Ready To Motivate

create new resolution 10 tips

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Tue, 04 Jan 2011 11:12:00 +0000

Holidays and the start of a new year inevitably make us think about how we can improve ourselves, and have the life we want in the future. We make resolutions - I must lose weight, I will save more money - and then lose our way. That's because we aren't matching our resolutions with who we are inside. We're more likely to succeed if we work on discovering our inner, Real selves, appreciate who we already are, and then take a chance on custom-made changes, not one-size-fit all resolutions. Here are ten tips for making the new year better in a Real way.

1. Let your values be your guide

There are plenty of people who will tell you what should be important to you, if you let them. Friends, co-workers, family, even the mass media, bombard us with opinions and ideas. Don't just accept what others say. Decide for yourself what matters most and let those values set your course.

2. Take a long-term view

Bad habits, difficult relationships, and other disappointments don't develop overnight. Similarly, life doesn't get better in a moment. Change happens slowly, step-by-step. Have the patience to see it through.

3. Let Go of the 'Shoulds'

When you were a kid, you needed grown-ups to tell you what was right and wrong and what you should do in a given situation. As an adult you can make these choices for yourself. 'Shoulds' produce resentment and anger. Instead, do what you know in your heart is right, and set your own standards.

4. Define Yourself as Beautiful

Fewer than five percent of us believe we are beautiful, but whenever I meet someone, I can see something beautiful in her right away. You may not fit the mass media image of conventional, external beauty, but there are things that make you attractive. Remember, beauty is an inside job.

5. Let Go of Being Perfect

As much as we hear that 'nobody's perfect' it's awfully hard to believe. This is because what we constantly see in the media are air-brushed images of people who appear perfect and we come to believe it is a reasonable goal. When we fall short of perfect, then we feel like failures, just for being ourselves. This year, why not just forget that whole concept and replace it with 'I don't have to be perfect.' The truth is, the people who love you know that you have flaws and just don't care. You don't have to either...

6. Stop Competing

Life is not a game to be won or lost. It is more like a dance that never ends. People who make life a competition live in fear of losing. But if you understand that there's no first prize and no finish line, only opportunities to grow and experience things, then that fear is replaced by appreciation and wonder. Try to think about growing rather than winning.

7. Try a Little Self-Empathy

We all hope to be kind and considerate when it comes to others. But have you ever made an effort to think about yourself in the same way? Most of us spend too much time judging ourselves harshly. It's hard to be happy when you let that little voice inside you endlessly say mean and critical things.

8. Make Friends with Your Flaws

When you stop believing in perfection, it's a lot easier to adopt a new view of those things people call flaws. In many cases, we can redefine these differences and understand them as gifts. What makes a mole a beauty mark? The answer is in your perspective. Why not adopt a perspective that honors all those things that make you different?

9. Listen to Your Body

Many of us lead lives that are so fast-paced and stressful that we push ourselves to the point of getting sick. In most cases, our bodies send us signals -fatigue, aches, hungers - when it's time to slow down, rest and examine our emotions. We can avoid a lot of sick days if we pause to listen to our bodies and respond with gentle self-care.

10. Try New Things

In the end, the important things in life are found in relationships and experiences. We feel good when we connect with others and take on challenges that allow us to grow. If you have always wanted to feel closer to someone you know, take the risk. And if you have longed to try something new - in the arts, your work, sports, or anything else -- give yourself permission to try. A little courage will bring you great rewards in the coming year.

Stress Management With Communication Skill

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 08:45:00 +0000

Now days, every one is very busy, in discharging their duty, either in their working place or in office. As such times are like that, we can’t imagine work without stress, which has become part and parcel in our modern life.

Communication skills play a major role to overcome the stress and strain.

Causes of stress:

1. Probably, You are not in a position, in explaining you views and feelings clearly and in straight manner to others.

2. Your colleagues or others can’t grasp and understand speedily, what was said by you and repeatedly asking you the same thing, causing great inconvenience to you.

3. You may not move and speak freely and easily among your colleagues, in the office and exhibiting shyness.
4. You are doubt about handling new project by yourself, as; you are under the impression that you may not motivate your other co-workers well.

5. You are facing the language problem and so not clearly discussing the related matters, both you’re your colleagues and customers.

6. You may not satisfactorily clarify and giving the solutions to the clients, who approach you whenever they got any doubts.

7. You are probably getting nervousness and also unnecessary excitement, while giving your valuable opinions and suggestions, during the indoor-meetings conducted in the office from time to time.

8. You are not doing proper introspection and self-analysis about your mode of working and may not showing positive attitude for the comments(right or wrong in nature) made against you.

9. You are not making your presence felt in the team work of office, by your sheer and sincere efforts and in discharging the duties.

10. You may not exhibit your talents in the right way and up to the mark.

Stress Management:

1. First of all have self-confidence in your capabilities and develop leadership qualities, which are inherent in you.

2. Read newspapers and books on the related topics, concerned to your job.

3. Attend to the classes on spoken-languages (English and other languages, if necessary), regularly, to improve your working knowledge and freely-speaking ability, on the subjects, related to you work.

4. Avoid stage-fear and shyness and create opportunities to mix freely with the people and also speak in the meetings, without bothering what the audience is thinking about you.
In the initial stages, you may feel nervous but certainly you become expert afterwards in your subject and other related matters.

Self –motivation also plays a vital role in developing communication skills.

“Failure is the stepping-stone to success in life”

Stress Meaning Causes And Management Tips

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 08:38:00 +0000

Now a days, people of every walk of life are not spared from the effects of stress in one way or other, on their health and their behavior with public and family members.
Dr.Hans Selye, the father of stress theory, defined stress as “the non-specific response of the body to any demand made upon it’’.

The demand can be in the form of,
A threat, a challenge or any kind of change which requires the body to adapt. The response is automatic and at the same time immediate.

Stress is of two types:

• Eustress: It is good in nature and helps us perform better in our dealings with others.
• Distress: It is bad in nature and causes upset or makes us sick.

Common manifestations (symptoms) of stress:

Stress effects can be divided into four categories.

1. Physical effects: The affected person show:

-Fatigue (tiredness), headache, sleeplessness, body pain, stiffness of neck, low-back pain.
-Heart palpitations, chest pain, abdominal cramps (pain in the stomach), vomiting sensation.
-Trembling, cold extremities, flushing or sweating and frequent colds.

2. Mental symptoms:

-Decrease in concentration and memory power, mind racing back.
-Confusion, Loss of sense of humor.

3. Emotional effects:

-Anxiety, nervousness, depression, anger, frustration, worry.
-Fear, irritability, impatience, and short temper.

4. Behavioral type:

-Pacing, fidgeting, nail- biting, foot tapping, increased eating.
-Smoking, drinking alcohol, crying, yelling.
-Blaming others, throwing things and even hitting others.

Causes of stress: The causes are known as ‘’stressors or triggers’’.

Stressors are of two kinds: External and Internal types.

• External Stressors:

These are Noises, bright lights, bossiness and aggressiveness shown on you by some other person,

-Rules and red tapism in offices, death of a relative, loss of job, etc.

• Internal stressors: include

-Not getting enough sleep excess caffeine intake, pessimistic thinking, self- criticism
-Not able to achieve unrealistic expectations, Type-A (perfectionist) mentality.
It is important to note that most of the stress that we have, is actually self- generated and it is paradox that most of the times we blame other persons/ situations for our upset.

How to manage Stress?

