Raving Madness

Animal abuse

2012-09-08T05:50:00.002+02:00

Just got foxed in the ass

Crooning

2012-09-08T05:31:00.001+02:00

Enrique Iglesias paparazzi picture received at the newsdesk early this morning...

Messing around with Death ☠

2012-09-05T21:54:00.002+02:00

Spent the whole afternoon messing around with the soundtrack (OST special edition) from the horror comedy movie "Return of the Living Dead I" (based on true events I shit you not) cutting, pasting and adding sound effects. The result is not perfect but taking into consideration, that I'm a newbie at sound mixing, and the software used is stoneage-like, I'm quite satisfied with the outcome ッ based on the Trioxin acid rain theme.

Movie quote:

Frank: International treaty, all skeletons come from India.
Freddy: No kidding, how come?
Frank: How the hell do I know how come? The important question is, where do they get all the skeletons with perfect teeth?

Grinding halt

2012-09-05T21:37:00.001+02:00

Some downloaded cartoon clipart and a speechbubble... and now what?

Copy, cut'n paste disasters

2012-09-02T12:27:00.000+02:00

I encourage you to visit the father of disaster girl, photographer David Roth on Facebook and his site to receive updates. He frequently posts his picures on Facebook, and they are definitely worth taking a look at.

disaster girl + totaled ferrari

disaster girl + gulf oil disaster

Misclaimer

2012-09-01T07:42:00.000+02:00

Meanwhile i Russia...
Whether you're eighteen, eighteen+ or a liar, you WILL watch porn...
Watching adult movies on this russian porn site is mandatory!

russian porn site misclaimer

The hunter & the hunted

2012-08-25T12:07:00.001+02:00

I received this email at 5.30 am this morning. I knew that one fine day, I would be headhunted. With my eminent skills it was bound to happen sooner or later.

Due to the economic crisis and recession there's also a high unemployment rate in Denmark, and thus an ongoing vicious discussion of whether you should take any job you can get or not and not act like a lazy bastard sponging on society and welfare. Well, actually it's more about making the not-so-fortunate feel really rotten, because they are, what they are and you, yourself, cannot afford to have two cars and a big house any longer. It's a sort of a danish national sport kicking people, when they are down.

I must admit, that I don't feel inclined to accept this fine job offer. The salary alone won't pay the rent for a two room flat in the ghetto. The company is located 113 miles or 181 kilometers from, where I live, and since Denmark is small, that's like in the other end of the country and in the middle of nowhere. There's no company website, and they're operating with a huge deficit. So I guess, I will go on being bone idle.

Oh well, perhaps next time...

The "meat deadline" however does sound intriguing!

Short story

2012-08-21T06:50:00.000+02:00

The seven deadly sins:

1) sloth
2-7) whatever

watch out, guys
we're dealing with a badass over here

adapted from: somewhere

bɛldʒəm

2012-08-21T05:51:00.000+02:00

"The Cavalry" (no chivalry)
a satirical tv-programme from the danish national tv-broadcasting company,
unloads a pile of rubbish on Belgium

Rytteriet (rasmus botoft): Belgien er et sygt land

Transcript from danish:
If your are contemplating going on a trip to Belgium, I have to warn you:
Belgium is a small country, which is cramped down in the middle of europe.
There are far too many people in a far too small area ...and there is no ocean!
Belgium is an infected country!!! It's creepy and ugly in Belgium!!!
It is an infected and cramped country, and you should NOT go there!!!
If your are contemplating going on a trip to Belgium, I can only tell you,
that you shouldn't go, you should stay at home in your house!
...I hope you have a really nice day, a pleasant evening and a peaceful night.

Extreme measures

2012-08-20T16:54:00.002+02:00

Meanwhile in Russia:
In this day and age of an apparently escalating and very unpleseant trend
this is a must-have for every household with children: the pedobarometer!

picked up at: turizm-tovar.ru

Rule of thumb

2012-08-17T19:49:00.001+02:00

The newest trend in the rotten state of Denmark
is to measure the amount of rules and laws
implemented in our society in kilometers.

For instance:
last year, 2011, the danish bureaucracy
produced 6 kilometers of new rules, dafuq...

So I guess, rule of thumb is measured in feet!

(Corny, I know. You're a tough crowd)

WOW E.T. GTFO!

2012-08-16T10:18:00.000+02:00

Fashionably late a post celebrating August 15 1977 when SETI's Big Ear finally received a signal from outer space, a 72 seconds strong signal on the narrow radioband aka the Wow-signal:

the wow signal

There has been a lot of speculations about the origin of the Wow-signal but in my opinion, if this was a message transmitted by some sort of intelligent civilisation, the message could be the reaction to the discovery of the earth and the human race; Alien intercom: "Wtf? Let's gtfo of here!!!" (...and the signal was never registered again)

Fashionably late I only found out about the signal in the year of our lord 2011, and I can imagine why. On August 15 1977 I was likely supposed to be attending school. However it's more likely, that I spent the entire day smoking weed. I love the nature!

worlds most confident man meme

true story

We don't always have
earthquakes in Denmark,
but when we do,
I sleep through them like a boss!

SWISH!!!

What the hell was that?
An alien spaceship?
No, that was your life passing by!
Well, can I have a new one?

me gusta

Life and death ✝

2012-08-13T12:43:00.000+02:00

Resuscitation

I recently went to a first aid course. I thought, it would be perfectly ironic to be able to resuscitate a member of the human race, which I obviously don't think the world of. The instructor was great with a healthy attitude regarding life and death and with a great sense of humor. Cpr requires you to pump the chest 100-120 times/minute. A perfect beat for this, the instructor suggested, is "Stayin' alive" or even "Another on bites the dust".

Ture story!

The meaning of life

Assuming you are a Google user, I dare you to make a picture search with the text "der sinn des lebens", which is german for "the meaning of life" (it has nothing to do with the english word "sin"). Regardless of your adult content settings, which undoubtedly are enabled, check out the first picture in the search results.
(click here for the easy way out)

Coincidence? I think not.

Human is to err

2012-08-12T11:44:00.003+02:00

screen capture of one of google translate's numerous mistranslations

That's it!
It's official and out in the open,
a true fact on the internet:
LIFE STINKS!

Man, right next to the lingerie!!!

Y U NO GAY?

2012-08-11T20:48:00.000+02:00

y u no gay meme

Facebook ad
(sort of... well, used to be)

Disaster girl(s)

2012-08-11T19:41:00.002+02:00

disaster girl meme with the danish primeminister Helle Thorning-Schmidt

The first danish female prime minister, social democrat (sociopath) Helle Thorning-Schmidt, has just announced,
she realizes after one year, things aren't going as well as expected. No sexism intended (or?) but this so called "social democrat" spent a whole year figuring out, what was obvious from the very beginnig.

BREAKING NEWS!!!
...this just in:

screen capture of helle thorning schmidt search

The danish voters don't give a flying fuq about the way, the danish prime minister rules the country anyway.
They're more interested in her stone(d) face botox looks. Well, you get, what you deserve, wankers!

First (1st) world problems

2012-08-11T19:24:00.000+02:00

screen capture of my mom use search

OMFG! Using Windows Explorer, now that's perversion taken to the limit. Bad mommy!
Actually, I was searching for a movie quote, when I realized, that search terms depicting,
what the human race is really occupied by, are even more fascinating.

This is the actual quote:

Newt: My mommy always said there were no monsters - no real ones - but there are.
Ripley: Yes, there are, aren't there?
Newt: Why do they tell little kids that?

Bearing that in mind, take another look at the screen cap!
I rest my case...