive words are listed below try using them every day.

Able
Acceptance
Accomplished
Achieving
Acknowledging
Acquiescent
Active
Adoring
Advanced
Affirming
Agreeable
Alert
Alive
Altruistic
Ambitious
Amusing
Angelic
Appealing
Appreciative
Approachable
Approving
Aspiring
Assertive
Assisting
Assured
Attentive
Attractive
Awake
Aware
Balanced
Beautiful
Believing
Benevolent
Bestowing
Blameless
Blessed
Boundaries
Bountiful
Bravery
Calm
Capable
Careful
Caring
Caution
Certain
Charitable
Charming
Cheerful
Clean
Clear
Comforting
Committed
Compassionate
Concerned
Confirming
Conscientious
Considerate
Consoling
Content
Contributing
Controlled
Co-operative
Correct
Courageous
Courteous
Creative
Cultured
Curiosity
Daring
Decent
Dedicated
Delicate
Decisive
Delightful
Detached
Determination
Devotion
Devout
Diligent
Discerning
Disciplined
Discretion
Discriminating
Distinctive
Distinguished
Dynamic
Eager
Earnest
Educated
Efficient
Eloquent
Empathy
Empowering
Encouraging
Energetic
Enkindled
Enlightened
Enterprising
Enthusiastic
Equitable
Excelling
Exciting
Faithful
Fearless
Fidelity
Firm
Flexible
Focused
Forbearing
Forceful
Forgiving
Fortitude
Free
Fresh
Friendly
Fruitful
Fulfilled
Generous
Gentle
Gifted
Giving
Glad
Glorious
Goal-oriented
Graceful
Gracious
Grateful
Growing
Happy
Hardy
Harmless
Harmonious
Healing
Helpful
Honest
Honorable
Hopeful
Hospitable
Humane
Humble
Humor
Idealistic
Illuminated
Illustrious
Imaginative
Impartial
Important
Improving
Independent
Individual
Industrious
Innocent
Integrity
Intelligent
Interested
Intimate
Intuitive
Involved
Joyful
Just
Kind
Knowing
Knowledgeable
Learned
Lively
Lofty
Logical
Loving
Lowly
Loyal
Lucid
Magnanimous
Majestic
Masterful
Mature
Meaningful
Meek
Merciful
Model
Moderate
Modest
Moral
Motivated
Mover
Mystical
Noble
Nourishing
Nurturing
Obedient
Objective
Observant
Open
Optimistic
Orderly
Organized
Original
Passionate
Patient
Peaceful
Penitent
Perceptive
Persevering
Persistent
Pleasing
Polite
Positive
Powerful
Practical
Prayerful
Prepared
Productive
Progressive
Proper
Protective
Proud
Provider
Prudent
Pure
Qualified
Quiet
Questioning
Radiant
Rational
Reasonable
Receptive
Refined
Reflective
Relaxed
Reliable
Religious
Renown
Repentant
Resigned
Respectful
Responsible
Responsive
Restrained
Revealing
Reverent
Righteous
Sacrificial
Sanctified
Satisfied
Searching
Seeker
Seemly
Sensitive
Service-oriented
Simplicity
Sincere
Spiritual
Spontaneous
Steadfast
Strength
Striving
Submissive
Successful
Supportive
Sympathetic
Tactful
Temperate
Tenacious
Tender
Thoughtful
Thriving
Tolerant
Toughness
Tranquil
Trusting
Trustworthy
Truthful
Unconcerned
Understanding
Unfailing
Unrestrained
Unselfish
Uplifting
Valiant
Victorious
Vigilant
Virtuous
Visionary
Vital
Warm
Well
Wisdom
Wonderful

Balance your life

JWW — 2008-01-27 21:29:42

I wanted to write something about improving our awareness of ourselves. In order to improve your lot, it\'s worth working out where you are, assess your current situation and the then go about planning for your future. Only from this point of understanding can you realistically set goals allowing you to eventually improve.

This might seem basic but it is often something that we avoid doing this type of self assessment as it can actually uncover some uncomfortable home truths.

Have you worked out where you want to go in life? Well if your like many of us perhaps not but as each second of each day passes; don’t forget to look ahead to see if you are headed in the right direction

Simply said - take stock, think about what’s important to you. Take each aspect of your life, such as relationships, career, finances and consider its importance?