1. Changing the lifestyle –Like taking less amount of coffee, tea, colas, etc.
2. Take a well-balanced diet and better not to consume the junk foods.
3. Doing exercises regularly (at least 30 minutes per day), five times per week.
4. Sleep adequately and ensure enough leisure time to do something which you like very much.
5. Do relaxation techniques, like meditation or self- hypnosis etc.
6. Change of stressful situations.
7. be assertive and managing the time and money systematically and carefully.
8. Refute negative thoughts, develop positive thinking,
9. Keep a sense of humor.

If we can learn to manage it, Stress is a positive stimulation for many achievements in life.

Please share your experiences in Stress Management.

How To Defeat The Fear

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 08:24:00 +0000

The following 4 things are common for all living beings:

1. Food: for living and survival.
2. Sleep: to recoup the bodily energy (as sleep provides rest to the body).
3. Sex: It is a biological need and it serves many purposes, like:
-calm up the exiting sensory organs,
-Removes the feeling of loneliness,
-Helps to control the blood pressure,
-Brings pleasure to the mind and body, etc.

4. Fear: What for?
The above four things are even though present in all creatures, man’s response and worrying about them is to some extent is more. But, after fulfilling the three acts, they will not give trouble to you.
But in case of fear, the situation is different and it is always accompanying us. So let us discuss about it and clear the doubts.
Even infants (children below I year of age) suddenly wake up from the sleep and show feelings of disturbance and excitement. That means, since our birth, the fear giving some sort of discomfort to us, with or without any cause.

The usual causes for the fear-complex are:

-Getting diseases by indulging in irregular food habits and other immoral activities.
-The rich are always spending the days in sleepless-nights, as how to save their huge amounts of money, either from thieves or harmful known persons.
-The people with name and fame in the society may think that one day their name may be tarnished, unless they behave carefully.
-Rulers afraid of their enemies.
-Beautiful women and handsome men worry of their old age.
-The good and the noble people afraid of bad and rowdy elements.
-Every living being worry about the inevitable death-feeling.

But is there any place on this earth to live in safely and without fear on this earth?

How to overcome fear?

First of all one must know that what we are seeing and enjoying in this word are ephemeral (temporary) and they disappear from our sight on one day. So we should develop detachment and also less inclination towards them.
We should also realize that which is eternal and truthful is nothing but God and once we realize this fact, automatically the feeling of ‘’ this is mine and this is I’’ goes out of our mind and we will be free from “fear”. Other wise the fear of cycle goes on and no mental peace to us.
Our role, as long as we live in this world is just like trustee or steward. Moreover, we are ambassadors of God, in this world. Every thing here belongs to God.
The golden rule is: “where there is detachment, there is no fear’’. Everything moves around depending on “attachment and detachment’’.

How To Make Life Easier In 4 Steps

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 31 Dec 2010 08:18:00 +0000

At times, we all have things going on in our minds. There can be the little worries of having to go to the shop because there’s no food in the cupboards, to the big worries like being severely in debt or having a family member in hospital.

The “problem” with worrying is that it can have serious implications on our physical and mental health. People who have previously been in top shape can let one problem get to them so badly that they start having panic attacks or have their problems incessantly on their mind.

I should know, I’ve had times in my life where I have let my problems literally take over my thought patterns and consume me at all times. Yet, with the four simple steps today, it’s actually fairly simple to literally eliminate unnecessary worrying from your life.

After this, I also believe that life will start to feel a lot lighter, as if a heavy burden has been lifted from your shoulders.

1. Consider the Worst Possible Outcome

A few years ago one of my friends confided in me that he wasn’t sure whether he wanted to continue playing for the school football team that we were on. At the next training session when he didn’t show up, the coach asked me what was wrong, and I told him that my friend might have lost his passion and I wasn’t sure if he would be back.

A couple of days later my friend came back to me and said how he really wanted to start playing again, and had merely been going through a rough time when he told me what he did. I instantly remembered how I had told the coach my friend might not want to play anymore, and started worrying about the possible outcome.

Thoughts ran through my head such as “Would the coach pick him for the next game?”, “Would the coach tell him what I said?”, “Would he be dropped from the team?” and so on. I let this situation really get to me and the possible outcomes really consumed my thoughts.

About a week later I built up the courage to tell the coach I might have been wrong about my friend and the coach gave me a very nonchalant reply “Oh it’s fine, I had forgotten about it anyway”. Instead of worrying for a week, I could have looked at the worst possible outcome – probably that the coach would tell my friend and I would have to explain things – and then just taken action.

The worst that could have happened is rarely that bad when we really look at things, so I advise you to do this with all of the things you are worrying about. Look at the worst possible outcome, and then work to improve on that as best you can.

2. Keep Yourself Busy

The reason that we love Television so much is that it literally absorbs us into what is going on. When we are watching the black box we forget about everything else for a while and are totally consumed in the flashing images on screen.

It is for this amount of time that our worries and problems disappear, even if at the time we aren’t aware of it. It is only when we have the time to think and worry about something, that it actually becomes a problem.

If, on the other hand, you can keep yourself busy doing something like studying, cleaning or just socialising then you limit the time you have to let your problems consume you. After all, something is only a problem when you think about it.

3. Realise You Can Get Through Anything

I firmly believe that it is completely up to us how we deal and react with every single situation in life. And, for that reason, I believe it is possible to see the positive in everything and enjoy almost all aspects of life. That being said though, it is much easier said than done, and there are definitely hard times which we have all faced in life.

Have you struggled? Is there something that has happened in your life that was really terrible? If so, then realise you got through it in one piece. How do I know? Because you’re sitting in front of a computer screen and able to spend your time reading an article like this.

No matter what challenges you have came across in your life, you have been able to get through them. Because of that, you will be able to do exactly the same again with whatever you are worrying about now or anything that faces you in the future.

4. Put Things Into Perspective

Just like looking at the worst possible outcome can force us to realise our worries really aren’t that bad, so can the art of putting things into perspective.

Unless something threatens your health or the health of those around you, then it is not that big of a problem. Debt, a break-up or even losing a material item is really nothing compared to the possibility of death or something really serious.

I remember the story of one man in a poor area of America who really wanted to become a music producer. He spent as much of his spare time as he could making music and honing his talents. Yet, his parents wanted something different. They wanted him to become a lawyer or a doctor purely for financial reasons, despite the fact that he had no interest in either.

They pushed him so hard and so often that one day he ended up committing suicide, leaving a note of how he wished they would have supported him. Put things into perspective.

A complete Mantra To Live Long

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Thu, 30 Dec 2010 11:02:00 +0000

Demanding careers, raising a family coupled with pressures of daily life is daunting task for man and woman alike. Exercising or daily workout of 30 minute is the last thing on the mind, though we find time to watch TV or hang out with friends. We can come up with hordes of reason for not hitting the gym.

Being fit should be a part and priority in everyone's life. Being physically fit helps you to live a longer life. It means more than looking your best on the beach and finishing first in the marathon. By keeping yourself physically fit, your body learns to deal with the stress of daily life. Incorporate going to the gym as a daily habit like brushing your teeth or taking a shower. Devote good 30 minutes to an hour for exercises or any other kind of workout for making you feel fit and look good.

Daily workout or an hour of exercise helps to relieve stress, depression anxiety, increase one's ability to concentrate, think faster and become sharper, helps reduce blood pressure, reduces the risk of life threatening diseases, increases flexibility to maintain muscular tension and tones muscles to build and maintain bones.

If you decide to shove off going to gym, you will miss out on the benefits mentioned above and much more. 30 minutes to an hour of physical fitness is major health investment.

If this is your first step in the fitness world, get in touch with gyms or personal trainers to see which, what fitness plan suits you the best. You will also come across adverts with promises of keeping you in the best of shape. Learn to differentiate between the real and fake.

