solitary wolf

goodbye?

2010-03-23T01:22:00.001+08:00

this blog is getting so friggin' emo. bored of it. let's see if i can pull off any happier posts at tumblr instead. get link from me <3

=O quite true!

2010-03-19T12:56:00.006+08:00

1月20日自由奔放

1月20日出生的人，喜欢凭着一时的冲动行事，因此他们的人生也显得激烈无比。他们会突然下决定，然后就照着这个决定采取行动，这种作风几乎已成为他们个性的特征了。在生活态度上，他们也是即兴式的，从不事先做任何谨慎的规划，也因为如此，他们反而能够接受生命中发生的任何事情，不管情况多么地混乱或令人沮丧，他们都觉得是可以处理的事。事实上，他们的内心经常也都是处于混沌状态，但神奇的是，他们竟然能够在工作上理出一点秩序来。当然，这也许是因为工作本身在技术层面上比较容易整理出头绪来吧！
这天出生的人总是活力充沛，有首过人的幽默感，即使在最艰难的善下，也能运用一些小机智，让事情变得不那么严重。事实上，也正是这种苦中作乐的态度，使他们能够维持对事物的深度敏感。虽然他们喜欢开玩笑，甚至在合适的时机扮演小丑自娱娱人，但是，强烈的自尊心也会逼迫他们确实认真地看待自己。

他们非常人性化，所以往往也深受家人和朋友的喜爱。尽管有时候他们也会发发脾气，或是说话不留情面，但是通常很快就会获得原谅，因为他们多半都没什么恶意。这些人平常老爱嘻嘻哈哈的，所以，除了真正熟悉的人以外，别人可能会觉得他们很肤浅。事实上，这天出生的人很保护自己的私生活，只会和少数亲近的人分享内心的希望和梦想。他们大多极为博爱，与别人分享任何东西都是二话不说。不过，他们一旦发现这些对象其实并不值得与之分享时，就会有被骗的感觉。

虽然这天出生的人健康情形不见得永远不出状况，但大致说来，他们的身体、情绪和精神状态，通常都非常地稳定，能够帮助他们度过生命中的许多难关。不知道为什么，这些人总是能带着那种无可救药的乐观，一路平安地走过各种困境。除此之外，他们通常都会同情弱者，也有很强烈的保护心、怜悯心，不过这种保护欲却很可能使他们变得独裁，以致不太适合他们。理由是，他们并不特别擅长逼迫别人（包括他们的孩子）去遵守自己订下的规矩；再者，他们天性中的自由奔放似乎就是不理会任何限制的，所以别人通常也不会认真地看待他们的权威。

总而言之，1月20日出生的人心胸宽大、情绪化、善表达，而且非常关心别人。当然他们也会有明显的缺点、也会做出错误的判断，但不管怎么样，绝对都是没有恶意的。同时，他们对生活所保持的乐观态度，以及坚持到底的勇气，都是非常值得学习的地方。

行动之前先看清状况。让别人有机会表达意见，不要贸然不断语。学习更有耐心。别过分要求别人注意你。

优点

善于表达、弹性大、慷慨。

缺点

浑沌、不切实际、容易心烦意乱。

Sorry for hacking your blog.

2010-03-11T21:43:00.004+08:00

Hi everyone. I'm an uninvited guest blogger from outer place called Poodlephinus. With my psychic powers i got her blog password and email. Before anyone starts throwing rotten dog bones and Cesar at me, i'm here with a very important message to my beloved She Hui.

I know i made a confession to you yesterday but you rejected it and shattered my heart into a million pieces. I had to spend the next 24 hours fixing my heart back so that i can write this here for you. So right here, i'm gonna pluck up my courage and make the boldest confession i ever did in my entire life. Your underwear has a hole. Please mend it.

ok joke. I think its hard to describe the thrillion and one emotions i'm feeling whenever i start to think of things and my life. But there's this very nudging urge for me to express my gratitude i feel for you over this short period of 2 years. I've not know you for a really long time, i do not dare to say i completely understand you, and i'm sorry for blaming you at times. But what you've did for me the past 2 years, i'm really filled with gratitude and thanks because you've done things that not any other ordinary friends could have done for me.

