quotes book .. quotations to compete and inspire

Top 10 Quotes of 2007

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Tue, 8 Sep 2009 11:20:00 +0200

Top 10 Quotes taken from Time.com

#1. "I really am not the kind of guy that sits here and says, 'Oh gosh, I'm worried about my legacy.'"

— President GEORGE W. BUSH, when asked about his falling approval numbers and mounting criticism of the Iraq War during an interview with CBS' 60 Minutes (Jan. 14, 2007)

#2. "In Iran, we don't have homosexuals, like in your country."

— MAHMOUD AHMADINEJAD, president of Iran, responding to a question about the treatment of gays and lesbians in Iran during a visit to Columbia University in New York City (Sept. 24, 2007)

#3. "This record is not tainted at all. At all. Period.

— San Francisco Giants slugger BARRY BONDS, after breaking Hank Aaron's Major League Baseball all-time home-run record with his 756th career homer amid rampant speculation that he has used steroids. Bonds has always denied that he ever "knowingly" used performance-enhancing substances, but he was indicted in November for allegedly lying to a federal grand jury about using them (Aug. 7, 2007)

#4. "If you didn't like Darfur, you're going to hate Baghdad."

— Gen. DAVID H. PETRAEUS, warning of the consequences of an early troop withdrawal from Iraq (Aug. 14, 2007)

#5. "This is it. This is where it all ends. End of the road. What a life it was. Some life."

— Virginia Tech gunman CHO SEUNG-HUI, in a chilling video he made and sent to NBC News before killing 32 people and committing suicide in the deadliest school shooting in U.S. history (Apr. 16, 2007)

#6. "I don't think they're piling on because I'm a woman. I think they're piling on because I'm winning."

— HILLARY RODHAM CLINTON, on intensifying criticism by rivals for the Democratic presidential nomination (Nov. 2, 2007)

#7. "The planet is in distress and all of the attention is on Paris Hilton. We have to ask ourselves what is going on here?"

— AL GORE, in an interview with the British paper The Sun, before adding that he believes in 10 years it will be too late to save the planet (June 18, 2007)

#8. "I spent the better part of the past three months enduring criticism that is normally leveled at some kind of genocidal tyrant."

— RUPERT MURDOCH, News Corp. owner, on the outcry over his purchase of the Wall Street Journal (Aug. 8, 2007)

#9. "Hello, Condoleezza Rice? You have me to deal with now."

— A MASKED HAMAS GUNMAN, joking into the telephone of Palestinian President Mahmoud Abbas after taking control of his government compound (June 15, 2007)

#10. "Why don't you just shut up?"

— KING JUAN CARLOS, of Spain, to Hugo Chávez at a summit in Chile after the Venezuelan President called former Spanish Prime Minister José María Aznar a fascist (Nov. 10, 2007)

and by "you" we mean other people

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 01:11:00 +0200

Thanks to Jim who spotted this one this morning. Evidently, they may or may not come to you. Or somebody said that they do. Or something.

"Our Coffee"

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 01:11:00 +0200

Cafe Caribe
Supreme Selection
Coffee for the Latin Taste
"Our Coffee"

Our Coffee

I'm sure that it would become "My Coffee" if I purchased it. But for now it's "Their Coffee".
I found myself wishing that the words "Latin Taste" would have been in quotes.

"you" better be "careful"

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Tue, 16 Sep 2008 01:09:00 +0200

thanks to reader Joy who sent this one to me today. I usually try to avoid more than one post in a day, but this was too good and I was too impatient.

Joy adds these two things:
1. The sign is not for "me" or my "dog." Although I do have one.
2. My favorite part of the sign actually has nothing to do with the quotes but the clarification (which, it seems, is neccesary) that reads in tiny writing "yes. you."

I didn't see that second thing without Joy's help, and now I love it more. Killer.

two in one day? "crazy!"

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 00:20:00 +0200

frequent contributor Jon sends me a photo of this sheriff fan which says on the back "serving our community." Nicely spotted in downtown athens.

So, not really serving? not really a community? not really ours? All good questions...

actually you can use quarters also

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Fri, 12 Sep 2008 00:19:00 +0200

thanks to Alisa who found this one at Gypsy Hill Park duck pond. She says "I actually have no idea what they're trying to communicate to me with that message. " Me neither, Alisa.

maybe what they really mean is you can use other coins "only" if you call them "nickles."

