pimp to the utmost

brussels sprouts: non-blech version

taeryn — Fri, 28 Oct 2011 16:35:00 -0400

I didn't grow up eating brussels sprouts, so I never developed the passionate dislike for them that it seems most people possess. In fact, I've never eaten brussels prepared any other way than stir-fried, so personally I love them. And frankly, I can't imagine anyone not liking them when prepared like this.

The measurements are not really important, everything should very much be "to taste". Personally I'm a big fan of pepper, so I tend to use a lot. You can omit virtually anything and add in whatever you want, but it wouldn't really be a brussels sprouts recipe if you took them out, so we'll say that's a required ingredient.

1/2 lb fresh Brussels sprouts (I have no idea how frozen would fare, so buy fresh and if possible, buy local too because they'll taste awesome)
1/2 cup Mushrooms
5 slices thick Bacon
2-3 small fresh Cayenne Peppers (There were some fresh-from-the-garden ones available to me today, otherwise I probably would not have bothered)
2 eggs (very optional, see below)
Sesame oil
Soy Sauce
Black Pepper

Proceed to wash and then chop the veg and bacon up. It tends to work best if you either half or quarter the brussels, use your discretion if they are tiny or enormous. Basically bite-size is good for everything, except the cayenne peppers which I minced. When you're chopping up the brussels, you'll lose some of the outer leaves, probably. Don't worry about them.

Get a frypan or wok hotted up on the stove and chuck the bacon and some sesame oil in. You don't need a lot of oil because there will be plenty of bacon grease. The sesame is just for flavoring.

Fry the bacon for a few minutes, adding soy sauce if you like. Then toss the veggies in and add some pepper. Keep stir-frying the whole mess, adding pepper or soy sauce (or sesame oil) as you feel it's needed. It's always good to taste a little as you go. It's done when the sprouts are softened (but still crisp).

Optional: I listed eggs in the recipe, but I only really add them because it's a nice protein injection. Usually I'll just crack a couple into the pan a few minutes before I'm ready to transfer the contents to a bowl. The eggs soak up the bacon grease, soy sauce and such really nicely.

And there you have it. A way to make brussels sprouts taste damn amazing. Of course, bacon always helps.

awesomesauce meatloaf

pimpmasta — Sun, 21 Aug 2011 17:28:00 -0400

While I'm on the whole30, I've been trying to stick with grass fed pastured beef. Grass fed steaks are rather expensive, so I've been eating a good deal of ground beef. Try as you like to dress up a burger, eventually it gets a bit boring.

So I decided to make some meatloaf.

Almost every single meatloaf recipe I've seen involves a bunch of sugar and a bunch of breadcrumbs, oats, etc. in addition to meat. I'm not sure what the fetish for adding random filler is... perhaps its a carryover from the Great Depression when filler was used with a bit of ground beef to make the meat go farther?

After plenty of searching, I finally found this recipe: Bacon Buffalo Meatloaf. No filler, no sugar. Just delicious savory meat. And it has bacon.

After making it a couple times, I tweaked it a bit to be even more complex and delicious:

Ingredients

Sauce:

1/2 can tomato paste
1/2 teaspoon garlic salt
1/4 teaspoon garlic powder (or a couple cloves diced)
1/4 teaspoon onion powder
1/2 green bell pepper finely diced

Loaf:

1 lb ground meat. Beef, buffalo, etc.
1/2 green bell pepper finely diced
1/2 red bell pepper finely diced
1/2 onion finely diced (red, white, yellow, doesn't really matter)
1 egg
1/2 can of tomato paste
4 slices of uncooked bacon, chopped
1 teaspoon garlic salt
1/2 teaspoon garlic powder (or a couple cloves diced)
1/4 teaspoon onion powder
1 teaspoon salt
1/2 teaspoon crushed red pepper

This recipe is very forgiving with changes and substitutions. Feel free to use all the same color bell peppers, chop them larger or smaller, etc. You can leave out the bacon, or add more spices, or whatever. Once you get the meatloaf base down, you can tweak it to your heart's desire.

