1. Zend_Config
2. Zend_Db
3. Zend_Session_Namespace
4. Zend_Application_Bootstrap_Bootstrap
5. The fact that the Bootstrap has a Bootstrap
6. Zend_Forms
7. Action name CamelCase management

But, mostly, I had complaints: no API; no exclusion based permissions; no RSS/ATOM feed; no integration with Twitter or Facebook; difficult to share only a handful of photos in an album; default stream is not customizable.

I knew I would still use the service because, even with those short comings, it felt better than anything else. But I honestly expected that Facebook would be the service that I gave up time with to spend, instead with Google+. That isn’t the case, though.

Instead, it seems that I’ve reduced my usage of Twitter. Sure, I still post there as my primary “microblogging” location. It feeds to Facebook, so they both get updated with the same content. I have to manually cross post to Google+ so, in that regard, some things just never make it there. And, if someone leaves a comment (or a mention, or a reply) on any service (Twitter, Facebook, whatever) I almost always read it and respond when appropriate. But when it comes to catching up with the updates of other people, I’m fully caught up on Google+ and Facebook, but I’m way, way, way behind on a regular basis when it comes to Twitter.

I think there are a few main reason for this. First, Twitter encourages content-less updates. 140 characters is just not enough. It’s good for a link with a little comment. It’s good for a quick update on an ongoing event, issue, or topic. But, in many cases, it’s just not long enough for a complete thought or idea. So most of the updates there are meaningless.

Secondly, Twitter doesn’t give you an easy way to ignore, hide, or mute someone while still following them. Yes, you can make a list and just read that list. But adding people and removing people from a list takes like a billion clicks. Too many. Compare to Google+: when I first add someone to a Circle I also add them to “Inbox”. If I find they are too noisy or not interesting enough to take time out of my regular reading intervals, I just take them out of “Inbox”. I can still catch up with them later when I check “Friends” or “Family” or whatever other group they fall into. And if they don’t fall into any other group, then there’s no reason to catch up on them. Facebook doesn’t give me that much flexibility without jumping through some UI hoops, but, at least I can quickly hit the “Hide” button and never see posts from that person again.

Ultimately, it’s the mobile interface that helps to keep me up to date. And with both Facebook and Google+ I can quickly get the list of updates that matter most to me. I can’t do that with Twitter and, therefore, it eventually becomes too much to keep up with, so I just start reading back at the top.

Also, one more interesting note is how much Circles have changed things for me. On Twitter, everything I write is Public. Which leaves me frightened to post anything too off the cuff for fear that it’ll come back to haunt me with such permanence. On Facebook, everything is “Friends Only” because it’s too hard to switch back and forth. Google+ is the only service where I have a nice mix of content going “Public”, “Extended Circles”, “Circles” and even individual circles for more “security”. It’s true that nothing on the web is “private” and I don’t expect it to be. But keeping some things out of the eyes of a would-be employer/client/future-father-in-law armed with Google Search is a good thing.

Find me on Google+, Twitter, and Facebook.

I like saving the planet. I prefer email to snail mail. The only way it could be any better is if I could force EVERYONE to send me email so I’d never have to check my postal mailbox again.

But, there is one part about the paper bill that I miss. When I get a paper bill, I open it and everything I need to know is right there in front of me. I don’t need to look up passwords or account numbers or payment amounts. I open the bill, I pay the bill, I throw the bill away. It’s that simple.

With paperless billing, it’s hit or miss. Some companies provide all of the information on the paper bill in the emailed bill. I love these companies, but they are few and far between. Chase is the worst of all. First, they provide NO information about anything other than the last 4 digits of the account number that the bill is for. Secondly, their online site will not show you  your account number and they won’t give it to you on the phone. So you have to either go into a branch office or turn paper billing back on.

I’d like three options when it comes to billing (well, really, I only want one, but, I offer the other two for people who like complicated lives): 1. Paper Billing; 2. Paperless billing requiring a click and a login; 3. Clickless, Paperless billing with all the information from the paper bill present in it. If my email account isn’t secure, that’s my own problem. It’s not like the postal service is at all secure.