Consider each dimension like your health, do you eat well? Eat plenty of nutritious food? Are you suffering any conditions ailments diseases? Are you an energetic person? do you exercise every day? these are the kind of questions you should be asking. take time to record these thoughts. As you will be aware there is plenty of information & literature available, for you to research. The fact is that many of us know what we should be doing when it comes to health but often we simply don\\\'t take advantage of our knowledge.

Related to health have you consiered if you have a healthy and effective sleep pattern? do you get enough rest? What is the quality of your sleep like? Do you wake up feeling refreshed and ready to encounter the new day?

Moving on to thinking about people now, do you enjoy relationships with your family do you help each other with your dreams and goals? are people prepared to spend time with each other in your family? Does your partner is make you feel special? make a note.

How well do you do with money? Is it the case that as soon as money comes in... it just goes out, do you have financial strategies in place or are you sinking further and further into debt? Think carefully about the money matters in your life. Are you are one of the people that can say exactly how much money is going in and out of each one of your accounts? Do you have a financial plan in place a contingency plan? Do you avoid borrowing money unless its affordable? do you feel comfortable about money?

One of the most important aspects of your life must be relationships. What do your friends say about you? How about the people at work? Consider the people all around you take some time to think about the way you get on. Do people respect you? How would colleague describe your personality?

What about your ability to plan and think about the future, have you decided what you do with the rest of your life? Do you have long-term medium-term and short-term plans?

Enough questions already but do you have a purpose? \"Anyone who ever achieved anything in life started out with a thought and developed it.\"

How do you feel about work? Exhausted? Do you wish away each day and count down the days until the weekend.. if this is you you\\\'re wishing you life away, acknowledging a problem will strengthen your chances of finding a solution.

Well once once you\'ve thought about these kinds of questions you might decide how committed you are to making that change have you got passion? Do you get excited when you think about the possibilities of the things that could happen in your life are you courageous about improving your lot?

The chances are that in some aspect of your life you can grow and improve. The whole purpose of assessing your life in this holistic way is as you go about improving each aspect in your life it will impact and strengthen the other categories too. For example if you improve your health, energy and vitality this will serve to improve other aspects of your life like relationships and the ability to think clearly and plan, thus achieving that Zen like harmony and balance.

Asking yourself these type of powerful questions will help you to work out where you are in life, and give you that road map to help you get where you need to go. Try looking at the life balance tool in the user area of personal-evolution for a graphical representation of your life.

Breaking the cycle

JWW — 2008-02-02 20:11:27

Come on admit it, we all have our negative habits although they vary dramatically, from smoking and gambling to shopping. The chances are, at some point in these negative routines you have given some time to considering how you would like quit, and make a change. So why can’t you?

Why does the very thing we know we shouldn’t be doing seem so appealing? Is our own nature to blame?

Breaking a habit is difficult because your mind, behaviour and all of your subconscious routines are synchronised with the habit, for example what do you do when you watch TV? Snack? Our brains work via association and it is this very principle that governs the resistance we find when trying to ‘break’ an old routine, during this time (watching T.V in this case) you’ll undoubtedly find yourself thinking about whatever it is you know you shouldn’t be doing… dreaming or craving for cigarettes, cream cakes etc.

And the oft used technique of attempting to use language to negate these desires only serves to intensify them “don’t think of cream cakes” will, only leave you drooling for more.
Positive language is hugely important if you what some ideas
for phrases you goals in a positive way, look this articleor consider the positive word generator in the user area of Personal Evolution.

Where is the gratification or satisfaction in simply denying all of the various cues towards a certain apparently desirable behaviour?

So instead of leaving an almighty rift in your mind where the old routines were, in place allow a new positive association to flourish. What can you do to reform your previous mindset? Trying something new is always a fantastic response in fact I have written some short ideas here. Whether it be training to get a black belt or writing poetry, your goals should motivate and inspire you.

Of course this process only works when one is committed to change, do you really want to bring massive change into your life? If not now, when (maybe a date for your diary) whatever or whenever you decide the process of change requires complete commitment on your part. How do you manifest this level of commitment? Having new goals set in alignment with you own set of core beliefs and values will be a strong factor in strengthening your resolve, as will having a clear mental image or visualisation of where you want to be. Stay focused on your new goal, until you arrive.

Being paid for doing whatever you love

JWW — 2008-02-17 16:06:46

Don\'t you just know it, there are so many people in the world who would rather be doing something else with their lives, we haveour little passions and interests that we consider simply a hobby and most unlikely to earn any level of income let alone a living. So the question is, is there a way of being paid for doing that which you love?