After you decide on your fitness plan, you have to start working on the same to stay in shape and keep fit. Don't go overboard on the first day as you might feel very exhausted or burned out. To reach your ideal level of fitness, be sincere, consistent and stick with the program.

Mornings are the best time for doing workouts. Get up an hour earlier and hit the gym. After an hour at the gym you will feel fresh all day long. If you put off doing your workouts in the morning, you are more likely to put if off later due to plain laziness or tiredness from working all day long.

Another way to enjoy your self being physically fit is to undertake some physical activities such walks, hiking, mountain biking, playing golf, etc, with your spouse, kids or friends.

Personal Goal Setting

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 09:35:00 +0000

How do you begin personal goal setting? What are the areas you can start setting goals? These are questions you would ask if you are new to goal setting.
As a career builder you are probably more concerned about career goals. However, there are other areas of your life that you can set goals for yourself.
Goals shouldn’t be about career alone. Goals can be set in the area of attitude, career, education, family, financial, physical and personal/social. Each of these is interrelated. They are anchored on what you value and what are your priorities.

Your personal goal setting can be in these areas:

1. Attitude

What are the attitudes and habits that are holding you back from reaching greater heights? How is this attitude affecting you, your career and your relationship with your family? Make specific points to change this attitude that is affecting the way you behave. Your attitude determines how far you can go in life. Take time to confront your negative attitude and make a plan to change it. This area of personal goal setting is one of the most important.

2. Career

In the course of interviewing hundreds of candidates, I am sometimes surprised at the number of candidates that do not have career goals. Where do you want to be in 3 years time? Where do you see yourself in 5 years time? How will you get there? What are the skills you need? What are the potential barriers? As a career builder newbie, you may not have all the answers. In that case, seek someone you can talk to or better yet – mentor you.

3. Education

Continuous education is important for success in life. Not just your career. And education should not be just for the sake of career promotions although people often do that. You may want to learn new things that can enrich your life. Learning is a process, a journey – not a destination. You should never stop learning in order to improve.

4. Family

How much time do you want to spend with your family? What are some of the things that you have neglected to do for them the past year? Something that you have always wanted to do for them – perhaps a holiday? Put these down in writing. It may seem simple but trust me this is one area where it is challenging for personal goal setting. Sometimes we misplace our priorities.

5. Financial

How much money do you want to save by when? What would be the big-ticket items that you would like to buy? A house? A car? How much do you plan to earn by when? Having a financial goal is crucial in enjoying the material side of things. Financial rewards are directly related to our careers. Therefore, they are important in your personal goal setting.

6. Health – Physical/Mental

If you aren’t healthy physically and mentally, you won’t be able to enjoy the fruits of your labor. What are the steps you are willing to take in order to achieve optimum physical and mental health? Do you plan to run X number of days in a week? Meditate an hour each day? What are the measurements you would use for the goals in this area?

7. Personal/Social

Allocate time for yourself too. Set a goal to achieve this for yourself. This is your time for the things you enjoy. Is it getting together with friends? Or it could be meeting new friends. Some people measure their success by the amount of free time they have for themselves to pursue their hobbies.

These are some of the areas you can consider when considering your personal goal setting. If you are ambitious enough – choose each of these areas and start writing some goals for these to be achieved for the year.

Tips to Grow Your Career

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 09:14:00 +0000

You found your first job and you feel a little anxious. You think to yourself – “How am I going to survive through all these?” With the right attitude and guidance, you will soon look forward to doing your best.
Like any other career enhancement tips, there are no guarantees for success. However, if you bring the right attitude and decide to take action then you are half way there. Nothing will stop a first jobber like you from shining at your workplace.

1. Self-discipline

The value of self-discipline in a first jobber is often underestimated. Now that you are in the working world you think to yourself, “Is self-discipline overrated?” I will tell you, no. It is not overrated. I have often found new staff with good self-discipline doing better than those who are poor in it.

Let me use a simple example to demonstrate this, assuming it’s a Friday and the rest of the department is planning to go out for a fun night. You have an important document to be completed for the coming Monday. What do you do? Give the fun night a pass and complete the work? Or join the fun and hope that you will find time to finish it over the weekend thus leaving you little chance to perfect it before submission?

Part of self-discipline is also about sacrifice. When you have strong self-discipline, it is inevitable that you would need to sacrifice some fun time to focus on your goals. If you are interested in advancing your career you may take some courses, or even read books to increase your knowledge. All these activities come with an opportunity cost. It could very well mean less time for leisure activities.

2. Success

You're probably thinking, “Success as part of these practical career enhancement tips is funny.” Let me assure you it is not. What I want to explain here is this – if you want to enhance your career, define what success is to you. Once you know what success is to you then you can plan towards that goal. Spend some time thinking what success is to you. Crystallize this in your mind. Assuming you know what success is to you, the next step is to be single-minded in the pursuit of your goal.

Being single-minded means to be focused on your goals. When you focus your energy on your goal, you get more out of your effort. You inch closer to your goals. When you are single-minded other things do not distract you. You know what you want and you power yourself towards it as best as you can so you can clearly see what you want.

Knowing your goal and your personal definition of success is an important element amongst these career enhancement tips for first jobbers. Equally important is to know your own strengths and your skills. If you want to enhance your career, play up on your strengths and improve on your skills required for your job. What are you good at? What are the skills sets you do not have that are required for the job? Build up on those skills.

The career enhancement tips in this sub-section basically means this – when you define what is success to you, you then pursue it single-mindedly knowing your strengths and the skills required to attain that success.

3. Sincerity

Sincerity in your career means a lot of things. For me, as a first jobber you should look at doing your work sincerely and joyfully. Meaning, do not treat your work as a drag. If you feel that your work is a drag, then start by asking yourself. Why is it so, before blaming anyone else – be it the company, your boss or your colleagues. So, be sincere with yourself. What is your core challenge in not being able to do your work sincerely?

Being sincere at your work means doing it with your level best. It means playing your part and taking personal responsibility for your work. It also means to share your learning and knowledge. When you share what you know about a certain task, you become an asset to your unit and this inevitably enhances your career. Many people think, the more they hoard what they know the more advantage they have. However, in my experience this is not true. I find that the more you share the more others are willing to share with you and the more you know.

In summary, the most important and practical career enhancement tips you can start now is – developing self-discipline, learning to sacrifice, define what success means to you, be single-minded in pursuit of your goals by knowing your strengths and skills, and doing your work with sincerity and have sharing as a work value you carry.

How To Develop Positive Attitude at Work

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 19 Nov 2010 09:05:00 +0000

Developing positive attitude at work can determine how successful you are in your career. However, this can be tough especially when things seem to go wrong all the time.
I had my fair share of setbacks throughout my career. Along the way, I started developing positive attitudes to help me deal with these setbacks.
Remember you are your own career builder and you are responsible for your own success.
You can adopt or adapt them in developing your own positive attitude at work.

1. Do The Best You Can And Tell Yourself The Best Has Got To Be Good Enough

How much better can we do a job? I believe, as long as we do the best we can, within the situation we are in - the work will take care of itself. There will always be critics who will come off as what I call ‘fake perfectionist’. People who seem to know how best to do a better job without understanding the limitations you have to work with. Let them be. These people just like to take on the persona of a ‘perfectionist’ in order to criticize.

2. Things Aren't As Bad As You Think They Are

I remember reading a research article once that said only 4% of our worries come true. And the 4% are usually very small worries. When things seem to go bad for me and I start to worry, I remind myself of this. You are better off focusing your energy on your work.

