Table of contents for Guilt-Free Confidence

1. Guilt-Free Confidence Part 1
2. Guilt-Free Confidence Part 2

Continuing with the second part of our post on Guilt-Free Confidence, let’s look at 2 benefits from a guilt-free, confident relationship with God.

(If you missed Part 1 of Guilt-Free Confidence, please use the series link above to go there now.)

When you exist in a guilt-free relationship with God, it changes how you communicate with God in prayer.

Look at this beautiful quote from Heb 4:15,16 about confidence in your relationship with God.

For we do not have a High Priest [reference to Jesus] who is unable to understand and sympathize and have a shared feeling with our weaknesses and infirmities and liability to the assaults of temptation, but One who has been tempted in every respect as we are, yet without sinning. Let us then fearlessly and confidently and boldly draw near to the throne of grace (the throne of God’s unmerited favor to us sinners), that we may receive mercy for our failures and find grace to help in good time for every need, appropriate help and well-timed help, coming just when we need it.

Remember what I said about guilt in the beginning of this post? Guilt is a type of fear that keeps you from living at your best in a relationship. When you realize that God has removed your guilt and you live in a firm, safe relationship with Him, that confidence changes all your conversation with Him. You freely come to God with your needs, feeling confident in His help. The word “confidence” in the Hebrews 4 quote is the Greek term, “parrhesia,” meaning “outspokenness, bluntness, boldness of speech, freely, openly, plainly.” A clear understanding of your relationship with God will cause you to be confident enough to talk freely and plainly with God about your needs, desires, and dreams.

When you exist in a guilt-free relationship with God, it changes the level of prayers that you see answered.

Remember in Matthew 9:29 what Jesus said regarding results from our prayers, “According to your faith it will be done to you.” When you realize that you have a firm, safe relationship with God upon which you trust and rely, such confidence greatly increases your faith. You believe in God’s loving care for you. You believe that He listens to your prayers and follows through with the promises to you that you see in scripture. As a result, you freely come to God with your needs, feeling completely confident in His help or having “faith”, and thus receive the answers to your prayers. According to your faith – your trust and reliance on the relationship with Him – the answers to your prayers take place.

1. Greek definitions were taken from Strong’s Dictionary of New Testament Words.
2. Meriam-Webster Dictionary
3. thefreedictionary.com

Table of contents for Guilt-Free Confidence

1. Guilt-Free Confidence Part 1
2. Guilt-Free Confidence Part 2

Feelings of guilt hinder the quality of our relationships, both in the natural and spiritual realms. God desires that you live your life in confidence, free from guilt!

Guilt is a hindrance in any relationship. A person does not act according to the giftings of his personality, the best that he is capable of, when suffering from guilt, because it is a form of fear. It makes the person fear more conflict with the other person or fear failure when facing similar type situations as in the past. Guilt also often causes one to give in to manipulation from controlling people’s selfish desires, even when the decision is against his better judgment.

In one’s relationship with God, guilt also keeps a person from interacting in a healthy manner, creating a lack of confidence in  interactions with Him, a confidence which God Himself desires us to have! If you feel that you have not already received forgiveness from God for past failures, or are struggling with the feeling that God is holding the past against you, please read the post, Hold on to Forgiveness Instead of Failure, before finishing this article. This post will deal with God’s descriptions of interacting with Him through a perspective of guilt-free confidence.

God clearly expresses His desire that each of us enjoy a continual, favorable relationship with Him.

In the following quote from Romans 5:1,2,5, God states that He desires us to grasp the fact that we can “hold [on to] and enjoy” a relationship of peaceful reconciliation with Him.

Rom. 5:1,2,5 Since we are acquitted and given a right standing with God through faith, let us grasp the fact that we have the peace of reconciliation to hold and to enjoy through Jesus. Through Him we have by faith into this state of God’s favor in which we firmly and safely stand. Let us rejoice in our hope of experiencing and enjoying the glory of God…..Such hope never disappoints us…

The easiest way to cover the wealth contained in this quote is to list the various points based on the meaning of the key words in the original Greek with which they were written.

