tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987Tue, 13 Sep 2011 11:56:45 +0000Drunk residentsNon-tradsYou tell meMailbagResident IssuesCrimeBossesPotheadsPsycho residentsPranksFloor ProgramsSecurityReader StoriesAnnouncementsDrugsStupid residentsDouchebagSeriousGetting laidFightsOff topicSlutty residentsBookNot funnyFunnyAn anonymous RA from Maine tells some amusing stories about being an RAhttp://ratales.blogspot.com/noreply@blogger.com (Mike C)Blogger112125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-4419798774255072207Sat, 27 Jun 2009 14:39:00 +00002009-06-27T10:43:14.221-04:00BookSorry to those of you who have written to me and Mike about not being able to order the book from Amazon. They've finally fixed the error and you can now order it new or used and it's even eligible for free shipping if your total order is more than $25! And it's available on the Kindle!Bad Little FallI'll be back in the fall to talk more about my Summer of Booze and Boobs.http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/06/amazon-finally-fixed-max-carter-book.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-947649260423268854Tue, 26 May 2009 00:35:00 +00002009-05-25T20:36:17.506-04:00BookCheck out Bad Little Fall. It's totally worth it. And Amazon discounted it!http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/05/bad-little-fall-finally-available-on.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-557410176141638704Wed, 06 May 2009 00:20:00 +00002009-05-05T20:38:44.491-04:00PranksI've been promising it for weeks while I neglect my blog, but here it is. Just in time for summer.My coup de grace.My sister is pregnant and was talking at dinner recently about the pregnancy test and how sensitive she was about taking it. She didn't want to tell her husband until she was absolutely sure. She didn't want to alarm him.I, on the other hand, am all about alarming people. And I had http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/05/grand-finale.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-8765299277144955055Sat, 25 Apr 2009 02:26:00 +00002009-04-24T22:27:34.099-04:00AnnouncementsSorry about going MIA. I am on sabbatical for a few more days. But don't worry, I have an absolutely historic prank to write about before summer break. You will not be disappointed.http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/im-still-here.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-2093698295937768403Thu, 23 Apr 2009 01:59:00 +00002009-04-22T22:15:13.577-04:00BookMike asked me to tell you that the first review has shown up on his book, and it's really good! Good thing his mom decided to post something nice. Mike also tells me that he's received several very positive e-mails from people about the book. The prevailing opinion is that it's a great story with a surprising ending. Remember that you can buy the book in paperback or e-book format. Anyway, here'shttp://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/first-review-of-bad-little-fall.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-5802292140115682146Tue, 21 Apr 2009 00:26:00 +00002009-04-20T20:26:48.883-04:00http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/this-guy-has-iq-of-straw.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-4159843458430432214Sat, 18 Apr 2009 18:48:00 +00002009-04-18T15:07:56.246-04:00PranksBy now you've probably read my stories of waking my residents up with hidden alarm clocks and about waking my professor up with a late-night call. Well I like to learn from past pranks and then make improvements. This one is subtle but key.I have a friend who claims that he wakes up when the sun shines through his curtain every day. He doesn't require an alarm clock. I've heard him talk about it http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/recycling-old-prank-with-improvements.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-1331727940350363732Sun, 12 Apr 2009 23:16:00 +00002009-04-12T19:34:02.114-04:00Resident IssuesThe other day I posted about my residents who do not practice personal hygiene. We actually had a floor meeting without them today and discussed what to do.Someone suggested paying a hot girl to offer to shower with them and wash them. Honestly, it probably wouldn't take a very attractive girl. Maybe a 3 or 4 on a scale of 10. But that's not gonna happen.The third comment on the post was deleted http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/readers-have-spoken-and-resident-has.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-2043450204996792572Fri, 10 Apr 2009 01:36:00 +00002009-04-09T21:42:44.593-04:00Resident IssuesPranksI have two residents who live together who choose to forgo the shower. Daily. I mean, they never shower. Ever.I don't think they showered during fall semester, then they showered at home over Christmas break, and now they haven't showered since.They stink so badly that you can walk past their closed room and it makes you gag. If you go in their room, you need to take a shower and burn your http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/what-do-you-do-with-stinky-resident.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-671058245901562629Wed, 08 Apr 2009 01:56:00 +00002009-04-07T21:58:20.146-04:00BookAnnouncementsI just received the call from Mike: Bad Little Fall, the Max Carter book, is AVAILABLE for purchase!! Check it out here:http://stores.lulu.com/mikecolucciIt's available in e-book format and paperback and you can read the first 10 pages right there on the site. It will be available on Amazon and other major retailers soon!http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/big-news-bad-little-fall-is-available.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-3218751715778930611Mon, 06 Apr 2009 22:32:00 +00002009-04-06T18:36:19.707-04:00PranksThis weekend I wrote about the professor I called at 3am to tell him he was late for class. This morning, he not only mentioned the call, but he laughed at it and thought it was "brilliant." Here's what he said when he walked in (paraphrased):"Someone called me in the middle of the night this weekend and convinced me I was late for class. Since this is my only early morning class, I know it was http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/update-late-professor-has-sense-of.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-432098919129611205Sun, 05 Apr 2009 01:30:00 +00002009-04-04T21:46:15.624-04:00PranksWhile I think my pranks are almost universally enjoyed, I've never taken them to the classroom. A faculty member has never been the subject of one of my pranks. Until now.There's a professor that everyone hates. Let's call him Dr. Handsy. He's a pervert and he's always late for class. I hate waiting for professors. Especially 8am classes. If I can get my ass out of bed in time for your boring asshttp://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/were-taking-it-up-notch.