flight of the bottle rocket

25.07.2008

2008-07-25T19:20:00.001-07:00

this is the second time i've been near a computer apart from dire and absolute need in what, two months? weird.

so, apologies all around if you've been getting annoyed with the goober that's not returning your calls. i've gone through a strange transformation: the phone is now the best and preferred way to get ahold of me.

a while back i picked up a copy of yinsh. seemed like a good thing to do at the time. every so often i'm in the mood for a good abstract strategy game. people get weird about chess and go is a stupid fad at cafes around town. yinsh is something i haven't seen around and is the kind of thing that, despite its no doubt being huge in other parts, i can say "i was into it before it was cool." it's what living in victoria is all about: the mingling of weird fads and cafes.

so, the birth of a new project is underway. i suppose there's an analogy to made about peeing on a test strip to see if i'm in luck. that's the state it's in. i know i want to do a project and i've been collecting old window sashes, antique glass and mirrors, antique hardware, strange tools, and other oddities of age and wear. i already have a few old frames and a violin case in the works.

some notes, though. i recently read ecclesiastes and it makes more sense to me now. in effect, i have to admit that i have nothing to say. everything is indeed onanistic and vain and pointing this out is no different. but, now that i have nothing to say and nothing i want to say, saying anything at all is so much easier.

concept for a show: renovate an heritage home. all the old material of architectural significance (windows, doors, moldings, flooring, hardware, etc) that is no good for restoration is saved as-is when removed. this residual of the restoration is hung from ceiling supports in no particular order in a gallery with white walls. everything will be hung with between five and six feet clearance from the floor and will fill the room so people have to walk around everything without hitting their head. shostakovitch will be cranked out of a cheap, old ghettoblaster placed on the floor in the middle of the room. give it a dumb kitschy title like "so you think you can dance."

29.06.2008

2008-06-29T15:06:00.000-07:00

i've been off-line for over a month now. a lot has happened since, but i won't get into any of that. i won't get into much of anything, i suppose. i find i don't exactly miss the internet when i don't use it and a month's unread emails reveal little of any substance. the events of the period between the last and this current post have left me with the impression that much of life is onanistic. we run around with our beliefs and our opinions and our causes and much if not most of it is of little bennefit to any other but ourselves or the very like-minded we find in our circles. conforming to which trend-based cause best defines me as an individual and gains me cool friends?

04.05.2008

2008-05-04T15:41:00.000-07:00

just realized, i never did follow up on my last post. i did get the job, you'll be happy to hear. i'm working at vintage woodworks, a company which specializes in heritage millwork. right now, i'm doing my time as the general labour force. i've been sanding my fingers raw, off-loading truckloads of raw stock by hand, driving a beastly shop truck on errand runs, and making coffee. next week i learn how to boil hardware. i assume that means cleaning and restoring vintage hardware, based on what i saw my forebearer work on.

all in all, like this job. but we'll leave it at that for now. talk shop another time....

22.04.2008

2008-04-22T17:06:00.000-07:00

alas, i have broken the cardinal law of starving artistry: i applied for a real job.

we'll see how it comes together. maybe i hear back, maybe not. it's a traditional woodworking shop looking for everything from labourers through journeymen and it does hold my interest. more details to follow, should i hear back.

there's not much other news to speak of around here. later this week i'll check out the venue for the next poasis show and see what i'm up against. then it's on with the artist cap and the construction of a killer illuminated monument to lost friendships. and, of course, all while struggling through the tremendous burden of 'shadows of the past' and hypersensitivity to my failings.

i have to clean my place, too. wee.