3. Think Positive, As You Think So You Are

'Think Positive' is probably one of the most cliché terms that you have heard but worth repeating over and over again.

You can call it 'count your blessings' or whatever term you want to use. It's the truth, when faced with challenges sometimes we need to ask ourselves, what can be worse?

Get out of the 'Poor 'Ol Little Me' syndrome because that isn’t going to help your cause. Especially when you are trying to complete an important assignment.

Developing positive attitudes at work isn’t easy. As with everything in life, you need practice. Just pick one of these listed and remind yourself of it each time you start to worry or face any challenges.

Five Easy Tips To Develop And Feel Self-Confidence

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Sun, 14 Nov 2010 10:58:00 +0000

It’s not true that successful people don’t need any tip for developing their confidence. Everyone needs self-assurance no matter how successful they have been. Perhaps the main difference is that successful people take the tips and internalize them whereas others take them but never use them. So, if you pick up few tips, you need to use them to your advantage. Don’t waste them!

Confidence is necessary to achieve success in life. Don’t worry if you currently feel that you’re lack of confidence, I’m going to share with you some great tips that you can use immediately to boost your confidence. As long as you’re willing to learn and apply it, you’ll be able to develop and feel confidence.

Here are some of the steps you can follow to boost confidence…

1. Make an effort to spend time with confident and positive people. And try to stay clear from negative people. Negativity can spread like a wildfire, so be careful. Fortunately, positivity also has similar effect, it can also spread like a wildfire. Being in the midst of self-assuring and positive people will give you the vitality and strength to always look on the bright side of life despite surrounded by negativities.

2. Find a mentor. All successful people have mentors in life, those who can efficiently guide you, advise you and also offer some confident-boosting tips. You will achieve success faster if you can find a good mentor. He or she may have a great deal of experience in the field that is similar to yours. Therefore, can help you avoid mistakes in your endeavor. In order to find a mentor, you need to be open-minded and willing to discuss both your strengths and weaknesses as well.

3. Understand that confidence is just a feeling. Think about all the situations where you have felt confident. Such positive thoughts can make you confident in future. Sit down for a few minutes everyday and analyze the happenings during your day. Imagine all the things that make you feel certain. This can boost your morale and make you even more poise.

4. List all your reasons to be confident. Try and list all the qualities that have helped you to be confident today. Include your victories, skills and also mention about your goals. After you have done this you will see how powerful your analysis can be. It will make you feel even more confident.

5. Never stop learning! Learning doesn’t stop after school graduation. There are much more things to learn in real life than in school. Be a big advocate of continuing education. Never stop to improve and upgrade your skills. That’s how you improve and maintain your confidence in real life. DO NOT strive for perfection or flawless performance as this will only make you feel stressed. Always strive for IMPROVEMENTS instead!

How to Control Your Emotions in the Office

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 09:10:00 +0000

As a newbie in the office, you may not know how to control your emotions when you are stressed. Emotions in this context refers to extreme emotional responses such as excessive expression of anger. So, how to control your emotions effectively?

1. Make A Decision That Control Is Possible
All behavioral changes start from one thing. The decision, acceptance and commitment in your mind that you want to make that change. In this case, self-control is possible albeit a long and gradual process. Only you can make the decision on how to control your emotions.

Remember that YOU hold the key to your own success as your behavior can threaten your career success. The idea is that you want to avoid extreme emotional responses for example in the case of anger – rage and hate.

2. Identify The Emotions You Need To Control
Chances are you already know which emotions you need to control. The first step is to identify which emotion. Based on personal experience and observation in the office, these are the few I can identify – anger, anxiety, fear and enthusiasm.

You may say, “Wait a minute, isn’t enthusiasm a good emotion? Why should we control it?” Well, remember that we are talking about excessive expression of that emotion. Ever met a colleague who shows too much enthusiasm on a particular project that it just gets in the way of other team members?

3. Get Rid Of The Stupid Excuses
We often hear colleagues acknowledging that they have a certain problem but that there is no point in changing their behavior. These people like to admit their mistakes expecting you to excuse them but at the same time you are to accept that they won’t make an effort to change.

It is crucial to get rid of the stupid excuses that make you think you don't have to control your emotions. In this case again, we are referring to excessive expression of emotions in the office.

If you truly want to know how to control your emotions, then take a step to get rid of these commonly used excuses:

"I am being true to myself, why should I change?”
“I am young - I can afford to be foolish.”
“Well, if they are good colleagues/friends, they just have to accept me for who I am.”

4. Positive Change Should And Can Happen

When I hear these excuses, it always makes me wonder if these people know who their true self is? Is the ‘true self’ static? Aren’t our beliefs, attitudes and actions constantly changing? If that is so, then why can’t one choose to change for the better?
Remember this, if you want to know how to control your emotions, positive change should happen. Self-improvement has nothing to do with ‘true self’, age – young or old; and friends and colleagues accepting who you are. Self-growth has everything to do with you and not others.

Positive change should and can happen once you think about the career success it can bring.

5. Understand The Hot Buttons
What are the situations that push these emotions? Is it stress or lack of time management skills? Is it the tone and manner, which someone used to communicate to you? For example, there must be something that caused the excessive expression of anxiety. Does it happen before a major presentation? Once you understand these then you can begin to address them.

6. Simplest Exercise I Have Used Successfully
This exercise is one that I feel you can implement almost instantly to control your emotions. Ask yourself these questions and take these steps whenever you feel your emotions getting out of control.

Can I do something about it?
If it is a yes, what can I do about it? Then implement a game plan to tackle the ‘problem’.
If I cannot do anything about it, then why should I (be angry/be anxious/fear)?
Majority of the time, you will find that there are things that you can do, and once you start addressing even a simple plan you will see the emotion subsides. The tendency to over express that emotion is thus minimized.

This technique on how to control your emotions is used successfully by myself. Act upon your decision today and see that gradual change.

Developing Leadership Skills for the New in the Workplace

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 09:01:00 +0000

It is never too early to start developing leadership skills. As someone new in the workplace, you may aspire to become the leader of your organization some day. Some people believe leaders are born and not made.

It is possible to develop leadership skills. If you accept the fact leaders behave in a certain manner, then it is possible to learn the behaviors of a leader. People follow leaders because they have gained their trust and earned their respect.

Learning to be a leader takes a long time. Because of this, it is wise to start developing these skills early. What are the areas you need to work on when developing leadership skills?
1. Integrity
Leaders have high ethics. They are honest. If you are to gain people's trust then it is important to learn this trait early. Some of the actual situations you can practice this behavior is taking responsibility for your own actions. Do not play the blame game when things go wrong. Leaders take personal responsibility for their team’s actions and results.

2. Passionate
Leaders are passionate. They are enthusiastic about their work and they even have the ability to rub this energy off on their followers. Do you take on assignments given to you enthusiastically? This is one good behavior to start when developing leadership skills.

3. Commitment
When developing leadership skills, look at the easiest to start. Commitment to your work is one of the easiest. Can you truly say you are willing to work hard at the job assigned? Leaders work hard and have a strong discipline in following through with their work.

4. Courageous
If people are to follow you then as a leader you need to be courageous. Leaders are brave when they confront risks and the unknown. The ultimate test of a leader’s courage is also the courage to be open. When looking at developing leadership skills, do you have the courage to speak up on things that matter?

5. Goal Oriented
Leaders are very focused on the objectives that need to be attained. They develop a plan and strategy to achieve the objectives. In addition, they will also need to build commitment from the team and rally them to achieve the organization’s goal. When developing leadership skills, start by looking at how goal oriented you are now. Improve upon that behavior.