Zig Ziglar said repeatedly “You can get everything in life you want if you just help enough other people get what they want”
Does it not therefore stand to reason that if you have an indelible passion, and that others could benefit from this passion as you do too?

If in undertaking such activities you genuinely provide a valuable service or produce. (I\'m still trying to figure out if drinking beer counts) It is likely you will be able to derive some level of income from this source, if people want or need it they will buy it.

How can you go about sharing your interests, hobbies or skills with others. Well an obvious medium my fine tech-loving is the internet, a proliferation of tools and providers exist all vying for your business unpicking such things can be a task in itself, the rewards however can be worth the time and effort required.

You can of course choose more traditional channels including print and publishing to make others aware of what you have to offer.

Lets look at an example, Imagine a young man called Peter, or Burt who is currently working in a pharmaceutical store to, as he puts it “pay the bills”, as you can imagine this is certainly not work that inspires or interests him. Peter (or was it Burt) is passionate about learning languages. How can Peter do what he enjoys doing and be paid in the process? Well one option is to switch jobs, look at jobs that require linguists or translators.

This is great but why stop there? Many internet companies have translation teams Peter could work remotely for one of them, or even begin an endeavour of his own. Peter could advertise to be a tutor or translator in his spare time, perhaps offer in his services for free, as a start to bootstrap him into a stronger position.

When your confidence, increases you can in turn begin to raise your expectation of what you may receive, but as with all things you must do the work before you can be paid.

Getting out there and making yourself known to others is really important, when trying to establish your self people are (of course) your greatest resource, people can encourage and improve your efforts and can pave the way to you realising your ambition whatever it may be.

Have you ever heard of the “5 degrees of separation” stating that, you know someone, who knows someone, who knows someone, who knows someone, who knows anyone. It\'s power is exponential, if what you have to offer is well received, introduction by word of mouth will spread rapidly and soon the rabid hordes will be bludgening a path to your door.

Of course being thrifty also comes into the equation, we all only have so much time and logic dictates that sacrificing some of your paid time, will mean less money and sensibly adjusting your expenditure to compensate.

It be may of course even after following your hopes and dreams you are still having difficulty in realising your goals, this can be a reality check for some people but don’t accept failure as a condition only a mechanism of feedback that will inform and inspire your latest and greatest efforts. (keep going, never surrender) If people are not interested their advice can be invaluable allowing you to fine tune your skills and efforts.
With determination, you will be rewarded for your efforts.

Your Career path

JWW — 2008-02-17 18:26:47

How can you find the right Career Path? I teach Careers Education and Guidance, I often to determine what young people might like to be involved with based primarily on aptitude & interest.

All too often with little or no life experience the chances of young people making a sense of the myriad of options available to them is small.
Your job constitutes a vast portion of your life, and yet it is not uncommon for our working lives to be riddled with difficulty brought about by the necessity of having to make a living.

The young people I teach have some fanciful suggestions for the careers they wish to pursue, often flighty, these ideas can change from upon week, one thing or another changes amd they react and change career choice.
This process is transparent to me it’s so good to see the students openly acknowledge they can be wrong and justify their new interests.

But what happens to this innate ability of the young to be able to admit an inaccurate course of action, whether it be a career or hobby the same applies, trying and retrying is a fundamental aspect of moving towards your ultimate goals. If something is wrong admit it, analyse it and utilise it.

You only gather real wisdom by following through with your decisions and learning from your experience in life. Without a deliberate and persistent effort to expose yourself to the various skills and vocations that may be interest to you true fulfilment may escape you.

How is it that we seem to loose this ability as we grow older, all to often we simply ‘defer gratification’ and plod with something inside us knowing we simply are not cut out for this.
My advice, is to take a good hard look at what you can offer and what truly makes you happy, after all, as days turn into weeks and the years roll by eventually you will come to regret some of the possibilities you failed to explore. If instinctually you realise there is something lacking in your working life it’s time for a change.

By giving yourself room to acknowledge mistakes you are also giving yourself space to grow and move forward the challenges you face allow you to forge your character.