Thank you for being by my side everytime i needed you. Thank you for offering me warmth and comfort. Thank you for giving me strength and hope. Thank you for putting up with all my nonsense and horrid temper. Thank you for always looking after me. One thing i know, my life will not be complete without you even though it already sucks now.

If anytime you need me, someone to talk, crap or cry PLEASE LOOK FOR ME FOR I'LLL BE THERE. Sweetie 162bpm.

MUA MUA MUA LOVE U !!!!

Don't know why...

2010-03-09T01:24:00.002+08:00

but I should have known from the start that everyone is different in the way they perceive and act.

Am I doing too much? I wonder sometimes.

It's getting too confusing, and I don't know where to draw the line. I can only give it my all for all the special people in my life, but there is no such thing as reciprocating give and take. I'm getting disillusioned with all the things in life. I try to give strength to others, but who is willing to empower me? It's not even like my friends are not there for me. I don't know what is wrong with me =.=

At the end of the day, I'm still the one that's isolating myself away from others. I hate this feeling. I am truly, sincerely happy for others, but I just can't find inner peace within myself.

My conclusion? I'm just impossible to deal with. Shoot me. I fuckin' hate being emo. RAWR.

im a trashcan

2010-03-04T22:17:00.004+08:00

ya, vent all your unhappiness on me. I can take anything.

OR SO YOU THINK

why oh why must you be so similar. irl, you like to disturb other people, crack lame jokes, are fun-loving...... until we enter the virtual world. all the hurtful attitude and hurtful things you did to me were all online. you're not the only ones who hate to be ignored, much less treated in this way. did I really do anything so loathing to warrant such behaviour from you? if that's the case, then just stab me.

omgwtfbbq

2010-03-03T01:32:00.001+08:00

I'm still in holiday mood and I have an annotated bibliography to do before going to bed.... gg-ed ttm. hate school as usual...

new blogskin~

2010-03-02T17:51:00.004+08:00

Finally got around to moving my ass and getting a new blogskin in place.

Not my usual style, but it's cute >w<

And the bulk of my previous skins were always very *cough* dark/emo *cough* if not bright.

But I really liked my previous one, I think I'm starting to miss it already ;___;

awwwww

2010-03-02T12:20:00.008+08:00

Time to chop off my head TT__TT cos he really did bother to keep track >__> LUCKILY HE DIDN'T LINK IT TO MY MSN NICK. Stalker sayang, don't tell okay? ;make

Been building up on my sleep debt lately (5 hours of sleep in 3 days? LOL) , and trying very hard to forget you, trying very hard not to get upset over all those things. And... missing Pengxiao. *sigh*

I don't wanna say too much about those kinds of things to you anymore, because firstly, you will never listen to what I have to say, and secondly because I don't wanna risk things between us anymore. Haven't we both been hurt enough already? Even if you think that I have to neglect you, so be it, I would rather only talk happy things with you rather than triggering sadness from any one of us.

Okay slap myself for being emo. I'm happy happy in DC-Squad! All hail gaming! Jubeat love love love! (I should take vids/pics of Tianjiji playing it A__A) Bishi Bashi love love! Scandals love love love! Brown Eyed Girls saranghaeyo~ Hee hee.

It's good that my mind is being occupied by other people now, it helps me to forget you and how you only saw me as a tool of convenience. But I will still give you my well wishes. I won't be your toy no more. (:

BTW yesterday was our wedding one month anni. A bit lame since the day before was our 'real-fake' one month.... but it was nice playing together. Sorry Tianjiji and Bala for eating so slowly and making you all rot with me for so long TT__TT Scandal won't see this (cos I like ranting on a dead blog that means bala and tianjiji won't see this too BUT whatever) but I LOVE YOU TOO <3~

2010-02-28T18:19:00.001+08:00

Even though you won't remember......

Happy one month anniversary dear. ^__^

2010-02-14T05:42:00.000+08:00

Am I the only one who is crying my guts out? To cry so hard, until my view is blinded by my tears, until I lose my voice to even cry out, until my head feels like it's splitting into two?

You want breathing space. You want time. I've said all that I can but you still decided to push me away, again.

You say you do not want to hurt me, but you are killing me right here, right now. You are my friend, but you want to give up now.

And you were never and will never be pathetic in my heart. Stop degrading and insulting my love for you because I love you more than you can possibly imagine. I mean every single word of it.

