Fragility of life

It’s interesting when we look at ourselves and our lives. We get angry or are upset about rather seemingly trivial things in the whole scheme of everything, when you really look at it.

Unfortunately, when tragedy strikes it puts so much into perspective. I should preface this by mentioning that a little over a week ago I lost a dear friend of well over 30 years. She was only in her mid 50′s. I’ve buried my parents, but this is the first time that I’ve had to bury such a close long-time friend.

We should frequently remind ourselves of the importance of keeping our problems in perspective. Sadly, life has a way of reminding us periodically of how petty most of our own inconveniences really are. The unimportance of the things that had upset us so much only a minute earlier become apparent when tragedy rears its ugly head.

All of us, every day, spend a great deal of time worrying about minor annoyances that ultimately mean nothing. Sometimes it takes this kind of tragedy to jolt us into the reality of that realization.

I’m sure I will soon be getting upset about trivial things again, human nature being what it is. But maybe I will find it within me, even in the midst of that distress, to maintain a better sense of perspective.

There is a psalm in the Old Testament that says to “Teach us to count our days wisely, that we may obtain a wise heart.” It’s interesting because of the phrase “wise heart.” Normally we associate wisdom with the mind, not the heart. Making our mind understand what’s really important in life is the easy part; it’s getting our heart to go along, that’s the real challenge.

We ask ourselves, “How could such a thing happen?” and “Why?” But we have to remember that at the end of the day we are only human.

What can we learn from this? That our grasp on life is tenuous at best. None of us knows when our time is up. We can take every conceivable precaution, but even such an approach does not negate the possibility of a sudden death at any time. This reinforces the fact that we must make optimal use of every moment of every day. We must approach every day as though it may be our last.

Life is so precious and beautiful. It is indeed a gift for it is here one day and generally taken for granted. Give someone you love a hug. Tell them you appreciate them. But don’t do it later or tomorrow – DO IT NOW! Later or tomorrow just may be too late!

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Fear and love are the two most basic human emotions.  They can not coexist as they are polar opposites.  Where one is the other cannot be.  When one enters the room, the other exits.

Fear is denoted by lies, deception, violence, hate and anger.  While love embodies truth, innocence and personal freedom.  They can produce extremes.  Fear can create one to kill another, whereas love inspires one dying for another.

Fear is defined as a distressing negative sensation induced by a perceived threat, whether real or imagined.  It is said that fear is related to the specific behaviors of escape and avoidance and can affect our daily lives if we let it get out of control in our consciousness.  Fear, or more so anxiety, is related to a future event.

OK, so with this known, how do we calm those fears?  How many times have you done something that you may have had a fear about & yet afterward said to yourself, ‘Oh, that wasn’t so bad after all!’  You probably created more anxiety and angst beforehand than was necessary.

What has fear of failure stopped you from doing? 

We all have problems – that’s a given.  You may think the person next to you doesn’t, but they do just like you and me.  It’s the way they deal with their fear that’s the difference.  You may be frightened to try something new for fear of failure.  We worry about our family and friends.  Some of us have a hard time picking up after a breakup.  You’re not alone.  You may feel you are, but it’s only your mind telling you so.  You’re neither dysfunctional nor crazy.  You’re only human and there are steps you must go through – the grieving process.  It is said that time heals all wounds.  It may not seem like that’s possible, but it does!

We all make mistakes in life.  It’s what you take away from the lesson you learned, because of that mistake, that will help you grow.  If you allow your fear to take over, you may corner yourself into a box with no hopes, no dreams and no way out!!  You will be doing yourself one of the greatest disservices if you allow this to happen.  There is a solution of every problem.  It may not be evident or on your fingertips, but it is out there to be found.  You can’t have great achievements without many failures prior to that.

Sometimes you just have to go for it and put your fears aside.  What will you have lost besides some time?  Yet, you may have learned a lesson along the way that might allow you to be closer the next time you try.

Many will not get out of their comfort zone because of their fears and fear of failure.  But if you don’t you’re just stuck, like the hamster on the wheel in it’s cage.  You will be stymied and idle with no or little progress.