6. Developing People
Developing people whether by training, coaching or teaching them is one of the main traits of a good leader. No one can achieve organization goals alone. The team is needed in order to achieve them. Leaders develop the people to build a stronger team so that the organization is effective. Start by developing your own knowledge when developing leadership skills.

7. Prioritize
Leaders do the most urgent and important things first regardless of their interest in them. For them, whatever that needs to be done should be completed with the best possible effort. How do you fare with this trait? Do you tasks that you are uncomfortable with? Start developing leadership skills in this area by recognizing what are the important tasks to complete.

8. No Public Glory
Leaders understand that at best they will get private credit for their work. Public glory is not expected. They know whatever achievements are the result of joint effort of their units. They share glory and credit with the rest for the work. They know they are only as good as their team. When developing leadership skills, ask yourself this – are you generous enough to share the fruits of your unit’s achievements?

Developing leadership skills is a long process. Some people are born with such traits. They develop into leaders much faster. Leadership is also a set of behavior as much as a skill. Hence, it is possible to learn leadership skills. Start now and when the opportunity arise you will be ready.

Be Who You Want to Be

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 08:57:00 +0000

What is Our Personality?

I searched around for some definitions of this term and I have to say that my favourite is rather basic: “A set of qualities that make a person distinct from another”. Nice, simple, to the point and the exact definition that I’ve come to think the word means through my 19 years of existence.

On top of that statement, I, like many others, believe that our personality includes our beliefs and values so this is the understanding of the word I’m going to use here. Feel free to substitute your own definition and still go through the process towards the middle of this post.

How It Is Formed

Your current personality, whatever it may be, has been formed in a number of ways. Psychologists have studied human personalities for years and have come to a number of conclusions. First of all, it is believed that certain traits in our character are hereditary, yet things like our values and beliefs are derived from socialization and unique experiences, mostly from childhood.

Based on that statement, it’s likely that the personality of you and anyone you know is based on:

Social experiences (especially from childhood)
Unique experiences that you have had in your lifetime
The environment in which you grew up and how you had to act
While most of this might seem obvious, there is some strong research which suggests that a lot of our current personality is in-fact, genetic. As an example, researchers from the University of Minnesota studied 8,000 twins who had been separated shortly after birth and reunited later in life for whatever reason. They found that even though one of the twins may have lived a completely different live in a different environment, their behaviours were still almost identical.

I don’t think I like the idea that our personality and specifically our behaviours are largely proven to be based around our genetic make-up. That being said, I still believe it is entirely possible to change your personality and literally be whoever you want to be.

Designing your Own Personality

Before continuing with the following steps on designing your own personality, spend a few minutes thinking of the personalities of people in your life. I have some close friends that I know whenever I see them they will cheer me up because they are happy and very positive. On the other hand, I also have friends that are close, but I can always predict how they will react in certain situations and it is usually in a negative manner.

I think all of you can relate to my situation of having friends who you love to be around and other friends who you do care about, but make you feel ‘drained’ when you spend time with them.

The whole point of this post and personality development in general is to develop the characteristics you want to have rather than the ones you’ve been conditioned with.

Following are four steps that I have personally used in the past month to help bring about a change in my own personality that have allowed me to literally be the type of person I want to be. If you are just a skim reader, do not take any advice in this post. The sections in bold need their descriptions to be read in order to have this process result in the kind of personality that you want.

1. Be Honest With Your Current Traits

How would you describe yourself right now? Personally I think I have quite a split personality. At times I can be quiet, I keep myself to myself and I’m very considerate towards the feelings of others. At other times, I can be quite crazy, highly outgoing and literally oblivious to what people think and I don’t really care.

It’s important that you are honest with your current traits so you can decide what you want to change. The position I would like to take my life requires me to be considerate to others so I wouldn’t change that, but I also want to have other characteristics which don’t necessarily compliment being considerate.

If you’ve just spent the last few days in a negative spiral, cursing everything and thinking the world owes you a favour, then don’t define yourself as someone who is happy and positive all the time. You may be happy and positive some of the time, but you should be aware of the traits you aren’t so proud of as well as the ones that you are. Honest self-assessment is key to this step of the process.

2. Define the Qualities You Want to Have

Because this is all about you being who you want to be, it’s time to pick the qualities that you want to have. I have to stress that is important that you do not go overboard on this part of the process and pick tons of qualities that you desire. It is far easier to focus on around 5 core qualities you would like to have at a time rather than a list of 20 or more.

It is important you pick qualities that you want to have, rather than qualities you think people want you to have. I put honest and trustworthy on my list because they matter to me personally, but I also put positive because life is a toss-up between that and negative. Most people will say they want to be positive yet they unconsciously love drama in their lives, so really think about this before making your list.

3. Visualise Yourself for 21 Days with These Qualities

The 21-day format has been without a doubt the most amazing thing I have came across in my life. I like to think that I semi-invented this idea because even though it is featured in the book ‘Psycho Cybernetics’ by Maxwell Maltz, I can’t find any evidence online of someone who had put a plan in place for this and implemented it .

This third part of the process will involve you visualising yourself in any situation having the qualities that you want to have. There are a few things to remember during visualisations and the 21-day challenge:

You must do this for 21 days without missing a day
You need to visualise yourself being how you want to be in terms of the end result, not the process
Your visualisations need to be as real as possible - notice smells, colours, small details and sounds from your imagined environment
To give an example, If I want the quality of positivity to become natural, then each day I must spend a couple of minutes visualising myself being positive. For example I might visualise myself, as vividly as possible, being positive after an event that most people would struggle to remain happy about. I am aware of the fact that this idea will sound very silly if you have never tried it before.

However, it is scientifically proven that our nervous system can not tell the difference between a real event and one that is vividly imagined. The 21 days that you will do this process for is enough time for new connections and pathways to form in your brain, thus ‘imprinting’ your desired result - sort of like a habitual auto-response.

4. Act as If They Are Present

This is quite self explanatory, but in everyday life see if you can act as if your desired qualities are already present. If you want to be positive then be positive, if you wish to be honest then start implementing that in your life. This will get much, much easier as you get closer to the end of the 21 day challenge and this starts to become habitual.

For those of you who do take this challenge I would love for you to come back in around three weeks and let me know how you get on. To everyone else, I would love your thoughts of the idea in general and what your thoughts are on changing our personalities.

Sri Sri Ravi Shankar on Communication Skills

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 08:50:00 +0000

Art of Living Guru Sri Sri Ravi Shankar on improving Communication Skills:

It is an art to express our opinion in appreciable way. Those who possess this type of effective art of communication are unique in nature. To communicate affectionately with one and all is a skill worth possessing. Communicating without prejudice is vital for successful living.

It you come across a person, who knows more than you, be like a child and listen to him as attentively. If you face someone with less knowledge than you have, be humble and strive to make him as good as or even better than you.

While taking to a child, talk to him as if you are a child. Talk with an elderly person remembering that one day you will also become an old person. Communicate with a person of your same age group, as if you are his best friend.

This world is varied, beyond our imagination. There is always something to share, learn and teach. Become a powerful communicator, so that others will attract towards you. Improve your way of communication, which improves your life as well.

Most of us are not good listeners. When you are listening to somebody, the speaker’s very first sentence triggers some conversation with in you.

A good listener is always a good speaker and later on he will become a good leader.

How To Get Public Speaking Skills

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 12 Nov 2010 08:29:00 +0000

Public speaking is the process of speaking to a group of people in a structured, deliberate manner intended to inform, influence, or entertain the listeners. Public speaking within a group of people is a difficult activity. Because listeners have better access to information since the internet became common place, audiences expect more content from speakers today. If you would rather spend your time preparing your content than reading a book on public speaking, this is an article especially for you.