1. The Greek word for the phrase “peace of reconciliation” is “eirene,” containing the emotional states of quietness and rest as well as “set at one again” or reconciled.(1) Reconciliation is defined as either “restoring harmony in a friendship”(2) or “re-establishing a close relationship.”(3) God wants us to grasp the fact that, as far as He is concerned, there is rest and harmony in the close relationship between you and Him, and He wants you to live in the enjoyment of that fact.

2.You may think, “How can I feel such harmony between myself and God after all my failures?” The first phrase in the quote explains how. “Faith” in God gives you a right standing with Him. In the Greek, “faith” or “pistis” is your “moral conviction of the truthfulness of God, especially reliance upon Christ for salvation, as well as constancy in such profession.”(1) The Romans 5 quote is part of a discussion in chapter 4 on Abraham being the father of faith because he “believed God and it was credited to his account as righteousness and right standing with God (Rom.4:3,22;Gen.15:6).”

3. Your faith (reliance, continual trust) in God’s forgiveness allows you to be “acquitted” by God of your past failures, just as when a jury “acquits” an accused person, freeing him of all guilt. The discussion in Romans 4 on Abraham ends by saying, the words about Abraham’s faith giving him a right standing with God were not written for his sake alone, “but for our sakes, too. Right standing with God will be granted to us also who believe, trust in, adhere to, and rely on God who raised Jesus from the dead, who was betrayed and put to death because of our misdeeds…absolving us from all guilt before God.”

Let’s focus back on our original quote and paraphrase it, “Because of your faith or trust in God’s acquittal or removal of our guilt, He desires you to grasp the fact that you can enjoy a restored, close harmonious relationship with Him.”

4. The “state of God’s favor” in which you firmly and safely stand by faith is the word often translated as “grace.” The Greek for “grace” is “charis,” meaning “graciousness of manner or actions, especially the divine influence upon the heart and its reflection in the life; benefit, favor.”(1) To paraphrase, God desires you to realize that He is expecting you to live enjoying a favorable relationship with Him in which you benefit from His gracious attitude and actions toward you.

5. In God’s perspective, you “firmly and safely stand” in this gracious, guilt-free relationship with Him. Let your mind grasp hold of the peace involved when you realize that your standing in a relationship with someone is firm and safe. The Greek for “stand” is “histemi,” a prolonged form of the root word, meaning to abide or continue.(1) Again, God’s perspective is that the relationship between you is a gracious one that will continue to be safe and firm; it is lasting. Allow yourself to enjoy the incredible peace and satisfaction from a firm, safe relationship with God.

6. The next sentence in the Romans 5 quote says, “Let us rejoice in our hope of experiencing and enjoying the glory of God.” It is good to remind you here that the term “hope” in scripture is not like the typical concept in English. In English, the term “hope” implies wishful thinking of something that may never happen. The Greek term used in this sentence, “elpis,” means to confidently anticipate or expect; it also contains the idea that you feel pleasure because of the confidence that what you are anticipating will actually happen.(1) God wants you to rejoice because you can live each and every day confidently anticipating, expecting to enjoy a lasting relationship with God in which you experience all the glories, all the wonders that exist in His person.

7. The last part of the quote, verse 5, says “Such hope never disappoints us…” What a phenomenally wonderful thought — a relationship in which you will not be disappointed. When you by faith accept God’s forgiveness or acquittal of your failures, you enter a relationship with Him of guilt-free confidence. That is where God desires you to exist. He desires you to grasp hold of that fact, enjoy it, live in confident anticipation that a harmonious relationship with God of favor, graciousness, and benefits is also a firm, safe, and lasting relationship in which you can daily experience all the glories existing in His personality. No wonder He tells us that we will not be disappointed!

In Part 2 of this post, we will wrap up by briefly looking at 2 benefits you receive daily from a guilt-free, confident relationship with God.

1. Greek definitions were taken from Strong’s Dictionary of New Testament Words.
2. Meriam-Webster Dictionary
3. thefreedictionary.com

When you look at your life, is your lifestyle one of true enjoyment, solely maintenance, or survivable chaos?

I recently mentioned about the need to “plan for life,” especially when life’s responsibilities appear to be squeezing your dreams out of the picture and life becomes solely a process of maintenance.  However, I have been reminded how easy it is for people to believe their lifestyles are intended to be chaotic to be fulfilling.

