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	<title>Restraint</title>
	
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	<description>non sum qualis eram</description>
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		<title>[01/30] Content Creation Meme, first in a series</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/C2godp55X84/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/writing/2618/0130-content-creation-meme-first-in-a-series/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 07 Sep 2010 07:03:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Writing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[30 days]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[memes]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nth in a series]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2618</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Day 01 &#8211; Introduction:
I&#8217;m Jairus. I&#8217;m 31 years old, male, and I live in the city I was born in; Ottawa, Canada.

I work as the Web Communications Coordinator for a Crown Corporation, a stone&#8217;s throw from Parliament Hill. I&#8217;m trying to cut down on the amount of groups/classes/etc that I identify as, but my Twitter [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Day 01 &#8211; Introduction:</strong></p>
<p>I&#8217;m Jairus. I&#8217;m 31 years old, male, and I live in the city I was born in; Ottawa, Canada.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://media.restraint.org/2010/09/RWS_9324.jpg"><img class="size-medium wp-image-2620 aligncenter" title="Photo by Robin Sarac" src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/09/RWS_9324-300x300.jpg" alt="" width="300" height="300" /></a></p>
<p>I work as the Web Communications Coordinator for a Crown Corporation, a stone&#8217;s throw from Parliament Hill. I&#8217;m trying to cut down on the amount of groups/classes/etc that I identify as, but my Twitter bio claims that I am a DJ, hacker, electronic musician, designer, and copyright nerd. Things I am <em>not</em> include: white, straight, vanilla, liberal/conservative, religious, or good with money.</p>
<p>I don&#8217;t remember much of my childhood, which is probably for the best. I have a lot of siblings, but grew up with my mother, and my brother Josh. (My <em>younger </em>brother named Josh, that is. I also have an older brother named Josh. It&#8217;s complicated.) As a teenager I was very good at hacking, stealing, telling stories, being homeless, making friends, lying, and Quake. I moved to Toronto with my then-girlfriend (Jessica) and then-roommate (Venk) shortly after I got a job and a home, and spent a few years there alternately making crazy dot-com money and surviving on a bag of unwashed rice and other people&#8217;s leftovers.</p>
<p>After coming back to Ottawa and spending most of my 20s living and loving with the multi-talented DJ Leslie and a rotating cast of friends, foes, and family, I struck out on my own last year, and now live alone in Chinatown with two feral kittens, three video game systems, and four single-purpose kitchen appliances. I&#8217;m madly in love with the beautiful <a href="http://audrawilliams.livejournal.com/">Audra Williams</a>, and try to avoid having Facebook describe any of my other relationships as &#8216;complicated&#8217;.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve just returned from a 5-week tour of the United States and Canada (playing the final show tomorrow at Zaphods, where I&#8217;ve DJed with Leslie for nearly a decade), and am really looking forward to figuring out what it is I want to do next.</p>
<p><span id="more-2618"></span></p>
<blockquote><p><strong>Day 01 &#8211; Introduction</strong><br />
Day 02 – Your first love, in great detail<br />
Day 03 – Your parents, in great detail<br />
Day 04 – What you ate today, in great detail<br />
Day 05 – Your definition of love, in great detail<br />
Day 06 – Your day, in great detail<br />
Day 07 – Your best friend, in great detail<br />
Day 08 – A moment, in great detail<br />
Day 09 – Your beliefs, in great detail<br />
Day 10 – What you wore today, in great detail<br />
Day 11 – Your siblings, in great detail<br />
Day 12 – What’s in your bag, in great detail<br />
Day 13 – This week, in great detail<br />
Day 14 – What you wore today, in great detail<br />
Day 15 – Your dreams, in great detail<br />
Day 16 – Your first kiss, in great detail<br />
Day 17 – Your favourite memory, in great detail<br />
Day 18 – Your favourite birthday, in great detail<br />
Day 19 – Something you regret, in great detail<br />
Day 20 – This month, in great detail<br />
Day 21 – Another moment, in great detail<br />
Day 22 – Something that upsets you, in great detail<br />
Day 23 – Something that makes you feel better, in great detail<br />
Day 24 – Something that makes you cry, in great detail<br />
Day 25 – A first, in great detail<br />
Day 26 – Your fears, in great detail<br />
Day 27 – Your favourite place, in great detail<br />
Day 28 – Something that you miss, in great detail<br />
Day 29 – Your aspirations, in great detail<br />
Day 30 – One last moment, in great detail</p></blockquote>
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		<item>
		<title>Wind and Cities (or: this is not a tour diary)</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/IAZCb9kSpuI/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/writing/2616/wind-and-cities-or-this-is-not-a-tour-diary/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 29 Aug 2010 03:28:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Ottawa]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Writing]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2616</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[In Chicago. Spent the day wandering the city (including a fantastic two hours as part of an architecture walking tour), and have been left with tired feet and a heavy heart.
Being in the United States is rough at the best of times, and seeing just how many mentally ill, homeless, hungry people there are in [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>In Chicago. Spent the day wandering the city (including a fantastic two hours as part of an architecture walking tour), and have been left with tired feet and a heavy heart.</p>
<p>Being in the United States is rough at the best of times, and seeing just how many mentally ill, homeless, hungry people there are in this city gets to me. It&#8217;s so fucking brutal.</p>
<p>The tour&#8217;s coming to an end, which is of course bittersweet. I&#8217;m looking forward to seeing the people (and kittens) in Ottawa that I love and miss, but there&#8217;s a lot about the city that leaves me raw when I think about it. Homesickness, without any city that makes me feel like I&#8217;m home.</p>
<p>Going to go out to Neo tonight. We&#8217;ll see if my sorrows float.</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/IAZCb9kSpuI" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>Tragedy (For Us): California Dreamin</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/FhIDSdMsiFs/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/avs/2614/tragedy-for-us-california-dreamin/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 25 Aug 2010 17:16:20 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Ad·ver·sary]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[industrial]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nth in a series]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2614</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Das Bunker, Los Angeles. Some kind of crazy rivethead mecca, the likes of which I thought were all but extinct.