I do not and I will not accept what you have said. I will give you time and space. But don't ever forget that you have someone here who loves you this much. 知道吗，斑斑？我等你，快点回来。

JIJI JIJI BABY BABY BABE

2010-02-08T12:05:00.003+08:00

给我亲爱的朋友--斑斑：

真的很对不起，让你担心了。我老实招了吧，我最近的确少和你说话了。我也很想念你，对过去念念不忘。我一向来都很自私，我知道。你们有事的时候，我总是想安慰你们，可是我自己却常常一个人躲起来不和你们分享我的心事。对不起，我不是一个好朋友。

最近发生了好多令人悲伤的事情，我想，我们大家没有谁比谁好过得了多少。大家都受了伤，大家都很难过，大家都有遗憾。身为朋友，我应该让你好好振作，往未来前进。刚开始我还可以这样劝着你，可是后来我却动摇了。我输给了自己的私心，我不想你也放弃，因为我好想念我们3个人在一起的日子。你们两个对我都是那么地重要，我心里老是奢望着会有挽回的余地。或许以后还有这种可能，可是这不过是我心中的期望，不该让任何人抱着没有肯定的希望这样走下去，不是么？

那天，我和 phi 有了一点小摩擦，一个人默默地哭泣着，我好想好想跟你说话，尤其是你在msn上跟我说话，真的忍不住想在电话上对你哭诉，但我在赶作业，作业还是一边哭一边打的。没多久 phi 就跑来和我谈了，我们很快就和好了。人与人的相处，我想就是要双方懂得哪里该让，哪里该坚持，哪里该无条件接受。这些都不容易做到，可是我会努力成为你们可以依赖一辈子的朋友。

一直想好好陪着你，其实我自己也好难受，不懂得怎么让你们开心，看到你和其他人变亲密了，自己心里也不舒服。在 audi 加入了新的 fam，心里也有很多不安，因为我并不擅长和人们相处，顶多是到处开开小玩笑，却无法好好地与他人交心。以前你说，我是你们感情的支柱，可是我却不够坚强，无法好好同时间守护你们两个。我讨厌看到你们受到伤痛，却没有办法保护你们，让我真的很自责。

对不起，朋友，也谢谢你还肯接受这样子的我。说我想太多也好，说我感情用事也罢，你们对我就是那么地重要。反正我就是那么啰嗦啦，打了一堆五四三的出来，说来说去也是我不对。总之就是我也好爱你啦！还有我的darling halfy 也爱，hehehehehehe. ^__^

fuck it

2010-02-04T23:08:00.004+08:00

yea, that's right, fuck it.

I hate to be all emo and shit, but it still happened. Although you all probably wouldn't even care, because you all are stuck in your own emotions as well.

I hate it. I miss the days of jiphigon, missed the times we had together. Even though I was always the odd one out, even though your quarrels and squabbles filled my days with worry and hurt, I've never felt as bad as now.

Before knowing what you thought about me, I probably wouldn't have felt this way. I would have persisted with what I was normally doing. I had my doubts and you dispersed them, and it is only now that I know all that was a hoax.

And you know what? I'm not some superhuman. I have my own share of feelings and thoughts. I try my best to be there for all my loved ones but all I get in return are hurt, distrust. When people are unhappy, I get vented on. I get ignored. I get lashed at. I even get hated. LOL

And you know what? I get affected by all of your emotions too. So what if I have never engaged in a romantic relationship before. So what if I always end up being used by people who matter to me. I try my very best to put myself in your shoes and my efforts never get appreciated.

I fucking hate being this emo. Because I fucking hate to see important friends sad. But what can I do? Nothing I do is right. I am irritating, I am sticky, I stalk people and deny them of their freedom. I am too frank for my own good. I ask too many questions, I am just a redundant presence. And has it ever occurred to you why I am doing this? Because I CARE and LOVE you. I cannot bring myself to leave those I love behind, alone, unhappy. IS THAT WRONG?

HAVE ANYONE TRIED PUTTING THEMSELVES IN MY SHOES? When stuff happen, YOU ARE NOT THE ONLY ONES TO GET HURT. I try to console others, be there for others. But who is there to heal the wounds in my heart. And why the fuck am I shedding tears over this. It's not like I matter to anyone of you. You all are forever surrounded by so many other people who are willing to give their hearts out for you. I am one of the many, but the most "irritating" one of all. So, I guess it's just perfectly natural and reasonable that I am always being treated with disdain? Hahahahaha.