Try something new!  Try something different!  It might end up being one of the greatest experiences in your life, but you’ll never know unless you try.  I’m not saying that you have to go all gung ho.  You’ll most likely accomplish more by taking a lot of tiny steps and enjoy the journey.

Love & Fear

One of the best self-help books I’ve read is titled, ‘Choice Theory’ by William Glasser.  Life is a series of choices.  We can choose how we wish to deal with a situation.  We can choose how we wish to react to others.  We can choose whether we wish to be depressed or not.  We can choose if we wish to be happy or not.  We can choose if we wish to come from love or fear!

We can make an active choice to come from love and not fear.  Many of our choices come from past experiences that we’ve been taught or learned on our own.  But they shouldn’t all be set in stone.  Some of them need to be relearned.  I’m not suggesting that you throw everything out the window, but we evolve as does time and we need to adapt.  That is unless you want to live in that box we spoke about.

Love is the way to inner peace.  Love is light, fear is darkness.  When you turn the light on, there is no more darkness.

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Recently, I read the following, “Whatever your problem or challenge may be, laugh at it. Laugh long and hard. Because you are forever and it is temporary.”  OK, so we are not really forever on this earth, but the reality of it is that this rings so true! It’s a matter of perspective! Our outlook portends our future and destiny!!  If you think negative thoughts, you’re outcome will mostly be negativity.  Conversely, if you have a positive outlook this can help reduce stress by eliminating, what some call, negative self-talk.  As you can see, our outlook, whether positive or negative, may affect our health.

The health benefits of positivity could include a longer life span and better psychological and physical well being possibly leading to better resistance to the common cold and lower rates of distress and depression.

Now this doesn’t mean that we ignore the unpleasantries of life.  They are going to be there.  That is just a part of life and living.  But our outlook and how we handle them is the difference.  If you have a more positive outlook you will handle these unpleasantries in a more productive way, and most likely again, with less stress!

The long and short of it is that we create our own destinies.  Yes, there are outside influences, but it is only us who hold the reigns and ultimately have the control.  Our outlook and attitude will guide the paths that we take.  This transcends all aspects of our lives.

While putting this together I read a post on Facebook and it led me to this post, 30 Things to Stop Doing to Yourself.   It started, “As Maria Robinson once said, “Nobody can go back and start a new beginning, but anyone can start today and make a new ending.”  Some pretty awesome and powerful stuff, yet quite simplistic as well.  I’m checking out some of their other posts as well.

With that said, have an awesomely, powerful New Year!!  It’s all up to us!!

Till next time….Marc It Sold!

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Relationships are a very important aspect of our lives.  They come in the form of friendships, working relationships, romantic, etc.  This has obviously been something on my mind and I thought I’d share it with you.  At the same time I look forward to your comments as well.  I am always willing to learn as I feel that is the basis of life and growing.

WHAT’S THE DEAL WITH RELATIONSHIPS? 

I feel that they should be easy.  That if you love each other – you do for each other.  I don’t expect it to be equal.  One will do more on one end and other on another.  So therefore, an equality derives somehow.  Aren’t you supposed to be partners?

Yes, I know any relationship will have it’s ups and downs and that there will be work involved.  Any worthwhile relationship will involve some effort at one point or another.  This is life!  What doesn’t have it’s ups and downs?

IS YOUR RELATIONSHIP WORK OR EFFORT?

Work

There is a common myth that good relationships are hard work.

The first definition of work that I came across states, “exertion or effort directed to produce or accomplish something; labor, toil.”  After reading this definition I have a problem using the word ‘work’ and relationship together.

You work to make money. You work to have a nice yard.

What kind of work should a relationship require?

Commitment? That is not work, that comes naturally with the right partner. Pleasing the partner? Again, if it is work, perhaps your partner is too demanding. Little things should not have ‘work’ attached to them.

My theory is that with the right partner, you should not have any work. You both enjoy each other’s company.

Effort

Now ‘effort’ is another story.  Everything, technically, requires effort – sitting upright, reading this, breathing.  These use all kinds of small efforts.

Life takes effort in every aspect. Whether you feel it should be a burden or a pleasure is up to you. Effort can be pleasurable.

