Yes I would like to learn a language
That I could speak, know how it’s written
I think I’ll start with the one I heard
Those people speaking in Great Britain!

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Well one day a little boy
Asked the King if he’d like a toy
The King nodded his head
And still nothing was said
By the way the child’s name was Roy

Roy and the King’s friendship was true
Of the friendship soon everyone knew
And though in the castle…some
Still thought the King Dumb
Roy said “After all…he’s only two!”

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I love it when the Spring comes
And my leaves just start to pop
But my secret wish is
I wish that I could hop!

Oh I’d jump around the grassy slope
I’d run through underbrush
And sometimes I’d just walk slowly
I’d not be in a rush

I’d be careful not to step
On tiny living things
And I’d only go where I could get
My limbs through openings

But my feet are way below the ground
Attached to roots real deep
I need them all to stand so tall
Especially on a hill so steep

‘though it gets kinda boring
Always standing here
I guess it’s what I have to do
Year after year after year

I know that I will never be
Free to run around
But Gee, I’d be so happy
If I could just sit down

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A happy hen chose to give her eggs away…on an Easter morn

There were many many children living in her town

And she sought to see them smiling instead of see them frown

She dyed her eggs in colors so that she could keep account

Of which child had received an egg and too… which child had not

When other hens heard about her plan they decided to chip in

So in that henhouse on that day a tradition would begin

But it is a law of nature…chickens aren’t real wise

A hen is brighter than a rooster..but they never tell the “guys”

Anyway slow hens aren’t fast enough to deliver eggs in time

So they sought the help of other animals…at least so goes this rhyme

They couldn’t ask the fox…his tastes were much too fowl

And they couldn’t ask the sparrow, or the robin or the owl

They needed something fast and able to hide eggs by the dozens

Then Mr. Bunny hopped by their house on his way to see his cousins

The hens all cackled at him as he passed their way

“Oh Mr. Bunny we need your help…won’t you stop and stay?”

“Well I can’t stay too long…I’m running very late!”

“What was it that you need from me?” He asked coming through the gate

As the hens explained their plan to him he twitched his nose and thought

“I suppose I COULD help you hens…but I NEVER can get caught!”

“In my hiding plan I must be quick and I MUST be very clever”

“I don’t want to be part of Easter dinner…colored eggs and Hasenpfeffer!”

And so the legend began that year and has continued to this day

But there are those who doubt it and loudly they shout “Nay!”

There have been many hens…many bunnies…and many children too

And did this fable really happen?…Well…I’ll leave that up to you!

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I was resting in a basket
With other eggs so fancy
We were placed there very carefully
By our 8 year old named Nancy

We jiggled ’round as we took a ride
To the grassy park in town
Then we each in turn were gently placed
And hidden on the ground

It was very hard to see beyond
Those real high blades of grass
But I felt very comfortable
As the time did pass

Then I heard the squealing children
Getting closer to my place
I saw as some went by me
I even saw their face

But they all passed and let me be
Maybe I’m too small
I have no arms to part the grass
No feet to help stand tall

Then the noises became distant
And soon no more were heard
“Hey anyone… Please find me!”
But I couldn’t speak a word

There was nothing I could do
To make myself be seen
And although I was brightly dyed
I was hidden by grass green

The sun went down and it got cold
And it was growing dark
The happy kids had long since gone
And left me in the park

All the other eggs were warm and safe
And happy they were found I bet
They were comfortable in their new homes
Being treated like a pet

But as I fought to stay upbeat
And pretend I’m in my bed
I spied a pair of familiar feet
“There you are!” my Nancy said

She picked me up and rescued me
She warmed me with her hand
She carried me back home with her
And put me on a stand

“I’m so glad that you weren’t found”
As she smiled and looked at me
‘Cause you’re my favorite one of all
The Easter eggs I see!”

I’ve got a place of honor
On the center shelf
We’re both happy that I wasn’t found
Nancy and myself

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And as all of his sea neighbors could see
Sam was a bit short of generosity
He kind of kept to himself
Operated in stealth
‘Though he didn’t exhibit pomposity

Then one day our selfish shellfish
Met a cute shrimp named Sue
Sue offered Sam needed help
Showed him how to hide in the kelp
Protecting all his possessions from view

Then Sam’s attitude changed
Got rearranged after that day when…
Sam shared his plankton
Sue gratefully thanked him
And Sam the selfish shellfish was never selfish again

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When they bought it they got a good deal
But the problems they had were quite real
When the rain started in
“Let the mopping begin!”
Mrs. Bleeker would yell from the heel

The kids thought the house was real neat
Living there was a real feat
The roof had this big hole
Staying dry the main goal
They would never give up in defeat

In summer the sneaker got hot
Air conditioning they had not!
And you couldn’t go
Down into the toe
That room smelled bad as it got!

