John 2:1-11

The first recorded miracle in the gospels is Jesus turning water into wine. He didn’t just say, “boom” and wine appeared, although He is capable of this. He required His disciples to outwardly establish their faith in Jesus through obedience. Asking His disciples to put water into ceremonial cleaning cisterns, then drawing from those cisterns, trusting God they were drawing wine for the master of the banquet. Ok, did I say that correctly… Yes. Cleaning cisterns. Sounds kind of gross. I wonder if the disciples were thinking, “you want us to do what, and give this water to the master of the banquet?” Whatever their thoughts or fears, they obeyed, and God did fulfill His promise. The water had turned into the best wine of the night, but God required an action on the disciples part to reveal himself in this situation.

John 9

A man blind until Jesus entered his life. Jesus put mud on his eyes, and told the man to go to the pool of Siloam and wash. Not until he left the pool did he come home seeing. If the man refused to obey, perhaps he would still be blind. Unfortunately, sometimes it takes us coming to the place where we have nothing to lose to actually look to God and simply obey.

Salvation

We say we have faith and believe in God, but never open our mouth with the things we profess to believe behind closed doors. Or worse yet, boldly proclaim, yet fail to represent a life changed by God. If we are not confident to share what we believe with others, do we really believe it ourselves? When I see people confidently taking a stand for what they believe, it is an alluring quality. It draws me to desire the confidence needed to be that bold. To continue to seek out truth and fully have a grasp on what I believe, not only in words, but also in action. With the hopes that it will draw others to the saving grace of God.

Wrap Up

If we sit waiting for that unanswered prayer, maybe we should consider that the next step is action. Is God laying on your heart to witness to a friend? Perhaps you are in financial distress and God is telling you the way He will provide is through a new job, or perhaps financial cuts that may initially cramp your style? Are you praying for opportunities to serve and realize the opportunity God is leading you to is serving with somebody you don’t like, or something that you didn’t think was for you? Do you say you trust God, yet when you feel the gentle nudging of the Holy Spirit to say or do something, you always find yourself second guessing?

Obedience isn’t just on our terms. Obedience that makes faith come alive is obedience for whatever God calls you to and through, even if we can’t comprehend it at the moment. God sees the big picture. Lets keep our eyes and hearts open to the opportunities God has for us and watch as God does more than we can ever ask or imagine.

We continually remember before our God and Father your work produced by faith, your labor prompted by love, and your endurance inspired by hope in our Lord Jesus Christ.

1 Thessalonians 1:3

A. Pray… Talking to God puts things in perspective

For your husband: What’s your husband going through? Is he stressed because of work? Is he tired? Does he feel overwhelmed?

For yourself: Are you feeling lonely, tired, overwhelmed? Are there qualities in your husband you realize you just have to adjust to, and in perspective not that big of a deal? Are you expecting your husband to fill areas only God can?

B. Don’t talk negative about your husband to friends.

He may not be perfect, but he is your husband. Keep your fights and annoyances “in house”. A revolutionary idea, this may even force us to tell our husbands what’s wrong, so they have a fighting chance to help resolve some of this conflict.

A check for me is putting Myself in His shoes. Would I like Him to talk about Me in the same way to His friends.

An excellent wife who can find? She is far more precious than jewels. The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life.

Proverbs 31:10-12

C. Respect your husband’s words, even if you don’t see eye to eye.

In House example: Andy and I don’t have the same threshold for cleanliness. I can overlook more things, but because Andy likes a cleaner house, I try to keep the house as clean as I can… starting at 4:30 that is. This is not a subservient demand this is your best friend sharing his heart and what would help him relieve some of his stress. Out of respect you try to honor that request.

D. Don’t undermine your husband in front of others.

Especially your children! They pick up on everything. My kids are all under 3, but they are so perceptive. If your husband makes a suggestion don’t always feel the need to correct or make him look foolish. We are our husbands helpmeet working together as a team, but sometimes we don’t always want to help. We want to micromanage every facet of their life.

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Proverbs 25:24

E. Encourage your husband to his face and to your friends.

Spend more time focusing on his strengths than his weaknesses. Don’t wait to receive a compliment before you give a compliment.

An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.

Proverbs 12:4

F. Submit to your Husband.

I am sure to ruffle some feathers here, but the Greek word for submit in Col. 3:18 is hupotassó, which means to choose to be in subjection according to God’s plan. Like everything God does there is order and structure. In 1 Cor. 11:3 it says that the husband is the head of the wife. I don’t picture an overlord, yelling and controlling every movement. I picture a forerunner for the family, guiding the steps of the family, taking that weight and responsibility of making the ultimate call on tough life choices.