Starting Your Speech:

In modern world, Speech tends to be much less formal than they were twenty years ago. Most audience these days prefers a relatively informal approach. However, there is a certain structure to the opening of a Speech that you should observe.

• Get people's attention and build rapport

• Welcome them

• Introduce yourself

• State the purpose of your Speech

• State how you want to deal with questions

Make Friends from the Audience:

When you stand up in front of that audience, you’re going to be really nervous. Poor speakers pay little or no attention to their audience as people. Big mistake!!

If you can see your audience as a group of individuals, you’ll be much more likely to connect with those individuals.

Start looking around your audience. Pick out ‘friends’ all round the room. If you see an ‘impress me’ person and get discouraged, switch your view back to one of your ‘friend’.

Once you are aware that there are people in your audience who want you to succeed, you’ll be much more likely to succeed.

Voice Modulation:

Microphones, if used effectively will be a great tool for Voice Modulation. Very few of us use them frequently and so, when we have to talk into them in an already nervous state, we can easily make elementary mistakes.

As a general rule, try to speak more clearly when you are using a microphone. It will probably help if you speak a bit slowly. The human voice has four major variables. To hold the audience’s interest and concentration, each of these variables should be modulated.

The variable can be described as four P’s:

Pace: The speed of delivery. A fast passage should be followed by a slow passage.

Pitch: Start deep down. Modulate between high and low.

Power: Vary the power of the voice. For a particularly important passage, drop the power - it can have surprisingly more influence than raising the power.

Pause: Make use of pauses. Give the audience time to collect and to digest a statement.

Following are few basic tips that are useful while using microphone:

• If you have a free-standing mike, step back from it a bit. This will enable you to speak louder and to vary your tone and inflection.

• Don’t turn your head away from the microphone while you are speaking.

• Any little movement you make, such as shuffling your papers, will be amplified by the mike. Cut out the nervous gestures!

• If you are wearing a clip-on mike, make sure it is not rubbing up against some clothing or jewellery. The noise this makes could ruin your presentation.

• If you have a radio-mike, make sure it is switched on when you are presenting and switched off at all other times. This particularly applies when you go to the restroom!

Dealing with Nerves:

Almost everybody is nervous when they stand up to speak. There’s no shame in being nervous. However, if you are too nervous, your anxiety will spread to your audience, making them nervous in turn.
So how can you stop yourself from feeling too nervous?

Here are a few tips:

• Don’t get hung up about being nervous. It’s a normal human reaction.

• Walk off your excessive nervousness. If possible, walk outside and get some fresh air at the same time.

• Don’t let your legs go to sleep. Keep both feet on the floor and lean forward.

• Work your wrists, arms and shoulders to get the tension out of them. Gentle movements, not a major workout, will remove that tension.

• Work your jaw. Gentle side-to-side or circular motion will help to loosen it.

• Repeat positive affirmations quietly to yourself. “I am a good presenter.” It may seem corny but it works.

• Above all, breathe deeply. Make sure your stomach is going out when you breathe in.

Don’t be self-conscious about these warm-up activities. Most good speakers do them. Most people won’t even notice that you are doing them.

Stand Up When You Speak:

First impressions are of critical importance. We know that the listener’s pattern of concentration, whatever his starting level will soon sink drastically.

For most purposes, when you give a presentation you should stand. Not clutching the back of your chair for support, not leaning against the podium but two feet on the floor facing your audience.

Stating Your Purpose:

It is important to state your purpose clearly at the beginning of your talk. Here are some ways to do this:
Talk about: To speak about a topic/subject

• Today, I'd like to talk about our new construction project.
Report on: To tell you about what has been done.

• I'm going to report our quarter results.
Take a look at: To examine

• First, let's take a look at what we have achieved so far.
Tell you about: To speak to someone to give them information or instructions

• When I have finished, Mr. Sharma will then tell you about what is happening in south.
Outline: To give the main facts or information about something.

• I will only give you a brief outline and explain how it affects you.
Give an overview of: To give a short description with general information but no details.

• Firstly, I would like to give you a brief overview of the situation.
Highlight: Draw attention to or emphasize the important fact or facts.

• The results highlight our strengths and our weaknesses.
Discuss: To talk about ideas or opinions on a subject in more detail.

• I'm now going to go on to discuss our options in more detail.

Emphasizing:

Make your presentation more persuasive by making your points stronger. When we are giving lots of information, we often use visuals to give an overview. However, we often need to highlight only one or two key points or figures and then comment on them.

Softening:

Emphasizing is an important part of any speech but sometimes you want to soften the impact of what you are saying and give them less importance.

Here are some ways to do that:

Compare:

We made a huge loss.
We made a loss.
We made a slight loss.
We can soften the impact of negative ideas by responding using a positive word with a negative form of the verb. For example, compare:
The results are disappointing.
The results certainly aren't very encouraging, I'm afraid.

Focusing attention:

When we really want to focus the attention of our audience on an important point, we can use this "What ……. is …."
Look at these examples:
• We must cut costs.
• What we must do is cut costs.
• We need more reliable suppliers.
• What we need are more reliable suppliers.

Cause and effect:

When you are giving a presentation, your job is to not only present the facts but also to give the reasons (why), the purpose (objectives) and the results.

In a presentation, the language used is often very simple, much simpler than if we were writing.

For example:

Reason:

• We sold the land because we needed to release the cash.

Purpose:

• We set up the team to look at possible ways to improve efficiency.

Result:

• We sold the land and had enough cash to invest in new equipment.

Rhetorical questions:

Presentations are more interesting if you use a conversational style. They are livelier and you establish a rapport between you and your audience. You can do this by using a question and answer technique – you ask a question and then answer it. Your questions create sense of participation and guide your audience to your point of view.

For example:

Late delivery is a big problem. What is the best solution?
There can be three two possible solutions. First …
Dealing with questions
At the end of your talk, you are likely to get questions. You don't have to answer all the questions - they may not be good questions!

• If it is a good question, thank the person and answer it.

• Some of the questions may be irrelevant and not connected to what you want to say. Say so and get another question.

• Some may be unnecessary because you have already given the answer. Repeat the answer briefly and get the next question.

• And some may be difficult because you don't have the information. Again, say so and offer to find the information later on.

When you get a question, comment on it. This will give you time to think. Here are some useful expressions to help you do that:

• That's a very interesting question.
• I'm glad you've asked that question.
• A good question.
• I'm sorry but I don't have that information to hand.
• Can I get back to you about that?
• I'm afraid I can't answer that.
• I'm not in a position to comment on that.
• As I said earlier, …
• I think I answered that when I said …
• I did mention that.
• I don't see the connection.
• I'm sorry, I don’t follow you.
• I think that is a very different issue.

Often we feel that we are not in control at question time but remember it is your presentation; you need to control the questions.

Closing Notes:

One never becomes a “perfect” speaker; developing public speaking skills is a life-long experience. But the points discussed here will get you started in becoming the speaker you want to be and the speaker your audience wants to hear

by mona gupta

Can You Undo the Past?

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Wed, 10 Nov 2010 14:16:00 +0000

The more anger towards the past you carry in your heart; the less capable you are of loving in the present.

Barbara de Angelis
You may not be able to undo what has happened in your past but you can let it make a difference in how you live in the future. You may not be able to undo the pain of the past but it doesn't have to still hurt. You may not be able to undo wrong choices but you can stop living with regrets. You may not be able to undo what others have done to you but you can let it go and move on.