Procedure

Preheat oven to 375 degrees

Sauce:

Mix all ingredients together in a small bowl, adding water until it reaches the consistency of ketchup

Loaf:

Mix all ingredients together in a big mixing bowl. I just put everything in there, then squidge it around with my hands, but you can probably use a spoon if you don't want to get your hands dirty.
Form into "loaves" on a pan.
Paint half of the sauce on top of the loaves (retain some for later).
Bake for 45-60 minutes
Paint the rest of the sauce on top of loves and serve.

I paired the the meatloaf with some oven roasted veggies.

Nomnomnom.

Cigar Monday: Obsidian

taeryn — Sun, 14 Aug 2011 00:15:00 -0400

Basic Info: Brazilian ligero wrapper, criollo binder, blend of Nicaraguan and Dominican fillers.
Price: ~$4
Size: Double Perfecto (6" x 60)
Strength: This is a pretty strong cigar.
Construction: I have smoked 3 of these now, no severe issues with draw or burn, but it's crafted about how you would expect a circa $4 stick to be. On one of the cigars, the wrapper cracked and peeled a little, but it was still very smokeable.
Impression:
This cigar caught my eye initially due to the highly uncommon ligero wrapper. I have smoked a decent number of cigars with ligero filler, and I'm a big fan of the strength and flavor it impart. As I understand, this brand is a relative newcomer, but I was intrigued by the presentation and composition. I ordered a 5-pack from an online retailer, and was looking forward to trying it out.
The cold draw is surprisingly simple for a cigar with this much packed into it. There is a grassy taste, with some sour fermentation which I imagine is coming from that ligero wrapper. The cigar looks somewhat veiny, but the wrapper showed no blemishes or signs of poor quality.
Initial light-up is met with a rich nutty flavor, and I immediately thought of the CAO Brazilia (a very fine smoke in it's own right). The flavor palate expands to encompass generic wood and earth notes, with a slight metallic hint on the back of the tongue.
Overall this is a very rich and smooth smoke... It does feature some strong tannins, but they aren't harsh or unpleasant. There is some sweetness as well, but not in a sugary way.
The double perfecto is a figurado, with a hefty bulge in the middle, and tapers at each end. Unsurprisingly, smoke volume and strength escalate through the middle third, and that is where this cigar is most enjoyable. I got some bitter nuances such as cocoa or espresso.
Given the tobaccos used, it's little wonder that this cigar is really quite strong. I am no stranger to meatier, full-bodied smokes, but I would have to say this is one of the stronger ones I have had. Not for the faint-hearted.
I have had the luxury of smoking a lot of really great cigars recently, so I am somewhat reluctant to rate the Obsidian as highly as I maybe should. However, it is really an excellent stick that fans of stronger cigars should appreciate. I will probably be picking up a few more in the future.
Rating: 4/5 - Solid, reliable, and priced quite attractively.

Cigar Monday (well, Tuesday anyway): Morro Castle

taeryn — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 21:59:00 -0400

Construction: Nicaraguan... Ecuadorian Sumatra wrapper, filler and binder are a blend of Nicaraguan and Honduran.
Price: ~$5
Size: Robusto (4.7" x 52)
Draw: Really great draw, not too loose but pulled plenty of smoke through.
Strength: Somewhere about middle of the spectrum. Overall fairly mild, but full-flavored with a subtle strength which built well through the final third
Burn: Required a little bit of attention but no real problems
Impression:
With the caveat that I have smoked just one of these so far (and it's hard to really get to know a cigar until you've had it a few times and can start to notice if it changes much from one stick to another), I am going to give it a great big stamp of approval. From start to finish I was simply enthralled, it had so much complexity and flavor, but overall was such an amazingly sophisticated smoke. The term "mild" often times carries negative connotations, giving the impression the cigar doesn't do a whole lot on your palate... well this might be an exception. It's deceptively smooth, and extremely delicious.

Cold draw is very grassy, it put the idea of a pasture or meadow in my mind. I got a little bit of fruit as well, perhaps something like a blueberry, but it was very slight. It had a strong organic feel to it - just so earthy and rich. Initial light-up was very nice... leather right off the bat, some rich wood like mahogany, toasty notes as well.