My spouse has done business in the past with a couple whose lives are in a constant state of chaos — by choice. The one person’s personality lends to feeling that this state of chaos is necessary for a fulfilling life. Both of them, being in a religious environment, either consciously or subconsciously believe that this state of “chaos” is a matter of religious sacrifice or higher calling. Working in religious fields, I’ve seen this concept too often in religious people, and unknowingly lived by that philosophy myself in my 20’s and 30’s. The effects of this barely tolerable lifestyle are already becoming visible in their kids and in poor business decisions, as time for restful meditation is lacking.

If your lifestyle is not one of true enjoyment, the mental perspective needs to be engrained that a healthy, restful way of life is intended by design and necessary for fulfillment.

Jesus expressed God’s design for your life in Matthew 11:28-30, Message translation.

Are you tired? Worn out? Burned out on religion? Come to Me. Get away with Me and you’ll recover your life. I’ll show you how to take a real rest. Walk with Me and work with Me – watch how I do it. Learn the unforced rhythms of grace. I won’t lay anything heavy or ill-fitting on you. Keep company with Me and you’ll learn to live freely and lightly.

Several points are interesting in this translation. First, the religious concept of living in a chaotic state of overwork as being somehow spiritual is a false religious concept that will burn you out. Second, living the way God intends for you, a healthy lifestyle with rest and freedom, will enable you to “recover your life,” true life.

Similar thoughts are expressed effectively in the Amplified translation.

Come to Me all you who are…overburdened and I will ease and relieve and refresh your souls…Learn of Me…and you will find rest, relief, ease, refreshment, recreation and blessed quiet…For My yoke is wholesome, useful, good — not harsh, hard, sharp, or pressing, but comfortable, gracious, and pleasant.

Notice God’s plan of lifestyle is not one that is overburdened. We must remove such religious misconceptions from our minds. His way of healthy lifestyles includes refreshment, recreation, and is not pressing, but wholesome, comfortable, and pleasant.

If your life is one of solely maintenance or what you believed to be “constructive chaos,” it is time to restructure and reorganize. Go back and re-read the Planning for Life post if you have not and make a healthy lifestyle plan. Or, if you made a life plan and you now realize that you created one that is chaotic, take some time this week to re-evaluate and restructure it with refreshment, recreation, wholesomeness, comfort so that you can “recover your life.”

In one of his newsletter articles, Dr. Joseph Mercola explained the results of these different studies. Use this link here or the footnote at the end of the post to read his full article.

The key factor resulting from the studies that Dr. Mercola brings out is that it is the lowering of insulin levels as a result of calorie restriction which helps to extend one’s life.

Calorie restriction equals lower insulin levels. On the reverse side, high insulin levels speed up the aging process. Though eating fewer calories overall does affect most people’s longevity, even more important is that the foods you are eliminating are ones that raise your insulin levels, such as sugar and grains. Dr. Mercola says that beverages with high fructose corn syrup are devastating to your insulin resistance; sodas with high fructose corn syrup are the number one source of calories in the US.

One research on people who lived to be over 100 focused on the type of food which lowered insulin levels as centenarians have lower blood glucose than those who die younger.

Fats: The diet surprisingly included unlimited amounts of these fats and oils:

•  Raw nuts and seeds
•  Avocados
•  Olives
•  Olive oil

Proteins: Centenarians participating in the research who did not exercise were limited to protein intake of 1 gram per kilo of body mass per day; those who exercised were allowed 1.25 grams/kg of body weight per day, approximately 50 to 80 grams of protein per day for most participants. Proteins allowed were:

•  Fish, sardines, and other seafood
•  Eggs
•  Tofu
•  Chicken and turkey
•  Wild game
•  More in link below

Carbs: Only non-starchy, fibrous vegetables were allowed:

•  Lettuce and other greens
•  Broccoli and cauliflower
•  Cucumbers
•  Mushrooms
•  Onions
•  Peppers
•  Sprouts
•  Asparagus
•  Seaweed

Sugars: Participants limited their beverages to six to eight 8oz glass of water and/or herbal tea daily. No sugary sodas or even fruit juices.

Dr. Mercola cautions that we’re all different in our nutritional needs. For discovering your nutritional type, he has a free optimized nutrition plan.  He also believes that some protein sources used in the study are unhealthy. However, Dr. Mercola believes the key result of the research to be that the elimination of starch carbs created major health benefits for all participants in the study.