Write it down

JWW — 2008-04-14 23:02:21

Recording and evidencing our lives and achievements enables us to reflect and evaluate our progress as we develop. I have taken to writing about my thoughts and feelings and regularly express myself in this why to hopefully map out a clear direction I should proceed into in the future.
There are many ways for you to keep track of your daily goings-on, from the humble diary/journal to more sophisticated electronic equipment capturing various visual and auditory information. One thing is for sure it is difficult for us to consciously think about many thoughts simultaneously.
Spilling your conscious mind out into another format enables to perceive our own ideas with a fresh analytical eye. Using the power of our imagination allows us to refine and develop our thoughts further.
Information can be classified and represented and filtered as appropriate to our situation having our thoughts recorded also allows us easily disseminate our ideas and where they can collectively progress or collapse.
As I have said having expressed an idea enables you to re-examine your thoughts perhaps even liberating your objectivity? Recording ideas provides a feedback mechanism to ourselves; we are more aware of our own thoughts and in turn more sharply focused upon them.
With the ease of access that is available from the written word or a diary, we can fuel our imaginations new ideas can be synthesised from existing ones. We can decompose seemingly complicated problems into small manageable components.
I am prone to forgetting, keys, wallet even my dog you name it, I’ve lost it. Recording provides with an aide-memoir never forget you your anniversary again? (hmmm)
If your ever feeling uneasy or anxious its possibly due to your sub conscious mind trying to let you know something our brains certainly have their limitations and can be dramatically improved with very some basic procedures. (A pen and pencil)

Do it now

JWW — 2008-04-17 23:13:36

How many times have you unnecessarily waited to do something? All of those niggling things you know you really should be doing and that you cunningly somehow manage to schedule in as “when I get around to it”.

If you\'re anything like me you will have, at some point experienced that nagging anxious feeling at the back of your mind, when your sub-conscious is telling you something is not right, in my expereince this can often be put down to procastination.

Putting things off and off and off in this way is obviously counter productive, it can set you back and leave you feeling glum. As deadlines mount and pressure to get tasks and duties completed draws in, you hit the inevitable crunch. Suddenly those things you have been putting off so skilfully seem threateningly close – you despair “how did I let myself get into this mess?!”

To some extent procrastination can be thwarted with experience (I’ve been here before) and organisation (If I actually plan this for once maybe I won’t get in such a jam next time?) ultimately however, it is your motivation and attitude that will determine you ability to be able to get things done.

Procrastination it seems to me is another one of those day to day survival skills that we employ to make the present more enjoyable, pushing some time in between yourself and the dreaded chore seems so reasonable at the time, and we can become really rather skilful at devising ingenious reasons as to why we shouldn’t be doing something. I’m tired, I’m busy (with this diversionary activity I’ve just invented), I’m not in the mood, I’m not in the right frame of mind. Funny? Absolutely not.

During these time we are moving away from a seemingly painful activity and toward one distraction or another. So whether it be getting up early, exercising or attacking that mountain of paperwork, we often choose to avoid these activities because on some level we simply don’t like them, they are boring, time-consuming or just plain painful. However it is especially at these times we forge our lives we battle on through these chalenges or enslave ourselves to tread the path of least resistance.

Iron will power and resolve isn’t always the solution either, I will get up, read six books and run twelve miles every morning, might sound like a great set of life changing goals. As you lay in bed on that first morning basking in the warmth and comfort do you want to get up?

No? then its time to go about Establishing your motivation. The crux of most things comes down t your motivation, the reason why you do or do not undertake any action, is determined by previous actions and thoughts. You won’t be surprised to here the reiteration of the importance of goals at this point, it’s goals that can keep you moving and to stay motivated. We can accept and even enjoy the actions we undertake if we have a sense of direction and purpose.

The opposite also applies, as a teacher I use the concept of chunking, I break larger activities (lessons) down into smaller manageable tasks I know the direction I wish my students to go in but we work towards our targets in a stepwise fashion.

Once you’ve set about your tasks in a more sensible manageable series of tasks it makes sense to schedule them, but not at the expensive of vital personal activities, like your health routine or spending time with your friends and family.

Try not to be overwhelmed by the complexities of life and focus your effort on getting one thing done at a time, and this will furnish you with a sense of success and will prompt you into further action.

A question, when is the time to do these things? Without a doubt the time is now, right now. Even if it’s just writing something down, taking immediate action gets you started and once your started there no stopping you, right? The key is to do it right away. If someone gives you a job, start it immediately, even if you are constrained by time and can only offer ten minutes. Applying this attitude throughout your working life will greatly improve your productivity.

As you take tasks on you will inevitably make mistakes, some small, others vast, mistakes are how we learn. If you’ve decided to tackle your workload head on and get things done. Allow yourself a gaping margin of error, you will make mistakes, use them, record them and decide how you can improve.

