Pure & Lasting

For Her. {Guest Post by Tiffany Darling}

Jenn — Fri, 10 May 2013 19:43:47 +0000

I’d like to introduce you to a friend of mine, Tiffany. She and I are sisters of the heart, connected years ago through our journeys of adoption and further entwined by two big beautiful boys, who we call our sons. She followed our path to Alain and soon after, Habi, joined their family (To read his story, check out this post). She wrote about her children’s first mothers in such a beautiful way that I just HAD to share it with you. It is the story of my heart too. My ultimate blessing and privilege is to mother two amazing children who I did not give birth to. Their first mothers are so important in our family, so loved by all of us. I’ve said it before and I will say it again and again: Adoption is beautiful, but it is brokenness.
-Jenn

He is hers, and he is mine. He is ours. Her incredible loss was my incredible gift. And while I cannot imagine my world without him, poverty robbed her of life with him. There is not a single day that goes by that I do not realize this. It is a gut check every single morning. It makes for very complicated feelings in my heart. What if the roles were reversed? What if it was I who was there, struggling with starvation and preventable diseases, struggling with poverty and injustice squelching out my dreams? What if she was the one gifted with raising my children?

She is my link to his past, and we are eternally entwined. She is the only one who knows the way those first bumps, kicks, and wriggles felt inside of her swollen belly. And I am the one who knows the tears he cries for her, and how her pain is reflected in his heart. She knows the anguish of laboring him to life; while I know the anguish of laboring him here. She has all of his yesterdays, the ones I will never, ever know. I have all of his tomorrows, the ones she will never, ever know. She knows the dreams and prayers she breathed over his newborn face. She knows his first cry and first gasp for breath, and I wonder even in those first moments, if she knew that their time together was fleeting – flowing through her fingertips like fine grains of sand. I wonder if she breathed in his curls a little longer. I wonder if her tears came hot and fast as she wondered where the food would come from, and how she could feed herself in order to feed her son. I wonder if she was scared. I know her heart was breaking. I wonder if she held him tight to her chest and pleaded for his life.

With Jamesy’s first steps my heart soared and then peaked at the knowing that she was missing it. I squealed for both of us.

When Habi scored that first soccer goal for his school team, my eyes burned with tears. She wasn’t here to shake that cowbell and make a wild scene for our boy. So I did for both of us.

When the doctor told us Jamesy could see, rivers of scorching tears trickled the curves of my cheeks, and I begged God to let her know that our boy with the shaky gorgeous eyes could SEE.

When Habi’s blood tests all came out clear and negative, I wanted to dance with joy for her, knowing that she knew more than anyone in the world what a miracle that was.

With every new word that Jamesy gains, and every time his deep brown eyes find mine and he says Mama, my heart skips a beat, and I cherish it for both of us.

With every I love you, Mommy, I reassure Habi of my love and her love. Two women fiercely in love with the same boy.

Every time I tuck them in at night, stroke their curls, kiss their lids, I linger longer for her. Every milestone, accomplishment, late night talk, hug, kiss, kitchen dance, giggle is all soaked up for both of us. She is a part of them and a part of me. Two different Ethiopian women and then American me. Two brave, courageous women that poverty has stolen what was most precious to them. And while adoption is the most beautiful experience I have ever been inside of, it is also the most horrific and ugly as it is mottled with so much pain, so much loss, so much injustice. This is not how it should be. Poverty should not rob a child of its mother and a mother of its child, and while by the time I entered the picture for my boys it was too late, and the only thing left to do was what we did, for many children and mothers living in poverty, it is not too late. It is not too late to give these mommies the chance to experience first steps, first giggles, first day of school, bedtime kisses and prayers. It is not too late to allow a child to grow up in his or her beautiful culture and be adored by birth family and surrounded with love. As a mother to two birth children and two children born only in my heart, this is something I am passionate about. While adoption is viable and necessary in cases like my sons’, the best and most ideal situation is to keep children with their birth families when possible- despite poverty. Poverty is not a reason to separate families.

This Mother’s Day, rather than giving that special mother in your life flowers or jewelry, why not give them the gift of supporting mothers and children surrounded by poverty, so that they can stay and flourish together? It is as simple as making a one time donation to Compassion in honor of the special mom in your life, or partner with Compassion’s Child Survival Program in ongoing support. Jesus can offer these moms hope that life can be different. I want to be part of this difference.

