The Receptionist

Get Mad

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Tue, 03 Aug 2021 13:20:00 +0000

A friend of mine posted this on Instagram recently and I thought, "Oh no, please don't."

I get the appeal. Saying, "it is what it is" and then letting it go and moving on is the ultimate in non-attachment right? You'd be a zen little duckling, just letting everything run off your back and living your life.

I guess the problem is that some of the things that make me the most angry are social justice issues and inequalities, and people accepting those for what they are and moving on is exactly what's made all these problems in the first place.

So no, I'm going to keep getting mad.

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Vaccine Hospitalization

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Wed, 28 Jul 2021 15:55:00 +0000

If you're looking at rates of hospitalization among vaccinated people and getting scared, here's something that might help!

I used to teach Bayes theorem and its results still surprise me!

Here’s the type of diagram that usually helps it all make sense for me: pic.twitter.com/A6toIcr5xe
— Kenny (@kennyshirley) July 19, 2021

The short answer: a tiny percentage of vaccinated people still wind up in hospital, but it ends up being a larger proportion of hospitalized people due to the fact that so many people are vaccinated, so there's a way larger pool of people to draw on!

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The Billionaire Space Race

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Tue, 20 Jul 2021 13:26:00 +0000

Thinking about this today.

A rat done bit my sister Nell.
(with Whitey on the moon)
Her face and arms began to swell.
(and Whitey's on the moon)

I can't pay no doctor bill.
(but Whitey's on the moon)
Ten years from now I'll be payin' still.
(while Whitey's on the moon)

The man jus' upped my rent las' night.
('cause Whitey's on the moon)
No hot water, no toilets, no lights.
(but Whitey's on the moon)

I wonder why he's uppi' me?
('cause Whitey's on the moon?)
I was already payin' 'im fifty a week.
(with Whitey on the moon)
Taxes takin' my whole damn check,
Junkies makin' me a nervous wreck,
The price of food is goin' up,
An' as if all that shit wasn't enough

A rat done bit my sister Nell.
(with Whitey on the moon)
Her face an' arm began to swell.
(but Whitey's on the moon)

Was all that money I made las' year
(for Whitey on the moon?)
How come there ain't no money here?
(Hm! Whitey's on the moon)
Y'know I jus' 'bout had my fill
(of Whitey on the moon)
I think I'll sen' these doctor bills,
Airmail special
(to Whitey on the moon)

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Can't Be Trusted

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Mon, 19 Jul 2021 13:52:00 +0000

You know when people say, "I can't be trusted around X," where X is probably some kind of delicious food but may be another vice?

And then, because we can't be trusted with it, we develop a complex set of rules in our lives to control our access to it? We hide it, freeze it in a block of ice, never keep it in the house, make ourselves to exercise before we consume it, go on cleanses or fasts or abstain for a month at a time, tell ourselves what days or what times we are allowed to have it?

On one hand, great. If that feels good for you, great.

On the other hand, I have a "what if?"

What if... we learned to trust ourselves?

Not that we learn to trust that our will is iron-clad and we will never overdo it when it comes to X because we now inherently follow these rules, but to actually be in tune with our bodies, with our wants and needs, with compassion, and so trust ourselves to do whatever is actually right for us.

It's harder at the outset. It's more complicated. But living life where you can trust yourself seems a lot more enjoyable than a life with a bunch of arbitrary rules to keep ourselves in line.

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To Every Thing There is a Season

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Tue, 06 Jul 2021 13:36:00 +0000

About a year ago I announced some ch-ch-ch-changes. At the time all I knew was that I was unshackling myself from the strict guidelines I had given myself for writing daily on this blog and some of the structure and format I'd put into place here and I didn't know what that would look like.

Well, what it did look like was that I still wrote posts every day and probably poured more out into this blog than I had before.

Now, all of a sudden, I feel kinda done?

Not done in a forever way, but definitely in a "my life actually doesn't revolve around this blog" way.

If you like having my musings in your life and want to find out when I've written something, you can sign up from my newsletter or follow me on ye old socials (receptionist insta, personal insta, twitter, tiktok, or facebook but I never post there).

So... see you around? Or when I suddenly feel like my life is empty and I come crawling back here?

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The Coldest Summer of the Rest of Our Lives

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Mon, 05 Jul 2021 13:28:00 +0000

A couple weeks ago, I was telling some friends how we have to enjoy this time in our lives: COVID is (theoretically) getting under control and climate change is only just ramping up. Pending other disasters (still totally likely!), we'll have some decently-enjoyable years in here before things get really bad again.