(I'm jealous of Alisa for her experience which included unneccesary quotation marks AND ducks, two things of which I am very fond.)

I also have a question

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 22:31:00 +0200

I found this on crummy church signs

what's weird about this is there is a place where quotation marks WOULD be appropriate one line down. But it's not there. Maybe "Summit's Youth" are really asking, do you have good grammar? our church could use some direction...

"predictable"

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:50:00 +0200

I was browsing the lowercase L blog (a problem much more common than I initially guessed) and the proprietor there, William, posted this letter from Mark "Hollywood" Hatten about his potential paternity of Anna Nicole's young daughter.

I am somehow not surprised that this silliness includes punctuation errors.

The letter is littered with semi-amusing errors, including the eggregious lower-case l among upper-case letters. But it also includes "sperm sample" in questionable quotation marks. (Highlighted in a different color even). See below:

A classic case of quotation marks for emphasis, I'm sure. I'm trying to think of something funny to say that's not innapropriate, and I've got nothing. A little help, readers?

"you're ok"

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Wed, 10 Sep 2008 10:48:00 +0200

Also a good item for crummy church signs, I like the way this sign can be read as really cynical.
(thanks to Jim who took this picture in LA today)

Drive-Thru Gas Station

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Tue, 9 Sep 2008 14:50:00 +0200

Found on the way home for Christmas this year:

Have we developed in-drive fueling now?

I have a "game" to play...

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Tue, 9 Sep 2008 14:42:00 +0200

reader John posted this one in a comment. I'm not sure if the quotations signify a title here, and if that is grammatically kosher. However, I think we can all agree that the name of the coming store should be emphasized by a larger size, not by punctuation. Maybe the ineffectiveness of this sign is the reason the place closed down.

Maybe the place actually is entirely round - no corners at all! hence the quotation marks.... OR maybe the "games" are actually work. Like, hey kids, try this fun "game" called data entry!

(thanks John)

Drug Free America

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:19:00 +0200

Top 55 Tech Quotes

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:19:00 +0200

1. Cannot find REALITY.SYS. Universe halted.

2. COFFEE.EXE Missing - Insert Cup and Press Any Key

3. Buy a Pentium 586/90 so you can reboot faster.

4. 2 2 = 5 for extremely large values of 2.

5. Computers make very fast, very accurate mistakes.

6. Computers are not intelligent. They only think they are.

7. My software never has bugs. It just develops random features.

8. C:WINDOWS C:WINDOWSGO C:PCCRAWL

9. C:DOS C:DOSRUN RUNDOSRUN

10. -{----- The information went data way --------[

11. Best file compression around: "DEL ." = 100% compression

12. The Definition of an Upgrade: Take old bugs out, put new ones in.

13. BREAKFAST.COM Halted...Cereal Port Not Responding

14. The name is Baud......, James Baud.

15. BUFFERS=20 FILES=15 2nd down, 4th quarter, 5 yards to go!

16. Access denied--nah nah na nah nah!

17. C: Bad command or file name! Go stand in the corner.

18. Bad command. Bad, bad command! Sit! Stay! Staaay..

19. Why doesn't DOS ever say "EXCELLENT command or filename!"

20. As a computer, I find your faith in technology amusing.

21. Southern DOS: Y'all reckon? (Yep/Nope)

22. Backups? We don' NEED no steenking backups.

23. E Pluribus Modem

24. ... File not found. Should I fake it? (Y/N)

25. Ethernet (n): something used to catch the Etherbunny

26. A mainframe: The biggest PC peripheral available.

27. An error? Impossible! My modem is error correcting.

28. CONGRESS.SYS Corrupted: Re-boot Washington D.C. (Y/n)?

29. Does fuzzy logic tickle?

30. A computer's attention span is as long as it's power cord.

31. 11th commandment - Covet not thy neighbor's Pentium.

32. 24 hours in a day...24 beers in a case...coincidence?