We rolled into LA in the early afternoon, and spent a few hours decompressing at Rev John’s, where we were joined both by his lovable italian greyhounds, and by the darling Audra Williams, who flew out [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Das Bunker, Los Angeles. Some kind of crazy rivethead mecca, the likes of which I thought were all but extinct.</p>
<p><a title="DSC00232" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4926104734/"><img border="0" alt="DSC00232" src="http://static.flickr.com/4141/4926104734_e76e935991.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>We rolled into LA in the early afternoon, and spent a few hours decompressing at Rev John’s, where we were joined both by his lovable italian greyhounds, and by the darling Audra Williams, who flew out to join us on the road for a week.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5204" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4925542081/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5204" src="http://static.flickr.com/4073/4925542081_071cdc1ab3.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>John’s hospitality was above and beyond. We all walked away happy, fed, and with a lot of Das Bunker merch. Plus, the show was killer. The place was packed, people were cheering, and it took a full five minutes to make it from the stage to the merch booth after my set was over. Yann, of course, fucked shit up old-school.</p>
<p>A quick jaunt to San Francisco later, we were at the Retox Lounge. </p>
<p><a title="IMG_4823" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4926105528/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4823" src="http://static.flickr.com/4115/4926105528_261b409b80.jpg" /></a></p>
<p><a title="IMG_4873" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4925513273/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4873" src="http://static.flickr.com/4102/4925513273_a6d893faf9.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>We were worried about this show, as SF crowds are fickle and cruel creatures; but it was a smash success. Nearly everyone there told us “I don’t normally come out to this venue, <em>but</em>…”, and the dancefloor was moving all night.</p>
<p><iframe class="youtube-player" type="text/html" width="640" height="385" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/QIJv-VQmzCw?hl=en_US" frameborder="0"></iframe>
<p>We spent a few days off in SF (graciously hosted by Coolio and Sharon) where Scott and Yann got to relax, and Audra and I got to explore the city.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4912" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4925516257/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4912" src="http://static.flickr.com/4137/4925516257_e849431239.jpg" /></a></p>
<p><a title="IMG_5064" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4926122498/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5064" src="http://static.flickr.com/4095/4926122498_e492c33bc2.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>SF is one of those places that reminds me just how small Ottawa really is. Places like 826 Valencia could never survive at home, and institutions like City Lights would never have been able to do what they did. There aren’t enough people, there isn’t any support from the city itself, and it’s nearly impossible to build sustained support for any kind of artistic enterprise.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5184" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4925541287/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5184" src="http://static.flickr.com/4118/4925541287_9de9ee2a39.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>But I digress.</p>
<p>We left California for Portland, which – if i may sound like an asshole – I had no idea was so cool. Austin is the only other city in the states where I’ve seen so many amazing, indie businesses and arts/crafts. </p>
<p>We played at The Fez Ballroom, which is a beautiful concert hall. After a dozen converted gallery spaces and cramped clubs, it was a breath of fresh air. Scott’s opening set had people cheering from the middle of the first song on, and while it was a great show for all three of us, he kicked the shit out of Yann and I both in crowd reaction and merch sales, which is pretty awesome.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5249" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4925545033/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5249" src="http://static.flickr.com/4136/4925545033_7fbbbb8a1e.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>(We also got to check out Derek’s store before we left. Verdict: Fantastic, not enough Ad·ver·sary.)</p>
<p>Seattle was next, where we were hosted by the lovely Jeri, who was gracious and generous, and made sure everything we needed was taken care of.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5292" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4926144088/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5292" src="http://static.flickr.com/4140/4926144088_9a6bbdfb12.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>The show itself was quiet, but a good time. We had the next day off, and Audra and I took a ferry over to Vachon where we spent a night at her friend Heather’s idyllic country home. Hot tubs make for great stress relievers after two weeks in a car, incidentally.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5283" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4925547889/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5283" src="http://static.flickr.com/4076/4925547889_4a9a29073a.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>One surprisingly painless border crossing later, and we were in Vancouver for the Zombie A-Go-Go. There was a line outside the door when doors opened, and by the time I was on stage the club was packed full of (remarkably well-costumed) zombies. Zombie cops, zombie flapper girls, zombie gangsters, zombie groupies, zombie fairies (what?), zombie movie stars. Zombies zombies zombies.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5329" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4925550411/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5329" src="http://static.flickr.com/4075/4925550411_8d09b2ed40.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>Everyone was a bit worried that the crowd wasn’t going to dig the music, since so many of the people were at the club as part of the zombie walk, but it was easily one of the most enthusiastic dancefloors of the entire tour to date.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5366" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4926146340/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5366" src="http://static.flickr.com/4141/4926146340_daae886810.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>We grabbed a quick bite to eat after the doors closed, and then it was right back in the car to make it to Edmonton for the next show. The crowd there was small, but seemed to be comprised entirely of electronic musicians who were all <em>listening</em>, if you know what I mean.</p>
<p>Audra left back to Ottawa the next morning, and after a long and emotionally numbing day at the West Edmonton Mall, we got in the car at 5am to head off to Winnipeg for yesterday’s show.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_5404" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4926148506/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_5404" src="http://static.flickr.com/4136/4926148506_a300d4d75d.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>Stay tuned!</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/FhIDSdMsiFs" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>Tragedy (For Us): Going Down</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/bU-OiKGeEbs/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/avs/2612/tragedy-for-us-going-down/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 14 Aug 2010 17:21:53 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Ad·ver·sary]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[industrial]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nth in a series]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2612</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[DC.


Baltimore was fantastic. Soundcheck was a total clusterfuck, but after we got everything working, it kept working well. They had a four-projector video wall and some very talented VJs who worked very hard to make us look like we were a nightclub from the future.

Worms of The Earth opened, which was great. Last time I [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>DC.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4079" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891353982/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4079" src="http://static.flickr.com/4074/4891353982_a223251562.jpg" /></a></p>
<p><a title="IMG_4063" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891351298/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4063" src="http://static.flickr.com/4102/4891351298_cb4215e546.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>Baltimore was fantastic. Soundcheck was a total clusterfuck, but after we got everything working, it kept working well. They had a four-projector video wall and some very talented VJs who worked very hard to make us look like we were a nightclub from the future.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4165" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4890799149/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4165" src="http://static.flickr.com/4115/4890799149_a7c91a501d.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>Worms of The Earth opened, which was great. Last time I saw him play was a year or two ago in Quebec City, and while I don’t remember a shirtless finale then, it worked well for Baltimore. The club was packed by the time we went on stage, and it was a killer show. The best of the tour so far, for sure. </p>
<p><a title="IMG_4231" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891398076/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4231" src="http://static.flickr.com/4140/4891398076_65d6d6c218.jpg" /></a></p>
<p><a title="DSC_0345" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891396360/"><img border="0" alt="DSC_0345" src="http://static.flickr.com/4073/4891396360_cb07b5d587.jpg" /></a></p>
<p><a title="IMG_4298" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891398774/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4298" src="http://static.flickr.com/4139/4891398774_f02c77fe09.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>Next: New Orleans. </p>
<p>I had thought I was prepared for what the city was going to look like. Not at all. I don’t know what it looked like right after Katrina, but it’s still a disaster zone today. Families living on traffic medians, block after block looking like it has been bombed out. We were only there for an evening, but the city broke my heart.</p>
<p>The show itself took place in a house turned fucked-up voodoo house turned art gallery turned concert venue. The owner drove a white hearse covered in skulls and marked front-to-back with sigils. There were altars in every corner of every room, bones and offerings to appease or antagonize the loas, and a couple nine year old kids running around playing hide and seek.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4399" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4890817895/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4399" src="http://static.flickr.com/4101/4890817895_130ba9819b.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>The sound system they had was completely unprepared for the kind of horrible noises we wanted to make, but they picked up a new system and brought it in for us within an hour or two, and then we were ready to roll.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4433" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891417292/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4433" src="http://static.flickr.com/4073/4891417292_ea278694b5.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>After leaving NOLA, we spent two nights driving through Texas, with pit stops in Austin and El Paso. We made a pilgrimage to The Jackalope, ate some amazing Mexican food, but with over ten hours of driving a day, there wasn’t much room for sight seeing.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4486" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891366368/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4486" src="http://static.flickr.com/4076/4891366368_a02c2670d1.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>We arrived in Arizona yesterday. I have never, ever felt heat like the heat here. It was 46c when we arrived in Phoenix that afternoon, and it was 43c when we got back to the hotel that night after the show. </p>
<p>Yann and Scott were both loopy and twitchy from the heat, but I’d love to spend an entire summer down here.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4589" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891373852/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4589" src="http://static.flickr.com/4101/4891373852_f5ac1b8f45.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>The club we played at had an incredible system, but we were competing with Rasputina down the street (and, elsewhere, Weird Al!) and the attendance was the lowest on the tour so far. The people that were there were enthusiastic, though. I’d rather have a dozen people watching and cheering than two dozen talking over the music. I’m looking at you, Boston.</p>
<p><a title="IMG_4659" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4891378006/"><img border="0" alt="IMG_4659" src="http://static.flickr.com/4078/4891378006_ec7ed68d6c.jpg" /></a></p>
<p>Yesterday was Los Angeles. Stay Tuned!</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/bU-OiKGeEbs" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>Tour Diary of The Future</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/4UH8aWzww0k/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/avs/2610/tour-diary-of-the-future/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sat, 07 Aug 2010 08:39:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Ad·ver·sary]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[tour diary]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2610</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I’m writing this as we drive out of NYC, onwards to Baltimore and beyond. We’re four shows in so far, and we’re about to hit a heavy stretch of driving in the next few days.