WOULDN'T IT BE FASTER IF YOU JUST STABBED ME TO DEATH? SPARE ME THE PAIN, PLEASE.

And you know what the best part is? You all will never ever care enough to even see this. LOL.

Welcome 2010!

2010-01-01T03:53:00.000+08:00

It feels like just days ago where we last attempted a new year's countdown at Renny's place last year -- but this year we actually succeeded in staying beyond 12!!

I've been busy working (end of the month's a crazy period as well as the beginning of every month >_>;) and although this year's countdown was hurriedly planned, I thought it went really well! :D

Okay on to pictures >w<

First picture of the night -- cute lil fellas all over Bekah's bed. Didn't catch the piglet on this photo, wasted. Pfffffft.

Not that I am a Coca Cola fan, but I do like this tin box :D Contained flavoured lipsticks, Mich's gifts to us from the US~

Also a gift: postcards from Grand Canyon. 'Tis pretty <3

Potluck vegetarian style!! <3

Everything was so yummy! (Including the veggie skewers although the carrots were hard - but jc and I loved the broccoli)

As Bekah aptly said on Facebook: Ber is ALWAYS ready for a photo, anytime, anywhere!

Tried to block the "SHERMAINE" behind us with little success, so it looks like we were there to celebrate her birthday. Ahahahahaha!

Oh and Bekah entertained us to the max when she kept dropping her tomatoes all over the place. Fail la wei!!!

Okay la fine la she did manage to eat it tidily (but excruciatingly slowly) in the end. Ohohohohoho

After dinner, jetlagger Mich went for a nap and we UNO-ed!

Xian had so many cards her hands were sore from holding them up =x

可愛いですね～

Act-cute! Bekah asked you to look sad but you ended up smiling 1 sec later! =x

Like mother, like daughter. 母女都没脸见人after losing to a primary school kid TT^TT

HAHAHAHAHAHA @ BEKAH'S FAILED ATTEMPT

Indian poker!! <3

And the final, complete family portrait. First was Pooh, then Piglet, then Eeyore, and finally Heffalump + Tigger ^__^

Thank you so much for the golden night, girls, I feel so at ease talking all about my 大道理 and other crap because I know most other people wouldn't even bother listening to what I have to say. You all allow me to laugh from the bottom of my heart and our friendship means the world to me. We've been through another year together and there will be countless more to come. Love you all and may you all have a smashin' year ahead. Mooooacks <3

And since this post sums up the crossing over to the new year, I shall spam the other photos that I'd been lazy to post up over the past few months =x

Random baby pictures =x She's SOOO cute! BTH BTH!!! >w<

Studying at SMU with Bekah and JC -- highlight of the day being Bekah showcasing her amazing map-drawing skills. HAHAHAHA

AMAZING, right? (okay la it's not THAT exaggerated.... BUT.... it was funny all the same. HAHAHAHAHAHA)

After the exams - Dinner with Ling and JC at AMK Hub's New York New York -- I've always been "paiseh" about asking for the cotton candy but the first thing Ling Yi did after entering the restaurant was to ask for it for all of us! *Thumbs up at Ling Ling* WAHAHAHAHA >:D

Their soup in a bowl rocks cos the bread was sooo good!

And this happened to Ling's family van that same night -- due to the horrible positioning of metal bars (ridiculously positioned, I must say) =.=

Ling drove me home that night and I kept wondering what the cars behind us thought about this huge, gaping hole:

It was funny in a morbid sort of way but we've learnt a lesson: AMK HUB carpark sucks! They placed warning signs near the metal poles (since they were jutting out from the walls) BUT they did not place any lights near the signs. =.= *clap clap* all hail the stupidity of the management =.=

Next lot of random pictures: my new bedsheet set! Chickens >w<

All hail Jiji!

Next: a wonderful restaurant my sis recommended to me. It's a Japanese style Italian restaurant at Liang Court. OMG the food is cheap, good and fresh! (Non-processed AND fresh A__A)

To-die-for Panna Cotta <3

And finally last picture taken in 2009: Cute candies my boss bought for my sister and I from her Sydney trip (:

That's it for pictures! Reflections post will have to wait until after I get my rest! xD

Happy New Year all~

this post contains unorganized, general rant + random trash

2009-12-25T00:48:00.008+08:00

Too much emotions being bottled up... And as I type this post out I still have no idea how to organize my thoughts into proper sentences...