Don’t be slowed down by any negativity relating to your own abilities. Telling yourself you’re not up to the job will only serve to hamper your efforts. Ditch the doubts, don’t imagine you have to do everything to the highest possible standards, set realistic and attainable targets else you’ll be setting yourself up to stumble. More important, is to get yourself in the swing of things.

In fact it is important to cast away any negative association you have with the tasks or activities that await you. Change your mind set and appreciate work in which ever form it may manifest itself as a blessing, without which we would be lost. Aspire to a working ethos.

With all this mind I might be accused of being a dullard, targets, effort, ethos blah, blah where’s the good bit, when do I actually get to enjoy my life. Well I’m certainly not going to prescribe a life of martyrdom. You have to be able to unpick why you want to go through with each challenge as they come, but why not some fun have at the same time, if anything can see you through its love and laughter. Take time to appreciate the good things in life, unwind and enjoy yourself.

Posture

JWW — 2008-07-08 19:42:40

Recently I have experienced some lower back pain I have been diagnosed with Degenerative Disc Disease I intend give my spine the best care I can. To do this it’s important to think about posture. Here are some tips for when you are standing up, sitting down and walking

Sitting
• Sit down in a comfortable chair of your choice
• Align your back with the back within the chair. It’s really important that you don’t slouch or roll forward relax you muscles and shoulders
• Your arms should be at angle of 90 degrees or slightly less
• Make sure your neck, back, and heels are lined up as if we could draw a straight line through them
• Keep your feet flat
• Keep you weight evenly distributed
• stand up once in while and stretch

Standing
• Keep the weight of your body towards the front or balls of your feet
• Keep feet apart about the width of your hips or shoulders
• Your arms should be relaxed
• Keep your head positioned to the center
• Remain standing straight not to distribute your weight to one side of your body or the other
• Periodically walk and stretch your limbs

Walking
• Keep the head up and eyes looking straight ahead.
• Do not over-stretch your limbs, take comfortable strides
• Keep shoulders comfortably back
• Move your arms in a natural fashion to complement your walking

Success

JWW — 2008-07-14 22:11:08

Success is personal, it’s the one thing we strive for the thought of not having or being it can bring unhappiness and even desperation. The measures that we use to determine our own success largely effect it’s outcome. How do we define success and what is it that makes us successful?

Success (to some extent implies) taking hold of our own destinies, deciding we are the masters of our own fate and realising we are responsible for the choices we have made in life. Success depends upon us foregoing procrastination, and having the courage to lead our lives according to our set of beliefs and values respecting, trusting, and accepting those people around us.

Success relies on us identifying the aspects of our personality that hold us back and deciding to improve ourselves, so that our dignity and integrity can remain intact.

The successful know what they want, they set goals and go about achieving them in a methodical fashion, as problems are encountered along their journey the successful use these problems as a positive learning process. Successful people are able to communicate what they want and need, they are assertive not passive or aggressive and in doing so treat people with kindness and respect.

Successful people have ownership of their ideas and thoughts, they have the power to choose how to lead their lives, the successful choose their relationships wisely and spend time with those that bring mutual benefit into their lives.

Successful people know when to say “No” they realise the own constraints and limitations and don’t overfill or over complicate their lives, they recognise that saying no is a legitimate and sensible choice in many situations and fosters an atmosphere of genuine choice.

The successful have a direction and purpose, they have consciously considered the course they want to take their life and persevere until they prevail.

It’s up to each of us to follow these ideas.

Confidence

JWW — 2008-07-15 21:54:43

Have you ever noticed how certain individuals seem so undoubtedly sure of themselves? Confidence gives people the edge of success in the various areas of our lives; it demonstrates we believe in ourselves and our own abilities. It shows we are comfortable with ourselves and our capabilities.

Confidence can appear in many areas in our lives, however its effects are usually their greatest in social situations, most of us have deep rooted social needs for friendship, love and respect.

When we are confident with those around us we are able to clearly communicate our thoughts and feelings, the ability to communicate how we feel with other others is fundamental to our state of mind and self-esteem.

In order to relate to others we need our core set of values and beliefs to be transparent we must remain true to our principles even when we are tested during times of ‘peer-pressure’ for example. When what we value and believe in is clearly defined to those around us it gives them permission to be open too. This quality is sometimes referred to as congruency. Of course to do this it’s important we know ourselves and we understand our own values and beliefs.