Regardless, here it is, with yet a new home. If you have any trouble with the site, let me know, please.

In the beginning, there was the desktop, and it was good. Then came Laptops and Notebooks. At first, these were luxury items owned only by enthusiasts and business travelers. In almost every case, the user had a more powerful more useful Desktop at the home or office that they relied on as well. Over time, Laptops became more prolific.

Instead of Laptops augmenting the Desktop experience, eventually, the “Desktop Replacement” Laptop was created and highly sought after. In 2008, Laptop sales were greater than Desktop sales, and now there is no looking back. Only the power users and businesses remain as Desktop customers, and even those markets are starting to dwindle.

Part of this shift is due to the increase in available power at an affordable price in mobile computing platforms. Laptops could do more than they could in previous years and offered portability, many consumers were left wondering what they needed a desktop for at all. However, many Desktop users would have happily continued using both if they had an easy, built-in, fool-proof way to ensure that the media, documents, and settings they needed would be there regardless if they were using their Desktop or Laptop. But even today, 3 years after the scales tipped, this is not simple. Documents are getting easier, though not without added monthly fees that not every user is willing to pay. But media and settings are still a long way off.

Now Smartphones and Tablets are knocking on the Laptops front door. Netbooks blur the line a bit, but not for long. The newest versions of Microsoft Windows and Mac OSx are “touch ready”. Tablets and Smartphones are getting more and more powerful and more and more capable. Some analysts predict that mobile internet users will surpass desktop internet users somewhere in the middle of 2013.

So, hardware manufacturer, how can you keep as many Laptop users as possible, encouraging them to maintain both devices instead of trying to replace their Laptop with their Tablets and Smartphones? Sync.

Sync needs to be offered to the user as soon as a new device is detected. The user needs the option for automated synchronization that does smart things like always provide a happy combination of the newest media and the most often used media. Seamless remote access to additional media is the best way to ensure that, even if automated Sync made the wrong choice, the user can still get the files they want. All of the new cloud services make this easier on developers than ever before but can also be expensive for the user. If external services cannot be made free in most cases, then a service on the desktop should fill the gap.

The bottom line is, get Syncing, or lose customers.

image by 27147

As we live a life of ease
Every one of us has all we need,
Sky of blue, and sea green,
In our yellow submarine!

I’m amazed at how many of my friends are interested in living together. It makes me believe that maybe the culture I’m looking for here in Dallas isn’t lost after all. I’ve seen an outpouring of ideas and offers from lots of people over the past week or so and it’s really helped me flesh this out a bit.

One of the most interesting offers was to share a home with a family in Austin. The family is already very dear to my heart and like-minded in terms of family and responsibility. And I long ago decided that Austin was an ideal city for me if I was going to stay in Texas. This seemed like a perfect situation.

But, the more I consider it the more I realize how much risk and difficulty there is involved with it. I’d have to take C away from her Mom. It’s only a few hours away and she’d still be able to see her almost as often as she’d like. But, it adds some complication. Factor in that I’d need to drop everything, move, look for a job, rent out my house, and leave everything I know and love here in DFW, it was just too much to do all at once. I still think this is ideal, and if I haven’t found what I’m looking for in Dallas within a few years, I’ll start looking out that way again. But for now, I think I have to let that go.

Another amazing offer I received was to share a home with a family in North Richland Hills. This place is beautiful! There’s lots of room! I’ve been friends (though not incredibly close friends) with half of the parental unit for over 10 years. I met the rest of the family and we all got along wonderfully. I’m still having conversations with them and working some bits out in my head.

But, as I see it now, there are a few limiting factors. Despite being a huge home, there are only 4 bedrooms. 3 of them are occupied by this family, so C and I would share a room. We do that now, so that’s okay. But as she gets older I’d prefer she share with another child. There’s nothing to say she couldn’t share with one of the other kids though. So that’s a wait-and-see kind of thing. The other limiting factor is that this house very much belongs to this family. I had envisioned a “our home” mentality and perhaps this would blossom into that as time progressed, but that isn’t the feel I got right away. So, another wait-and-see. The biggest limiting factor, though, is that, because after I move in all the rooms would be taken, it will be, at most, a two family home. Again, the family there said that there might be opportunity for more but wants to do it on a wait-and-see basis. So there’s a whole lot of wait-and-see.