I'm tired. Not just physically tired (seeing I'm the only one I know working/studying (jap) every day of my "holiday"...) but also mentally tired. I've mentioned it before, our words are powerful, powerful things. A passing comment one makes, be it in sadness or anger, may be the very thing that hurts one's loved ones to extreme points. Perfect example. "You're the only one who..." Blah blah blah. Such sweeping statements have never been favoured by me. In my opinion, by saying something as forcefully absolute as this, you are denying everything that every other person had done. It may be something small to you, but certainly not to me. Because now, I know that no matter what hurtful things your "you" did, nothing will change. No matter what I do.... well, apparently it doesn't credit me enough in your heart to make you feel that more than that one person actually matters to you.

I'm tired. I'm tired of being forgotten, neglected, unappreciated. It is the season of giving, but I feel more empty than ever. Because every single time I go all out and give everything I have to offer, I'm ignored, not taken seriously, and before long I'm back into the whole cycle of being treated like trash all over again. I'm tired of being the one who gets all the shit, I'm tired of always being the last to know, I'm tired of constantly having to find things out for myself and then pretending to be some irritating bitch who has nothing better to do than to poke my butt into other people's businesses. I'm tired of forcing things out of people as if I'm some gossipy slut, I'm tired of preaching to deaf ears. I'm tired of being there for everyone but having nobody there for me. I'm tired of being myself in front of the people I love. I'm tired of myself.

Because at the end of the day, these are the things that I must do, and no matter how terrible I feel about it, I will still go about doing those things. What is the point of complaining, then? I honestly do not know. Maybe it helps to get some load off my mind.

As for the above, well, it's just rant. I know that I'm just feeling a little down, but that knowledge doesn't really help ease my emotions. So out comes spam, and for the first time in weeks, I shall have a nice long sleep to reward myself. Will be back to the usual me in no time at all.

On a side note, went out for a movie with my sister and her friends since it's the "cheapest entertainment available on Christmas Eve". Alvin and the Chipmunks 2 was much better than the first, loved Simon and Theodore (sorry, still no love for Alvin). I really, really wanna watch Princess and the Frog at the cinemas again though. Then there's Avatar (didn't catch my interest until I saw the trailer just now) and Sherlock Holmes and Tooth Fairy and The Imaginarium of Dr Parnassius and Oceans and Diary of a Wimpy Kid and Shrek Forever After and... Gah! Too many movies waiting for me! >.<

Okay that's it. End rant end crap-talk. Gotta do up a huge reflection post before the year officially ends @__@ (nobody is even bothering to update themselves with my blog, I know, but I guess it's good to store my thoughts somewhere...)

2009-12-14T21:53:00.003+08:00

I'm just shit to you. You can say all the nice sweet little things you want, and I will continue to be deluded time and again, but at the end of the day, I'm still that damned piece of shit to you.

Like every other human being, you can selfish, self-centered, self-absorbed, and even if you aren't the above, I am never important enough, my words and actions are never enough, but yet I hold on to this, accelerating my fall into oblivion. Nobody is perfect, but I really do wish that someone would be imperfectly perfect for me, to make me feel like I'm not just some dispensable ornament to other people's lives. Because I know that is exactly what I am to everyone around me.

Would you even have the slightest idea how excruciatingly painful it is to be that odd, sore thumb sticking out? No you don't and no you won't.

I'm going crazy.

2009-11-29T03:08:00.001+08:00

I wish I could be a part of the vast skies, mingling with the clouds and staring at the stars late into the night. I wish I could soar high and leave everything behind, cease to exist in a physical form and allow my consciousness to float adrift for eternity. And by the time my fantasies ended, my legs were shaking, my body was icy cold, and I realised with a start that my old friend had never really bade me farewell, it was always there, always waiting for me, preying on my vulnerability and helplessness.

If only someone could understand.