Specific notable health results were 40% lower insulin levels and 50% reduced triglyceride/HDL ratio.

For more details on health benefits, food lists, and nutritional supplements used in the study, see Dr. Mercola’s full article here.

In my area of work, I come across many people in emotional pain created by a wide variety of circumstances.  Each of us, at some point during life, go through periods when we feel oppressed, almost crushed by the weight of the circumstances.  In Scripture, Paul talked about his feelings in such circumstances,

We are pressed on every side, yet not crushed; perplexed, yet not to despair; persecuted, but not abandoned; struck down, yet not destroyed. (2Cor.4:8)

Since we each face “crushing” circumstances at times, it would definitely be beneficial to be able to go through them as Paul did, not denying the gravity of the situation, but not allowing the situation to destroy him emotionally. Paul’s faith, or hope, kept him from losing heart in trying times.  Faith is defined in Scripture as not only believing God exists, but that He responds positively to those who seek Him. (Heb.11:6)

It is knowledge of the nature of God that gives one hope during times of brokenness or oppression.

It is the difference between knowing without a doubt that someone cares about you and what is taking place, especially Someone with greater abilities and resources, as opposed to feeling there is no one to care at all.  Jesus purpose while on earth, other than the plan of salvation, was to illustrate in living form the nature of God to us.  Listen to this quote of how He did that:

Jesus…with the Holy Spirit and with strength and ability and power…went about doing good curing all who were harassed and oppressed. (Acts10:38 Amp)

Jesus both illustrated the nature of God to bring us out of oppressing circumstances and broken hearts, but proclaimed it to be a part of God’s nature.

This is a quote of Jesus speaking to those who are broken hearted, oppressed, and crushed by calamity:

Father God has anointed Me to send forth as delivered those who are oppressed, who are downtrodden, bruised, crushed, and broken down by calamity, to proclaim the year of the Lord, the day when salvation and the free favors of God profusely abound. (Lk.4:18,19)

Notice a couple of points from this quote:

 -It is God’s desire to help you and bring you out of that hurtful situation, ie. “send forth as delivered”

-God wants you to not try to handle the hurt yourself, but look to Him for help, as is meant by the references to God’s intervention, “year of the Lord,” and the “day of salvation.”

-The type of help God wants to give you is not minimal, but “profusely abounding,” or more than you would expect to receive.

Looking at this quote a little more closely brings an even greater realization of how personally involved God wants to be in your circumstance.

I decided, for my own benefit, to look up the definitions of certain words in the Greek, since this passage was originally written in Greek.  The term “year of the Lord” actually means “a whole new age (1).”  Through Jesus, God proclaimed a whole new age of His involvement in your life.  What is this involvement like?

First, it is continuous.  The Greek word for day in this passage means, “perpetually present,” or continuously present. In this whole new age, God’s help is continuously present to deliver you, and bring you profuse salvation and free favors.

Second, the word for salvation includes deliverance, provision, rescue, aid (1).  God’s perpetually present help brings you whatever you need in your oppression and broken heartedness.

Third, though many people who seek after God still struggle with the question of whether or not God will help them or whether they can possible earn His help, the phrase “free favors” is defined as unmerited gifts (1)!  No, you do not need to struggle under condemnation feeling that you must try to earn God’s help and still fall short; God has proclaimed to you that the help in your crushing circumstance is an unearned gift!

Let’s look at a paraphrase of this quote, including the Greek definitions:

Father God has anointed Me to send forth as delivered those who are oppressed, who are downtrodden, bruised, crushed, and broken down by calamity, to proclaim to you the whole new age of the Lord, the perpetually present time when salvation – deliverance, provision, rescue, aid — and unmerited gifts from God profusely abound.

You can be free from emotional harm though dealing with life’s oppressive circumstances. 

Hope is there for you, as it was for Paul, to be hard pressed, yet not crushed, not in despair.  The realization that God, through Jesus, announced a whole new age of God’s continual offer of profuse unearned gifts, deliverance, provision, rescue, and aid for you!  Believe His offer!  Ask Him for what you need in your circumstance!  Look for the answers with expectancy!