We started out in Montreal, where we had a killer show at Saphir. People were screaming, sound was fantastic, and a [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I’m writing this as we drive out of NYC, onwards to Baltimore and beyond. We’re four shows in so far, and we’re about to hit a heavy stretch of driving in the next few days.</p>
<p>We started out in Montreal, where we had a killer show at Saphir. People were screaming, sound was fantastic, and a lot of friends (including the lovely Audra!) were there to support us.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="The Setup" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4850466462/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4094/4850466462_8dcd21bb4d.jpg" border="0" alt="The Setup" width="375" height="500" /></a></p>
<p>The next day we headed to Quebec City, where our hosts treated us like kings with an amazing burger barbeque, and let us clutter up their lovely home with all of our crap. The show was solid; not as many people were there as the promoter had hoped, but the room was still packed full of enthusiastic people, and we sold a lot of merch.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3855" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4867747237/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4119/4867747237_01eaae2e2f.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3855" width="375" height="500" /></a></p>
<p>We went back to Montreal for a few days to regroup and prepare for the rest of the tour. (The great thing about having two shows so close to home with a few days off after is that you get to see all the holes in your planning, and you get a chance to fix them.</p>
<p>There was a lot of ass-busting work, but there was also a chance to spend some time with new, amazing people. It was a great way to spend our last few days in Canada.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3792" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4868369280/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4099/4868369280_06f567e75a.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3792" width="500" height="375" align="middle" /></a></p>
<p>So, after a lot of tetris magic packing all our stuff, and an uneventful-yet-incredibly-time-consuming stop at the border to process our artist visas, we were in the US, never to return.</p>
<p>With that said, probably we’ll return to Canada in a few weeks.</p>
<p>We played Boston on Wednesday and New York on Thursday.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3823" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4868359164/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4118/4868359164_2200454905.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3823" width="500" height="375" /></a></p>
<p>The Boston crew did a really great job turning a wood-panelled bar into an awesome looking electronic venue, but the crowd didn’t really turn out for it. And most of the crowd that did spent their time talking loudly over the bands. We lost money on the show for sure. We did, however, get to see some old friends, pick up a lot of new merch, and high-five each other a lot for actually making it into the US legally.</p>
<p>New York is always a fun place to be. The promoter put us up in a hotel in SoHo, bought us delicious pizza, and even had stagehands for moving all of our shit up and down two flights of stairs.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3843" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4867746445/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4143/4867746445_b6f8d4855f.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3843" width="375" height="500" /></a></p>
<p>The show itself was great, if a bit weird. All of my/Yann’s industrial scene New York friends who said they were going to be there never materialized (except you, Lenny – you’re a hero), but all the invited non-industrial scene people showed.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3850" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4868360272/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4078/4868360272_84564f3181.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3850" width="375" height="500" /></a></p>
<p>The opening act had a really tough time. They played a lot of unstructured noisescape stuff, mixed with some really heavy broken beat tracks, and the crowd was not into it at all (which especially sucks since the promoter pushed back the start times by an hour so people would get a chance to see them). They had some great sounds but it was clearly not what anyone was expecting.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3885" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4868360862/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4121/4868360862_8589acd4c0.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3885" width="500" height="375" /></a></p>
<p>I played both heavier and dancier than I have so far on the tour, and the crowd responded really fucking well to it. It was a fun set to play, trying to find a balance between something that the tough-crowd industrial crew would enjoy, and something that wasn’t going to alienate people who weren’t wearing all black.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3905" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4868361116/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4116/4868361116_3073873f05.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3905" width="500" height="375" /></a></p>
<p>My sister was in attendance (bless her hip-hop heart),  and she told me that someone who was dancing to my set leaned over and said “this guy is just so FIERCE!” – made my fucking night.</p>
<p>Sadly, due to the show start time getting pushed back, by the time Yann was on stage to work his Iszoloscope magic, at least half the people who had were there for the end of my set had left. People were still dancing and really into it, but there weren’t nearly as many bodies.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3944" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4868361292/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4102/4868361292_8c1e797e9d.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3944" width="375" height="500" /></a></p>
<p>After the show, Yann, Scott and I went out for a bite of food with my sister, who took us to an awesome little diner where the other patrons provided much entertainment.</p>
<p>We took it easy today, and spent the day wandering around Manhattan. Some time in Central Park, some time to explore the aircraft-carrier-turned-museum U.S.S. Intrepid, and some time to eat at a crazy awesome Italian place (with no sign out front) that a sassy black beat cop recommended to us.</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="IMG_3977" href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/10282509@N00/4868362646/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://static.flickr.com/4120/4868362646_00c38bb8d0.jpg" border="0" alt="IMG_3977" width="500" height="375" /></a></p>
<p>…and now, Baltimore bound!</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/4UH8aWzww0k" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>Tragedy (For Me) – First in a Series</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/zYhvwXZdAs0/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/avs/2602/tragedy-for-me-first-in-a-series/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Jul 2010 21:00:07 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Ad·ver·sary]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[industrial]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Nth in a series]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2602</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Tour Diary, day negative three. We play our first show in Montreal on Friday. Paperwork is in hand, merch is being shipped to Boston for us to collect on our 3rd show (sorry, Montreal and Quebec City), and aside from feeling like hell from fighting off a flu, everything&#8217;s great.
