http://www.problemExchange.comThe most recently problems added to ProblemExchange.com(c) 2006, Uretopia Limited, All rights reserved.5I don't know how to explain this without sounding silly. I am a girl in her early 20's and i am 100% heterosexual and have never questioned this. However, i have been quite adventurous in the past and have kissed a few girls. I am not a lesbian and was not even attracted to these girls sexually, they were friends of mine and we experimented after getting a bit drunk one night. It didn't go any further than french kissing. However, i must admit, i did enjoy it at the time, it did turn me on. I still get turned on by the idea of kissing girls, just for fun, but i only fancy guys and want to have relationships with guys. I know a lot of people do experiment in their younger years but i was just wondering are my feelings normal or am i just weird? As i have stated, i know i am not a lesbian, or even bisexual, so surely this can't be right?http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29710http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29710Fri, 10 Feb 2012 08:04:34 GMTHello, I have a problem and it's really starting to upset me. :( My best friend was going out with a boy about 2/3 years ago, let's call him Adam, and they were seeing each other for about 4 months. They did not progress their relationship any further than kissing, and it ended because he called her fat. (They were only 14/15). My friend then got another boyfriend, let's call him Jack, and has been with him for a year and lost her virginity to him. So anyway, Adam then tells me, about 2 years later, that he likes me. We're in to the same music and I have found him attractive for quite a long time. But because my best friend hates him, I didn't want to upset her and so pretended I didn't like him. I felt horrible about it because he sent me a massive paragraph with his feelings in, and I just sent back a few few breif, harsh lines. This went on for about 6 months, when I finally gave in and apologised to him for being such a bitch with him. I then told my friend that I'd spoken to him and apologised, and then apologized to her for doing so. She had a massive go at me, and I went round to her house to sort it out. I said I would never talk to him again, but she said she wanted me to because she was perfectly fine with it and it didn't bother her. She even said we made a good couple. I said that it wasn't at that stage, but she said that it would get there eventually, but if he hurt me she would come down on him like a ton of bricks. So, I carried on speaking to him, because to me that was giving me the go ahead, am I wrong? :/ and then married him on Facebook. To which she responded by putting on her status that I had lied to her, and that I was a skinny bitch and I should jump of a cliff. I really didn't know what brought this on, so I asked her and she said most of the status' were not about me, which clearly they were. And she was angry because I'd lied to her and should of told her I liked him and was still speaking to him because I said I wouldn't. I apologized, again but then I told her I thought it would be okay because she said she was fine with it and told me to 'go for it'. She read the message, (bbm) but she hasn't replied. I don't know what to do now. Because I think I do like him. She has a reputation for losing friends and I do not see how she could write such horrible things about me when I have been upfront with her and told her I was talking to him. I just don't know what to do. Someone please help me? :(http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29708http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29708Fri, 10 Feb 2012 05:28:27 GMTI am all at blows with my mum, i got pregnant at 16, and kept the baby.. this is where the problems started, she started to critisise me ta every opportunity when i was trying my best, I did everything by myself, and rarely asked for help.. (i am stubborn in that way) My daughter is now five and the teachers say she is gifted, My mum seems to be jealous and everything i do is a problem to her, my choice of partner, moving to a smaller house, wanting to find a job. The problem i have is that she expects so much from me, and she was never the best mother, i have never felt loved by her, she brought men back, she went out with friends alot and left my older sister to babysit us, one day i woke up on my birthday and she wasn't even home yet. I have got over these things, but how can she critisise me? i feel like she is trying to force me into being the mother she never was, but i am young and want her to understand i need to do it my own way (which hasn't failed me so far, my daughter is lovely and well mannered) I went to college to try and please her, she never said well done. I got my A levels and started looking for work, and she sent me a job application for a dinner lady (to put me down) When i was aiming higher and trying to find work in admin. She even told me to stay on benefits as i will be better off, and i should work because i need to be there for my daughter. BUT I WANT TO WORK! she does all the in phases, and when she has a man around she will leave me alone for a few months until they break up. I need my mum to stop being so nasty and manipulative, at times i have felt like she hates me. http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29707http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29707Fri, 10 Feb 2012 04:35:29 GMTI was going out with my ex for over 3 years, during which time he had been in and out of jobs and near the end of our relationship (when it was on and off) he got himself into debt. I split up with him a month ago because of many reasons, including his possessiveness and anger problems. However, since we broke up he has been very down and has spoken about ending his life, although I don't