My heart is for these mothers – these brave, beautiful, courageous mothers, who daily battle things that I could never dream of battling, all while I sit in my safe, comfortable home sipping coffee. Today I want you to think about these mothers – sisters across the world. What if it was you? Let’s link arms and fight for these women to have a chance to love their babies to adulthood. Let’s not close our eyes, turn our heads, and be silent.

Today I write this for her and for her. To Habi’s first mommy and to Jamesy’s first mommy – Happy Mother’s Day – you are forever in my heart. Every time I look into his eyes, I see you there. I love him for the both of us, and he will know of your love in my touch, in my words, and in my heart for him. This is for you and for you.

What I thought I knew…

Jenn — Thu, 09 May 2013 19:29:08 +0000

When we began our adoption process in 2010, there were many things I thought I knew about adoption. I am realizing I didn’t know anything at all. It has been 3 years since we applied to adopt from Ethiopia, in that time, my viewpoint of adoption has changed tremendously. When we filled out that first application, I understood that all of the paperwork required and regulations that make adoption expensive and lengthy were there to protect children, their families and the adoptive parents. I thought that I knew there were millions of children who needed a family. Millions. The numbers that are thrown around are HUGE. They are sad, but at the same time as a potential adoptive parent, they gave me comfort. Why would there be any need for corruption in the adoption process when there were so many more “orphaned” children than there were parents? I felt safe adopting from a country with a reported 4 million orphans, knowing that many of those 4 million would never be adopted.
The biggest misconception is the definition of an “orphan.” We see numbers like “147 Million Orphans” on T-shirts and blogs all the time, but how many of these children are orphans by the true definition and how many are actually adoptable? How many of the adoptable children are infants? According to UNICEF (which is where most “orphan” statistics come from), “Of the more than 132 million children classified as orphans, only 13 million have lost both parents. Evidence clearly shows that the vast majority of orphans are living with a surviving parent grandparent, or other family member. 95 per cent of all orphans are over the age of five.” By “orphan” they mean at least ONE parent is deceased. When I hear the word “orphan” I think a child without either parent, a child with no family. Most of the “orphans” in these statistics have one parent living and even those with both parents deceased have other in country options. I had NO idea! Before you quote a statistic be sure that you understand all of the terminology. When we started this journey towards adoption through Ethiopia, I had no idea how many children who were adopted have living family members in Ethiopia. I just didn’t know.
Realizing this makes a huge difference in our responses to help these vulnerable children. If there were truly over 147 million children with no family, no other options, adoption should be our first response to help. However because the vast majority of these children are living with a parent or other family member, it seems that our main focus and our strongest response should be family preservation. Supporting the economies of these countries, ministries that give job skills and education, sponsoring families to keep them together. Now that I know how many families are trying desperately to keep their children, my focus in advocating is not for adoption, but for finding ways to keep these vulnerable children with their families and in their countries.
The truth is a very small percentage of these “orphans” are adoptable and most of them are between the ages of 5 and 15. However, most of the children being adopted from Ethiopia to the USA and Europe are infants. What I am realizing is that so many (including us!) of the adoptive parents had the similar logic…If there are so many children who need families, it will do no harm if I request a healthy infant. I am beginning to understand that all of our requests have an effect on international adoptions. Adoptive parents are the funding behind the agencies. We are the voice. The children who need families are over 5 years old and the parents are requesting under 1 year of age. The huge statistics are motivating, but they are very misleading. The idea that there are millions of adoptable young children waiting in orphanages for families is the first misconception that leads adoptive parents down the path of good intentions which can lead to an unethical adoption. Yes, there are many children who need families, but there are far fewer than the numbers that are talked about in so many adoption related articles. This means that if your desire is to adopt an infant from Ethiopia whose in-country options have truly been exhausted, you have to WAIT. If an agency is promising a short wait time, there is something very wrong.
I’ve been to Ethiopia and Rwanda. With my own eyes, I’ve seen a thousand children living in orphanages. There are many children who need a family. There are many, many more who have a family who cannot care for them although they desperately want to. Many of the children living in orphanages are not adoptable. It is complicated. It is heartbreaking. Many of us want to help, but we need to make sure that we are truly helping. Potential adoptive parents do not have more of a right to a child than their actual parents. We must start from a place of truth, take the time to truly understand the situation before making ourselves the solution.
Before we throw ourselves into an adoption, we need to understand the culture of our child’s country. For many parents in Ethiopia and Rwanda (the only countries that I have been to), leaving their child under the care of an orphanage is a temporary solution to a desperate situation. They intend to return. Maybe in a week, maybe in a couple of years when they get back on their feet. When they put their child under the care of an “orphanage”, they still believe that child to be THEIR child. Fathers who have lost their wives during childbirth don’t know how to care for an infant and cannot breast-feed a starving child. They need to work. If there is not extended family to help, they come to an orphanage for help. Many come to visit their children as regularly as their job will allow. These children are not adoptable. They have a father who loves them. It is a situation that we will never find ourselves in and one that I cannot judge. Many of the countries that are open to international adoption have little to no social services. An “orphanage,” as we call it, is their only form of help. The local people know that most of the children living in an orphanage have living family.
We named our blog after James 1:27, which says: “Pure and lasting religion in the sight of God our Father means that we must care for orphans and widows in their troubles, and refuse to let the world corrupt us.” What stands out to me now more than ever is the “in their troubles” and “refuse to let the world corrupt us.” We have the responsibility to help people where they are, in real ways, with our eyes wide open to corruption surrounding them. We need to protect mothers, fathers, and children. This takes more time, more heartbreak, more work, but it is what is right.
  NOTE: This is not to say that am “anti-adoption”. There are SOME children who have no other option. However, there are many, many more families with children who are at risk of losing the ability either physically or financially of caring for their children. It isn’t that they don’t love their children or want their children. They need help or opportunity to provide for their families. In that way, I am against adoption, or I as would say it, I am FOR reducing the number of children and families who reach a point of desperation to feel that they have no other choice than to relinquish their children.