I&#8217;ve got a kickass new live [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://tragedyforus.com/">Tour Diary</a>, day negative three. We play <a href="http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=130602326980539&#038;ref=search">our first show in Montreal</a> on Friday. Paperwork is in hand, merch is being shipped to Boston for us to collect on our 3rd show (sorry, Montreal and Quebec City), and aside from feeling like hell from fighting off a flu, everything&#8217;s great.</p>
<p>I&#8217;ve got a kickass new live rig:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/jairus/4835671560/in/pool-1412050@N20/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4146/4835671560_db3f8b48c0_z_d.jpg" alt="" width="480" height="640" /></a></p>
<p>&#8230;and some amazing designs for all my merch (courtesy of graphic designer extraordinaire Robert Nixon):</p>
<p><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/jairus/4835062927/in/pool-1412050@N20/"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4152/4835062927_8d14e5b34b_d.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="375" /></a></p>
<p><a href="http://www.fieggen.com/shoelace/straighteasylacing.htm">Lace up your combats</a> and <a href="http://www.etymotic.com/ephp/er20-buynow.aspx">order your earplugs</a>, we&#8217;re just about ready to roll.</p>
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		<item>
		<title>If you want a picture of the future</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/96HsOe9UQSA/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/politics/2598/if-you-want-a-picture-of-the-future/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 28 Jun 2010 00:02:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2598</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://thestar.blogs.com/photoblog/2010/06/peaceful-beginings-violent-ending-as-g20-protests-grip-toronto.html"><img class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-2599" title="boot" src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/06/boot-570x633.jpg" alt="" width="570" height="633" /></a></p>
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		<item>
		<title>Certain Features of the Historical Development of Toronto</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/BlvbtBHyjWE/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/politics/2594/certain-features-of-the-historical-development-of-toronto/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Sun, 27 Jun 2010 11:37:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[anarchy]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2594</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[A post for my brothers, both literal and figurative, trying to stay safe in Toronto:
The anarchist concept of &#8220;direct action&#8221; has been corrupted- mostly by those who claim the anarchist label- beyond all recognition in recent years, especially in North America, and, of course, beyond all measure in the USA. [...] The classic such act [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://mollymew.blogspot.com/2010/05/anarchist-theory-vandalism-and-direct.html">A post for my brothers, both literal and figurative, trying to stay safe in Toronto</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p>The anarchist concept of &#8220;direct action&#8221; has been corrupted- mostly by those who claim the anarchist label- beyond all recognition in recent years, especially in North America, and, of course, beyond all measure in the USA. [...] The classic such act would have been IWW walkouts at a certain hour to enforce a certain working time. What does this mean ? It means that direct action is something that has an immediate effect, or at least the possibility of same. That it corrects an injustice or advances the interests of the oppressed not in some American psychobabble way but in a real material result. </p>
<p>Such actions are totally disconnected from how &#8220;militant&#8221; or &#8220;violent&#8221; such actions are. They may be &#8220;militant&#8221;. They may be violent&#8221;. In most cases, however, they are neither. The foundation of an &#8220;infoshop&#8221; for instance is &#8220;direct action&#8221;. Bombing a newspaper station because you think they &#8217;support capitalism&#8221; is not. The former actually accomplishes something and is a direct response to correct a problem. The latter is (an invariably juvenile) expression of personal frustration that accomplishes nothing.</p></blockquote>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/BlvbtBHyjWE" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Nuclear Summer at the Diefenbunker</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/u_gwoEmR80Q/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/photos/2590/nuclear-summer-at-the-diefenbunker/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 07 Jun 2010 18:18:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Photography]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[atoms]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2590</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Took a trip to a cold war government bunker over the weekend:


]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Took <a href="http://www.flickriver.com/photos/jairus/sets/72157624224865770/">a trip to a cold war government bunker</a> over the weekend:</p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="MIL-KO! by Jairus, on Flickr" href="http://bighugelabs.com/onblack.php?id=4673624887&amp;size=large"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4045/4673624887_f992c9e8b3.jpg" alt="MIL-KO!" width="500" height="375" /></a></p>
<p style="text-align: center;"><a title="Dark Clouds over Diefenbunker by Jairus, on Flickr" href="http://bighugelabs.com/onblack.php?id=4673620267&amp;size=large"><img class="aligncenter" src="http://farm5.static.flickr.com/4057/4673620267_5d21f0316d.jpg" alt="Dark Clouds over Diefenbunker" width="500" height="375" /></a></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/u_gwoEmR80Q" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>NurtureShock</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/FFffe-ulG8o/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/politics/2588/nurtureshock/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 02 Jun 2010 20:13:43 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[race]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[racism]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2588</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[How to Raise Racist Kids:
Step One: Don’t talk about race. Don’t point out skin color. Be “color blind.”
Step Two: Actually, that’s it. There is no Step Two.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.wired.com/geekdad/2010/02/how-to-raise-racist-kids/">How to Raise Racist Kids</a>:</p>
<blockquote><p><strong>Step One:</strong> Don’t talk about race. Don’t point out skin color. Be “color blind.”</p>
<p><strong>Step Two:</strong> Actually, that’s it. There is no Step Two.</p></blockquote>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/FFffe-ulG8o" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Dear Maman</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/or1uiIm4izc/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/design/2583/dear-maman/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 31 May 2010 20:11:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Design]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[RIP]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2583</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Louise Bourgeois has left us.

Louise Bourgeois, the French-born American artist who gained fame only late in a long career, when her psychologically charged abstract sculptures, drawings and prints had a galvanizing effect on younger artists, particularly women, died on Monday at the Beth Israel Medical Center in Manhattan. She was 98.
We owe her the only [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://artsbeat.blogs.nytimes.com/2010/05/31/louise-bourgeois-artist-and-sculptor-is-dead/">Louise Bourgeois has left us</a>.</p>
<p><a href="http://bighugelabs.com/onblack.php?id=3047570618&amp;size=large"><img class="size-large wp-image-2584" title="Maman" src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/05/maman-570x345.jpg" alt="" width="570" height="345" /></a></p>
<blockquote><p>Louise Bourgeois, the French-born American artist who gained fame only late in a long career, when her psychologically charged abstract sculptures, drawings and prints had a galvanizing effect on younger artists, particularly women, died on Monday at the Beth Israel Medical Center in Manhattan. She was 98.</p></blockquote>
<p>We owe her the only worthwhile public sculpture in the city. I always hoped she might gift us with another.</p>
<p><cite>(Photo by Geekstalt)</cite></p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/or1uiIm4izc" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Six Degrees of Awesome</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/70MF0Xda2iY/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/music/2580/six-degrees-of-awesome/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 26 May 2010 02:20:25 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Music]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Ad·ver·sary]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2580</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[From me to Johnny Cash in 5 steps.