This structure is not to abuse us, or mistreat us, it is used to teach us sacrificial love. Is our husband perfect… No, but can we learn to be his helpmeet, and honor him despite his imperfections, encouraging him to be the best man he can be.

The beauty of it all, is that submission is not merely confined to women, but also men. Col. 3:19 states one way that men submit to God is by loving their wives. Now what woman doesn’t want to be loved?

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

Colossians 3:18

Final Nuggets

I am not saying these suggestions are easy. Sometimes it feels like the person closest to us has hurt us the most. But you are never going to get the victory in your marriage if you stick with the same he did/she did routine. Nobody is without fault. Who knows maybe if you start seeing your husband with respect and focusing on his strengths, he will begin to see you through a different pair of eyes as well. Continue towards building up your relationship, working together as a team. Start enjoying the man you are spending the rest of your life with. Marriage is not a penance, it is a gift.

Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their work. If one falls down, his friend can help him up.

Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

The Ten Commandments

The Ten Commandments are the most fundamental of laws, ranging from don’t steal to don’t murder. In this cluster of valuable commandments “Thou shalt not use God’s name in vain” is listed third. Yet, it has been tossed to the side over the years. It may seem trivial to some, but in essence, it’s lowering the name of God to a filler word. Eeks!

You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain, for the Lord will not hold him guiltless who takes His name in vain.

Ex. 20:7
The word vain can be defined as: irreverent manor.

Motives

I know it isn’t always intentional. Most people don’t have this secret vendetta, “I am going to use God’s name in vain today”. It just has become like second nature. The God of the universe isn’t even who they are thinking about when they say, “OMG”, but right there is a trigger that you’re saying God’s name in vain. You’re not even thinking of God while you are speaking about Him.

Checkpoint

When you are saying God’s name is it in a honorable fashion, is it for prayer or thanksgiving?

This topic is one where we can over think. Don’t let it become that. You know in your heart if you are honoring God when you say His name, so speak in a way that others see that God is someone to be respected and revered.

God is love.

1 John 4:8

God’s Love

Yet, what if love didn’t just grace our doors by those that love us? What if we experienced love and kindness from those we have hurt or were mean to? It would blow our minds. Wouldn’t we stop and question what was different? This is what God has planned for us, not just to love those that “earned” it but to love those that don’t deserve it.

• Love your enemies and pray for them that persecute you (Matt. 5:44)
  This is so much easier said than done. I realize this. That is why we need our big God to work these everyday miracles in us and through us. Loving our enemies and doing good to them. Don’t wait for them to do something nice first. Show them the love of Christ. We received Christ’s undeserved love, we should also be willing to give it.
• Do good to your enemies, and lend to them without expecting to get anything back. (Luke 6:35)
• Don’t repay evil for evil. If someone does you wrong, don’t feel you have to get even with them. (1 Peter 3:9)
• Love your neighbor as yourself. (Mark 12:31)
  How much do we care for ourselves? Would we be content without a meal, clothing, a roof over our head? Are we concerned about being right with God? Think about what you desire for yourself, even the bare essentials, and consider if you care enough for your neighbor to also have their needs met. I don’t mean making your neighbor dependent on you for their basic needs, but being willing to help a neighbor take the next step…whether it is sharing Christ with them, connecting them with food pantries, or whatever the case may be.

We as a society are in survival mode. We think about number one, and that is all we can handle. Maybe this season of life that really is all you can handle, but if not consider looking outside your four walls. There are opportunities all around us.

Good Samaritan

In the story of the good Samaritan. A priest , and a Levite passed by a wounded pedestrian. They were too busy to stop or just not interested. But a Samaritan passed by and took time to bandage his wounds. He then proceeded to take him to an inn to care for him while he recovered. He valued human life. He could have been just as busy as the priest and Levite, but the Samaritan decided to do good, not just look good.

He went to him and bandaged his wounds, pouring on oil and wine. Then he put the man on his own donkey, took him to an inn and took care of him.

Luke 10:34

Lets pray for the love only God can give us. Love that doesn’t come naturally. Love that loves our enemies and does good to them; that loves others greater than ourselves. This love is rare and beautiful, it is Christ emanating through us.

My son Timmy sporting his Daddy's slippers.