My must haves for cocooning & bonding. {Preparing to Adopt}

Jenn — Fri, 26 Apr 2013 19:39:34 +0000

Bonding and attaching with Maya was our priority. We wanted her to know that we were her parents and she could trust us. For the first 6 weeks of so, we were never our of her line of sight. I wanted to share my favorite products for cocooning, attachment parenting and bonding with you new little one.
1. A baby carrier. We used the Moby Wrap, but I’ve heard really good things about the Ergo as well. Baby wearing is a great way to create attachments with your child. We wore Maya almost constantly during our time in Ethiopia, in the airports during our trip home and when we arrived to greet our family. She spent a lot of time in the Moby during the first couple of months with us. Many naps were taken while in the Moby. I absolutely recommend using baby wearing as a part of your attachment plan.
2. A Parent Facing Stroller. Ours is the Maxi-Cosi Foray Stroller. We were fortunate to find it on Craig’s List soon after Maya came home. We LOVE it!! In those first few weeks when we weren’t taking Maya anywhere over-stimulating, it was so great to be able to take a walk. I highly recommend buying a parent-facing stroller to continue bonding with your child. Making eye-contact is huge in attachment. The stroller we have can be switched to face outward, but we plan to use it parent facing for as long as it makes sense. Maya can still see all around her and I can interact with her the entire time.
3. A Portable crib. I really wanted a side sleeper for Maya, but I couldn’t find anything that would fit her (not a newborn). We used this crib for the first 6-8 weeks after Maya was home. She slept in our room, right beside our bed. I loved that is was at the same height as our bed, so she was able to see us as soon as she woke up. The portable crib was an extra bonus because we could wheel it into the living room for naps during the day or play-time while we did another household task. Maya moves around quite a bit in her sleep, so after about 6 weeks she has been sleeping in the full-size crib in her room. She sleeps through the night and has done really well.
These are my favorites. Any other ideas?
-Jenn

Hanging out in her stroller on Halloween.

Yeah, what he said…

Jenn — Tue, 16 Apr 2013 20:05:03 +0000

I first discovered Micah when someone posted THIS awesome spoken word piece about “Normal Hair.” But this, oh this, is amazing. I have nothing to add. What he said. “Africa is not a damsel in distress and we are not her savior.”

Celebrating Easter.

Jenn — Thu, 11 Apr 2013 18:36:22 +0000

Happy Spring!!!! Last year, we were celebrating Alain’s first Easter with us and this year, it is Maya’s first. Firsts are always fun. Everything exciting and new. This year, however, one top of year full of firsts for Maya, we are celebrating a year full of seconds for Alain. With each approaching holiday, friend’s birthday party, or other seasonal activity, we can talk about the same time last year. Being a part of our memories, solidifies his place in our family. It was exciting for him to experience everything for the first time, but it is comforting to be a part of our traditions, to know what to expect, to be a part of the reminiscing. So here’s to first AND seconds!!!
-Jenn

Yay! A basket full of baby food fruit :)He has changed so much in a year!!! Such a handsome young man.Figuring out the cascarones with Daddy. It was warm enough for Maya to try out her pool for the first time. She was a bit wide-eyed with excitement :)Maybe not…She warmed up to the idea pretty quickly.