'Nuff Said

2009-11-28T02:13:00.000+08:00

View all Singapore events on Eventful

And please do not mention anything about exams or marketing =.=

~Oh, Poor Unfortunate Soul~

2009-11-10T23:43:00.008+08:00

It took me a lot of days to think about writing this post, even pushed back my post about tabor's 19th as well as a ton of other more important stuff just to write this to you. Not that I'm expecting you to appreciate my words, but I guess these thoughts will only bother me more until I let it out. So, here's to you --

有些时候，我真的不了解你们这种人到底在想些什么。

你知道世上最烂的人是怎么样的人吗？不是杀人犯，不是强奸犯，不是爱说谎的人，而是只能通过贬低别人来抬高自己的那种人。

记得你跟我说过，你这个人不记仇，不拘小节，说得你好似十分潇洒。可我近来看到的种种都相差甚远呐！

当初和你争吵后，你拿他人的国籍来作话题大肆讽刺批评，如今你又找到别人新的攻击点了吗？你当真认为这种行为是对的吗？无论是什么样的情况都好，你觉得你践踏的是别人吗？抑或是你自己的人性呢？

像你这种人，自私，幼稚，虚伪，而且心胸狭窄得不得了。假装无私的人，却从来都只用自己的角度看待事情，不为他人着想。自称无所谓的人，却老是耿耿于怀，怀恨于心。感觉上好像很讨厌脏话的人，却在别人破口大骂时笑不拢嘴。这就是我现在所看到的你。

你说，很少与别人争吵，你知道为什么吗？不因为别的，因为你只喜欢和那些盲目地赞同你的看法的人混在一起。偶然出现了那些不满你种种缺陷的人，闹翻了之后，你只会用谎言来保护自己的立场，并用讽刺来让自己觉得占了优势。当然，其中少不了那些只会围在你身边为你说话的，那些你认为是你“朋友”的人。

让我来告诉你吧。没有人是完美的，可是对一些人来说，别人的缺陷是不可容忍的。真正为你好的人，真正为你好的“朋友”，肯定会当面告诉你你的缺点，在你错的时候斥责你或者劝你，而不是像哈巴狗似的讨好你为你说好话。

很多事情都与我无关，可是在我看到了你这一面之后，又要怎么样坦然和你交朋友呢？我可以在这里告诉你，我不是哈巴狗，如果觉得你错了，我会责骂你，因为我看不过去。虽然以你的性格来说，又会对我怀恨在心，甚至每天诅咒我，或者寻找新的攻击点，贬低我来抬高你自己。。。劝劝你，长大一点吧，这世界不需要更多像你一样心胸狭窄的人。你是人，我也是人，别人也是人，在做出这一切举动之时，你毁掉的不是别人的名誉，而是你自己的怜悯之心。同时，你捍卫的不是你自己所谓的清白或清高，事实是你正在告诉全世界的人自己有多肤浅，有多爱记仇，有多幼稚，有多自私。

我不想针对别的事情说谁对谁错，我只知道你的这种思想绝对是扭曲的。好好想想吧，再也不见了。

It's A Love Story

2009-10-19T20:01:00.001+08:00

Romeo, save me, they try to tell me how to feel

This love is difficult, but it's real

Don't be afraid, we'll make it out of this mess

It's a love story

Baby just say yes

~Love Story, Taylor Swift~

Those people whom I dedicate this to, you'll know who you are once you set your eyes on the above lyrics. Before I know it, the happiness of you two have already become so important to me. And hence, whatever it is, my simplest and deepest wish is for you both to be happy.

Yet, I know that at the end of the day, I'm still the odd one out. To put it crudely, what happens between the both of you is none of my business. It's your love story, and I'm just some passer-by. I complain about constantly being dumped at one corner, being ignored, and now, reflecting on my past actions, the only thing I can say about myself now is... I've been little more than a pest.

So, I shall stop my prying and let you two continue writing your story without any more hindrances. I will wait until you all feel like talking to me. Don't ever forget that if any one of you need anyone to speak to, rant to, cry to, I'm always here. Love you both.

Overdue post for 23rd Sept

2009-09-26T23:46:00.001+08:00

On the 23rd of September every year, I always find it hard to balance my time to celebrate the birthdays of both one of my besties as well as my sister.