This cigar reminded me a lot of drinking a high-end whisky or cognac - there was so much depth in the finish. Right from the start, it had this unique flavor on the finish that I spent the entire cigar trying to put my finger on, without any luck. I'm seriously stumped as to what I was tasting. There is definitely a ton of leather and wood, but whatever that creamy little kick at the end of the finish is, I can't figure it out. Definitely need to smoke a few more to investigate further.

Overall it gives a very strong impression of an aged cigar. The flavor is exceedingly rich and smooth, and the smell of it is simply amazing. With the amount of complexity it has, it almost feels rather muted. You taste a lot of different things, without any one flavor standing out strongly... The idea of an old piece of furniture presents itself, that rich wood and leather are probably the most notable nuances.

The robusto is a rather small cigar, at only 4.7" inches long, but it packs a pretty hefty punch. That could just be because the volume of smoke I got out of this stogie was fantastic... thick clouds of it from start to finish. Although it didn't burn particularly hot, it picked up some strong peppery spice towards the end that just about stayed in the zone of "pleasant", without straying into "harsh". It maintains the leather throughout, and stays beautifully smooth.

This is an extremely approachable cigar because of the aforementioned smoothness. It's not going to turn you green if you don't smoke a lot, but there is so much flavor and complexity that I can't really say it's mild.

It was a sublime evening for a smoke, which always exaggerates how good a cigar actually was... and I'm hesitant to give a perfect 5 rating because I try to reserve that for the best of the best. However, on this evidence, this cigar might be fully deserving. I will definitely be picking a few more of these up, and wouldn't hesitate to recommend you do the same.
Rating: 4.5/5 - Like a boss.

savory roasted veggies and fish

pimpmasta — Tue, 09 Aug 2011 08:55:00 -0400

I've recently started the whole30 challenge, a 30 day challenge to eat nothing but meat and veggies. There's more, but that's the main thrust of it -- if you're interested, check the link for more.

Oven roasted veggies and meat has become one of my main staples, because it is extremely delicious while also dead simple to prep and cook. A few minutes for prep, toss 'em in the oven for 20 minutes, and you've got a plate of tastyness awaiting you.

You can use most non-leafy veggies for this -- just use your imagination. I've used asparagus, brussels sprouts, cauliflower, broccoli, red peppers, onions, etc. etc. In this case, I used cauliflower, brussels sprouts, and a bit of red pepper and onion.

Use your imagination in selecting spices. Veggies and fish are a great vehicle for testing new spice mixes to see what works.

Procedure:

Grab some large pans or cookie sheets
If you're not into the cleaning thing, line the pans with aluminum foil
Lightly coat with olive oil, or your cooking fat of choice
Start the oven preheating to 450°

Veggies Procedure:

Chop the veggies into medium sized pieces
Put chopped veggies on the pans
Lightly drizzle with oil

Fish Procedure:

Wash and clean fish. I used salmon, but you can use pretty much any fish.
Place it on a pan
Lightly drizzle and rub with oil

Spice Procedure:

Choose your spices. I used salt, basil, oregano, and garlic. You can use different spices for the fish and veggies, or even different spices amongst the veggies.
Sprinkle generously over the veggies and fish.

All done. You probably actually want to go heavier on the spices than I did -- caking them up with spices can make for very savory and crispy veg. Like I said, experiment. :-D.

Pop the veggies and fish into the oven. Veggies will probably take 20-30 minutes, depending on how large or small you chopped them. Fish will probably take 10-20 minutes, depending on thickness. After 15 minutes or so, an amazing aroma will start wafting through your kitchen. Check the oven every 5-10 minutes after that to see if it's done. The veggies should be nice and crispy, the fish flaky and opaque. Here's an article on how to tell if fish is done.

Time to dig in. Nomnomnom.