No one told me… {Preparing to adopt}

Jenn — Tue, 09 Apr 2013 16:18:38 +0000

A few weeks ago I had a conversation with a friend who had recently received her referral. The first thing she said to me was, “No one told me it would be so hard.” As soon as I heard the words, I realized she was right. Receiving your referral call is amazing, but there is more to it than that. It isn’t something that we talk about much. While it is true that adoption is beautiful, it is also brokenness and each life involved needs redemption. When we first started the adoption process, I thought it was clear cut. There are children who need families and we are a family who want children. What I am learning and accepting is that adoption is deeply complicated. Every person in this world has a story, things happen that are beyond our control, decisions are made, lies are told, truth is told, good intentions, bad intentions, pain, love, selfishness, selflessness. It is complicated.
All those months of waiting, you expect a flood of joy and nothing else on the day you get “the call.” The call makes it all real. No longer are you imagining your child, you can see their beautiful face. With your referral, you will begin to know their story. The same love that fills your heart with joy is the love the breaks your heart for the pain and loss in their little lives. My sweet friend could not bring herself to feel the full measure of joy because her heart was aching with each word she read of her child’s past. Your friends and family who have been waiting with you expect to see you dancing on Cloud 9. You are happy, but you cannot and should not forget the sacrifices, the difficulty that brought this child whose photo you are now staring at, your child, to a place where they needed a family. The pain that they have felt and the pain they will feel as they lose everything that they know in this world to join your family. It is joyful, but it is hard. Change is often hard, even as it is bringing healing. Nothing can prepare you for the moment that you really realize the child you have waited for, prayed for and loved has pain in their hearts, pain that you could not protect them from and pain that will always be a part of their story.
There are many days now that my heart and mind are filled with anguish at the reality that I have the amazing privilege of mothering these two precious lives instead of their mothers a world away. Each day, I get to kiss Maya’s soft cheeks and watch her grow. That is my joy. I love her more than I could have ever imagined. As I kiss her cheeks, I remember the one who brought her into this world and I grieve for her. For all she is missing. I grieve for Maya and the pieces of her life that are missing. One day, we will start having conversations with Maya about how she became our daughter and those conversations will be filled with smiles and tears. Joy and pain. But there is hope. There is a future. As her parents, we will have to walk her through moments of grief and loss along with all the good moments we get to be a part of. I will never understand every piece of her story. I think I am grieving for her now, so that in the future I will be better prepared to grieve with her. For both Alain and Maya, I pray that God will turn their broken pieces into joy and that in Chris and I can be a part of that healing.
As you are waiting, prepare your heart for the complexity of it all. Don’t put too much pressure on yourself or you family to feel any one way or another. Expect to feel a range of emotions both at the time of your referral and when you meet your child. Be encouraged that you aren’t alone.
-Jenn

Psalm 30:11-12:“You have turned my mourning into joyful dancing. You have taken away my clothes of mourning and clothed me with joy, that I might sing praises to you and not be silent.”

Big Miracle {Free Printable!}

Jenn — Tue, 26 Mar 2013 16:13:47 +0000

A while back, you know, before I had children to fill my every waking moment, I had time to do crafty things like sew dolls, decorate rooms and design blogs. While we were waiting for our referral, I was in full on nesting mode. I designed a printable for Maya’s room with a quote that I love: “Such a big miracle in such a little girl.” She is our miracle, our life changer, sunshine on a cloudy day and we are so blessed to call her ours. Funny thing is that I still haven’t found the perfect place in her room for it (I have an entire blank wall!), but I wanted to share it with you anyway. Maybe some of you will find a place in your little one’s room for it :) Scroll down below the photos of my sweet girl for free downloads of the print in several colors for girls and boys. The print is cropped to be an 8×10. Print it at home or send it in to your favorite place to get photos printed, frame and enjoy!!
-Jenn

Download Now.

Our Happy Saturdays.