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-7089987923185668606Fri, 03 Apr 2009 01:38:00 +00002009-04-08T19:30:27.865-04:00BookSo I've had a couple of days to digest the book now (dubbed with the subtitle "A Max Carter Mystery about rape, racism, and corruption on a small Maine campus" - how cool is that?) and I wanted to provide a brief review.It rocks.Too brief? It starts off great. Builds up the characters and their relationships to each other swiftly and effectively so that when the drama happens, you care.And there http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/bad-little-fall-review.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-1517308762638004544Wed, 01 Apr 2009 23:19:00 +00002009-04-01T19:21:03.597-04:00PranksFunnyThis is hilarious. Hockey sucks balls anyway, so a hot chick annoying their fans is good stuff.I'm pretty sure this was intentional on her part.http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/this-chick-rocks.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-5185010513876721312Wed, 01 Apr 2009 17:12:00 +00002009-04-01T19:02:56.924-04:00PranksFor a guy who pulls pranks on people almost daily, April Fool's Day is the worst day of the year.People are trying to pull one over on me all day. And the standards are so low. Lame, lame, lame. There's a reason it's for fools. But the great thing is that people are paranoid all day that I'm going to get them. And that's the best prank of all.CNN.com has given me hope that there is life for a http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/04/worst-day-of-year-april-fools-day.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-9177368075461875656Tue, 31 Mar 2009 02:29:00 +00002009-03-31T12:18:02.591-04:00BookAs mentioned yesterday, my buddy Mike - going by Michael to be "professional" - has finished the book about Max Carter and it is almost ready at the publisher. Here's an interview I had with him about the book.Me: Tell the readers how this came about.Mike: I've known you for a while, being family (different real last names) and all, and I always thought you were quite the character. When I was inhttp://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/interview-with-michael-colucci-author.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-3729629293865151366Tue, 31 Mar 2009 02:27:00 +00002009-03-30T22:29:12.175-04:00BookI just received word from Mike that the book is being printed now. I'll do an informal chat-based interview with him and post it tomorrow night.We're just weeks - nay, days - away from a book about ME!http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/exciting-news-about-max-carter-book.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-8197305259917498794Mon, 30 Mar 2009 23:03:00 +00002009-03-30T19:11:27.683-04:00PranksI don't drink heavily very often. I don't like being out of control. Also, since people started realizing that I'm the campus prankster, being drunk probably isn't the greatest idea. But Saturday night I made the mistake of being a little too drunk.Okay, wasted.So I actually logged into my Max Carter Facebook page, which I don't do often enough, and posted the status update (miraculously spelled http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/propetic-drunken-facebook-status-update.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-8776015269410502649Sat, 28 Mar 2009 00:57:00 +00002009-03-27T21:36:34.777-04:00PranksMy friend Bill is terrified of getting a girl pregnant. To the point that he won't have sex with anyone. Well, I shouldn't say that. Sometimes he gets drunk and doesn't remember what he did. But he relies on me and a couple of other guys to keep him "safe."He's afraid that the condom will burst, the girl will poke a hole in the condom in an effort to get pregnant, the condom will leak, you name http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/you-got-me-pregnant.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-4031255114208342875Wed, 25 Mar 2009 23:34:00 +00002009-03-25T19:35:05.689-04:00Funnyhttp://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/this-happens-to-me-when-i-look-at-beach.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-6870612943597475030Wed, 25 Mar 2009 01:31:00 +00002009-03-24T21:35:17.652-04:00FunnyAfter yesterday's post about Peeps in the microwave, loyal reader Anna sent me an e-mail with this hilarious picture depicting my favorite floor program:http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/peeps-show.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-3988105809973811527Mon, 23 Mar 2009 23:47:00 +00002009-03-23T19:56:58.997-04:00PranksEaster candy. My favorite. How can you not love Peeps? I have a sweet tooth that basically tries to assassinate me daily. When I was a kid, I would open my mom's sugar jar and scoop mouthfuls of sugar into my mouth and just let it kind of melt.Peeps are like that, only better.And you know what's fun about Peeps? Try putting them in a microwave. Seriously. Try it. Except don't put it in your own.Ihttp://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/fun-with-peeps.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-8520813801757387787Sun, 22 Mar 2009 03:07:00 +00002009-03-21T23:12:46.744-04:00PranksA very simple prank, but always funny.I was walking across the quad today and I saw a huge pile of fresh dogshit. I was going to my buddy's room because we were going to drive to Subway for lunch. I decided to take a detour.I picked up some of the shit with a stick and took it to his car and wiped it all over the underside of his door handle. When he went to open the door, he got a handful of http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/you-cant-handle-poo.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-172804045448321774Wed, 18 Mar 2009 00:31:00 +00002009-03-17T21:02:28.612-04:00PranksSilly, immature, junior high prank ahead. I loved it!I put a pair of dress shoes and khakis in one of the stalls on my floor today and locked the door from the inside. I slipped out under the bottom. I chose nice clothes because not many people will say anything to them because it doesn't look like a resident's attire.I also taped myself making sounds like I was dropping a deuce. Grunting, http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/silly-immature-junior-high-prank-ahead.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8840511455276545987.post-6114497534895391710Mon, 16 Mar 2009 14:58:00 +00002009-03-16T11:23:09.089-04:00PranksSorry about the lack of a post over the past week. Crazy week. But I'm back, and better than ever.I wanted to answer a couple of e-mails to start. The first one came from Nikki in Alabama, and she asked me how I got my start as a prankster. My parents tell me I was always a big prankster as a kid. Nothing major, though.The first big one I remember came when I was 13 or so, when the McDonald's http://ratales.blogspot.com/2009/03/how-it-all-started.htmlnoreply@blogger.com (Mike C)0