17.04.2008

2008-04-17T23:24:00.000-07:00

it's been a busy week over here. a lot has happened, for better or worse. among the highlights are a soft eviction notice (our cousin is getting married and the couple-to-be need privacy over tenants), renewed career prospects/potential, stunning clarity-through-confusion, and a paid weekend gig cleaning my in-laws front garden. but, to top it all is the chance my mom will not only be visiting in town during the next poasis show, but will be exhibiting alongside me. we're both excited about the prospects.

all said and done, it's been a good weekend. (huh, i almost misspelled that 'weakened.' but it's been a bad couple of days for typing....) there's struggle to life, but struggle keeps me interested.

lately i've realized just how important imagination is to me. it's not my attention that needs grabbing (that can be accomplished with a shiney foil wrapper); rather, it's my imagination that needs to be engaged with anything if ever i'm to be present. when my imagination is active, i'm active. otherwise, i sit around waiting for something to intrigue me.

i'm a natural explorer and this instinct for seeing things keeps me moving. it thrives on questions that lead to more questions and is thwarted by answers (possible exception to the open-ended variety). i suppose this works well with my claustrophobia. i can't stand the strangle-hold of the known environs and the predictablility of pattern. i need to be able to move and i need to be able to move someplace new and unexplored.

i've always considered this a bad thing about me. it's limited my resume to short spurts of employment in a wide number of fields and experiences. thus, when employers browse it, all they see is a kid who can't keep a job or commit to a career path. consider: almost all of my jobs have come by way of personal introductions and references (ie - my dad knows somebody who's looking for help) or desperation (the warm-body syndrome). i continue to be at odds with this exploratory weirdness of mine. as much as i desire and crave deep-grown roots, i need to be on the way to new territory.

however, having said that, i am coming to accept this about myself. it's a natural attitude for an artist of any integrity, i think. who are we but explorers, always asking why? and where next? and who with?

lately, though, i've seen the pattern of stagnancy. i'm in a lull, waiting for some shiney question to glimmer in the bushes as i walk past, snare my feet, and pull them onto some strange pathway through the forest. i need to let go of a lot of preconcieved notions of pattern and tendency before i'll be able to see anything but a discarded foil wrapper, though. but i gain faith with each passing step, and some day....

04a.04.2008

2008-04-04T18:03:00.000-07:00

another interesting link, stumbled across as i tromped through the world wide web: www.transformingculture.org. it's a high-level conference on the art/faith conversation that took place just this week. features the likes of eugene peterson and jeremy begbie, to give you an idea of scale. it looks interesting: i'll have to browse around to see if anything has been posted regarding the outcome of the discussions.

also, speaking of web searches: if ever you're feeling particularily masochistic, do a search for the term "church art." oye! the sad reality is that to many if not most, this kind of image is the very definition and embodiment of church and christian art. compare the bulk of what you find on this search to the images presented on civa's website under the 'exhibitions' and 'gallery' sections.

to be fair, i'm convinced that if you were to segment the population-at-large into various categories of art savviness and do the same to a church audience, you'd have the same basic ratios represented. most would have no understanding of art outside commercially available or popular-media driven images, a siazable-but-small portion would consider themselves appreciators of art, but all-in-all the portion of those who consider themselves within the gravitaional pull of the art world is scant in relation to the whole.

it would be unfair to expect all of the church to suddenly become familiar and appreciative of art. but, another subject for another post. the dinner bell rings....

04.04.2008

2008-04-04T11:02:00.000-07:00

in my studies this morning i stumbled across www.civa.org, the christians in the visual arts group. on a whim and after some deliberate browsing, i bought a membership. on first glance, it seemed a nice blend of the scholarly and the professional, with the focus quite properly on the 'art' portion of 'christian art.' so, we'll see how this shapes up. i've a few of their publications on the way and all the snazzy newsletters etc. hopefully this will extend my range of influences (inward as well as outward) and tip me off to a lot of great conversation.

the last few days have been rather intriguing to me. preperation for my book project has brought up a number of points to consider. i don't have time to address them today, but i will say that i've had a major overhaul of many of my assumptions. putting my thoughts, theories, and observations to paper has proven an interesting process in that i've had to make deliberate evaluations on all my views and vantage points. also, i've been exposed to a number of other viewpoints on the topics i've been exploring.