There isn't a person on this planet that doesn't have something in their past that they would rather forget and some peopledon't forget. They holdonto it for dear life trying to figure out why, wondering how it's affected them now and wishing things would've been different.

If you took one hundred people off of the street and you each wrote your problems down on a piece of paper then threw them into a big box and then you reached into that box and you had to pick another person's problems; 9 times out of 10 you would wish for your old problems or your old life back.

When you think you've had it bad; trust me there are a lot of people who have had it a lot worse than you. Now that isn't supposed to make you feel better but it is supposed to put your life into perspective.

We've all had our share of heartache, betrayal, bad choices etc. But there are people that can't get beyond what has happened to them. The relive it as if it were yesterday. They point the blame finger so often that it's going to fall off and they can only see backwards.

The sad thing is that they have a choice. "If they don't wake-up they are going to live, dying." When bad things happen, you may not have had a choice in what happened, but you do have a choice in how you are going to deal with it.

You can let it make you stronger or break you down. You can dwell on it to the point of obsession or you can look at it and take from it the lessons you've learned. You can waste your time wishing things were different or you can make your life different from this point forward.

You have the power to take your thoughts in any direction you choose. If you keep looking in the rear view mirrorhow can you ever move ahead? Life isn't always fair, but what's fair about you continuing to torture yourself over something that's over, gone, finito, kaput, in the past?

Just for today get your head out of the past and enjoy your day. Just for today give yourself a break and don't look back, don't think of what if, if only and why.

Instead think of all that you have in your life to be thankful for. Look to your future without the past hanging over your head. Know that no matter what has happened you CAN move on and live a good life.

You can't undo the past but you can make ALL the difference in whether you let it destroy your future. You can't undo the past but you can chalk it up to a part of life, a part of life that may have been brutal, but a part that is dead and gone so bury it and move on.

Go out and enjoy your day instead of dreading each day. Go out with new eyes and see the world with a whole new vision. Go out and don't look back. There is a big world waiting for you if you only step out of the past.

Top Ten Ways To Be Happy In Your Work

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 09:46:00 +0000

1. Do what really interests you!

(This seems like a simple idea, but many times we do work for many other reasons)

2. Decide for yourself what kind of work best fits you.

(There is no shortage of people who will tell you what to do, but this decision should come from you since you will be the one doing the work)

3. Make your work align with the rest of your life, and you won’t notice the difference anymore between vocation and vacation.

(First decide what your vision of your perfect day will be and how that will integrate with the rest of your life)

4. Decide what culture best fits you!

(Most people do the reverse and wonder why they don’t fit well)

5. Select work which you have a passion to be an expert at.

(Better to be an expert in one area vs. just average in many)

6. Listen to your positive inner voice.

(The inner you will always guide you towards the right work for you if you listen carefully)

7. Become more self-aware – make sure that your work aligns with your values and personal goals.

(Many people spend their lives at work which has nothing to do with what is most important to them)

8. Pursue the work which best aligns your abilities (which you are motivated to do) with your deep interests.

(This is much better then pursuing just the money or the job or the career which has a limited time horizon)

9. Be prepared to make big change when doing right work.

(Many times a change in location, lifestyle, and or relationship might be needed to allow for new change in one’s work)

10. Have relationships which nurture you and your work.

(Spending time with people who do not respect your work will drain you)

Follow these steps and you will be happy forever in your work! This seems like a life pursuing, don’t you think!

I'll be cheering you on as you go!

Accomplishing Your Success Plan In Life

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 09:42:00 +0000

What is your success plan? Life is a mystery and different people interpret it differently according to how they perceive life to be. Others remain puzzled by the meaning of life and rather than lead a constructive life, spend their time wishing and asking questionssuch as; what is the essence of life? What is my purpose in life? What is the recipe forsuccess?

I have often heard the saying that, 'lack of planning for success is planning for failure.' To me this is gospel truth. In reality there is no specific recipe fora success plan, as the term is relative but I choose to define success in two terms; purpose and initiative.

Everyone must have a deep longing for something so as to succeed. This desire should not be quenched by anything less but the targeted subject. Individuals should also be self-confident and self-assured of excellence so as to avoid any influence to the contrary. This is because, the environment we live in usually has a shaping effect on your destiny and you must exert control over your life and future to ensure that your success plan is accomplished.

Apart from being purposeful one has to take the initiative to go for the big prize. One should practically go every step of the way towards their desired destination, because any delays and procrastination will automatically mean failure of a success plan. Do not allow nature to take charge and decide the way to go.

Thus if you believe in achievements you must take a positive, voluntary and conscious first step towards fulfilling your dream and success plan. It is worth noting here that success is no ordinary undertaking. If you want it go for it in an extraordinary manner. Put yourself way above your expectations and cross the mediocrity barrier. It is said that those who wash their hands, dine with the kings

A Personal Development Plan Is The Key To Changing Your Life

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 09:25:00 +0000

In order to set your eyes on achieving success in life you need to have a personal development planin place. In this life you will definitely get an opportunity to make an impact and change your life for the better. As a result everyone chooses how to utilize his or her own time depending on their personal reasons.

Whatever your reasons or excuses for not making it in life, I think anybody who dares to waste their time (or in other terms; one who can bear to watch the time go by unused) is not fit to live. I always wonder why some people have so much time that they look for ways of killing it. The sign of someone lacking a personal development plan is easy to see, they would rather find the time to sit down and have their brains and limbs dormant.

The only reason why you have been given time and breath is that you may make use of it and in the right way. Make good use of your opportunities and have in place a good personal development plan and you will never regret later in life. In addition it is only after you look for your purpose in life and seek your usefulness in the world that you will be able to appreciate yourself and thus change your life for the better.

If you have tasted success, then you must know that nothing can be better. When you have been the best then you will never be comfortable in the number two position, leave alone the last. Therefore, always believe that you deserve nothing but the best. Henceforth, work with your utmost vigor by putting in place a decisive personal development plan and dedicate yourself towards leaving your competitors no choice but to follow your lead.

How To Relieve Stress

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Wed, 03 Nov 2010 09:22:00 +0000

The myriad of issues facing us constantly mean we find a good avenue to relief stress. We live a life full of surprises, happy moments as well as challenges. The hope for better prospects keeps us going in the midst of harsh times. Through these hard times, we should always believe in a brighter future.

Nevertheless, sometimes the burdens of life overwhelm us and we feel very discouraged. Fatigue and weariness catches up with us and we sometimes consider giving up. During this time you should never lose hope or allow your problems to set you back instead strive to build your self esteem and look for a way to relief stress.

Whenever you are faced with challenges it is advisable to relief stress by taking some time to relax and thinking positively. Start by analyzing problems and trying to find solutions for them. When your predicaments weigh down on you and you do not seem to find a solution, make sure you share with a close friend and this will help relief stress tremendously. You never know; someone may have the ideal solution for you.

Stress and depression are detrimental to progressing in life and hence it is advisable to develop a positive attitude. It is possible for you to cultivate an inner self-control mechanism thus relief stress. This can be achieved by always ridding your mind of any negative thoughts. Only allow your mind to feed on positive thoughtsand you will be relaxed.

In addition, you will discover that having positive thoughts when faced with problems subconsciously helps relief stress. The magnitude of your situation is also greatly reduced and thus helping you to think soberly. Otherwise, allowing stress and depression to set in will only make you loss the battle to solve issues and you will end up losing the fight to overcome.

Top Seven Laws of Success

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Wed, 13 Oct 2010 02:56:00 +0000

Everyone in the world is born with natural instincts for survival. This is a phenomenon not just limited to man. It is also natural with animals. Many people are at a loss of how to succeed in life. They imagine they only need to work hard to make it.

