I love you so much, you have no clue
Nothing else matters as much as you

I have no grand dreams that you’ll take care of me
When I am old, frail and can barely see

What I do pray and hope for every moment of everyday
Is that you’ll be happy, loving and choose the right way

I’d like for you to be a fine man, sincere and honest too
Your courage, kindness and respect should shine through

Life is too short and I want you to make each moment count
And for that you don’t need a big fat bank account

Family, true friends, your values and the lives you touch
Focus on those for the rest don’t matter half as much

You owe me nothing and this to you I often repeat
Though I’d give my life for you in a single heartbeat

Happy Birthday, my one and only darling son
In my eyes you are always number one!

FYI: Hosted site is acting up lately, so you maybe receiving multipl/missed updates via subscriptions… fix promised soon!

I was listening to the news a couple of days back about a rally in Johannesburg to protest an incident where a woman in a mini skirt was stripped, paraded naked and sexually assaulted while over a 100 onlookers jeered and laughed. It was sickening to listen to the report and I shuddered, thinking about the trauma the woman must have undergone.

The next update was on the 2011 Vancouver Stanley Cup riots where a group of people decided to commit mayhem because the Vancouver Canucks lost the ice hockey finals to the Boston Bruins. At least 140 people were injured during this riot, several police officers included. Cars and police trucks were burnt down, and the mob was out of control.

Listening to these reports, one cannot help but wonder at the intense violence we carry within our souls, and how easily we succumb to it when provoked. Not to mention the fact that I seriously questioned my sanity in tuning in to the news channels every day!

Both these inhuman acts were clearly a manifestation of collective inner negativity.

Transformation has to come from the inside, for the outer world to change. That is why Nichiren always urged his disciples to retain control of their mind. Yet, many of us go through life trying to change everything and everyone else so we can be at peace, experience joy and feel blissful, unwilling to make the efforts needed to be patient, calmer and appreciative human beings ourselves.

Let’s stop and think here for a moment – if we have limited authority over ourselves how feeble is our influence over another?!

I was counting my blessings this morning at my good fortune in encountering several amazing human beings who have contributed tremendously to my life. In the process of reflecting and offering gratitude, I decided to pen down what makes them so special and here is what I came up with.

Primarily, they make me feel extremely good about myself. Being around them makes me happy, positive and appreciated and I look forward to opportunities to be in their orbit time and again.

There are ocassions when they have helped me transform from being pessimistic to hopeful and ready to battle in the space of a single conversation. In short, they make me feel like a winner.

Unspoken, but the clear message I receive is, “I am always here for you. It’s okay not to contact me when things are going well, but please do call me if you are feeling unhappy.”

They make me feel free for they give me permission to be myself; I don’t feel judged or criticized, and that is addictive.

Man, woman, child or teenager – don’t we all look forward to being around such people? However, recognizing how we like to be treated is not enough. Now, we need to keep this cycle of making others feel appreciated, unconditionally accepted and free going. Join me please?

Love is…
Wanting to hold on a telephone line endlessly
Even when you know not what to say
Because it is impossible to let go of her yet

Love is…
When you feel hot and insist you are cold
So you can switch off the air-conditioning
Because she is shivering but won’t ask

Love is…
Not always being in the same physical space
Yet tuning in emotionally with consistent frequency
Feeling close irrespective of the miles in between

Love is…
Investing so much of oneself in the relationship
That every prayer you utter for her, small or big
Just cannot be ignored by the Universe

Love is…
The unspoken vibes between you two
Such that you know precisely when she
Needs some space or could do with a hug

Love is…
Following her car all the way home
Though you have to go in the opposite direction
So you can make sure she locks the door behind herself

Love is…
That deep desire to forgive
Though you have been intensely wronged
Once, twice and many times over

Love is…
Putting all your dreams on hold while she fulfills hers
And the joy is as much or more than it would be
If you were having your wishes fulfilled

Love is…
Fierce and real when you watch her wave goodbye
Not stopping her as she goes though it hurts
For you so desperately want to see her fly high

Love is…
Holding her hand as she sits down to pray
Staying still by her side, letting her focus
Though you’d rather be doing some other exciting stuff

‘I love you’ is a daily expression we should greet ourselves with. A number of people would say that such an expression is self centred, however, I call it self-love.

While some may consider an attitude where we honour and cherish ourselves above all else selfish, I look at it differently. Practising self-love ensures that we nurture, protect and appreciate ourselves in all possible ways. We take care of our health and appearance, make sure we are at peace, and interact with good like-minded people who are respectful. We take responsibility for our happiness, personal growth and spiritual expansion without looking for someone else to come along and change our lives. Our joy then overflows contagiously and fills up our homes, our work places and everywhere else we go.

On the other hand, if a person lacks self-love, they don’t worry about themselves as much. It doesn’t matter then if the pounds pack on, the cigarettes harm their lungs and the anger causes heartburn. As much as they abuse their own bodies and inner selves, they affect others around them adversely too, even though that may not be their intention.

So, let’s all be a little self-centred. We’ll do the whole world a great service.

Thirteen years back when Buddhism found me, I was a bundle of emotional stress, physical discomfort and material goals. As I prayed for all my relationship, financial and career related concerns I began to evolve little by little in the true spirit of the Buddhist philosophy that I was practicing which emphasizes the fact that earthly desires can lead us to enlightenment. This evolution process got accelerated once we moved to Canada in February of 2006. When one lands in a country where you know not a single soul and have just enough money to survive for 60 days, there is no choice but to grow, learn and become self reliant in every aspect.