Honestly, my friends seemed a little perturbed by this. They called me cynical.

Buuuuuut after a heatwave in BC that resulted in over 700 sudden deaths (where the only way to make life bearable for most is buy an AC and contribute to making global temperatures worse, and will result in even more forest fires than usual, one of which already fully destroyed a town in a day) PLUS the ocean literally being on fire and whatever ecological effects come of that, I'm thinking I was wrong.

I think I was too optimistic about how "sweet" this "sweet spot" between COVID and Climate Change: Full Throttle will be.

I guess time will tell: as the planet becomes less and less habitable in the coming years, what will we look back on as the lull? Or will we be too busy hating our past selves for not fighting this harder? (Or, most appropriately, hating the ultra-wealthy oil barons who fully knew about climate change in the 70s and hid it?)

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Everyday Chores

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Wed, 30 Jun 2021 13:30:00 +0000

It's hot and it's taken all my energy to just do my dang job these past few days.

Here's some cool art by Tatsuya Tanaka.

I prefer my chips un-ironed, if given a choice, but whatever you've got is fine.

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Giving Beauty the Middle Finger

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Mon, 28 Jun 2021 13:18:00 +0000

Photographer Waleed Shah is obviously the coolest and has a book of photographs called Rock Your Ugly: A Middle Finger to Toxic Beauty Standards. He had people pose featuring their biggest insecurities about themselves and the result is powerful and gorgeous and you could probably write a dissertation about it.

via Creative Boom.

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This Week's Gratitude & Delight

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Sat, 26 Jun 2021 13:20:00 +0000

Ivo Adventures

The last week I have been grateful for:

Hanging out on the beach with a friend for her birthday and still got home in time for my usual bedtime even though it was a beach allllllll the way on the other side of town.

The person who hit my balcony with their moving truck because they were super proactive to deal with it right away and so I didn't have to fight anyone to take responsibility.

My neighbourhood bike shop for quickly repairing my bike's snapped cable even though they were so busy.

The somewhat last-minute opportunity to go backpacking with a friend in the MIDDLE OF THE WEEK and sitting by a river, drinking rose, and even being able to make a little campfire.

Gertie coming in for cuddles every time I lie down.

Seeing my dad for Father's Day! He had a surgery recently and it was good to see that he's recovering.

THIS WEEK'S DELIGHT: Tried a new thing and the results were DREAMY!

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Forget and Forgive

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Fri, 25 Jun 2021 13:04:00 +0000

Forgiving is hard, right? Some people seem to be able to very easily get past being hurt but it's a big ol' thing for me to turn off the part of my brain that relives the pain over and over again.

Well heeeeeerrrrrrrrre comes SCIENCE with some answers!!!

Apparently there are two kinds of forgiveness: decisional and emotional. Like the names say, in the former you decide to forgive someone and in the latter you try to release the negative emotions related to the perpetrator of your pain and even usher in positive ones.

Here's the cool part: people who opt for emotional forgiveness tend to forget the details of how they were harmed. They'll still remember the gist of it, but those details that might otherwise recycle themselves over and over in your brain get fuzzy around the edges.

And guess what makes it easier to forgive someone??? Yeah, FORGETTING all those dang details.

So really, the saying should be, "forget and forgive."

(If you're wondering how the heck to even do emotional forgiveness, in the study the participants were instructed “wish that the offender experiences something positive or healing and to focus their thoughts and feelings on empathy," so apparently that's it.)

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Tweet Like It's Free

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Thu, 24 Jun 2021 13:00:00 +0000

Last week, Palestinians were using the hashtag "tweet like it's free" (#غرد_كأنها_حرة), tweeting about what they would be doing if they weren't living under Israeli oppression.

Their tweets imagined a world where they could freely go for a run and then get fresh lemonade in the square, drive directly between Beirut and Haifa along the coast, and see a shooting star without ducking for cover.

It reminded me of when they ask women what they would do if men disappeared from the world for one day, and mainly it's things like wearing whatever they wanted and going for a walk at night.

Obvious statement of the day: it's just not right.

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In Your Own Image

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Wed, 23 Jun 2021 13:07:00 +0000

"You can safely assume you've created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do."
-Anne Lammott

I weirdly feel like this applies to the people who don't even believe in God, although it's probably a little less relevant to their day-to-day lives.