1. Strong’s Dictionary of Greek New Testament Words

I’ve recently come across another blog author whose posts I thoroughly enjoy, Jeff McClung.  He is a quality writer.  Jeff wrote a challenging post about hearing the “What if…” challenge at a conference session and how it changed the life of his family.  I wanted to share with you some excerpts from Jeff’s post as well as a youtube clip of the conference session by Donald Miller which inspired him. (See footnotes at end of post for links.)

Inspiration for the “What if” Challenge

Jeff was inspired by a conference session with Donald Miller in which he said that screen writers or novelists use this method when they get stuck in their writing.  They begin asking random questions of “What if…” this happened to this or that character. Miller says the same process works to make progress in life and asks people to take the following “What if…” challenge. 

Have the family brainstorm about 25 “What if” questions and write them on a whiteboard or notebook.  There are no right or wrong answers, but some of the questions will still be in the forefront of your mind days later.  These “What if…” questions are the life changers.

Miller did this challenge with the readers on his blog and people began dreaming, began expressing new goals, their desires to overcome hurts or destructive habits.  Miller says,

Some of the questions you will realize you have to live.   You will not be able to not do it, bcause you will realize there is a beautiful story waiting for you that you didn’t know you could live.  And if you choose not to live a beautiful story, it is the same as choosing to die. (1)

 Here are some sample questions from Jeff McClung’s blog to get you started.

What if I do whatever it takes to kick that bad habit so that it’s a distant memory by 2012?

What if I wrote down one thing that I was thankful for every day this year and kept that list as a reminder for the dark days of 2011?

What if I did something to make at least one person smile every day this year?

What if I planned a surprise party for someone?

What if I were more intentional about creating memories with my wife and kids?

What if we become relentless about getting out of debt?

What if we galvanized our family, friends, and/or church to do something more about the homeless living in our city? (2)

I urge you to take the “What if…” challenge and use this innovative idea of to see which questions stay in your mind, change your life, and  help you achieve “living a beautiful story” with your life. 

1. Donald Miller’s youtube video clip from his conference session.
2. Sample “What if…” questions are excerpts from Jeff McClung’s blog post, “How to Make the Most of the New Year.” 

I recently heard about a new, non-drowsy flu symptom medicine, called Oscillococcinum, which clinical studies show relieve both the severity and duration of flu symptoms such as chills, body aches, fever, headache, weakness. The amazing part of the information on this drug is that is said to be:

-all natural

-over-the-counter

-no side effects AND

–no danger of drug interaction, such as with high blood pressure medication.

Oscillococcinum comes in quick-dissolving oral pellets that should be taken at the first sign of flu, 1 for adults and children 2 years and up, every 6 hours, up to 3 times a day. The VitaminShoppe.com carries it in local stores and online, which is where I read about it. A six dose package runs about $8.50. The article says it has been used by “millions of people and is recommended by doctors around the world.”

This sounds like a great new option especially for those unable to take regular flu medication due to their high blood pressure meds or other prescriptions.

ReceiveHealing.com was developed and exists solely for the purpose of bringing physical, emotional, and spiritual healing to people’s lives. We trust you have benefited in a variety of ways this past year.

May your life be filled with the abundance and peace God desires for you, containing all that is beautiful, best, bountiful, cheerful, good, joyful, loving, prosperous, and wealthy [Hebrew and Greek definitions of abundance], as well as existing in a state of safety, happiness, good health, friendship, rest, and wholeness so that all is well in your life [Hebrew and Greek definitions of peace].

May you be comforted from all past and present sorrows. May you receive compassion as freely as you have shown it. May all your fears be replaced with faith and peace. May you forgive those who have harmed you in the past so that you are released to reach your future goals and desires. May the greater understanding of God’s love for you which you have gained this year be used as an unshakeable basis for your self worth and foundation for your life. May all your relationships be healthy, rewarding, and free from resentment. May the voice of God be clear in your spirit so that your words and decisions flow from His wisdom, bringing healing and wholeness to every aspect of your life.

Have a very blessed and happy New Year!

Table of contents for Minimize Holiday Stress

1. Minimize Holiday Stress with Relatives Part 1
2. Minimize Holiday Stress with Relatives Part 2
3. Minimize Holiday Stress with Relatives Part 3

Take advantage of these GREAT tips to reduce common stresses in holiday family gatherings!