Cigar Monday: Cu-Avana "Punisher"

taeryn — Mon, 01 Aug 2011 16:21:00 -0400

I apologize for the lack of a picture, I smoked this cigar without thinking of snapping a pic, and I couldn't find anything suitable on google image search without potentially breaking some copyrights. Here's a link to image search if you want to take a gander at what this beast looks like: clickify

Construction: I don't actually know... Apparently, it's a secret. This is a Nicaraguan cigar, and I am dead sure it's packed with ligero.
Price: $8-10
Size: Torpedo (6" x 52)
Draw: No complaints here, well constructed
Strength: Oh baby...
Burn: Nice and even, and very slow
Impression: Let me start by saying that this isn't a cigar I would normally be drawn to. It seems rather gimmicky, to be honest. It's a tad on the pricey side, and the endless warnings of spice, strength and "dear god it burns" are somewhat off-putting. So it wasn't by my own choice that I ended up smoking one of these bad boys - rather, a buddy bought a box and insisted I try it. Now, it does have a few things going for it... Cu-Avana is potentially my greatest personal discovery of this year, simply because of the Intenso (check out my review of that cigar if you wonder what I think of it). Cu-Avana could make virtually anything they wanted and I would be intrigued. Also, it's a Nicaraguan, which I am somewhat a big fan of. So I steeled myself for the experience, and bunkered down to smoke this - by all accounts - punishing cigar. What I was completely unprepared for, was just what they meant by spice. We're not talking about a lingering peppery-ness on the finish, or a tingle on your tongue as you pull in a big drag of smoke... No, we're talking about straight up lip-burning molten lava spice - think thai spicy beef kaprow and what your lips feel like after chowing down on that. The smoke itself I didn't find particularly spicy at all, but you can cold draw this stick and feel like you've been frenching a habanero. I swear they must soak these things in a hot sauce you might find at one of those novelty shops, with a name like "Brimstone and the Tears of the Damned". To be perfectly frank, I was not a huge fan of this. It was an experience, to be sure, but I like to actually taste my cigars... I'd say that's like 90% of the reason I smoke them. Fortunately, the spice died down after a few minutes, and allowed me to start picking out little nuances in the flavor profile. And I must say, this is one hell of a tasty smoke. It's very rich and vibrant, I expected leather and wood, and I got it. There was a subtle nuttiness, and maybe something like molasses. In fact, this tasted increasingly similar to the Intenso. Surprisingly, I found the Intenso to be a stronger smoke, overall. It's really that spice that defines this cigar. Obvious warning: not a cigar for people who hate spice. It's a quality cigar, but I think I'll be sticking to something less.... punishing.
Rating: 3.5/5 - Not too shabby.

Cigar Monday: Ave Maria

taeryn — Mon, 18 Apr 2011 14:39:00 -0400

Construction: Ecuador habano wrapper, filler and binder Nicaraguan (Esteli)
Price: $6+
Size: Knight Templar (6" x 48)
Draw: Perfect
Strength: This is a fairly mild smoke (but don't let that dissuade you)
Burn: Even, didn't require any attention
Impression: I didn't know too much about this cigar before buying a box. That could have been an extremely unfortunate mistake, but I had seen some glowing reviews, and the box was on sale, so I figured I'd take a punt. Fortunately, it proved to be not only a bold strategy, but it also paid off. The first thing I noticed when I pulled one of these cigars out of the protective cellophane, is just how strikingly beautiful the stick is. Yes, the band is a big talking point, but the wrapper was nearly flawless. Beautifully smooth and textured, but with a few veins here and there to let you know it had some character. The cold draw was pretty good, some nice woody notes and perhaps a hint of spice coming through, but more satisfactory to me was the fact there was no tightness. I have smoked a fair number of poorly made cigars recently, the craftsmanship that went into this one was immediately apparent. Initial light-up was extremely pleasant. The cigar lit easily, burned remarkably well, and the flavor palate picked up some oak, nuts and some coffee-like nuances in addition to what I had tasted in the cold draw. Mouthfeel was light with little grittiness or tannic "chompiness", giving you impression of a mild smoke. However there was a subtle strength that I only noticed when I put the cigar down and realized I was slightly buzzed. The burn and draw stayed perfect for the duration of this smoke, something like 45-50 minutes. Interestingly, I didn't notice a lot of change in the flavor other than perhaps the strength increasing towards the nub. Overall it was extremely balanced on the palate, and that I think is what makes this cigar so enjoyable. I've now smoked 4 in the past few days, and each has been perfect (or near perfect) in draw, burn and flavor. It's one I could seriously recommend to just about anyone, because it's suitably mild for a beginner, but holds plenty of flavor and interest for someone who wants a bit more from their cigar. I highly enjoyed this cigar, and will have no trouble blitzing through the rest of the box.
Rating: 5/5 - Highly recommended.

seared tuna with sesame

pimpmasta — Mon, 04 Apr 2011 20:02:00 -0400

Since I had a good bit of tuna left from yesterday's primal sushi experiment, I figured I'd put it to good use. I've never made this before, but it turns out that seared tuna is dead simple to make.