think he would. I know he loves me and is a good person, despite the problems we had. I want to help him because he can't rely on anyone else and I know it seems like a bad idea but I would feel so awful if he got into a worse state than he already is and I worry so much about the debt he is getting in as he hasn't had a job for a few months now. Please help, thanks.http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29701http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29701Thu, 09 Feb 2012 02:53:08 GMTDear Aggie, my anoying step sister "Katie" keeps calling me names and every time Katie dose I hit her. What should I DO? http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29693http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29693Thu, 09 Feb 2012 12:08:48 GMTHi my boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for about four months now, I recently discovered he was viewing online porn I'm very upset and don't like the idea of him doing that, what should I do leave or understandhttp://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29692http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29692Thu, 09 Feb 2012 11:07:02 GMTHello agony aunts, i really need help. Everyday is a struggle, i get treated like i'm nothing and i can't deal / cope with it anymore. I've tried talking to them about my problems, but it's now everyone. And didn't work anyway. Sometimes i feel i should not eat or run away, because i need to see who cares for me seriously and need some attention. what should i do? http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29691http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29691Thu, 09 Feb 2012 11:03:23 GMTThere's this girl in school who I feel sorry for as she has no friends and do I try to be nice to her, but recently she keeps following me everywhere and doing weird things for example: playing with my hair, asking of she wants to do my hw for me, complementing me all the time, asking if I want to copy in tests and trying to be cool and getting in trouble for it! How do i nicely get rid of her without being mean? Thanks http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29690http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29690Thu, 09 Feb 2012 10:33:45 GMTLong story short (ish) I used to be very popular and had friends everywhere but since my cousin and my partner had an argument she has turned them all against me. I went to a club with my cousin and one of my friends and we ended up meeting my cousins aunt in the club (shes 37). whilst my cousin and my friend were dancing I was sitting down just minding my own business when my cousins aunt comes up to me and started to cuss and shout at me about my relationship. She said that I shouldnt be with my partner because he has a child and he doesnt treat me as well as he should do. She said that because I cry to my friends about problems in my relationship I should just end it because im not emotionally mature enough (Im 19 and my partner is 24) When she told me all of this I was so mad. She has never met my partner and has made up these opinions about him based of obviously what my cousin has been telling her. I was extremely upset at the fact that I couldnt even vent about my relationship without everyone finding out and making wrong assumptions. Anyway after that I left the club with my cousin and friend and went home. When I got home I was still angry so I decided to tell my partner about what was said. Obviously to no ones surprise he was angry at the fact that he was being judged by people that dont even know him however instead of venting to me about it he decided to write about it on Facebook for all to see (including my cousin and her aunt). It ended up being a massive argument on Facebook and for some reason everyone turned against me. My boyfriend was mad at me because I didnt defend him on Facebook and my cousin and friends were mad because I didnt defend them. To be completely honest I just didnt want all of my business written on Facebook for everyone to see so I didnt write anything. Now my boyfriend and I are okay after working things out but I no longer have any friends. Ive known some of these girls all of my life and now they are gone due to an argument that didnt even include me. They think that im taking sides with my boyfriend which is not true but they refuse to listen. I just feel extremely depressed and down because I now have no social life. The only person I talk to now is my boyfriend because we live together but apart from that im so lonely. I hardly leave the house because I have nowhere to go and it just gets me down more. I have tried to make up with my friends but they dont want to know anymore including my cousin. I dont even go on Facebook and Twitter anymore because they sit there and talk about me all the time (sometimes indirectly but a majority of the time directly). All I do is sit at home and cry. Please help me because I cant take this anymore and I dont think my boyfriend can either. Please!http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29688http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29688Thu, 09 Feb 2012 08:53:32 GMTmy ex left 2month ago. he said he loves me and always will. he has not been in contact now for 5 weeks. why does he do this if he loves me.http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29687http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29687Thu, 09 Feb 2012 08:24:21 GMTi have been with my boyfreind for 2 years now .. and it has been great i love him and he loves me ... the probblam is i had a pair of leggans on and a belly top sataday and he was not happy when i come in from my freinds house , and stared to call me a tart and a slag i layed down on the bed with him after changing my top and he flung it in the bin .. and layed down ground rules that i had to follow i was very