Perceiving no other alternative to transform my situation, I turned to Buddhism for courage, patience and perseverance, dedicating more time and effort to it than ever before. Every worthwhile desire was eventually fulfilled, and many unasked for wishes were granted too. As I resolved relationship issues that were haunting me for years, made a successful career, a beautiful home, enjoyed an amazingly supportive family, healthy parents and wonderful friends, something far more bigger and beautiful was happening within me as I chased after all that was outside of me.

Today I truly understand what the above passage means about purifying ourselves without giving up on our daily desires and everyday struggles with the constantly changing realities of life. Life is a necklace of multi-coloured pearls with a solitaire diamond as its center piece. The experiences of my life are the pearls that I kept adding through the past years while unconsciously ignoring that solitaire diamond that I should have been focussing on. Despite my ignorance though, that diamond was getting enhanced surrounded by the pink, blue, violet and white pearls.

That infinitely precious solitaire is of course my innermost enlightened self which Buddhism is training me to purify and beautify every morning and evening as I sit in front of my Buddhist altar. Through these glorious years of practising Buddhism, I have reached the conclusions that:

o My life is eternal and death is but a mere flash in its comparison. The one and only aspect that I will carry from one life to the next after resting in the lap of death is my diamond solitaire – not the colourful pearls of physical form, my home or my job.

o Trials, tribulations, hurt and despair are but a means to strengthen and enable me to fulfill my life’s purpose of leaving this planet a better place. That is the sole purpose of existence and everything else is a path leading to that objective.

As Nichiren Daishonin says, though worldly troubles may arise, never let them disturb you. No one can avoid problems, not even sages or worthies. His advice has not been empty and meaningless, for he has provided a means through Buddhism to assist us in mastering our mind to the point that we can keep our solitaire polished such that it brightens up not only our own lives, but the life of every person who encounters its glitter even from thousand miles away.

For a few days life may seem like fun and dance
When we find that new love and crazy romance
Until the vicious vicissitudes of everyday life
Suck it away soon bringing some grief and strife

New people come into our lives and we rejoice
While others go way without giving us a choice
We experience pain, loss and separation
Together with rapture, victory and exhilaration

Often we spend our time worrying endlessly
About work, children and our financial destiny
Half of our fears remain a figment of our imagination
The rest we learn to accept with quiet resignation

Something is wrong here, don’t you think so too?
This isn’t what the Universe wants for me and you
Infact, she sent us here to spread joy, love and sunshine
Following in the footprint of the Celestial Divine

Born as a joyful Buddha, at peace and asking for naught
But this simple skill all of us now need to be taught
I endeavoured to learn through chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo
Slowly but surely life is regaining its immense golden glow

With each and every year that has passed me by
And I experienced sadness, fear, love and joy
The conclusion has dawned on me so clearly
It is deep within that one should focus sincerely

For only the soul exists for eternity
We need to get this important reality
Money, success and even life is a mere flash
Only the soul survives it all and needs sparkle and polish

In continuation from the last blog, the inner valleys and peaks we dwell in are not limited to the faith we practice. Most of us combat it in every facet of life – work, marriage, love, relationships and creativity. Clearly, this is the process of our evolution. While understanding and acknowledging this aspect allows us to achieve a finer balance as we go through the extreme highs and deep lows, it also enables us to interact with others in our environment with greater empathy.

Personally, I use my love of chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo, journaling and reading to stay grounded and peaceful, irrespective of my external stimulus. Sometimes the chanting works and other days the journaling works better. But, on occasion circumstances are such that the mountain is nowhere in sight despite my best efforts. I decide then to change course and look for a new mountain, trusting my intuition when it tells me that it is time to cut my losses.

Undeniably, as Helen says, the sunrise from the hilltop seems brighter and even more gorgeous after spending time traversing a dark valley.

On Dec 31st, I met a friend who shared her excitement with me at completing her goal of chanting Nam-myoho-renge-kyo a million times. She mentioned that as she had approached closure, each day was filled with joyful anticipation. When I called her again a week later, her tone had changed completely. She sounded a little discouraged because she had been unable to regain her momentum and get back into her chanting rhythm.

As I reflected over our conversation, I knew that I had been through it myself many times too. I’d throw myself into preparations for an upcoming Buddhist meeting, and as soon as the event passed I would experience a sense of emptiness and discontent within me. The quality of my prayers would dip for several days before I could pick myself up again and get back on track. I went through these ups and downs as mountains of dreams were fulfilled and valleys of obstacles overcome.

This phase was intense during the initial years of Buddhist practice, but as time passed, and I continued to grow the periods of emptiness shortened and became fewer. It struck me that no matter what philosophy I chose to follow, I would go through valleys and peaks all the time. As long as I recognized what was happening, I could stay in control of my inner void during a valley phase, finding a way to pass through it.

For love to happen as it is meant to, we need to come from a place of complete selflessness, which is a serene state we can enjoy when we let go of our ego and sense of separation from the person we love. Ignoring the ego controlled mind and surrendering to the pure call of our heart ensures the free flow of love from within us.

Inspiration, similar to love, can happen when we let go. Here, we need to let go of our repetitive, mediocre thought process. Heart-rending poetry, art, music and all kinds of creative excellence are most accessible when we shut down our brain and delve into our hearts.

And, both love and inspiration can exist only in sync with the state of freedom. We cannot love but restrict the person we love – bind, condition or demand in a way that takes away their free will. Inspiration too gets activated when we release ourselves from the clutter of meaningless, negative and incessant chatter that we luxuriously indulge in.

When we are soaring on the wings of love and inspiration, that’s when life really begins. We then ally with other love-filled, gloriously inspired and unstoppable human beings, joining hands with them to merge into the generous, creative and all-encompassing Universe, all our hearts beating in the celestial rhythm of peace, purity and passion. So let go of yourself to become love and inspiration, and let the magic of life manifest.