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Visions of Motherhood

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Tue, 22 Jun 2021 13:07:00 +0000

Honestly, in my little corner of the internet, it's nothing but nuance about the experience of motherhood. And yet, apparently, a lot of people still hold a monolithic view of what this means to be a human who had a baby. Photography collective The Luupe's series of 100 visions of motherhood is on.

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Life is Actually Simple

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Mon, 21 Jun 2021 13:09:00 +0000

"Life can just be lived.
You don't have to:
prove anyone wrong....
make anyone proud....
change the world....
leave a lasting legacy....
You can simply show up, find the joy, be good to you and be good to others, learn from the pain, hold yourself accountable, relish the wonder of it and ride this thing out."
-Rachel Elizabeth Cargle

First of all, does her list of things to "simply" do actually sound like a lot? She's like those foodies who lie and say, this is a really simple recipe, and then proceed to use 22 ingredients over the course of two and a half hours.

So I would argue that her overall point is right but you don't even have to do all those things, or at least not all the time.

Yes, life is better for us and everyone else when we are learning and growing, holding ourselves accountable to our mistakes and experiencing wonder. But these are not requirements either. You can spend an inordinate amount of time staring at screens and ultimately, that's fine too.

The point is that your life is your own. Do with it is you will.

(Also, a hilarious and tragic confession: when I was transcribing this quote, my brain read "find the joy" as "find a job" and I was just like, yup, that's on the list of things to do in life and didn't question it and I replaced JOY with a JOB that is capitalism right there, folks.)

Gabriele Stravinskaite

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This Week's Gratitude & Delight

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Sat, 19 Jun 2021 13:46:00 +0000

Ivo Adventures

The last week I have been grateful for:

My dad's surgeon for (it seems) doing a good job and that his surgery went really well and he is already feeling better!

Seeing my mom for breakfast and all the restaurants with easy outside patios that we can sit on.

My bank for cancelling a payment I made by accident to the WRONG CARD and would have been a whole big thing.

Having lunch with a really dear friend who I don't see very often and who truly embraces the notion of not needing to put in effort when we see each other.

The weather for becoming suddenly summer (please someone write a "Suddenly Seymour" parody about summer magically appearing) when it was supposed to still be a little rainy and now it's noooooot!!!

Being able to celebrate a good friend's birthday, even if it was at 9am on a Sunday (more due to the existence of children than COVID).

THIS WEEK'S DELIGHT: Waking up on mornings where I have actually gone to bed early enough to get enough sleep and wowwwwwwwwww it's so much better.

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Follow These Plates

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Fri, 18 Jun 2021 13:18:00 +0000

Marie-Claude Marquis' decorative plates are generally wonderful and this one, in specific, is glorious.

And honestly, I can see the youth group I went to back in the day getting really into this sentiment.

Expressing the opposite sentiment to my youth group is this next plate, another fave:

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Memes and Death Wishes

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Thu, 17 Jun 2021 13:06:00 +0000

This made me laugh.

for you

It looks like the article is about millennials, but I've gotta say, it should be about gen z. Millennials may have "invented" memes or whatever, but gen z really bonded over them in a new and special way. Same with the whole wanting to die thing--they took our general comfort with dark humour and turned it up to 11, flirting on Tinder with murder-suicide pacts.

Listen, I'm not here for the culture war between millennials and gen z. Those kids are smart and intimidating as heck and credit where credit is due when it comes to the memes and the death wishes.

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What's Really Going to Happen to the Candles???

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Wed, 16 Jun 2021 13:06:00 +0000

Honestly, this is a very good question:

Are vaccinated people blowing out candles on cake that everyone is going to eat or are we just never going back to that?
— Jenée (@jdesmondharris) May 24, 2021

Are you? Is this ever coming back? According to my friend in LA, handshaking is already back despite everyone's big talk about never shaking hands again so I'm already feeling a little betrayed by all our big talk of letting these traditions go.

You know what, I'll take the handshakes if my friends and I are able to taste each others' cocktails again. Not sure about the candles though. My friends and I did a birthday this past weekend where we each held a candle and sang happy birthday and then blew it out ourselves. It was kind of like a fun version of a candlelight vigil.