there's not a lot of interesting material on the art/faith topic, but the sheer volume of the material that is there is interesting. example: there are countless recollections of artists making (what i consider) very appropriate and even 'comfortable' art for a church event, only to be censored by the church leadership for fear the art is too provocative, controversial, or simply not suitable for a "G-rated space". i get the impression that a number of churches eager for a new visual arts program do little to no research on the subject and thus have no clear vision of what shape the program will take. in the end you see a lot of what i call a 'decorative program' filled with bland material and disgruntled artists.

i suspect the church art debate has largely stagnated at a point that allows artists to practice but does not allow educated viewership. thus, the artists are producing viable work, but the congregation is not at the point to appreciate that. i believe the next step along the way is in bringing up a class of patrons, viewers, collectors, and supporters of faith-based art and artists. i think this will better serve artists in church congregations by allowing them a proper conversation that all art thrives on, rather than the gift-shop variety monologue they've been forced into.

i have to cut this intro short here and pick up my wife from work. i'll continue this later, to be sure. (and pardon the generalizations.)

30a.03.2008

2008-03-30T20:58:00.000-07:00

it's late and i'm tired but my intestinal issues will keep me up a while yet. yeah, everything you've ever wanted to know about me....

i've been considering putting some of my thoughts/theories to better use than online diatribe. i've been playing around with the idea of writing a collection of essays and compiling them into a booklet or similar. however, events of the past week and various conversations since have brought me to the conclusion that there's an audience for this sort of thing, whether they realize it or not.

consider how often people are surprised to find out that their favorite artists have some connection to church. they read about them in art history texts and see them in poster shops and then are in strange disbelief when they discover the spiritual connection. the linking of 'art' and 'faith' is a stagnant debate that remains as such because too many people are new to the topic. once they reach the connection, there's nothing beyond. there's no linking the terms 'good art' and 'faith' let alone 'great art.' i wonder if the next step is getting artists to be artists or churches to be viewers? quality art loses its church connection unless it keeps to the cliche and church art seldom finds its way to quality.

generalities, of course, but whatever.

so tomorrow my plan is to research the topics. likely if not certainly my first batch of writings will be geared toward the church-going crowd. i want to have a booklet ready and printed for the next poasis conference with essays on curation, educating the self-proclaimed "i don't know much about that art stuff" crowd perhaps, maybe even a few notes on pushing the edges of the comfortable church art we're all used to. we'll see where this project takes me. all i know is that i want something that will help get the conversations to the next level, past the 'is art good?' question.

so wish me luck. and buy a copy when all is finished. you'll like it. really.

30.03.2008

2008-03-30T13:38:00.000-07:00

it's cold in victoria. every day, arizona looks just that much better.

i'm trying to avoid a rant here. i'm a little annoyed at the treatments of and around the art/faith conversation. you know: are we "christian" artists (because the christian bit is always in quotes like it's a dirty word or something,) or ar we believing artists? artists of faith, perhaps? this is usually where the debate ends. there's arguments surrounding either term, some reference to the artisans who built the tabernacle, a few words on the secular vs. sacred worlds, etc. the issue with me is the stagnancy of the debate. it's like the whole church community is so hung up on semantics that they forget that art, simply put, is art. call it what you will, it is still art.

the debates should, in my opinion, be focused more around audience and intention, or audience and message to be more specific. whether i'm a christian artist or a believing artist, i still have to be aware of my audience and the message i want to convey; the adjective doesn't change any of that. however we define ourselves, we still create work with a purpose and meaning in mind and present this work to a particular audience. i think there's more value in understanding an audience and its responses to image (in subject, style, and form), and understanding how we, as artists, can best convey our messages to these audiences.

i would argue that we would be much better off freeing our artists to experiment than blugeoning them with scripture passages citing the "art is good" philosophy. we need to get out of the ideal that christian = happy and let our artists express the christian life in all its complexities.

but, i'll continue this topic later. the computer is needed.