I’m okay with wait-and-see. But I’d like to limit the disruptions to my daughter’s life as much as possible. With a move, a change in schooling/daycare, a whole new city, and the need to untie us from our current house, that’s a LOT to go with for so much wait-and-see. I’m still talking with them, and we’re going to have lots of sleep overs in the future, both to see where this goes and also because I’m excited to have met a friendly, open, like-minded family with an open-door policy so similar to my own.

So that leaves me with three options for now. I intend to pursue all three until one pans out.

I am going to keep looking for an existing home that I could share with another family. Ideally, there’d be room for at least three families but I’m flexible there for the right situation. Proximity to Irving, Denton, or Dallas is ideal, though not required. If you know of anyone that lives in a home with a room or two that they would spare and are interested in an intentional community of this nature, please let me know or send them my way.

I am going to think of ways to make my current home more suited to multi-family living and seek out families to share it with. I got an offer from a friend who would be willing to share my home. However, with her and her daughter here, that exhausts all of the “conventional” sleeping space my home has to offer (and that’s with our daughters sharing a room). The rooms in my house are large, however. So I’m looking for creative ways to split them into smaller spaces suitable for children as well adults who would consider even more open-minded living arrangements (like large rooms being shared by adults, etc). If you’re creative and budget-minded and would like to help me think of ways to split up this space let me know. If you would be open to “interesting” living arrangements with a very small financial obligation, contact me.

Finally, I’m looking to buy a home more suitable to what I want. Something large-ish with emphasis on the number of rooms not the size of them. Ideally in the Denton, Coppell, or Dallas (Oak Cliff, likely) areas. If you know of a home like this, or would be interested in helping to find one and share it, please let me know.

Image by James Booth

Have you ever heard Akon’s “Right Now”? WAIT! STOP! Don’t click that link! I don’t want to be responsible for what may happen afterward. I’m sure you’ve heard it. I’m quite far removed from the “cool guy” scene and I’ve heard it before now.

Maybe in the bathroom at that bootie-bumping club. Your “accidental” stop on the Top-40 station on your way across the dial. Standing outside the changing room waiting for your new fling to try on what must be the 40th pair of shoes. Through earbuds in an attempt to drown out the nagging about how fat and lazy you are that reminds you far too much of the last fling you had and this one isn’t even half as cute. You’ve heard it.

This song must be the worst song ever written. Ever.

I wanna make love right now now now.
Wish we never broke up right now now now.
We need to link up right now now now.

So why didn’t I just turn it off?

I started Couch to 5K (C25K, A program designed to take you from the Couch to running a 5K in 9 weeks) today. I had done it once before in December of 2008 but was abruptly halted due to (ah hell let’s use the oh-so-PC-term) Life Change Events. Unwilling to give myself any further cause for delay and working toward being a satisficier instead of a maximizer, I opted to let Pandora choose my music for me this time around. I’ve heard lots of warnings (no more ColdPlay!) about how inappropriate Pandora’s music selections can be. Trapping myself into them by starting a run and not wanting to stop to fiddle with music was probably not the best idea.

Don’t do this.

I picked one song that I thought was a good song to run to. Something with an upbeat tempo, uplifting lyrics, and not anything too heavy or thought provoking. I picked “I Gotta Feeling” by the Blackeyed Peas. Yeah, not the best song ever written, but it met my criteria and is apropos for my day considering I have a hot playdate tonight. (Yes, I used the words “hot” and “playdate” at the same time. Admit it, you’re jealous of me and my high-rollin’ life.)