Sometimes it can be the greatest pleasure possible to be allowed to make an effort for the sake of someone you love. Being asked to give more than you want to give or to make more effort than you want to make is not much fun and I don’t think it’s a necessary element in a relationship at all. I would not want to feel like that, nor would I want my partner to feel like that,

Anything worth having, is something worth making an effort towards. 

You get what you put into it – if both try and put the effort in, it will bring you closer together because it’s mutual.  You’re working together towards a goal to make each other happy.  Granted, no one can make us happy, but ourselves.

Put in nothing, and that’s exactly what they will get out – nothing.
Sorry but I’m of the opinion that the more compatible you are in interests and values and compliment each other’s strengths & weaknesses the less effort a relationship takes.

Yes, there should be some work involved. You can’t get good at something unless you work at it. But, there’s work that you do which you enjoy doing, and there’s work you do which you don’t enjoy.

If you have to work at it too much, you’re probably not enjoying it very much.  The more effort you put into just getting along with the other person, the less worthwhile it undoubtedly will be and the less enjoyment you will get out of it.

So, are good relationships hard?  Well, they shouldn’t be!

COMMON ELEMENTS NECESSARY FOR A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP

A healthy relationship leads to a much happier life. It gives us the feeling of knowing that no matter what we go through as individuals, we will never have to face it alone. Healthy relationships provide a more positive outlook on life. Healthy relationships don’t just happen on their own – it takes both people to cooperate.

Here are what I feel are some elements of a healthy relationship:

Communication

Communication involves several aspects.  Not only is it important to express your feelings to your partner, but it is just as important to LISTEN to your partner and hear their feelings as well.  Remember, it takes two and many times there will be different viewpoints.

If you don’t wish to express it verbally, then send an email or text.  if you sense something is amiss with your partner or family member, initiate communication by asking if anything is ‘wrong.’ If they say ‘no,’ don’t press the issue. You left the lines of communication open for them to come to you when they are ready.

If you or your part­ner are not com­mu­ni­cat­ing there’s some ques­tions to ask.  For starters why is there a break­down in com­mu­ni­ca­tion?  Sure, any num­ber of rea­sons could exist.  The bot­tom line is if there is no com­mu­ni­ca­tion there will be no relationship.

Sometimes we hold our tongues for fear of upsetting the other party.  While this might make things easier in the short term, in the long run it gradually erodes the foundation of the relationship. Little issues grow into bigger and bigger problems.  Ultimately, keeping quiet reflects a lack of trust — and that’s the death of a relationship.

We need to learn how to communicate love in a way that our partner not only hears it, but feels it as well.

Trust

Trust means putting confidence in someone other than you. Trust is the foundation of any successful relationship regardless of whether it’s your friend, family member or partner. To have a healthy relationship, you need to trust in your own abilities to make sound decisions, as well as be confident in the other party’s loyalty to you. When that trust has been betrayed, a crack occurs in that foundation and both parties need to work together to repair that which has been broken.

Trust deepens over time. Couples who are able to trust each other don’t have to deal with insecurities between each other. They’re able to speak freely and be themselves, knowing that their partner loves them for it.

Respect

You have to respect each other and the different viewpoints that we all possess.  Would you really want someone the same as you?  With common respect your partner may feel more comfortable to express their innermost feelings to you.

Our tendency to disregard the feelings, concern and sense of importance of others tends to erode the relationship with them.

Respect is an acknowledgement we extend to another. We always have to take into account the feelings of others as we interact with them. A sound relationship will always require respect for each other.

Give respect, and you will be respected in return.

With respect also comes common courtesy.

Honesty

Honesty is one of the most basic of all elements to any healthy relationship. A deep and loving honesty between two people says, “No matter what happens, you will always know the true me.” This feeling allows couples to open up and be the best they can be with each other

Honesty is telling “the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth.”  Completely!!  Unfortunately, we’re taught to make lying a part of our lives.  I’m not talking about the big lies, but more about the consistent, persistent “lies of omission” and “white lies” we tell people almost everyday.  This is not healthy in a loving relationship

Self-esteem

Loving yourself is one of the most significant of all the elements of a healthy relationship. If you are not happy with who you are, how can you expect someone else to be happy with you. Learn to love yourself and let go of insecurities and trust issues. Be confident in yourself. Love yourself and give your partner those same reasons to love you back.