Who knew humility would be served to me by a three foot tall toddler. My first child, Timothy, bright eyed lover of life, has stolen my heart, but has also caused me to eat some extra chocolate (for medicinal purposes). I am the mother who strolled into the grocery store, only to stroll right out, because their child was screaming bloody murder while trying to leap from the cart. I am the mother who had to straight arm my child to try to get him into his car seat long enough to buckle him in. I am the mother who tried to get two kids in the house, while one is screaming “help” loud enough for neighbors 5 blocks away to hear.

I am “that” mother.

Warning Signs

Since the age of 6 months I should have known I was in trouble when he refused to allow me to feed him jar foods. His coordination was not there yet, but apparently my E-Trade baby was independent enough to handle it on his own. So let’s just say there were a lot of days the floor looked like we had a food fight. Now, if you are saying, “you’re the mother, just feed him,” this article is not for you. You do not have a strong willed child. We finally compromised by letting him have a spoon in one hand, while refilling the other spoon and then swapping. Hey, if it works, go for it.

Jekyll and Hyde

Tim really has such a kind, sweet heart; it amazes me when he gets in one of his focused tirades. There are times when he is so sweet to his sister, dad or me that I could just melt. Then, there are other days that I could melt from the glossy stares of onlookers. Their face screams, “She must not be disciplining her child for him to act that way.”

One day, I was talking to a friend, who I know had honest intentions; nonchalantly said, “Parents are praised when their kids are good; we should assume when the kids are bad, it is the parents fault.” I think at that moment I initially told her I didn’t think so. But I don’t even know, because at that moment my fears reached the surface. I had been trying so hard with my son, and I felt at that moment I was being told I was not good enough.

Sticking it out

We have tried numerous disciplinary actions. After a few months, we have to switch up the disciplinary action of choice, because he starts to enjoy the discipline, or at least pretend. On countless occasions we have told him no for the same thing 10 times over, but he’ll just happily repeat the same thing. We are currently going with the time out approach to discipline. Every 2 minutes we see if he has corrected his action. Like the Cheezit commercials we check to see if he’s ready yet. Lets just say, the other day it took 45 minutes to get him to eat two bites of spaghetti for dinner. Mind you, he used to love spaghetti, but that’s the point with strong willed kids, they are just always testing boundaries, holding off until you break. His stamina is amazing.

Transitions can be hard

Transitions can be very hard. He will dilly-dally until you pick him up and remove him from a situation, which undoubtedly will upset him and lead to a fun bout of kicking and screaming. Yesterday, I was pretty sure he yelled help, as I tried to guide him to the door, while holding his sister. Who was he calling help to? I guess anyone who would listen.

There is light at the end of the tunnel

Now I don’t want to completely throw Timmy under the bus. His attitude is improving, and that allows for his infectious personality to really shine. But there are days that he is so focused on his game plan, so determined to win out, that it can be very defeating as a parent. I just wanted to share my story so other mothers know they are not alone.

So what do we do? When all the handbooks tell us if we discipline a certain way, we will have a new kid before we know it, and yet some of us are left stranded, feeling helpless, as the temper tantrums still come.

Some things that help most of the time

• Warn the child that change is coming. “This is your last book” or “We are leaving after one more slide.”
• Routine and consistency. Kind of goes with number one, it just prepares them for what to expect.
• Being on the same page with your spouse. I always tell Tim, “Me and Daddy are on the same team.” As soon as Tim thinks he is in charge, we have lost the fight.
• Encouraging your child, even when they aren’t vying for it. If Tim is doing his own thing in the corner, or I see him share with his sister, anything that I want to encourage him to do, I praise him. “You are such a great big brother. Thank you for sharing with your sister.” “That is such a great coloring job; you are an artist.” When we take the initiative, he is usually so appreciative and so sweet with his words.
• Include your child in your activities. It makes them feel apart of grownup things and part of the bigger picture. E.g. unloading the dishwasher, handing me the laundry. Although it takes longer to include him in chores, it 1. gives him an activity and 2. allows him to feel appreciated and that he is helping.
• Once you say something to your child, stick with it. Don’t back down, no matter how inconvenient or trying on your patience it is, whether it is a reward or a punishment.
• Let them know when they make you sad, it connects them with an emotion they know, and can associate the problem with a negative feeling.

These are just some of the things that I have found work with my strong willed child most of the time. There will be those days that nothing works, but stay encouraged. Continue to love on them, focus on their strengths, and make the most of every moment. They are God’s personalized gift and responsibility to you. Not only were they handpicked for you, you were handpicked for them!

I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made.

Psalm 139:14

We Grow Tired

Our hope starts to dwindle, and our prayer starts to become more of a tag line. “Why am I bothering?” The once elegant prayer has turned into the bare minimal. Fears and tiredness set in with desires for an answer.

