You see, while I am both fat and down to party, I’m normally the guy who makes his way to the couch for a brief nap. That’s sort of what I do. Like all the time. I mean, if I manage to make it thru a gathering without dozing off, it’s a notable event. And it’s not like I get bored or anything — I just really like sleeping.

So I guess what I’m getting at is that this shirt speaks to me. Well, more like who I’d like to be. But it’d really be my jam if it said, “I’M FAT, YOU GUYS PARTY, I’LL BE OVER ON THE COUCH WITH MY EYES CLOSED”.

That’s probably a little too wordy tho, right?

$22.00 | URL | Credit | M: S – 3XL, F: S – XL

To be honest, I didn’t think that I’d ever be the sort of guy to express unbridled excitement at the start of a new season. But here we are in 2010 and I’m ready to spend my summer drinking beers and rooting for the Dodgers.

Like many kids in the 80′s, I spent a considerable amount of my youth collecting and trading baseball cards. And while I tended to prefer Topps over all the other brands, I ended up amassing a decent stack of ones from Donruss too. In fact, despite having Topps rookie cards for the likes of Jose Canseco, Barry Bonds and Jim Abbott, the crown jewel of my collection was the Bo Jackson Donruss Rated Rookie card that I somehow managed to score.

So in celebration of all those old hunks of cardboard — and the start of a new season — I’m running this tee from No Mas. It’s a design that gives me nostalgia pangs more than anything else, but I’m sure at least a few of y’all are feeling them too.

$32.00 | URL | Credit | M: S – 4XL

I’ll be honest. Before I laid eyes on this design, I didn’t think Motörhead could possibly get any more metal. Apparently, I couldn’t have been more wrong tho. Once you add “Curb Your Enthusiasm” star Larry David to the mix — and that goes for almost any situation — shit gets cranked up to twelve.

That’s right, Spinal Tap. Not eleven. Twelve.

So what are you waiting for? Snatch this one up already!

$15.00 | PayPal | URL | M: S – 2XL

Flip flop weather! Afternoons in the park! Late night beach bonfires! Trips to the Farmers Market! Barbecues! Picnics!

Then again, LA’s one of those places where you can get away with doing most of that stuff year around. Still, there’s something magical about this time of year. You can’t really deny that.

One of the patterns that just sort of say springtime without screaming it out loud has always been gingham. Well, at least to me it has. And while the pattern may come off as a little “country” to some folks, I love the shit out of the simplicity of this design. If only they had it in a yellow on kelly green or red on heather grey colorway. *shrug* Oh well… Maybe someday.

$20.00 | PayPal | URL | M: S – XL, F: S – L

Preshrunk pal Mack sent along this totally epic video that’s bound for viral glory. That is, if it hasn’t already done so by the time you’re reading this. So if you haven’t seen it, watch it! I swear that it’s worth four minutes of your time.

But since this is a t-shirt blog (where I’m supposed to link up stuff that’s for sale) I’d totally suck if I didn’t point out that they’re selling the actual shirts from the video for $20 to $30 a pop. Or if that’s too steep, they’ve also got really decent replicas for a more modest $18 price tag.

Think of this as the t-shirt blogger equivalent of yelling “first” — even if I did manage to stumble across it on Tumblr…

The Mac nerds in the crowd might remember Sebastiaan’s fantastic Exploded Settings tee. If you don’t tho, that’s totally fine. This design is a celebration of the blue legos that show up in place of Flash content on the iPhone, iPod Touch and iPad. I, for one, hate Flash with a passion.  If you follow me on Twitter, that’s really no secret. I earnestly want to see it stamped out by the likes of HTML5, CSS 3 and Apple’s assorted mobile products. So you can bet your ass that I’ll throw down $22.50 when this unassuming bad boy drops.

If you’re looking for a little context, I suggest you take twenty seconds of your time and check out this video over on the YouTubes:

That’s from Conan’s last Tonight Show a little more than a week ago, and the sentiment is something that really resonated with me. Apparently it moved enough folks to merit the Threadless submission above, a wallpaper and a Facebook Group. So in the interest of helping the cause along, I encourage you to go show it some love. I mean, you really don’t have to. But just know that sitting on your hands may make you come off as some sort of Leno sympathizer. Just sayin’…

You pierced the stratosphere to make sure it was safe for the scientists to go up.  Were it not for you, Alan Shepard would have never had the chance to play that round of golf on the moon.

Then again, it’s not like you had a choice or anything. Still, I appreciate the sacrifice you made — even if you do look super creepy.

$15.00 | Credit | URL | M: S – 2XL

Now I’m not fully aware of the crossover potential between anime and punk rock — but I guess if someone’s making a tee with hefty hat tips to both cultures, it must exist. I mean, it has to, right?

This design is from the fantastic folks over at Chop Shop — who put out some pretty great stuff when they’re not endlessly riffing on the collage tee. It’s nothing personal dudes, honest. It’d just be great if y’all could find a new dead horse to flog, that’s all…

$20.00 | Credit | URL | M: S – 3XL F: S – XL

While it may mostly appeal to the ironic hipster types, this shirt made me laugh out loud the moment I saw it. And since that’s kind of rare, I feel like I had to run it — hipster appeal or not.

Don’t go getting used to me running these sorts of tees, trustafarians. Unless it makes me lollerskate, it’s never gonna show up here. Consider it a commitment to quality. And by that, I mean a commitment to not being annoying.

£20.00 | PayPal | URL | M: S – XL