19.03.2008

2008-03-19T16:46:00.000-07:00

last night played out like a reality tv show. curation: impossible or something like that. several churches on the peninsula get together every year and put on a good friday service. this year, they decided to add a visual component, and they wanted to bring in poasis in a consultory role. it didn't shape out as such.

basically: the day before yesterday was the first real briefing i had on the event, details limited to "about 8 works." i came into the site at 7pm yesterday evening and, quite fortuantely, all the artwork was there. but, i had only two hours to put it all together.

i think the end result is a good show. i'll wait until it's all down to post my comments, just for fun and (mostly) because i have to leave now.

but quickly: it's the first time my work has been behind glass. it's strange, a glass pane and a locked display dividing me and my own work.

18.03.2008

2008-03-18T15:11:00.000-07:00

last night i made an effort to get some form of printable portfolio ready for presentation. nothing fancy, just some shots better than those i post online. sadly, a cheap camera and bad to nil lighting in my studio etc. the good news: i did get a web-worthy shot of my revelation decoder ring. wee.

next time i try this, it'll be with my proper equipment. get some proper slides made and take prints and digital scans off those. once i have time, money, and motivation all together, i'll get out the equipment.

16.03.2008

2008-03-16T16:50:00.001-07:00

forgot to mention: last post was lucky number 100. there should have been lots of fanfare and celebration with cake. but, i kind of missed the ball on that one, i guess.

in a few days i head to calagary for a visit. i should check out what the glenbow has on display. maybe swing by some of the other downtown galleries on a sort of research trip. sadly, most of the galleries i run across this side of the straight are filled with tourist art and various forms of kitsch. i'd like to get out of the entrapment of robert bateman prints and emily carr knock-offs and see what else is happening in the larger markets.

i sometimes wonder how much my work suffers/benefits by associations on/to the island. i don't have access to much in terms of the recent theories. everything comes by way of print magazines, art history texts, and the internet. i'm out of the loop when it comes to current exchanges. counter-point: i'm not exposed to a lot of the pretense the larger centres tend to hold. i'm sure there's a freshness that must be evident when seen with outside eyes.

i can use the boost of new ideas, to say the least. i find everything once again stagnating somewhere between disillusion and a real job. victoria's a small market; i have no connections or credentials to carry me elsewhere and i'm not sure my style is bound to get attention here. mind you, i keep pulling back and have yet to put out something i think is particularily worthy of excitement. i think i'm waiting for an encounter with an artwork that gets me excited again, like my first walk through the wynn collection in las vegas.

but... these days have bee na little rough on me lately. maybe i just need a change of scenery and a chance to plug into the art circle once again. i tend to feel a little lost and disconnected here of late.

14.03.2008

2008-03-14T16:59:00.000-07:00

i finally did it: i scored a deal at a thrift store.

well, assumed, anyway. i found this oval mirror in a ratty frame. it looked like the kind of cheap framed mirror made in the 50s or so and repainted by subsequent generations to avoid a dated look while maintaining that killer retro vibe. but: the original backing was torn open. i peeked behind and saw that the mirror itself was lined with a sheet of very old newspaper, cut to fit the glass. the mirror itself featured a patch of markings i've seen on my parents antique furniture. so, i wagered the $5.99 the price tag wanted.

when i got home, i pulled the back off (not having much to hold it on) and took a better look at the paper. one page came out of the classifieds and, under the "situations vacant" heading, advertised a clerk's position offering a salary of £1 per week. another page referenced a letter written "last week" and printed the reply, dated may 19, 1891.

so, in all probability, i have a 16"x12" antique beveled oval mirror dating to at least 1891.

now, what to do with the frame? it's likely just as old, original bracket, all that stuff. i think it's been repainted a number of times. it's wooden, not the best construction, and all the repainting has left the finish wanting. i think i'll construct a new wooden frame, of course keeping the newspapers in with it.

i also picked up another mirror, also $5.99. it's newer, homemade frame, but it looks great.

but, i should eat something.