I (Ad·ver·sary) was remixed by J.F. Coleman (of Phylr)
J.F. Coleman was in Baby Zizanie with J.G. Thirlwell
J.G. Thirlwell was in The The with Sinead O&#8217;Connor
Sinead O&#8217;Connor wrote &#8220;Don&#8217;t Give Up&#8221; with Willie Nelson
Willie Nelson was in The Highwaymen with Johnny Cash!

Huzzah!
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>From me to Johnny Cash in 5 steps.</p>
<ol>
<li>I (Ad·ver·sary) was remixed by J.F. Coleman (of Phylr)</li>
<li>J.F. Coleman was in Baby Zizanie with J.G. Thirlwell</li>
<li>J.G. Thirlwell was in The The with Sinead O&#8217;Connor</li>
<li>Sinead O&#8217;Connor wrote &#8220;Don&#8217;t Give Up&#8221; with Willie Nelson</li>
<li>Willie Nelson was in The Highwaymen with Johnny Cash!</li>
</ol>
<p>Huzzah!</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/70MF0Xda2iY" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<item>
		<title>Triumph 31</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/B5mTMV20u1A/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/science/2564/triumph-31/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 25 May 2010 20:39:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Geekdom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SCIENCE!]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[birthday]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2564</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Saturday was my birthday, which capped off a week of the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I thought &#8217;shingles&#8217; sounded like some weird hilarious skin condition that made you look like a lizard or perhaps the roof of a country home. I am pretty doped up on painkillers at the moment [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Saturday was my birthday, which capped off a week of the worst pain I have ever felt in my life. I thought &#8217;shingles&#8217; sounded like some weird hilarious skin condition that made you look like a lizard or perhaps the roof of a country home. I am pretty doped up on painkillers at the moment but I believe it is fair to say I was off base there.</p>
<p>Anyway.</p>
<p>Saturday was my birthday! I received very nearly a <em>hundred</em> birthday greetings and well-wishes, which I am totally floored by. Thank you all so much.</p>
<p>Audra got me a present! It is a toothbrush! </p>
<p>Let me tell you about this toothbrush!</p>
<p><a href="http://media.restraint.org/2010/05/triumph-over.jpg"><img src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/05/triumph-over-570x910.jpg" alt="" title="TRIUMPH" width="570" height="910" class="aligncenter size-large wp-image-2572" /></a></p>
<p>It is the <a href="http://the-gadgeteer.com/2007/08/09/oral_b_triumph_9910/">ORAL-B TRIUMPH PROFESSIONAL CARE 9900</a>, MOTHERFUCKERS. </p>
<p>Do not mock this toothbrush, it is SERIOUS BUSINESS! Witness this FLOSS-ACTION HEAD!</p>
<p><img src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/05/triumph-2.jpg" alt="" title="triumph-2" width="461" height="500" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-2566" /></p>
<p>IT MEANS BUSINESS. Does YOUR toothbrush come with this much stuff?</p>
<p><img src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/05/triumph-3.jpg" alt="" title="triumph-3" width="500" height="332" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-2567" /></p>
<p>I DON&#8217;T THINK SO! Does YOUR toothbrush have a base station that wirelessly monitors your use of the oscillating-rotating technology-enhanced brush using the 2.4 GHz ISM band?</p>
<p><img src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/05/triumph-4.jpg" alt="" title="triumph-4" width="500" height="309" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-2568" /></p>
<p>IT IS UNLIKELY! Does YOUR toothbrush include a separate ProWhite polishing brushhead and a massage mode for optimum gum health?</p>
<p>If it does, you are the proud owner of a <a href="http://the-gadgeteer.com/2007/08/09/oral_b_triumph_9910/">ORAL-B TRIUMPH PROFESSIONAL CARE 9900</a> and I would like to meet with you regularly to discuss how much better our toothbrushes are than everyone elses! Do you remember life before the <a href="http://the-gadgeteer.com/2007/08/09/oral_b_triumph_9910/">ORAL-B TRIUMPH PROFESSIONAL CARE 9900</a>? I hardly do. Can you imagine, MANUALLY moving the bristles around on the end of a stick like some kind of barbarian?</p>
<p><img src="http://media.restraint.org/2010/05/barbarian.jpg" alt="" title="barbarian" width="250" height="300" class="aligncenter size-full wp-image-2569" /></p>
<p>Neither can I.</p>
<p>So, thank you, Audra, for this amazing birthday gift! Thank you for elevating me over all of those people I once considered &#8216;friends&#8217; to the lofty position I now occupy, which I do not think is hyperbolic to describe as &#8216;godlike&#8217;.</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/B5mTMV20u1A" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Where I Been</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/XLc6cFG9yNw/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/misc/2561/where-i-been/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 20 May 2010 14:39:29 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Misc]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2561</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[I&#8217;ve been spending a lot of time lately at my (often NSFW) Tumblr. Won&#8217;t you join me?
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I&#8217;ve been spending a lot of time lately at <a href="http://tumblr.restraint.org/">my (often NSFW) Tumblr</a>. Won&#8217;t you join me?</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/XLc6cFG9yNw" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>The War Against Free (or: Oh Crap!)</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/cklpyEgnnx8/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/music/2557/the-war-against-free-or-oh-crap/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 11 May 2010 16:06:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Music]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[copyright]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2557</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Why record labels will never win the war against free: An experiment.
The whole file sharing phenomenon (and legal music downloading) is largely driven by a powerful psychological aversion to being cheated.
It turns out that free is so powerful not because it’s free, but because it allows us to minimize the risk of being cheated. Duke [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Why record labels will never win the war against free: <a href="http://madepublishing.com/wp/2010/05/record_labels_waged_war_on_human_psychology/">An experiment</a>.</p>
<blockquote><p>The whole file sharing phenomenon (and legal music downloading) is largely driven by a powerful psychological aversion to being cheated.</p>
<p>It turns out that free is so powerful not because it’s free, but because it allows us to minimize the risk of being cheated. Duke University behavioral economist Dan Ariely conducted an interesting experiment to understand “free”, which he writes about in his book Predictably Irrational. </p>
<p>First, he and his colleagues sold random college students two kinds of chocolates. One was Lindt Truffles from Switzerland. The second was Hersheys Kisses. The truffles were 15 cents and the Kisses were 1 cent. The students reasoned that the difference in price between the two chocolates was due to quality. 73% chose the truffles and 27% chose the Kisses.</p>
<p>Then Ariely did something interesting. He introduced free into the experiment. He lowered the price of each chocolate by 1 cent, so the truffles were now 14 cents and the Kisses were free. All of a sudden, preference for the Kisses skyrocketed.</p>
<p>Ariely concluded that free is so enticing because it eliminates the risk of buyer’s remorse, or what I like to call the “Oh, crap!” factor. Nobody wants to buy something and then discover that it’s not what they expected. Even if the price of that thing is just a few cents, the psychological aversion still exists. When something is free, that risk is eliminated entirely. It may still not be what you expected, but at least you didn’t lose anything by paying for it.</p></blockquote>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/cklpyEgnnx8" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Can Nothing Stop Computo?!</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/hjSvoXA59F4/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/detritus/2555/can-nothing-stop-computo/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 Apr 2010 18:59:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Links and Other Such Detritus]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/detritus/2555/can-nothing-stop-computo/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Can Nothing Stop Computo?! &#8211; Turns out, no.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://the-isb.blogspot.com/2006/08/can-nothing-stop-computo.html">Can Nothing Stop Computo?!</a> &#8211; Turns out, no.</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/hjSvoXA59F4" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Joan Caulfield, McCall’s Magazine, 1941</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/IJSaodP-0Qk/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/misc/2550/joan-caulfield-1941/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 28 Apr 2010 18:28:08 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Misc]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/writing/2550/mccall-cover-joan-caulfield/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[
(Via the Flickr Blog.)
