Poop

Poop in the News…

info — Mon, 21 Jan 2013 00:20:48 +0000

Check out the latest poop in the news.

http://www.portlandmercury.com/BlogtownPDX/archives/2013/01/07/someone-is-changing-portland-stop-signs-to-poop

http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/federal-eye/wp/2013/01/10/management-backed-off-social-security-worker-after-flatulence-reprimand-went-public/?hpid=z4

http://www.cbsnews.com/8301-204_162-57564470/fecal-transplants-beat-antibiotics-for-curing-diarrhea-caused-by-c-difficile/

Poop Transplants Make Me Laugh…And Save Lives!

info — Thu, 27 Sep 2012 03:30:22 +0000

I wonder if there is a poop donor list?

Poop Signs Are Funny

info — Wed, 18 Apr 2012 01:47:33 +0000

Everybody Poops.

Eric — Sun, 22 Jan 2012 14:20:23 +0000

As a proud father of a three year old who is just entering the “poop is funny stage,” (does it ever really end?) we discovered a fun game that is not only educational, but plays to both of our fascination with poop;

- Take any children’s book

- Pick the noun and adjective that appear most frequently in the book, and replace with “poopy”. There is a LOT of repetition, so these can be hilarious, since poopy is both a functional noun and adjectives.

- For example, in Clifford the Big Red Dog, Dog, of course becomes poopy. In the “Clifford the Firehouse Dog” we swapped every fire adjective with poopy: “Clifford the PoopyHouse Poopy”.

- This yields great ones like; “Nero lives in a poopyhouse, he is a poopy rescue poopy.” “Just then a group of schoolchildren came in for a poopy safety class.” “Nero showed them what to do if their clothing was on poopy. To smother the poopy, you stop, drop to the floor, and roll until the poopy is out.”

You get the idea. Poopy is now not only fun but educational. Huzzah for poop!

This post was submitted by Eric.

The Poem of Poop

info — Wed, 28 Dec 2011 00:02:59 +0000

The literary genius who penned this poem really captures how I feel right now. Poop can make you happy. Poop can make you sad. Well said, little one. Well said. You’ve inspired me to post again.

Poop makes me sad

info — Sat, 10 Dec 2011 19:57:59 +0000

We’re taking a break from updating the site. Hopefully we’ll be posting again sometime in 2012.

Happy Halloween!

info — Sun, 30 Oct 2011 00:51:53 +0000

UFC Fighter Just Farted

info — Fri, 07 Oct 2011 04:32:55 +0000

UFC Fighter Farts on Live TV – watch more funny videos

This is Bourbon Street.

info — Tue, 20 Sep 2011 02:53:09 +0000

This comes from a friend of mine. He was walking down Bourbon Street with a group of his buddies and they noticed a woman laughing crazily to herself. People are kind of looking at her they walk by but its Bourbon street so its to be expected. All of a sudden she pulls down her spandex and just starts pooping. Right there on the sidewalk. He described it as not a healthy stool. Parents were covering their children’s eyes as everyone now hurried past her (why children are on Bourbon street in the first place is beyond me). The woman simply pulls up her spandex and start laughing hysterically to herself, totally unfazed by what she’d just done. Naturally, my buddy decides to casually walk up to her and take a picture with his camera phone. Priceless.

“I’m Pooping”

info — Sat, 17 Sep 2011 05:13:52 +0000

Turd Burgers For All

info — Fri, 08 Jul 2011 03:10:21 +0000

Poop Doesn’t Make Some Guys Laugh

Tootsarelong — Tue, 03 May 2011 01:20:21 +0000

SHARD ALERT: OMG…ok so I was with the boy I liked just hanging out…and I was wearing a dress with a thong..we were at the mall and we decited we wanted to see a movie…so we went to see dance flick…well I was laughing soo hard I farted!!…then after the movie when the lights went on…next thing I know I stood up and poop came running down my leg and he looked at me like WTH??!!…he hasn’t talked to me since:(

This post was submitted by Tootsarelong.