CHOICES

There’s no right or wrong in a relationship as you are separate entities.  Whatever you have together, you still need to remain true to your self.  When you take a look at it, there are three entities here – you, me and us.

There will be ups and downs and in-betweens. But as long as you come together in the end, all is well. A little shower or thunderstorm here and there shouldn’t ruin the sunshine that comes out after.  For your partner should be your “ray of sunshine!”

When it is right, there is not a lot of fighting and arguing. You shouldn’t have to ‘work’ too hard to be happy together! Some problems are normal, but not constant ones!

Above all remember that it comes down to choices.  Everything you do in life comes down to the choice that you make at that time.  Don’t try to change someone.  You have no right to try to do so!  The only thing that you can change are you, your choices and how you wish to act or react.

Wishing you a Happy, Healthy Relationship and much love!!

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She was an addict!  Her addictions included drugs and alcohol.  Many people with addictions tend to be running away or hiding from something. In many cases the drug takes over and all too often after so much heavy use, the person does not feel ‘normal’ unless they are high.

There are addicts out there that do see this and what they’ve done to themselves and those around them.  They want better for themselves and have the will power to change and forego the drugs, etc.  This is not an easy road.

You can physically make someone go to rehab, but if it wasn’t their idea and choice, then it’s probably for naught!  They will most likely get very little out of it & just return the streets doing the same thing they were doing before if not moreso.  An addict has to come to the crossroads that they not only want but need help!

Once there, then they can start on the road to recovery.

As always….Marc It Sold!…

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It would be another 11 years before the new Constitution was adopted and then the ensuing Bill of Rights, where under the First Amendment, we were given among many things the Freedom of Speech.

Yet our freedom of expression appears to give many, or so they feel, the right to act like spoiled brats!!

The reason I say this is because of the way that we treat our President.  I don’t care what your political affiliation is or whether you like the President or not, but this person deserves our respect!!  This person was voted in, right or wrong in your eyes, by the majority of votes (ok, so generally so).  This person is our President, our leader; and therefore, this person deserves our respect and support.

I’m not saying that we have to agree with this person, but to belittle and belie them in national forums such as Facebook, is downright rude and complete and utter bs.  I don’t agree with everything our President’s do & will sometimes write about such, but I’ll have facts and theories supporting my suppositions.

Yes, I know we’ve come a long way in our technical world with the plethora of available information and a multitude of ways to disseminate it all over the internet and blogosphere.  It’s absolutely awesome if you take the time to think about it.

But look back 20, 30, 40 years ago.  None of our Presidents were dissected as much as they are now.  As I’ve previously mentioned, I don’t always agree with our President of choice, but this is whom we’ve all elected.

I’m sure their job is not as much fun as we’d all like to believe.  In fact, I think it’s much glorified as with other heads of state as well.  Seriously, look at the pictures of Presidents and see how they’ve aged in their 4 or 8 years in office.  That in itself should tell you how difficult the job is.  They are making decisions that affect millions upon millions of Americans.  No matter what you political affiliation is, that is an awesome responsibility and task, and I doubt if any of them take any of it lightly!!

I could go on and on about this topic.  Seriously, we’ve had some Presidents that we’ve revered and still are to this day, that have made colossal mistakes and errors of judgment that have even put us in danger.  But because of our lack of technology during their tenure, we didn’t tie them to the whipping post.

Look at some of the buffoons, that in recent years and currently, wish to run for the Office of President.  But this is a part of Freedom of Speech.  Do we berate them as much as we do the President?

Yes, I can understand why we hold our President to a higher standard, as we should.  But we should also support our President as well.  Yes, most of us are probably from dysfunctional families, but does that give us a right to be a dysfunctional nation?

We are part of a Democracy.  If you don’t like who’s been voted into office, than freakin’ vote them out next time.  Oh wait, did you even vote at all!  Then don’t complain if you didn’t!