But for the very first time in years, I got to celebrate with both Wen Han and my sis! ^ - ^

Here's what I did for Wen Han's birthday -- I've pretty much given her lots of different kinds of things for her birthday, so this year I've decided to give her handmade gifts! ^^

#1 was a handmade wish bracelet: I spent a bomb on the crystals >.<

The twine was so thick it was near impossible to get those beads in, and one of the pretty beads cracked >_>

The finished product! =3

#2 was this!! OMG I LOVE IT!!! > w < !! This was a doll I sewn :D Lots of ugly stitches all over since sewing is really not my forte, but I'm glad it turned out rather well.

Met Wen Han for K-Lunch: Her birthday theme was about doing things with people that she never had the chance to, and thus we went for a 2-person Mayday karaoke session.

And this year both her mum and her aunt gave her bracelets as well, so we used the wish bracelet as a wish anklet instead =x

Ahahahaha she loved the doll! I told her it was meant to be a monkey but I thought it looked more like a cow. Then she looked and it and said it looked like a crossbreed between a monkey and a zebra. =_=''' In the end she decided it looked like a thief. LOL! So she named it 小贼. I love you 小贼!! XD

After that I met my sister and we shopped around and slacked around for a bit. Bought this musical box thingy for her (which I also happen to like a lot since my secondary school days). As you turn the handle you get to listen to the tune of "Beauty and the Beast". =3

For dinner we were headed to Kuishin Bo. Dang, we ate so much that I really thought I would end up puking. No more buffets for the rest of the year, please. >.<'''

Only the eclairs, cheesecake, and ice cream was good... The rest were horrible. >_>'''

Glutton caught red-handed!

And my very first go at chocolate fondue. Thanks arh, I know I very sua gu. =_=

Oh and we also got these from the capsule machines at Suntec. Whee I love these! XD In total we "turned" like, 5 of these in total. Ouch. X__X

And THIS present for my sis cost a bomb! Isn't it so pretty? XD

Back at home - another birthday cake =_=''' We were so full I only had ONE bite and I felt like dying already. =0='''

That was it for 23/09/2009! May every year be as joyful as this! (But I really hope that I would never spend this much money for any birthdays ever again! >.<)

你们的快乐就是我的快乐

2009-09-20T02:25:00.001+08:00

Nothing makes me happier than knowing my loved ones are happy. So, the best gift you guys can ever give me would be your happiness.

There is really no need to say your thanks because I know deep down that we are all grateful to have each other in our lives. And I will always be there for you guys when you need someone. ^__^

I was really touched while reading two particular blogs tonight. Ophira, Ban Ban, I love you both too. Moooooacks <333333

short notice

2009-09-17T22:03:00.001+08:00

hey all, i've changed my gmail add to tanshehui [at] gmail.com

please direct all future mail there. i'll be using this for gmail chat as well. in other words, i'm going to focus all my various email accounts into this new one because i'm really lazy to check my mail in multiple accounts each day =\

recess week is coming! i can't waitttttttttt..........

ok bye.

New Room, Old Room?

2009-09-10T01:43:00.000+08:00

Okay, sorry about that retarded post from earlier back. But I really enjoyed taking all those pictures of my (and my sister's) toys.

I want to talk more about my room stuff, but I'll spam overdue pictures of the baby first. She's getting cuter by the day~ <33333

Bad lighting

Terrible lighting

The outcome of the photofix funciton on my mobile phone. Er............. X___X

But she's still so cute~

Didn't really wanna see some people so I try not to go down. Still, I really want to see more of baby.... Sigh.

On to room-related stuff -- I now share a room with my sister instead of my grandmother! Cos it's getting really hard to communicate with her without flaring up at all the shit she's capable of and I can't study at all when I'm sharing a room with her. So my sister agreed to the arrangement months back. So we should have been happy..... not!

Problem was my UNCLE, who came at the last minute institutionalizing (ew) the changes without proper planning. The result? Lots of unhappiness, lack of storage solutions and constant whining from my sister dearest. ~___~ (Okay la I also keep whining about her stuff and the lack of space)

Look at the mess -- I wonder how much space would be needed to keep all that stuff.