Jenn — Sat, 09 Mar 2013 17:27:58 +0000

Life when you first come home with your child is CRAZY! Everyone is trying to find a new routine, sleep is not consistent and all things are new. Then one day, things settle down. Life is still crazy, but it is YOUR crazy beautiful life. I have moments when I just stare at Maya in pure amazement – that she is here, that she is so very beautiful and smart and funny, that she is ours. Almost two years ago, I posted THIS. Now, she is really here!!! Enjoying our happy Saturdays together. Maya, we love you so much and are so very blessed to be your parents. Happy Saturday from our family to yours!!
-Jenn

Change is gonna come…

Jenn — Wed, 06 Mar 2013 19:18:10 +0000

When we applied to adopt, I didn’t understand the statistics. Sure, I read them, but actually understanding what they meant in real life, how the numbers affected individual cases and the children, not really. In 1999, there were 42 adoptions from Ethiopia. In 2010, there were 2,511 adoptions processed (Statistic and other info about Ethiopian adoption, check out this link: US Department of State). I didn’t comprehend what these numbers meant and how they affect the system. The huge increase in adoptions made ensuring that all adoptions are processed ethically much more difficult, especially for a government with limited resources. For those of you starting out with the adoption process, I wanted to give you a break down of changes in the process to help give you a picture of why the wait-times have increased. Waiting isn’t always bad :)
In the early days of international adoption in Ethiopia, your agency was allowed to appear in Ethiopian court on your behalf. Meaning you were legally declared a child’s parent before meeting them. That has changed and here’s why…There were cases where, after meeting the child, adoptive (and already legal) parents decided not to bring the child home. They got scared, changed their mind, who knows. Adoptions in Ethiopia are irreversible, so those children were legally adopted, but with no family to care for them. The point is, the government was forced to add the second trip, in the hopes that children would not be left stranded and un-adoptable.
Rules are broken, so privileges are taken away or regulations become more stringent. In Ethiopian adoption, there were agencies pushing cases that were not by-the-books and adoptive parents not following through, leaving their legally adopted children stuck un-adoptable and without parents. Bending rules and breaking promises lead to more regulations and a slower process. Right now we are in the thick on the consequences of the brokenness and the repair. For all of the children in Ethiopia who truly need family, I pray that there will be restoration.  Agencies have continued to give “soft referrals” of children whose paperwork has not been verified. Parents lose referrals, request for further evidence are required, cases are even denied. As these cases wave red flags at the Ethiopia government or the US Embassy, changes in the process are necessary. Below is a rough breakdown of the changes in the Ethiopian adoption process over the last 2-3 years.

TIMELINE OF THE CHANGES IN ETHIOPIAN ADOPTIONS
-Families start to adopt from Ethiopia in small numbers per year.
-Ethiopia grows in popularity as a country to adopt from because of a relatively quick and inexpensive process.
-The number of families wanting to adopt from Ethiopia becomes overwhelming to the government
-More and more cases wave red flags to the Ethiopian court. Agencies are pushing questionable cases through. Parents are leaving children in Ethiopia. There is talk of corruption.
-The Ethiopian government begins to change requirements and policies in an attempt to keep international adoption open, but cut down on unethical practices and safe guard the children and birth families.
-The requirement of a second trip is added (Middle of 2010)
-The adoption process as a whole slows down in Ethiopia and the wait list for children (specifically young, healthy children) grows and grows.
-In March of 2011, the Department of State reported that Ethiopia’s Ministry of Women, Children, and Youth Affairs announced that it intended to decrease its processing rate from approximately 50 cases per day to five cases per day. rate from approximately 50 cases per day to five cases per day, effective March 10, 2011. While Ethiopia did slow down processing for a number of months after the announcement, USCIS understands that Ethiopia has since resumed a rate of adoption case processing similar to before the slow-down. (info from: HERE)
-Also in 2011, a few agencies are put under investigation and cannot process adoption during this time. The Ethiopian government revoked the licenses and closed several orphanages in the Southern Nations State. Further slowing the process.
-Several agencies stop accepting applications for young healthy children because their wait list has become extremely long and the adoption climate in Ethiopia is unsure.
-Towards the end of 2011, a significant number of cases that were deemed not “clearly approvable” are sent to the US Embassy in Nairobi. A statement from the US Embassy about that HERE: “In addition, the Embassy continues to see cases which involve abandoned children but do not include sufficient evidence to document the abandonment and/or evidence of appropriate efforts to locate a child’s birth family. The Embassy also has received evidence of unethical recruitment of children from birth relatives and cases involving known birth parents from whom parental rights have not been severed by the Ethiopian courts.”
-Agencies with less than stellar ethics, keep pushing on. They boast short wait times and young children. Parents caught in long lines, stop and take notice. When things were moving smoothly, the unethical agencies had a shorter wait time, but not much. As the wait time for the more ethical agencies lengthen, the agencies willing to cut corners stand.
-Most recently, the court process has been changed to require an approval letter from MOWCYA (Ministry of Women, Youth and Children Affairs) before giving the adoptive family a court date. When agencies do not do the proper paperwork/investigation of a case, their cases do not always receive this approval letter. Requiring the letter before court, will ensure that families who travel to Ethiopia will have MOWCYA’s approval before meeting their child. This will add a bit of time to the wait for the court date, but is a good step toward better ethics in the process.
-The Ethiopian government and the US Embassy, with stronger regulations, will continue to notice some of the cases without proper verification of orphan status. In the last couple of weeks, several agencies have closed their programs in Ethiopia. Hopefully this is a sign that unethical practices will not be tolerated. The government is working on re-licensing agencies now.