In fact men has had many beliefs concerning what controls success, with many such beliefs bordering on superstition. However, there are principles that lead to success and these are the focus of the article.

One of the major determinants of success is what you, as a person believes about your ability to succeed. Research studies conducted on determinants of success based on the lives of more than 100 business people shows that success comes about through believing that you have what it takes.

People who have succeeded in business; athletics and any other mission in life have all believed that they can do it. They have refused to believe that it is impossible to achieve their dreams. In the face of multiple failures, they have soldiered on. As a result of their resolve and determination not to give up, they are rewarded with success. They say that fortune favors the brave.

No man is an island. You cannot succeed in life without the cooperation of others. In fact, in life the principle of give and take plays an important role in the functionality of the human being. This is because on your own, you do not possess self-sustaining resources to meet the varied challenges of life. Therefore, you need the support of your friends and neighbors to succeed.

Do well to others and in turn, good will be done to you. Somehow, things will start to work in your favor. Doors that seemed permanently locked will suddenly open on their own volition as you approach them. The goodwill you have created with your fellow man suddenly starts to pay dividends and success comes knocking at your door.

It is of vital importance that you live a life of integrity. How else can people know you are reliable? You have to say what you mean and mean what you say. People who have made up their minds to have integrity as one of the hallmarks of their character will succeed in their endeavors. History has already proven this to us countless times, a great example being Mother Teresa who lived a life of integrity and generosity and achieved so much.

In life, you will go through difficulties. Indeed others have referred to life as being a journey full of mountains and valleys. There are many challenges that you as a human being will go through. However, it is important that you have the ability to face them courageously. You should also know when to pursue a certain course of action and when to change course. You may be pursuing a certain line of business that you really believe in. However, no matter what you may be doing, success has proved to be elusive. This is the time to sit back and evaluate the prevailing circumstances. It could be an opportunity to start something different that may be more rewarding.

The presence of persistent difficulties does not mean that you should give up. History has however proven to us that sometimes misfortunes in life have actually been the same door that led to success. Many do not recognize this, for many times opportunity comes disguised as misfortune.

For you to succeed you must maintain focus on your stated goals. You must determine your course of action and devise strategies that will lead you to achieve that which you have decided to do. Failure is a guarantee for everyone who does not maintain proper attention to the plan at hand. A lack of focus leads to wastage of resources.

Humility is an invaluable quality in your quest to succeed. Pride and arrogance have a way of ensuring that you do not succeed. Humility will attract resources to your camp that albeit would not be available.

Finally, in life how can you succeed without having a purpose? Having a purpose in life gives you the impetus to march on in the face of mounting challenges because you know where you are going.

I hope you found some motivation from the above principles and that you will put them into practice in your own lives, you have nothing to lose.

Planning is important

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 17 Sep 2010 10:36:00 +0000

Planning is important

One Night 4 college students were playing till late night and could not study for the test which was scheduled for the next day. In the morning they thought of a plan. They made themselves look as dirty with grease and dirt. They then went up to the Dean and said that they had gone out to a wedding last night and on their return the tire of their car burst and they had to push the car all the way back and that they were in no condition to appear for the test.
So the Dean said they could have the re-test after 3 days. They thanked him and said they would be ready by that time. On the third day they appeared before the Dean, the Dean said that as this was a Special Condition Test, all four were required to sit in separate classrooms for the test. They all agreed as they had prepared well in the last 3 days.
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The Test consisted of 2 questions with a total of 100 Marks. See Below for the question Paper

Q.1. Name of the car??
.......... .......... ......... (2 MARKS)
Q.2. which tire burst? (98 MARKS)
a) Front Left b) Front Right
c) Back Left d) Back Right

The marriage

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Fri, 17 Sep 2010 10:30:00 +0000

The marriage

when I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce.. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Dew. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Dew so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day,

I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Dew.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce.

She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that everyday for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning.. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Dew about my wife's divorce conditions.. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully..

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mummy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time.. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Dew about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mum out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Dew opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Dew, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead.. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Dew, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other any more. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Dew seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead.

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage!

If you don't share this, nothing will happen to you.

If you do, you just might save a marriage.

Many of life's failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.

Thank you and have a nice day.

The Excellence

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Sat, 28 Aug 2010 10:35:00 +0000

The Excellence

A German once visited a temple under construction where he saw a sculptor making an idol of God. Suddenly he noticed a similar idol lying nearby. Surprised, he asked the sculptor, "Do you need two statues of the same idol?" "No," said the sculptor without looking up, "We need only one, but the first one got damaged at the last stage." The gentleman examined the idol and found no apparent damage. "Where is the damage?" he asked. "There is a scratch on the nose of the idol." said the sculptor, still busy with his work. "Where are you going to install the idol?"

The sculptor replied that it would be installed on a pillar twenty feet high. "If the idol is that far, who is going to know that there is a scratch on the nose?" the gentleman asked... The sculptor stopped his work, looked up at the gentleman, smiled and said, "I will know it."

The desire to excel is exclusive of the fact whether someone else appreciates it or not. "Excellence" is a drive from inside, not outside. Excellence is not for someone else to notice but for your own satisfaction and efficiency.

The Making Of A Mother

noreply@blogger.com (anjani kumar soni) — Tue, 17 Aug 2010 13:05:00 +0000

The Making Of A Mother

By the time the Lord made mothers, He was into the sixth day working overtime. An Angel appeared and said "Why are you spending so much time on this one?"

And the Lord answered and said, "Have you read the spec sheet on her? She has to be completely washable, but not elastic; have 200 movable parts, all replaceable; run on black coffee and leftovers; have a lap that can hold three children at one time and that disappears when she stands up; have a kiss that can cure anything from a scraped knee to a broken heart; and have six pairs of hands."

The Angel was astounded at the requirements for this one. "Six pairs of hands! No way!" said the Angel.

The Lord replied, "Oh, it's not the hands that are the problem. It's the three pairs of eyes that mothers must have!"

"And that's on the standard model?" the Angel asked.

The Lord nodded in agreement, "Yep, one pair of eyes are to see through the closed door as she asks her children what they are doing even though she already knows. Another pair in the back of her head are to see what she needs to know even though no one thinks she can. And the third pair are here in the front of her head. They are for looking at an errant child and saying that she understands and loves him or her without even saying a single word."

The Angel tried to stop the Lord "This is too much work for one day. Wait until tomorrow to finish."

"But I can't!" The Lord protested, "I am so close to finishing this creation that is so close to my own heart. She already heals herself when she is sick AND can feed a family of six on a pound of hamburger and can get a nine year old to stand in the shower."

The Angel moved closer and touched the woman, "But you have made her so soft, Lord."

"She is soft," the Lord agreed, "but I have also made her tough. You have no idea what she can endure or accomplish."

"Will she be able to think?" asked the Angel.

The Lord replied, "Not only will she be able to think, she will be able to reason, and negotiate."

The Angel then noticed something and reached out and touched the woman's cheek. "Oops, it looks like You have a leak with this model. I told You that You were trying to put too much into this one."

"That's not a leak." the Lord objected. "That's a tear!"

"What's the tear for?" the Angel asked.

The Lord said, "The tear is her way of expressing her joy, her sorrow, her disappointment, her pain, her loneliness, her grief, and her pride."

The Angel was impressed. "You are a genius, Lord. You thought of everything for this one. You even created the tear!"

The Lord looked at the Angel and smiled and said, "I'm afraid you are wrong again. I created the woman, but she created the tear!"