First, whip up a little sauce. I used:

4 parts soy sauce
2 parts sesame oil
1 part mirin (rice wine)
a pinch of garlic

You can also add honey or rice vinegar if you like.

Cover the tuna with the sauce. Shake out a good deal of sesame seeds on a plate. Roll the tuna in the sesame seeds.

Finally, it's time to cook this up. Throw a frying pan on the stove on high heat (cast iron is best if you've got it, but other pans will work). You want it good and hot. Water should pop and dance around the pan if you sprinkle in a droplet.

Once the pan is hot, put in a little olive oil. Gently place the tuna in the pan. Sear it on each side for 30 seconds. Don't go over 30 seconds or you'll start to burn the sesame seeds.

You can use either the leftover sauce or soy sauce and wasabi for dipping. Or make up your own sauce. A creamy ginger sauce sounds tasty.

Slice it up and you're ready to eat. NOM!

Cigar Monday: Cu-Avana "Intenso"

taeryn — Mon, 04 Apr 2011 10:02:00 -0400

Construction: Nicaraguan corojo wrapper, filler is 100% ligero from Peru and Nicaragua.
Price: $5
Size: Torpedo 6" x 54
Draw: Satisfactory
Strength: Towards the heavier end of the spectrum. Probably not a great choice for a cigar initiate.
Burn: Also satisfactory. Quality in general was top-notch, a well-made stick.
Impression: I was unfamiliar with Cu-Avana when this cigar arrived in a sampler pack with a variety of other crap. I did not really bother researching the "Intenso" before I smoked it, so I didn't know what to expect, but boy did this turn out to be an exceptional smoke. The initial light-up was immediately excellent, a lot of earth and musty leather in the flavors. As I noted, the cigar had a good draw, and burned well, so this was a very auspicious beginning. So, after smoking it, I went and did some research, because this cigar blew my mind. It's not often I will say that about a smoke, but in this case I enjoyed the cigar from start to finish and the way it developed through the middle third down to the nub was outstanding. Turns out, the "Intenso" is packed full of ligero. For those who don't know, ligero tobacco tends to be much richer in flavor, but also higher in nicotine concentration. Using a bit of ligero in your blend is not uncommon, but using 100% for your filler and binder... well, that's a bold strategy, Cotton. The result is a cigar with the deepest of flavor profiles, and the strength to make you dizzy as crap about halfway through. This is not something I would recommend to someone new to cigars, but if you're the sort that can handle an extremely full-bodied cigar... it does not get a whole lot better than this one. The price point is just the gravy on top, in my opinion this outperforms most cigars which run double or triple the cost. With the caveat that this is no newbie's smoke, I cannot recommend this cigar highly enough. Try it out.
Rating: 5/5 - Winner

Primal sushi

pimpmasta — Sun, 03 Apr 2011 20:13:00 -0400

Ever since our resident sushi expert posted the step by step norimaki sushi guide, I've been wanting to try my hand at making some sushi. Since I'm living primally (for the most part LOL), I figured I'd try replacing the rice with cauliflower. It ended up turning out pretty well. I forgot the rice vinegar, so it was just plain cauliflower. I snagged a couple slabs of sushi grade tuna and salmon from Grand Mart and got to work.

First, chunk up the cauliflower, put it on a pan and roast it.

Next, pop the cauliflower in a food processor and pulse it a bit until it ends up nice and fine.

Slice your veggies up nice and thin. I used cucumber and avacado. You'll end up with something like this.

Put it all together.

Roll it up.

Yum!

As this was my first time making sushi, it ended up a bit sloppy. But it tasted damn good!

For more info on how to put together and roll sushi, check out Taeryn's step by step norimaki sushi guide.