My niece Zoe learning the ranks of poker hands the afternoon before her first adult game

The first step of learning poker is to learn the rank of hands.   Teaching this has got to be more carefully done that shoving a list in someone's face.   You want to drill these into the child until they are second nature.

Since the first game they are going to play is five card draw, this is the basis for teaching kids poker and dovetails nicely with learning the ranks of hands.  Here's a simple drill to practice with your child student:

1. Get a list of hands for your student.
2. Get out a deck of cards and shuffle it.  Deal out a five card hand.  Have the child identify all the hands that can be made with those five cards.  Do with entire deck, shuffle, repeat for one more deck.
3. Now shuffle the deck and deal out a five card hand.  Ask them what's the best hand that could be made if they replace one (and only one card) in their hand with any card from the deck.  Ask them the same question but for the second best hand.  So if they can make a full house, ask if they can make a straight, trips, two pair, one pair, etc.  Noticing what hands can't be made with a single drawn card is crucial, and possibly more important than anything.
4. Repeat this exercise for two deck fulls.
5. Now shuffle the deck and deal out a five card hand.  Ask them what's the best hand that could be made if they replace two cards in their hands with any two cards from the deck.   Repeat this exercise with lesser ranked hands.  Having kids understand that you can't make certain hands, ever, with that starting hand is the most important point of this exercise.
6. Repeat this exercise for two deck fulls.
7. Repeat steps 5 and 6, but allow the child a draw of 3 cards for two deck fulls.
8. Finally, shuffle your deck and deal your child a five card draw hand.  Without concern for probability, ask them what is the best hand they can make if they have the option of drawing 1, 2, or 3 cards.

Whenever you feel comfortable in here, start dealing out hands to yourself also, and playing the same draw game as your child.  Ask them which hand is better.  Don't introduce any betting yet, or any probability about what they should be drawing for.

My niece and poker student Zoe scoops in one of many pots

If you are the sort of person that thinks teaching kids to play poker will lead them to a life of

depravity,consider that they will also learn strategy and tactics, psychology and the power of observation, as well as some math and statistical probability.   Despite all this, they might also learn a few valuable life skills, like how to enjoy and evening of beer, cigars, and socializing with friends.

Between my own kids and the nieces and nephews I've got, I've played cards with a lot kids, and taught a few to play poker.  I've done it wrong enough times, and I know enough about poker and the skills you need to develop that I've broken it down into discrete lessons you can teach kids so it's not overwhelming.

Lessons (will be updated as each is written)

• Lesson 1: Learning the rank of hands
• Lesson 2: Learning the flow and rounds of your first poker game (five card draw)
• Lesson 3: Valueing your hand and how to bet appropritely
• Lesson 4: Strategies for making the most money (as opposed to strategies for winning hands)
• Lesson 5: Reading your opponents
• Lesson 6: Combinatorics (learning about hand ranges and how to figure out where you fall in the range)

No, I haven't had anything to say because I've been horrified.  I relate to the tragedy as the father of a seven year old, a member of an elementary school community, and a husband.  Every time I think of the families left devastated by the loss, and the complete brutal and cowardly nature of the killings, I am ill.  Every time I want to circulate one of those essays everyone is passing around, I feel like I'm disrespecting the victims, like I have failed to honor them.    

There have been too many school shootings, I do not think we should "move on" from this one without great reflection.

In an attempt to heal myself, I decided to write a personal letter of condolence to each of the victim's families.  My hope is that somewhere in that process, I will have given them the respect they deserve.   I am joined in this effort by my friend Scott B, who demonstrates his mettle by doing the same thing. 

If you would like to do so too, I have posted on my blog the list of Newtown, CT shooting victims and instructions for sending condolence letters and cards.

(If you are someone that has circulated such stories, I am not judging you.  This is an incredibly personal experience for me, your own mileage may vary.)

Image source.

So if you would like to write a letter, consider writing a letter to the family of one or more of the victims below.  The US Postal service has setup a dedicated PO Box for doing so.

Messages of Condolence for Newtown

Newtown CT 06470

Names and ages of the victims (as published by the New York Times, 12/16/2012)

Children

Charlotte Bacon, 6

Daniel Barden, 7

Olivia Engel, 6

Josephine Gay, 7

Ana Marquez-Greene, 6

Dylan Hockley, 6

Madeleine Hsu, 6

Catherine Hubbard, 6

Chase Kowalski, 7

Jesse Lewis, 6

James Mattioli, 6

Grace McDonnell, 7

Emilie Parker, 6

Jack Pinto, 6

Noah Pozner, 6

Caroline Previdi, 6

Jessica Rekos, 6

Avielle Richman, 6

Bemjamin Wheeler, 6

Allison Wyatt, 6

Adults

Rachel Davino, 29, teacher

 Dawn Hochsprung, 47, principal

Nancy Lanza, 52, mother of shooter

Anne Marie Murphy, 52, teacher

Lauren Rousseau, 30, teacher

Mary Sherlach, 56, school psychologist

Victoria Soto, 27, teacher

I apparently live in the only part of California I can stand, since I don't like heat.  The Bay Area is relatively cool, the rest of California is hot.  San Diego is doubly so.  Everyone needs hats, the bigger the brim the better.  Sunscreen and a water bottle are a must.  

San Diego Zoo vs Safari Park

With limited time and some free coupons in hand we hit the Safari park instead of the zoo, which is out in a part of the Gobi desert known as "Escondido".  It's very hot and sunny there, hydrate often, bring your big hat and your walking shoes.  Free coupons won't get you much except the basic tram tour, and the wait (in the blazing sun and heat) is over an hour for it since it's free.

There are plenty of animals but they're very spread out.  You'll do more walking than animal appreciation unless you drop $300-$400 on the special safari tour where you go in a bus out into the special no-pedestrian-access area and feed giraffes leaves from within your safari jeep.    If you have that kind of money, go for it, it sounds like a once-in-a-lifetime experience.

Legoland

Legoland is not owned by the Lego corporation, it's owned by Merlin Entertainment.  It's actually quite a fun park for little kids.  You won't find any adult thrill rides here, everyting has been scaled down in perceived risk for kids of the 3-13 age group.  If your kid doesn't like Legos, the park is about half as big, since there's a lot of Lego-focused activities.  There's the test, build and race room, where you build a racer out of Legos and run it against the other kids.  There's also many places where you play with Legos or look at enormous models of Legos.  

Go on a weekday and if you're clever, spend the morning in the pool and arrive at Legoland at 2pm.  It's open until 8pm and you'll get only the coolest parts of the day there.  

There's a special deal where you can add a second day to your Legoland ticket for $10 per person.  That's a really good deal, go back for a second day from 2pm 8pm.

Do I need to explain that even though the park closes at 8pm, the store at the entrance stays open a very long time after closing?  

The pool / the place to stay

I don't really know how anyone survives a vacation in July and August in San Diego without access to a pool.  I spent many an hour floating in the one at our "resort", the Carslbad Seapointe Resort.  

Speaking of which, this is an entirely satisfactory place to stay.  We waited too long to make plans and all that was available was this place near Legoland.  We got an apartment with a full kitchen, a separate bedroom, and a couch bed for the kids.  We made almost all our meals and that recouped some of the cost of the room over what we would have paid for a cheaper place without a kitchen and eating out all the time.