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p style="text-align: center;"><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/george_eastman_house/3122875223/"><img class="aligncenter" title="McCall Cover, Joan Caulfield" src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3197/3122875223_917b1ccafc.jpg" alt="" width="500" height="414" /></a></p>
<p><cite>(Via the <a href="http://blog.flickr.net/en/2010/04/28/cats-in-the-commons/">Flickr Blog</a>.)</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/IJSaodP-0Qk" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>What Happened When I Went Undercover at a Christian Gay-to-Straight Conversion Camp</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/BVPWdZ0q01o/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/detritus/2548/what-happened-when-i-went-undercover-at-a-christian-gay-to-straight-conversion-camp/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Apr 2010 18:50:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Links and Other Such Detritus]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2548</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[What Happened When I Went Undercover at a Christian Gay-to-Straight Conversion Camp &#8211; What could be less gay than a bunch of men pressing tightly against each other and whispering in each other&#8217;s ears?
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://www.alternet.org/module/printversion/146557">What Happened When I Went Undercover at a Christian Gay-to-Straight Conversion Camp</a> &#8211; What could be less gay than a bunch of men pressing tightly against each other and whispering in each other&#8217;s ears?</p>
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		<title>Sampla tests your video game music knowledge, reflexes</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/L13Y8xOANNQ/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/detritus/2546/sampla-tests-your-video-game-music-knowledge-reflexes/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 27 Apr 2010 18:48:40 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Links and Other Such Detritus]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2546</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Sampla tests your video game music knowledge, reflexes &#8211; 2260 on my first run through.
]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><a href="http://johnfreeborn.com/games/geek_sampla/">Sampla tests your video game music knowledge, reflexes</a> &#8211; 2260 on my first run through.</p>
<img src="http://feeds.feedburner.com/~r/restraint/~4/L13Y8xOANNQ" height="1" width="1"/>]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Homoerotic Sexual Terrorism</title>
		<link>http://feedproxy.google.com/~r/restraint/~3/OdHrgqz6yok/</link>
		<comments>http://restraint.org/politics/2537/homoerotic-sexual-terrorism/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 Apr 2010 21:11:16 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Jairus</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Politics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[prison]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[racism]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://restraint.org/?p=2537</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[This information and analysis was compiled elsewhere, not by me. The majority of the information comes from the thirteen-volume report of the Joint Select Committee established by Congress in 1871 to &#8220;inquire into the condition of affairs in the late insurrectionary states&#8221;.
&#8220;The Klan Report&#8221; contains dozens of accounts, many of them firsthand, of men and [...]]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>This information and analysis was compiled elsewhere, not by me. The majority of the information comes from the thirteen-volume report of the Joint Select Committee established by Congress in 1871 to &#8220;inquire into the condition of affairs in the late insurrectionary states&#8221;.</p>
<p>&#8220;The Klan Report&#8221; contains dozens of accounts, many of them firsthand, of men and women of both races who were the objects of sexual terror. (If you are uncomfortable with descriptions and analysis of racial and sexual terrorism, you probably don&#8217;t want to read any further.)</p>
<p>The utility of the Report is further enhanced by the fact that testimony, substantial portions of which are confirmed by external sources, was elicited across a wide spectrum of southern society, from the humblest freedpeople to the most esteemed planters and politicians.</p>
<p>An illustrative example from one of South Carolina&#8217;s major Ku Klux Klan trials evokes something of the texture and meanings that may be gleaned from the historical record of these atrocities.</p>
<blockquote><p>Arguing for the defense, Cyrus Melton seeks to vindicate his client by employing a familiar courtroom tactic &#8211; refuting guilt through emotive reference to the heinousness of the crime alleged. With studied disbelief, he queries &#8220;Was ravishing helpless women a part of this conspiracy?&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;We have had here, from women, details of the most disgusting character, put forward for the purpose of showing from this act that ravishing women was one of the purposes of this organization. Now, I ask you, do you believe it, and that there did exist upon the face of God&#8217;s earth an organization which would have among its purposes that of committing these gross outrages upon helpless women?&#8221;</p></blockquote>
<p>While he plainly oversimplified the prosecution&#8217;s position for rhetorical effect, it is nonetheless true that the KKK and its imitators purposefully resorted not only to rape, but to an entire spectrum of sexual crime as a means of advancing their agenda. <strong>Whereas Melton depicts the &#8220;ravishing&#8221; of freedwomen as an unintended, even regrettable, consequence of klansmanship, I contend that <span style="text-decoration: underline;">sexual terror</span> was in actuality among the KKK&#8217;s most starkly defining features, designedly effected to compromise the stability, resolve, and selfhood of the newly freed slaves at the same time it punished their white &#8220;accomplices&#8221; as traitors to their race</strong>, thereby denying them the privileges of color that would otherwise have accrued.</p>
<h3> A. Group Sexualized Whipping</h3>
<p>Of the thousands of physical assaults perpetrated by the Reconstruction-era Klan, whipping was by far the most commonplace.<br />
Klansmen exercised little restraint in these attacks, subjecting men, women, and children of all ages and colors to brutal lashings that resulted in the deaths of many and serious injury to countless more.</p>
<p>While it would be an overstatement to assert that all, or even most, of these attacks were unambiguously sexual in nature, it is fair to say that even<strong>&#8220;ordinary&#8221; klan whippings often bore a distinctly sexualized cast.</strong></p>
<p><strong><span id="more-2537"></span></strong></p>
<p>Thus, when a Freedmen&#8217;s Bureau official describes a klan raid in which several freedpeople have been &#8220;taken from their beds at night and severely whipped and shamefully bruised,&#8221; there is every possibility that what is &#8220;shameful&#8221; is not merely the violence itself, but its implied sexualization.</p>
<p>Hannah Travis, an ex-slave intimately familiar with the ways of the Klan, describes an almost identical episode in which the nightriders pulled a pregnant woman from her bed and demanded that she dance while her husband helplessly looked on.&#8217; Some attacks were more overtly sexual still. Thomas Settle provided testimony regarding an episode in which klansmen &#8220;took a young negro man who was in the house that night and whipped him, and compelled him to go through the form of sexual intercourse with one of the girls, whipping him at the same time,&#8221; all of this in the presence of the girl&#8217;s father.&#8217;</p>