Another factor allowing us openly communicate is empathy this is an awareness of the emotional state of those around you, being consciously tuned into the nuances of peoples emotions can allow us to better understand them and improve our relationships in turn building a mutual bond of confidence between us.

Confidence is state of mind, confidence is about our ‘Paradigm’ (Covey) or how we view the world, our interpretation of how (we think) others will receive our behaviour or our expectations. Expectation actually have a huge net impact on the outcome of most social situations, as the quote goes - whether we think we can or we can’t we are probably right, attitude counts so being prepared to be confident

Going ahead and taking control of our lives and having the courage to face our anxieties and fears gives us hope, hope although at times fragile, is extremely powerful Sometimes all we need is glimpse of who we could be to improve who we are.

Contribution

JWW — 2008-07-16 22:20:41

Once I was listening to values a parent was trying to instil into their child, it was the value of contribution, especially in contrast to their consumption. We can consider this balance in most areas of our lives.

It’s not that consumption is unhealthy, we need to consume, food, fuel, information to name but a few but many of us don’t realise we are taking too much.

Let’s take clothes as a basic (albeit clichéd) example, most of the clothes you are wearing are likely to be made by people who have far less than you (please excuse this generalisation) often working in sub-standard conditions for too many hours a day to produce our clothes at a cost we expect to pay. Some organisations such as Fair Trade seek to address this and offer such workers a better deal.

Of course this idea doesn’t just work on a global level in can work on a personal level too, adding value, Karma, the law of reciprocity, these ideas go by many names and are often a focal point within religion, it’s fundamental.

In life, we depend on one another, we have our roles to play in society. Imagine if we all decided to suddenly stop and went on strike simultaneously society would dissolve. We rely on each others contributions.

The cynical or even capitalist amongst you will be no doubt be thinking I have neglected to mention the role of money here. Is that not how we calculate the contribution we have made to society? Yes, we have estimated the value and social worth of nearly every imaginable activity on the planet but it is also true that a good deal of the time we get through life with good will, for example the doctor seeing one more patient at the end of a long shift.

Imagine if we all offered that little bit extra help to each other, all of lives are enriched. Not just because of what each of us are getting, most of us actually take pleasure in giving and being charitable. It raises our own self-esteem to help those around us without greed or expectation.

I believe contribution in this way no matter how small the deed or action has a net effect greater than we can imagine. It’s ripples reaching far through the fabric of our society, so go ahead make that extra effort, be a better person, and improve the world we live in.

Faith

JWW — 2008-07-17 21:29:46

I wanted to write a little about the concept of faith, a complicated word that conjures up many meanings: sincerity, trust, belief, religion. On the one hand we can say that faith is an absolute belief without proof. It is fair to say that most people who actively practice religion have made a leap and choose to belive in that which offer little empirical evidence.

How each of these individuals experiences faith may vary dramatically. One person may regularly interpret their experiences that relate and figure into their faith. Others may struggle to make sense of why certain things happen in their lives and how these fit their religious understanding.

I recognise that religion (or the name of) in some instances has caused unbearable suffering and that cynics describe faith as an “emotional crutch” but faith in a religious context works for some people and I believe there is a real merit to that, it gives people strength and hope in the darkest times in their life it unites (sometimes) and allows people to believe in something greater than themselves. I wouldn’t take that away from anybody.

Faith exists in each of our lives and one of the cornerstones of our relationships, I do know that we need faith alongside trust, we have to make certain assumptions in life, that our friends, family and loved one will to an extent, behave in a civil and predictable manor without faith on this level social bonds begin decay, would you want a friendship without it?

Marriage

JWW — 2008-07-18 19:39:52

Well as I guess some of you will know I’m getting hitched, Kelly and I are very happy together and the Marriage draws near at 3:00 (GMT) on the 27th of July 2008 I hope you’ll send me your best wishes. Marriage is a time honoured tradition, we are getting married with a religious ceremony through the church and whilst I don’t consider myself to be Christian I do believe in the love, promise and commitment that marriage has to offer.

I’m hoping it will be a fantastic day and one that we’ll remember for many years to come. I’ll post pictures somewhere on the site to give you an idea of how things went. I’d also be interested in hearing any one else’s point of view about marriage, do you think it’s still valid in today’s society? Do you think the tradition as been over-hyped and marketed? What are the reasons to be married?