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Here Are Some of My Collages

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Tue, 15 Jun 2021 13:07:00 +0000

I've been making collages! Here are some of my faves:

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That's Some Kind of Poem

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Mon, 14 Jun 2021 13:08:00 +0000

Photo by corno.fulgur75 on Foter.com

I'd never heard of poet John Girono, but now I'm sad I never got to hear him read one of his poems. (I guess I probably could look something up on YouTube). The man's work reads like a deadpan, angry rant and I've never encountered poetry like that.

I don’t
know
what
you’ve been
doing
today
I don’t know what
you’ve been doing today,
but today
was one
of the worst
days
of my life
but today was one
of the worst days of my life
but today was one of the worst days of my life,
and you’re walking
down 2nd Avenue
coming to
St. Mark’s Place
-Excerpt from Eating the Sky by John Giorno

Like... COME ON!!!!

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This Week's Gratitude & Delight

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Sat, 12 Jun 2021 13:57:00 +0000

Ivo Adventures

The last week I have been grateful for:

My coworker putting my biking clothes in the dryer (with hers) because we both got caught in the rain on the way into work and air drying wasn't going to cut it.

Happy hour in the park with a friend who I deeply enjoy but don't see very often, and also the fact that she remembered we had set the date with the intention specifically of discussing some mental health practices and not just to hang out, so I got both!

The car co-op I am a member of because I needed to buy more flour (in the giant bag) and it is so much easier than transporting it on my bike.

A meeting of the new book club I've joined that is freaking awesome and full of some very smart and cool ladies.

The fact that camping is allowed right now, so I got to spend some quality time with my friends and their kiddos. (Also, do you realize we are entering a world where we won't have to think about what we are "allowed" to do socially and just... have to make decisions???? Weird.)

THIS WEEK'S DELIGHT: I awkwardly put out there that I miss my old nickname and maybe people could call me that again and I instantly got a reply from a woman I work with being like, "Done!" and it felt so good!

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Warm Your Dang Heart

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Fri, 11 Jun 2021 13:29:00 +0000

Someone sent me this meme and it warmed my cold, dark heart like the sun.

Apparently these sweet lil' red raccoons are residents of Oregon Zoo.

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Sometimes, You Can Do Things Just Because You Like Them

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Thu, 10 Jun 2021 13:05:00 +0000

A friendly reminder:

Just because you are good at something doesn't mean you have to do it.

Just because you enjoy doing something doesn't mean you have to get good at it.

In neither case do you have any obligation to try to make money off of it.

Sometimes, you get to just do the things you like to do because you like them.

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Weakness of the Flesh

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Wed, 09 Jun 2021 13:04:00 +0000

I was hypnotized by this short dance film featuring Emma Rosenzweig-Bock dancing in a sea of... herself. Weakness of the Flesh.

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Fear Will Find a Way

noreply@blogger.com (Andrea) — Tue, 08 Jun 2021 13:31:00 +0000

Sometimes it feels like fear is its own entity all together. A persistent climbing ivy that, once planted, takes over your entire house. You can prune back one tendril only to find another has pushed up through the floorboards.

A friend of mine is afraid of the vaccine.

As far as I know, this isn't typical of her. She's definitely on the hippie-dippie spiritual side of things (one of the reasons we have connected over the years) but I wouldn't peg her as anti-vax, anti-science, or anti-medicine.

But then fear happened.

I don't know who first planted it, but someone gave her a reason to be afraid. Now each time a fear is addressed, getting pruned back with thoughtful, evidence-based reason leaving her assured that the vaccine is safe, another justification for the fear slips in and it grows right back.

I'm told it is next to impossible to get ivy out at the root and it's at least as hard with fear. Unless you can reject the central premise all together, all it takes is one little "what if" and bam! You're surrounded by scary vines. And that central premise? Chances are it's connected to something deeply important to you (that's how it gets in there in the first place), so good luck there.

This isn't a very hopeful post, is it? Okay, here's the hope: it is possible to overcome your fear. I have done it a couple of times. Once, it took the near-dissolution of my faith. Another time it took me realizing that I could prioritize a different value over the one that was driving the fear. In both cases, it was a big shift in how I saw myself and/or the world, but it happened.

There is another way, of course. As my heart-niece reminded me this weekend: sometimes you have to act from your brave self instead of your scared self and just do the thing that scares you.

Or I guess you could just become the Poison Ivy of fear and make it do your bidding (if you figure out how to do that LET ME KNOW).

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