PMML’s Favorite Scene from Community

info — Tue, 12 Apr 2011 04:09:56 +0000

Down with the Automatic Flusher!

info — Tue, 12 Apr 2011 03:44:56 +0000

The office bathrooms are equipped with over excited automatic flushers. I hate automatic flushers for several reasons. First and foremost, when you are mid-business, the back splash is disgusting. Poop particles being sprayed up all your bits is too much to bare. I also miss the opportunity to admire my handy work when the automatic flusher goes off the second you sit up or adjust your weight. One of my biggest regrets in life is pooping a perfect question mark, with dot and all, and not being able to capture an image before the damn automatic flusher took it down.

Anyways, on this day I was enjoying my mid-morning relief, and there was some resistance, so I shifted my weight to get better leverage and the damn flusher went off. I raised my booty off the seat to avoid the splash. Relieved I had avoided that nastiness, I sat back down on the seat. When I was finished, I stood up and to my horror realized there was poop EVERYWHERE–all over the seat, all over the back of my leg, all over the OUTSIDE of my pants. Terror ensued as I quickly tried to clean the seat and my legs off before anyone walked in. Multiple handfuls of toilet paper later, I ran to the sink to try to get the poop off the outside of my pants. How the hell did this happen!? I did my best to clean the mess, but the smell was still pungent, even after direct application of soap, lotion, and air freshener (yes, this is a full service office bathroom). I had done my best, and hoped to hide the rest of the afternoon in my office. That lasted about an hour until my boss called me into his office. This seriously happens once a month. I casually walk in with a pad of paper covering my backside, I stand the entire 30 minutes, with my back to the wall, and am pleading in my head for the smell not to be as foul to him, as it is to me. Thankfully, I don’t think he noticed or if he did he was polite enough not to say anything. This isn’t supposed to happen when you’re an adult…what the f.

Hong Kong Poopey

info — Mon, 14 Feb 2011 03:07:57 +0000

A friend of mine was in Hong Kong and he happens to be a bit of a sleep walker. The second night he was there he woke up in the middle of the street only in his boxers. The only reason he woke up is because he really really had to poop. He tried to get back into the apartment he was staying in only to discover he was locked out. He started yelling for someone to let him in, but it was late, and he was a half naked American, so he had no hope. Deciding to abandon that plan, he frantically tried to find a place to let it go. He thought an alley would be perfect. So he stumbles through the dark and finds an alley and gets some relief. It was a real mess, as he described. He was grabbing leaves and anything that was near by to contain the mess as best he could. Thinking he had done a good job, he went back to the apartment gate to await a good samaritan to let him in. He fell asleep curled up at the gate, and finally once the sun came up got back in. After sleeping for a couple hours, he and his buddy came back outside to explore the city. He told his friend about his night time adventure and pointed out the alley that was his savior. His buddy, a native of Hong Kong, was quick to point out that it was not in fact an alley he was pointing to. Upon further inspection it was a row of apartments/condos, and where he had left his mark, was a note: “If your pet makes a mess, please clean it up.” A clear outline of what was a door mat lay in front of the door next to dark smears all over the sidewalk…

Fast Food Pit Stop Fail

Taco Bell, Wendy's? — Mon, 14 Feb 2011 02:55:13 +0000

Okay, so my uncle has this really funny IBS (irritable bowel syndrome) story he really loves to tell. Okay, here it is: So he was driving on a long car ride, when suddenly he felt this weird pull down by his, his, well, his butt. Then he decided to just do what he could until he got into a town. He thought he felt a fart, and let it out as if it was nothing. But when he finished, he felt something wet in his pants. He suddenly realized that it wasn’t a fart, it was a shart. Then he felt the pull again, only this time it was much, much, stronger. He knew he couldn’t make it another 10 minutes, so he pulled into a nearby parking lot. But there were two restaurants there that he could choose from. He didn’t know if he could go into Taco Bell or Wendy’s. He took about 5 minutes to decide, then realized he can’t make it much longer. So he finally decided to go into Wendy’s. So he went in, and there were about four people waiting to go to the bathroom. He knew the line was too long, so when the next person finished, he dashed in before someone else could take it. He went in and ran to the toilet. Once he was sitting on the toilet, he let it all out. Then he stuck his hand in the toilet paper dispenser to get some toilet paper. But apparently the person before him had used up the last of it! He was looking around frantically, not knowing what to do. So all he could do was use the paper towels over by the sink. He got up, but still a little bent over. He hopped over to the sink, and when he did, a little bit of poop dripped off of his butt. Then he quickly got the paper towels and wiped, then flushed them down the toilet. He got another paper towel and cleaned up his,er,mess. Then the toilet overflowed because he used too many paper towels. So he ran out of the bathroom, only to be stopped by some women waiting to go to the bathroom. He didn’t understand, but didn’t have time to think about it at the moment. He ran back into his car, then quickly drove away, hoping he wouldn’t get sued or something. As he was backing his car out, he suddenly realized why there were women by the bathroom door. “Oh, no!” he thought, shocked. He realized he had accidentally gone into the WOMENS bathroom, instead of the mens!