I’d also love anyone to drop me a line who have been married for a long time, enduring romance spanning decades in really encouraging, and the notion that people can grow and develop as the years go by is appealing too.

I’d be curios to hear about ceremonies of others faiths and religions too if anyone has any pearls of wisdom be sure to send them my way. I’ve promised myself some time away from the well everything to spend with Kelly after we are married; we are going to visit Scotland so I won’t be available during that time.

James

7 tips to transform your life from Henry Ford

JWW — 2008-07-20 21:23:33

Henry Ford, born July 30, 1863, was the first of William and Mary Ford\'s six children. At an early age, he showed an interest in mechanical things.
In 1879, sixteen-year-old Ford left home for the nearby city of Detroit to work as an apprentice machinist.

Ford realises his dream of producing an automobile that was reasonably priced, reliable, and efficient with the introduction of the Model T in 1908. This vehicle initiated a new era in personal transportation. It was easy to operate, maintain, and handle on rough roads, immediately becoming a huge success.

Below are 7 quotes from Ford helping us get an insight into the great man mans mindset.

1) Be direct but have a sense of humour in the process.
“Any colour - so long as it\'s black.”

Most of will have heard this quote, when the first affordable automobiles were being produced and the public queried the availability of colour. In order to deliver, Ford produced them in one colour only, black. He got his point across, but did so in a humorous way. Don’t underestimate the importance of humour in your day-to-day dealings.

2) Preparation is key
“Before everything else, getting ready is the secret of success.”

Most of you will have read of the importance of setting goals and tasks to move your life in the direction you would wish. If you’re failing to plan - you’re planning to fail.

3) Learning from your mistakes
“Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently.”

Don’t be caught out beating yourself up for past mistakes, lets face it we all make them. We can’t learn without them, being prepared to learn from our failings is one of the most important lessons we can make.

4)Communication & relationships

“If there is any one secret of success, it lies in the ability to get the other person\'s point of view and see things from that person\'s angle as well as from your own.”

Autonomy and independence are important skills, but to be the best you can be we need to learn form those around us. Each of us has our own unique set of skills and abilities, whether it be work, friendship or love effectively communicating is pivotal to our success, learn to listen and understand others.

5) Having the right mental attitude
“If you think you can do a thing or think you can\'t do a thing, you\'re right.”

Having belief in yourself and abilities is the first hurdle we need to overcome to reach our goals. Having the right levels positivity and optimism gives us the momentum we need to progress.

6) The purpose of Money
“The highest use of capital is not to make more money, but to make money do more for the betterment of life.”

Understanding that money should be put to good use and is not an end in itself, another important lesson from our man Ford

7)Setting your sights high
“There is no man living that can not do more than he thinks he can”

Have you ever asked yourself what you are capable of? Do you really know what you could achieve if you put your mind to it? Henry Ford did.

3 ideas from the late great Sir Isaac Newton

JWW — 2008-07-21 22:49:10

Isaac Newton was born on 4 January 1643, he went to Cambridge University where he became interested in mathematics, physics and astronomy

Newton conducted a series of experiments on the composition of light, discovering that white light is composed of the same system of colours that can be seen in a rainbow.

In 1687, Newton published his single greatest work,. Stating a universal force, gravity, can be applied to all objects in all parts of the universe.

It is said that Newton was a difficult man, prone to depression and often involved in bitter arguments with other scientists lets hear 3 of his thoughts on life:

Quality over quantity
“It is the weight, not numbers of experiments that is to be regarded.”

Our lives are richer for choosing or doing those things we know give us the right results. It is quality rather than quantity that matters this counts for every aspect of our lives. Would you rather have 20 mediocre relationships or be with the love of your life. Own 20 failing business or one successful one?

Build on the achievements of others
“If I saw further than other men, it was because I stood on the shoulders of giants.”

We’re bound not to get very far in life in we don’t capitalise on the huge adavancents and insights that others have made before us. Learn from your ancestors & contemporises, embrace those teachings that are relevant, from here you may originate and synthesise new ideas.

Think outside of the box
“No great discovery was ever made without a bold guess”

Ditch your routine thought processes and add some creativity. identify the assumptions you are making and challenge them. This is a great way to deal with problems, don’t take anything for granted be bold and challenge the accepted.