<p>The sexualized nature of many klan whippings can be read most clearly by looking to the locus of punishment and the manner in which these chastisements were administered. Surveying what is known about the injured body, ample testimony suggests that <strong>klansmen frequently chose victims&#8217; breasts and genitals as special targets of their enmity.</strong>&#8221; Exemplifying this method, Sally Hall and her two daughters were taken from their home and severely lashed, whereupon &#8220;one of them [was] made to exhibit her person whilst the fiends proceeded to inflict blows upon her private parts.&#8221;</p>
<p>In these and many other assaults, the objectives of chastisement were not realized through the generation of pain and fear alone; rather, the klans actively set out to degrade their victims, and regularly did so by employing methods laden with sexual overtones.</p>
<p>The category of whipping that is perhaps most indisputably sexualized involved forcibly stripping victims prior to or during a klan offensive, a tradition dating back to shaming practices in the plantation fields.</p>
<p>As the title of this thread suggestions, homo-erotic overtones overlayed these frequent experiences.</p>
<p>Caswell Holt, a North Carolina freedman, testified that a band of nightriders:</p>
<blockquote><p>Q: I understood you to say that a colored woman was ravaged by the<br />
Ku-Klux?<br />
A: Yes. sir.<br />
Q: Did you hear of any other case of that sort?<br />
A: Oh, yes, several times. That has been very common. The case I spoke of was close by me, and that is the reason I spoke of it. It has got to be an old saying.<br />
Q: You say it was common for the Ku-Klux to do that?<br />
A: Yes, sir. They say that if the women tell anything about it, they will kill them.</p></blockquote>
<p>In response to a question about the prevalence of rape in and around Rutherford County, North Carolina, state representative James M. Justice replied,</p>
<blockquote><p>I was told by an old colored woman. and one entitled to credit. I think &#8211; her word, I think. would be believed by everybody who knows her &#8211; that some of her kinfolk who lived down in the country were in great trouble about things of that sort. She said that when the Ku-Klux had gone after a negro man in some places they had attempted, and in other places they had actually committed, rape upon colored women in the presence of their husbands. This old woman told it to me as a secret, for she said she was afraid to have it known, for fear they would kill her.&#8217;</p></blockquote>
<p>A Freedmen&#8217;s Bureau agent thus recounted an extended KKK rampage in which <strong>participants traveled from Haysville, Georgia, towards Meriden, Louisiana, &#8220;stopping at all cabins on their route committing violence and maltreating women.&#8221;</strong></p>
<p>In the intervening years, the klans conducted raids like this one throughout the former Confederacy, with freedwomen and girls their usual targets. Henry Willis provided testimony in an illustrative case involving a Klan-style attack on the homes of several freedpeople residing in Robertson County, Tennessee. After threatening sexual violence against Willis&#8217;s mother, the culprits turned instead to his twelve year-old sister, raping her &#8220;one after the other.&#8221;</p>
<p>Same-sex rape was common as well.</p>
<blockquote><p>A Freedmen&#8217;s Bureau agent stationed in Columbia, Tennessee thus attested that one <strong>Mr. Thurman and his two sons had been taken from their home by &#8220;a squad of Ku Klux&#8221;</strong> and dragged deep into the woods &#8220;where they were shamefully abused, knocked about with pistols &amp; clubs.&#8221;</p>
<p>The KKK likewise &#8220;maltreated&#8221; Preston Bush in the course of a raid upon the freedman&#8217;s home, and were said to have perpetrated a &#8220;similar outrage&#8221; against two other local freedmen.</p></blockquote>
<p>Here, acts of same-sex sexual violence are best understood as occurring within a loosely heterosexual paradigm in which the victim is gendered female.</p>
<p>Treating other men &#8220;like women,&#8221; dominating them sexually, physically, and emotionally, was then, as now, a readily available means of humiliating a male enemy. Klansmen thus relied on rape and other sex crimes against men as a convenient and effective means of accomplishing their larger aims, but more clearly rape was a means of achieving group homoerotic sexual satisfaction.</p>
<h3>C. Genital Torture and Mutilation</h3>
<p>Whipping and rape were by no means the only forms of sexual terror employed by the klans; genital torture and mutilation also figured prominently among their methods.</p>
<p>Extant sources suggest that<strong> men and women, overwhelmingly black, were subjected to these abuses in roughly equal numbers.</strong></p>
<p>Outrages of this sort persisted during the Civil War, when they were arbitrarily carried out by marauding soldiers from both camps and after, when they were executed with heightened intensity by the white supremacist klans.</p>
<p>It was with little hyperbole that Albion Tourgke&#8217;s &#8220;Fool&#8221; characterized Reconstruction as an era marred by:</p>
<blockquote><p>&#8220;the mutilation of men and women in methods too shocking and barbarous to be recounted,&#8221; replete with tragic encounters that left freedmen &#8220;mutilated beyond description, tortured beyond conception,&#8221; some &#8220;mangled,&#8221; &#8220;despoiled of manhood!&#8221;</p></blockquote>
<p><strong> Numerous witnesses provided evidence of the klans&#8217; peculiar fascination with the genitalia of freedmen.<br />
</strong></p>
<blockquote><p>&#8230;In multiple venues, he reported that a band of disguised men &#8220;gave [Trollinger] a thrashing and made him take out his privates and stick a knife through it. . . five or six times.&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8230;&#8221;The way they did him was, they tied him down on a log and took a buggytrace to him, and whipped one of his seed out and the other very nearly out.&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8230; the torture of a Jackson County freedman accused of cohabiting with a white woman:</p>
<p>&#8220;The colored man was taken out into the woods, a hole dug in the ground and a block buried in it, and his penis taken out, and a nail driven through it into the block; that a large butcher or cheese knife, as they call it, very sharp, was laid down by him, and lightwood piled around him and set on fire;<strong> the knife was put there so that he could cut [his penis] off and get away, or stay there and burn up.</strong> Doctor Swinney said that he cut it off and jumped out.&#8221;</p></blockquote>
<p>A Georgia man recalled that klansmen had stripped, whipped, and genitally mutilated a number of poor whites of both sexes.</p>
<p>It may be tempting to dismiss so grotesque an attack as an isolated manifestation of personal depravity, but in reality it was a systemic homoerotic method carried out across the South during all of reconstruction.</p>
<h3>
D. Really Gay Lynchings<br />
</h3>
<p>For all of its relentlessly sexual connotations, postbellum southern lynching has not traditionally been understood as a sex crime per se, but sexual transgressions, real and imagined, have been standard justifications for the crime since the antebellum era. <strong>Like other methods of sexualized violence purveyed by the Reconstruction klans, perpetrators as well as sympathetic bystanders could approach lynching as a sexual encounter.</strong></p>
<p>These blood-drenched spectacles, with their defilement, desecration, and display of the oppositional body, are suffused with sexual meaning.</p>
<p>Though white men and black women were occasionally targeted by lynch mobs, the usual victim was a black man suddenly wrested from his home or, as often happened, forcibly removed from judicial custody.<br />