scared and dont know if this will carry on if i do follow the rules?http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29684http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29684Thu, 09 Feb 2012 08:05:41 GMTHi,i have been with my boyfreind 3 mounth and i dont think he is enjoying my sex ... but later today we had agument and he said i have to make it up to him with sex and it has to be amazing....how can i make it amazing sex is just sex to me ... help me how can i make sex better for him?http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29683http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29683Thu, 09 Feb 2012 07:46:43 GMTplease help! As i have no one to turn to... I am 27 and i will will hold my hands up and admit that i have never really valued money when i was younger, infact i have had several credit cards and loans in the past. At the time i didnt consider the consiquenses and didnt tell my parents about any of it as they dont belive in borrowing money. The years went by and i ended up in about 5 grand debt and went with a debt managment company. Now i am 27 i have a rubbish credit score and paying out alot of money out for bills every month, althoug i do have a good, full time job that i love. A year ago i met the love of my life whos financial state is completly opposite to mine, he is so carefull with his money and saves every month etc. My problem is that we want to get a house, and at the moment, we will need about 5-10 grand deposit. He is saving up every month and thinks i am doing the same but truth is... I cant! It would take me years to save up that kind of money and i do just want to get out of my parents house and start my own family asap. But im so lost! I dont want advise like "you need to tell your boyfriend" as i already know this and i am working on that part, i need some advice on how to save and get myself out of this situation that the younger, immature me got myself into! Renting is not an option and i cant talk to my parents about this as they dont know my situation. Its just a web i have weaved for myself that i cant get out of... Please help xxxx http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29682http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29682Thu, 09 Feb 2012 06:21:56 GMTi have been seeing my boyfriend for about a month now. he says he wants to take out realtion ship futher, but im not sure. hes more experienced than me and i dont want to do anything wrog. also i need some advice to make sure idontget pregnant and im scared what would hapen to us if anyone found out we were having sex. i dont want we were having sex, i dont want to ruin everything by telling him im not ready yet. what do you think i shoud do?http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29681http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29681Thu, 09 Feb 2012 04:20:04 GMTI stupidly started sleeping with an ex (I'm married, have kids) at my work...big health and hygiene no no as I'm a sous chef. She'd come in for a meal with friends, stayed for a few drinks after so we could catch up and one thing led to another. But that was months ago and it's still going on, I feel bad about it and keep on meaning to stop but it just happens. We'd been having sex in the kitchen and I thought the security camera would be switched off but it turns out it wasn't and everything has been caught. I thought I would lose my job but it was actually one of the lower staff who saw it all and removed the tape. He's now blackmailing me...worse than that he's blackmailing my ex too. She's now a successful business woman but as she deals only with women, her reputation is very important to her...if this gets out she'll be ruined, I'll be ruined, I'll lose my family and I'll probably get the crap kicked out of me by my ex's bf and since he's a bouncer I don't really fancy that much. This has made me take stock and reality has hit home. I love my wife and kids, I don't know what I was thinking getting mixed up with my ex, just thrill chasing I guess. But I don't want to lose my family. Can I go to the police about this without it getting back to my wife?http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29678http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29678Thu, 09 Feb 2012 02:23:23 GMTThis is a long story but I'm going to make it shorter (hopefully) Recently a friends aunt expressed her concerns about my relationship. She told me that I shouldn't be with my partner because he doesn't treat me right and I'm too young to be with someone that has a child from a previous relationship. When she told me this (out of the blue by the way) I was shocked and completely hurt because firstly this woman is 37 years old (I'm 19) and secondly it meant that my friend had been badmouthing me to her aunt because I would never have such a personal discussion with this woman. My partner and I do have our fair share of arguments (as does every relationship I presume) but never to the point where I should be worried about my wellbeing. I confronted my friend about this and she claimed that she didn't understand where her aunts opinions came from and I also told my partner as I was angry. When I look back and reflect on this whole situation I wish I never told him because got extremely upset and decided to vent on my wall on facebook for all to see including my friend and her aunt. After that things just went downhill and Its now got to the point where my friend had turned all of my other friends against me and have given me an ultimatumsemicolon him or them. I don't think I should have to choose but recently I have been feeling extremely depressed.. I have no one to talk to about my problems apart from my boyfriend (who I live with) and no one to even go out with and take my mind off of things with. Its gotten to the point where I hardly leave the house anymore because I