I can’t lie
Watching everyday that goes by
‘Till I get you back I’m gon’ try
‘Cause you are the apple in my eye

Pandora spit out track after terrible track of the most boring, uninspired, uninteresting, nonsense music I have ever heard. Ok, that isn’t entirely true. It did break out with Journey’s “Don’t Stop Believin’” which was quite welcome considering what had come before it and what was to follow. But that was the one and only exception and it isn’t even remotely similar to the song I seeded it with. Among all of them, however, “Right Now” was the worst.

The run went well, though. Day 1 of Week 1 is meant to be easy. It wasn’t.

20 minutes of a 90 second walk followed by a 60 second run sandwiched in between two 5 minute walks to warm up and cool down. I traveled a little over 2 miles giving me a just under 15 minute mile. Pathetic I know, but it sure beats the running I did yesterday (“hey, I’m going run into the kitchen for another bowl of popcorn”). I can tell how far off I am from where I was last time by how many streets in my neighborhood I was able to cover. Before I could hit each of them once and a couple of them a second time. This time, I skipped an entire chunk. But it felt good, anyway. Okay, the very first running interval felt good. Even the second one did. The eight one sucked and I felt like my heart was about to rip itself out of my chest for a more suitable mate.

I want you to fly with me
I miss how you lie with me
I wish you could dine with me
The one that’ll grind with me

But still this song haunts me. You’ve heard it, right? The guy is basically saying, “I’m lonely and I want to have sex with you.” And he’s doing so in the worst possible way, over and over again. Any oversexed Junior High student with a Casio keyboard and Autotune could have made it.

Here, erase it from your mind. Instead, listen to a terrible Ukulele cover of “Right Now” that is, somehow, actually better than the original. What, that didn’t help?

Image By Sarah Bodri

For over two years I’ve been taking baby steps and big jumps toward simplifying my life. A couple of time I’ve touched on simplifying my diet as well, but have never really made a strong effort. That’s about to change.

The over all plan is to find myself eating mostly raw foods — vegetables, fruits, nuts, seeds, etc — as often as I feel the need to do so through out the day. Then to supplement that with 2-3 larger cooked meals per week. Anything that comes in a package (including cereal) will be removed from the house entirely with the exception of a few forms of easy to eat on-the-go type foods — wholesome granola bars, dried fruits, etc. Someday, I’d like to even make that stuff at home. But I’m getting ahead of myself.

So, my first little baby step is to deal with Lunch. It’s a good place to start because it hardly affects my daughter, will buy me some free time during the middle of the work day, and will drastically reduce one of the sore spots in my budget. So here’s the plan.

I will bring my lunch to work four days a week. It will consist of only raw foods or of leftovers from dinners that week. On the fifth day, I’m free to go out with a friend and I should do so without worry about cost, or time, or calories and just enjoy myself.

This little baby step should give me a good step toward weight loss and hunger detection and will also server as a good taste for which raw foods work well and how to prepare them for “on the go” consumption.

Wish me luck, or, better yet, join me and encourage me. Picnic lunch dates could be a lot of fun.

My vision of the Mini-Commune is between 2 and 5 families (depending on the size of those families and the size of the dwelling) sharing a single, larger house. Ideally, the house would have lots of smaller rooms to be used as bedrooms as well as several larger rooms to be used as communal living spaces. Certainly some properties will lend themselves better to this than others but, as long as it’s large enough, almost anything can be made to work.

The benefits of even the mini-commune are quite impressive.

First, there’s the sheer financial aspect of it all. Based on a house I’ve been able to find in the area and average expenses, with even 3 families living together the monthly cost would be around $575/family. When you factor in group meals (less eating out), bulk purchases, and reduced needs for travel, you save even more. Consider the fact that, under this arrangement, it might be possible to get rid of as many as half of the vehicles owned by the group, there’s even more savings. Once you bundle in the social aspects of always having a “family” of people around to lend a helping hand, to make tedious tasks more enjoyable, to provide comfort, and to encourage it, the cons seem entirely manageable.