One More Time

Then, God tells us to pray the same prayer one more time or walk in faith down a particular road again… “One more time God? But I already _______ (fill in blank).” “One more time” is the reply.

He said, “Throw your net on the right side of the boat, and you will find some.” When they did, they were unable to haul the net in because of the large number of fish.

John 21:6

John 21:6 portrays fishermen tired after a long night of catching no fish. At that time, Jesus approached them. The fishermen were no doubt ready to move on with their day. Hoping another spot may be more promising tomorrow. But God comes along and tells them to toss their net one more time. They obeyed even though they were tired, and their instincts told them to give up.

God Hears Us

God hears our prayers.  Don’t ever give up hope! As long as God still places that burden in your heart, continue to pray in faith. For God is able.

With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God.

Mark 10:27

Obedience is following God, even when we don’t see the end in sight. It is having faith when we are tired. It is praying that prayer one more time. God is faithful and worthy to be trusted with our prayers for the day, the month or the years of our life.

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.

Gal 6:9

The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.

James 5:16

Love is the catalyst of the Christian faith, no longer tied to condemnation; we are freed to love God without guilt or shame. “Though our sins are as scarlet they shall be as white as snow.” (Is. 1:18) This agape love is sealed by the blood of Christ on the cross, as He points to you and me, and says you are worth it. God has given you a free pass to love and be loved. Your past does not define your future. There is forgiveness. So lets live as though we are free.

What shall we say, then? Shall we go on sinning so that grace may increase? By no means! We are those who have died to sin; how can we live in it any longer? ….. we too may live a new life.

Romans 6:1,2,4

Church Wake up!

This is not a condemnation alert. This is a, “Church, what are we doing?” Why can’t we see the big picture? It’s kind of like a man on death row being pardoned yet choosing to stay on death row. Sin eats away at us, no matter how temporarily filling it seems. It is a cancer.

Don’t you know that when you offer yourselves to someone as obedient slaves, you are slaves of the one you obey—whether you are slaves to sin, which leads to death, or to obedience, which leads to righteousness?

Romans 6:16-17

Freedom in Christ

Yet we all buy into the temporary satisfaction of sin, in one form or another. And because it appears hard to keep the standard of God’s holiness and goodness in site we not only dismiss moral standards, but write them off when others address us. “It’s none of their business”or “they are judging”. Sure both of those statements are true, but just because they are true, doesn’t mean we can’t take the advice and actually learn from it, as opposed to living in self inflicted bondage. We keep the friends that allow us to live however we feel close to the cuff because they are usually more warm and fuzzy and distance ourselves from those who may call us out. But where does this get us? Further and further from the One we need to run to. Let’s help each other. Lets hold each other accountable. There’s freedom in Christ, but it’s only freedom if we Live Free.

Reading the Bible. Is it Worth it?

Lets see, our favorite show or the Bible? Who wins out in this battle of our time and focus? If we really break it down, should we even be asking that question? Or perhaps you have already read the Bible once so you say, “I’m good”. I can relate with this; I generally only read a book once. From their it goes on the shelf to accumulate dust. But the Bible isn’t just a book to read the cliff notes on, it’s a life manual.

What Are the Benefits?

Increases our faith

Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the word of God.

Romans 10:17

Active and relevant to our current joys and struggles

For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword, it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the thoughts and attitudes of the heart.

Hebrews 4:12

A guide to direct our path, helping us to distinguish between right and wrong

Your word is a lamp to my feet and a light for my path.

Psalm 119:105

Reminder of God’s faithfulness

For the word of the LORD is right and true; He is faithful in all He does.

Psalm 33:4

Breeds wisdom

Fear of the LORD is the foundation of true wisdom. All who obey His commandments will grow in wisdom. Praise Him forever!

Psalm 111:10

Gives us full assurance of the hope we have and allows us to experience the joy of salvation

Finding the Time – Get Creative

• Strive for five – Ok, I stole this slogan from my exercise class at church. But seriously, even if it is just five minutes a day, you will be amazed as you start to see God work through you and in you.
  

  If you have time to brush your teeth, then you have time to do a five minute devo.

• Get an audio Bible to listen to on the way to work
• Play mp3 as you get ready for your day
• Incorporate your family – My two year old has been listening with me. We each get an ear bud.
• Get a mini devo to do during breakfast or dinner
• Listen to audio Bible while exercising
• Look for ways to incorporate God into your everyday life

Gods Guidebook

Nobody is perfect. I get that, and I am not claiming to be. But there is a guidebook for us to follow called the Bible. Every day we are faced with choices. Choices to love, choices to hate, choices to obey, choices to live for ourselves. If we break apart the scriptures to read whatever we want, why pretend we are obeying them at all, then question God, as though He is the one on the hot seat? If you built an entertainment stand wrong, but refused to read the directions, would you get mad at the manufacturer?