What happened to compassion and respect?  Have we grown beyond that?  Grow up America!  As I’ve learned in business, maybe it’s also time for our nation, society and culture to go Back to Basics.  I think we could learn so much more about ourselves and our neighbors.

Wishing all a very happy and safe 4^th of July!

Viva la Independen!!

As always….Marc It Sold!…and have an absolutely wonderful day!!!

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It’s amazing to me.  A week ago I was tumbling down into the depths of an abyss, and yet a couple of days later, I found myself climbing a mountainside reaching for its heights!  Life is grand!  Especially, when you have such caring & loving true friends!!

What does the word ‘friend’ mean to you?

According to Dictionary.com, the definition is, “a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard.”

I am a very, very rich and lucky man!  I’ve always known that I have some very close people in my life that care very much about me and my well-being.  But, I never, never realized how so very much loved I am.  I always knew that a few of these people loved & cared for me, but the extent to which it went is still mind-boggling to me.  This may sound crazy, but I don’t see where I deserve that much attention.  I know that I’m good to my friends and will go out of my way for them and even beyond where most would go, but to have this returned in such great enormity defies comprehension to me.

I generally put myself out there and my life is an open book.  This is how I’ve always been.  I don’t believe in secrets and as most of my friends have heard me say at one time or another – “I yam what I yam” as Popeye would say.

So that you may understand more clearly, a little background may be in order.  I had found myself in a situation with a person who called themself a friend.  I truly believe that they were as much of one as they could be.  Unfortunately there came a comfort level of being friends for quite a while & I found myself being taken advantage of.  Yes, there were other feelings involved, but that’s really neither here nor there.  Because I believed in this person as a friend, I would elide over the many transgressions that occurred over this long period of time.  Unfortunately, this was to my detriment and I was deeply hurt.  And this is by someone that I considered a very close and dear friend who would be there for the rest of our days on this planet.  So for me, this has been a difficult pill to swallow.

I won’t deny that writing this is somewhat uplifting to me and kind of cathartic at the same time.

While on the way down its slippery slope it was difficult to see clearly, even though I thought I was being completely rational and realistic.  But with the help of ‘Friends,’ I was able to see the light more clearly in all its clarity.  It really just doesn’t get any better than that – does it!?!  What more can a person ask for?  As a friend wrote, “without lows, you can’t judge the highs.”

Our friends are so much more a measure of our wealth than dollars in the bank or any other materialistic goods.  You can’t put a monetary value on friendship!!  You can’t quantitate it.  Yet, at the same time, it’s not the quantity of the friendships that matters, but the quality of those that are really ‘true friends.’

What does the word ‘friend’ conjure up in your mind? To me the faces of the people that I love come to mind first.

Recently, in the Orlando Sentinel, there was an article A Friendly Reminder.

According to the article, “a 2006 study from the American Sociological Review reported that 23 percent of us don’t have a single close confidant, and nearly 20 percent have only one.  Clearly a confidant crisis, with nearly half of us in serious short supply. Over the past two decades, in fact, the number of Americans without even one confidant has tripled, and the average number of confidants has dropped from three to two.”

This boggled my mind.  I have a few friends that I am in contact with daily.  They know what is going on in my life as I do theirs.  Amongst them, there is one that we talk at length daily.  Before a dear friend passed away a couple of years ago, we always had out 10:30am talk and this went on for years.

So it amazes me and at the same time I have to come to the conclusion of how lonely of a society have we become.  Is this a result of progress?  Have we really lost so much of our interpersonal skills? Unfortunately, but technology, as I guess with everything else when you really look at it, appears to be a bane and bonus at the same time.

Where the problem then lies is with us!  Many of us have lost the art of conversation.  Many of us have tended to hide behind the keyboard rather than face-to-face communication.  It’s easier to text someone a simple phrase or two, rather than pick up the phone.  Why?  Wouldn’t you rather hear their voice and inflection? A text or email cannot show that inflection in their voice.  It can’t tell you if that person is happy or sad.  You can’t read those qualities.  It’s not like reading a book with descriptive text.  But it’s easier and for some it allows them to isolate themselves from being further involved in the other person.

