It is now official that our attention span is LESS than the attention span of a goldfish!

I heard this statistic while listening to Sally Hogshead talk about the subject of Fascination and how we can capture that limited attention span.  While as a business owner I continue to work hard to learn how to capture people’s attention so I have the opportunity to actually make a difference with them, I couldn’t help but think about the implications of this alarming statistic for my life.

We are bombarded daily with a staggering amount of information.  If I printed my daily e-mails for a month I would probably be classified as a hoarder. Sure there are the spammers, but most of that information I have invited into my inbox in one way or another. There is literally a stack of books on my nightstand (and in my Kindle reader) that seems to grow much faster than it shrinks.

Truth be told I love all that input, including my beloved social media streams, most especially twitter.

But is it really a problem?  Said more personally, do I have a problem?

Have I unwittingly become an input junkie?  I don’t have an answer to that just yet, although I can say I am taking a very honest look in the mirror.

My thinking so far has led me to one conclusion though:

The difference between being an input junkie and having a big appetite for information lies in what I do with the input.  If all I do is read, watch and listen without taking action based on all of that input then I am wasting my time.

Brendan Burchard suggests that if you want to be productive and effective you need to be the driver of your day, rather than let the outside world “run the show” so to speak.  He recommends that, rather than taking in input at the start of your day in the form of signing onto social media, reading e-mail, etc., if you want to be productive and effective you must start your day declaring what you must accomplish and who you must contact.

It occurs to me that if I can apply that approach to all of the input I am both bombarded with and seek daily, I may not quell the massive inflow, but I will make much better choices about what I allow in.  That way I can ensure I have the time and focus essential to take the action required to fulfill on my goals and aspirations.

What about you – are you an input junkie?

What strategies can you offer for dealing with the massive flow of information inevitable in today’s world?

Image credit: sangoiri / 123RF Stock Photo

On May 1, 2013 a man named Wally Collins passed away.  A few short years ago I sang at his wedding as he married one of the people I hold most dear, Mary McClean.  They shared a brief, but beautiful love.  It was moving to witness.  Wally fought hard to stay on this earth to be with Mary and his family as long as possible.  He defied the odds over and over right until the end.

As I sat down on Sunday to prepare the songs his family had asked me to sing at his funeral, a very rare thing happened.  You see long ago I played in the occasional coffee house and have even written a few songs.  The last time I was that inspired to write a song was 13 years ago when my daughter was born.  This time I literally had to dust off my guitar to prepare, and as I did inspiration struck.  Within an hour a new song poured out of me.

I had known Wally for only 4 of his 89 years.  He had been quite ill through most of that time which is why I say I barely knew him.  Yet somehow he had touched my life deeply.

As I listened to the stories told by the generations of people whose lives Wally had touched and guided, I was no longer surprised by the deep effect he had on me.  He was clearly the patriarch of his family – a benevolent, loving, and kind servant.  He was clearly a leader who left a remarkable imprint on the lives he touched that can be summed up in one word: love.

He left a legacy in many respects, but the one I want to highlight here is his emotional legacy.  It was the way he made people feel in his presence and about themselves that is perhaps the most important legacy of his life.  It was in the simplest of gestures that he continued to find a way to let those around him know they were loved and that they truly mattered.

Wally demonstrated leadership in simple actions, every day throughout his life.   What legacy will you leave through your actions today?

P.S.  Here is the song I wrote in memory of my friend Wally.  Thank you, Wally, for reminding me that love lives forever.

Why does there so often seem to be such a big gap between theory and action?

I’ll suggest it is because to apply the theory we have to first change the way we think.  Just because a concept makes sense to us intellectually, doesn’t mean we have embraced the new thinking or beliefs and integrated them into our mindset.

Your thoughts, which are always based on your personal context, mental models, beliefs, etc., are the source of all of your actions.  Change the way you think and you will change the way you act.

It makes sense, doesn’t it?  Ironically, if I just stop there this concept easily become just another one of those things that “sounds great in theory”.

The only way it won’t is to take action to test it out.  It is only when you take action that you can begin to observe the gap between what you think you know and understand and what you actually know.

I was reminded of this while trying to lose weight over the last year.  I discovered that knowing how to eat healthy and how to eat to lose weight were not the same thing.  I had thought healthy eating would result in weight loss.  The scale proved otherwise.  Yet it wasn’t until I committed to losing weight and was failing at it that I could discover the flaws in my thinking.  I really thought I knew what I needed to do.  Clearly I didn’t.

Why did I believe I knew how to lose weight?  Because what I thought I already knew had worked for me before.  It was only when I came face to face with the gap between my current reality and my desired reality that I could see I now had more to learn.

So the next time you read something that sounds good in theory, take action and test it out.  It is the only way to learn how to apply that theory in real life.