The cons, of course, having to share a space with other people. If people are inconsiderate, rude, sloppy, or selfish, sharing a space with them can be difficult if not impossible. Obviously, this would require appropriately minded people. I think it’s very important to select fellow commune (or mini-commune) members based on their nature and their lifestyle and how close to your own that those things are more so than how well your interests mesh with theirs or how close of friends you may be now. As you get deeper into the communal unit, more cons can arise, like not having certain amenities (cars, showers, etc) available to you the very second that you want them. It is very much about personal sacrifice in order to increase the benefits for all, including yourself. However, in an ideal commune, these issues will be worked out as a matter of routine. In the fully fledged commune, one could alter the dwelling to more closely match the needs of those that lived there. In this mini-commune one would have to be willing to adapt to what was available.

The fully fledged commune would, of course, be able to grow vegetables, raise a garden, and contribute space to the greater community as well. These things would only be possible in much smaller doses in a mini-commune.

I haven’t fully fleshed out where I’d like to live. But, my tentative selections are Denton, Coppell, Western Dallas (as long as we have home schoolers), and “The Sticks”. If you’re interested — truly interested — in joining let me know. And, if you have any advice (other than, simply, “COMMUNES SUCK”) I’d love to hear it.

Here are a few things to consider as you make the decision.

Having a NON-interchangeable lens means you have less to worry about dust, about losing parts, and about being ready for the moment. This is a good thing.

And a huge downside to the DSLR (and there fore, a plus to the point-and-shoot) is that they are bigger and heavier. Do not underestimate this. The bigger and heavier a camera is the less likely you are to bring it. And the camera you bring is the camera you use. And any photo is better than no photo at all.

However, unless you’re paying THOUSANDS for your non-SLR camera (which you can do and get the best of both worlds in some ways) then you’re also getting a much smaller sensor. This equates to more noise, less quality, and a greater difficulty in those cool tricks like making the background out of focus, capturing fireworks, and working in really low light.

For, kids, especially young kids, nothing beats the speed of a DSLR. The point and shoots get close… really close… but they are not quite there. For macro photography and photos of flowers, the point-and-shoots have an edge due to the mechanics of the small lenses and small sensors.

In reality, I have one of each (and two more for good measure and I’m not even kidding). Based purely on the average person, I’d have to say the top-notch point and shoot may be the best option. One of the Panasonic travel zooms (like the Panasonic Lumix DMC-ZS5/TZ8), or the beautiful new Canon G11 (or even the Canon S50 if you swing that way). These cameras are all smart, and fun, and fast, and take beautiful photos and all cost the same if not less than a DSLR would.

But, if you want that extra oomph in quality and speed, and really don’t mind the extra weight and size, go for a bottom of the line DSLR. I shoot Nikon, but, truly, Canon is just as good. As long as you have something in the 30-50mm range for a lens, the kids photography will be covered. If you travel or hike a lot you might want 18-200mm range.

There are a few tasks that one camera style is more suited to than another. If you want to mess with studio lighting and dedicated flashes go for the DSLR (and shell out the moolah for the lights). If you want to shoot sporting events, go for the DSLR (and shell out the cash for a big, long lens). If you want to do long, artsy, night time photos, go for the DSLR (and throw down some dough for a wider aperture). If you’re into macro photography, go for the point and shoot. It really is the cheapest easiest way to get that job done. If you want to take the camera to the beach, underwater, or on hiking trips in questionable weather, go for the point-and-shoot since the waterproof housings are cheaper.

“Pretend you live for a living.”

–Buddy Wakefield

Flickr’s Navel Gazing Society (otherwise known as Explore) is certainly no measure of greatness. Neither that of a photograph, nor that of the life of a photographer. But accepting it as an indicator I present the following:

I had 46 photos hit explore from 4/5/2005 until 11/23/2007.  That’s 18 per year.

My daughter was born in 12/2007.

I had 14 photos hit explore from 11/23/2207 until 12/13/2008. That’s 13 per year. A pretty steep drop from before, but still one a month. A baby does that to you and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

My wife left in 01/2009. After a few months of depression I was left refreshed, ready to take on the world, and with a young child under my care for roughly 75% of my previously “free” time.

I had 0 photos hit explore from 12/13/2008 until now. That’s 0 per year.