5 ideas from the father of Psychotherapy Carl Rogers

JWW — 2008-07-22 23:30:47

Carl Rogers was born January 8, 1902 Rogers was interested in the development of our species and others he posed questions such as, why do we want air, water and food? Why, do we seek to discover new medicines, invent new power sources, or create new works of art? “Because it is in our nature as living things to do the very best we can! “

Rogers explains that organisms know intrinsically what they need. Evolution has provided us with our senses, the tastes, the discriminations we need: When we hunger, we find food -- not just any food, but food that tastes good. Food that tastes bad is likely to be spoiled, rotten, unhealthy. So tastes are millions of years of evolutionary programming

Rogers belived we have other inbuilt needs and used the term “positive regard” to describe love, affection, attention, nurturance etc. He noted we value positive self-regard, that is, self-esteem, self-worth, a positive self-image. Without this self-regard, we fail to reach our potential.

5 Quotes from Rogers Follow:

1) Let others help themselves and expect the same from them

“In my early professionals years I was asking the question: How can I treat, or cure, or change this person? Now I would phrase the question in this way: How can I provide a relationship which this person may use for his own personal growth?”

We can’t force development on other people, despite thinking we know best. Growths really happens from the inside out. We can certainly inspire and motivate, but real change can only comes about if we have willingness to embrace this transformation.

2)Know yourself, accept yourself from here you can grow.

“The curious paradox is that when I accept myself just as I am, then I can change.”

When we begin to explore the dimensions of our own personalities, we inevitably come across aspects of ourselves we like and other areas we could further develop. It is important however, that we acknowledge and accept ourselves to move forward and progress.

3)Personal development is ongoing

“The good life is a process, not a state of being. It is a direction not a destination.”

Growth and development by definition require change; its an undertaking which is never done, as we improve so do our perspectives and horizons broaden, we strive to go further and do more it is this ongoing process that’s adds quality to our lives.

4)Find positivity in people
“When I look at the world I'm pessimistic, but when I look at people I am optimistic.”

The news is replete with examples of death, war, plague, pestilence and atrocities. Considering such matters on a global level can give a false impression of humanity, When you look for the good in people it is there in abundance.

5)Stick with the facts
“The facts are always friendly, every bit of evidence one can acquire, in any area, leads one that much closer to what is true.”

We all live within our own subjective interpretations of this world improving your understanding and gathering more information in given topic can only serve to strengthen your position.

12 quotes from the master of motivation Zig Ziglar.

JWW — 2008-08-12 23:52:11

Mr Ziglar is a real source of inspiration to many including myself born Ziglar teaches personal development with a strong ethical emphasis born in 1926 he’s still going strong. Let’s hear some of his pearls of wisdom.

1) “A goal properly set is halfway reached. “ – As you can gather Zig is a big advocate of setting goals, giving us clarity and direction in life.

2) “A lot of people quit looking for work as soon as they find a job. “ works is an ongoing process, as is personal development, become lazy at your own peril!

3) “Building a better you is the first step to building a better America.” Obviously as much is true as of any other country, Here I believe Zig is asking us to look at the bigger picture as each of us as individuals has our role to play in society.

4) “Every choice you make has an end result. “ Simple cause and effect here each of our actions or inactions affect who be become and what we do, make the right choice.

5) “Every obnoxious act is a cry for help.” It may be for attention, or to prove just how bad they really are often peoples bad behaviour springs from an individuals weakness, could you be the one to help them?

6) “Expect the best. Prepare for the worst. Capitalize on what comes.” Enough said

7) “Failure is a detour, not a dead-end street.” Learn from your mistakes, in fact mistakes are a part of learning don’t dwell on them, move on.

8)“I believe that being successful means having a balance of success stories across the many areas of your life. You can't truly be considered successful in your business life if your home life is in shambles.” Balance is important in life why not try mapping your own success with the life map tool in Personal Evolution.

9) “If God would have wanted us to live in a permissive society He would have given us Ten Suggestions and not Ten Commandments.” Yes, Zig is deeply religious and firmly recommends both integrity and discipline.

10) “If you go looking for a friend, you're going to find they're very scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you'll find them everywhere.” Don’t be divisive or see people as a resource. Be empathic and receptive to the needs of others and reap the rewards.

11) “If you don't see yourself as a winner, then you cannot perform as a winner.” Having belief is all important, don’t let anyone including yourself doubt what you are capable of.

12) “If you can dream it, then you can achieve it. You will get all you want in life if you help enough other people get what they want. “ The Ziglar classic, follow your dreams, and set about adding value to this world what can you do help improve the lives of others around you?