(From the archives to help you have a stress-free, enjoyable holiday season!)

[This is Part 3 of a 3 part post.  If you missed Part 1 on tips to deal with “3 types of difficult people,” or Part 2 on “tips to cope with difficult relatives,” you may use the above series link to read them.  The tips in this series are excerpts from 3 different authors. Please use the reference links to read their full articles.]

Dealing with Difficult Relatives for the Holidays by Kate Zabriskie, Business Training Works, Inc., offers these tips to reduce conflicts with your relatives. These are only excerpts. Use the link in the footnotes to read her full article.

1. Whatever the reason is that you are with your holiday crew, you are not obligated to call up feelings you don’t have.

2. Be civil no matter what. The last thing you want is for your negative reaction to overshadow the initial offense.

3. Figure out a couple of ways that you might rein in your reaction ahead of time. [Remember past irritations or confrontations by your relatives and come up with a plan of action or response to keep yourself calm, change the subject, and divert the attention.]

4. Consider journaling [rather than venting your feelings to your friends.]

5. Downtime is the smell of opportunity to difficult relatives. Your holidays will run more smoothly if there are plenty of activities to fill gaps. [games, walks, etc.]

6. Plan an entry and exit time, as well as a date for yourself, if you are going to someone else’s house. Do the same if a group is coming to yours. For example, “Bob and I would like you to come for Thanksgiving. If you could arrive between 11:00 and noon on Thursday that would give us time to get everything ready for you. We’ve also planned a big breakfast for Friday before everyone leaves.

7. Think about inviting more people to your holiday. When there are fifty people in attendance, it is much more difficult for a diva to be a diva.

8. Focus on the kids. Babies and little kids don’t fully understand weird family dynamics. Most of the time, discussions about babies are usually fairly benign.

9. Focus on the less fortunate. If, for example, at Thanksgiving everyone brings a gift for Toys for Tots or some other charity group, part of your discussion will naturally revolve around that.

Use the link to read the full article by this author:

Dealing with Difficult Relatives for the Holidays, Kate Zabriskie, Business Training Works, Inc.

Table of contents for Minimize Holiday Stress

1. Minimize Holiday Stress with Relatives Part 1
2. Minimize Holiday Stress with Relatives Part 2
3. Minimize Holiday Stress with Relatives Part 3

Take advantage of these GREAT tips to reduce common stresses in holiday family gatherings!

(From the archives to help you have a stress-free, enjoyable holiday season!)

[This is Part 2 of a 3 part post.  If you missed Part 1 on tips to deal with “3 types of difficult people,” you may use the above series link to read it.  The tips in this series are excerpts from 3 different authors. Please use the reference links to read their full articles.]

These tips to minimize your stress while spending holidays with the relatives are excerpts from E.K. Tirado’s article, Three Ways to Cope with Difficult Relatives During the Holidays. Use the link in the footnotes to read the full article.

1) Change what you can, and do not fret about what you can’t change. Too many times the cause of our stress derives from our need to change people. Accept the fact that you cannot control other peoples’ actions, but you can control how you react to them. Don’t come to any event with unrealistic expectations.

2) Stay close to the “normal” family member. There is often one family member who you can actually hold an intelligent conversation with…someone you feel pretty good being around. My advice: Hang around with this family member…..often. Finds ways to spend time with that person whether it’s taking a post-meal walk around the neighborhood, or playing a game (or two or three) of checkers. If you have absolutely NO “normal” family members, then invite a “normal” person to attend an occasion with you.

3) Give yourself an important job. “Remove” yourself from the situation by giving yourself an important job. For example,decide that this year you will be the official family photographer. If you’re not much of a photographer, then give yourself another important job like tending to the turkey, making fancy swans with the table napkins, running to the store for last minute food items, Do whatever it is you have to do to keep busy, while still continuing to interact with family.

Lastly, you simply have to accept the fact that you don’t have the ability to change people, they must change themselves. The one person you can change is yourself. You can change how you react to things, how you view things and how you ultimately deal with things.

In Part 3, we’ll post more tips for dealing with difficult relatives!

Use this link to read the full article:

Three Ways to Cope with Difficult Relatives During the Holidays, E.K. Tirado