don't have anything to do. I just stay in bed for a majority of the day either crying or reflecting on the situation. At first my boyfriend was really supportive and there for me but now I can see that my behaviour is getting to him too. I'm so scared that I am going to lose him too as I have my friends and I don't know what to do. I have tried to talk to my 'friends' but they refuse to have any contact with me. Instead they just talk about me on Facebook and Twitter in an indirect manner. I just don't know what to do anymore. I feel so depressed and lonely. Please help me! http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29671http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29671Wed, 08 Feb 2012 03:32:11 GMTI feel like I don't have any friends left and my social life is non existent. I am 22 and my best friend has been away travelling for a year. A few of my other close friends have had babies recently so obviously aren't out and about as much but everyone seems to be making new friends through work etc and are socialising with them. I often feel quite left out. I have a long-term boyfriend but he's not really into nights out and I just miss my girlies! http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29669http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29669Wed, 08 Feb 2012 03:18:20 GMTwell my best friend krissy is pregnant, she hasn't told her boyfriend,mum, dad or anyone bar me.... should i tell her mum or anyone else? i just want to help but our friendships means soo much to me. I have tried to tell to tell a adult or her sister. What should i do?http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29668http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29668Wed, 08 Feb 2012 02:45:48 GMTHi, I have been in my job for a few months since leaving university. I thought we got along well but then my boss deleted me off Facebook out of the blue and I am baffled as to what I have done. It is my dream job. My boss recently gave birth and I wondering if she is suffering from PND. Is behaviour like this a sign. I don’t know why I have been deleted deliberately. Some other things make me think she may have it as well. I am the only employee she has deleted and I’m really hurt as I want to get on well with her. http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29665http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29665Wed, 08 Feb 2012 10:02:06 GMTI really hope i dont come across as too much of a self-centered guy here, but i've changed so much and its really worrying me... Firstly, I'm fed up, fed up of school life, fed up of home life, fed up of friendships, relationships, work... everything, i'm skiving college (I'm 16) and i'm so behind on the work, but if i try to catch up i just get fed up of that too... I'm fed up of the fact that my friends dont seem to realize how i feel right now, and if i try to tell them they just tell me to grow up and deal with it, cos everyone has to do the same thing, but i cant find a way to tell them that i just cant deal with it anymore, almost every day i wonder whether if i just killed myself right then i could get away from life, i want to be an adult now, i want to be able to control my own life, but now i think i'll never be able to control my own life, and that just makes me want to die all the more. I have a boyfriend (I'm gay) but i'm in love with two other people, i'm fed up of not being able to break his heart by dumping him, or not being able to choose which of them i want to be with, or not being able to make any choice whatsoever alone! Secondly, i'm scared, scared that no other gay man in the world apart from my boyfriend wants to be in a long standing relationship, or want kids when their older, or want any of the same things i want to have when i am older, or even if they do that they'd never want it with me. I'm scared that even if i do feel differently to how i am now i've already messed my life up so much i wont be able to have what i want, scared because i dont even know what i want anymore, scared of disappointing people, but too scared to tell them i dont want to do what they want me to do, or what they think i can do. Lastly, i've noticed very recently that I've become incredibly selfish inside my head, not publicly yet (unless you count skiving), my boyfriend at the moment is very very ill, and i cant stop thinking "If he dies, i dont have to break up with him, and he can die happy then i can be happy with someone else", and i want to move out of my parents house, right now, everything they do, everything they say, it makes me want to yell at them, tell them they're doing it wrong, and even though i dont know the right way of doing it, to stop what they are doing, my mums got a mental disability and i just want to leave, which'd make her even worse, or kill myself, which'd probably kill her too... I dont know what to do, i just want to be happy, but i dont know how, i honestly believe if i moved out, that would be the first step, if i went to a different college where the teachers hadnt already judged me as a bad egg for missing all their lessons then things might get better, but i dont think that would change how i feel about my life, how i feel about wanting it to end... i dont know what else i can do, i tried going to see a CAHMs person, after an attempt on taking my own life about two years ago, but she thought i was fine after a few weeks (I cant TALK to people about these feelings, this is the only place i could collaborate them sufficiently) i tried seeing her again recently, but i had to get a reference from my GP, and I'm too scared of them judging me, saying i'm just a drama queen and dont need help and telling me to just grow up. I dont know what to do.http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29657http://www.problemexchange.com/problem.aspx?id=29657Wed, 08 Feb 2012 08:39:33 GMT