Friendship vs. Acquaintance

Are you my Friend?  Do I know you? There are differently levels of friendship as well as there are different levels of love.

With the advent of social media and it’s ever growing popularity, it seems that these two terms have lost their particular meanings.  It seems that everyone is my friend or wants to be my friend on Facebook.  On Twitter, they are called followers, but are still referred to as friends.  Many people are carrying this over into everyday life calling everyone that they know a friend.  But are you really my friend?

The word ‘friend’ was generally known to be a noun, but is now used as a verb and is recognized as such in many dictionaries, as in ‘to friend’ and even ‘unfriend’ someone, especially on Facebook.  Now, granted, it has been used as a verb in that we would sometimes say ‘to befriend’ someone.  Also, while doing a little research, it’s been noted that the word ‘unfriend’ is not totally new in that it was used in the late 13^th through 19^th century as meaning an enemy.

The definition of ‘acquaintance’ is ‘a person known to one, but usually not a close friend.’

Some people are simply acquaintances. Some are “fair weather” friends. Some are friends when it’s convenient. There are some who are extremely friendly only when they need something from you.

Friendships don’t just happen. They require attention, nurturing, love and energy to create them and keep them alive.

True friends will not judge you and will easily forgive and have compassion & love for you. They will support you and help you shine.

What is a friend to you?

What do your friends mean to you?

I wish you the wealth of friends that I am so very lucky to have.  For without friends, what are we really? Can we exist without friends – Sure!  But what kind of life would that be – other than just an existence.  Granted, my friends do not define who and what I am, but they surely do tell a story of my life and how I’ve lived it.  I am such a very rich man and love my friends dearly!!

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Unfortunately, with every good program, there are those out there that will try to find scams to enrich themselves at the cost of everyone else. This is true with this program as well and the IRS (Internal Revenue Service) is examining questionable claims. Of course, this adds more expense to the program which is generally thought to cost approximately $1B per month.

Mixed Reviews – the Dow’s been toying with the 10K mark and we’ve seen some steps toward improvement in the real estate industry, yet, unemployment figures and foreclosures are putting a damper on any kind of thought of a quick recovery. We are experiencing the longest recession since the ‘30’s and the worst unemployment rate in 26 years.

Now it could be worse, but how do you tell that to your neighbor who’s out of work and in jeopardy of losing their home? I have a dear friend who’s been out of work for 6 months, but what makes this situation worse is that he has a roommate who is not only out of work but also dealing with chemotherapy. Now he’s in jeopardy of eventually losing his home and doesn’t know what he can do to help the roommate.

This is just one situation, yet there are many, many like this and these are our neighbors and friends.

OK, so now with all that doom & gloom said, the National Association of Business Economics (NABE) released a report last week in which more than 80% of economists surveyed believe that the recession is over & we are starting a period of expansion. Granted, the unemployment rate and federal deficit are expected to remain somewhat high through 2010.

Additionally, they expect overall housing prices to increase by 2% and that 2010 will be the first year since ’05 that the housing industry will contribute to the nation’s overall growth.

Many economists believe that we’ve exited the recession during the last quarter and that we are entering the recovery period. The situation that we currently find ourselves in did not occur overnight. It took years to create and will take more than just a few quarters of growth to repair it.

Till next time….Marc It Sold!

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This is just absolutely ridiculous! That we as a society have stooped to this level is abominable. Shame on us! If this is the only way for some to get their point across with misinformation and the selling of fear, then we should be ashamed. What happened to good old debates? Yes, even then each side would have their own slant, but not a total distortion of the facts.

If we took a poll today, I doubt if 50% of the people could accurately relate what ‘end of life counseling’ or ‘single-payer system’ means.

Before we even get into that, what’s being discussed as healthcare reform is in reality health insurance reform. The insurance companies have run amok. I have no problem with a corporation making a profit. That’s capitalism as it should be. But you want to talk about death squads, well they are the real culprits. Insurance companies make life and death decisions about what coverages they will allow us based on the cost-benefit, but not to the insured, to the corporation and of course their good old actuarial tables. Yet, they have deep pockets (profiting from us) and lobbyists so all we are hearing is the rhetoric that they are spewing, which carries very little truth.