<strong><br />
He was frequently castrated by his assailants, reflecting what one southern historian has described as the &#8220;subconscious envy and sexual frustration&#8221; that animated the group homosocial practice.<br />
</strong></p>
<p>In this respect, the lynch mob can be seen as enacting a metaphorical rape, one in which the feared black man is made to act &#8220;like a woman,&#8221; submitting to the superior will of his antagonists. As Trudier Harris perceptively argues,<strong> lynchings function as a &#8220;communal rape of the black man by the crowd which executes him.</strong> They violate him by exposing the most private parts of his body and by forcing him, finally, into ultimate submission to them.</p>
<blockquote><p>A witness providing testimony in the lynching death of the freedman Nelson Harris conveyed that the victim had been castrated through casual reference to &#8220;the parts found.&#8221;</p>
<p>&#8220;He had been skinned. His skin was hanging over his neck, and his privates had been cut off and put in his mouth.&#8221;</p></blockquote>
<p>When klansmen chose this method of lynching their antagonists, they became participants in the entirety of the spectacle, not just part of it, and that spectacle often included the studied exposure of the size, shape, and power of the mythological black penis. Let&#8217;s not forget the immense popularity of lynching postcards, photos, and souvenirs (including body parts).</p>
<p>Just as the prospect of sexual mutilation can be seen to permeate the entire exhibition, so too did sex itself, for in their quest to possess, inscribe, and finally obliterate the bodies of their victims, lynch mobs unwittingly revealed the awful coalescence of sexual rage, desire, frustration, and obsession that constrained them to act as they did.</p>
<h3>E. Conclusions</h3>
<p>In the immediate postwar years, and for some time thereafter, southern white men as a body underwent a crisis in masculinity that is essential to comprehending the seemingly irrepressible violence of Reconstruction.</p>
<p>That so much klan violence would assume a distinctly sexual cast is a reflection not only of the magnitude of these fears, but also of their deeply personal nature, driven as they were by a set of imperatives that included regenerating a white masculinity severely depleted by defeat in war, maintaining racial hierarchy in the face of freedpeople&#8217;s demands for access to the full benefits of citizenship, and, finally, reasserting the right of sexual property in women of both races.</p>
<p>Practices around the sexual control of people of color have continued to this day. We should look at the prison-rape epidemic as an extension of these practices &#8211; the control of black bodies and the sexual humiliation and torture that comes with white &#8216;judicial&#8217; proceedings.</p>
<p>The mechanism that created white masculinity in Reconstruction, <span style="text-decoration: underline;">racialized punishment by homoerotic sexual torture</span>, has fundamentally not changed but embedded itself in the systems of &#8216;justice&#8217; practiced by the American state.</p>
<p>You have to understand the origins of the Prison system to see this in action. After Reconstruction, the prison system underwent a dramatic transformation, greatly increasing in size and population, and shifting in demographic to focus predominately on former slaves.</p>
<p>Prisons were built in the South as part of the backlash to Black Reconstruction and as a mechanism to re-enslave Black workers. In the late 19th-century South, an extensive prison system was developed in the interest of maintaining the racial and economic relationship of slavery.</p>
<p>Louisiana’s famous Angola Prison illustrates this history best. In 1880, this 8000-acre family plantation was purchased by the state of Louisiana and converted into a prison. Slave quarters became cell units. Now expanded to 18,000 acres, the Angola plantation is tilled by prisoners working the land — a chilling picture of modern day chattel slavery.</p>
<h4>The Wheel of&#8217; Servitude: Black Forced Labor After Slavery by D.A. Novak:</h4>
<blockquote><p>Prison labor became a more significant part of modern capitalism during Reconstruction because the Civil War made immigration to America dangerous, left the U.S. economically devastated, and deprived capitalism of its lucrative slave labor. One of the responses to these crises was to build more prisons and then to lease the labor of prisoners, many of whom were ex-slaves, to labor-hungry capitalists.</p></blockquote>
<p>The system provided revenue for the state and profits for plantation owners. In 1878, Georgia leased out 1,239 prisoners, and all but 115 were African American.</p>
<p>Much like the system of slavery from which it emerged, convict leasing was a violent and abusive system. The death rate of prisoners leased to railroad companies between 1877 and 1879 was 16 percent in Mississippi, 25 percent in Arkansas, and 45 percent in South Carolina.</p>
<p>When you realize that the Prison System is an extension of Slavery, then it makes sense that the system of punishment used to defend slavery (racialized punishment by sexual torture) would be integrated into the Prison system!</p>
<p>Black men are 1. profiled, 2. harassed, 3. arrested, 4. charged, 5. found guilty, 6. sentenced, and 7. denied parole at astronomically higher rates based on popular racist stereotypes and inequality.</p>
<p>They are then sentenced to prisons by white juries where rape is understood to be part of the punishment. Those rapes are often coordinated by white guards and ignored by white prison authorities.</p>
<p><em>In what way is that fundamentally different from a lynching?</em></p>
<p>In fact, this model has become so ingrained in white masculinity that almost all forms of white male violence recreate racialized punishment by sexual torture, including fraternity hazing and military campaigns.</p>
<p>The incidents at Abu Ghraib exemplify this trend. Male detainees were subject to vigilante sexual torture as &#8216;justice&#8217; for their crimes against white society, including &#8216;Sodomy with a broomstick and chemical light, rape of men and women, humiliation and nude torture, stacking naked men against eachother in homoerotic display, and &#8230;</p>
<blockquote><p>As Mr Mohamed told the UK Daily Mail, &#8220;they cut off my clothes with some kind of doctor&#8217;s scalpel. I was totally naked&#8230;. One of them took my penis in his hand and began to make cuts. He did it once, and they stood still for maybe a minute, catching my reaction.</p>
<p>&#8220;I was in agony, crying, trying desperately to suppress myself, but I was screaming&#8230;. They must have done this 20 to 30 times in maybe two hours&#8230;. They cut all over my private parts.&#8221;</p>
<p>This form of torture, Mr. Mohamed told David Cole of the Daily Mail, was repeated many times over the next 15 months.</p></blockquote>
<p>How can we not immediately think of the lynchings and mutilations of the Reconstruction era, or the rape that occurs in American prisons every day?</p>
<p>One could argue that, similar to the fall of the Confederacy, 9/11 had the effect of socially undermining the superiority of White Men, who then had to re-affirm that superiority by feminizing and homoerotically torturing Arab men.</p>
<p>But, more importantly, it&#8217;s clear that &#8216;racialized punishment by homoerotic sexual torture&#8217; has become one of the defining, accepted, popular characteristics of white male &#8220;justice&#8221; in America since it first came to popularity through the KKK.</p>
<p>If you have, against all odds, finished reading this and would like more background, <a href="http://www.accessmylibrary.com/coms2/summary_0286-25698451_ITM">this paper on sexualized racism and gendered violence</a> is a good place to start.</p>
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