Again, I’m not complaining. I’m just trying to work it out in my head.

You see, the thing is, I’m very efficient, yet terrible at multi-tasking. Let me do one thing at a time and I’ll do it quickly and very well. Make me do two things at once and I’ll more than likely fail at both of them. Caring for a child takes at least some portion of my attention almost all of the time.

I don’t have time to take the photos I used to. It’s not that I don’t have time to hold a camera point it at things and release the shutter. Many would argue that a child makes a beautiful interesting photographic subject. And, despite always carrying far too many things, keeping a camera (or three) on me at all times is something I’m quite good at. I take plenty of photos. But photography is about more than just pressing a button. It’s about seeking out the light. It’s about waiting for the perfect moment. Looking for light and waiting for a photo are two things incredibly hard to do with a young child. They don’t like to sit still. And, doing so while watching a child is multi-tasking. So, I’m terrible at it.

I also don’t have time to edit. Editing photos is a two part process. First, we throw away the junk. Then, we make the good stuff look better. This takes time. Lots of it. Sitting in front of a computer isn’t something a young child enjoys, unless they enjoy it so much that they want to help, at which point, you’re not getting the job done at all. The good news is, I can do this when she’s asleep. The bad news is, that’s the only time I have to do lots of other things as well.

Finally, I don’t have time to promote. I used to spend a lot of time viewing photos, commenting on photos, discussing photos, and sharing photos. I have all but stopped doing any of these things.

So, now to the important part. How can I get back some of what I had without losing the wonderful things I have now? Because I can’t multi-task, I have to find ways to make what I do more efficient and to find ways to allow me to juggle tasks better.

Of course, just because you’re not me or not in this same situation doesn’t mean that these tips won’t make you more efficient too.

1) Take fewer photos

With film, releasing the shutter on your camera was a commitment to spending both time and money in order to actually see the image. Photographers acknowledged this and very few were willing to release the shutter until they were sure they had it right. When digital came along the mentality shifted: it’s just digital. Click away! Sort them out later!

In theory, if you’re looking for a certain shot taking as many as possible helps ensure you get the right one. In practice, if one of them is terrible, the rest probably will be too. Multiple shots approaching with different ideas and at multiple angles is one thing and certainly a good idea. But taking photographs just in case they might be good amounts to nothing but waste.

By spending more time looking and less time clicking, I might be more likely to anticipate a shot. And having fewer photos will drastically reduce the amount of time I spend in Phase 1 of editing, and somewhat reduce the time I spend in Phase 2.

2) Bring a Photo Friend

Bringing along a photographically inclined friend, particularly one with similar distractions (i.e. children, in my case) leaves us both with the ability to explore an idea more closely. As something strikes me as worthy of further examination, being able to trust my child in the other person’s hands as I explore an idea more fully will let me free my mind completely for the task. And my friend gets the same benefit. Additionally, as children often become the subjects of photographs, it allows one of us to photograph while the other helps adjust and collect the children.

3) Involve the Children

This is only a small break, but every little bit counts. But sending the children seeking for the elements you’re looking for in your photo, their minds focus a bit more and it makes them easier to monitor. Kids are great at looking for shadows, sticks, flowers, trees, letters, numbers, and things like this. Just don’t ask them to look for soft lighting on the side of a fire hydrant with minimal background distraction. Or, at least wait until they are 12 or so.

Involving them in the 1st phase of editing (and parts of the 2nd phase as well) is also a good idea. You’ll need software that allows you to rate photos quickly and with at least 3 or 4 different levels of rating (junk, keep for fun/memories, good, awesome). With this in place, children love to look at photos from an adventure they just took. Especially if there are photos of people and things they recognize. Making a habit out of unloading a photo card in the same way we unload our backpacks after an adventure will bring a child to anticipate doing so.

4) Involve Friends for Promotion

Nothing makes me want to photograph MORE than knowing that my work is enjoyed and appreciated. Promotion allows this to be fully realized. Friends can be a fantastic resource for promotion. Between Facebook, Twitter, Tumblr, Buzz, Blogs, and Email your friends can quickly and easily help get the word out about how wonderful a certain photos of yours is. Take the time to share with your friends and ask them to do the promotion for you.