The key, however, is to take action in service of a heartfelt commitment to a specific outcome.  Because if you don’t have a specific outcome you are working towards, it will be hard to clearly see the gap between your desired reality and your current reality.  You will also risk too quickly drawing a false conclusion that the theory doesn’t work.

In fact, it probably won’t work unless you are willing to do the hard work of changing your thinking so it can work.

What theory are you willing to put to the test?

If I were to put you in a completely dark room and you had no idea where the door was, how would you find the door?

You would have to take a step, and adjust for your next step given the “feedback”, wouldn’t you?  You would probably bump into things.  You may even get a few bruises.  You might feel uncomfortable or scared and perhaps get frustrated, too. 

It is likely you would have to change course a few times just to find your way to a wall, let alone the door.  

Of course, eventually, with enough trial, error, and discovery you would find your way to that door.

Learning to lead or elevating your leadership to the next level can feel a lot like being in that dark room. 

You may have gotten to where you are based on who you have been, what you know and what you have contributed so far.  But to get to whatever the next level is for you, you must travel through inherently unfamiliar territory.

You can wait for someone to turn the proverbial lights on: to learn enough, know enough or be certain enough to have confidence in taking that next step.  Or you can mindfully choose a next step and see what happens.  Sure you may metaphorically bump into things or fall down.   The alternative, however, is to stand still, wait and hope.

“I hear and I forget. I see and I remember. I do and I understand.” Confucious

Leadership requires action.  There is no way around it.  You must act and then respond given the feedback from the world around you.  This is the only way to turn the lights of real learning and growth on inside of you.  It is only by taking action that we can truly understand what it means to be a leader.

Besides, one of the best ways to lead people out of their comfort zone is to get out of your own.

What action will you take today to take a step forward in growing as a leader?

Have you ever been frustrated by a conversation (or a series of them!) that seems to go nowhere no matter how hard you try?

Progress can be illusive at best when two or more people are in a conversation in which they are not committed to the same outcome.  Yet even when you are seemingly on the same page about the purpose of a conversation, it can still be difficult when you encounter someone who is like a magician making clarity, focus and progress evaporate in an instant.

These conversational magicians are masterful with the communication equivalent of smoke and mirrors in creating the illusion that a real conversation is going on.

Sometimes it is intentional.  It could be they have an agenda that runs counter to yours or simply something they do not want revealed.  In the worst of cases there could be something untoward going on.

Other times it is simply a lack of consciousness about how they are getting in the way of progress.  It could also be a lack of willingness or weak ability to remain focused on the topic at hand.  No matter what the cause may be though, when you encounter one of these magicians, there are things you can do to turn things around and cause a breakthrough in progress.

The key lies in how well you prepare for the next conversation.

Here are 3 things you must do to prepare to have a productive and satisfying conversation.

1.  Get Focused on a Specific Outcome

Focus on why you need to have a conversation – not in terms of a reason, but rather in terms of an end result.  What do you want the outcome of your next conversation to be that would have you feel satisfied.   Is there a decision that needs to be made?  Is there something you need to understand better or information you need that you have not been able to acquire?  Is there something you want someone to do as a result?  If so, prepare your request in advance.

A great way to ensure progress is to be clear about what would need to happen next, after the meeting, to ensure you don’t just talk about progress, but actually make progress in reality.

2.  Get Clear About the Topics You Think Need to be Covered to Deliver on that Specific Outcome

Until you are absolutely clear about what you think you need to discuss, consider you are not sufficiently prepared.  With conversational magicians there is no room for muddled thinking or speaking.  You must get crystal clear for yourself ahead of time.  Of course others in the conversation may see other topics to discuss to deliver on the outcome.  That is why #1 is so critical.  Your job is to ensure every topic directly correlates to the specific outcome at hand.  Also, knowing what you think the key topics are ahead of time helps ensure you don’t get sidetracked.

Remember, conversational magicians are by their nature difficult to corral so you must stay clear and focused throughout!

3,  Simplify Even More

Whatever you have written down so far, try getting even simpler.  A great practice is to try stating your outcome and each of your key topics in 140 characters or less.  (That is the length of a tweet in case you are wondering.  Tweeting, by the way, is great practice, for learning the art of brevity.)

Now if you would rather not write #1 and #2 down, think again.  It is far too easy to think you are clear when you are mulling things over in your own mind.  Writing down your intended outcome and the key topics will test just how clear you really are.

It doesn’t matter whether there is 1 other person involved or 20, these same things are essential to ensure you engage in consistently productive and satisfying conversations.

Every one of these steps may seem simple, but they are not always easy.  It takes hard work to get clear, stay focused and simplify.  Warning: failure to do the work to prepare may result in you unwittingly becoming one of those conversational magicians yourself.

The good news is the more you practice the easier it will get. You may even find it helps even the best of interactions to be even more productive and satisfying that ever.

What strategies do you use to get past conversational smoke and mirrors?