29.02.2008

2008-02-29T17:12:00.000-08:00

i had no idea we were in a leap year until some point last night, when the seperate strands of thought known as "friday," "last day in february," and "february 28" all came together and upset my television viewing plans. but regardless: happy leap year. too bad leap years aren't like daylight savings, when you get an extra hour of sleep.

but to buisness:

i have a number of prints remaining from the 'ruth' edition. they're run from the block used to print portrait of a woman, using the first 15" of width. i had them at my show last weekend, if you were there. the image sizes in at 17.5" x 15" on 24" x 18" drawing paper. silkscreen ink was used to bring out the woodgrain and the brush strokes. they were all hand-pressed, hand-inked, hand-anythinged and feature all the appropriate smudgemarks and fingerprints. they even feature the little marks left when the tape used to hold them to my studio wall pulled off some of the paper. they're even wrapped in plastic. let me know if you'd like to pick one up. $35 plus shipping/packing costs.

also, i've put up images from the love show on my portfolio page for your viewing pleasure. they're not the best images, having been snapped while on display.

but, dinner awaits.

25.02.2008

2008-02-25T21:36:00.000-08:00

so. yeah. today's the day. i've taken my dream of school out behind the garage and shot it. it was getting on in years, feeble, dying of four fatal diseases, etc. it cost way too much to keep alive. my artistic aspiration put up a better fight, yet remains on life support. i'll ration my supplies until they deplete, and rely on whatever i can scrape up from there.

but i don't want to get into a cranky rant. i'll just leave it at that and hope this is just a bad day. and hope that i can find a better job than fast-food.

24.02.2008

2008-02-24T16:06:00.001-08:00

well, the show has come and the show has gone. the two days since have been spent blankly staring into space. after three months of working on this show, it's nice to have a day off.

08.02.2008

2008-02-08T16:50:00.000-08:00

last night, for the first time in weeks to months, i had a great night sleep. thus, i spent the morning with an americano and rehearsed my blocks. the first two went very well and i have images i'm quite happy with. i managed to lock onto the more emotive/expressive qualities. hope it works out. the other ones, however, have been less than kind to me. it's no surprise, given that i was more confident with the sketches i had coming into today.

i think i have to take a bit of a break, should i remember how it's done. it's been a very long time since i've been home, it seems, and anywhere outside of home i'm haunted with feelings of guilt over some perceived criticism, like i should be setting the table or helping cook dinner instead of napping on the couch. i've taken to hiding in my books in defence of assumed allegations, though it never lets me rest.

but, nap i shall and return to my sketches this evening. hopefully soon i'll be able to assemble my blocks and begin carving.

07.02.2008

2008-02-07T19:54:00.000-08:00

i don't know if it's time to "officially" unveil the poster, but whatever. i'm not around a computer that often anymore and i suppose i should get word out. the important stuff is accurate: time, date, place, people involved. the name of the show is still sort of a fill-in for whatever we may decide to call it. regardless: here's my poster.

04.02.2008

2008-02-04T14:56:00.000-08:00

an update on the experimentation front: the canvas i had intended to use for the prints is too coarse to register a clear print. i could gob on the ink but at the expense of sharpness. thus: i've picked up some large paper on which to make the print.

i could use woodcut on a painted/primed canvas, but i really want the support material to show through. however, i'm planning on using the blocks on future projects. combine them with transfers or something.

my plan is now: 8 woodcut prints on paper, 2 of which will incorporate colour. frame them like my banners with stained oak strips top and bottom (supported as needed so the weight isn't held by the paper). i'll also have for sale 25 smaller prints of one of my study blocks, a revisiting of ruth (as seen on in the line of kings).

so that is how things stand at present.

today i have my paper, tomorrow i should have my wood, wednesday i hope my carving tools arrive. i traded a woodblock for a new set of carving tools, knives, and a high-end mallet from lee valley.

anyway, i should be getting back to work. but before i go, a concept:

last night i was rummaging through my studio and found my carbon transfer papers. i had the idea to draw a footprint on regular paper using the carbon paper, then a smaller one beside it. next to the images i'd write: carbon footprint reduced by 25%.