This post was submitted by Taco Bell, Wendy's?.

The More You Know

info — Sat, 22 Jan 2011 17:26:55 +0000

Thanks http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/2RmuSJ/www.pixlmonster.com/uglyowl/poop/!

Insight into PMML’s Soul

info — Wed, 19 Jan 2011 06:13:44 +0000

As I reflect back on the path that led me to PoopMakesMeLaugh, I think I have found the very beginning. This gem might very well be what began my strong belief that poop is funny and can (and should) be laughed at without shame. As a youngster, my best friend and I would put on Green Jelly and turn the volume down so low that we had to have our ears by the speakers to hear it. We could not let our parents hear what we were listening to, as they surely would not approve. Though the video is a bit more gross out than I think is required, the song is genius. Here it is: Green Jelly’s Misadventures of Shitman. Let this inspire all of you to begin a life filled with worthwhile poop humor.

Nothing Says Christmas Like A Farting Elephant!

info — Thu, 16 Dec 2010 01:39:57 +0000

We know what we’re getting everyone for christmas: Norman PhartEphant. Check it out at http://normanphartephant.com/ and http://www.fiercefuntoys.com/sitebuildercontent/sitebuilderfiles/normanbookflip.mov

The Office Crop Duster

info — Thu, 21 Oct 2010 04:15:55 +0000

Poop Makes Me…Green?

info — Wed, 29 Sep 2010 06:19:23 +0000

Dog Poop Power

Ambien Pooping

info — Wed, 25 Aug 2010 03:28:05 +0000

I’ve heard of people eating and driving without knowing it on Ambien, so I was weary when I first tried it. The first couple nights I used the sleep I did not have a problem, so I stopped worrying. That was clearly a mistake. I was having trouble sleeping last night and turned to my little helpers. This morning I woke up and headed to the bathroom. I look down at the seat and there is dried poop all over it. I started cursing my roommate and was generally displeased. As I went to get the disinfectant, I had a brief flash of memory. I think I was in the bathroom at some point last night. After cleaning the seat, I am sitting on it and notice a huge turd stain in my drawers. Then it all came rushing back. I had an IBS moment in the middle of the night and rushed to the bathroom. This is where my memory stops. It was not however where my poop stopped. I imagine some of it made it into the toilet, and I just pulled up early-causing the spray to hit the toilet and my underoos. I cautiously approached my bed to find a decent amount of poop smear. So it made it there too. Awesome. Lesson learned. For the lactose intolerant: ice cream + ambien=giant mess.