And, if you are the friend of a photographer *cough, ahem, ME!*, share their work. Expose their art. Most social media outlets have icons you can drag to your browser toolbar to make sharing as simple as clicking a button. Here are some for Facebook, Twitter, Google Buzz, and Tumblr.

I hope this helps you with your photography. Do you have any other ideas to share that can help get better photos with a partially distracted mind?

As much as I enjoy cooking, love making extravagant meals and trying new techniques, the time it takes to do so is not worth what I’d have to give up to get it. So this means I either make very quick meals, eat raw foods, find people to share the cooking burden with, or hire the job out and eat at restaurants.

A month or two ago I finally broke down and paid someone to pull my weeds, trim my bushes, lay down landscapers cloth, and put down mulch. I was just tired of the letters from my HOA and they were claiming they were going to pay someone to do it and bill me and I was afraid of what they were going to cost. So now, my flower beds look beautiful.

But my yard still looks terrible. And my HOA has started sending notes about that. My grass is not really grass. It’s mostly weeds — low weeds mind you — with grass in between. As evidenced by the vacant lots in my neighborhood, it’s simply the nature of things around here. Without direct supervision and control, the weeds grow and the grass doesn’t.

So I’m supposed to go buy some “weed and feed” product, lock my kid inside the house because she certainly can’t be around that stuff, and spend a couple of days not enjoying her and, instead, following some intricate and arcane pattern of water then feed then water then rain dance. Then I can’t let my kid outside for at least two or three days as I wait for that stuff to go away. The alternative, as I did with the flowerbeds, is to hire the job out. For $50-70 a month, someone trained to do so will apply a steady stream of life threatening chemicals to my lawn to ensure that it grows green and “Natural”.

I get around to cleaning baseboards and fans every couple of months. Storage closets and such can go a whole year without being rearranged. I get to the toilets and bathroom counters once a week or so. The daily use surfaces like the kitchen counters and such get cleaned as soon as they are used in order to maintain a livable space. But, if you stick your hand in my couch cushions, to be honest, I have no idea what you’ll find. If you take out the white glove and start wiping surfaces, well, you may as well buy those things in bulk. I try to teach my daughter about housework by including her in it. But spending hours and hours toiling with a toothbrush at bathroom tile grout just doesn’t make any sense. Not when that means my kid is going to have to spend that time alone. For $400 a month, there are at least 10 different cleaning services that are more than willing to do the job for me.

Throw in the pest control service, the lawn guy, and some landscapers and, for $650 a month, I too could have a home kept up to societies standards. Assuming a salary of $40k a year, that means I only need to work 8 more hours every week to afford it. Well, aside from the eating thing. And an interior decorator. And a shopping assistant. And a wardrobe coordinator. And a crafts specialist.

So my options are to hire all of this stuff out and work my butt off to pay for it, force my child to play alone for a large portion of the time we have each day while I perform these tasks myself, or just not do them at all.

Currently I’m choosing some combination of the last two. I try to spend 30-60 minutes each day cleaning with my daughter’s help. This is, of course, above and beyond the basic pick up and cleaning and laundry and such. And I try to spend another 30-60 minutes cleaning on my own before she wakes up in the morning. This works well for all the small jobs. But for anything that needs more than 30-60 minutes of my time, it just doesn’t get done.

The right way!

So I’m trying to find new ways to do things that allow me to tackle the big jobs in small pieces.

I’m trying to find non-dangerous, child-friendly ways of, fertilizing the lawn, killing weeds, and cleaning hard water deposits out of the shower.

I try to decorate the house in ways that don’t require renovation or lengthy installation efforts. And when something does require some additional time, I try to find people to help.

I’m trying to find people to share meals with. Ideally on a semi-planned schedule. This saves the cost of restaurants and either lets someone else do the cooking or brings someone else around to keep my daughter from being alone as I do the cooking or some combination of the two.