Oh and Xian, this was what my bookshelf looked like just 2 days before you dropped by at my place. @___@ Still dare say I'm neat? LOL

We're still struggling over what to do for the room now but I guess this is already a lot better than the hell I was in previously. Maybe if we can afford it we'll save up for nicer furniture and other little stuff to brighten things up in the room. I need a nice poster! (Don't really like the current Mayday 为爱而生 poster on my wall now, I think it's nothing special. =x )

And okay I've got an excursion trip at Little India tomorrow plus I need to cab back to school for another 4 hours of tutorials after that. So I really should be resting instead of blogging. Jeez I don't even have time to rant about school properly. wtf. =.=

Ciaoz~

My Story - My Family Episode 1

2009-09-09T23:52:00.000+08:00

Hi. I am 毛毛. That's pronounced mao3 mao2.

This is me. This is my story.

My life started off at some unknown factory in China. I never knew who my parents were or where I came from, other than that Disney tag on my butt that says "Made in China" and distributed to somewhere far from my homeland. Sad life, I know.

But ever since I got adopted by my mummy 5 years ago, I've had a whole new family. My story revolves around them. In fact, if not for me half of my family wouldn't even have been taken in.

First, why was I called 毛毛? That was the nickname of a donkey-hubby who once belonged to my mummy. She treated him like her own younger brother. Too bad he was led astray later on. Which doesn't bother me at all since I'm still loved exclusively.

Anyway, I figured the way to start off my story would be to introduce my family members.

First are the gluttons. Say hi to the fatso Doraemon and Mega 毛毛. I'm pretty sure they ate their way to being this huge.

But I guess fatso Dora still has a long way to go if he wants to catch up with mega 毛毛....

Most of my family members don't have specific names, except for me. Which makes me feel really special but sometimes it's hard when you're trying to refer to someone else. X'mas teddy here likes getting crucified. Without his pants on. @__@

Well, clover teddy belongs to my aunt. But my mummy really loves it to bits. And she doesn't have one of her own. I wonder if they still sell it out in shops? I definitely wouldn't mind another cute face like that in the household...

Cheapo Pinko Dolpho. Heard the real things are ugly. She's really cute, and only cost $2!

And here we have a Japanese kiddo, a gift from mummy's friend Wen Han. I suspect he's linked to me because he's from this place called "Disneyland"... (Looks at the Disney tag on my butt again). But I don't know enough Japanese to communicate with him. I heard he's a homosexual too! Doesn't THAT sound sexy? :D

Another nameless doggie that was a friend's gift. He's one low-profile guy. Don't know much about him.

Gift from mummy's friend Xin Wei. Don't tell him I told you this, but he's balding.

I heard this hippo was one of a triplet of hippos. The other two were given to PX and WH. I wonder if his two brothers are doing fine?

Cushion 毛毛 from Wen Han when mummy turned 17. We're forever teasing her about how her nostrils were of the same size as her eyes. Pretty scary if you think about it more, actually.

Here's the latest addition to our family: Moo Moo, a present again, from Gon. It's the first cow in the family although my mummy is a cow herself.

Sorry, that tail is just too sexy, I can't stop looking at it....... @___@

Oriental panda beauty. She's stunning. And from China too!

I heard I still have some long-lost family members out there. And right now I shall embark on a journey, an adventure, to seek out my other family members. And I will slay whatever may stand in my way. HIIIIYAAAHHHH!

Okay bye bye see you all in Episode 2.

2009-09-02T00:54:00.001+08:00

Lately, there's been a lot of angst around.

I don't know why this is so, and while I try my best to alleviate the unhappiness of those I love, I guess it's not something that would be appreciated all the time.

I suck at making small talk, or being humourous. I'm just the boring, anti-social old me with nothing much to offer, other than a listening ear and genuine loyalty and concern.

When I ask questions about you, it shows that I care a great deal about you.

When I hold your hand, it shows that I am truly comfortable around you.

When I pour out my woes to you, it shows that I trust you with every ounce of faith I can possibly muster.

So, please, when you're hurt, don't hurt by yourself, you have a friend in me. When you're lonely, don't shelf yourself away in some forgotten corner, open up to me. Not because I'm a nosey parker, but because I'm here to be your emotional support and listening ear. No matter how busy I am, no matter how emo I may become myself, I am still here.

I would never want to replace anybody in your life, and I dare not think that I am the one closest to you. But, as a friend, I want to tell you that no matter what other people may say about you, no matter how other people may judge you, no matter who may hurt or abandon you along the way, no matter how much you've come to dislike or even hate yourself....

I STAND BY YOU.

And that, my dear friend Ophira, is what I promise you.

Love~