Do not add to what I command you and do not subtract from it, but keep the commands of the LORD your God that I give you.

Deuteronomy 4:2

Our Way is Better

This ideology suggests that we think we know better than God. That our way, through our pieced together theology and common knowledge will get us the best possible outcome. But, ya know what, I don’t believe it will. It may give you a false facade that things are going ok, but you are still hurting. You are trusting in your own strength and comprehension in a world that has so many incomprehensible things.

Wishy Washy

We wake up one morning, feeling tired, groggy, more vulnerable to negativity. God must not hear me. We are presented with a choice to do something that God says is wrong. Lies seep in our pores… “Is it really that wrong”, “Everybody is doing it”, “It was a different culture back then”. We get a little more desensitized to God’s truth and jaded that God has not heard our early morning prayers, so we choose to sin, because If God doesn’t love us enough to listen to us. We don’t love God enough to obey.

Next morning the sun is shining, the birds are chirping. God is my dearest friend.

Again you are presented with the choice to follow God and obey or go your own way. You choose to listen to God the whole day, to reward Him for His favor, because who wouldn’t want to give praise to a God you know is capable of the impossible.

We are no longer to be children, tossed here and there by waves and carried about by every wind of doctrine.

Ephesians 4:14

Roller Coaster

Up and down you go; your relationship with God is as temperamental as your choice of coffee creamer. If a friend was as wishy washy as we sometimes are with God would your friendship endure? Good and bad days are going to come but trusting on God’s faithfulness through it all will help you put those bad days into perspective.

Emotional Blackmail

If we lean on our emotions to dictate our life or relationship to God, we are asking for trouble. This may reveal itself through questioning our closeness to God based on our circumstances. This breeds emotional turmoil. Life is a choice every day. A choice to love, obey, and honor God even when we don’t “feel” like it. The beauty of it all is that the rewards are joy and peace, which you can’t put price tags on and will be worth the long hard journey.

Definition of gossip:

• Dictionary – a rumor, chatty talk
• Bible – one who reveals secrets, one who goes about as a talebearer or scandal-monger.

A gossiper is a person who has privileged information about people and proceeds to reveal that information to those who have no business knowing it.

Gossip is distinguished from “sharing” information in two ways:

1. Intent. Gossipers often have the goal of building themselves up by making others look bad and exalting themselves as some kind of bearers of knowledge.
2. The type of information shared. Gossipers speak of the faults and failings of others, or reveal potentially embarrassing or shameful details regarding the lives of others without their knowledge or approval. Even if they mean no harm, it is still gossip.

 A gossip betrays a confidence; so avoid a man who talks too much.

Proverbs 20:19

In Romans 1 you find gossip in a list of sins and wickedness. The chapter ends saying that even when we know it’s wrong we do it anyway and worse yet we encourage other to do it too.

Rule 1a: No prayer gossiping

You can possibly avoid this by:

• First asking the person if it is ok to share their prayer request.
• Don’t share their name. God knows who it is.

Check point – Ask yourself why you want to share this. Would you share it, if they were in the room.

Rule 2: Choose positive words

Do your words encourage others?

Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them.

Ephesians 4:29

What comes out of your mouth gives a picture of what is truly in your heart. If you are bitter, angry, or unforgiving your words will probably not be full of love. If you allow your heart to be filled with mercy, grace, and love your words will be filled with the same.

A good person produces good things from the treasury of a good heart, and an evil person produces evil things from the treasury of an evil heart. What you say flows from what is in your heart.

Luke 6:45

Check point – What is in your heart?

Rule 3: Tame your tongue

God gave us two ears and one mouth so that we could listen more and talk less. When we open our mouths we can either bless or curse. It only takes a spark, remember, to set off a forest fire. A careless or wrongly placed word out of your mouth can do that.

He who guards his mouth and his tongue keeps himself from calamity.

Proverbs 21:23

Carrie Stimpson story — when we girls “share” with our girlfriends, we might have moved on the next day and forgiven the person, but the girlfriend we talked to still remembers the negative talk about the other person.

Check point — WAIT: Why Am I Talking?

My latest nugget. When I feel like I am gabbing, rambling, talking out of turn, talking over someone, filling the silence… WAIT!

Rule 4: Silence is good

Don’t just talk to fill the air with conversation.