01.02.2008

2008-02-01T15:21:00.000-08:00

crud, it's already february. i was about to make an announcement to the effect of "my show is booked for feb. 22nd," but then i looked at todays date and realized just how soon the 22nd actually is. so on that note: i'll be busy the next three weeks.

today i'm busy working on a smaller woodcut project, a study for the larger pieces i have worked out for my show. my killer experiment: woodblock print on canvas. i hope the silkscreen ink i have will work for this, otherwise i have to figure out some other option that will work on the wood and leave a clean mark on the raw canvas.

so far the carving is coming along well. about half the block i have is still soaking wet, making it a little difficult to get a clean cut. it's like working in some odd mixture of fibre and half-dried paste. but, the forms are basic at least. less detail to ruin.

anyway, my back and shoulders are protesting my having been hunched over a block of wood for a number of hours and are threatening job action. i'm going to rest them for a while.

remember: feb 22nd, lambrick park church (1780 feltham rd), doors at 7.

27.01.2008

2008-01-27T21:55:00.001-08:00

another photoshop time-kill. a treatment of my vegas girl, van gogh's peasant woman. i set off the alarm at the wynn gallery leaning in to get a better look. i think this piece, more than any other, triggered every artistic instinct and desire within. similarly, the resulting talk with the doorman triggered every art historical interest.

so, it's looking as though my show with rhonda and the belo partnership is booked for feb 22nd. keep the evening open. i can assure you the cake alone will be worth the trip.

21.01.2008

2008-01-21T16:59:00.000-08:00

i tried taking a few shots of my revelation decoder ring, none of which were in focus once downloaded. they all look decent on the camera's view screen....

one of these days i'm going to take proper shots of my work and have them printed out. a more proper hard-copy portfolio than i currently have available.

well, i should get back to work. i'm trying to design a stamp of sorts to put on my next few pieces as a sort of signature. might add a little texture. might not.

but, i'm off. too much to do and a very scattered mind with which to do it all in.

20.01.2008

2008-01-20T16:13:00.000-08:00

again, i spent too much time and energy trying to build up the ever-allusive final image for my show. my creative juices gelatinise after a while and there's no way i'm capable of doing anything but stare into space or into my coffee mug. and so, i play with photoshop and design a poster. you may remember my last effort at avoiding work, confessed on 16.10.2007.

but, work does progress. i managed to cut back quite a lot of material, leaving the residual impression of a few hours work. sometimes i wish my work bore more evidence of the months of planning and preparatory work. but, i take what i can get.

this week i'm meeting up with rhonda (my accomplice in this crime) and will hopefully have a date set for the show. i think i may need the motivation of a deadline to lock my ever-allusive final image. there's always one that refuses to settle.

anyway, i recently came to the discovery that i've burned several hours, have not eaten anything, and am now quite hungry. if you'll excuse me....

18.01.2008

2008-01-18T21:26:00.000-08:00

i've been toying with the layout of the blog, as my devoted fan base has certainly noticed. for now, this is it. i think i've done fidgeting to the point of 5-pixel adjustments. what do you think?

i've also begun work on my portfolio page and that may be a while in the making yet. my personal site is a little further off yet. but soon enough, soon enough....

09.01.2008

2008-01-09T16:03:00.000-08:00

so....

it turns out i can't write much, though i have far too much to put in writing. the highlight of today's post: earlier today i bought an underwood typewriter. i haven't taken a close enough look yet, but from a quick browsing through google it seems to be a 1950s leader model. still works, in great condition, etc. i got it for so many obvious reasons, but the best i can think of so far is to take it to one of those cafes with the wireless internet.

anyway, dinner beckons.