Margaret Cho Makes Me Laugh

info — Fri, 20 Aug 2010 04:51:26 +0000

Poop Did Not Make This Passenger Laugh

info — Sun, 15 Aug 2010 06:48:27 +0000

Seat 29e — Airline Bathroom Row

If It’s Brown Flush It Down…Or Not

Jen — Sat, 07 Aug 2010 05:27:40 +0000

I was at this hole in the wall bar in Chicago drinking with about 10 people total in the entire bar. I had to pee so I thought “oh boy, can’t wait to see what this bathroom looks like” but much to my surprise it was really nice! It was clean and tiled nice, but no doors on the stalls, just curtains. So i went in the second stall (there were only 2), flush, and head out back to the bar. About ten minutes later.. gurgle gurgle… uh oh, I have to poop! I don’t have an issue with pooping in public other than no one can be inthe bathroom with me while I’m doing it. Well this bar was so small that the bathroom was literally steps away from people, and there were so few people there that if I did go, they’d all know it was me. All these thoughts rushed through my head but I couldn’t hold it any longer so I just went. I went into the second stall again and let it out. OH. MY. GOD. Biggest poop of my life. I was laughing so hard at the child’s arm that I just pooped out and bummed that I didn’t have my camera with me to take a picture of it because it was impressive. So after a few minutes of chuckles I wipe, pull my pants up, wipe a tear from laughing, go to flush and…. nothing. It would not flush. I start to sweat. What the hell am I going to do? Ok, it’ll be ok.. maybe no one will notice. I covered it with toilet paper and put the seat down, washed my hands and got the hell out of there. No one at the bar even realized I was gone! Success!! Just then my friend says “how are the bathrooms? I have to pee.” I immediately died laughing and had to tell her the story. Luckily, she went in the bathroom and tried to flush it again for me and it worked! Pfew!!!

This post was submitted by Jen.

It’s Always Sunny-Who Pooped the Bed?

info — Sun, 01 Aug 2010 19:49:09 +0000

Karate Poop!

info — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 06:29:08 +0000

Dropping one low at Lowes

Bob — Fri, 16 Jul 2010 06:18:27 +0000

I’m at my local Lowes looking for a tool or something when I realize that it’s time to take a poop. I have no idea what I was looking for due to the traumatic experience I am about to divulge. Now I’m not sure why some Lowes stores have the bathroom in the front and some have it in the back, but I was CERTAIN that it was in the back of this one. I paced the back wall, looking up and down for a toilet. Nothing. My fists and arse were clinched and sweat was tumbling from every pore of my body when I realized that I was about to diarrhea in my pants in a very crowded Lowes. Some refrigerators were wrapped and on crates against the back wall and I slipped amongst them, still in plain site if someone had happened to walk by. I pulled my pants down with lightening speed and went to town all over the floor. No one saw me, but I was unsuccessful in keeping it off of my clothes. I relocated to an aisle away from the poop and had to call my girlfriend to bring me a jacket to put around my waist to make the escape all the way through the store and into the parking lot. It was August. I looked pretty suspect with a jacket around my waist. It was a full year before I had the courage to go back in there, knowing the words, “That’s him!!!” would be screamed by every employee as I entered the door. I just feel sorry for the poor soul that had to clean it up.

This post was submitted by Bob.

Happy 4th of July…

info — Mon, 05 Jul 2010 01:55:08 +0000

An American tradition, the 4th of July parade. Three six year olds were very excited to be second in the parade, directly behind the marshall who happened to be riding on a horse. These six year olds were part of a gymnastics troupe, tasked with doing cartwheels, hand stands, and sommersaults down the street. Behind the horse. And they happily performed their gymnastics throughout the parade route. They were collected by their parents at the end of the parade, and to the horror of the parents, they were covered in poop. horse poop. they had done handstands in horse poop all afternoon. Sweating in the heat, they tried to wipe their faces off…with their horse poop hands. Happy 4th of July everyone!

Pooping on a Jet Plane

info — Wed, 16 Jun 2010 02:28:16 +0000

I was on a plane with my boyfriend in the middle of some real turbulence. The seat belt sign was on and the flight attendants weren’t letting anyone get up even to go to the bathroom. He looks at me and tells me he really really has to go. He decides to try to make a run for it. The second he leaves his seat, the flight attendant is on his ass, demanding he sit back down. He pleads with her that he really has to go to the bathroom but she is not interested in hearing it. So he sits back down and starts squeezing my hand as he tries to fight through. I look at him and tell him its ok, he should just let it go. He thought I was insane, the idea of pooping his pants on an airplane completely out of the question. He kept clenching, kept gripping my hand, as we stared intently at the fasten seat belt sign. He was sweating profusely and I tried again to convince him he should just let it go. He fought and fought, and then suddenly the tight grip on my hand loosened and his face relaxed. I yelled at him, I CANT BELIEVE YOU JUST POOPED YOUR PANTS ON THE PLANE! He had to sit there in his own poop, until the turbulence stopped. I had to sit next to him…