33. Disinformation is not as good as datinformation.

34. Windows: Just another pane in the glass.

35. SENILE.COM found . . . Out Of Memory . . .

36. Who's General Failure & why is he reading my disk?

37. Ultimate office automation: networked coffee.

38. RAM disk is not an installation procedure.

39. Shell to DOS...Come in DOS, do you copy? Shell to DOS...

40. All computers wait at the same speed.

41. DEFINITION: Computer - A device designed to speed and automate errors.

42. Go ahead, make my data!

43. Smash forehead on keyboard to continue.....

44. Enter any 11-digit prime number to continue...

45. ASCII stupid question, get a stupid ANSI!

46. E-mail returned to sender -- insufficient voltage.

47. Help! I'm modeming... and I can't hang up!!!

48. All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound?

49. Error: Keyboard not attached. Press F1 to continue.

50. "640K ought to be enough for anybody." - Bill Gates, 1981

51. DOS Tip #17: Add DEVICE=FNGRCROS.SYS to CONFIG.SYS

52. Hidden DOS secret: add BUGS=OFF to your CONFIG.SYS

53. Press any key to continue or any other key to quit...

54. Press any key...... no, No, NO!! Not THAT one!

55. Press CTRL-ALT-DEL to continue ...

Best Love Story in Three Pictures

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:15:00 +0200

101 Greatest Quotes from George Carlin

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:14:00 +0200

1. I don’t have pet peeves — I have major psychotic fucking hatreds!

2. Think of how stupid the average person is, and realize half of them are stupider than that.

3. Swimming is not a sport. Swimming is a way to keep from drowning. That’s just common sense!

4. A house is just a place to keep your stuff while you go out and get more stuff.

5. Have you ever noticed that their stuff is shit and your shit is stuff?

6. I wanna live. I don’t wanna die. That’s the whole meaning of life: Not dying! I figured that shit out by myself in the third grade.

7. I used to be Irish Catholic. Now I’m an American — you know, you grow.

8. You can’t fight City Hall, but you can goddamn sure blow it up.

9. If the Cincinnati Reds were really the first major league baseball team, who did they play?

10. Honesty may be the best policy, but it’s important to remember that apparently, by elimination, dishonesty is the second-best policy.

11. If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say that the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.

12. No one knows what’s next, but everybody does it.

13. There are 400,000 words in the English language, and there are seven you can’t say on television. What a ratio that is! 399,993 to 7. They must really be baaaad. They must be OUTRAGEOUS to be separated from a group that large. “All of you words over here, you seven….baaaad words.” That’s what they told us, right? …You know the seven, don’t ya? That you can’t say on TV? Shit, piss, fuck, cunt, cocksucker, motherfucker and tits.

14. The very existence of flamethrowers proves that sometime, somewhere, someone said to themselves, “You know, I want to set those people over there on fire, but I’m just not close enough to get the job done.”

15. The reason I talk to myself is because I’m the only one whose answers I accept.

16. Just when I discovered the meaning of life, they changed it.

17. Religion has convinced people that there’s an invisible man…living in the sky, who watches everything you do every minute of every day. And the invisible man has a list of ten specific things he doesn’t want you to do. And if you do any of these things, he will send you to a special place, of burning and fire and smoke and torture and anguish for you to live forever, and suffer and burn and scream until the end of time. But he loves you. He loves you and he needs money.

18. Weather forecast for tonight: Dark. Continued dark overnight, with widely scattered light by morning.

19. If it requires a uniform, it’s a worthless endeavor.

20. If you live long enough, sooner or later everybody you know has cancer.

21. You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans.

22. Soft rock music isn’t rock, and it ain’t music. It’s just soft.

23. Reminds me of something my third-grade teacher said to us. She said, “You show me a tropical fruit and I’ll show you a cocksucker from Guatemala.”

24. As soon as someone is identified as an unsung hero, he no longer is.

25. If a movie is described as a romantic comedy, you can usually find me next door playing pinball.

26. The IQ and the life expectancy of the average American recently passed each other in opposite directions.

27. I knew a transsexual guy whose only ambition is to eat, drink, and be Mary.

28. I put a dollar in a change machine. Nothing changed.

29. If you’ve got a cat and a leg, you’ve got a happy cat. If you’ve got a cat and two legs, you’ve got a party.

30. You can prick your finger — just don’t finger your prick.

31. By and large, language is a tool for concealing the truth.

32. Ever notice that anyone going slower than you is an idiot, but anyone going faster is a maniac?

33. Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?