Pres. Obama did not say that government would make decisions about who gets care. Actually, quite the opposite. He said, “I don’t want bureaucracies making those decisions.” He also said, “The point is we want to use science, we want doctors and medical experts to be making decisions that all too often right now are driven by skewed policies, by outdated means of reimbursement, or by insurance companies.”

I think it’s very important for seniors to have counseling in regard to options, especially when it comes to Hospice care. I used them when I knew it was time for my mother. They were there for pain management and their goal was to make her comfortable so she could pass, when the time came, in her own home, not in a hospital bed with strangers, tubes and machines.

Comparing a single-payer system to socialism is absurd. One has absolutely nothing to do with the other. A socialized health care system is one in which all health care facilities and personnel are owned and operated by the government. A single-payer system refers to the funding of health care, not the services rendered. An example of such in the U.S. is Medicare. It is a single-payer system, not socialized medicine.

The difference between our present single-payer system, Medicare, and that of other countries such as a Canada, is that ours is for seniors and the disabled whereas theirs is a universal health care. In simplistic terms, we are just talking about our system, but on a larger scale.

People! Take the initiative to research what is being discussed instead of listening to pundits. It doesn’t take long to Google any of these topics mentioned here. The news is now big entertainment. With the proliferation of all the channels on the television, all these so-called pundits need to attract viewers. The majority can’t do that by just giving us the facts & letting us come to our own conclusions. It’s about sensationalism, whether it be from the right, left or middle.

While researching this post, I came across a very informative site www.FactCheck.org. It is produced by the Annenberg Public Policy Center of the University of Pennsylvania. Want to learn more about Health Care and debunk some of the myths, check it out.

Till next time….Marc It Sold!

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This could be a long convoluted series of articles, but I’ll try to summarize what’s occurring in the appraisal industry.

Yes, we all know of the fallout with subprime loans & homes being grossly overvalued.

Short history… Lenders used to work very closely with certain appraisers. As everything was going crazy they told their appraisers to appraise a property for the value that the lender wanted otherwise they would use someone else. This was the appraisers’ lifeline, so they had to do such. And therefore, values went up and up and in many cases at astronomical rates.

We know what happened with most of those loans and are seeing the fallout of such. Unfortunately, in their efforts to correct a wrong, those in charge are going too far and after the incorrect parties. Andrew Cuomo, Attorney General of New York, helped push us to HVCC (Home Valuation Code of Conduct) which went into effect May 1.

Update… Now lenders have to go through a management company who in turn mete out appraisals. The problem here is that this company takes a portion (40% or more) of the cost of the appraisal. You have to understand that the management company is profit oriented, so you can only gather that they choose the lowest bidder. Now seriously, think of this. How do you expect to get quality work for minimum bid? I’m not saying it can’t happen, but …

Many of these appraisals are being performed by appraisers who are outside of the market. Therefore, they are most likely not as well informed on those current market conditions and nuances that affect each individual market.

To further complicate matters, I cannot talk to the appraiser, nor can the lender or anyone else who’s considered ‘an interested party’ in the transaction. So if I want the appraiser to take into consideration other comparables, I would have to contact the management company with this information.

Now, there is a way around this, go VA or FHA. You see, HVCC only applies to loans of 1 – 4 family residential units that are sold by Fannie Mae & Freddie Mac.

The use of HVCC is affecting all of us, not only the lender, appraisers and Realtors, but also YOU – the buyers, sellers and homeowners.

The market has been correcting itself. Sales have risen, the inventory is dropping and median and average sales prices are in many cases progressing in an upward trend. With the use of HVCC we are seeing many homes being undervalued and therefore the ensuing loss of value to the community and in many instances prospective sales that are not coming to fruition.

There is a move about for an 18-month moratorium to HVCC. This is necessary for the market to continue to correct itself. This is also necessary for HVCC to be corrected itself. Our legislators need to do the right thing to help us protect our home values.

Till next time….Marc It Sold!

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