When the Bleekers grew up, moved away
The sneaker began to decay
It was torn down
And they built on that ground
A new high heeled pump that was gray!

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I mean rabbits are like the fastest
Animals you can find
How can a slow and plodding turtle
Beat one to the finish line?

It must be what’s called a fable
That teaches you a lesson
Like “The Boy Who Cried Wolf”
He ended up confessin’

It means don’t take things for granted
And even though you’re slow
If you have perseverance
A long way you can go

You can be successful
You’ll be a winner too
If you do your best at all times
It’s all up to you

When you run the “Human Race”
You’ll never finish last
But it would make things much easier
If you could run fast!

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The dictionary tells you the meaning of wurds
And how to pronounce them as well as nurds
They include all the wurds in the book and bind ‘em
But you gotta know how to spell ‘em to find ‘em

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The Kingdom wasn’t always silly you see
It used to be as sad as any could be
Then our King one day passed a decree
“ALL subjects must at once be quite SILLY!”

Well many found it easy to be
As silly as…well as silly as he
But some like Mr. Perious
Had a difficult time not being serious

The King sent his envoy over to meet
With Mr. Perious living on Somber Street
But it didn’t take long to correct his woes
With huge orange shoes and a big red nose

Then there was the librarian named Miss Proper
She was always serious and we couldn’t stop her
A simple solution was a feather dress
That constantly tickled…everywhere you could guess

So the Kingdom was peopled with the silliest kind
That had never a serious thought on their mind
We were all happy telling jokes and singing a song
That is…until YOU came along!

GET SILLY!

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‘Cause now that I’m a grown up
Many things I have found out
That I didn’t know when I was small
And… I had some doubt

You know there is a South Pole
Well Santa knows it too
In fact that’s where his condo is
With a pool and terrific view

He spends the summers on the beach
Sipping cooling drinks
And he gets a real nice suntan
At least that’s what Santa thinks

Sometimes he overdoes it
He burns his nose and cheeks
And if you look closely you’ll see it
All red and shades of pinks

And Rudolph brings the sunscreen
To put on Santa’s nose
‘Cause that reindeer got sunburned too
And that’s how Rudolph knows

He really only works one day
Of every single year
And I bet you know what day it is
When he brings you Christmas cheer

There also is a golf course
And Santa’s plays a lot
He has elves for caddies
And plenty elves he’s got

And Santa loves the swimming
In the South Pole sea
He’s up early every morning
And takes a nap ’round three

Now that one day in every year
That Santa does his thing
He ’s working very hard all night
Millions of gifts delivering

So we don’t mind that he’s part time
But he sure gets lots of rest
But all the children tell him
“Santa you’re the best!”

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All the other fellas played for teams
But Bobby’s sports were all in dreams
‘Though his sporting life was in the bleachers
He still was popular with his teachers

And after the games his friends would bring
Their homework for help ’cause Bobby was King
A straight “A” student all through school
That kid sure was nobody’s fool

Some of his classmates after graduation
Received scholarships and admiration
Bobby Excelled while he was in college
Acquiring scads of business knowledge

Three of Bobby’s former classmates
Became very famous sporting greats
Bobby could be jealous it would seem
But it was Bobby who owned the team

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If you were a grape you could be in jam or jelly
And you might wind up in somebody’s belly
If you were a grape you might become wine
You’d be in a bottle for a very long time

Yes a grape has potential to be different things
Just like girls and boys that can be anything
Your potential is so great it’s simply amazin’
In fact I’m so old I’ve turned into a raisin

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I can see that he’s been around
In the morning I look on the ground
If there’s lots of white
He came by last night
But who knows where he can be found?

I don’t really believe in him
I think it’s just somebody’s whim
I mean where does he go?
Is the next guy Jack Snow?
His existence seems rather dim

Mom says it’s just a old tale
That he coats every hill and each dale
But I’d ensure early spring
When Jack Thaw does his thing
I’d put that Jack Frost dude in jail!

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Well one day she cooked up a brew
That she called “spell casting stew”
It had an eye of a newt
And an old union suit
She put spiders legs in there too

She threw in a roadkill skunk
I tell you that soup really stunk!
There were two pigeon claws
And three cat’s hair balls
It was a thick creamy gunk!

Well she stirred and it boiled without halt
If it wasn’t nasty it wasn’t her fault
She made a cauldron of goop
But when I tasted the soup
I thought that it needed more salt!

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I’m crammed way down into the rear

With sofa pillows all over me

He’ll look and look and never see

Even his hand can’t reach this deep

Staying hidden I can keep…

From getting poked and squeezed and thrown

Those hard landings make me moan

I don’t mind staying here eternally

I’m peaceful and quiet…just let me be

It’s been a while now and I don’t feel lonely

I’m as happy as ever but there’s one need only

I changed my mind ’cause I realize he’s

Got to replace…my…BATT…Er…ies………

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