34. I don’t like to think of laws as rules you have to follow, but more as suggestions.

35. I think it’s the duty of the comedian to find out where the line is drawn and cross it deliberately.

36. When you’re born you get a ticket to the freak show. When you’re born in America, you get a front-row seat.

37. Eventually, alas, I realized the main purpose of buying cocaine is to run out of it.

38. I never fucked a ten, but one night, I fucked five twos.

39. I never joined the Boy Scouts. I don’t trust any organization that has a handbook.

40. I would never want to be a member of a group whose symbol was a man nailed to two pieces of wood.

41. Have you noticed that most of the women who are against abortion are women you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place? There’s such balance in nature.

42. So I say, “Live and let live.” That’s my motto. “Live and let live.” Anyone who can’t go along with that, take him outside and shoot the motherfucker. It’s a simple philosophy, but it’s always worked in our family.

43. Catholic — which I was until I reached the age of reason.

44. Here’s a bumper sticker I’d like to see: “We are the proud parents of a child who’s self-esteem is sufficient that he doesn’t need us promoting his minor scholastic achievements on the back of our car.”

45. I love and treasure individuals as I meet them; I loathe and despise the groups they identify with and belong to.

46. Beethoven was so hard of hearing, he thought he was a painter.

47. Don Ho can sign autographs 3.4 times faster than Efrem Zimbalist Jr.

48. God bless the homicidal maniacs. They make life worthwhile.

49. I’ve never seen a homeless guy with a bottle of Gatorade.

50. One great thing about getting old is that you can get out of all sorts of social obligations just by saying you’re too tired.

51. If Helen Keller had psychic ability, would you say she had a fourth sense?

52. What year did Jesus think it was?

53. George Washington’s brother, Lawrence, was the Uncle of Our Country.

54. Have you ever wondered why Republicans are so interested in encouraging people to volunteer in their communities? It’s because volunteers work for no pay. Republicans have been trying to get people to work for no pay for a long time.

55. In America, anyone can become president. That’s the problem.

56. Once you leave the womb, conservatives don’t care about you until you reach military age. Then you’re just what they’re looking for. Conservatives want live babies so they can raise them to be dead soldiers.

57. “One thing leads to another”? Not always. Sometimes one thing leads to the same thing. Ask an addict.

58. No one who has had “Taps” played for them has ever been able to hear it.

59. Property is theft. Nobody “owns” anything. When you die, it all stays here.

60. The best thing about living at the water’s edge: You only have assholes on three sides of you, and if they come this way you can hear them splash.

61. The future will soon be a thing of the past.

62. The planet is fine. The people are fucked.

63. The real reason that we can’t have the Ten Commandments in a courthouse: You cannot post “Thou shalt not steal,” “Thou shalt not commit adultery,” and “Thou shalt not lie” in a building full of lawyers, judges, and politicians. It creates a hostile work environment.

64. Boxing is a more sophisticated form of hockey.

65. The only good thing ever to come out of religion was the music.

66. I think everyone should treat one another in a Christian manner. I will not, however, be responsible for the consequences.

67. Bowling is not a sport because you have to rent the shoes.

68. “When Will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?” This title offends all three major religions, and even vegetarians!

69. Thou shalt keep thy religion to thyself.

70. And now, in the interest of equal time, here is a message from the National Institute of Pancakes: It reads, and I quote, “Fuck waffles.”

71. Atheism is a non-prophet organization.

72. Whoever coined the term “Buyer Beware” was probably bleeding from the asshole.

73. Cloud nine gets all the publicity, but cloud eight actually is cheaper, less crowded, and has a better view.

74. Have you ever noticed that the lawyer always smiles more than the client?

75. I’m always relieved when someone is delivering a eulogy and I realize I’m listening to it.

76. Just think, right now as you read this, some guy somewhere is gettin’ ready to hang himself.

77. The reason they call it the American Dream is because you have to be asleep to believe it.

78. If all our national holidays were observed on Wednesdays, we could wind up with nine-day weekends.

79. “Meow” means “woof” in cat.

80. Most people with low self-esteem have earned it.

81. Most people work just hard enough not to get fired and get paid just enough money not to quit.

82. “No comment” is a comment.