What do all these changes mean? Adoptive parents must be cautious and vigilant in defending the cause of the fatherless. Most importantly, we must be patient. Hopefully, all of these changes will result in a more ethical and streamlined process, but it will take time. Choosing who you trust is so important. For more on choosing an agency, check out this post.
-Jenn

FOR MORE INFORMATION:
From: www.AdoptionInstitute.org
REPORTS OF ABUSES LEAD TO CHANGES IN ETHIOPIA’S ADOPTION PROCESS
“Recent reports of fraud and corruption have caused concern about adoptions from Ethiopia among child welfare organizations and the U.S. State Department, reports Peter Heinlein in a December 14 VOANews.com article titled “Under Pressure, Ethiopia Plans Crackdown on Baby Business.” Earlier in the month, the State Department issued a statement cautioning prospective adoptive parents against “malfeasance and abuse” and announcing delays in the adoption process in an attempt to ensure that all adoptions are ethical and in the best interests of the child. Ethiopian officials report that they will close orphanages that only serve as “transit homes” en route to adoption, and re-accredit all foreign adoption agencies in an effort to impose higher ethical standards. To read the article, go to: http://bit.ly/eWXZWi. To read the State Department notice, go to http://bit.ly/bqj5wI and scroll down to December 6, 2010.”

From: www.voanews.com
“The rapid rise in Ethiopian adoptions has set off alarm bells among children’s lobby groups. The U.S. State Department issued a statement this month expressing concern about reports of adoption-related fraud, malfeasance and abuse in Ethiopia.”

From: Adoption.State.Gov
“Similarly, while it is important to be able to acquire the necessary documentation in any given adoption, it is more important to know how the orphanage comes by this information and how it operates on a daily basis. If an ASP contributes funds to an orphanage or relies on an affiliate to operate an orphanage on its behalf, the ASP needs to know where that money goes and ensure that it benefits the children. Moreover, ASPs need to ensure that the documentation about a child presented by an orphanage is a reflection of the true circumstances and not simply a document created to satisfy a request.”

From: MelissaFayGreene.com
“Perhaps because Ethiopia scaled up too quickly, corrupt middlemen entered the scene faster than the Ethiopian government officials were able to ward them off. This has happened previously in Romania, Guatemala, Cambodia, Nepal, Viet Nam, Ukraine — in most countries, really, where tens of thousands of dollars cross international borders in search of healthy babies, especially in search of healthy baby girls. In Ethiopia, the good intentions of many were tarnished by the greed of a few. Hearts were broken, lives were damaged: birth-parents unwittingly gave up their children forever, or adoptive parents fell in love with children not legally free for adoption. Records were falsified; ages were changed; health prospects were fictionalized; living birth-parents were portrayed as deceased; 11-year-olds were presented as 7-year-olds; young children were coached by their elders to lie, in order to facilitate unethical adoptions.”

From: TheAtlantic.com
“Ethiopia’s federal government is working to address problems in the country’s adoption system. But the adoption industry has become so lucrative and so strong, especially in rural parts of the country, that many people who’ve raised questions about the process say they’ve faced intimidation and harassment from the industry.”

Where did you get that shirt?!

Jenn — Mon, 04 Mar 2013 21:48:37 +0000

Quite often, I get asked where we purchased some of the shirts you see us wearing. We have a few favorites, so I thought I’d let you in on what we are wearing and where we got them :)
-Jenn

Alain’s all time FAVORITE shirt. Purchased here.I bought this one for Alain this past Christmas. You can get your own here.This shirt is from Live to Love apparel. Alain has this one and another and I have three myself. They are so cute. You can check them out here. And my new favorite shirt. This is the first one I put on after the laundry is finished. It is so comfy and cute. LOVE. Get one here.

And Chris’ favorite. He used to LIVE in this shirt. In fact, he has two :) Buy one here.