And maybe some day I’ll make so much money that I’ll laugh at myself for ever wondering why people tried to do this stuff themselves.

Whether you’re a single person without kids, a single parent, a double income family, or a stay at home parent with an active lifestyle — if you’ve got any ideas, tips, secrets, or magic tricks about how you get things done, I’d love to hear them.

First, let’s point out the only OS to get it right: iPhone. Right out of the box iPhone displays your contact’s photo beautiful with no additional software required. It crops, resizes, scales, and gives you the best looking photo possible displayed very largely on the iPhone’s display.

Android tries. But it has quite a few issues. First of all, it only uses about 1/4 of the screen’s display to show the photo. Since there’s nothing useful on almost all of the remaining 3/4 of the display, why not fill the screen? Even worse, however, is when you activate your contacts for Google Sync. You see, almost everyone activates their contacts for Google Sync, because it’s easy and awesome. Except for when it comes to Photo Caller ID. You see the phone saves a nice large image to use for the Photo Caller ID. Even lets you crop it square yourself to decide what to show. Then your phone Syncs with Google. Well, Google only supports a 96×96 pixel image for a contact photo. So, when the sync is finished, that’s all you’re left with on your phone. The end result is that Android does the best it can to scale a puny little 96×96 pixel image up to fit the space reserved for contact photo display. You get a nasty looking, pixelated photo that barely resembles your contact at all.

Windows Mobile requires a 3rd party app to get this right. At least, however, once you have it it works well enough. Of course Windows Mobile is dead, so who cares.

Symbian Series 60 requires a 3rd party app as well. Lame.

When it comes to non smart phones, Nokia’s Series 40 is king. The phone does a pretty good job of displaying the photo in as much space as it can acquire. However, it doesn’t maintain aspect ratio, doesn’t give you the option to crop, and really only displays a chunk out of the center of the photo due to other onscreen display items being present. I’ve yet to find a template that shows exactly what size the image should be and which parts of it are completely obscured by onscreen text.

Can all the handset OS developers all just sit down and fix this problem already? And if someone has a template for Series 40 phones, can you send it my way so I don’t have to send myself 100 photos to reverse engineer it?

Child: What’s that?

You: An Apple.

Child: What’s that?

You: A Knife.

Child: What are you doing?

You: Cutting the apple with the knife.

*30 seconds goes by*

Child: What’s that?

You: AN APPLE!

If you’ve EVER been around any children under the age of 5 then you’ve, no doubt, witnessed or been a part of a conversation just like this one. Despite knowing exactly what you’re doing, what you’re doing it to, and why you’re doing it in the first place, they ask you about it. Maybe you’ve been around the block a few times and you’ve learned to roll with it. Or maybe it drives you further up the wall of insanity with each passing day. Either way, it makes one wonder, why do children do this?

The answer, much like the answer to most of the things kids under age 5 do, is simple: they are imitating you. As a species, human beings learn by watching and imitating. This is why kids like to put on yours shoes, eat what you’re eating, drink what you’re drinking, watch what you’re watching, do what you’re doing, and play with whatever thing you happen to have in your hands.

I know you are probably thinking, “but my kid has never seen me question someone else like that! Why would I ask someone a question I already know the answer to?!”. But consider, carefully, the fact that your child is a “someone else” too.

Imagine your kid is playing with blocks in the middle of the living room floor. It’s quiet, you’ve been doing some chore, you’ve just finished, and you want to interact with him. “What are you playing with?” Blocks. “What are you building?” A Tower. “What color is that block?” Green. “How many fingers do I have up?” Three. “What color is your shirt?” Purple. “What’s this a picture of?” A Caterpillar. “How do you say Hat in French?” Chapeau.

Ah ha! You knew the answer to every single one of those questions, didn’t you? Well, close enough. The reason why you asked them and whether or not you should is another topic altogether. But at least now you realize that it isn’t the genetic predisposition of our children to annoy us to death that causes them to ask such questions. They are asking because they’ve learned that this is what people do. And they’ve learned this because that’s how you act toward them.