83. If a man smiles all the time, he’s probably selling something that doesn’t work.

84. You can’t argue with a good blowjob.

85. Most of the time people feel okay. Probably it’s because at the moment they’re not actually dying.

86. So far, this is the oldest I’ve been.

87. Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink, I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck.

88. Do you think Sammy Davis ate Junior Mints?

89. When you think about it, attention-deficit order makes a lot of sense. In this country there isn’t a lot worth paying attention to.

90. The Golden Gate Bridge should have a long bungee cord for people who aren’t quite ready to commit suicide but want to get in a little practice.

91. I think I am, therefore, I am. I think.

92. If the cops didn’t see it, I didn’t do it!

93. Hooray for most things!

94. Capitalism tries for a delicate balance: It attempts to work things out so that everyone gets just enough stuff to keep them from getting violent and trying to take other people’s stuff.

95. I don’t have a fear of heights. I do, however, have a fear of falling from heights.

96. What was the best thing before sliced bread?

97. May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.

98. Life is a zero sum game.

99. Somehow I enjoy watching people suffer.

100. I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it.

101. It isn’t fair: the caterpillar does all the work, and the butterfly gets all the glory

Mike Gravel on The Colbert Report

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:13:00 +0200

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Top 10 Love Quotes

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:12:00 +0200

10) Passionate love is a quenchless thirst.
Quote by Kahlil Gibran.

9) Love is like pi -- natural, irrational, and very important.
Quote by Lisa Hoffman.

8) Time is too slow for those who wait,
too swift for those who fear,
too long for those who grieve,
too short for those who rejoice,
but for those who love,
time is eternity.
- Quotes by Henry Van Dyke.

7)Love is a canvas furnished by Nature
and embroidered by imagination.
- Love Quotes by Voltaire.

6) Love is an energy - it can neither be created
nor destroyed. It just is and always will be,
giving meaning to life and direction to goodness...
Love will never die.
Quotes by Bryce Courtney.

5) Being deeply loved by someone gives you strength
while loving someone deeply gives you courage.
Quotes by Lao-Tsu.

4) Tell me who admires and loves you,
And I will tell you who you are.

3) Nothing worth doing is completed in our lifetime,
Therefore, we are saved by hope.
Nothing true or beautiful or good makes complete sense in any immediate context of history;
Therefore, we are saved by faith.
Nothing we do, however virtuous, can be accomplished alone.
Therefore, we are saved by love.
No virtuous act is quite a virtuous from the standpoint of our friend or foe as from our own;
Therefore, we are saved by the final form of love which is forgiveness.

2) You know quite well, deep within you, that there is only a single magic, a single power, a single salvation...and that is called loving. Well, then, love your suffering. Do not resist it, do not flee from it. It is your aversion that hurts, nothing else.
- Hermann Hesse Famous Love Quotes

1) I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge -- myth is more potent than history -- dreams are more powerful than facts -- hope always triumphs over experience -- laughter is the cure for grief -- love is stronger than death.
- Robert Fulghum

Chris Rock Quotes

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:11:00 +0200

When LIFE asked comic Chris Rock if America is ready for an African American president, Rock tells LIFE:

"It's ready for a retarded president, why wouldn't it be ready for an African American president?"

Success Quotes - Motivational, Inspirational

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:05:00 +0200

WHAT IS SUCCESS?

To laugh often and much;
To win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children;
To earn the appreciation of honest critics
and endure the betrayal of false friends;
To appreciate beauty;
To find the best in others;
To leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child
a garden patch or a redeemed social condition;
To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived;
This is to have succeeded.

—Ralph Waldo Emerson quotes

Four More Years?

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:04:00 +0200

Whats the Difference?

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:02:00 +0200

Barack Obama - Lincoln

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:02:00 +0200

Health Advice ;)

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 11:00:00 +0200

my favorite sign

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 10:54:00 +0200

this isn't quotation marks, but I just love this sign. It's in a classroom where I spend a fair amount of time. It's like they consulted the fire or something. Awesome

at the zoo

noreply@blogger.com (karimelnabawy) — Mon, 8 Sep 2008 10:53:00 +0200

while we were at the zoo in Columbia SC, my friend Sonya posed with this sign: